Chapter Text
Poe looked down at the cards in his hand. If he played this right - and he fully intended to - he would win the game in record time.
“So Poe…” Rose started as she put a green three card on the pile. “Finn tells me you’re up for a promotion.”
“Yep,” Poe nodded as he put a green seven down on top of Rose’s card. “Can’t wait to do double the work for slightly more pay.”
Not that he wasn’t already doing double the work. Ever since his disastrous break up, Poe had thrown himself into his job, logging more billable hours than anyone else at his company and getting the attention of upper management.
“Anyone new in your life?” Finn asked with a conspiratorial glance at Rose as he put a red seven on the pile.
“You already know the answer to that,” Poe sighed.
“We’re just worried about you,” Rose said as she played a red four.
“Look, I appreciate the concern, I really do, but I’m fine and you can really stop using game night as an excuse to check in on me,” Poe insisted as he played a color change card down along with a blue five. “Uno.”
“It was just so sudden,” Rose commented, looking over at the empty fourth chair.
“It was sudden for me too, Rosie, but there’s nothing I can do about it now.”
That was the trouble of dating someone you met in a friend group as tight as theirs. Finn and Poe worked at the same company and had struck up an immediate friendship when put on an assignment together. Rose was Finn’s longtime girlfriend, and Rey… Rey was something else entirely. Rey and Finn had been friends since she moved to the United States in high school. Poe had been captivated by her from the instant he saw her. She was intelligent, beautiful, charming, didn’t back down from a challenge and wasn't afraid to call Poe out on his shit.
They’d spent the better part of two years exchanging stolen glances, touches here and there, and hugs that always lasted a little too long to be friendly. Finally it came to a head, each drunkenly confessing their feelings for each other at a party. From there came the best year and a half of Poe’s life. He was amazed at how natural it was to be dating Rey. How well she fit into his life, how his dog seemed to love her just as much as he did. Any time they were together, even doing something mundane like watching TV on the couch or making dinner together, Poe marveled at how right it felt. He knew almost immediately that this was who he wanted to spend the rest of his life with and he couldn’t wait to give her his mother’s ring.
But, as Poe often found, good things can only last for so long, and 18 months into the relationship it all came crashing down around him.
Rey had been away on a work trip the week of her birthday, so to make it up for it, he cooked her favorite meal when she came back. It had all been going smoothly, they were sitting on his couch and he had just given her the gift he’d gotten her.
“What is this?” Rey frowned as she looked down into the box.
“It’s a key to the apartment,” Poe explained, reaching over to take it out. “So you can come and go whenever you want.”
“Poe, I…” Her eyes began to water. At the time Poe thought she was touched by his gesture. Looking back on it, he should have said something other than what he did. Or at the very least said nothing at all.
“I love you, Sunshine,” Poe declared.
“I can’t,” Rey whispered, tears streaming down her cheeks.
“Can’t what, sweetheart?” Poe asked nervously.
“I can’t do this anymore.” Rey handed Poe the box, wiping her eyes with the backs of her hands and got up from the couch.
“You can’t what?? The relationship?” Poe held onto Rey’s hands so she couldn’t run away. She said nothing but her nod was enough to convey what she meant.
“So do you just want to stop?” Poe asked, hoping it was just some sick joke. “Do you want to break up?”
Rey opened and closed her mouth a few times before sighing and nodding again. Poe let go of her hands as if they’d had burned him. Rey whispered an apology but Poe barely registered what she said as he fell back down against the couch. Bee, his corgi, ran to the door in pursuit of Rey, barking as it closed in front of him. He then padded over to jump on the couch next to Poe, putting a paw on his owner’s leg.
“I know, buddy, I’ll miss her, too.” Poe stared straight at the wall, absentmindedly scratching behind his dog’s ear as he tried to think of what came next.
Poe tried reaching out to Rey, but after several texts and calls went unanswered it became blatantly obvious she’d blocked him and it really was over for good.
“Can you just play a card already so I can put mine down and win the game?!” Poe just about snapped at Rose.
“Fine,” Rose tapped the top of several cards before placing a blue reverse card on top of the pile.
She was clearly just doing it to get a rise out of him, but Poe refused to give her the satisfaction. He had a card left that could be played on anything, and even if they were playing keep away to stop him from using it, they would likely run out of reverse cards before getting to his turn.
“Thanks babe,” Finn grinned before playing a card Poe had never seen before.
“Draw 25 or call/text your most recent ex,” Poe read aloud. “What the hell is this?!”
“New UNO pack.” Finn lifted up the box. “There are blank cards now that you can fill out to make the games more interesting.”
“And this is what you chose?!” Poe quirked an eyebrow. “What if I had gotten it? Would either of you be okay contacting your exes?!”
“You don’t have to call her, you know.” Rose noted with a casual shrug. “You always have the option to draw 25 cards.”
Poe frowned, seriously weighing his options. He was so close to winning and there was no way he could come back if he had to take 25 extra cards. Was winning a card game really worth it? Then again, he had hooked up with another ex a few months ago. Technically she wasn’t his most recent ex, but she was the ex he was with most recently... that could work, right?
“Zorii Bliss does not count,” Rose said before he could even float the idea and Poe mentally kicked himself for telling Rose about it.
After taking a few more seconds to consider it, Poe pulled out his cell phone. He had been blocked for almost a year, the text would probably never even be read.
Typing out a quick message about his dog, he hit the send button and shared the screen to his friends. “Satisfied?”
Poe played his draw four card to end the game, getting up and putting his jacket on before Finn or Rose could say anything else.
“Let us know if she answers!” Finn called out.
“Wouldn’t count on it, buddy,” Poe responded as he stepped out of their apartment.
It took all of Poe’s strength not to check his phone at every crosswalk on his way to his car or every red light on his drive home. When he finally crossed his threshold, he gave in and, just as he had predicted, there was nothing.
The next day, Poe checked his phone first thing upon waking up. He admonished himself for getting his hopes up about someone who hadn’t messaged him in months and probably wouldn’t be messaging him today either. Still, that didn’t stop him from wondering if maybe this time would be different. Finn and Rose were still in contact with Rey and they were the ones encouraging, nay goading, him into initiating contact. Would they really do that if they knew he wasn’t going to get an answer?
Poe spent the rest of the day trying to distract himself with every errand he could think of: cleaning his apartment, walking his dog, going grocery shopping, Skyping with his dad…
Everytime his phone buzzed, Poe rushed over to look at the screen, hating himself for the disappointment he felt when it wasn’t Rey’s response.
He was just about to give up, call it a night and go to bed early, when his phone buzzed again.
Rey: I miss him too
He had texted her that his dog missed her, figuring that was the safest thing he could say given how he still felt about the breakup.
Choosing to strike while the iron was hot, and before he lost his nerve, Poe typed out a quick response and sent it.
Poe: So you’ll respond to a text about my dog but not one about me?
It would probably get him blocked again but it was worth it.
Rey: That’s fair
Poe was just about to respond when he got another text from her.
Rey: I understand if you say no, but would you maybe want to meet up tomorrow? Starbucks on third at 2 PM?
Poe weighed his options. Part of him wanted to say no, or better yet, to not respond at all and give her a taste of her own medicine. It would have probably been satisfying in the moment, but he knew he would regret it in the long run.
Poe: Sure, see you then.
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The next day, Poe made it a point to get there ten minutes late, just to keep her on her toes. Stopping at the front of the cafe, he glanced in and saw her sitting on one of the couches, two cups of coffee in front of her, looking around nervously. Rey was wearing a green dress he hadn’t seen before and her hair was shorter, but she looked as beautiful as ever. Poe sighed, rubbing the back of his neck before walking in.
“Poe!” Rey stood up as soon as she saw him, smiling. He had known it would be difficult to see her again, he just hadn’t anticipated how difficult it would be. “Thank you for coming.”
She reached out to hug him but stopped herself, rubbing her forearms instead.
“I’m here,” Poe confirmed with a tight smile.
“Let’s sit, please.” Rey sat on the couch, lifting a coffee cup to Poe. “I got your favorite.”
“Thanks.” Poe sat down before taking the cup.
An awkward silence fell over them. They stared at each other, not knowing quite what to say, just looking around and taking sips from their coffee cups. At a certain point, Poe grew fed up with the silence.
“So, who talks first? I talk first, you talk first?” Poe waved a hand around. “It’s just hard to tell with the whole, awkward silence.”
Rey rolled her eyes, albeit smiling. “Good to see you still have your sense of humor.”
Poe chuckled dryly before sighing and putting his cup down. “Look, I’m glad you wanted to meet up in person to clear the air, but why should I believe you? I opened my heart to you and you broke it.”
“You’re right.” Rey looked down, picking at the sleeve around her coffee cup. “You don’t have any reason to trust or believe me. And I promise, if you never want to speak to me after today, I’ll respect that. I just knew I owed you an explanation after how I left things.”
“Alright.” Poe leaned back against the couch. Despite his anger, he was willing to hear her out fairly.
“I’m sure Finn told you about my ex-boyfriend.” Rey started. Yes, Finn had mentioned something to Poe but didn’t give many details, always insisting it was Rey’s story to tell when the time was right.
“We started dating not long after I began working at his mum’s office. It was great at first. He was older than me, which led to some whispers, but we didn’t care.
“As soon as he gave me a key to his apartment, things took a turn. He expected me to be at his place anytime I wasn’t at work. He had his friends over all the time and would laugh as they made lewd comments about us that made me feel uncomfortable. Meanwhile, I was never allowed to have friends over, let alone see my own friends outside of the apartment. I would go weeks without seeing or even talking to Finn.
“Whenever I tried to break things off, he would profess his love for me, promising up, down, left, and right that he would change but he never did. I barely got away from him but swore I would never put myself in that type of situation again.
“I knew you weren’t him,” Rey clarified, brushing away a stray tear. “You’re one of the best people I’ve ever met and the best boyfriend I ever had. When you gave me that key and told me you loved me, I wanted nothing more than to take it, to tell you that I loved you too. But there was a louder voice in my head. One that couldn’t help but remind me of how things went the last time I got an apartment key and that I should run. I never wanted to hurt you, but I was scared and dealing with unresolved issues.”
“Rey…” Poe scrubbed a hand over his mouth, voice caught in his throat. “I’m so sorry you had to go through all of that.”
No wonder she was terrified. He was eight years her senior, offering her a key to his apartment, and professing his love when she was clearly uncomfortable? He may as well have been a carbon copy of her ex at that moment.
“I spent the last few months in therapy,” Rey revealed, reaching out to touch Poe’s hand. “When I left that day I realized I couldn’t run from it anymore. That even if we never spoke again, this was something I needed to do for myself.”
Poe looked up at her as he turned his hand around so they were holding hands, brushing his thumb over her knuckles. “I’m really proud of you.”
“Thank you,” Rey blushed.
They sat in silence for a few minutes, holding hands as they drank their coffees.
“So…” Rey started as she pulled her hand back to pick at the coffee sleeve again. “What now?”
Poe opened his mouth to respond but before he could get any words out, Rey continued. “Because I would do just about anything to get a second chance. If you were willing to give me one, that is.”
Poe sighed and chuckled lightly. “I think we should work on being friends again and see where we go from there. Take things slow. One step at a time.”
“One step at a time.” Rey smiled, repeating the phrase.