Chapter Text
Kyungsoo finds Jongin from time to time, perched upon Kyungsoo’s favorite couch in his underground abode, materializing in front of him unannounced but always with the same elated expression painted across his face. Kyungsoo has long grown accustomed to these sudden visits, but the quickening of his heart gave away an emotion he would rather not wade deeper into. Jongin’s loyalty lay only with his whims and wanderlust, and Kyungsoo was a mere rest stop along the road, a small detour in the journey, before Jongin would disappear as quickly as he had arrived.
“Missed me?”
The dim light is just enough to make out Jongin’s smirk, candlelight casting shadows across the younger man’s tanned skin and Kyungsoo curses under his breath. Despite how smug Jongin sounded, Kyungsoo admits he’s missed Jongin’s voice.
Feigning indifference, he returns Jongin’s greeting with a curt nod of his head, moving around the couch to reach his wardrobe. The couch is situated in the center of the room in between his wardrobe and the bed, and Kyungsoo is fully conscious of the way Jongin’s eyes follow his every move as he changes into his sleeping garments, every flick of his fingers as he undoes the buttons of his shirt and puts on the change of attire.
“Where did you go this time?” Kyungsoo asks, not daring to meet Jongin’s gaze.
Jongin’s excitement is evident in his voice the moment he answers “Tekapo,” and Kyungsoo listens quietly as Jongin goes on to describe the ethereal star-filled skies of New Zealand’s southern island. When Kyungsoo moves to sit on his bed and face Jongin, the man is no longer looking at him but facing the ceiling, likely now projecting in his eyes the luminous night skies of Tekapo. Jongin waves his hands in the air as he indulges happily in the retelling his experience, almost child-like in his fervour.
The world seems so much more beautiful when Jongin describes it, and an affectionate smile has spread across Kyungsoo’s face by the time Jongin is done with his tale.
A comfortable silence engulfs them as Jongin’s eyes slowly meet Kyungsoo’s, and the elder man pats the space next to him on the bed.
Jongin’s eyes light up, any hint of the smugness on his face moments ago is gone. When the younger man can easily cross distances in an instant, he chooses not to. He gets up from his seat slowly, deliberately, to walk towards Kyungsoo.
“You didn’t answer my question though,” Jongin states with a pout as he reaches the foot of the bed. Pacing both hands on Kyungsoo’s shoulders, he gently pushes Kyungsoo down against the bed and climbs on top of him. His eyes scan Kyungsoo’s face, patiently.
Kyungsoo doesn’t bat an eyelash. “You asked a question?”
Jongin shakes his head and chuckles as Kyungsoo pulls on Jongin’s collar to meet him midway.
I missed you.
---
Kyungsoo wakes up with the familiar rumbling of Earth around him, the candlelight flickering with each reverberation. Despite much persuasion throughout the years, Kyungsoo finds peace in solitude, buried deep in the Earth with it pulsing around him and tucked away from the tumultuous world above. Today is no different, as he lies in the warmth of his bed, alone and untroubled.
Something next to him stirs, and Kyungsoo’s eyes widen to realize Jongin is still sleeping next to him. It isn’t the first time - but it’s been years since the last time it’s happened. As half of his conscious rejoices at the sight, the other half warns him this will only make parting harder. After all, tonight Jongin would probably share a bed with another body, in a place Kyungsoo wouldn’t know the name of, far from his reach and none of his business for that matter.
The first half gets the better of him, and Kyungsoo reaches out to trace his fingers across Jongin’s face. He knows he’s being selfish, but he’s also missed Jongin too much to let a rare moment like this pass. The man stirs at the touch, the corners of his lips curling upwards as Jongin opens one eye to peer at Kyungsoo.
“That tickles.”
Kyungsoo doesn’t stop, nestling closer so they are facing each other, only breaths apart. Jongin has opened both eyes by now, brown orbs studying Kyungsoo curiously.
“Come with me,” Jongin murmurs abruptly, placing his hand atop of Kyungsoo’s on his cheek.
Kyungsoo feels his heart drop. The words sound alien coming from Jongin’s mouth, misplaced and almost frightening.
”You know I can’t.”
Jongin frowns, “What are you scared of? You’re not bound here.”
Kyungsoo is, in truth, scared of a lot of things. Earth is Kyungsoo’s safeplace, he doesn’t think he can bear the thought of leaving it.
Despite the tranquil tales Jongin may bring each time he visits, Kyungsoo knows the cruelty of the world above and he knows he is powerless to its endless bloodshed and hostility once he steps outside his underground den for too long.
He’s scared of losing Jongin most of all, of having to come to terms with the truth that he might not be the only one. At least here, deep underground in his haven, Kyungsoo could pretend that Jongin was his - and only his - even if for only a night every once in a blue moon.
“What are you scared of?” Kyungsoo bites back, voice harsher than he intends. “Why can’t you stop running around and just -”
Stay. Be with me.
Kyungsoo clamps his mouth shut and shakes his head, “Forget it. Just go.”
Kyungsoo tries to ignore the hurt that flashes in Jongin’s eyes. The younger man opens his mouth as if to say something, but shuts it with a solemn grimace. Without another word, Jongin brushes away Kyungsoo’s hand from his cheek, slips out of bed and disappears into thin air.
While Kyungsoo finds peace in solitude, for the first time, he feels utterly and terribly alone.