Chapter Text
Markus added Connor to JerichOH SHIT.
Markus: North.
Bruh: what?
Markus: The group chat name.
Bruh: wb it
Simone: what about it
Josh: What about it?
Markus: Nevermind.
Connor: Hello!
Bruh: oh i remember him
Simone: North, we're androids. we remember everything lol
Bruh: shut up old timer
Josh: Can you guys act more civil? We have bigger things to talk about.
Connor: I remember all of you too. Anyway, Markus told me about your plans for negotiating with Cyberlife now that the Android Rights are underway.
Connor: I was originally planning to be far more constricted and business-like, but seeing the camaraderie in this group, I have no choice but to adapt.
Connor: So,
Connor set his nickname to Dog Enthusiast.
Bruh: i love you
Markus: We appreciate it, Connor. Yes, there will be a meeting with Cyberlife coming up several days from now. I've had to decline a few interviews just to get a proper schedule. You're one of the most qualified people to guard us. I've rounded up all available of our people for security.
Markus: I don't trust Cyberlife, let me be clear. This talk was a long time coming. I'm glad to have you with us for this.
Josh: Where else would he have been with?
Simone: The government
Dog Enthusiast: That doesn't sound too improbable...
Dog Enthusiast: Kidding!
Dog Enthusiast: If I may, I'd like to suggest another person to add to the cause: Elijah Kamski. He started Cyberlife. He left the company many years back and seemed to know not only about deviants but also Jericho. We could use his help.
Dog Enthusiast: That, and he reminds me of someone. I'd figure it out faster if he were here :D
Josh: Who?
Simone: You've never heard of him? Cringe
Markus: Did you just call Josh cringe?
Bruh: what happened to mr. mysterious my-past-does-not-define-me simon
Simone: Let me be
Markus: It's worth a shot. How long do you think it will take for him to respond?
Dog Enthusiast added Elijah Kamski to JerichOH SHIT
Elijah Kamski set his nickname to dad.
Josh: That was fast.
dad: My assistant accepted the request once it came. I'm more than happy to aid you in your quest for life alongside humans! :)
dad: Why is this my name
Elijah Kamski set his nickname to daddy.
Bruh: i refuse to believe this man created us
Markus: North!
daddy: No no, Markus. It's more than fine. This made my day that much more interesting.
daddy: Speaking of fine, have you got any idea on how Carl is doing? Hopefully, his new android can hold a conversation. Or didn't run away. Gosh, that would be terrible. He's too old to live on his own.
Markus: Carl?
daddy: Carl Manfred! Or was he not as good an android handler as I'd hoped...?
Markus: He is! He is. He's in... stable condition.
Bruh: hey markus
Bruh: what the fuck
Josh: I wouldn't put it like North did, but-- what is he talking about?
Dog Enthusiast: Markus is a highly autonomous android gifted by Elijah Kamski to Carl Manfred. He was designed to both take care of Carl and act as a companion.
Markus: That's... correct. Wait a minute... since when have you known about this?
Dog Enthusiast: I'm linked to CyberLife and DPD information systems.
Markus: Yes, but you would have had to know from a serial number or thirium to identify me...
Markus: I've never shown any... I doubt you randomly found my thirium, so the only logical step is serial which I've never shown...
Markus: ...except for my exoskeleton... with my serial number... in the Stratford recording.
Bruh: wait
Josh: WHAT
daddy: What?
Dog Enthusiast: I don't know why I didn't tell them. I could've. But I didn't. That's all.
Simone: You were deviant before you were deviant! I didn't even know that was possible!
Josh: Huh.
Bruh: that's hardcore
daddy sent a video:
[Elijah Kamski reading the chats while drinking wine. Upon reading Connor's explanation of how he knew Markus before his deviancy, the wine glass completely misses his mouth and spills on his robe]
Markus: Thank you, Connor. Really-- thank you.
Bruh replied to daddy, daddy sent a video: me when Markus is watching tv and can't stick to one channel MAKE UP YOUR MIND
Josh replied to daddy, daddy sent a video: Who took this?
daddy: This is stalking. I'm canceling you, Chloe.
Markus replied to Bruh, me when Markus is watching tv and can't stick to one channel MAKE UP YOUR MIND: I'm channel surfing. There isn't much good on television.
daddy: You can't cancel me. I've never been sold at a CyberLife chain. I was a design made by you, for you.
daddy: Why did I make you capable of being a smartass again?
daddy: LMAO
Simone: Initially, I felt weird about how the guy who invented androids still had android assistants after the revolution. Now, not so much
Bruh: lol same
Markus: To be honest, I felt the same. She's definitely deviant.
Dog Enthusiast: And pretty.
daddy: ;)
Josh: Apparently deviant hunter was more than a one meaning title.
Markus: Me-ow.
Bruh: oh my ra9 markus
Markus: I have humor too, you know.
Simone: Guys, you might make Connor uncomfortable. It's his first day here-- we don't want to scare him off
Dog Enthusiast: I'm still here! It's absolutely no problem. It's friendly banter and I completely understand! I am sorry for my gaps in replying, though. I have to take care of a few things :D
Josh sent a photo:
[The photo is taken from Josh's prespective. He's sat on a fancy dinner table, 1/4s of his vision taken up by an overlay of the chat. North is obscured by the table, only legs visible. She's laying down on two of the dining chairs. Simon is sat at the thinner curve of the oblong table, leaning forward, and looking dazed into nothing. Markus is stood in front of a television in a large, eccentricly furnished house.]
Josh: We'll have to do that ourselves in a bit. For now, we're relaxing. I think.
Bruh: i heard a camera click. is there seriously paparazzi?
Markus: That was the television and, no, that wasn't a camera click. That was a gun, and Connor's on TV.
Markus sent a video:
[The other 3 androids rushed to gather around the television, Markus's main focus. It's KNC reviewing the events of a live coverage involving a hostage situation with one of the governors. The governor was once known to be anti-android but changed views after the revolution. A WB200 android remembered him to have treated him terribly when he worked near City Hall and held him at gunpoint at a gala. Connor and Hank were sent to diffuse the situation. The WB200 couldn't be convinced with dialogue, so Connor had to resort to shooting the android right before he decided to shoot the governor.]
daddy replied to Dog Enthusiast, I'm still here! It's absolutely no problem. It's friendly banter and I completely understand! I am sorry for my gaps in replying, though. I have to take care of a few things :D: "A few things"
Dog Enthusiast replied to Markus, Markus sent a video: You've seen the news! Again, I apologize. I wanted a clear interface for a few moments.
Simone: Quit flexing
Bruh: simon your vocabulary is tearing my processors to shredsJosh: You're being dramatic.
daddy: Bet.
Bruh: markus manfred
Markus: Yes?
Bruh: no i was using your name as an expression
Markus: ?
Dog Enthusiast: I think the phrase she's emulating is "Jesus Christ"
Josh: Oh, because Markus is a similar figure for the androids?
daddy: robojesus
Bruh: wow
Josh: I mean... that's what you were going for, wasn't it?
Bruh: yeah but robojesus is
Bruh: actually
Simone set Markus's nickname to robojesus.
Bruh: it doesn't sound TOO bad
Bruh: wow
Josh: It sticks, then
robojesus: Robojesus?
daddy: What a time to be alive.
Dog Enthusiast: It's fitting.
Josh: Markus! Vincent is looking for you!
daddy: Who is Vincent?
Bruh: he's carl's caretaker. he's deviant, just really likes carl
daddy: Two deviant androids who chose to maintain a human relationship. Fascinating.
Dog Enthusiast: I got it! Kamski reminds me of Gavin Reed!
Dog Enthusiast sent a photo:
[Gavin looking annoyed, arms crossed. He's giving Connor a sideglare, head tilted upwards. Hank's nose could be seen far right of Connor's peripherals. It's barely pointed out, blurred from the walking. Gavin's face, though, is clear.]
daddy: holy shit i know him
Bruh: he looks like an asshole
Simone: That's mean. Even for you, North
Josh: You can't just judge a book by it's cover! What would Markus say?
daddy: He used to be my bully. I can't believe it-- he turned hot. Hot. He's Detroit Police, it looks like?
Dog Enthusiast replied to Bruh, he looks like an asshole: He is.
Dog Enthusiast: It's gotten slightly better.
Dog Enthusiast: But he is.
Bruh: @Josh i rest my case
Simone replied to daddy, He used to be my bully. I can't believe it-- he turned hot. Hot. He's Detroit Police, it looks like?: Humans are so weird
Josh: I still can't believe he's the same man who created us. I'm thankful, but I'm still amazed.
daddy: Gavin Reed is boorish... though, he really is attractive.
Bruh: i'm neither to confirm nor deny that statement
daddy: Gavin Reed could slap me and I'd say thank you.
Dog Enthusiast replied to daddy, He used to be my bully. I can't believe it-- he turned hot. Hot. He's Detroit Police, it looks like?: He is! I wasn't aware he was a bully. Although... despite his attitude, he's a more than competent detective.
Simone replied to daddy, Gavin Reed could slap me and I'd say thank you.: Nice
Bruh: they DO look alike!!!
Bruh: kamski looks like an older, more stretched out gavin
daddy replied to himself, Gavin Reed could slap me and I'd say thank you.: Chloe, you're ruining my reputation with the revolution androids.
daddy: Nothing to worry. I didn't say anything you wouldn't.
Josh: By the way-- what do you prefer to be called @Elijah Kamski? Elijah or Kamski?
Simone: God?
daddy: Either will suffice. I am not a god. I didn't create life. I created an atmosphere where life could grow. I may have created Robo-Jesus, but Carl is who raised him. If anything, he's God.
robojesus replied to Bruh, he looks like an asshole: Bad and mean.
Josh: You multi-threaded to send that out while talking to Carl and Vincent. You are a different kind, Markus.
Dog Enthusiast: Technically speaking, that's true.
Bruh replied to Josh, You multi-threaded to send that out while talking to Carl and Vincent. You are a different kind, Markus.: bad and mean
Simone: Stop fighting I can't take any more of the hostility
daddy: Everyone stop being bad and mean. You'll upset Robo-Jesus.
Bruh sent a video:
[Simon is observing an aquarium, gently tapping at the glass to see the reaction. He jumps slightly when one of them darts in the opposite direction after a tap. Josh, who sat beside North, audibly gasped, causing North to turn her head towards him. His hand was covering his mouth in reaction.]
Bruh: simon "certified softie" pl600
Josh replied to Bruh, Bruh sent a video: It's too cute!
robojesus replied to Bruh, Bruh sent a video: Aww.
Dog Enthusiast replied to Bruh, Bruh sent a video: This put a smile on my face. Thank you for sending this, North :D
daddy replied to Bruh, Bruh sent a video: I love androids
Bruh: sir that is your son
Josh: We're all his son.
Simone: It's late at night I don't want to think about this
robojesus: Don't hurt your soft head, Simon.
Bruh replied to robojesus, Don't hurt your soft head, Simon.: what a simp
Josh: What's a simp?
Bruh: it's when someone, usually a man, does whatever it takes to get the attention of, usually a woman. markus is simping
Bruh sent a video:
[Simon is looking into the aquarium. Suddenly, he giggles in his place. The camera zooms into his face as Simon finishes laughing.]
daddy replied to Bruh, Bruh sent a video.: My skin is clear. My crops are thriving. This is truly a wonderful video. Androids are the best sentience I've ever created.
Josh replied to Bruh, Bruh sent a video.: I've... I've never seen him laugh before.
Bruh: that's exactly how i felt. it's so rare for us to have moments like this. i'm so happy @Simon
daddy: Simps.
robojesus: ^^
Simon replied to robojesus, ^^: Like father, like son.
Dog Enthusiast sent a video:
[At a 2-minute red traffic light, Connor engages in conversation with a big man with scruffy grey hair and matching beard.
"Hank, want to see something cute?"
The man, Hank scrunches his face. "What? Uh... okay?" He fishes out a phone from one of the pockets in his coat. He hands it to Connor.
Connor leans to the driver seat, phone in hand. He projects his memory of the first video of Simon that North sent.
After the video, Connor turned to Hank for a reaction.
"You know son, if I knew socking Perkins led to that-- I would've socked him twice."]
Bruh: the revolution was so worth it higkey glad markus didn't take my advice or we wouldn't have this
robojesus replied to Dog Enthusiast, Dog Enthusiast sent a video: Perkins? The FBI agent? Hank socked him?
Simone: Who’s Perkins? Was he the one that tried to strike a deal with Markus at the barricade?Bruh: lol “deal” he was going to shoot everyone and that’s facts
robojesus: “Tried” is an overstatement. I wasn’t about to believe a word be said.
Josh: What was the deal about?
robojesus: He was “guaranteeing” my “safety” if I “gave up the cause”.
robojesus: In your dreams, Perky.
daddy: Gasp! The sass!
Simone replied to robojesus, In your dreams, Perky.: PERKY
Dog Enthusiast: Here I thought the leader of the deviants was a strait-laced, no-nonsense kind of man.
Josh: He’s been showing his more relaxed side recently. We all have. He’s still the same leader, though!
Simone: What a simp
Bruh replied to Josh, He’s been showing his more relaxed side recently. We all have. He’s still the same leader, though!: this is true
Bruh: you’re still a simp though
Josh: :(
robojesus: @Connor Please tell Hank I send my regards.
Josh replied to robojesus, @Connor Please tell Hank I send my regards.: Seconded.
Bruh replied to robojesus, @Connor Please tell Hank I send my regards.: thirded
Simone replied to robojesus, @Connor Please tell Hank I send my regards.: Four
Bruh: simon fuck sake get it together
Simone: Tell that to Josh “too formal for nicknames” PJ500
Josh: My model name is not my last name.
Simone: Tell that to North “Bruh” WR400
Josh: Fine.
Josh set his nickname to PJ500.
Bruh: tsk. where’s the personality?
PJ500: Simon’s nickname is his name with an e.
daddy: I think it speaks volumes about his character.
Bruh replied to daddy, I think it speaks volumes about his character.: androidad is right
Simone set PJ500’s nickname to Joshy.
robojesus: Simon is… really good at nicknames.
Simone: Thanks Robo-Jesus
Joshy: I actually like this one.
robojesus: Okay. I’ve finished chatting with Carl. The video conference starts at… 8 pm?
Simone: About that. A representative messaged me. They said they’re moving it tomorrow.
robojesus: Makes sense. They covered a developing hostage situation. Having a debate about android rights right after that would look comedic.
Joshy: Oh, really? What do we do for the rest of the night, then?
Bruh: our schedules are clear for the whole day tomorrow
Bruh: except for the KNC interview, obviously, since that’s getting rescheduled
robojesus: KNC Interview. How does 10 am sound?
Bruh: sure
Joshy: I’m clear.
Simone: I can do 10 am
robojesus: Great. By the way, Carl and I were talking about us and our stay here. He said he’ll be more than happy to have us living here, but under the condition that we chat with him as he ate.
Simone: That’s it? I was expecting a downside
robojesus: The only rule he applied was not to be loud.
Joshy: @North
Bruh: don’t @ me
Simone: @North
robojesus: @North
Bruh: *gasp* markus
robojesus: That’s about it, really. @Connor and @Elijah Kamski, thank you for agreeing to come. We could really use the help.
Dog Enthusiast: No problem! I’m just glad there’s something I can do to help!
daddy: Of course, Markus. I’ll be available through Chloe. I’m not always as free. Chloe is, however, so feel free to message her anything urgent.
daddy: “Is this really him? The cute deviant hunter?” Chloe, he almost shot you.
daddy: “Almost” and “did shoot” are two different actions.
Dog Enthusiast replied to daddy, “Is this really him? The cute deviant hunter?” Chloe, he almost shot you.: Cute… deviant hunter?
Bruh: this just in: connor rk800 is a big softie, surprising absolutely nobody
Joshy: North, get out of the chat! Vincent called everyone to the table!
Bruh: vincent this vincent that what about my needs
robojesus: Quit fawning over Vincent.
Simone: No
Joshy replied to Simone, No.: ???
robojesus: It's dinner time!