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It was Brian’s first night at John’s place, where he would be staying for as long as he wanted. They had finally decided to move in together, splitting the rent two ways for the small, one bedroom apartment. As everything seemed perfect for the two, it was only expected that something bad had to happen on the first night.
Brian woke up next to John, first smiling at the way his boyfriend snored so quietly. He started to move a bit closer to wrap an arm around him when he felt something in the bed. And he lifted the covers, immediately being hit in the face with the smell.
It wasn’t two seconds until he realised what was wrong, and he shot up out of bed, cringing at the way his wet pants stuck to his legs. There was no way… John couldn’t know about this. He would never be able to live it down, and the other man would think he was disgusting.
He quickly pulled his pants off and put a new set on, before walking over to the bed, wondering how he was suppo sed to clean this up without John knowing. Maybe he could spray it with something, and it would dry before John was even awake. Then, it wouldn’t smell as bad.
Brian hurried to the kitchen to get some sort of cleaner, and just as he was walking back in the room, John was already sitting up in the bed, inspecting the stain on the bed, and he looked up when Brian walked in.
“Did you piss yourself?” he sounded grossed out, and it made the older man’s heart speed up.
“N-no! I just spilled some, erm, tea, and I just felt bad, so I thought I’d try to clean it off your bed before you woke up.” John laughed, getting up off of the bed.
“I thought I’d told you, love. It’s our bed, okay? You moved in here with me, you get rights to the bed.” Then he started to pull the sheets off. “Let’s just take care of it, okay? It’s just a bit of tea.” Brian was worried John was going to realise by the smell that it wasn’t tea, but he didn’t say anything about it, so Brian didn’t either.
-
That night, they were watching a movie, Brian sitting atop John’s lap, making it so that John wasn’t much focused on the screen and more on placing soft kisses on Brian’s neck. His boyfriend had already fallen asleep, breathing lightly against him.
It was the cutest thing he’d ever seen until there was something hot in his lap, and he could feel it spreading out, not even stopping. So he tried to shake Brian awake, seeing his eyes flicker open, and as soon as the man felt it, his eyes shot open.
“Eppy…? What the fuck did you--?” The sheer amount of disgust he could hear in John’s voice scared the living hell out of him. Would the man make him move out? He’d just pissed on him to surely he would.
“I’m so sorry. Christ. So sorry, love. I don’t know what happened,” he lied. “I’ve never--” he lied again, and John still said nothing, only had his eyes squinted in what seemed to be revulsion. “John?”
“I knew it happened last night, but… I didn’t think it happened very often, so I didn’t say anything about it, maybe spare your pride or whatever, but… Brian…” He trailed off, and Brian got even more worried. John never called him by his full name. Never. In a panic, he stood up off of his boyfriend’s lap and ran off to the toilet, eager to clean himself up.
He showered as fast as he could and sat naked on the toilet until he heard John’s footsteps walk past to the room. A small knock came at the door, and he jumped a bit.
“I brought you something to wear if you want it.” He didn’t say anything, much too embarrassed to admit he needed it. “Alright. I’m just gonna leave it here and head off to put some petrol in the car.” Brian knew very well they didn’t need any. He’d just filled it the previous day. And he also knew that John was all gross, too, and he probably wanted to shower. But he seemed to be giving Brian a bit of space until he was feeling a bit better about it.
He listened as John left and then put on the clothes, walking out to the couch. He sat in absolute silence until there was a knock on the door. He got up and went to open it, seeing John, shifting around.
“W-why are you knocking?” he whispered embarrassedly, stepping aside so John could come in.
“Left my key at home,” he mumbled in reply as he shuffled inside and hung up the car keys. It only took a second for Brian to realise that they kept a key to their apartment on both of their car keys, so there was no way John could’ve left the key at home…
-
He stayed up nearly all night that night, had barely got an hour of sleep, completely terrified of having another accident in front of John. He was glad the man opted not to say anything about it, but he was still humiliated.
That day, however, he was so tired, and he knew he wouldn’t be able to stay up the next night. But John nudged him as he sat at the table eating breakfast. “Hey, Eppy, Paul wanted us to come over tonight and work on some stuff for the upcoming album. You alright with that? We might stay the night.” Before the last statement, he’d had no problem with it. But there was no way he could tell John that this happened on a regular basis, because that would be humiliating.
“Erm, yeah,” he whispered. “Yeah, that’s alright.” It wasn’t alright. He was going to wet himself again, and there was nothing he would be able to do about it.
-
That night, he fell asleep on Paul’s couch, John and Paul asleep on the other one. He woke up and saw the two of them snuggled up together, and he would’ve been jealous if it weren’t for the wetness of his pants right now. And the couch cushion beneath him. Because, shit, what was he going to do about this?
He got nervous as he stood up, walking slowly over to John to tap him on the shoulder. The guitarist made no effort to open his eyes. “John,” Brian whispered, fearful we would end up waking the younger man sitting next to him. “John, please w-wake up.”
Then he shifted, opening one eye and glancing at his boyfriend. “Eppy, what are you doing up? It’s early.”
“I h-had an accident…” John woke up a bit more to assess what had happened, and he noticed how close Brian was to tears.
“Oh, god. Erm, you okay? What a stupid question. Of course you’re… not. Let’s just tell Paul we’ve got to leave. You can go get in the car. I’ll--”
“John, no, the couch. We can’t just leave it like that. That would be awful.”
“Eppy, just go get in the car. I’ll clean it and let him know we had to leave early. It’s really not a problem.” Brian sighed, but left nonetheless, waiting in the car until John was done. And John immediately went over to Paul, shaking him awake. “Macca! Macca, I need you to wake up, please.”
“John… oh, god, did I fall asleep on the couch? Fuck, my back is going to feel horrible all day--”
“Eppy pissed on your sofa,” he said quickly, embarrassed for the man.
“What?” He got up off of the couch and glanced at the other one.
“You can’t tell him you know. I told him I’d clean it up, but I honestly have no clue how I could do that without you knowing.” Paul eyed him. “Please, he’s really upset about it.”
“Okay… I’ll deal with it. Just tell him I said I’m not upset or anything.”
“Paul, he-- he doesn’t need to know I told you. Please don’t tell him you know.”
“God, right… right, okay.” Paul nodded, and John smiled weakly at him, following Brian out to the car.
The older man was curled up on the passenger seat, hugging his knees to his chest in shame. “John, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to. I just…”
“Does this happen often, love?” Brian looked over at him hesitantly. “I don’t want to make you feel uncomfortable, so if you don’t want to talk about it, that’s fine. I just thought--”
“It happens a lot whenever things change.” John nodded slowly and put his seatbelt on. Brian said nothing more, so John took over the conversation again.
“Like when you moved in…” A nod followed. “God, sorry. I didn’t think that would’ve… if I had known--”
“John, I wasn’t going to not move in with you because of this. I love you. Maybe I should’ve just told you, and it wouldn’t have been a problem.”
“Don’t blame yourself, love. I wouldn't have told me, either. I know how I can be about things.”
“John, you’ve really been nothing but lovely. God, I don’t know what I would’ve done without you today, or yesterday…” He sighed, letting his legs fall back down to the floor. “I’m still sorry you had to deal with that, though.”
“It’s fine,” John rushed out of his mouth before the conversation progressed any further. “I’ll just get you back home, okay?” Brian nodded.
“Yeah, okay. Thanks so much. You’re the best.” John smirked.
“You’re amazing, too. You know that? You are such an amazing boyfriend.” Brian just rolled his eyes. “Love you, Eppy.”
“Love you, too.”