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The bell above the door of a cosy floral shop rang, notifying their workers that another customer came inside. A couple of polite greetings were directed towards the newcomer. One soft greeting was addressed back at them, accompanied by a small nod as the patron walked further inside.
The client was a tall man, around 190 centimetres for sure, with a head full of brown hair. His clothes contained out of a well-fitted black suit, a small brown leather belt, and matching brown shoes. His eyes scanned the flowers the store sold, skipping over the bouquets all together. He walked up to the roses once those were caught in his vision. His hands hovered over the colours, picking out a couple of roses each time he thought the shade was right.
The man looked around for a minute once he had enough roses to form a small bouquet. In the corner, he found them, flowers called Arum; faith and purity. He chose three of them, the same amount as the big green leaves he picked out afterwards.
With all the flowers he needed in hand, he walked over to the cashier. Careful hands placed them on the counter, asking the worker to turn it in a pretty bouquet. While the employee put it together, he pulled out his card, paying for the flowers.
"You've picked out gorgeous flowers, do you know what they mean?"
He gave the employee a small but soft smile as he took the bouquet out of their hands. "Yeah... Yeah, I do. That's why I specifically chose those," he answered them while looking at the flowers in his hands.
The worker looked between the flowers and the man; they gave him a small encouraging smile. "I'm sure that, whomever you got them for, appreciates them."
He looked them in the eyes when he received those words, and his smile widened by a fraction. "Thanks, I'm sure he does," he answered them back. He gave the employee a small nod as a farewell before he left the store.
A sigh escaped his lips as the nerves started to kick in. The flowers were clasped against his chest with his left hand. A shaking right hand made its way into his hair, pushing it further out of his face. He walked along the road at a slow pace despite his long legs.
At the encounter of a coffee shop, he decided to get two coffees to go. Both were placed into a steady paper bag that he took along on his short journey.
After another five minutes of walking, he was confronted by a hill. The grass was green, almost giving off a glow due to the sun. He used the stone staircase to get on top of it, following the path that met his figure there. Almost there.
He went downhill until he found the last stairs towards his destination. A shaky breath left his lungs before he stepped onto the stones, going further down. He couldn't back out now, he came too far already.
The pebbles crunched under his shoes as he got off the stairs. He walked a few more metres before he sat down on the grass, placing the paper bag next to him. A slightly trembling hand took out the coffees and put them in front of him. "One for me... And one for you," he mumbled alongside his actions.
"So, it's... It's been a while, hasn't it, my Zon?" he started off. "I've missed you, you know." His eyes were locked on his fidgeting hands. "How have you been doing?"
There was no response, however, so he took a sip of his coffee before he continued talking.
"I'm sorry that you haven't heard from me for some time now. I've been quite busy recently. You've actually inspired some songs that I created, I'll let you listen to those next time. I hope that you think they're adequate. I had decided to follow your advice, so I wrote the lyrics myself too." He shook his head lightly. "They're not as good as your writings, though."
Repetitive patterns were drawn in his palm by his thumb.
"To be honest, Zon... I haven't been doing that well," he said as he pulled up his knees to his chest. Arms wrapped around his shins, fingers continued their pattern making.
A shaky inhale was taken.
"I'm so... I'm so scared to wake up in the mornings." He let out a humourless chuckle. His nails started to dig into his hands, leaving red crescent shapes into his palms. He had to push through.
"I'm so scared to wake up in the morning now that I..." An annoyed huff left his lips as he noticed the waver in his voice. He inhaled sharply before continuing, "Now that I know I won't be waking up beside you anymore."
"I'm sorry..."
He forced his hands open so he could take his coffee cup in his hands again. It had started to cool down a lot since he bought it. A few gulps entered his system, lukewarm by now.
"You haven't even touched your coffee yet..." he said as he eyed the other cup. He knew that he was stalling so, even though finding it difficult to do, he continued to talk, "I, uh... So, whenever I wake up, I try to chase back into the dream world. That way I can search for your face, look for your smile. Find those perfect dimples of yours."
Tears started to form into his eyes as he spoke. His voice sounded wet, he cleared his throat, hoping the sound would change. It didn't.
"I do that because-" a sob escaped his mouth. "I do that because it's the only way I can ever see you anymore."
The back of his hands came in contact with his eyes, furiously trying to get rid of the tears. They didn't stop falling, however. Sobs rocked through his body. A hand fell down towards his mouth, trying to cover up the sounds he made.
After a few minutes of silence, only having his sobs break it once in a while, he stood up on shaky legs.
"Thank you, thank you for giving me your time of day." He dusted off his pants.
Just as he wanted to turn around, the realization hit him. "Ah! Before I forget, Zon," he picked up the flowers from the ground. "I got you some flowers," a soft voice said.
"They're uh... I've got you Arum, which means faith and purity. Those just reminded me of you. But I also got you three types of roses! The dark pink ones mean gratitude because I have a lot of that towards you. I'm thankful for the time you've spent with me, and for the love that you have given me. The white ones can mean wistfulness... That's because I yearn to be with you again. And, well, the black ones are obvious," he said as he put the bouquet down on the earth in front of him.
"They mean death and sorrow," he told the headstone with a small smile.
"I've had the best years of my life with you; I'll never forget you. I'll see you soon, okay? Take care, sweetheart. I love you, my Zon."