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“You in need of some company?”
Julian lifted his head from where he was staring at the floor, finding Asteria leaning back against the wall. He hadn’t heard him come in, or Mazelinka call out to him.
“So long as it is yours.”
“Shut up.”
Though there was a hint of a smile behind the plague doctor mask, in the way his voice covered up a quiet laugh. Asteria moved to sit on the edge of the bed, bumping shoulders with Julian who took a chance to look at him. His shoulders were tense, tight like coiled springs despite his slouched posture. He was tired, and Julian couldn’t blame him. He was tired as well.
“How are you holding up?” Asteria finally spoke.
“Could be better. Could be worse.”
Asteria nodded at that, his thumb pressing into his own palm and kneading small circles into it. Julian swallowed, gloved hands lacing fingers with the other who squeezed back. He wasn’t too sure what to expect. Asteria wasn’t as touchy as most would pin him to be, but he and Ilya melded together with ease.
“You look like you’ve been awake for three days too long without any sleep.” Asteria tilted his head a little to indicate he was looking at Ilya. “Still having nightmares?”
“Now you know I have better things to dream about than nightmares.” Julian grinned, but Asteria squeezed his hand a little tighter. “But I... yes. The usual ones, on that note.”
A low hum in response and he let his head fall onto Asterias shoulder, hands separating as the others hand looped over his shoulders. Asteria had the comfort of knowing what had really happened the night of the ‘murder’, which had made Julian more frustrated with himself. But he also had the comfort of Asteria himself. He always was a stubborn one, which seemed to do wonders for Julian’s hard-headedness.
“They’re just dreams, Julian. They won’t cause you any harm.” Asteria spoke.
“I know that. It doesn’t change the feeling of how real it is.” Julian mumbled, eye fluttering shut as Asteria rested his chin on top of his head.
“I get it. But avoiding the nightmares by staying awake isn’t good for anyone, especially you.” His voice rumbled, low and quiet. “If you need me to stay I can.”
“Please.”
Neither one of them moved, Asteria hearing the trap door to the downstairs room close. Julian opened an eye as Asteria moved, black gloves being peeled off and discarded to the empty chair across the room. Giving him more room, Julian lifted his head from his shoulder as the other stood, kicking off his boots and folding his cape up. Julian laid back in the twin bed with a sigh, idly watching him dress down. His belt that held a dagger, a bag filled with who knows what, and his hat. At that moment, Ilya felt his chest squeeze. He’d never seen Asteria without his mask - not in the many years they had run into each other, and not during the years they’d worked in close quarters. Not fully anyway. He was lenient in having the lower half of his face visible at times.
“Ilya, your thoughts are very loud.”
Asterias' voice was loud in the silence and it made him jump. The beaked mask turned to face him full force, and Julian swallowed.
“Sorry. I’m just thinking that I’ve never fully seen your face. We’ve known each other for more than a decade and-“
“I know.”
Asteria cut him off, turning back to face the wall as he reached for the clasps of his mask. Julian bolted upright, head swimming before he regained his senses.
“You don’t have to on my account, you can keep it on.”
He blinked as Asteria laughed, the sound becoming clearer as the clasps were unbuckled and it was set down on the chair amongst his other things.
“That’s very nice of you, but I find it funny you think I sleep with that thing on.”
The scarf was unravelled, and Julian watched as Asterias head came into view. A strip of yellow hair was ruffled to stand up where it was, flattened by the scarf and mask before he turned. Julian felt his words catch in his throat. Eyes shining like the coins he had in his bag, a face so soft for such a tough individual; he wasn’t at all like Julian thought he’d be. If anything, he couldn’t help but feel like he’d seen this exact person somewhere in his life but he could quite reach the name.
“Don’t be so disappointed. There’s only room in this city for one mysterious individual who can also be attractive.”
Julian laughed as Asteria took up his own half of the bed, lying back down as his eye studied the other. He had a nose that wasn’t pointed but wasn’t flat either, cheeks rounded but not enough to hide the way his cheekbones sat. He looked like he was very much from the South, swaddled away in thick furs and shielded from the brisk snow that would come down like a heavy blanket.
“You’re a lot better than my imagination could have come up with,” Julian remarked, and he watched his nose scrunch and cheeks turn pink. “And now I can see your reactions to what I have to say.”
Asteria looked to him with an unimpressed look, and Julian merely laughed as he scooted closer. It wasn’t long before their limbs became entangled, Julian’s face buried in the crook of his neck. He smelt of honey and the smoke from a campfire, indicating he had left his shop before coming here. It had always been a comforting smell - different from the stench of alcohol and old fish Julian often smelt in the South End. Even back when they were looking for a cure, honey was a prominent smell wherever he went. A bittersweet sentiment to the world around them crumbling. Though his eye fluttered closed as fingers ran up to cradle the back of his skull, absentmindedly untangling the hair. It was a miracle Asteria hadn’t turned tail and run yet, though he was as stubborn as Julian was reckless.
“At the rate you’re going, you’re going to run yourself into the ground.” Asteria mumbled, fingers moving further up as Julian deflated. “You have to take better care of yourself.”
“I know.” He breathed, and for a moment he thought Asteria would ask him to expand on that. But he was squeezed a little tighter as if he would slip out of the embrace and disappear.
“There’s a difference between knowing something and doing something about that thing. But you’ll get there someday.”
“What if I don’t?”
“You will.”
Then silence, Asteria’s breathing a little slower and gentle as Julian slipped into the embrace of sleep.