Chapter Text
The titans were coming, their plane was wrecked, their fuel was spilled and soon they will all be burnt by the titans. Hange was devastated, this was happening because she was weak, she was blaming herself, she cannot accept the fact that the reason why they were going to get trampled was because she forced her comrades to fight. That, of course was not the truth it was just some petty overthinking that goes to Hange ever since she was deemed commander of the Survey Corps by Erwin.
"So, why don't you get in?" She said to her comrades as she stayed to help put the fuel into the plane. "I'll go with Yelena and Annie to try and stop the colossal titans." She said as she fixed Levi's bandage in his face that went askew . "We'll be standing at the hangar's roof so we will be high enough to launch the thunder spears, god! I'll be so cool Levi, wait for my return alright?" She aid as she laughed trying to stop the tears that were forming in her eyes. This was it, she's going to sacrifice her life for the good of everyone. If she were being honest with herself this is not how she wanted to go. She wanted to listen to her selfish desires and instincts and just stay inside the plane with the others, but she can't do that, she is their leader and she would protect them till the end. Was it really the others she was trying to protect? Or was it just a certain person who is now limp and cannot move a single bone in his body without feeling pain?
"Oi, four eyes. Hurry up and go back here after they filled the fuel's tank alright?" Levi said as he went near her. "Don't let yourself get hurt over there or I will pull you from the afterlife myself and burn you alive" Levi jokingly said with his usual cold voice. "Yeah, yeah sure." Hange said as she laughed, she was about to turn around when Levi pulled her back and since they were just around the same height and Levi was looking down she cannot see how he looks right now. "Dedicate," he said as he paused and sighed. "Your heart, and come back to me." He said as he placed his hand in her heart. Devastated. That was what Hange felt, she was going to leave him. She hated it, she doesn't want to go, she just wanted to run away with him in the forest and grow old with him. Levi and her, they weren't in a romantic kind of relationship to say the least but she loved him, more than a comrade, she doesn't know how he feels and maybe she'll never know. Because this was her end, and she can't tell him how she feels because she would stay back if she did, and she can't. "Of course! We'll live in the forest right! Later, Levi!" she said as she laughed and turned around. "Get inside, leave the engines to Onyankopon and the others, no one will titanize I will, try and stop them." Hange said with finality as she placed her cape,no, Levi's cape into her shoulders. "This is goodbye I guess? Don't tell Levi with what I'm bound to do. That old man will try and stop me which we all know he can't." She said as she laughed. "It has been a good run right everyone, I wish I could stay but I must do this you know." she said as she looked up to try and stop the tears.
"And, Armin Arlelt, I make you the 15th commander of the Survey corps. Levi's your underling now boss him around as you can." She said as she laughed. "See you around guys!" Hange enthusiastically said as she flew to the roof then flew above the colossal titans. She just has to take down those that are upfront, that was just it. She killed her 3rd titan when she felt it. "Shit! It hurts" She said as she felt her skin burn. This was it, she was going to die. She was going to die with a lot of regrets and she hates it. She killed her last titan as she felt herself fall. Then everything blacked out.
Hange woke up and when she did she saw Moblit and the others. It was peaceful, it was solemn and warm and she likes it. But why? Why does her heart feel heavy? Why is it that despite her being in total peace and solitude she was still longing for someone. This is not how someone should feel in the afterlife. She wants to be free of her burden and regrets. But why can't she? "Hange? You alright" Erwin asked as they sat beneath a tree. "I told you I would listen right?" He continued as he stared at her. "I-I'm- I don't think I'm meant to be in here yet erwin." Hange said as she looked at her former commander and comrade. "I don't know I just feel like this wasn't it. This was not supposed to be my end, why am I feeling this way?'' Hange asked as she felt tears again stinging in her eyes. "Because you don't want to Hange," Erwin said. "When I died I came to peace with it, I was glad and happy, I lead you to the truth about the basement and I was free of all the burdens and deaths that I've caused. But you Hange," He said as she took her hand in his. "You do not want to leave yet, my reason why I wanted to stay was to see the basement, and I did, Hange, I did, I saw it, I was watching over all of you and I was glad. Finally humanity is a step closer to the truth again." Erwin said as he felt himself smile remembering how peaceful and happy he felt because he finally can rest. His job was done, but that was not Hange's case because-
"But, that's not your case isn't it Hange?" He said as he stared directly at her. "You can't find peace because your job and your wish was not to die heroically, you wanted to stay with him." He said. "You wanted to stay with Levi." He stated truthfully and not as a question. Hange guiltily looked down. She was ashamed because of her selfish desire.
It was stupid and she knows it. But she just can't go like that. "I promised him. I promised him that I will come back to him without harm Erwin!" She yelled at him as she kneeled and cried. "I wanted-, I wanted to protect him and stay with him Erwin!" She yelled as she fisted the grass beneath her. "I'M SELFISH AND I'M CRUEL BUT THAT'S WHAT I WANT ERWIN, I WANTED TO TELL LEVI HOW I FEEL. I WANT." she stopped as more sobs came out of her throat."i want to go back to him." she whispered while crying."Then go back to him, Hange." Erwin said as she looked at his crying friend. "I am happy that you're here Hange but I guess it's not your time yet." Erwin stated as he pulled Hange up to stand. "Wake up, Hange. And go back to him. We will continue watching over you." Erwin said as Hange's sight blackened and she can't see anything but white and black.
Her body feels terrible and painful. She feels her back burning and she feels her left arm burning as well. "HANGE-SAN" a female voice yelled but she can't hear who it was but then suddenly she was swallowed by a beast and brought somewhere.
It was terrible in the beast's mouth, but her wounds don't seem to painful and she can't understand why. She was then let out of the mouth and she felt like she can't breath. She felt her chest being pushed back till she breath. She coughed out and try to hold her chest but did not continue with it as she felt pain again."Hange-san!" a voice yelled and a face came to her view. "A-annie?" she tried saying but ended up as a low whisper. "How is she?" a deep man's voice came and looked through her peripheral vision. Zeke Yeager stepping out of his titan. Hange squirmed from Annie's grasp as she tried to move away from Zeke. "Oh, hey don't move just yet, Hange." the man said as he pulled her up and carried her inside the ship. She then felt being laid on a bed . "Hange-san I'm going to clean your wounds alright? This is going to be painful." Annie said as she then moved to medicate Hange's wound. Hange felt too much pain that she just started drifting off to sleep. "I'm alive." she thought as she felt herself succumb into the darkness.