Work Text:
Rumiel sat in her chambers turning over a small pair of scissors in her hands. They'd all just returned from a long excursion in the Western Expanse leaving her skin a couple shades darker than usual and her hair falling just at the bottom of her ears. Well, that and there was sand everywhere now. Bull was still complaining about finding sand in... uncomfortable places. While the feeling of sand in her boots wasn't her favorite in the world it wasn't what concerned right now. A light knock at the door drew her focus away from her own reflection in the mirror. She turned her head and called over her shoulder, “Come in.” The gentle way the door opened and shut and the soft footsteps on the stairs gave her visitor's identity away. There were only two people in Skyhold she knew that moved so quietly, and Cole didn't bother to knock.
“Pardon the intrusion, but Cassandra wanted to let you know that the prisoners are ready for judgment at your convenience.” Solas approached her from behind. She watched him coming from the mirror and despite everything she had on her mind a smile started to spread across her face. He often had that effect on her. He stopped, placed a hand on the backboard of her chair, and smiled back at her.
She turned to face him. “Thank you, I should be ready shortly.” He nodded, the scissors catching his eye. His head tilted slightly, like a cat when presented with a new curiosity.
“It appears I may have interrupted something. Is something bothering you?” Rumiel shifted uncomfortably in her seat, bringing her arms in and looking away from him. Solas gracefully moved in front of her in response. “You know you can talk to me ma vhenan. If you have any burdens I would help relieve you of them if I can.”
Rumiel clutched the scissors for a moment then sighed. “It's just... my hair has gotten longer. I didn't keep up with it in the Expanse.
Solas' head tilted again in confusion. “Surely there is more to it than that.”
“Yes... My hair used to be very long. I would wear it in a long braid down my back. When I was little and still new at my magic the Keeper used to say that everyday I didn't burn it all off was a little miracle.” They both chuckled at that.
Solas leaned back onto the dresser. “I can picture it now. A little Rumiel running through the forest. Her hair trailing behind her, only slightly singed.”
“You're honestly not too far off.” She laughed. “Anyway, when the Keeper told us that he wanted to send some representatives to the conclave I knew that I wanted to go. I wanted to see the world outside the clan just for a little while. But the Keeper was reluctant, even though I was only the second. He was concerned I wouldn't return.” She looked down at scissors in her hands. “So I cut off all my hair and swore I wouldn't grow it again until I returned to the Clan. I think he found the gesture more ridiculous than convincing but in the end he let me go, and here I am.”
“Here you are, and the world is all the better for it.”
“I hope so. It's just with everything that's happened and everything I've done...” She trailed off.
“You aren't sure that you will return.” Solas said, finishing her thought. Rumiel nodded. “And how do you feel about that?”
She shrugged, “I don't know. I like where I am. I like the people I've met. I love feeling like I have a use here, not like at home where I'm just sort of the backup. Until Corephyus is defeated at least, then who knows if I'll be needed for anything. But... I miss the Clan. I miss Geren, and Picen, and Lialva. I suppose I just feel homesick, as silly as that is.” For a moment, neither of them said anything. She was starting to feel embarrassed that she'd said anything at all. Surely he thought that she was being childish. She had an important mission to do, there wasn't time to sit around pining for home. Then suddenly Solas reached over and put his hand over the scissors. She looked up into his eyes and found them sympathetic. More so than he'd ever looked before when they discussed her clan.
“May I?” He asked ever so gently, his hand not even closing around the object until she nodded her head yes.
He moved around behind her and began cutting away at her hair with the same confidence he did all things. She felt his hands run through her hair, lightly pulling and moving to make sure everything was in the right place. She loved the feel of it. It was so different than when Geren fixed it before she left. The skin on her scalp tingled where his fingers had been, and she could feel her face get hot when they accidentally brushed against her neck. When she looked at Solas in the mirror she could see a slight blush on his cheeks as well even though he looked at her head with such concentration it seemed more like he was casting a complex spell than cutting hair. “Now you know I don't want you to cut it all off, right? I'd rather we didn't have matching hairstyles.” she said, teasing.
“Very funny. It'd be smarter to save the jokes until after the scissors were out of my hand.” He said, brushing some stray hair off of her shoulders. “You know, it's been a very long time since I've had a place I cared for enough to feel homesick for it. I envy you a little in that.”
“Well... maybe you'll find one someday.” With me. She didn't say it, it was too soon by half, but she didn't need to. The words hung in the air like a question. A question he didn't seem to want to answer.
He cut away a little more, evening out the edges. “Perhaps.” He said quietly. Not a promise, but not a refusal. She'd take it. “There, it's done. What do you think?”
She looked herself over in the mirror, turning her head to try and see as much of her hair as possible. “It looks good. I think I've discovered how you supported yourself all those years. Solas the stylist, who'd have thought?”
Solas laughed and put his hand on her shoulder. “Ah yes, you've discovered my secret! And here I thought I'd hidden it so well. You must promise not to tell anyone or the whole of Skyhold will be knocking at my door.”
“Your secret is safe with me vhenan.” She looked up at him and smiled. Her heart felt lighter, she hadn't known how much this was weighing on her until it was out in the open. She had no answers but that didn't matter. It was like her Keeper always told her when he suspected her of having secrets, the heaviest burden is the one that you carry alone.
Solas was smiling back at her, seemingly pleased with both his work and her change in mood. He leaned down and kissed her forehead, taking her cheek in his hand. Then he rested his forehead against hers. “Just focus on what's in front of you. You will find your place in this world ma vhenan, of that I have no doubt.”
“Mmm, I think I can do that.” she said, leaning forward and gently kissing him. “Thank you for this Solas, I think I really needed to talk about it.”
His thumb stroked carefully her cheek as if she were a beautiful illusion, afraid that if he were too rough she'd disappear. “Anything for you vhenan.”