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It all started with a cough.
Or more accurately, it all started when Thomas’s heart sped up when he saw the most beautiful man he had ever seen walk by him on the street.
Then he… walked into a pole face first.
The pain had been manageable, after all, the beautiful man had ran back to him after supposedly hearing him smack into the pole. Thomas had wondered how the man hadn’t noticed the raging inferno that was his face, but that all faded away as the man brought him to his partner, who introduced himself as Remy to be patched up.
Right then and there all of the hopes that had been building up in the back of his mind came crashing down. But that didn’t mean he didn’t agree to come to the man’s, who introduced himself as Emile, house. It was only polite.
Only, it got so much worse. Thomas was so incredibly awkward and he had no idea why neither of them had thrown him out of house the moment he smacked into something yet again. But neither of them did.
“You’re slamming into a bunch of things, are you sure you’re okay?” Emile had asked, concerned when Thomas had fallen to the ground after running into the door frame.
Thomas had waved both Emile and Remy off with a, “I’m fine maybe I’m just tired. Maybe… I should go home…”
“Oh you can rest here if you’d like, I have no idea how far you live and I wouldn’t want you to have to walk back without a coat, cause tonight’s gotten pretty chilly.” Emile had said with a smile.
And only then at the utter vision of Emile’s radiant and smiling face did Thomas achingly cough.
However, Thomas had played the cough off as one borne from tiredness and acquiesced to the offer. He never saw the expression of Emile and Remy when he settled down on the couch, of confused surprise. But neither of them said anything as they sat nearby, quietly having a mumbled conversation as Thomas drifted off to the sound, suddenly exhausted. And the feeling of fingers running through his hair as he succumbed was surely just his own imagination.
But when he woke up in the dark, barely able to stifle a cough as it pushed it’s way past his lips, his heart sank. He could rationalize one cough, but as the sensation of something in his lungs was brought to the forefront, he knew he couldn’t rationalize that away.
He had Hanahaki.
Of course he did.
And Emile could never find out, he already had a boyfriend, how could Thomas force him to choose?
They’re happy, so I have to be okay with it. Thomas had thought
That was why he got up from the couch, eyes widening when he saw that Emile was still there, but the sounds of his steady breathing told Thomas he was asleep. That was why he had slipped past Emile, the man nearly stirring as Thomas creaked a floorboard on his way out the door.
That was why he went out shivering into the night, not leaving a note or anyway for Emile to find him again, because it was for the best he did not let himself or Emile get attached or have any way to find each other again.
And that was why he wasn’t there when Emile started coughing and crying out meekly for his queerplatonic partner in his sleep.
Coughing just like Thomas.