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Peter grabbed his deodorant and shoved it into a small duffel bag with his clothes, a nervous excitement filling his stomach. May was called into work all weekend, and Tony had offered to let Peter stay with them so he wouldn’t be alone. Tony hadn’t said anything, but Peter was pretty sure he and May had talked about the nightmares Peter had been having lately, and Tony didn’t want him to be alone at night.
It was rather sweet, even if a little embarrassing to feel like he was being babysat, and Peter wasn’t going to turn down a chance to hang out with the Starks. He loved Morgan and Pepper, and had especially missed lab days with Tony.
“Don’t forget your toothbrush,” May called from down the hall, breaking into Peter’s thoughts.
Peter rolled his eyes but checked to make sure he had actually put it into the bag. Sure enough, he found it sticking out the side. “I got it, May.”
May appeared in the doorway. “Just making sure, honey. You excited?”
Peter laughed. “It’s just a weekend at the Starks. It’s not like I haven’t been there before.”
May gave him a look.
“Yeah, okay. I’m always excited to hang out with Tony, Pepper, and Morgan.”
Peter’s phone rang, Happy’s face lighting up the screen.
“He’s here. I love you May!” Peter grabbed his bag, kissed May’s cheek, and answered the call as he headed out the door. “Hey, Happy. I’m on my way down. See you in a minute!” He chirpped into his phone.
“Okay. See you soon.” Never one for many words, Happy hung up, and Peter flew to the elevator, anxious to get to the lake house.
***
“Underoos!” Tony called as he swept out the front door, his arms open.
Peter willingly ran into them, relishing in his mentor’s warmth and closeness. He never ceased to be amazed that hugs had become an actual thing, and that Tony’s good hand carding through his curls felt like the most natural thing in the world. Despite the warmth of the hug and Peter’s thick sweater, the November air was chilly, and he shivered.
“Alright, let’s go inside. I forget you can’t thermoregulate. How’s the heater in your suit working, by the way? You aren’t getting cold on patrols, are you?”
They headed inside, and Peter melted as soon as he stepped through the door. The warmth of the house, combined with the comforting colors of fall decorations and the scent of a candle Pepper had lit, seeped through the cold to warm his entire soul. It was a magical feeling. Peter smiled and took a deep breath before turning to his mentor.
“No, Tony. It works great. Karen would alert you if it didn’t, right?”
Tony narrowed his eyes. “See, I would normally say yes, but after the stunt you pulled in DC, I don’t really know anymore.”
“Well, then,” Peter scoffed, “you’ll just have to trust me when I say I haven’t, and I won’t, mess with her again.”
“Yeah, that’s the problem. I don’t trust you with that.”
Peter pulled out his most potent puppy-dog eyes.
“Oh, now that’s not fair.” Tony glared as Peter grinned, entirely unrepentant.
“Boys, play nice!” Pepper called from the kitchen, and Peter went over to give her a hug. “Are you hungry, sweetheart? Dinner will be ready in about 15 minutes.”
Tony kissed Pepper’s cheek as he passed to the fridge to grab a water bottle. “Want me to go get her majesty? Have her wash up?”
“No, I’ll go get Morgan. Where’s she at? I was surprised I wasn’t immediately accosted when I walked in,” Peter said, his smile too indulgent and full of love for the comment to hold any real heat.
Pepper nodded her head to the back door. “In her tent, playing with her Spider-Man action figures, actually.”
Peter blushed, trying to hide it as he headed out the back door to get his little sister. He stopped right outside her tent. “Morgan! Guess who!” he called.
“Petey!” Morgan yelled as she flew out of the tent and into Peter’s open arms.
“Hey Momo!” he said, kissing her head. “It’s time for dinner. Your mom wants you to wash up.”
“What’s for dinner?” Morgan asked cautiously, preemptively wrinkling her nose as if she already didn’t like the answer.
“I don’t know, but it looked like spaghetti.”
Deeming the answer to her satisfaction, Morgan allowed Peter to take her inside.
“I hear you have some Spider-Man action figures, Mo,” he said as he moved the stool so she could reach the sink with practiced motions.
“Yeah! I have 5! Daddy got me one for every year you were gone. He’d always tell me stories about you. I made him use my action figures to make it more fun.”
Peter firmly kept the smile on his face, though the mention of his 5-year absence made his stomach squirm annoyingly.
He hated feeling so fragile. Nobody else really talked about it, the feeling of turning into dust, the strange sensation of dread and pain and just….slipping away. It felt so unfair that the very DNA that gave him the ability to help others and to heal himself was the very thing that made coming back so much harder for Peter. Everybody else had just painlessly faded away, but Peter had felt everything.
Peter shook his head, turning his attention back to his sister. He turned off the water and handed her a towel, laughing as water droplets scattered on the wall from her erratic hand drying. The mundane detail made Peter smile, and he took a deep breath to dispel the lingering gloominess.
Dinner was nice. Conversation flowed easily between them all, and the knot of anxiety in Peter’s chest unraveled a little. He felt even better after tinkering in the lab with Tony. With AC/DC softly in the background, they spent hours in the basement lab, working on Peter’s web shooters and Tony’s prosthetic arm, and just generally enjoying each other’s company until Pepper came and made them go to sleep. By the end of the night, Peter felt better than he had in months.
He didn’t have any nightmares that night.
***
The next day was a beautiful, fall day. It passed in a blur of helping Pepper around the house, playing outside with Morgan, and spending hours in the lab with Tony again.
As he helped her, Pepper told him stories of Morgan as a baby, which were adorable, and stories of Tony as a new dad, which were somehow even more adorable. He hadn’t felt like he ever found his place with Pepper, but they talked as easily that day as they had the night before and some of his worries about where he stood with her melted a little.
It had been a similar experience with Tony. While Morgan fit seamlessly into his life, it had taken a lot longer before Peter and Tony had developed their relationship. Months of occasional phone calls had escalated to daily texts which led to lab nights that ended in movies and snuggles. Without even realizing it, they had forged a relationship that was akin to the one Peter had with his dad and Ben. It didn’t replace those relationships; the place in Peter’s heart simply expanded to make space for Tony. He hoped it would eventually be the same with Pepper..
***
“Alright kiddo,” Tony said the next night. “Monopoly? Uno? One of those new fangled games...uh...Cover Your Assets?”
“Ooooh. What’s Cover Your Assets?” Peter asked, walking over from the table, where he was stuffing his face with chips and salsa.
Morgan was asleep, and the adults were settling in for a game night. Popcorn, ice cream, and chips and dip had been procured in copious amounts.
“It's, uh, well you try and steal each other’s cards and get the most ‘money’. Let’s play it. It’s fun, and it’ll make more sense after you actually play a few rounds.”
“Yeah, I like that one. Let’s play it!” Pepper called, bringing a bowl of popcorn to the table. The third one. She’d insisted that she knew her boys and that she wanted to actually eat some popcorn, so they would each get their own bowl.
"Yeah, only because you beat me every game," Tony grumbled, earning him a slap from Pepper. He briefly explained the rules again and then dealt everyone in, and soon they were all engrossed in a very intense game. Peter proved to be a match for even Pepper, but he was pretty sure it was beginners luck.
“Tony, Peter literally has all the silvers in that stack, yet you steal from me! ” Pepper yelled. She turned out to be surprisingly competitive, and it amused Peter to no end.
“Pep, he probably has another silver to block it, I’m just biding my time!”
Peter hid a giggle behind his cards, then smugly stole Pepper’s pile from Tony, covering his stack with all the silvers.
“Son of a-“
Tony was cut off by a small voice. “Daddy?”
Morgan stood in the kitchen entryway with tears in her eyes, holding her iron man plushie in one hand, her Spider-Man blanket in another. She’d never looked younger.
“Yes, baby. What‘s wrong?”
“I had a bad dream,” she sniffled. “You...you died again.”
Peter’s heart dropped and the world fell away, sucked into a tiny pinpoint by his thundering heartbeat and ragged breaths. He desperately tried to bring the world back into focus. He was barely aware of Tony standing to scoop Morgan up into his arms, and forced himself to think of that and not his raging thoughts. Mercifully, it worked.
“Well, don’t you worry about that,” Tony was saying, and Peter clung onto his words like a lifeline and was finally able to suck in a breath of precious air. “Let’s go snuggle until you feel better, and I’ll have a little chat with your dreams, okay? Pete was going to win anyway.”
Morgan giggled as she wiped her eyes, laying her head down on her dad’s shoulder. Peter gasped in another breath, earning him a look from Pepper, but Peter schooled his expression enough to look normal.
“Sorry about that,” she said and squeezed his hand.
Peter managed a smile, steadying his breaths and willing the last vestiges of his panic to go away. “It’s really okay. I’m glad he’s able to help her.”
Soon Tony joined them once again. “She’s back asleep. A few snuggles from dad, and she was fine,” he said, preening just a little.
They continue their game, but Peter found his mind pulled away again, wrenched into a world far, far away where his body was torn apart while desperately trying to hold it together. That, or the horrible moment where he heard Tony’s heart stop on that battlefield.
“Kid, you okay?” Tony’s voice once again broke through the static in his brain, and he looked up to see both Starks staring at him with concerned expressions.
“Yeah. Just tired, I think,” Peter lied; mistake number one. “I think I’ll head to bed after this game.” Mistake number two.
Peter ended up winning, creaming the others and gloating about it like a 5-year-old, and then bid them goodnight. He knew they didn’t believe that he was really okay, but they didn’t press for answers and Peter didn’t give them. Instead, he dragged himself up the stairs to his room and got ready for bed.
He hesitated for a second before closing the door firmly behind him. And that was mistake number three.
***
“Do you think Peter’s okay?” Tony asked, bringing the last of the dishes over to the sink where Pepper was washing them.
She gave him a look full of fond exasperation, one he had become too familiar with, and handed him a washcloth to wipe the table. “You worry too much. Peter will be alright. If he wanted to talk about it, he would. He’ll come to you, and you will be there just like you always are.”
“You’re right as always, Pep.” Tony sighed, trying to shake the worry as he methodically swiped up and down the table, brushing the crumbs into his hand.
“Why don’t you go for a drive, Tony. You’ll feel better,” Pepper suggested. “We’re out of milk and eggs anyway. Peter can drink a whole gallon by himself.”
“Hmmmm. That’s a good idea. I’ll head to the store. Let me know if we need anything else, or if Peter wakes up. He’s been having nightmares, too.”
“We’ll be fine. Go. Clear your head, get some eggs and milk, come back, and let’s go to bed.”
“Fine, I’m going, I’m going.”
Tony rinsed the cloth, then slipped on his shoes and out the back door. Pepper heard the rumble of his favorite car a few seconds later as she put away the last plate. With a quiet moment to herself, she sank into the couch with the book she had been trying to finish for months. She didn’t get far, though.
“Mrs. Potts-Stark,” Friday chirped from the ceiling not even a second after she’d finally sat down, eliciting a loud groan.
“Yes, Friday?”
“Mr. Parker seems to be in distress. I believe he is having a nightmare.”
Pepper was instantly up off the couch, flying to Peter’s room without a second thought. She quietly opened the door, letting the soft light from the hallway illuminate the room. In the dim light, she saw Peter thrashing on the bed, his legs tangling with the sheets, and he was whimpering loud enough for her to hear. It broke her heart.
“Peter,” she called, walking over and kneeling next to the bed. “Peter. Wake up, sweetie. You aren’t alone, I promise. You’re safe, Tony is safe. C’mon. Wake up.” She kept whispering to him until he opened his eyes with a sob. “Oh, Peter,” she said, and before she could register what was happening, she had an armful of teenager. Peter clung to her, sobbing. She could feel the tears through her shirt, and she quietly sniffled back some of her own. The pure kid in her arms deserved so much more than the nightmares and heartache he’d been given.
“S-sorry,” he hiccuped, pulling back once his sobs slowed into sniffles.
Pepper took his warm, tear-stained face in her hands, gently wiping the wetness from his eyes. “Peter, don’t you dare apologize. It’s not your fault, honey. Tony always said that you are the best of us, and he’s right. You are so so good, so brave, and you are not weak.”
Peter sniffled and nodded hesitantly, but the lies he believed were still clearly written in his eyes.
Peter’s emotions, heightened from months of nightmares, brought earlier doubts about his place with Pepper to the surface and he couldn’t keep the doubt out of his words.
“But I’m not a little kid, ya know. I’m not even your kid, and, and I hate that you have to take care of me, that I’m so weak, that I-”
“Peter,” Pepper said firmly. She hadn’t realized he didn’t know, but then, she’d never told him. She paused to make sure he was really listening, holding eye contact. “You’re like a son to me, too. I love you so much, sweetheart.” Peter startled a little, taking in a shaking breath. She could see was still holding onto some doubt, so she whispered it again, pressing the words to his curls with a kiss. “I love you, okay?”
He nodded once before falling back into her arms. “I love you too,” he whispered against her shoulder.
When Tony came back from the store a little while later, Peter was sleeping peacefully, curled up against Pepper’s side. He knew immediately what happened, and his heart ached that he hadn’t been there, but that was overshadowed by the gratitude he felt for his incredible wife and the knowledge that Peter would always have a Stark to help him.