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"Pans! Wait up!"
Pansy knew that she should probably turn around, that she should at least explain to Neville why she had to leave, but she couldn't make herself. She knew that as soon as she saw those green eyes, she wouldn't want to go anywhere. She did however stop in her tracks.
"Where are you going?" Neville panted. He'd run to catch up with her? Was she that important to him? She had figured that he wouldn't have even noticed her slipping out of the party and for her to now find out that was not true was something that she didn't know how to respond.
"I don't belong there, Neville." She said quietly. It had been made glaringly obvious to her that she shouldn't have even gone to his party in the first place when no one, except for Luna, had even bothered to talk to her. As far as everyone else was concerned, she was still the enemy, even though the war had been over for two years now.
"What are you talking about? You're my friend, aren't you?" She could hear the frown in his voice without needing to see those eyes.
Pansy paused for a moment. She had been his friend since their fourth year, almost six years now, but it wasn't as if they had been able to be completely honest about it.
"Dance with me." Pansy had grabbed the nearest boy to her when Draco's attention had flickered away from her. She had expected as such - why he even asked her to the Yule ball in the first place was beyond her. He didn't even like her. And she didn't particularly like him either but they had been raised to at least tolerate each other and so that was what she was determined to do.
The boy she had just demanded to dance with her stared at her with wide eyes and she was pretty sure that he had stopped breathing. Her reputation had preceded her once again. She looked him up and down only to realise that she knew him as well. He was the school loser. She just as out managed not to let out a groan.
"Well?" She asked an eyebrow lifted slightly as she watched and waited for him to come back to life. This was a dance after all so he should have expected that he would have to do the dancing part at some point, right?
"I - I - okay." He stuttered out. There was something about his spluttering that was somewhat endearing, almost cute, but Pansy brushed that off as the boy wrapped his arms around her waist.
Pansy wrapped her arms behind his neck and let him lead. When she'd been practising with Daphne, she had always had to play the part of the boy, mainly because Daphne had played the 'older sister card' (meaning that she always had to play the boy when dancing with Astoria). It had been a nice change to come to this ball and to have actual boy's lead - even if her dance with Draco had only lasted half a song.
She certainly wasn't going to complain about how good this big smelled as she looked up at him, like freshly mown grass and moly. She had to admit that she'd never really taken the time to look at Neville Longbottom before but she supposed that he could have almost been called handsome - if he wasn't such a loser.
She tried not to think about that last part as she let him lead her across the dancefloor, somehow skillfully avoiding the other couples, though she wasn't even aware that they were now. She was lost in those green orbs and the twinkling music that was filling the room.
When the song ended, she let him go with a nod and an almost-smile. She was careful not to be too nice to him in case any of her fellow snakes were watching. She could handle whatever they wanted to throw at her, but she didn't want to be the reason that they gave him an even harder time.
"Thank you." She said with a slight courtesy before she moved off of the dancefloor and decided to go and find Daphne who she was sure would need to be rescued from Gregory by now. Somehow her best friend had been roped into attending this affair with one half of Dumb and Dumber - something that she had managed to escape and she supposed she could thank Draco for.
"Yes. We're friends." She said quietly as she clasped her hands in front of her. The problem was that Pansy didn't want to be friends - or at least she wanted to be something else as well as being friends, but while his friends continued to hate her, it just wasn't an option. She couldn't be the person who threw a spanner in the works.
"Then come back?" Neville suggested. There was a slight edge to his voice and Pansy realised that he was probably frustrated that she wouldn't even look at him. She knew how important eye contact was to him. They'd spent a lot of time since the Yule ball in greenhouses - first under the pretence that she needed tutoring and then simply because she enjoyed his company and that of the plants.
Despite being named after a flower, Pansy had never actually appreciated them until Neville had taught her how. She didn't care much for aesthetics, as far as she was concerned, once you had seen one flower, you had seen them all, but the medicinal and magical properties that each plant held was intriguing. Having Neville to explain every single one to her was magical in its own right, but she didn't dare say this aloud.
"I can't." She took a deep breath and finally made herself turn around, her eyes meeting his and a moment of weakness passed over her. She found herself taking a step towards him before she made herself stop. "Your other friends, they don't want me there, so I think it's best that I just-"
"They do like you!" Neville cut her off, his eyes wide.
Pansy let out a snort and shook her head, now aware of the water that had fallen onto her person at some point since she had exited his house. When had it started raining? "Then they're doing a poor job of showing it." She commented as she ran her fingers through the ends of her now damp hair. "I just want to go home." She said quietly.
It was mostly true. She wanted out of there to avoid making this situation even more awkward than it already was but it seemed that Neville was determined to keep her there, especially as he closed the distance between them. She watched as he took her hand into hers.
"I'm sorry they haven't made you feel welcome." He said softly, but his apology just made her feel worse. Maybe she should have just stayed and tried to endure it? Maybe she was meant to have just put up with feeling like the outsider for his sake.
She started at his hand for a long time before she shook her head again. "It's fine." She said quietly. "Get yourself back inside, okay? I'll see you Tuesday for tea?" She didn't want him to think that she was avoiding him, even though that was exactly what she wanted to do. She wanted to just quietly cut him out of her life in a way that he wouldn't even notice. He had good friends, friends who had his back, and they were probably right about not trusting her anyway.
It was Neville's turn to sigh but eventually, he nodded. "Yeah, tea on Tuesday." He agreed and with a kiss to her temple, he turned on his heel and headed back along the path.
Pansy watched him walk back towards the house. She wanted to call out to him, to call him back to her, but she made herself keep her mouth shut. It was better this way, or at least that was what she was trying to convince herself of. Once he was out of eyesight, she turned to continue her walk home. She'd have to apparate after a while, but first, she just needed to clear her head.