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Josh was a deadbeat. He’d heard it enough from the teachers at school, gotten the look this overweight security guard was giving him enough times before that told him as much. It still sucked every time somebody reaffirmed that, especially strangers who didn’t even know him at all. He scrambled to sit up on the bench and gathered his backpack and jacket as the security guard barked at him that the bus station was closed and he had to leave.
Running away had been something Josh had thought about for a while, but when it actually came to going through with it he’d done it on the spur of the moment. He didn’t plan ahead, and as a result by the time he’d gotten into the city it was late at night and he had no idea where to go.
The only places still open seemed to be various clubs and bars. The short lines of people outside dressed up for the night looked him up and down as he passed in his jeans and hoodie, and he pulled his cap down lower on his forehead. The temperature was dropping further at night these days, and even if he layered all the shirts he’d rolled up and stuffed in his backpack he’d probably still be cold. Josh had a moment of panic realizing that fall gearing up towards winter was probably the worst time of year for him to make himself homeless, but he forced that thought away. Right now he just had to find another temporary place to get off the street for the night.
A group of drunk people stumbled out of a doorway right ahead of him, laughing raucously, and Josh turned into a small side street to avoid them. A neon exclamation mark glowed in the dark further down on the opposite side of the street. A literal sign. Well, he had nowhere else to go.
Standing right in front of the door, Josh saw that the sign above it actually said “Pete’s!” but everything other than the exclamation point, glowing red, had burnt out. There was no intimidating doorman outside like the clubs on the main street so he opened the door and stepped inside, hoping that this was just a regular bar. It was a darker than he expected inside, more red neon lights above the bar giving the place a slightly pink glow. It seemed a little suspicious that there appeared to be absolutely nobody inside even though an 80s-style jukebox was quietly playing an old Pixies song. Josh walked cautiously up to the bar and set his backpack down on a stool, looking around and wondering what kind of place he’d walked into.
There was a haze of smoke in the air to the right, and Josh realized with a start that there actually was a patron in the far corner. He was staring at Josh and didn’t look away when Josh looked back at him. Josh didn’t think it was legal for him to be smoking in here, but he wasn’t about to call the guy out on that and draw attention to himself. He was thinking about asking the guy what the deal with this place was when somebody on the other side of the bar said, “Hey.”
Josh jumped and turned to see a short dark-haired man in a red t-shirt with arms covered in tattoos, raising his eyebrows at Josh as if waiting for an explanation. The t-shirt had STUMP CLUB written across the front in white, and Josh briefly wondered if this place had had a recent name change.
“I, uh…” Josh didn’t know which story he should go for; he was taller than this guy and broad-shouldered, so he might be able to pass for a college kid and not get kicked out. Or he could just tell the truth and ask if he could hang out in here until whenever they closed while he tried to figure out what to do next. The man looked pretty tough, though, despite the fact he was several inches shorter than Josh, and he really didn’t want to risk getting thrown out into the cold again, so he just blinked helplessly.
“You seem a little lost. You a friend of Tyler’s?” the man asked with narrowed eyes, and Josh grasped the lifeline without thinking and said, “Yeah.”
The man’s expression brightened into a smile that seemed almost too big for his face. “Have a seat, then, I’ll bring you a drink. I don’t know when Ty is going to be back.”
Josh sat down in a wall booth on the opposite side of the room from the smoking man, who moved over to the bar shamelessly to get a better look at Josh. Josh checked the front pocket of his bag for the small roll of notes he’d tied with an elastic band. He’d left most of his money at home for his mom and siblings with the note he left on his bed. He couldn’t take much, that had been the whole point of leaving.
The man came out from behind the bar and frowned when he saw Josh worriedly counting the bills he had, placing an opened bottle of beer in front of him. “It’s on the house, man. A friend of Tyler’s is a friend of Pete’s.”
“Um, thanks,” Josh mumbled, momentarily relieved until he remembered that he was not actually a friend of Tyler’s, and whenever Tyler came back, whoever he was, it was going to be obvious Tyler had never even met him and then Pete was going to kick him out of his bar. That was if Pete didn’t actually kick the crap out of him. He may have been shorter than Josh, but he looked a whole lot tougher.
A muffled voice yelled for Pete from beyond the door behind the bar, and Pete disappeared back through it. Josh pushed the beer bottle from hand to hand across the tabletop before figuring he might as well just drink it. If Tyler showed up before Pete came back, maybe he could just leave.
He realized he was drumming his fingers on the edge of the table just as the guy still sitting at the bar coughed loudly. Josh looked over and the guy waved. He’d finished whatever he’d been smoking in the corner and now that he was closer to Josh, he could see that the guy couldn’t actually be more than a couple of years older than him.
“Is it always this dead in here?” Josh asked, feeling uncomfortable even though the jukebox was now pumping out Van Halen into the silence.
The guy laughed. “Well, this is the kind of place only frequented by the people who know where it is.”
“It’s not that hard to find, is it?” Josh asked. “I mean, I know the sign’s burnt out…”
“It’s not about the sign, but yeah, I don’t know why Pete hasn’t fixed it yet.” He slapped his hand down on the bar loudly, yelling, “Hey, Pete! Do I have to get my own drinks around here now?”
He turned back to Josh. “The sign used to say ‘Panic!’, you know. I think it used to be some kind of gay disco bar. It’s a shame Pete ruined it when he bought it.”
“Can it, Urie,” Pete said as he carried a box of bottles through the door and set them on the bar. He slid a bottle down to the guy, who was laughing at the look on Pete’s face. “What am I paying you for?”
“The gift of my presence.”
Pete raised his eyebrows. “Patrick needs my help in the back, so yell for me when Tyler shows up. Can I trust you not to talk shit to the new guy?”
“Your help with what, exactly?” he replied, wriggling his eyebrows. He jumped off the stool and out of reach when Pete attempted to swat him, dancing over to Josh’s booth and sliding in opposite him. “And me, talk shit? Frankly, I’m wounded.”
Pete rolled his eyes and called over his shoulder, “New guy, yell for me if he annoys you too much.”
Josh took a swig from his bottle and tried to pretend he was just minding his own business. When he set the bottle down, the other boy was staring at him with a mischievous smile.
“What’s your name, new guy? I’m Brendon, since Pete didn’t bother to introduce me properly.”
“Josh.”
“Well, Josh, as I was saying, it’s not about the sign. This place isn’t open to the public, it’s really only open to people who have invitations. And you just walked right in.”
Josh opened his mouth even though he wasn’t sure what to say, but Brendon just raised his eyebrows and whispered, “You don’t even know Tyler, do you?”
“I. Um.”
The door swung open, letting in a draft, and a boy who looked around Josh’s age came in. He headed straight for the bar without looking around, allowing Josh to get a good look at him. Despite the cold outside he wasn’t even wearing a jacket, just a loose plain white t-shirt that showed the tattoos down his arms and a black beanie pulled right down over his ears.
Brendon didn’t take his eyes off Josh as he said, “Hey, Tyler.”
The boy looked over, eyes flicking to Josh, who attempted the most pathetic half-wave he’d ever done in his life. Brendon snorted. Tyler swung the duffel bag he’d carried in onto the bar and picked up a black hoodie from on top of it, shrugging into it before walking over to the table.
“Your friend’s been waiting for you,” Brendon grinned, as Tyler took the half-empty bottle out of Brendon’s hand and tipped his head back.
“Hmm?” Tyler said, wiping his mouth on the back of his sleeve. He looked from Brendon to Josh, eyebrows drawn down in confusion.
Tyler physically looked maybe even younger than Josh now he could see him up close, which surprised him. There were shadows under his eyes and weak stubble along his jaw. Despite the tattoos, he was so skinny that it was hard for Josh to be scared, so he tried to channel please help me please just go along with this as he met Tyler’s eyes. Tyler seemed to pick up on his desperation, because he pointed one of the fingers wrapped around the neck of the bottle at Josh.
“Yeah, my friend. Right. Thanks for keeping him entertained, Brendon.”
Brendon looked suspiciously at Josh, who tried not to appear too visibly relieved.
“You’re welcome. Want me to go get Pete, then?”
“Yeah, he needs to double check Frank gave me the right amount. And tell him the sign’s almost completely gone. Exclamation point was flickering just now.”
“Will do. I’ll leave you in peace with your, er, friend.”
“Thanks,” Tyler said, equally pointedly, waiting for Brendon to slide out of the booth so he could take his place.
“Yo, Pete!” Brendon yelled as he jumped over the bar. “Josh’s buddy finally got here with the goods!”
The door swung closed behind him, cutting off whatever Pete’s reply was.
Tyler looked steadily at Josh as he drained the last of Brendon’s bottle. Josh edged his thumbnail under the label on his own drink and started to peel it off until Tyler’s hand came down on top of his and pulled it off the bottle, setting it down on the table.
He withdrew his hand just as quickly and said, “Are you gonna tell me what you’re doing here pretending you know me, Josh?”
“I just… I didn’t have anywhere to go. I was just going to sit in here as long as I could while I tried to figure things out, and Pete asked if I know you so I just thought…”
Tyler nodded, pulling the beanie off his head. His hair was sticking up in random tufts that made him look even younger, made worse when he ran his fingers through it. Josh noticed that there was chipped black polish on his fingernails. “I get it. It’s a risky game to play, though.”
“I’m sorry. Honestly I was just going to go as soon as I could find somewhere, like I have a map in here, I just didn’t want to look so obvious on the street and it’s cold and there are-"
“Alright, alright, calm down, dude. I’m not going to tell Pete.”
“Not gonna tell Pete what?” Pete asked from behind the bar. He partially unzipped the duffel bag and checked inside before zipping it up again and lifting it up.
“That ‘Pete’s!’ is a stupid name for a bar anyway and you might as well rename it when you replace that useless sign,” Tyler replied.
“Are those new guy’s words or yours, smart mouth?”
“This smart mouth talked Frank into giving you a little bonus,” Tyler grinned at Pete, leaning back with one arm resting along the back of the seat. A dimple popped out in his cheek when he smiled that widely, and Josh did not need to think about the way it made his heart constrict.
Pete looked sharply at Josh, who went back to picking at the beer label. He was curious about what was going on here but he got the feeling Pete was wary of him hearing too much. “Did you, now? Well, we’ll see if he didn’t mix up the numbers again.”
He turned to go back through the door, through which Brendon’s muffled laughter could be heard, but turned back to say, “And you’d better explain what’s going on with new guy over there when I get back.”
Tyler watched him go before looking back at Josh, seeming surprised to find Josh watching him.
“Why does he keep calling me new guy?” Josh asked.
“Do you want to be the new guy?” Tyler deflected.
“Uh… what does the new guy have to do? Does Pete think you told me to come here to see if he’d hire me for a job?”
“Something like that,” Tyler smiled. He fidgeted with the sleeves of his hoodie, pulling them over his fingers.
Brendon came through into the bar, carrying a crate and grumbling to himself. “Why do we even need this much stock?”
He’d rolled his sleeves up, and when he put the crate down and started unpacking its contents Josh spotted the track marks on his forearms. He looked back to Tyler, wide-eyed, who was watching him carefully.
“It’s not what you might think,” he said, as Josh’s hand twitched towards his backpack. Tyler put his hand over Josh’s again to stop him from moving. Tyler’s fingers were warm, and even through Josh’s worry that he’d gotten tangled in something worse than he’d intended there was a fluttering in his stomach.
“Listen, if you really have nowhere to go I can help you,” Tyler whispered urgently, squeezing Josh’s hand. Brendon was whistling loudly to the song playing on the jukebox, looking over at them frequently while he restocked the bar.
“Why do you want to help me?” Josh asked. “I could just go and try my luck out there somewhere. I really don’t want to get mixed up in this.”
“You don’t know what ‘this’ is yet. And you don’t have to,” Tyler replied. “Trust me. I was like you, Josh, when I got here. You can trust me.”
Josh really, really wanted to trust Tyler. Not just because those brown eyes were shining at him like Tyler really, really wanted Josh to trust him too. Not just because he wanted to know how Tyler ended up here.
Josh tried to remember what he’d seen of Tyler’s arms before he put the hoodie on. Unusual black tattoos, but no track marks. Maybe Tyler was right, he didn’t quite understand what the situation was. He thought about his other options, going back out into the cold and maybe finding a doorway to sleep in until places opened in the morning, and the uncertainty of his future when the only certain thing was that it was only going to get colder.
“Do you know somewhere I could stay?”
Tyler’s face broke into a grin. “Of course. You can stay with me, if you want. I can go and talk to Pete for you. Don’t worry, I can sort things out.” He drummed his hands flat on the tabletop. “This is gonna be great. It’s going to work out, Josh.”
Tyler slid out of the booth and ducked under the hinged part of the bar instead of lifting it up, going to find Pete. Josh followed him over to the bar and leaned against it awkwardly, watching Brendon, who was now wiping glasses and replacing them on a shelf.
“Figured things out with Tyler, then?” he asked, in a way that made it clear that he knew they’d both been bullshitting. He smirked at Josh and put the rag he’d been using aside, leaning on his elbows on the top of the bar with his chin in his hands. “It’s going to be fun to have some new blood around here.”
“Can I – um -" Josh’s eyes dropped to Brendon’s arms, and he immediately drew back, rolling the sleeves of his plaid shirt down.
“No, you can’t ask about that,” he said sharply, but his face smoothed back out almost at once into the easy-going smile Josh was beginning to recognize as his default. It was a little disconcerting. “You shouldn’t be worried about this. It’s nothing to do with Pete, just so you know. We’ve all got our shit we’re trying to sort out, right?”
Josh nodded. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m sorry for…”
Brendon waved his hand in the air. “Forgiven, doesn’t matter. Anyway, if Pete decides you’re in - which he probably will because all Tyler has to do is bat his eyelashes and stare with those wounded puppy eyes and he’ll get whatever he wants – you’re going to just be doing this.”
He waved his arm to indicate the bar. Josh didn’t want to dig himself a hole, but he cautiously asked, “What about ID?”
Brendon smiled knowingly. “You mean does it matter that you’re not even old enough to drink in a bar?” He laughed at the expression on Josh’s face. “Do you think me or Tyler would be here if Pete was really that stringent about us being twenty one? Don’t you think Pete would have thrown you out on your ass when you first walked in here, instead of giving you a free beer?”
“Yeah, well…” Josh rubbed the back of his neck to try to disguise his embarrassment while Brendon continued to chuckle to himself. “How old is Tyler, anyway?”
“That’s Tyler’s business,” Brendon replied evenly. “Anyway, do you want to know how it works around here or not?”
“Um, okay.” Josh was already realizing that Brendon liked to talk. A lot.
“You’ll probably be the doorman of sorts, as well as the barman. We’ve all been taking turns with it but there are more important things Pete needs to deal with, and Patrick has his actual job, and I think Pete’s been getting annoyed with Tyler for being too risky with his deals so – “
“Deals?” Josh blurted out. “But you said-“
“I said my personal issues are nothing to do with Pete. I also said you’d just be taking care of normal business here while everyone else takes care of the actual business. Both of which are still true.” Brendon looked at Josh. “Tyler wouldn’t have gone out of his way to pretend he’d actually asked you here if he didn’t think you could handle this.”
“No, I wouldn’t,” Tyler agreed. Brendon turned and gave him a sarcastic wave as he closed the door behind him.
“So, Josh, how about it?” Tyler asked, crossing his arms and leaning onto the bar next to Brendon.
“Pete wants me to work here?” he asked, surprised. Tyler nodded. “Just in the bar? Nothing… else?”
Brendon rolled his eyes, but Tyler smiled, a little sadly. “Yeah. I told you it’d be fine, didn’t I?”
“I believe you,” Josh said, though he didn’t quite, but it was worth it to see Tyler smile properly again. And it really wasn’t like he had any better options. “Sure. Okay. I’m in.”
Brendon cheered and punched the air. “Welcome to the gang. We’ll get you a t-shirt printed.”
Tyler held out his hand for Josh to slap then made a fist for him to bump. He wasn’t quite quick enough and Brendon sniggered, but Tyler smiled patiently. “We’re gonna have to come up with a proper handshake or something.”
“We’re a playground gang now?” Brendon said, skipping over to the back wall to resume polishing the glasses.
“Tell Pete we’re done here for the night, will you?” Tyler asked as he jumped up onto the bar and swung his legs over, making Josh dodge them so he could hop down on the other side. He grabbed Josh’s backpack from the booth and tossed it to him, heading for the door.
“I’ll just grab those bottles for you, shall I?” Brendon called after them. “Assholes.”
“Love you too,” Tyler called back cheerily without turning around.
Josh had become so accustomed to the warmth inside that he immediately shivered when they stepped out into the cold night air. He could hear a blur of distant loud music coming from several establishments on the main street.
Tyler walked over to a white van parked a little way down under a dim streetlight and knocked on the window. A guy rolled it down and leaned out, and Josh felt a small pang in his chest when he saw the battered comic book in the guy’s hand and thought of his little brother.
“Hey Mark, can you run us back to the house?”
Mark looked Josh up and down. “Pete got a new recruit, huh?”
“Yup. This is Josh. Josh, this is Mark. He used to be in art school but now he drives Pete’s van around and occasionally sells his photographs of lower class living to rich-guilt publications.”
“Did you share your life story with him, too?” Mark grumbled.
“I’m saving that for later when we have the heart-warming bonding scene while the sun sets in the background. Can you drive us back to the house?”
“Not your personal taxi service, Tyler. I’m waiting for Pete to give me my cut for tonight.”
“Aw, come on, Mark. It’s cold out.”
“Then try jogging home, it’ll get your circulation going and keep you warm.”
Tyler sighed. “Jerk.”
“And there I was about to tell you to hop in and drive you out of the kindness of my heart.”
“No you weren’t.”
“Nah, I wasn’t. The look on your face was funny, though.”
Tyler kicked the van’s front tyre as he turned back to Josh. “Come on, Josh. Looks like we’re walking downtown.”
Josh followed Tyler, who turned left onto the main street and kept going, hands shoved in his pockets.
“How far from here do you live?” Josh asked as he walked a little faster to catch up to him.
Tyler shrugged. “How far is far?”
Josh was silent, so Tyler turned to look at him, walking backwards. He saw the way Josh was anxiously looking around as they walked. “Are you worried about being out at this time of night?”
Josh laughed, a little nervously. “I just don’t really want to get mugged or stabbed or something, you know?”
Tyler laughed too. “I usually prefer for my insides to remain on the inside as well. Don’t worry, we’ll be alright.”
“How do you know?”
Tyler shrugged again and turned back to face the way they were going. “I don’t.”
They walked in silence for several minutes, leaving the sounds of city night life behind them. They reached a quiet overpass and Tyler stopped halfway along to peer over the edge. After one in the morning there weren’t many cars, but he watched the headlights of a truck passing underneath.
Tyler turned back towards Josh but stared past him into the night, and as wary as Josh was he sped up and jogged past Tyler, turning round when he reached him to see what he was staring at.
“Was there someone behind me?”
“No, no,” Tyler shrugged it off, but he put his hand back on the railing and didn’t look Josh in the eyes. “Just looking at the city.”
The lights of the city, still awake and alive, were spread behind them and across to their left. It was the kind of view that would usually be breathtaking, that Josh might have taken a picture of on his phone, but he’d sold his cell phone for cash before he left.
Josh pulled the sleeves of his hoodie down over his hands and balled them into fists, shifting restlessly from one foot to the other. Tyler was leaning over the edge of the safety railing, staring down in silence. Josh waited for two cars to pass underneath them before tentatively saying Tyler’s name.
He rubbed his nose awkwardly when Tyler turned around. “Can we go?”
“Oh. Sorry. Are you cold?”
Josh stamped his feet, holding onto the straps of his backpack. “Uh, yeah.”
“Let’s go then. We can race,” Tyler grinned. He dropped to one knee next to Josh. “On your mark…”
“Hey!” Josh called as Tyler skipped the rest of the countdown and took off at a sprint, disappearing into the darkness at the other end of the overpass. “I don’t know where we’re racing to!”
He walked after Tyler, the sudden fear of being abandoned making him pick up his pace into a jog.
“Tyler? Tyler!”
“Shh!” Tyler appeared in front of him and pressed his hand over Josh’s mouth. “Don’t yell. You don’t know who might be around.”
“Can we just go back to your place? Please?” Josh was grateful that his voice didn’t crack. He didn’t want Tyler to think he was scared.
“Here.” Tyler held out his hand, and Josh took it hesitantly. “I’ll show you the way.”
He took off running again, pulling Josh after him, but Josh kept up easily. Some of the only things he had been good at in school were track and soccer. It felt good to be running, though he didn’t know who might be around in the dark, and he didn’t know where Tyler was leading him either.
Tyler stopped alongside a chain-link fence with overgrown grass from the garden on the other side tangling in it and dropped Josh’s hand, leaning over with his hands on his knees to catch his breath.
“You’re fast,” he noted once he’d recovered, and Josh just smiled. He’d thought that Tyler was leaning on the fence, but he pulled at part of it and a gap appeared. The chain-link had been cut with something previously that allowed Tyler to roll it back just enough for him to wriggle through.
“Come on,” he said, holding it open for Josh, and Josh looked from Tyler to the sign secured to the fence with plastic cable ties. Even in the dark he could read the black letters on the white background: FORECLOSED. Someone had spray painted a three-pointed crown over it in red. The spray paint had dripped down and dried, staining the fence below the sign too. Josh swallowed his questions and pushed through the fence. The grass was knee high, but there was a clear path a little to the right that Tyler waded over to. Weeds still sprouted from the cracks in the cement, but it was a lot easier to walk on.
Josh followed Tyler up the slope to the house. The windows on the first floor were boarded over with plywood, but Josh could see a faint light in several of the upstairs windows. The back door was uncovered, with a pile of broken pieces of wood with moss growing on it to one side. Tyler leaped onto the decking and reached for the handle, and the door swung open easily.
“Do you actually live here?” Josh asked, leaning around Tyler cautiously to peer into the dark doorway. Tyler pushed him gently in the small of the back and he stumbled over the threshold. The door closed behind them, but Josh didn’t think he heard it latch. He was distracted by a bluish glow in the darkness, and realized that they appeared to be in a kitchen, and there was somebody sitting at the table.
“Hey, Hayley,” Tyler said quietly, and with a snap the light disappeared, to be replaced with the harsh yellow glare of the overhead light a moment later. A short girl with the brightest blue hair Josh had ever seen hopped down from her stool and walked over, tucking the laptop she had been using under her arm.
“Back late again, Tyler?” she said reprovingly, but she was smiling. She looked over at Josh, taking in the way he stood close to Tyler. “Brought a friend back too, I see.”
“It’s not like that.” Tyler rolled his eyes, thankfully not noticing the way Josh blushed at Hayley’s wink when he caught on to what she meant. “This is Josh. He’s going to be working for Pete.”
Hayley adjusted the laptop under her arm and waved at Josh. “Well, nice to meet you, Josh. See you around.”
She walked past them towards the door on the other side of the room, which presumably led to the rest of the house. Josh watched her go, then turned to see Tyler watching him.
“How many people live here?” Josh asked. He had a lot of questions, but Tyler was yawning.
“I’m not sure. People come and go all the time. There’s probably about ten of us who’ve been here just over a year now.”
Josh raised his eyebrows, and Tyler headed in the direction Hayley had gone, flicking off the light as he passed a switch by the door.
“I’m not sure which rooms are free, and I don’t know about you but I don’t really want to check out the whole house and bother people right now, so you can just stay in my room tonight.”
“Okay,” Josh whispered, feeling the need to be quiet as Tyler led him down an unlit hallway. Tyler fished something out of his hoodie pocket and a tiny orange-blue flame sprang into life from the lighter in his hand.
“Don’t want you to fall in the dark,” he whispered, and used the faint illumination the lighter afforded to show Josh the stairs. At the top Josh automatically turned right, but Tyler grabbed him by the hood and pulled him to the left, clicking the lighter off.
He opened a door and reached along the wall for the light switch, and Josh blinked in the sudden light again.
“Welcome to my kingdom,” Tyler said, with a mock-grandiose sweep of his arms that encompassed the bare wooden floorboards, the bed beneath the window covered in a tangle of blankets, and the walls, which appeared to have once been a plain cream color and were now covered in sporadic patches of graffiti. There were stylized skulls here and there, and a lot of words. Josh leaned in closer to read a scribbled line on the wall closest to him.
do not be alarmed if i fall into the sun
“Hey, what’s…” he straightened up sharply at the sound of a lock clicking. Tyler held up the key to show Josh and reached up to balance it on top of the frame.
“Just a precaution, okay? Don’t worry.”
“You keep saying that, but I’m worrying.”
“Try not to think about it.”
Tyler crossed the room, shrugging out of his hoodie and slinging it over the back of a wooden chair that was pushed up against the wall, beside a large dresser that seemed to be in use as a desk.
Josh gingerly leaned against the wall by the door, the spot he still hadn’t moved from. Tyler was busy kicking off his battered sneakers and shimmying out of his jeans. Josh awkwardly tried to look anywhere but at Tyler for a few seconds while he pulled his shirt over his head, then realized Tyler didn’t seem to care whether Josh was watching him or not. There was an uncomfortable heavy feeling in his chest when he saw how skinny Tyler really was, so he looked away, searching the room for the best place to lay his things down.
“Uh, where should I –?”
Tyler tossed his clothes on top of a bulging black trash bag that was overflowing with crumpled clothes and walked past Josh to the bed.
“You can sleep here,” he said with a shrug. “The floor doesn’t look too comfortable, and it’s not exactly warm.”
He climbed into the bed and moved over to the side against the wall. He sighed when Josh continued to stand there.
“Dude, it’s a double, it’s not like there’s not enough room.”
“Yeah,” Josh said uselessly, slowly kneeling down to untie his shoelaces.
Tyler yawned again and rolled over to face the wall. “Turn the light off whenever you’re done.”
Josh shrugged out of his hoodie and toed off his shoes, trying to speed up so as not to bother Tyler. He didn’t feel that comfortable stripping right down to his underwear, so he kept his t-shirt on. He clicked off the light before he remembered to check his bearings. He knew vaguely how far the bed was from where he stood, but he didn’t want to blindly stumble across the room.
“If this house is abandoned, why do the lights still work?” Josh muttered, mostly to himself, but Tyler’s voice floated towards him through the darkness.
“A guy at the power company owed Pete a favor. The power still doesn’t work in some parts of the house, though.”
Josh followed the sound until his shins bumped the side of the bed frame, and felt around for the edge of the blankets. He climbed in carefully, and lay there next to a strange boy with his head on an unfamiliar pillow that didn’t smell like the detergent his mom used, with the taste of beer still in his mouth. He had his toothbrush in his backpack, but he’d forgotten to pack any toothpaste, and it didn’t seem to matter now anyway.
He wasn’t going to cry, he told himself as he scrunched up his face in an attempt not to. Not when Tyler could hear him.
“Why did you run away, Josh?”
Tyler’s voice was so quiet that Josh thought maybe he hadn’t actually heard him say anything, but there was a rustling and the dip of the mattress as he turned over away from the wall. Josh knew Tyler couldn’t see him in the dark, but he still tried to keep his face as neutral as his tone.
“I couldn’t afford to stay.”
Tyler was silent, and Josh wondered if he’d understood Josh’s meaning.
“Why did you leave home, Tyler?”
Josh listened to Tyler breathe evenly for what seemed to be a while until he said, “I never had one.”
Josh waited, but Tyler didn’t elaborate. He hadn’t pushed Josh to tell him the whole story, so Josh didn’t ask him to either. After a while Josh realized that Tyler had fallen asleep, one of his knees pulled up against Josh’s side. He could have moved over away from him, but it was more of a comfort than an annoyance.
Josh thought he could hear music playing faintly somewhere in the house, but when he strained to listen there was only silence. He was half asleep when he heard footsteps going past the door, but he was too weary to be afraid anymore. The door was locked, and he had Tyler.