Chapter Text
Someone slinks into the room and flops down onto his bunk and on top of him. Fox snarls and rolls the both of them, throws them both off the bunk and to the ground. They grapple before he twists them, pins the body to the ground.
Ponds blinks up at him with a calm that Fox hasn’t felt for too long, infuriatingly steady and peaceful and something that might be understanding or pity but makes him furious.
Fox wants to punch him or rage at him with all he has. Meets that steady, even gaze and wants to scream.
There is nothing that is steady anymore. Nothing that’s right. And he is angry and full to the brim with it. Because Edee’s room has four bunks, has always had four bunks, and now only has three bodies to fill them. And he can’t fix it, had been so caught in the thought that he wasn’t good enough that he hadn’t seen the look on Priest’s fucking face.
He feels stupid and small and angry.
He has already tried to be mad at 6, but he hasn’t been able to hold onto it. Not when he’d thought the same thing 6 had, when Priest had come and demanded Neyo.
He thought that it would be easier to be mad at Ponds. And it is, but it doesn’t leach any of the anger from his heart, any of the venom from his bones.
Ponds shifts and Fox digs fingers into his side, vicious in his hurt. Ponds grunts, gets a grip on Fox’s wrist and squeezes tight.
Fox snarls, “The fuck are you doing here.”
Ponds shrugs, grip never lightening and wriggles in Fox’s grip, “Wanted to say hi.”
There is something ugly in Fox’s chest and he can’t quite swallow it back down, he snarls again, stands up and moves away with a snapped “You said your fucking hi, now get the fuck out.”
Ponds doesn’t let go, grips tighter and follows him. Fox turns, tackles him, and they scramble at each other until Fox bites at an arm that goes close enough to his mouth. Ponds hisses out a curse and Fox gnashes his teeth at him again until he let’s go.
“Get out Ponds.” He spits, and wants to scream when all Ponds does is raise an eyebrow.
“Colt and Gree are still on the sims.” Ponds says and Fox sits up, ignores him and picks himself up off the ground.
He doesn’t respond, turns around and waits for Ponds to get the hint and to leave him alone.
Ponds doesn’t, stays where he is, stubborn and nosy and annoying.
“Bly thought you’d all stick together, like you were the first few weeks,” Ponds says, and from the sound of it, he’s still laying down on the floor as if he doesn’t have a single care in the galaxy. Fox grits his teeth, sets his jaw and doesn’t turn to check.
He’ll only get angrier if he does.
“He thinks it’s weird Colt and Gree have been doing sims over and over and you’ve been moping in here and then doing sims until 6 stops you from passing out.” Ponds continues, and giving into the bloodied thing inside his chest is looking more and more appealing the longer he keeps talking.
He clenches his jaw tighter, closes his hands into fists so tight they shake.
“You’re angry.” Ponds observes and Fox snorts.
“Brilliant fucking job you figured it out, now get out and don’t make me fucking tell you again.”
There’s the sound of shifting and Fox turns around slowly, watches as Ponds sits up.
“Who’re you angry at though?” Ponds asks, face uncharacteristically serious.
Fox snarls, “Who do you fucking think, Neyo was stupid and got himself noticed and now he’s fucking gone. But you’re fine as long as you can keep your fucking annoying little shithead aren’t you? So get the fuck out and leave me alone.”
Ponds is silent, watchful, and Fox shifts, feels like there are insects under his skin, like Ponds is ripping everything he sees apart.
He never knew Ponds could do that before, could look like that. He wonders what it says about how he must look now, to pull that reaction out of him.
Ponds tilts his head, “You aren’t though, at least not anymore. Or else you would be cursing him out a lot more.”
Fox grins, venom and fury lining his teeth, “Because you know me so well.”
Ponds shrugs, doesn’t take the bait, “You’re more angry at yourself I think. And Colt and Gree aren’t doing well either.”
Fox breathes, opens his mouth to rip into Ponds and feels only the sudden tightness of his throat, the burning of his eyes and chest.
“Shut the fuck up.” He croaks out, furious and trembling with it even as he tries to clear his expression.
Ponds looks at him, hesitates and then nods.
Fox turns around, walks to his bunk and throws himself down on it, counts his breathing as he tries to even it, gets steadily more furious as it only worsens.
There’s a weight on his back, steady and grounding. Ponds lays down on top of him and eventually Fox manages to match the rise and fall of his own chest to Ponds. Ponds keeps his word, doesn’t talk anymore, just taps at his side and wrestles him to his side, curls around Fox and twines their legs together.
The anger in his chest is still a loud, bloodied thing, and he still can’t forgive himself or 6, is still quietly furious and raging at everything about Kamino that lead to Neyo being stolen away.
There is no fixing that though, so Fox lets Ponds keep his grip and fights back the emotions he doesn’t want to be feeling right now, lets himself sleep.
(He doesn’t go to extra Sims that day, doesn’t run himself to the ground to do better. Thinks to himself instead, after he wakes up and Ponds goes back to his own shared room, about how to keep what is left of Edee safe.
Looks at the bloodied, poisonous, sharpened anger inside of him and decides to use it for something useful, instead of pushing his last two brothers away.
He won’t let anyone take another Edee away from him, not again.)