Chapter Text
It wasn't that Trafalgar Law was incapable of loving. He just chose not to, for the most part.
He grew up as a child with a loving family, a future, a faith, and a happy town of people. Although he had always been a bit of an outcast amongst kids his age, (most likely from his fascination with performing experiments on frogs which creeped out the other kids), he'd always come home to a mother, father and sister who accepted and supported him. And he didn't mind being a little different; he believed in himself, he loved studying medicine, and dreamed of becoming a doctor like his parents.
When he lost everything however, he quickly realised that he was incredibly lucky to have had what he'd had for so long. He realised the world wasn't the comfortable place he'd been living in up until this point in his life; the real world was a cruel place with no mercy that could destroy someone’s life in a second. He could never have what he once had ever again. He thought he’d learnt his lesson the first time he experienced a major life tragedy, but found himself growing to care for another person who was again taken from him, Corazon. Law realised love was an incredible vulnerability and weakness. The most strategic thing Law could do to move forward and get what he wanted was to never love anyone again. He would get his revenge on Doflamingo and he'd do whatever it took to do so. He would feel nothing as he took one hundred hearts from pirates in order to become Shichibukai. His crew would ironically be named the Heart Pirates, in memory of Corazon, but the Captain of the crew wouldn't have one. He hated to think he'd picked up the personality traits of Doflamingo, but as much as he hated the man, he learnt a lot about how to be a heartless bastard from him and reveled in it.
At least, this was Law's intention.
But human beings aren't that simple, they can't just be programmed like a machine.
He didn't want to get attached to the members of his crew as he started gathering the unruly outsiders into his group, they were just there to serve him, but inevitably they became the most important people to him. Law would always try to keep as much distance as possible to avoid attachment, but he couldn't control his own heart that easily. He still had one, after all.
When he allied with the Strawhats, it become increasingly more difficult to stay loyal to his ideal. It was just supposed to be about business. He saved Strawhat's life before, but he had his logical reasons for doing so, it wasn't out of compassion. But Monkey D. Luffy accepted Law into his friendship circle with open arms and Law was thrown into this bizarre group of pirates that felt more like a big group of friends & family on some cruise holiday than a pirate crew. Sure, his own crew could be quite expressive and emotional themselves, but the Strawhats were really on another level. There were times Law felt himself following along with their behaviours and acting in ways he rarely showed to even his own crewmates. Law had a soft and dorky side that lived within him his whole life despite how hard he tried to hide it. He hated how easily the Strawhats brought that side out of him.
While he did experience some feel-good moments with them and grew a bit of an attachment to them (which he’d never admit out loud), he definitely felt out of place amongst them and they didn't do a whole lot to ease his stress levels. He could only stand so much of the more energetic ones at a time before retreating to a quieter spot while temporarily partnering with them after Punk Hazard.
And at those times, a certain member of the crew began to catch his eye.
It was Pirate Hunter Roronoa Zoro, the other member of the Worst Generation on the Strawhat crew besides Strawhat himself. Despite doing his usual extensive research about the crew, it was very difficult to tell what kind of people the Strawhats were in real-life based on the gathered information in newspaper articles and Marine reports (which usually focused just on combat abilities, behaviours and crimes committed). He was apparently the first mate of the crew, but he didn’t seem to do a whole lot to step up to that role. He was kind of just quiet most of the time, he was often napping or drinking alcohol, and he often just wandered without really interacting too much with anyone. He seemed to be off in his own world or something. Law would watch him with curiosity out of the corner of his eye, trying not to let the man notice his glances. He already had a natural curiosity before he even saw Zoro at Saobody two years prior due to his infamous three-sword style, being a swordsman himself. Apart from that, Law felt pretty aware of all the other Supernova’s motivations and histories, as they didn’t try hard to hide a lot of it (quite the opposite in fact). But Roronoa’s motivations weren’t as obvious to Law, why a guy so seemingly independent and strong on his own would be so loyally following a crazy guy like Strawhat was the biggest mystery of all. All Law knew from Strawhat’s and Roronoa’s relationship was they seemed like very good friends, and Strawhat seemed to bring out another side of him (as he noticed after witnessing a rare chuckling Zoro when the two of them were together in Dressrosa).
But that certainly wasn’t the only thing about Zoro that had caught Law’s attention. Another thing was how undeniably attractive the man was. Well, he did notice it to begin with when first seeing his wanted posters, but he noticed it even more now seeing him in real life and up close. Despite a large scar running down the left eye, he had a pretty yet masculine face with pleasing features and three gold earrings hanging delicately on his left ear. He had an unusual colour of green hair that was short but flowed backwards on his head, resembling some kind of natural green foliage. His body was very muscular, much more than Law's, but he was still more on the lean side which showed a body built for agility as well as brute strength. And the way he wore his navy green gown previewed the cleavage of his chest, his collarbone and neck which sometimes made Law have a quick second glance. The way he talked with his deep voice and his aloof body language was somehow exuding in sex appeal, although it seemed completely unintentional.
But beyond mere aesthetic appreciation and professional curiosity, Law's feelings towards Zoro really started to begin the night after the victory in Dressrosa.
Law was exhausted, both mentally and physically. He felt extremely happy but also very empty. He'd lived most of his life to reach the point where he defeated Doflamingo. He was satisfied with having achieved a major life goal of his, but at the end of the day it didn't bring back Corazon. What Admiral Sengoku had said really shook him up. And it made him think about the man, and how he had loved him unconditionally. He couldn't describe the emotion. Sadness, happiness?
He was caught in his own head while everyone else was drinking and enjoying themselves, when a white-sleeved arm wrapped around him, bringing Law's head back into the present moment.
Law turned his head to his left side to see a bright smiling face below short green hair looking right back at him. The overly happy expression from the usually frowning swordsman was quite shocking to Law, that it took him a second to reassure that it was indeed Roronoa. Law's reaction to this was a mixture of his immediate reaction to anyone invading his personal space, along with his mind and body freaking out over the feeling of the body warmth and muscle movement of the man who he had been eyeing recently all over him. Despite trying to wriggle out of his grasp and giving him every non-verbal signal that he didn't want to be touched, Zoro had no intention of letting him go. He just continued to smile and drink his alcohol with his arm hooked around the Heart Pirate's Captain. His laughter was warm and loud in Law's ears, and he felt the vibration from his chest go through his left arm and shoulder. Law felt his face progressively get hotter and really hoped no-one noticed (though probably not since they were all red-faced with alcohol themselves). If Zoro didn't let go soon, Law would have to be more forceful. There was a part of Law that didn't want Zoro to let go of him at all and wanted to get even closer instead, but Law pushed those feelings down and aside for the time being.
After a few minutes of Law's protesting, Zoro finally responded to Law's signs of struggling and his hand loosened and fell off his shoulder, letting Law taste freedom. Law took a deep sigh of relief, though the sea air felt cool on the place Zoro's arm just was. Law thought Roronoa was finally done interacting with him for the night, but then he then turned to Law, face-to-face for the first time since they met in Punk Hazard.
"Sorry, man. Just wanted to make you feel more included. You came here alone without your crew, after all," Zoro smiled at him.
Law raised an eyebrow at him.
"Whatever," Law responded in his usual grumpy and blunt manner, and turned to face away from him again.
Zoro didn't take that as a hint to stop socialising with him, however; instead he went to grab another drink and passed it to Law.
"You should relax more! This is your victory!" he exclaimed with his deep and robust voice. Law reluctantly took the drink that was forced into his hands, sipping only a slight amount.
Zoro's eyes continued to waver on Law, observing him. Why is he looking at me like that, Law asked himself, starting to feel self-conscious.
"What's up with you?" he questioned, causing Law to look back at him in confusion. Law noticed Zoro's eye directed towards his right bandaged arm.
"Are you in a bad mood because your arm's hurting?"
"Its not that...," Law answered, understanding what he meant now. The man is pretty perceptive, thought Law; not only did he notice Law's arm had been badly damaged (despite not knowing it'd been removed and reattached just a short while ago), but he also noticed Law wasn't in a good mood (despite being a person who always seemed to be in a bad mood from the outside). But Law didn't want to start a conversation about his feelings. It was too deep and personal to talk about in this kind of environment. Not that he was the type of person who jumped at the opportunity to talk about his personal issues, anyway. Especially to someone he only became acquainted with a little while ago.
Zoro sensed Law didn't want to talk, and suddenly rose to his feet and said "Come on, let's go talk some place else."
Law being the stubborn man he was didn't really want to comply and follow him. But Zoro stared down at him, and it seemed like he wouldn't leave until Law went with him. Law didn't really want to stay alone amongst the drunken loud-mouthed pirates accidentally pushing into him every now and again, either. So, with a sigh, he grabbed his long sword Kikoku as he reluctantly rose to his feet and followed Zoro down to the much less crowded side of the ship.
Once they reached a more quiet area, Zoro walked up to and leant against the ship’s taffrail with one arm, his other arm preoccupied with holding his cup of alcohol. Law followed suit, leaving a comfortable (wide) gap between himself and the other pirate.
"So, is this a better place to tell me?" Zoro asked raising the drink to his lips.
Law was still hesitant to talk. But since they went through the effort of walking over here, and Law didn't really have anything better to do, he decided to just go ahead and say something.
"The defeat of Doflamingo was something I aspired to achieve for a long time, since I was young. We had a history..." Law began, as he stared out at the seemingly endless blue blanket of sea. "I... didn't plan to leave Dressrosa alive in all honesty. Although I am relieved, I expected to feel better about the man's defeat after everything he's done. And... I also met someone there who- Well... a lot of my past came back up and I just have a lot of complicated personal thoughts..." Law trailed off, fearing he’d said too much.
"I see..." Zoro nodded, pausing for a while to think. "Well, that's understandable. If you live your life dedicated towards a goal, especially for something like revenge, doesn't always feel so good at the end... But hey, you're still alive and you miss your crew, don't you? I'm sure you'll be glad to see them again."
"Yeah... That's right... I am looking forward to seeing them when we get to Zou," Law responded.
He glanced over to the other man. Zoro was looking out to the ocean's horizon line, his long eyelashes blowing slightly from the soft sea wind. A drop of alcohol that missed his mouth trickled down his muscular neck. The memory of that warm body pressed against him returned to Law's mind, still vivid and fresh as if he could almost still feel him. Law used all his might to pull his eyes away and look back onto the ocean before the man noticed the gaze on him.
Just as Law looked away, Zoro turned his head to the right to look toward Law. The taller and older man's eyes were looking intense and full of deep thought, as always, with dark lines under his eyes that made him look like he hadn't slept in days (though Zoro couldn't really tell if he had or not). His two earrings Zoro could see on his left ear glinted dimly, attached to ears under the large circular fluffy hat that rarely left the man's head. As Zoro's eye moved downwards, he could see black lines of tattoo ink creeping out onto his collar bone from under tightly wrapped fresh bandages on his torso with a slightly-toned front body still visible through the material.
During the party, Zoro had made the decision to sit beside and put his arm around the older swordsman. It wasn't something he normally did to a person he wasn't too familiar with unless they were willing, but for some reason he felt a kind of draw towards him. Perhaps it was because he looked out of place, looking so serious as others drank and laughed around him, a Captain without his own crew, and he wanted to make him feel more comfortable and included. Maybe it was the admiration and respect he gained for the man after seeing him willing to die for his mission in Dressrosa. Or it could be Zoro just thought it'd be amusing to mess around with him a bit since watching Luffy do the same was very entertaining. Zoro didn't really know, but as he usually does, he just listened to his heart and didn't think much about it.
And as he sat beside Law and wrapped his arm around him, he found himself enjoying the feeling of having him so close beside him and didn't want to let go of him. One didn't have to be a genius to notice Trafalgar was a very handsome man. Zoro found him to be... admirable. That's the word he chose to describe him. He was so admirable to Zoro in fact, that he found himself just wanting to stare at his good-looking face, dark eyes, slender but defined neck and torso, and dark olive skin for a while longer while he listened to his pleasing low but somewhat soft voice speak. Just Zoro's usual platonic feelings of appreciation towards another man.
Law turned to face Zoro, and caught his stare toward him. Zoro blinked at him as their dark grey eyes met eachother, then he quickly turned away. Law could have sworn he saw a pink blush on the younger pirate's face, but it was probably just wishful thinking.
"Anyway... I'm gonna go grab some more alcohol. I'll see you later," Zoro said, awkwardly patting Law lightly on his uninjured shoulder, as he walked off back to the bustling noisy part of the ship.
"Yeah sure," Law responded, looking over his shoulder as the white shirt and green hair of the Strawhat's vice captain disappeared.
Law turned his head back and continued to look out to the vast ocean on his lonesome (he didn't really want to rejoin the noisy commotion again and preferred to stay where he was). As Law looked ahead toward the horizon line with colours changing due to the setting sun, he noticed how much prettier the ocean looked than it normally did. He hadn't felt himself have appreciation for scenery in a long time. Perhaps it was because Law found himself thinking about things other than the burdensome things that had been on his mind for a while that had occupied his brain space most of the time. Thinking of things that made him finally appreciate the fact he had made it out of Dressrosa alive.
One of those things being the distraction by the name of Roronoa Zoro.