Chapter Text
What’s broken can be mended, what’s hurt can be healed. No matter how hard it gets, the sun is going to rise again.
“Meredith,” he breathed out softly, pushing a loose strand of hair behind her ear as he studied the obvious shock on her face, clearly not meaning to have let the words escape her.
“I’m sorry, shit,” she pulled away from him off the couch, pacing as she tried to not run but so desperately wanted to run.
He kept his eyes on her as he stood up from the couch, approaching her cautiously with his hand held out to her. He smiled softly as she took his hand and he gently pulled her close against him, his lips pressing against her forehead before looking into her eyes again, “I love you, Meredith.”
“I need to, uhm…” her voice trailed off and his brow furrowed in confusion as she pulled away from him and headed over to his front door, opening it. He followed behind her and found her picking her bag up off the floor. “I need to be up early, for my Mom.”
He leaned against the doorframe with his arms crossed, watching her with his regular charming smile, “Okay.”
He continued to stand in the same position as she went inside her condo, closing the door behind her. No more than 30 seconds later she reappeared at the door and he raised an eyebrow at her. “Can I stay with you?” She asked, catching her lower lip between her teeth.
He moved to stand in front of her, pressing a soft kiss to her lips a moment, caressing her cheek with his fingers as he pulled back, “Get ready for bed, I’ll be right over.”
“Okay,” she whispered softly, a small smile on her lips.
Not long after, Derek was lay in Meredith’s bed, her head resting on his chest as he had one arm wrapped around her waist. She held his free hand on his abdomen, examining his fingers one by one as they lay together. His arm around her adjusted so that his fingers could play with strands of her hair as he spoke softly, “Get some sleep, it’s been a long day.”
She looked up at him with a small smile, “Thank you, for everything.”
“I’d do anything for you, Meredith,” he smiled back at her, lowering his lips to press against her the top of her head.
“I feel free again,” she murmured softly, slowly linking their fingers together in a gentle squeeze, “He can’t hurt me anymore.”
“I won’t let anyone hurt you again,” he released her hand as he spoke, moving both arms around her and pulling her closer, so that they were laying side by side with their noses barely touching, “I love you.”
“I love you too,” she murmured softly as she pressed her lips against his in a gentle kiss.
An incessant ringing noise woke her, the sun barely breaking through the small gap in her curtains, indicating it was far too early for her to be awake, earlier than she needed to be.
She rolled over, away from Derek and toward the noise coming from her phone on the night stand, she now realised, and reached out to the glaring light on the beside table, grabbing the phone.
She answered without checking the caller ID, her voice still thick with sleep as she spoke, “Hello?”
“Meredith, it’s Richard. Sorry to wake you. Your mother is asking for you, she’s rather agitated and refuses to let anyone near her until you get here.”
She felt Derek’s arms circle her waist as she listened to Richard, and she furrowed her brow as she responded, “It’s not even six am…” a soft groan left her lips and she ran her hand over face in frustration, “I’m up now. I’ll be there soon.”
“Thank you, Meredith.”
She didn’t respond and just disconnected the call. They’d only been asleep for four hours at the most and she was knackered. Derek’s lips pressed against the back of her shoulder slightly when she dropped the phone on to the mattress, murmuring softly, “What’s wrong? Where are we going?”
She turned in his arms, pressing a short kiss to his lips before answering both of his questions, “Ellis has requested my presence or else she won’t let anyone see to her. I’m going to the hospital; you can stay here and sleep.”
“What time is it?” He asked, tightening his hold on her slightly as he kissed her again, bringing a tired smile to her lips.
“Just after half-five,” she told him, watching his eyes open to look at her.
“Hmm, I’ll come with you,” he decided but made no attempt to move, only holding her closer and burying his face into her neck, “You left your car at the hospital anyway, remember?”
“Oh, crap, yeah,” she murmured, and a soft giggle escaped her lips as he pressed soft playful kisses on her neck, “We need to get up then.”
He groaned softly as he pulled his head back to look at her again, but kept his hold around her, “I suppose that would help, wouldn’t it?” He pressed a final kiss to her lips before reluctantly releasing his hold on her waist and rolling over on to his back.
She laughed softly again as she climbed out of bed, covering her mouth as she yawned and switched the lights in the room on, keeping them dim in the room. She could hear his movements as he climbed out of the bed himself while she grabbed some clothes from her dresser, throwing them on to the bed.
“I’ll just go to mine and get ready. How long do you need?” He asked as he came up beside her.
She turned to look at him, a grin spreading across her face at his bed hair and she reached up to run her fingers through it as she spoke, “Twenty minutes.”
“That’ll give me enough time to sort this out then,” he chuckled softly referring to his hair, his arm sliding around her waist as he pressed a soft kiss to her lips, her hand still in his hair.
She pressed her lips back against his, returning the kiss with a slight eagerness as she slid her arm over his shoulder. Their lips stayed connected with a lustrous need as he backed her up slowly against the dresser, his body pressing a slight pressure against her eliciting a soft moan from Meredith. The hand she held in his hair dropped to his shoulder, gently gripping the T-shirt he’d slept in as his hands moved to gently grip her waist.
Breathlessly, his lips pulled back from the kiss, but he kept his forehead gently touching hers as he spoke quietly, “We’ll continue this later.”
“Okay,” her voice was barely above a whisper and she bit her lip gently, her eyes lowering a little as she felt a surprising weight of disappointment in her stomach. And then she felt guilty because she needed to get to the hospital.
He placed a finger under her chin and lifted her face so that he was looking into her eyes again before pressing a gentle kiss to her lips, “I love you. We’ll take this at your pace, I promise. Right now, we need to get to the hospital.”
She nodded with a small smile, “I know”
“See you in twenty,” he flashed her a quick grin and before she knew it, he had left her room to go back to his own condo across the way and she was left alone to get ready.
Derek dropped Meredith at the front of the hospital so he could go and park his car, giving her hand a reassuring squeeze before she left and promising to come find her once the car was parked. She made her way through the halls of the hospital and she had a strange sense of freedom, knowing that she didn’t need to be as scared anymore. She could actually start living her life now.
Her thoughts were interrupted as she headed down the hall to her mother’s hospital room, hearing slight commotion. Richard stood outside looking quite forlorn, but was happy to see her when she approached, “Meredith! You’re here.”
“Richard, what on earth is going on?” She could hear her mother’s raised voice coming from the room but couldn’t make out exactly what was being said.
“The nurse went in at half-four, Ellis had woken up distressed and was asking for you, she said she had to speak to you and wouldn’t let us give her any medication or see to her. We need your permission, as power of attorney, to sedate her, to give her the medication,” she cut him off at this point.
“Don’t, no, don’t do that. She just wants to see me, I’ll go in,” Meredith explained, taking a breath. Her mother wasn’t lucid but demanding to see her. It could be anything. Maybe she’s rehashing an old argument from the past.
“Tell Derek what’s going on when he gets here,” she said to Richard, who only looked confused but she didn’t bother to explain.
She went into her mother’s room and turned to the nurse who was in there, still trying to reason with Ellis. Meredith sent her out of the room and turned to her mother, “Mom, I’m here, what’s wrong?”
“Meredith!” she exclaimed, ushering Meredith closer, “Oh, Meredith, come here,” she held her hand out and Meredith took it, cautiously, sitting on the bed with her.
“Mom, what’s going on?” Meredith furrowed her brow, concerned by her mother’s erratic behaviour.
“You need to know, you need to come home, leave him,” Ellis insisted, her grip tightening on Meredith’s hand, “I know these kinds of men, I know what they’re like, I’ve seen what he’s like. Please, please come home. There’s a place in the residency programme in Seattle waiting for you.”
Meredith’s face fell at her mother’s words, “I’m here, I’m home.”
“Stay here, don’t go back to Boston,” her mother pleaded.
“I’m not going anywhere, I’m here,” she murmured, wrapping her arms around her mother as she brought her into a close embrace, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry that I left, I’m here now.”
She could feel the tears running down her cheek silently as her mother hugged her back, “I just want you safe, Meredith.”
“I’m safe, I’m safe,” her hand rubbed her mother’s back comfortingly, “I’m home, Mommy,” she muttered and felt Ellis relax in her hold, “I’m safe now.”
She slowly released her mother and helped her lay back in the bed. Before she could pull away, Ellis’ hand touched Meredith’s cheek, “You need to eat something, Meredith.”
“I will, I’ll go eat. Please let the nurses take care of you. I’ll be back,” she reassured her mother, who lay back and dropped her hand from Meredith’s face. She gave her one last look before turning around, wiping at the tears on her face before leaving the room.
She looked to the nurse as she left the room, “You can go in, she’s okay now. She’s okay.”
She turned to find Derek leaning against the workstation and he gave her a warm smile as she walked over to him. Before she could speak to him, Richard intercepted touching her arm and making her jump out of her skin.
Derek stood straight and moved over, seeing Meredith in distress. Richard spoke, “Oh, sorry, I just wanted to check…”
“She’s fine, Richard. I need, I need to go,” Meredith could feel her hands shaking slightly and she turned away from the both of them to head down the hallway. She could feel her breaths coming heavier but she couldn’t slow down. She made her way to her office, thankful Cristina wasn’t in there.
She sat on the couch, leaning forward with her elbows on her knees as she tried to calm her breathing. She didn’t hear the door opening and didn’t realise Derek had joined her in the room until he had touched her shoulder and she overreacted, jumping up off the couch, sobs finally breaking through the silent tears that had been falling.
“Hey, Meredith, it’s just me,” he stood up, undeterred by her reaction, and wrapped his arms around her holding her close and stroking his hand over her hair, “Come here, it’s just me.”
She let him hold her close, her face buried against his chest as he sat them back down on the couch, holding her as he let her cry it out. His hand gently rubbed her back and shoulder as he tried to comfort her.
As she started to calm down, she found his hand with her own, holding it tight as she looked up at him, talking quietly with a rasp to her voice, “I’m sorry.”
“There’s nothing to be sorry for,” he reassured her, pressing a kiss against her forehead.
“I need to eat, I told her I’d go and eat and then go back,” she murmured, resting her head on his shoulder.
“We can go get some breakfast,” he suggested, playing with her hair, “how about that place just down the road?”
“I don’t think I’ve been there, I mean it’s very likely that I haven’t been there,” she said with a short laugh.
“They make good pancakes,” he said with a slight shrug, “I also would like to make sure you eat something.”
“Okay,” she said with a soft smile as she sat up and looked at him, her next words seemingly coming out of the blue, “I have this urge to run from you, from us. But I’m trying. I really am.”
“Hey,” he said softly, taking her hand in his with a gentle squeeze, “I know, and like I said this morning, we’ll do this at your pace. I understand, and I don’t want you to be uncomfortable. Now let’s go get some breakfast.”