Chapter Text
“Who... are you?”
“I am Todoroki Touya.”
…
Hawks woke up in the hospital, his torso wrapped in bandages, Tokoyami at his bedside.
“H-Hawks?” The kid asked, clearly worried. “Are you awake?”
Hawk's voice sounded raspy and felt so dry. “...How long have I been out?”
“A couple of days. W-we weren’t sure if you were going to wake up.” He’s close to tears.
That’s not good. Shit, did they even win? And Touya... He-..No, that's not important right now.
Wait.
A thought crossed his mind as Hawks suddenly remembered all that had happened.
“My wings.. Tokoyami, my wings a-are they-- will they be able to-”
“No, we don’t think they’ll be able to regenerate.” The doctor said as he walked in, his voice solemn. “Tokoyami, I’m going to have to ask you to leave the room so I can speak with Hawks.”
“Okay.. I’ll be back later, Hawks Sensei.” Tokoyami says as he leaves the room. The air tense with the implications of what was previously mentioned.
“That’s some kid you got there. You know, if it wasn’t for him, I don’t think you would’ve made it out of there alive.” The doctor says as he walks towards Hawks.
“Yeah, he’s a good kid. He’ll make a great hero some day, I’d hope to take him on as a sidekick...” The doctor looks at Hawks for a moment with a sympathetic look. “I guess that’s not gonna happen now.. So, Doc, what’s the status of my health?”
“Well, your wings were badly burned during the fight and.. We don’t think you're going to be able to regenerate them, even if we had someone with a quirk that could help..The damage is pretty bad”
“...”
For a second, Hawks can’t breathe. Everything stops. This it, the end of his career as a hero. He knew this was going to happen, but despite that, a lump forms in his throat. Hawks doesn’t want to cry, he won’t cry, he can’t.. Not now. He refuses to not in front of anyone.
He swallows the lump in his throat before finally speaking up
“I s-suppose this means I can’t work as a hero anymore, can I?” his voice is shaky despite how hard he’s trying to mask the pain he's feeling.
The doctor sighs. “Sadly, yes..”
Deep down, Hawks had slightly hoped there would still be a way to save his career. But, the truth of the matter is it’s over.
He failed.
“Now, that’s not the only thing that I have to discuss with you.”
Hawks stopped listening after that. He knew he should be listening, but his mind is elsewhere. He thinks of the brutal training that was his childhood. The people at The Commission who basically raised him. The town where he was born, his low life parents... He was the one that had made it out of there. The one who had a future going for him, had been chosen for something, to do something important. To be part of something that could make a difference.
But that was all gone now. Burnt to ash along with his wings. He had essentially sold his soul to the Commission, even stooped as low as to associate with villains for the Commission, and for what? Nothing.
Eventually, the doctor left. The burn on the left side of his face will probably become a permanent scar. Wow, so much for his good looks.. Most of his injuries are burns, with the exception of a sprained ankle and some broken bones.
But, it should all heal rather quickly.
Weeks have passed. It’s almost been a month. Hawks hardly noticed, too entrapped in the aftermath of what he did. What Dabi told him, what Touya told him.. Though, his mind was mostly stuck in the guilt he felt. He hopes that Twice survived for the league's sake. For his sake. But deep down, he knows that just like his wings, Twice is gone for good. He knows he can’t be a hero now. Maybe that's good, now he can’t hurt anyone else, even in the name of greater good-- No, he can’t think like that. Killing Twice was the right thing to do, it’s what the Commission wanted him to do. So why doesn’t it feel right? It’s not the first time Hawks had questioned the Commission, but ever since they sent him to infiltrate The League he’s been questioning them more and more. He knows he shouldn’t, despite how questionable a lot of their actions have been. They’ve always been there for him, even if most of their advice only hurt him more, they were still there. Hawks didn’t know anything different. Even so...
“Hawks?” The nurse peeks her head into the room ripping Hawks from his thoughts.
“Yes?”
“It’s time for you to leave. The Commission said they're sending someone over to pick you up.” She says, a bit hesitantly.
“Thank you, I’ll be down in a moment to check myself out.”
She nods and leaves the room. Hawks stands up and grabs the set of clothes Rumi had dropped off for him weeks ago. He goes to the bathroom to change. Putting on his shirt without hassle, it felt so odd to not have to worry about his wings getting caught on his clothes for once in his life. It left him feeling a bit empty inside.. Hawks plasters on one of his fake TV smiles and heads down to the lobby, where he finds Tokoyami waiting for him.
“Hawks Sensei, it’s good to see you doing well!”
“Tokoyami, what are you doing here? I thought they were sending someone from The Commission over..” Hawks said, trying to hide the hint of confusion in his voice.
“Surprise! Mirko contacted me a week ago to ask me if I would accompany her to pick you up from the hospital, but she got caught up in a robbery this morning and wasn’t able to come.”
“Oh, I see. And The Commission?” Hawks asks jokingly, knowing he still has to meet with them today.
“You don’t have to see them today. Mirko-san practically begged them to let you have the week off to recover.” Tokoyami says, not a hint of sarcasm or humor in his voice.
“For real? Why wasn’t I informed of this?”
Tokoyami shrugs. “Guess she really wanted to surprise you” Hawks just stares at him in disbelief, not sure what to say next.
“..So, should we go get some lunch? On me.” He says, finally breaking the silence. “If Mirko finishes up with that robbery, maybe she can join us.”
Tokoyami simply nods and they walk out of the hospital, beginning their long walk to Hawks’ favorite Yakitori place.
After a couple of blocks, Hawks pulls out his phone to text Rumi and if she wants to meet up for lunch if she’s done with hero work.
Hawks: So, you got me out of hero work for a week? Or is Tokoyami just making things up so he can hang out with me more?
Rumi: Oh sweet, he didn’t chicken out. He was so nervous on the phone, I half thought he would. LOL
Hawks: So it's true?
Rumi: You birdbrain, of course it’s true! Took a lot of begging and bargaining though.
Rumi: So, what does the big number 2 plan on doing his week off?
Hawks: Rumi, you know as well as anyone I can’t be number 2 anymore.
Hawks: Buuuuut I was thinking about hitting up my favorite yakitori place for lunch if you want to join us. ;)))
Rumi: Of course I will. I just finished up with the paperwork for this water villain that was robbing a bank this morning. Also, sorry for bringing up the number 2 thing, I just.. haven’t gotten used to it yet.
Hawks: It’s okay, I hav-
A sudden gust of wind causes Hawks to look up from his phone mid text. It’s so cold.. He really misses his wings. If he had them right now, he could use them to block the wind or he could fly Tokoyami and himself there instead of walking. The holes in the back of his shirt aren’t helping much either
“Hawks Sensei? Are you alright?” Tokoyami asks, standing a little way up ahead of him, Hawks only now realising he had stopped walking. “Yeah, I’m fine. Just never realized how cold it was..”
They eventually arrived only to find Mirko standing there waiting for them. “What took you all so long? I’m starving!”
“Well some of us had to walk all the way from the hospital” Hawks said jokingly trying to mask the unease rising in his stomach at the thought of walking instead of flying. “Why don’t we go inside? I'm hungry too, Mirko-san” Tokoyami cut in before Hawks could say something he regrets.
That finally gets them all to go in and they are then seated in Hawks and Mirko's usual spot next to the window looking out over the city. “So Hawks what do you plan on doing now that you finally have some time off?” Rumi asks one of her ears flopping down inquisitively as she leans over the table. “I-I’m not really sure I can’t remember the last time I took a break” he says trying to avoid the elephant in the room “Maybe you could come to U.A. Hawks-sensei I’m sure the teachers would love to have you there plus it would give you something to do.” Tokoyami chimes in while dark shadow nods enthusiastically, clearly liking the idea. “That’s an awfully sweet suggestion kid, but I think U.A. has enough stuff to deal with. I don’t think they need some wingless bird running around” Hawks says “I’m sure I’ll find something to do while I’m off” he says quickly hoping to ease the sad looks on Tokoyami and Rumi’s faces at the mention of his wings.
“Are you guys ready to order?” The waitress suddenly says distracting from the previous conversation.
“Yeah I think we are.”
Hawks orders his usual, Mirko and Tokoyami order the same, suddenly not being as hungry as before. They chat a bit more about lighter things trying to stray as far away from anything pertaining to heroes or hero work. Which is hard but they make it work. Their food eventually comes.
Tokoyami suddenly stands up halfway through their meal “I’m so sorry Hawks-sensei but I have to get back to U.A. Todoroki-kun, and I have a study session that I completely forgot about”
“It’s alright Tokoyami go ahead, I don’t want you to miss out on any school work because of me”
“Thank you Hawks-sensei” and with that tokoyami left the room. Hawks and Mirko finished up shortly after.
“Shit, Hawks I gotta go. Are you… gonna be able to get home by yourself.” Mirko asked not bothering to hide the concern in her voice. “Yeah of course I can”
“Thank you, Hawks-sensei” and with that Tokoyami left the restaurant to go meet up with Todoroki. Mirko and Hawks finished their meal shortly after.
“Shit, Hawks I gotta go, I just got an alert. Are you...gonna be able to get home by yourself?” Mirko says not bothering to hide the concern in her voice. “Of course I can, Rumi. I’m not defenseless, or did you forget that I’ve had more training than you?” Mirko just looks at him like he’s crazy “But Hawks- alright just be careful, ok?” She says this as if he’s an active trouble maker or a small child going into the city for the first time. “Rumi I’ll be fine, I promise nothing bad's gonna happen.”
“Alright” and with that she hops aways.
As Hawks turned a corner he suddenly pulled inside a building and shoved up against a wall.
“I- What the hell?!”
Looking up to see the face of his attacker Hawks is greeted with familiar ice cold eyes.
“Hey hero” Dabi stood there. Standing over Hawks, he looked bored but Hawks knew he wasn’t. He could see it in his eyes just as he could when they were kids. Jesus, how did he not realise that he was Touya before.
“To-Dabi what the hell do you want.”
“Aw, what's wrong Keigo not happy to see me?” Dabi said clearly amused. Hawks just glared up at him. “Alright, fine I’m here cause I want to help you” Hawks just stares at him in disbelief. It’s clearly bullshit, the last time he saw Dabi, he...burned his wings off as revenge for twices murder. There's no way in hell he wants to help him now.
“...What”
“Are you deaf, birdbrain? I said I want to help you” Dabi says again, he can’t be serious. “I find that hard to believe. But I’ll humor you ‘Dabi’. What in the hell would you of all people want to ‘help’ me with?” Dabi backs up a bit to give Hawks some room to breathe.
“Well, it may have something to do with getting your quirk back.” He says a smirk forming on his face. “I mean I assume you want it back don’t you?”
“Wow, that’s real funny ‘Dabi’. It truly is but if you just came here to spout lies and antagonise me, I think I’ll be on my-” Dabi throws a small black bag at Hawks and hits him right in the face. “I-”
“It’s a quirk enhancing drug. It’s not strong enough to bring your wings back entirely but it should give you some part of your quirk back.”
“w-why?” Hawks says turning the drug over in his hands. This wasn’t what the Hawks had expected at all. He can’t be serious-no this could probably kill him. He has no way of knowing if this is what Dabi says it is.
“I felt bad about your wings” That’s it? That's the only explanation he gets?
“Why should I believe that for all I know this is poison and you're asking me to inject it into my body willingly?”
“What? don’t you trust me Kei?”
“Of course I don’t trust you Touya!” Dabi stood there staring at Hawks a flash of guilt crossed his face before settling back on his usual bored expression. “Keigo- I’m sorry about your wings I really am and I get that you don’t want to trust me but can you please just try. You don’t have to use it, just think about it ok?”
“Why would you even do that though I’m not going to join the league, if that’s what you're getting at” He’s just staring at Hawks now in disbelief, like he just said something absolutely ridiculous.
“Even after the commission threw you away, you're still loyal to them? Did they not tell you what happened to me or do I have to do it myself? What he did to me?!” Dabi was clearly getting angry now. But Hawks had no clue as to what he was talking about. Sure he knew that the commission has done some shady things. Still...
“I- What are you talking about I haven’t spoken with the commission sense I got out of the hospital”
“ You haven’t… Of course not why would you be out walking around if you’d talked to them.” Now that really didn’t make sense, what does Dabi know about the commission that he doesn’t?
“What is this really about, Touya?”
“Just tell them my name and you’ll understand” Dabi began to walk towards an exit near the back of the building “and stop calling me that”
Hawks just stared at him dumbfounded, he wasn’t sure what to do. He still had the quirk enhancing drug Dabi had given him. What was he supposed to do if you used it? Would Dabi come find him? “Wait, To-Dabi, what am I supposed to do if I do use the drug?”
“I’ll find you birdbrain, don’t worry.” and with that he left. Hawks eventually left too and headed back to his apartment which was a longer walk than he had expected.