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Aurelia vaguely remembered walking into her and Jaina’s room, the dull excuse of “I need to use the restroom,” ringing distantly in her memory. In reality, she needed to get away from the noise. She knew Clawthorne game nights could get… rowdy… but for some reason tonight it just got a bit too much.
The witch could feel her chest tighten and her throat ache dryly each time another round of yelling erupted from the living room. The slamming of something -- a door, a hand against a table, a body hitting the floor-- had her flinching away from the door to their room. She crept towards the bed, every fibre of her body screaming “Hide! Don’t be seen! Be quiet!” She grasped for a blanket -- soft, cream-colored, smelling of Jaina and the ocean air-- pulling it tight around herself, sinking to the ground and curling into a ball near the window. She tried to calm herself, telling herself that she was fine, no one was going to hurt her, mother couldn’t hurt her- Her breath hitched with a sob when the yelling picked up.
Someone, Eda most likely, had been caught cheating and it sent the family into an uproar. The arguing intensified, more slamming along with something heavy tipping over, sending things clattering across the ground. A weak whine slipped past her lips as she buried her face into the fabric of the blanket, trying to force herself to focus on the safety the scent and texture brought her. Aurelia chastised herself, she was thirty-seven years old, for titan’s sake. Yet here she was, hiding in the dark depths of her and her wife’s room having a stupid breakdown over some yelling , like some sort of child . She thought she had outgrown these attacks.
She flinched at the feeling of something crawling up her leg, only to calm slightly at the sight of her palisman Regius making his way up to her lap. Usually, her palisman stayed upon her staff, never leaving unless instructed to -- as expected of a Blight’s palisman, anything less would be a failure -- but tonight Regius had slithered his way over to her, climbing up until he curled loosely around her neck. Aurelia murmured a soft “thank you”, raising a hand to gently pat him. His cool body helped ground her, helped her focus, and calm down from this attack.
Aurelia didn’t know how long she sat there until she heard a muffled “Wait, where’s Aurelia?” come from behind the door. She let out a quiet string of curses, reprimanding herself for being gone so long as to cause notice. It was one thing to have a breakdown, but another to have one so long that people would notice her absence. Really now, she was too old for this.
As she adjusted herself so she could stand, a knock at the door had her flinching and curling in on herself again. “Auri? Are you in there?” came from the other side of the door, a wave of relief washed over the witch in question at her wife’s voice. She didn’t trust herself to speak just yet -- it usually took her a few minutes to find her voice again-- so she drew a small spell circle in the air, opening the door for Jaina. Aurelia watched her wife enter their room, closing the door behind her with a soft click . Soon, a soft orb of light lifted from Jaina’s hand and began to dimly light the room. From where she sat, Aurelia let out a wet laugh, thinking about how she must look.
Jaina looked at her wife, a mixture of concern and confusion on her face as she stepped closer to her. “Auri? What happened love?” she asked quietly, moving to kneel before the other woman. She stayed quiet, not quite comfortable with saying “Yeah, your family sent me into a panic attack, sorry dear!” Instead, she just opened her arms, a silent question for a hug which Jaina quickly complied. Regius let out a quiet hiss, slipping from his master's shoulders down to the floor to avoid being squished. Aurelia mentally apologized to her poor palisman as she nuzzled her face into the crook of her wife’s neck, inhaling her scent deeply.
The comforting warmth and pressure of Jaina holding her chased away the last dregs of fear that clutched at her heart, allowing her to finally relax. She felt exhausted, now that the adrenaline had left her system. Then, the embarrassment began to creep in, chastising her once again.
“Sorry…” was all she could muster, clutching tight to the back of Jaina’s dress. Sorry for ruining the fun. Sorry for being a mess. Sorry for not being able to handle some fucking yelling. Aurelia voices none of these apologies, knowing Jaina wouldn’t have any of them. Still, she couldn’t help the guilt that was now gripping her heart.
“Darling… you have nothing to be sorry for.” Jaina huffed, placing a soft kiss on Aurelia’s shoulder. “It’s alright… Why don’t you go ahead and get ready for bed? It’s about time game night ended anyway.” She didn’t pull away, allowing Aurelia the chance to do so herself. She stayed quiet for a few moments more before speaking up.
“Won’t you need help cleaning up? Plus, I’d feel bad for suddenly disappearing and having game night end so early… I know how much these nights mean to you and your family…” She winced, hating how her voice sounded. The way her voice wavered and broke around certain words… it was awful and unbecoming of her. She hated how weak she felt at that moment. Aurelia gently shook her head, trying to rid her mind of the thoughts.
“Hush, it’s perfectly fine love. I can just say you got sick and needed to go to bed early tonight. Don’t worry about cleaning anything, I’ll make Eda and Alba clean up their mess…” Jaina spoke softly, beginning to rub circles across Aurelia’s back. “Heh, they ended up flipping the coffee table by the way. Turns out Eda had been hiding cards underneath where she sat.” She let out a huff of laughter at her sister’s antics. Aurelia let out her own weak laugh as she imagined the scene.
“Okay… Okay, I’ll start getting ready for bed.” She said, slowly pulling away from her wife’s embrace. She felt like shit, and could really go for a nice warm shower to help ease the tension of her body. “Thank you, Jay… for everything…” She leaned in, giving Jaina a chaste kiss before moving to stand. Reaching out a hand, she allowed Regius to climb back up onto her shoulders. The palisman let out an appreciative hiss, curling into a ball again. Jaina moved back before standing and stretching, wincing at the ache of her joints.
“Alright lovely, I’ll join you soon.” Jaina smiled, kissing Aurelia sweetly. She turned and began heading back out to the living room, looking over her shoulder once last time at her wife with a smile. And with that, Aurelia was left in the dimly lit room to prepare for bed.
