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Chapter Text

Qinghe was most beautiful in early autumn. It was barely a season's worth of time of his stay at the Unclean Realm yet Wei Wuxian already knew that no other time of the year would ever come close to the sight of leaves spilling gold and vermilion over the ash gray mountain sides at the heart of Qinghe. Transcendence through decay, the grace of a waning life as it slowly turned to dust. There was a certain strength in it, Wei Wuxian mused, when something as close to death managed to retain as much radiance. Missing it felt like a waste.

"Are you sure you don't want an escort?" The question distracted Wei Wuxian from the bundle of clothes in his hands. It was very unusual of him to assemble everything he needed for an upcoming journey ahead of time, but overall stranger things have happened. Although the reason for his preparations was less foresight and more lack of anything else to do.

Nie Huaisang, seated across the room hid the lower half of his face with the ever present fan in his hand, but could not disguise the faint worry in his voice. Maybe someone less acquainted with Nie quirks and deflections wouldn't have picked up on it, but Wei Wuxian hadn’t been living in Qinghe for the past weeks for nothing. Not that getting acquainted with said quirks had been the primary reason for his stay in the Unclean Realm. It proved, however, to be a practical side effect. Several things suddenly made a lot more sense. Without any intent of his own, his hand went to scratch at the base of the top knot – a shape that he wasn't quite used to yet – the twin braids on the side of his head pulling at his skin in a similarly foreign fashion. The unfamiliar weight of the bronze pin still caught him by surprise sometimes, but not as much as his reflection in the mirror did. 'Of age' was a nice name for it.

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"It's a betrothal gift. The motif is what other sects refer to as the Flower of Qinghe, but here it is known as Resent."

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'Marriage' was another. When he had turned his hopes to Qinghe he had not known what exactly to expect but what he had gotten… Was not what he had expected. It had surprised him when Nie Huaisang asked him for help, it had been harder still to imagine what lay ahead on that rickety road behind the one-planked bridge. Even after all this time he still didn't know how he was supposed to describe his life now, what words to use to express the circadian rhythm of his current self?

"Nie-xiong," Wei Wuxian drawled, wearing his usual smirk, as he moved on to assemble his other necessities. "Who are you talking to?"

"But Wei-xiong, that's exactly my point," Nie Huaisang answered with his typical whine that no longer fooled Wei Wuxian. It had stopped fooling him around the time that Nie Huaisang, at no other volition than his own, stood at the base of a hill made of corpses, and all but threw himself at his feet.

"Nie-xiong, have you ever known me to be helpless?" Then again, he was pretty sure his own arrogant demeanor wasn't fooling Nie Huaisang either.

"I really don't know, Wei-xiong," Nie Huaisang answered in a tone that suggested he knew exactly. He didn't even bother masking it.

Wei Wuxian couldn't say that wasn't fair. After all, what other reason had landed him at the doors of the Unclean Realm other than his utter inaptitude? Nie Huaisang would not have come to him, had he not had something precious to offer him in return.

At least the Wens were safe. Safe and sound, along with his brother, behind the walls of Lotus Pier, the Jiang Sect growing stronger with each passing day, no small thanks to the continued support of the Nie Sect and Jiang Cheng's powerful cultivation. The two most important of his very few true accomplishments. His only endeavours that didn't end up in failures. The two promises he had managed to keep. This, at the very least he'd been allowed. Now he only had to make sure it wasn't at the cost of another's ruin.

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"I need your help, Wei-xiong. You're the only one who can do it. Help me save my brother and I’ll swear my fealty to you and your family forever."

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Inadvertently his eyes slid over to his desk, where the two letters he had received this morning lay, still open and perturbing. The first one written in the sharp angles of his brother’s hand, soothing perhaps in it's essence, with the words 'Jin Ling and Wei Yuan have both arrived safely' burgeoning that sentiment, only betrayed by the following 'no news yet, continuing the search' shining at him mockingly further on the page. The second letter from none other than Zewu-jun, all slanted elegance and polite grace, a response to his own inquiry from a few days ago, largely more foreboding for more than one reason.

A smile stole itself across Wei Wuxian's face, it was not a happy one.

"I'm only going to Cloud Recesses, Nie-xiong," he finally said. "Two days downstream. It's best to travel light. We can't risk arousing any unnecessary attention." Especially not from Lanling, just slightly off route.

"Ah, but Wei-xiong," Nie Huaisang wailed. "I really don't know if it's safe at all…"

"Nie-xiong." Wei Wuxian let a little sharpness seep into his voice that he now knew to work wonders on members of the Nie clan. "I won't drown. Besides, I won't be alone. I'm stopping by Lotus Pier to pick up Wen Ning. And to see my son."

"And check on Jiang-xiong," Nie Huaisang quiped.

That too, Wei Wuxian thinks, but doesn't voice it. "In any case, this entire thing was your idea, I seem to recall."

"I really don't know what you're talking about, Wei-xiong." Nie Huaisang fanned himself with a few quick flicks of his wrist, and just like that the particular discussion was over. Wei Wuxian knew that Nie Huaisang didn't want to involve anyone else in all of this in the first place (especially no one from Gusu) and had only agreed at his insistence, but there was no way that they could get the proof they needed without help. Nevertheless, at the current state of things they couldn't dawdle any longer and they both knew it.

As if it was a summoning ritual they have been conducting, a booming voice hollered from just down the hall, "Wei Wuxian!"

Not two heartbeats later the fearsome leader of Qinghe Nie, infamous Chifeng-zun, da-ge to the entire cultivation world, recently crowned as a personified bloodbath and, oh, his husband stormed through the door. Wei Wuxian didn't flinch, not exactly, but the feeling of disquietude that had been nesting in his stomach for weeks now made itself more at home.

"Nie Mingjue," Wei Wuxian greeted him, as he'd been addressing him lately, the name still not quite sitting right on his tongue, but still remaining the most adequate one in their current predicament.

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"It only grows on shadowed cliff-sides, thus being hard to find and even harder to pick. Although up close it is said to be of striking beauty."

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Nie Mingjue took a short look around his room and scoffed. "I see you haven't changed your plans."

"I haven't," Wei Wuxian answered although no question has been posed, an easy, trained smile on his face. "Gusu does have the best library after all, even regarding unorthodox topics. I have written to Lan Zhan, he might be amenable in helping me compile a comprehensive research."

He only realized his slip up when Nie Mingjue's expression darkened.

"Yes, I'm sure Lan Wangji will be most pleased to see you." It wasn't venom that was permeating his voice, but it was getting closer to it each time he all but spat out the name he once used to say with nothing but brotherly affection.

"I will also be stopping by Lotus Pier." Wei Wuxian chose not to react to the spite, as he always did nowadays. He knew better than to take offense for something Nie Mingjue could not control. "If you need anything…"

"Nothing." he was cut short as his husband's attention turned to Nie Huaisang, tone just as sharp as before. "And what are you doing here?! Do you have no other work to do than hang around my husband's room?!"

He used a sweeping gesture to emphasize his words, but Nie Huaisang didn't seem the least phased, fanning himself slowly, almost lazily. However Wei Wuxian knew all his movements were deliberate and carefully measured, even if Nie-xiong denied it with every breath.

"But da-ge, I'm helping him prepare, of course!"

"He's keeping me company." Wei Wuxian drew the attention back to himself. "Was there something you needed?"

"I need the work that running this place requires to be done, preferably in a timely fashion!" With this he turned to Nie Huaisang, progressively redder in the face.

Nie Huaisang stood up, without any of his usual protest. He too knew better. "I will get right to it, da-ge."

"As for you…" Nie Mingjue turned back to Wei Wuxian, not yet hollering but not too far from it either. Wei Wuxian held his gaze squarely, conscious to keep the light tilt of his smile up. "Send my regards to Lan Wangji." His tone wasn't anywhere near deferential but Wei Wuxian, to his credit, didn't bat a single eyelash. He didn't know what he was expecting next, but it wasn't the suddenly more subdued voice as Nie Migjue spoke again, "And greetings to your brother. And to Wei Yuan."

The words warm in nature were an ice cold fist through the diamond center of his chest, squeezing painfully at a depth that burned not unlike the smoke over Lotus Pier. "I will make sure to pass your greetings."

He didn't get to finish his sentence, as Nie Mingjue turned on his heel and stormed out of his pavilion.

For several drawn out moments heavy silence fell.

"It's getting worse, isn't it?" Nie Huaisang asked, somewhat unnecessarily.

Wei Wuxian still replied, "Yes."

They shared a look. "I'll set off at daybreak."

Nie Huaisang didn't even tease him about getting up early.

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There are books. In Gusu. On cultivating Yin."
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Gusu in autumn was just as beautiful as Gusu in spring, but it did not rival the crystalline purity of winter, frozen innocence preserved in the moment for the coming of the new year. Having grown up in Yunmeng, and having endured the deadly iciness of the Burial Mounds, Wei Wuxian had never favored winter for it's stark coldness. However, he had caught himself wondering from time to time whether he would have enjoyed it, had he ended up in Gusu, instead of Qinghe. Not that he'd ever find out now. Perhaps in another life.

"Nie-fujun!" The guards greeted him upon sight, a greeting still alien in his ears. Another on the seemingly endless list of things he couldn't get used to. They catered and bowed to him, as if but a few months ago they hadn't been cursing his name. "Welcome to Cloud Recesses, Nie-fujun! To what do we owe this visit?"

The status of a married man was a curious one, especially if it was to the sworn brother of your sect leader. He still wasn't sure whether to be amused, pleased or offended by it, so he chose to be neither, accepting the strange twists fate seemed to save for him with as much grace and as little complaint as he could. It could have been much, much worse. He still had to leave Wen Ning waiting in Caiyi, but that was neither here nor there.

They ushered him to a sitting room and politely asked him to wait, as they scurried off – as much as Lans were capable of scurrying – and he was left alone to his thoughts in the room of dark wood and pale screens with nothing to focus his mind on but his worries and the ghosts of may have beens. Then the door slid open and a familiar figure in pale azure and white stepped in, steady and reassuring like dry wood in a blizzard.

"Hanguang-jun," he stood up, the greeting twisting his tongue in unfamiliar ways.

Lan Zhan didn't quite look at him, as much as he looked at a point somewhere on him, well-nigh to the side of his face, where his twin braids twisted their way up, to the leather band holding his bun, embossed with a beast instead of a nine petaled lotus, before settling briefly on the bronze hair pin cast in the form of the Qinghe flower. It didn't linger long, sinking along the line of his gray, embroidered robes, all hallmarks of matrimony laid bare in front of him. The red ribbon hidden behind the leather band, a fitful glimpse of vermilion in his dark hair, the only remaining trace of his past self. Finally Lan Zhan's eyes seemed to settle on a non-descript point just shy off his cheek.

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"Me too, Wei Ying."

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"Nie-fujun," the familiar voice spoke quietly, drifting over the room in a familiar ebb.

If he thought the title sounded alien on the guard's lips, it was on Lan Zhan's that it sounded unacceptable.

"Lan Zhan," he moaned. "Heavens, Lan Zhan, please don't call me that, it sounds horrible when you say it."

"Wei Ying," Lan Zhan amended after a brief hesitation, the tiniest, faintest quirk to his lips.

And just like that it was back, that easy, warm companionship that had defined a significant period of his formative years. Lan Zhan's steady friendship had always been a comfort, a solace, a harbor to return to in case the river got too stormy.

"Oh, Lan Zhan, I missed you," he half-chuckled and half-sighed the same moment as Lan Zhan glided across the floor towards him.

"I also missed Wei Ying." He nodded, now within arm's reach. And, reaching out Wei Wuxian did, a tentative hand to his elbow. Lan Zhan didn't pull away. Barring those dark, cold days in that forsaken cave and the sunlit days of their youth when Wei Wuxian could afford the luxury of not caring about silly things like propriety, it was as close to a hug as they ever got. Wei Wuxian basked in it's comfort.

Lan Zhan asked for tea, which he poured once it arrived and they sat back down, Lan Zhan at the head of the table and Wei Wuxian at the side, next to each other. For some time they sat in silence, neither of them really knowing where to start.

"Lan Zhan, have you gotten my letter?" Wei Wuxian finally asked, deciding that the purpose of his visit was the safest topic, all things considered. He had sent the letter before his departure from Qinghe to make sure Lan Zhan knew he was coming. He hoped it did not read as desperate as he had felt at that time.

"I have," Lan Zhan said. More silence followed, but it was a pleasant, unhurried one.

"And?" Wei Wuxian inquired after a gratuitous sip of his tea, which he was sure was a mixture supposed to calm his spirit. "What do you think, Lan Zhan? Tell me, am I going crazy? Or is there a blade hidden in that sleeve?"

"I think." Lan Zhan didn't meet his eye, an expression of thoughtfulness etched into his jade-like features. "Wei Ying has raised some serious concerns, that at the present time cannot be confirmed." Finally meeting his eye, he added, like an afterthought. "Yet I do not believe them to be entirely unfounded."

"So it's not just me?" Wei Wuxian wasn't sure whether to feel happy about that confirmation. "It's not just a fever dream? You believe me, Lan Zhan?"

"I believe that Wei Ying believes." was his simple answer.

"But you do not believe it." Wei Wuxian followed.

"Inconclusive," Lan Zhan said after another moment of thought. "Not impossible."

Wei Wuxian looked at him.

"Wei Ying," Lan Zhan said. "Tell me."

So Wei Wuxian told him.

Told Lan Zhan the same way Nie Huaisang had explained it to him back then, a different kind of powerless yet the same kind of desperate as Wei Wuxian. That night he had been but another lost soul on a mountain built of corpses. Wei Wuxian recalled how Nie Huaisang had begged him to believe his da-ge to be maybe brash or impulsive, but never cruel or unkind. How gentle and caring a brother he used to be before… before. Wei Wuxian hadn't been sure at the start how much of it was the love of a younger brother speaking, but soon enough he'd learnt. He saw.

"He snaps at Nie-xiong now too," Wei Wuxian concluded with a sigh. " But I know that's not him, I know, Lan Zhan. In spite of everything I may not be the closest to him, but I…"

The words caught in his throat as it constricted painfully, in a sudden struggle for breath.

The warm touch of Lan Zhan's hand against his own anchored him and he was able to finish. The thought twisting his stomach into complicated knots. "I've already learned of his kindness, Lan Zhan. And I know it's still there. He's struggling, fighting against it… And he's losing."

Lan Zhan nodded, once. "Cleansing is not helping?"

Wei Wuxian barked a laugh. "Helping! It worsens after every session!"

At this Lan Zhan gave him a look of what might have been disbelief, but Wei Wuxian didn't have the feeling that he was being dismissed, even as his friend said, "that is not possible."

"But it's the truth!" Wei Wuxian threw his hands in the air. "It is, Lan Zhan, I swear it. Nie-xiong noticed it too! He was the one who alerted me to it. I am not making it up and there is nothing else that I can think of that could cause such a rapid decline."

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"He killed them all. It was like he wasn’t there at all, just his body filled with bloodlust, like a puppet on a string. I should have realized it sooner."

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Lan Zhan was still frowning. "It is not possible for Cleansing to cause harm, if played correctly and with intent. It is a complex score especially designed for thorough healing of body, mind and spirit, through careful direction of spiritual energy. Even if played with mistakes, without intent there would be no harm, merely a dulled or misplaced effect."

"Meaning that for the effect to be ill, the score would have to be altered to fit ill intent." Voicing it felt heavier and scarier than Wei Wuxian had thought it would, even if the suspicion had existed from the moment Nie Huaisang had first approached him. "It would have to be purposeful."

"Correct." Lan Zhan nodded.

"This is why you have to help me Lan Zhan!" Wei Wuxian swallowed against his outburst and counted to five. Yelling at Lan Zhan wouldn't get him his help. "I have not studied ways to alter scores, my knowledge of musical cultivation is limited, and I have no proof beyond what my own two eyes are witnessing. Lan Zhan… I know I have no right to ask this of you, but you're the only one I can trust. I owe him so much, Lan Zhan. It's thanks to him that my sect is thriving and that the Wens are alive. He even let me keep a-Yuan, and I… I…"

Wei Wuxian took a deep breath, before his own words could choke him. "Lan Zhan, I don't want to be a widower before the honeymoon period is even over."

Before I even get to be a husband, he thought wryly, but kept it to himself. It was enough that he was begging Lan Zhan for help, it wouldn't be fair to unload all of his matrimonial struggles onto him as well. He wasn't that cruel, and Lan Zhan could do nothing about it anyway.

Lan Zhan eyed him with what Wei Wuxian thought to be pity for a sad moment before offering, "what did xiongzhang say? You have written to him."

Wei Wuxian snorted. "In essence, he very politely asked me why I don't pack up and go visit hell for a while." Lan Zhan's horrified expression was almost too much and Wei Wuxian felt genuine amusement tilt the corners of his lips up for the first time in weeks. Not that it lasted long. "Not in so many words! Don't worry, your brother would never be that crass. He wrote the same things you just said, however, stated in no uncertain terms that he did not believe the music itself being the problem. Then he went to firmly conclude that if 'Cleansing' is not helping then Nie Mingjue's condition simply is that bad, and that we must 'prepare ourselves.' Well, I don't want to! If there is a chance I can prevent this, it is my duty to try. I owe him that much, Lan Zhan."

Lan Zhan nodded again. He seemed to hesitate for one more moment, before he went on saying, "there is indeed a way to alter 'Cleansing' to be harmful." Wei Wuxian's eyes widened. "However, it can't be said for certain without the exact score."

Wei Wuxian almost got dizzy with relief. If that was the only hurdle to Lan Zhan believing him, there was nothing easier to overcome. "I could play it for you."

Lan Zhan looked at him.

"He taught it to us," Wei Wuxian elaborated. "Me and Nie-xiong. So we could play it for Nie Mingjue whenever his qi was unbalanced. It's how Nie-xiong noticed in the first place. Playing the song that was supposed to calm him, it drove him to kill his shidi instead. He barely stopped himself from killing Nie-xiong. I haven't played it to Nie Mingjue for this reason, but I asked Lianfang-zun to teach it to me in that guise, so I could see for myself."

"Alright," Lan Zhan said at last. "Play it then."

Chapter Text

Late autumn did not flatter Lanling the same way it flattered Gusu or Qinghe. The opulence was starkly mismatched with the austerity of the desolate wasteland the country was turning into, harvest season brought to a fruitful end. No, Lanling was a place of late spring, shiny new beginnings, and riches just within the grasp of anyone daring to reach for them. Or that was what the Jins would have liked to make believe, bounty in exchange for what was nothing but a bloated golden cage.

Oh, how Wei Wuxian hated himself for ever allowing his shijie to set foot inside shiny Jinlintai.

He should have stopped her while he had the chance.

And now?

"From Qinghe, arrives the Nie Sect!"

Now no one was surprised about the delay of the conference by almost a full season, as Lanling recovered from the political chaos of the newest succession dilemma. Now all he could do was ascend the endless steps of shiny Jinlintai, led by his own husband's hand searching without avail for the familiar face he wouldn't find. Now pig-faced Jin Guangshan was what he would get instead of that warm, welcoming smile.

"Yeah, me too." The face he has made must have looked especially tortured to earn himself his husband's agreeing huff. He turned his curious gaze to the side to regard the scoff on Nie Mingjue's chiseled face.

At least there was this.
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"You were right, Nie-xiong. By altering these few notes, he was able to play a section of 'Turmoil' – not all of it, but enough to cause a qi deviation in the long term. There is no mistake. Lan Zhan confirmed it himself."
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Nie Mingjue looked as excited as Wei Wuxian felt to be at Carp Tower, but there was an almost...amused line around his eyes as he gazed at him with a look as close to softness as Wei Wuxian had ever seen him bear. He was doing great. Even Wen Qing said so, when Wei Wuxian finally managed to convince Nie Mingjue to let her treat him. At the present?

"Let's get through this without a diplomatic incident, shall we?" At the present he seemed as wary as ever, but the shadows beneath his eyes weren't haunted, no deeper than the shallow wrinkle of his skin. He no longer snapped at Huaisang – at least not more than Jiang Cheng would snap at him – exasperation rather than rancor the impulse behind it. It lifted some of the weight off of Wei Wuxian's heart. It also made him just a little bolder.

"You know, Nie Mingjue, technically I am no longer a member of the Jiang sect," he replied, an impish smile crooking his lips. "There should be no need for me to attempt the impossible."

"Wei Wuxian." At that moment he sounded so much like Jiang Cheng that it made Wei Wuxian laugh. Nie Mingjue surprised him however with what he said next. "As if you could help yourself."

It was a fair assessment.

It was just that Nie Mingjue had never really bothered to share his insight before. Not like you would with someone you wanted to know better, get closer to. He felt himself being watched but when Wei Wuxian glanced at him, Nie Mingjue was facing away. It had been like this for a while. It felt like a tentative brush of fingers, expectant of a touch that never followed. Not yet.

"That's right, I'm not cut from a pliant wood." Wei Wuxian smiled to himself. It was alright. It didn't have to be all at once. For now this was enough. "Alright then. I solemnly swear that I will be on my best behavior. I will conduct myself properly and embarrass neither my husband nor my sect. How does that sound?"

Nie Mingjue didn't honor that with a reply beyond a long suffering sigh.

They reached the top of the stairs, the family of the Chief cultivator coming into view. Wei Wuxian's jaw ached with the effort he had to put behind his smile. He was pretty sure Nie Mingjue was facing a similar predicament. But at least they weren't the only ones.

"Your Excellency. Jin-furen." Nie Mingjue saluted and the entourage followed his example. "Jin-gongzi. San-di."

The Jins for their part looked like those contrived smiles hurt them more than his own hurt him.

"Nie-zongzhu, Nie-er-gongzi," Jin Guangshan greeted them with all the haughtiness he seemed to believe appropriate as his title of chief cultivator. Then, freezing minutely, he slowly turned that pained upturn of lips towards him. "Nie-fujun." It sounded like he was grinding pepper between his teeth. "Welcome to Jinlintai."

Wei Wuxian beamed at him. "Thank you for your kind welcome, Jin-zongzhu."

"You look well, da-ge," Jin Guangyao offered them a dimpled smile, as his eyes assessed every single twitch in Nie Mingjue's features, like he was looking for something he couldn't find. Wei Wuxian smirked.

Before any of them could have said something else the third Jin of the welcome wagon – Jin Zi-something, Wei Wuxian knew – spoke. "Wei Wuxian! How dare you show yourself here?! You sure have no shame!"

Wei Wuxian's eyebrows shot up in surprise. "I beg your pardon?"

"You will beg for more than that!" Jin Zi-what's-his-face shouted and all that Wei Wuxian was able to offer in turn was a confused and increasingly annoyed, "Huh?!"

Every forsaken time. Each visit to Jinlintai some idiot or another accused him of some stupid shit…

"Jin-gongzi." The deep voice stopped his trail of thought, and Wei Wuxian could see from his peripheral vision the eye roll that Nie Mingjue hid behind closed lids. Wei Wuxian wondered if he learned that from Jiang Cheng. "Has my husband caused you any grievance?"

He didn't sound like he was asking to make amends.

"Grievance!" Jin Zi-whatever worked his jaw and if looks alone could kill, Wei Wuxian would consider himself assassinated. "You demon," Jin Zi-irrelevant seethed. "You curse me then make me look foolish in my own house!"

"Curse you?!" Wei Wuxian exclaimed, among the sounds of admonishment mainly from Jin-furen, but before he could have said anything, a deep rumble not unlike one of an angry beast sounded from beside him.

"Jin Zixun." Nie Mingjue's deep voice rumbled, just on the edge of surly. "If you wish to voice a complaint, do so now, but I will not stand baseless accusations to any member of my house, nor my sect." If there was one thing that could be said about Nie Mingjue it was that no matter what, once you were his, you were his. Wei Wuxian admired that level of integrity, although it weighed strangely heavy in his stomach. Like Jiang Cheng's look had felt upon his first visit to the Burial Mounds.

"Zixun." Jin Guangyao turned to his short-tempered relative. "Maybe we should discuss this in peace, once our guests have settled."

Jin Zixun, whose name Wei Wuxian was bound to forget before a minor shichen passed, only snorted at them, locking his judgmental gaze onto Wei Wuxian once more. "You sure knew how to marry, servant's son."

Before anyone could come up with a response to that, the peacock impression turned around with the most dramatic cape flare that Wei Wuxian had ever seen – and that was a list that included Jiang Cheng – and left.

"Zixun!" It was Jin-furen who called after him. "Zixun, come back this instant!" When it brought no reaction she turned to Jin Guangshan instead. "Won't you say anything?!"

Jin Guangshan, obviously wanting to be anywhere else but here, looked at her completely guileless, and Wei Wuxian swore he heard her click her tongue.

"Da-ge, Nie-fujun," Jin Guangyao spoke with a bow. "Please accept my most sincere apologies. I'm afraid Zixun has been rather unsettled lately. Jin-furen," he turned to her at last. "On da-ge's behalf, allow me to talk to Zixun."

She dismissed him with an impatient wave of her hand, the barest hint of acknowledgment, before turning back to him. Wei Wuxian beat her to it.

"Jin-furen," he said with a mild incline of his head. "Please don't trouble yourself. His words did not cause any harm. His insults were lies, and the one truth he spoke was not an insult. Truly, it doesn't bother me."

Most people wouldn't have believed him if he admitted this, but he had always liked Jin-furen, although it was clear as sunlight on a summer's day that she disliked him. In spite of her apparent antipathy towards him, she had never been truly rude. Not deferential, but not discourteous either. And she had always been kind and supportive of his shijie. Although it was worthy of mention that her tone had unmistakably improved once he had gained his new title.

She seemed to consider it for a moment, but finally let it go. "Nie-zongzhu," she said instead. "Perhaps it would be best if you took Nie-fujun to recover in private. My nephew has always been lacking in manners, I only hope you won't take offense in his words."

"Jin-furen, it is really not necessary," Wei Wuxian tried to protest. He was not weak of heart to let petty insults get the better of him. Words were only a blade if you let them cut and Wei Wuxian had no intention of doing Jin Zixun that favor.

"Nonsense, nonsense," Jin-furen insisted and motioned behind herself, where the disciples stood. Wei Wuxian's gaze followed the gesture, and he was pleasantly surprised when he spotted a familiar face. "Luo Qingyang can show you a room. I will send for tea."

He was too busy watching Mianmian approach them to further protest, as his husband bowed, his back a slight incline, at the madam. "Yes, Jin-furen, thank you."

They were led across the terrace to a smaller, more isolated courtyard surrounded by enclosures, apparently unused and perfectly private. Ideal for having a breakdown or throwing a fit, Wei Wuxian thought wryly, although he had no intention of granting Jin Zixun that favor either. Mianmian opened the door to the main room for them and Wei Wuxian smiled, feeling happy that there was at least one kind face left in the hostile sea.

"Luo Qingyang," he lilted. "I finally know your name."

She smiled at him, coy and bright, still not letting anyone bully her, not even him. "Nie-fujun," she teased right back. She hadn't changed. "I had to relearn yours."

Next to him he heard Nie Mingjue mumble at Huaisang, probably wondering how they knew each other but not sounding really surprised. He let Huaisang give a very shortened account from their studies at Gusu through to the events at the Wen Indoctrination, and gave his full attention instead to the only member of the Jin sect he considered a friend. He might have been tempted to counter her taunt if not for the fondness that overcame him. Once upon a time, in another world devoid of Wen Chao and Lan Zhan, where their eyes did not cast those deep shadows neither of them could hide, perhaps he would have entertained a thought in her direction. But that was the story of another him, a different version of a person he might have been in another world.

"That's right," he said, smiling now more to himself than her, but still easy and indulging. "Strange is this winding path that I walk." He hesitated only for a heartbeat before he let a more serious tone seep into his voice as he asked, "tell me, how have things been?"

Her smile turned sad and she shook her head. "You saw."

Wei Wuxian had never made peace with the peacock, but that did not mean there was no one to miss him.

"Ah, Luo-guniang," Nie Huaisang spoke, seizing his chance to step into their conversation. "Jin-gongzi seemed kinda rattled… It was hard for me to understand all of it. He mentioned a curse, what did he mean?"

Wei Wuxian resisted the urge to roll his eyes. As if there was any scandal Nie Huaisang's scheming mind couldn't comprehend, and heavens, why was any of it important?

"Nie-xiong," he said before Mianmian could answer. "As if there aren't as many people willing to curse a Jin as there are stars in the sky."

"Did you?"

The question came unexpected.

It knocked the wind right out of Wei Wuxian's lungs. He turned slowly, almost staggeringly to where it came from, as his mind caught up with the realness of it.

"Excuse me?" He asked, if only for a chance that his ear had played a trick on him.

No such luck.

"Don't play with me, Wei Wuxian." There was a sharpness to Nie Mingjue's voice that he only aimed at people he knew to be liars. "Did you do it?"

It felt like a cut.

"Of course not!" Wei Wuxian exclaimed, the volume of his voice surprising even him. Nie Mingjue opened his mouth to speak, frown creasing his forehead, but Wei Wuxian didn't let him interrupt this time. "Why would I curse that forsaken worm, I don't even know who he is!"

Nie Mingjue didn't look convinced.

"Wei-xiong," Nie Huaisang spoke too gently. "That was Jin-gongzi. Heir apparent to the Jin sect."

Wei Wuxian thought that was a rather tragic prospect but still didn't understand why he should be acquainted with the poor creature.

"You've met him on multiple occasions," Nie Huaisang answered the unspoken question of his raised eyebrow. "You've denounced him on each of those." If he behaved like that all the time, Wei Wuxian could see himself doing that, but it still didn't strike a chord. "Most prominently last year during the hunt on Phoenix Mountain. Apparently, he insulted you, and Jin-xiao-furen, back then still Jiang-guniang, asked him to apologize to you."

Oh. That bitch.

Wei Wuxian nodded, mind taken over by recognition. "I can see why someone would want to curse him. It still wasn't me!"

He said the last part to his husband but the man just kept frowning at him. Wei Wuxian wasn't even sure why it hurt.

"Despite how unfortunate all of this is," said Mianmian, "that at least should be easy to prove. Jin-gongzi was hit by the Curse of the Hundred Holes. They've reflected it back but still had no luck finding the culprit."

Wei Wuxian perked up at this. "The Curse of the Hundred Holes? As far as I know that's fatal."

"Within the year." Mianmian nodded. "There isn't much time left."

And was that not the most interesting thing?

"That's terrible for Jin-gongzi, of course, but good news for us." Nie Huaisang smiled, turning to his brother. "All that needs to be done to dispel these awful accusations is for da-ge to be your witness that there are no ugly holes on your chest…"

Nie Huaisang came short when the both of them visibly cringed.

"Da-ge?"

Wei Wuxian could feel his expression turning sour.

"Don't waste your breath, Nie-xiong," he said, and before he could stop himself his traitorous mouth moved again. "He'd have to take my clothes off first for that. Guess I'll be waiting for my execution."

"Wei Wuxian…"

He left.

He crossed the courtyard and almost upset the servant with the tray of fragrant tea, fragrant as only the blends of Lanling were, but didn't – couldn't – turn around even as he heard his name being called. It wasn't that he expected much from a political marriage. Not satisfaction, nor joy, or even content beyond the knowledge of his loved ones being safe. Definitely not love. In hindsight it seemed preposterous to ask for a smidgen of happiness. Oh, he had meant to put in the effort. But to be met with refusal so thorough, to be scorned in what couldn't be but disgust, to be held in such contempt of the person he was bound to for the rest of this life… He had not expected that either.

He had been a fool.

Not that any of that mattered in the grand scheme of things.

Speaking of which, he really needed to talk to Jiang Cheng…

His thoughts focused on everything other than his surroundings, it was to no one's surprise when he bumped into the first person around the corner.

"I apologize," he started but when his eyes focused he was met with a shock of pale blue and white, and a face etched of marble. "Lan Zhan!"

"Wei Ying," his soft voice said. "Are you alright?"

"Yes! Forgive me, I wasn't looking where I was going." Wei Wuxian waved it off, all at once warm with fondness over seeing another friendly face. He immediately moved on to more important questions. "What are you doing here? I thought you avoided cultivation conferences."

"I wanted to see you." It came without preamble and it stole Wei Wuxian's breath out of him. Again. It really figured that the other person with that ability besides his husband would be Lan Zhan. Ah, dangerous thoughts.

"Lan… Lan Zhan!" He could feel his face heat up at the simple, but powerful implication of his words, his chest tightening with something boreal, a sudden fatigue spinning his head. "You… You can't just say these things to a married man!" Lan Zhan, to his credit, at least had the decency to look down. "And you call me shameless!"

"Speak the truth," was Lan Zhan's plain answer.

"You and your Gusu rules…" Wei Wuxian muttered under his breath, but in spite of himself he could feel the tilt in the corners of his lips.

Before he could say anything else Lan Zhan asked, "How is Nie-zongzhu?"

Wei Wuxian almost sighed. Of course only Lan Zhan would so bluntly announce his devotion and remind him of Wei Wuxian's duty in the same breath.

"Well," he answered. "Better. Much better. Truly, I'd say he's fully recovered, he let Wen Qing examine him, can you imagine? Just a few moons ago I had to fight tooth and nail for him to allow it, it's incredible how he improved." Belatedly he realized he was rambling. He didn't stop himself. "It's all thanks to you Lan Zhan, seriously, I owe you…"

"Wei Ying."

His mouth all but snapped shut. Their eyes met.

"How are you?" Lan Zhan asked.

Wei Wuxian swallowed.

"I'm fine." He put the smile back on his face. "Of course I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be?"

Lan Zhan's only answer was looking. Looking, and seeing. Seeing, what exactly? Wei Wuxian swallowed again.

"Lan Zhan…"

"Wei Ying…"

They spoke at the same time. They fell silent simultaneously.

"Wei Ying." When Wei Wuxian didn't try again, Lan Zhan did.

Wei Wuxian didn't answer.

"Are there any news? About your sister?" Lan Zhan finally asked after a few stilted heartbeats. Wei Wuxian had the distinct feeling that wasn't what he had wanted to say, but was grateful all the same.

"Not that I'm aware of," he answered with a smile that couldn't have felt more fake. "But I do need to talk to my brother. You wouldn't happen to know if the delegation from Yunmeng arrived yet?"

"Mn," Lan Zhan hummed. "Shortly before Gusu Lan. We heard Jiang-zongzhu from the top of Jinlintai when we were arriving." Wei Wuxian couldn't help but laugh. Of course they had heard him! What else should he even expect at this point? "They ought to be at the banquet hall by now."

Wei Wuxian nodded at Lan Zhan, quietly thanking him for the information. "Well, I really shouldn't keep you, Lan Zhan. I'm going to find Jiang Cheng…" he said as he was turning to leave – to flee, really, from those keen, watchful eyes but Lan Zhan wasn't finished.

"The Nie sect allows it."

The quiet words froze him. "I'm sorry?"

"The Nie sect allows it," Lan Zhan repeated, looking straight at him. "Multiple spouses."

Wei Wuxian felt the hollow ache inside of him expand.

"It is not uncommon for them to take… companions explicitly meant for their spouses," Lan Zhan went on, while all Wei Wuxian could feel was ice. Ice-cold seeping emptiness. "It serves as a means to secure heirs while ensuring… the comfort of… everyone involved. It has been a tradition of Nie sect leaders for at least three…"

"No."

Finally a word.

A tiny spark of something more profound born from the barren depths of his ashen insides. Something like terror. Something like abhorrence.

He didn't know what expression he was making but it deepened a line around Lan Zhan's lips just barely enough for Wei Wuxian to notice. It twisted a feature around his eyes in the same minute manner. Wei Wuxian thought it was about the same breadth as between yearning and anguish, perhaps the same width as the edge of a sword. And yet, he couldn't cross it, that fine sharp line, couldn't make the tilt that would decide life over death.

"Lan Zhan…" he shook his head. "Do you know what you're offering?"

Lan Zhan's lips formed a thin line, carved by that sharp sword Wei Wuxian was wielding, but before he could reply, Wei Wuxian spoke again.

"That is no way for the second young master of Lan to be." Wei Wuxian swallowed around his tight throat. "Besides, even if it is a well-intentioned Nie tradition, it isn't one of Gusu Lan. Nor of Yunmeng Jiang."

Lan Zhan didn't stop looking at him. Wei Wuxian hoped he wouldn't start seeing as well, at the same time as wishing he would.

"Why do you think I'm a Wei, Lan Zhan?" Wei Wuxian's smile felt wistful around his lips as he held Lan Zhan's gaze. "When we of Yunmeng make a choice, we don't look for a backdoor. I believe you understand that better than anyone. And I… I choose my sect."

"Wei Ying…"

"I know." Wei Wuxian interrupted him again, incapable of listening to the sincere promises woven into every syllable of Lan Zhan's soft voice. No matter what his friend was about to say, Wei Wuxian needed to hear exactly none of it. "I know, Lan Zhan. I know you're offering me a loophole to happiness, but I can't accept it. You know why." He closed his eyes against the ardent look and drew a deep breath. It was as if he was back at the pier heavy with the scent of wilting lotuses, when he knew what he had to do, no matter how much it hurt.
.
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"I have weighed you Lan Zhan. I put you on the scales, you against what remains of my family, you against the welfare of my brother, the prosperity of my sect, the lives of the Wens. The truth, Lan Zhan, is that you weighed nothing at all."
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.

The irony of it was that Wei Wuxian knew Lan Zhan's heart as much as he knew his. He knew what would always come first and what would be left to be given. He smiled ruefully and fought to look at Lan Zhan again, bear that candid gaze and honor it.

"I thank you for your offer." He smiled. "For what it's worth, it made me happy. That you would be willing to do this for me against all your principles means a lot to me. However, that is also why I can't, under any circumstance, accept it. You know this Lan Zhan. I know you know." He paused, the tilt of his lips gaining a woeful edge. "And if you're honest, you know why you can't either."

The truth of it was, there had been time. The truth of it was, Lan Zhan was just as bound with obligations as Wei Wuxian was. No matter his heart, his duty had held him back. Only once someone else appeared to lift Wei Wuxian from the dirt back up had Lan Zhan dared to show he could do the same. Only once Wei Wuxian was spoken for had Lan Zhan dared to give his heart a voice. The truth of it was that Lan Zhan too had chosen his sect.

There was a brief moment when nothing happened.

Then, Lan Zhan nodded. "Mn."

It was grief as much as it was a relief.

"One life too short, are we?" Wei Wuxian muttered, laughing without humor. When Lan Zhan gave him a confused look, he shook his head. "Ah, it's nothing. Just… you know that saying... It takes a hundred lifetimes to meet on a boat…"

"And a thousand to share a pillow." Lan Zhan finished for him in recognition. There was a heartbeat of silence. "Next lifetime then."

Wei Wuxian laughed. "Lan Zhan, Lan Zhan, you old fuddy duddy…"

"Wei Ying." Lan Zhan stayed serious.

"Lan Zhan…" Wei Wuxian looked at him, ready to protest, but Lan Zhan wouldn't have it.

"You spoke about choices. This is mine." Lan Zhan looked at him without give. "You have not misled me. You have not deceived me. You have spoken honestly about what you could and could not give. I still wish to make this choice. Keep me as your friend. If I cannot be by your side, let me have your shadow."

Brightest flowers bloomed in shadows, was it?

"Aiya, Lan Zhan… It's not like I can stop you." Wei Wuxian sighed, then smiled. "I always liked being your friend."

"Mn." Lan Zhan nodded.

They shared a smile.

"I should…" Wei Wuxian found his voice strangely high, like a dizi out of tune. He cleared his throat. "I should find my brother. Banquet hall, you said?"

"Mn."

Wei Wuxian waited. Nothing more came. Nothing else was left.

"Right. I should…" He trailed off. Tried again. "I'll go. I… I'll see you around, Lan Zhan."

"Mn."

It took him a surprisingly short amount of time to find the banquet hall, considering the last time he had set foot in it he hadn't exactly stayed for long. Although it had all worked out in the end, there was still a part of him that wished to forget all of Jinlintai. Now more so than ever.

It took only a moment to spot the Jiang contingent, bright purples and indigos standing out between all the marble and gold.

"Jiang Cheng!" He called out and the next several moments were filled with cheerful greetings and teasing bows, as his former shidi and shimei – what little was left of them – descended on him with cheers.

They still looked up to him. They still called him da-shixiong, albeit it was now a fond memory of the past instead of his legitimate title. None of them knew how close to falling apart all of that had come. They didn't know about the duel he and Jiang Cheng had scheduled when their stalemate reached its breaking point a year ago. Jiang Cheng couldn't have tolerated his open rebellion without weakening his already fragile position among the sect leaders. Wei Wuxian couldn't abandon the Wens to die. If Nie Huaisang hadn't made his proposition at the time he had made it, things would have turned out very differently. In hindsight, probably much worse, for everyone involved.

They exchanged pleasantries and he let the disciples tease him for a while before he pulled Jiang Cheng away into something he hoped to be a little more private conversation – as private as conversations inside the banquet hall of Jinlintai could be – and listened as Jiang Cheng relayed the latest news.

"Dongying," he repeated. "How reliable is this source?"

Jiang Cheng scowled. "As reliable as the one that claimed the ship they boarded was headed to Dongning, or the one that said not a ship, but a caravan headed either north to Choson, or south towards Xian. The only thing they seem to agree on is they left the country."

"They're fleeing," Wei Wuxian voiced in a whisper what he had suspected for weeks now. "And covering their tracks."

"It sure does look like it." Jiang Cheng's frown deepened. "I just don't understand why. And why wouldn't they tell us? Why wouldn't jiejie come to us? Why would she…"

Wei Wuxian squeezed his arm.

"Why would she leave Jin Ling behind?" Jiang Cheng didn't stop his outburst, but he did lower his voice. "I don't understand it. She has Jin Ling, makes sure he's patently placed in my care should she or Jin Zixuan be unable, packs up and leaves with her husband in tow? I don't understand it!"

He yelled the last part, causing Wei Wuxian to wince, then promptly direct a smile to the several curious glances they have attracted and pull Jiang Cheng further away.

"I don't know," he told Jiang Cheng. It was only a partial lie. "But she's with the peacock, which, as much as it pains me to admit, is a good sign. She didn't seem to have been taken against her will and it appears they are seeking safety instead of running from danger. Before you say it, there is a difference. At the very least she seems to be safe for now."

His words seemed to assure Jiang Cheng enough to calm his temper. Not enough to ignore his deflection.

"You know something." Jiang Cheng looked him dead in the eye. Wei Wuxian swallowed out of old habit. His brother, unfortunately, noticed. "Wei Wuxian! If you know something about my sister..."

"Jiang Cheng!" Wei Wuxian hissed and looked around. There were some people looking their way, but no one seemed too important. If his shijie was seeking safety as far as foreign lands then Wei Wuxian would not allow himself or Jiang Cheng be the reasons she wouldn't find it. A chill down his spine told him there were keen eyes on them, but when he turned there was only Nie Mingjue sharing what seemed like a pleasant talk with his sworn brothers. Lan Xichen was wearing a look of delight mixed with awe, while Jin Guangyao smiled his dimpled smile. Wei Wuxian narrowed his eyes.

"Say, Jiang Cheng," he said, his look never leaving the venerated triad. "Do you know who Jin Zixun is?"

"What kind of question is that?" Lianfang-zun's gaze flickered briefly towards them, but faltered when he caught Wei Wuxian looking. Wei Wuxian gave him an easy smile. Jin Guangyao returned it without fail, and turned his attention back to Lan Xichen. "Of course I know who…" That was when Wei Wuxian finally looked at Jiang Cheng.

His brother paused, and all Wei Wuxian could do was watch his face as the pieces seemed to fall in place. Jiang Cheng may have been brash, but his sense of politics was second to none. In that brief moment he had probably pieced together what Wei Wuxian had taken months to discern. He shared that with Huaisang.

"Of course I know who Jin Zixun is," Jiang Cheng finally said, then after a moment rephrased it. He did that when he wanted to bring a point across. "I am painfully aware who he is." He didn't quite look, but his head made a slight incline to where the three zun were still conferring.

"Great," Wei Wuxian said and smiled broadly, then promptly changed the subject. "Funny story, did you know he accused me of cursing him?"

Jiang Cheng, predictably, exploded.

"He did what?!"

Wei Wuxian wanted to laugh about it, wave it off and gloat about being notorious, but then of all people present in the hall Nie Mingjue caught his look. Did you, it reverberated in Wei Wuxian's head. Would Jiang Cheng ask the same? Would he too believe that Wei Wuxian…

"Has he gone completely mad?!" The utter disbelief in Jiang Cheng's voice broke through the tightness in Wei Wuxian's chest and returned his breath in the form of a few short barks of laughter. "That's not funny!" His brother insisted. "The sheer insolence! You're the husband of a sect leader, for heaven's sake, have the Jins surrendered their face to conceit or has all the gold melted it away?! I swear, if he crosses my sight, that pheasant will never walk again!"

"Pheasant?" Wei Wuxian raised his eyebrows at him, lips crooked upward.

"Almost peacock," Jiang Cheng clarified with a scoff. "Would like to be one but I'll have him for dinner."

Wei Wuxian couldn't help it. He bent in his waist, shaking with laughter. He laughed because it felt good to laugh, laugh at a joke his little brother has made. All the tension of the last weeks was washed away by the storm of Jiang Cheng's anger, while the pure, simple faith of his little brother akin to a fresh breeze brought nothing but joy.

"It's not funny!!!" Jiang Cheng insisted once more and Wei Wuxian waved him off.

"No, that would be you! Yes, fine, you're right, I know, I know, it's just that..." he held up his hands in defense when he saw the face Jiang Cheng made, even as he spoke between giggles. When he finally caught his breath and looked at Jiang Cheng again, a genuine smile split his face in half. "It's so good to see you."

Almost. He had almost lost this.

Even after they canceled their mock duel that was supposed to cut their ties, things between them have been tense.
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"Both, you and Nie-zongzhu are weak alone against Jin Guangshan. But if you form an alliance, you can make a stable counterbalance to his power. I would be happy to be the bridge between the two of you, all I ask is that you shelter the Wens. I promise I won't ask anything of you ever again. Just this once, Jiang Cheng, I ask you as my brother."
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Jiang Cheng had been only slightly less disdained to lose him to Nie Mingjue than to the 'treacherous Wens', but in the end he had taken the increase in power that an alliance with the Unclean Realm provided, and the influx in population and following growth of economy that came with the Wen remnants. Most of them were knowledgeable in either horticulture, pharmacy or medicine, and after the Sunshot campaign there was a huge gap left in those industries for both production and trade. It had been what ultimately saved the Jiang sect, resurfacing a year ago like lotuses rising from the mud.

Today, Wei Wuxian said, "you should visit Qinghe sometime."

Today, Jiang Cheng regarded him with a long, searching look, worrying his lips in that minute fashion that told Wei Wuxian of trapped words he didn't dare to speak. "Are you…" He summoned the courage. "Is he… How are things in Qinghe?"

"Thank you, Jiang Cheng." Wei Wuxian smiled. "Everything's alright."

"Is it?" Jiang Cheng almost looked doubtful, scowling with more creases between his eyebrows than his age should allow.

"Of course!" Wei Wuxian answered by widening his smile into a grin. "Why wouldn't it be?"

Back then what Jiang Cheng had wanted him to do, what Wei Wuxian had promised to do – help train the new generation of Jiang disciples – he could do no longer, but if he could help the Jiang sect regain their former power in any other way, he would do it no matter the cost. It was the only thing he could still do for his brother, and it ended up being the last thing he had done for him. After that he would have been happy to become the useless decoration at his husband's side, but Nie Mingjue had needed him. He had needed something only Wei Wuxian could provide and Wei Wuxian still had ways left to be useful.

In its essence, it all had been a very easy deal.

It may have cost a lot, but now he was finally reaping the fruits of his labor.

Nie Mingjue had regained both his senses and his health, Lotus Pier had risen as the most important trade center, Lanling could no longer take as many liberties as they could after the defeat of the Wen sect and Wei Wuxian could finally rest. Watch his best friend and his family live their lives. Raise his son. Against all of that, even with the dull ache of his encounter with Lan Zhan and the sharp hurt of Nie Mingjue's words still fresh in mind, he knew nothing could have ever measured up.

"They better be." Despite his words, Jiang Cheng was still looking at him like he was torn between knowing better than to believe him and wanting to have faith in him. Finally finding resolve, he declared, "If he's not treating you right, just tell me and I'll break his legs!"

Wei Wuxian had no doubt in his mind that Jiang Cheng absolutely would attempt to break Nie Mingjue's legs. Wei Wuxian very much preferred his little brother alive.

"Jiang Cheng," he said as chidingly as he could muster, sneaking one arm around his shidi's shoulders. "You should know better than to threaten your biggest allies." He waggled his index finger at him, with the best grin plastered on his face. He considered his maneuver a success when Jiang Cheng rolled his eyes. "Besides, everything's perfect. For real."

All things considered, Wei Wuxian was not unhappy.

He missed his sister.

He would have liked a relationship with his husband.

But his sister was safe, and that was more important than the selfish desire to have her presence in his life. As for his husband… Things weren't ideal, but recently Wei Wuxian found himself nursing a hope that they could be… Something, in due time. Winter was upon them, but Wei Wuxian put his faith into spring, when rabbits emerged and flowers bloomed.

"Good." Jiang Cheng looked at him. "I prefer you to be someone else's to worry about."

"Shut up, will you?!" Wei Wuxian swatted him. He may have been a sect leader now, but that didn't mean Wei Wuxian didn't retain at least some big brother privileges.

It was at the same moment that Nie Mingjue's chuckle echoed the bright walls followed by a declaration louder than necessary for a private conversation.

"Thank you. I have been in very good care."

It caused several people to look in his direction, just in time to watch his gaze settle on Wei Wuxian with an upward quirk to his lips and a hand outstretched in invitation.

Wei Wuxian's heart turned over, aching in a funny way, clenching and unclenching once. He excused himself to Jiang Cheng with a salute, put a pleasant smile on his face, and strode towards his husband, reaching out.

Chapter Text

"Nie Mingjue, Zewu-jun, Lianfang-zun," Wei Wuxian greeted the three as he took the hand his husband was extending and bowed his head in polite greeting to the other two. "It's good to see you both." He turned to Jin Guangyao, saluting. "Thank you for earlier, and please extend my thanks to Jin-furen as well."

"Oh no, not at all." Lianfang-zun shook his head in carefully measured politeness. "Consider it a token of my gratitude for taking such good care of da-ge. It might be apt to call what Nie-fujun managed to achieve… A miracle."

Their eyes met. They both flashed their smiles, Jin Guangyao his dimpled one, Wei Wuxian the one that hurt.

"That's right!" Wei Wuxian declared, bright and cheerful. "Me and Nie-xiong have been playing for him every day. Isn't that right, zhangfu?"

He made himself sound playful and happy, like a good spouse should feel at the recovery of their partner, but when his gaze landed on Nie Mingjue, his husband's face was anything but. It startled him.

"Indeed, you have," he said without an ounce of jest, looking straight into Wei Wuxian's eyes, every single inch of him sincere. "I owe you both my life."

Wei Wuxian's heart suddenly drummed out a marching tune, quick and effervescent. He could hear it in his ears, a dizzying beat. He had not expected that. He looked away before he swooned, somehow remembering to pull the smile back up. He felt heat in his face, but he couldn't fight it, so he just let it color him the shade of a ripe peach. He supposed it wasn't an inappropriate reaction for a newlywed, which he technically, by all standards of society, still was.

"That's right, you do!" He managed to say with a surprisingly confident chuckle and succeeded in looking back at Jin Guangyao to drive the point home, red-faced as he was.

"It truly is remarkable." Thank the heavens for Lan Xichen, still appearing to be busy with overcoming his bewilderment, thus distracting everyone from Wei Wuxian's discomfiture. "I owe you an apology, Wei-daren. You asked for my advice. I crudely misjudged the situation."

Wei Wuxian saw Jin Guangyao's already strained smile freeze in place, his eyes searching Wei Wuxian's face fervently. Wei Wuxian kept on smiling, feeling it pull at his eyelids.

Nie Mingjue, for his part, was looking at Lan Xichen with an odd expression that felt achingly familiar. If he gave it some thought, Wei Wuxian was sure he would find a lot of things to hold against Lan Xichen, mistakes and bad decisions to lord over him. But even then he would find no flaw that he himself didn't have in spades. Could he really fault Lan Xichen for something as innocent as believing? Lan Xichen had never been unkind to him, why should Wei Wuxian be so harsh in his judgment now?

"You don't owe me anything of the kind, Zewu-jun," he thus said with a far easier and truer smile, as he turned to the leader of the Lan. "You acted to the best of your knowledge. I cannot hold that against you."

Lan Xichen shook his head in those incremental turns so typical for him, yet managed to convey the gravity of his words.

"Master Wei, I am very grateful that da-ge has you."

Wei Wuxian felt his face flush yet again although with an emotion completely different from embarrassment, albeit less for the meaning of the words than the one who spoke them. The weight of them came heavier when said by Lan Xichen.
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"At least I'm not the only one in Qinghe whose heart resides in Gusu."
.
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Unfortunately Wei Wuxian couldn't allow himself to be dissolved into a humble puddle just yet. He had to focus. There was still something he had to say.

"Not at all," he said, turning to Jin Guangyao. Then, considering his words meticulously, he spoke. "It's all thanks to Lianfang-zun's instruction. Had he not taught us the score, I'm afraid I would have been a widower by now. You have my gratitude, Lianfang-zun."

When Wei Wuxian came up from his bow he found Jin Guangyao's expression to be fascinatingly full of dread. Not that his smile had faltered a single inch, but Wei Wuxian found that once you saw you couldn't unsee.

"It would be preposterous to claim all that credit after all the care Nie-fujun took of da-ge," Jin Guangyao said carefully. "I am afraid I have been neglectful in the last months. I shall find time to come and play for da-ge soon."

"That won't be necessary." Wei Wuxian all but grinned. "We would hate to steal your time more, especially since zhangfu is doing so well. I'm sure all of the insecurity around the line of succession is keeping you terribly busy."

He could have sworn Jin Guangyao suppressed a flinch, but he saved it with another smile.

"I'm sorry, I'm not sure what you mean…" Jin Guangyao pulled the guileless expression off really well.

"I apologize." Wei Wuxian gestured in what he hoped was a believably unsure manner, his chuckle mildly awkward. "I'm afraid I'm terribly naive in these matters. Luo-guniang was kind enough to explain the situation to us. I was shocked to hear about your cousin. Such a cruel fate, and so shortly after Jin Zixuan…" He was keenly aware of not only Nie Mingjue's but Lan Xichen's eyes on him as well. Good. Attention gotten. Jin Guangyao looked like retaining his smile cut him to pieces. "Although with the last of the Zi-generation in such peril, I do wonder who might be next in line."

Their eyes met.

For a tense moment there was nothing but silence and the daggers of their smiles pointed at each other.

Then Jin Guangyao chuckled lightly. Wei Wuxian applauded the achievement.

"Nie-fujun shouldn't concern himself with the matters of the Jin." He saluted with his back bowed. "I thank you for your worry, but Nie-fujun needs to focus on da-ge's health first and foremost. After all, should Nie-fujun show too much concern to the matters of Lanling, people might wonder why he worried so much."

Ah, there it was.

"A-Yao," Lan Xichen spoke up, voice drawn and oddly hesitant, very unlike its usual succinctness. "What do you mean?"

Jin Guangyao looked so terribly uncomfortable with the question that Wei Wuxian was baffling over how people ever believed such convoluted mannerisms.

To Wei Wuxian's surprise, Nie Mingjue spoke up before Jin Guangyao had the chance to answer. "Are you suggesting that Qinghe is somehow involved in what goes on in Lanling?"

"I'm not suggesting anything, da-ge!" Jin Guangyao defended immediately. "I'm just saying that all people have tongues, and they use them for talking. It's regretful, but all that Jin Zixun believes, others might as well. Especially if the true culprit is not found soon."

Something in his voice suggested to Wei Wuxian that day would never dawn.

Not that it was surprising, all things considered.

"Surely the Jin don't believe that the Nie would harbor a coward and a murderer?" Nie Mingjue seemed to have taken great offense to what his sworn brother had implied, although Wei Wuxian wasn't sure why. To most of the cultivation world he was both, and Nie Mingjue had never been someone to withhold his judgment. "More than that, surely Jin Guangshan does not believe I would have married such a person."

But he had, hadn't he?

He did, however, sound like he had a point he wanted to make. Whatever it was, Wei Wuxian could only watch in morbid curiosity as it unfolded in front of him.

"My father doesn't believe anything," Jin Guangyao said, and in a small part of his mind that wasn't distracted by the storm clouds on Nie Mingjue's face, Wei Wuxian had to admit that was a fair point. "I only meant to say that without any proof, people will talk senselessly."

Jin Guangyao didn't look like he knew what was happening either – which was an achievement in and of itself, and Lan Xichen looked seconds away from negotiating between the two of them. Wei Wuxian decided his husband at least deserved back up if he went as far as defending his honor.

"Proof?!" He raised both of his eyebrows and jutted his lips in what he thought to be appropriately affronted. "Surely you're not expecting me to strip for Jin-zongzhu?"

Not that he was shy, or cared an ounce about propriety, but he also didn't feel like he had anything to prove to Jin Guangshan of all people. Besides, before that happened, that lecher had to first step around Nie Mingjue. Surely, the sect leader of Nie wouldn't like it very much if the one who first got to see the husband of Nie's naked chest was sect leader Jin. Not to mention the other implications it would infer.

"Are you calling me a liar?" Sure enough, Nie Mingjue interjected again even before Jin Guangyao could reply. "As his husband, do you think I wouldn't notice ten dozen holes in his chest?"

"No such thing, da-ge." Jin Guangyao shook his head in a manner Wei Wuxian realized was similar to Lan Xichen. "However, people believe what they want to believe. They would never accuse the famous Chifeng-zun of lying, but they might accuse the, ah, what title are they using now? Demon of Qinghe, I believe it was. They might accuse the Demon of Qinghe of deception."

"Are you calling him a liar?" Nie Mingjue countered immediately.

"I wouldn't dare to, da-ge! How could you say that?" Wei Wuxian almost believed him the newborn lamb, so it wasn't a surprise when Lan Xichen looked between them, torn and confused yet silently assessing. "I'm merely saying that the people might."

"Da-ge, a-Yao, perhaps it would be best if…" Lan Xichen didn't get to finish.

"Then why don't you tell those people?" Nie Mingjue raised his voice infinitesimally and for a moment Wei Wuxian marveled at how untouchable he looked. "That the Unclean Realm resides at the foot of a mountain, because it doesn't look down on people. To be able to look down on the people within its walls, you'll have to climb the mountain. Although, you might also like to remind them that the last person to try that was Wen Chao. I believe you need no reminding that the person who brought Wen Chao down is standing right in front of you."

There was the flutter and the heat again, as Wei Wuxian blushed once more. It wasn't that he thought his victory humble, but from the mouth of Nie Mingjue, acknowledgment humbled you. He was busy finding his voice to counter with a joke and hopefully put an end to this dreadful conversation, so he didn’t notice Nie Huaisang and Jiang Cheng approach until the latter spoke.

"More like 'completely slaughtered him'. Truly, it was satisfying to watch." Seriously, for all his sense of politics, Jiang Cheng had the subtlety of an artillery unit in an open field. "We apologize for disturbing your conversation, but I believe the banquet is about to begin. We should get to our tables," he clarified, and then, with that wonderful subtlety of a catapult bombarding whichever fool stood against it, he deemed it necessary to add, graceful as a toad flung against a tree, "Yunmeng Jiang is, naturally, seated next to the Nie sect."

Wei Wuxian loved him. Although he almost died forcing back the startled laugh that it managed to steal from him.

He felt his smile broaden, even as he remembered that dark night that had been darker to Jiang Cheng than he admitted to just now. Not that either of them had shed a single tear over Wen Chao, but through the black fog of screaming resentment, the piercing shame of facing Lan Zhan, and the blind relief of seeing his little brother well and unharmed, Wei Wuxian still remembered the way Jiang Cheng had looked at him upon their reunion. He still appreciated the save and recognized the opening, an opportunity too good to pass.

"All of that is true," Wei Wuxian said, turning everyone's attention back to him as he caught Jin Guangyao's gaze and smiled toothily. "I skinned Wen Chao alive and threw him for the pigs to feast on."

Well, one pig. A human-shaped ghost pig named Wang Lingjiao.

Jin Guangyao looked at him like he couldn't tell whether he was joking. Nie Huaisang seemed to find this amusing, as he fanned himself, chuckling in polite amusement.

"Wei-xiong has the best stories." Wei Wuxian took note that he didn't remark on the alleged veracity of said stories. "The Nie sect is honored to have him!"

"Truly an honor, to the Unclean Realm and to all of Qinghe." In all honesty, the praises were starting to get under his skin. Wei Wuxian wasn't sure where all the respect was coming from, if not even a shichen ago Nie Mingjue suspected him of deceit. One thing his husband would never be found guilty of was duplicity, hence Wei Wuxian's puzzlement. Luckily, he didn't get enough of an opportunity to wallow in it, as Nie Mingjue seemed to consider the conversation thus concluded. "Now, if you'll excuse us, Xichen, Guangyao, we should go sit down."

A few more polite phrases and promises to talk again later Wei Wuxian let himself be pulled along out of earshot before turning to Jiang Cheng. He decidedly was not looking at Nie Mingjue, as he finally let the laugh he'd held back bubble up.

"Seriously? 'Yunmeng Jiang is seated next to Nie'?"

Jiang Cheng shrugged. "They can use a reminder about who's family and who isn't."

Wei Wuxian smirked. "Technically, Lianfang-zun is your family as well."

"Our family, Wei Wuxian." Jiang Cheng corrected him, even as he made an expression like one would when they had their arm ripped off. "He's our family."

"Nope." Wei Wuxian was shaking his head even before Jiang Cheng finished. "All yours."

"Not how it works, shixiong." There were teeth to Jiang Cheng's smile now and Wei Wuxian barely resisted the urge to pinch his cheeks like he used to do when his little brother got cheeky with him. Sect leaders didn't get their cheeks pinched. Not in public, at least.

He was about to retaliate with a witty remark of his own, when Nie Huaisang declared, "I have eyes on the alcohol!"

"Great!" Wei Wuxian exclaimed, feeling his smile crinkle his eyes. "How much am I allowed to drink?"

"Wei Wuxian!" Jiang Cheng, to no one's surprise, erupted. "I swear if you embarrass…"

He didn't get to finish.

"A bowl."

They all turned their surprised gazes to the unexpected source of that answer.

Nie Mingjue turned to them but his eyes locked with Wei Wuxian's.

"That's how much I need after all of that," he muttered, making a vague gesture to where they left Lan Xichen and Jin Guangyao behind. It startled another laugh out of Wei Wuxian. Before he could think of anything to reply, Nie Mingjue added, "Besides, we're still technically honeymooning. It's about time we have some fun. I reckon a full bowl of drink is a good place to start."

Wei Wuxian threw his head back and laughed. His back arched with it, turning his body upwards, rattling with the echo of his voice.

"Fun!" He shrieked. "Oh, if you discover fun now, I might die a happy man! Seriously a full bowl?!"

"As I said." Nie Mingjue smirked – oh, had he always looked so sexy when he smirked? – and nodded.

"Excellent!" Nie Huaisang exclaimed, looking like he'd been gifted the rarest painting of all. "If we get Wangji-xiong to join us it will be just like old times!"

Wei Wuxian wanted to remind him that it would never really be like 'the old times' anymore, because he was married now and expected to keep a certain decorum and, ah, bedtime – and what did he mean by 'old' exactly, it had been barely a few years, – but he was too busy finding out that Nie Mingjue's eyes were painted in all the hues of the autumn forest, so it was Jiang Cheng once more to do it for him.

"Lan-er-gongzi passes out after one cup of wine!" Jiang Cheng protested. "I am not interested in dragging him back to his room, and I know you won't help me with it."

He didn't point out how Wei Wuxian – formerly the one in charge of hauling everyone back safely to their respective beds, with moderate levels of success – obviously wouldn't help him either anymore.

"Not fair Jiang-xiong! We're allies now! How can you say that? Of course I'll help!" Nie Huaisang insisted, then hooked his arm into Jiang Cheng's elbow to pull him along. "Don't worry, it will be fine, it will be fine. Come on!"

He let Nie Huaisang drag his brother away as he succumbed to the incessant gaze of his husband.
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"It is true that you're not my first choice. I know I'm not yours either. That however does not mean the choice itself has to be a bad one. If possible, I would like try at least for a little happiness."
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Maybe… Maybe they hadn’t reached a common ground in this steep climb of what should be a relationship. Neither of them were there just yet. But now at least Wei Wuxian felt like they might be facing each other, at the distant edges of the same plateau.

"We have to talk," Nie Mingjue said after what must have been an eternity.

"I think that's a conversation I have to be drunk for." Wei Wuxian smiled lopsided, but nodded his assent.

They were both on their way.

Nie Mingjue's own smile was nothing if not wry. "Better get started then."

In the end they didn't have that kind of talk, although they both ended up drunk, and whilst Wei Wuxian hadn't hauled back Lan Zhan to his room, he did end up helping Nie Mingjue to theirs, along with the bragging rights to successfully outdrinking the famous Qifeng-zun. Barely. It had been a late night and an even later morning, the both of them barely coherent for the former, and too busy pretending to be put together for the latter to have any semblance of a meaningful talk. The rest of their time was filled with less meaningful talks deemed more important by all the other sect leaders, such as trade deals or the ongoing issue of Xue Yang.

Ultimately, they didn't talk much at all that second day.

In fact, it wasn't until the afternoon of the third day of their stay at Jinlintai that they exchanged more than polite phrases and the occasional sardonic comment at the expense of one of the Jins.

Jin Zi-whoops-forgot-his-name-again had, of course, not said his last, and more and more Jin Guangshan's own displeasure, with not only Wei Wuxian and seemingly every resident of the Unclean Realm but also his illegitimate son, became apparent.

It all escalated when Jin Zi-Wei-Wuxian-didn't-really-care-at-this-point had once again voiced his baseless accusations, this time in front of not only the Nie sect, but the entire assembly, prompting Nie Mingjue to demand an apology directly from Jin Guangshan. To which the chief cultivator had replied it would be much easier to believe in Wei Wuxian's words, if Wei Wuxian surrendered at least a part of the shards of the Stygian Tiger Seal from the vault of Qinghe to the vault of Lanling. Nie Mingjue swiftly retaliated to that saying he might be more amenable to consider such a thing if Jin Guangshan finally dealt with Xue Yang in a manner appropriate to a murderer.

Wei Wuxian left after Jin Guangyao and Lan Xichen got involved and did what he always did during any kind of storm: He found a quiet place to wait till the thunder stopped clapping. Part of him selfishly wished he could still crawl into the bed with Jiang Cheng and cuddle for warmth, but alas – shijie's lotus pond had to do for now. Although the cold water soaking his clothes had nothing to do with warmth, the chore he took on himself was a familiar routine, grounding in its simplicity.

After two days of sect politics, harvesting lotus seeds was a delightfully uncomplicated task.

"This is where you've been hiding." The now familiar voice of Nie Mingjue didn't startle him. He'd felt the dark eyes on him for a while, a while that has been longer than the time he'd been standing there. Longer than one night and a day, even.

"I'll say this." He turned, basket full of lotus heads, green dotted chalices of abundance. "The only way he can have the shards is over my dead, cold body and even then he'll still have to fight my vengeful ghost. And no, I don't care what Zewu-jun, Lianfang-zun or my brother say. I refuse."

"Agreed." Now that startled him, although it maybe shouldn't have. Nie Mingjue stepped down from the hallway and into the courtyard. "He'll have to step over mine first." He paused. "But it seems he tried that already."

Again, those seeing eyes.

Wei Wuxian held the basket a little closer.

"I know neither of us had a drink yet today, but…" Nie Mingjue started. "Can we talk?"

"I guess there's a lot we do need to talk about." Wei Wuxian snorted, bending down to pick another head. "Where would my husband like to begin?"

"With an apology."

Wei Wuxian froze, hand hovering just above the clear surface.

"Whatever for?" He asked, wary.

"I was unkind," Nie Mingjue answered, candid. "Although you were always courteous with me. I distrusted you, although you never gave me any reason to. I accused you without ascertaining the truth of those accusations. It wasn't fair to you. For this I am truly sorry. And while I know that not all will be fixed by an apology, I would like it to be a start."

"The start of what?" Wei Wuxian asked, unsure. He didn't quite know what to think of it, or what name to give the feelings currently twisting his stomach into intricate knots.

"A good marriage." Again an answer most modest, unadorned and unembellished with silver tongues and golden phrases, yet so loud and profound that Wei Wuxian barely heard his own sharp intake of breath. "You have no obligation to me, beyond the purpose of the alliance, but there are things I need you to know. You don't have to believe or acknowledge any of it. If you wish to forget all of it, I will accept that too. All I ask is that you hear me out. Will you?"

Only when he nodded, a slight incline of head that Lan Xichen would have been proud of, did Nie Mingjue continue. "The truth is, I owe you a great debt, Wei Wuxian, and I know I have no right to ask for more."

"You owe me nothing." His mouth moved before his head told him it was rude to interrupt. "It's my debt that can never be repaid."

"You saved my life," Nie Mingjue rebuked. "I consider it fairly squared."

Their eyes met, and Wei Wuxian felt his heart beat in an erratic rhythm. There was a pause, a silence burdened by the heavy weight of a horrible truth, like the cold water weighing down the fabric of his clothes. He shivered, but didn't move, couldn't move, frozen by the ice in his bones. It was Nie Mingjue who pulled him out, thick fingers encircling his elbows warm with the heat of liquid gold.

"I may be rash Wei Wuxian, but I am not stupid," Nie Mingjue finally said, their eyes inches away. "I know I was dying. Guangyao played for me. Huaisang played for me. Yet, I was getting worse. You show up, with herbs and tonics only the Dafan Wens can make and the progress slows down. Then, all of a sudden, you pack up and leave for Gusu. When you come back, I get better. What conclusion would you draw?"

"You know it then?" Wei Wuxian looked away, absentmindedly wiping the wet chill in his hands against the part of his clothes that was dry, purposefully ignoring the hoarseness in Nie Mingjue's voice.

"It was the only explanation that made sense." Wei Wuxian couldn't bear to look at him. "Two days ago. When you challenged him, I knew for certain."

In his heart Wei Wuxian had hoped that somehow Nie Mingjue wouldn't hear the difference in the music, wouldn't draw the inevitable conclusion, wouldn't realize the betrayal of the one he had put his trust in one more time. His shoulders slumped with a sigh as he sat down at the edge of the pond, idle hands wrapping around a lotus head without his command, deft fingers scraping out the seeds without a single thought. Uncomplicated. Easy.

Easier than pretending that there wasn't a moist glimmer in Nie Mingjue's eyes.

His husband crouched down next to him, that perpetual searching gaze expectant.

Wei Wuxian swallowed against a lump, nail digging into the green shell of the seed as he peeled it off.

"Your brother noticed it first," Wei Wuxian finally said. If Nie Mingjue demanded the truth, he should be told all of it. Or at least the important parts. "There is a collection of wicked songs brought over from Dongying by the Lan centuries ago. One of the songs closely resembles Cleansing. It's said that if played with enough spiritual energy, it can kill instantly. He altered the score so that he could play it for you, one note at a time. Even if Zewu-jun was present, it would be considered nothing but a small fault in a very difficult piece."

"There's no mistake?" Wei Wuxian wished he didn't have to see the devastation his words brought. Despite all his flaws and mistakes, Nie Mingjue at his core was honest and just, giving second chances even to those who had done nothing to deserve them.

"Lan Zhan confirmed it." Wei Wuxian shook his head. "You can ask him if you wish. We compared both scores, along with the one he gave your brother. He has the one containing the final passage, which is the most potent. Because of course he'd play it with everything he had if he believed he was helping you."

"Xichen?" Nie Mingjue closed his eyes. Wei Wuxian's heart bled for him.

"I didn't tell him what we found out," he said. "And I doubt Lan Zhan did either. But he knew of my suspicions, since at first I wrote to him. I thought it would be more sensible." He scoffed at himself, but it held no mirth. "I thought he might be more open to the idea since it meant your condition could be improved. Turns out he was less open to the hope of saving you and more closed off to the possibility that you were being harmed by someone he cared about. If he knows, he figured it out himself."

"I see." His voice was a mere whisper. His throat bobbed with a swallow, but when Nie Mingjue opened his eyes his gaze was sharp. Glistening, but sharp. "Thank you for your honesty."

Nie Mingjue swayed slightly backward after that as he moved into a more comfortable position on the small steps of the artificial pond. Wei Wuxian knew their talk was far from over, but they fell silent for a little while, like a rock and the stream, two companions in their solitary existence.

"I wouldn't take it personally," Wei Wuxian said after a short while, when he was peeling the last seed, empty lotus head sitting among the tiny seeds scattered all over his lap. "I'm pretty sure he only did it to gain his wretched father's approval. Not that I'd know anything about that, but I've seen what it can turn perfectly capable men into."

He huffed at no one but himself, a dry and cheerless sound that scraped at the edges of his mind and settled beneath his skin, itching at his scars. He shook his head and, caught by a strange impulse, he took the handful of seeds from the folds of his robes.

"Here," Nie Mingjue stared at his suddenly full palms, then at Wei Wuxian who offered no explanation. "Though I have to warn you. Some of these Lanling seeds are the bitter sort. Lotus Pier grows only sweet ones. Ah, but if you bite into a bitter one and a sweet one at the same time it becomes a really good taste."

Nie Mingjue continued staring.

"If you don't want them, they're my favorite treat." Wei Wuxian almost laughed and it must have shown in his face because Nie Mingjue's features softened. He rearranged the seeds so that he held them in one hand, the other bringing them to his lips.

He bit into one experimentally. Wei Wuxian watched with lips widen into a smile as a pleasantly surprised expression spread on his face.

"They really are sweet," he said close to astonished.

"Still don't trust me, huh?" He meant it as a joke, but then Nie Mingjue looked at him so stricken for a second that Wei Wuxian regretted it instantly. He opened his mouth to apologize but the moment passed and Nie Mingjue scoffed at himself.

"It might be some time until I believe every word you say," he admitted.

"Please don't," Wei Wuxian chuckled and popped a seed into his mouth as well. "Although I rarely find utility in lying, I don't mean everything I say literally."

Nie Mingjue looked away, idly picking through the seeds.

"The point I was trying to make," he said once he had cleared his throat from whatever had been caught in there. "I know what you did for me and regret my behavior towards you all the more."

"Well, to be fair, you were way past the halfway mark to a qi deviation." Wei Wuxian said as he cracked the second head open.

"It's not really fair though, is it?" Nie Mingjue said, bringing one of his own to his lips. "I wasn't exactly cordial after. I hurt you."

The soft quirk of Wei Wuxian's lips curling around an "It wasn't that bad" was cut short by a startled choke.

"What's wrong?!" He whipped his head around to see Nie Mingjue frozen halfway through a bite, but without any obvious signs of asphyxiation. He quickly realized what had happened. "Oh. Oh! Bitter?"

Nie Mingjue made a sound Wei Wuxian once heard a dying dog make. He rummaged through his leftover seeds, mouthing at them probingly. He found what he was looking for on the first try.

"Here, this one's sweet. Hurry up, bite it." Without much ado he slid it past Nie Mingjue's lips, and waited until the uncomfortable twist around his mouth relaxed into something of almost wonder. He grinned. "See? I told you they are good together!"

"Indeed." Nie Mingjue looked at him as he chewed. "They really do complement each other."

Wei Wuxian grinned broader.

Then their eyes met and he had to look away, realizing how close they were. He let his hand sink, fingertips moist. The damp was making them as cold as the water before, but this time he didn't wipe them.

"Ah, well." He cleared his throat, trying to think back to what they were talking about, fighting the heat creeping into his cheeks. "If it makes you feel any better, your apology's accepted. Although I really didn't believe it necessary."

Silence reigned between them for a few beats, like the fretful hum of a bee, but it wasn't uncomfortable. Wei Wuxian returned to peeling the seeds, Nie Mingjue to eating them.

"You know why Jin Guangshan wanted me dead?" He asked after swallowing two.

"I’d take a wild guess and say it's because you're the only one who has the guts to publicly disapprove of his actions," Wei Wuxian said, peeling one seed and eating the next one.

“Yes.” Nie Mingjue agreed, then added, “And among those disapprovals, there is one most prominent.”

“Xue Yang.” Wei Wuxian sighed. Everyone and their whole entourage knew of the ongoing dispute.

Nie Mingjue had always been the most vocal about justice for Xue Yang's crimes against the Yueyang Chang sect. Everyone had heard the public sentence. Everyone knew Xue Yang was to be executed. And yet, he was still around. 'Mercy' they had called it. 'Life imprisonment'. It was what Jin Guangshan said, but what he meant was 'lifelong service'.

Nie Mingjue nodded. "I was furious when I found out about it, months later. After all, what righteous reason would there be to keep a scoundrel like him alive?"

He asked like he already knew the answer.

Wei Wuxian replied anyway. "I'm guessing to recreate the Stygian Tiger Seal."

"Can he?"

"No." Wei Wuxian shook his head. "He doesn't have the necessary amount of yin iron. Even if he collected a few scraps of it, he could only make maybe a small half of the seal that will never give Jin Guangshan the power he desires. Sooner or later Xue Yang will be deemed useless. The problem will solve itself. Unless…" He hesitated over the words. "Someone else finds another use for him. And has enough influence to keep him alive."

"What do you mean?" Nie Mingjue frowned, not quite following him yet.

"All I'm saying is, Jin Zixuan is missing, Jin Zixun is dying, and shijie made sure Jin Ling goes to Lotus Pier," Wei Wuxian answered, chewing on a seed, watching Nie Mingjue freeze out of the corner of his eye, as he put the pieces together. As he had already said, he wasn't stupid. He just believed too much in the best of people.

"You think…" his voice sounded oddly punched out. "His own father?"

"I don't know." Wei Wuxian shrugged, because there was no graceful way to answer that. "He was willing to kill his cousin and you, possibly attempted to kill his brother. Why would his father be any exception?"

"And Xue Yang?" Nie Mingjue inquired. "You think Xue Yang can be useful to him?"

"Maybe?" Wei Wuxian shrugged again. "He is as shrewd as he is intelligent. He might think of something."

"Which means the problem won't solve itself," Nie Mingjue frankly concluded.

"Yeah," Wei Wuxian hummed, feeling his chest tighten again with a gripping cold, his lungs filling with the smell of blood and ash. Of course Nie Mingjue wouldn't budge a single inch on this. He wanted Xue Yang dead. The Jins wanted him alive. "Which in turn means we're right back where we started."

The game, if they wanted to call it one, was far from over. The round might have ended, but the board had been reset.

"Which is why I need you." Wei Wuxian looked at him. Nie Mingjue met his gaze squarely. "You're the only one who knows… Who knows. You're the only person who can figure out what to do with the shards, before anyone else gets to them."

"You want me to use the shards?" Wei Wuxian's eyebrows shot up. Out of everyone, the last person he had expected to make that request was Nie Mingjue. "Reforge the seal?"

However, his husband only shook his head. "I want you to find a use for them that doesn't plunge the world into chaos."

Oh. Oh, of course. That was what this was all about. A new task only the resident demon could do. A way to be of service to the world, to his husband, his sect, the powers to be.
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"What is it, Nie Mingjue? You too want to lead me back to the righteous path? Drag me from the shadow to the light again? There's something you should know. I didn't want to tell you, but... If we are to be married, you should know."
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"I could look into that," Wei Wuxian mumbled, popping three seeds at once into his mouth. "It's not like I have anything better to do. Except for taking care of this pond, maybe."

At least he still could be useful.

He felt Nie Mingjue's eyes on him, but no words came.

"Did you know," his lips were moving, tongue forming the syllables before his mind could think of them. "Jin Zixuan made it as a betrothal present for shijie. Jiang Cheng showed it to me yesterday. He's been taking care of it in their absence." He huffed. "One thing I can actually help him with."

"...I misjudged you."

It came unexpectedly. Wei Wuxian thought Nie Mingjue had said his piece, but it seemed he had been wrong.

"Huh?" He asked very eloquently.

"I believed I was dying," he repeated himself, seemingly off topic. Wei Wuxian listened. "When Huaisang approached me with the idea of marriage between our sects, I thought he was looking for allies to support him after I was gone, and the sect was his to lead. I liked the idea of him having a friend by his side and he… He always spoke highly of you. Even when everyone else stood against you, he kept saying you had to have a good reason."

Wei Wuxian felt a sudden wave of fondness for his friend, and guilt for not always meeting him with the same adherence. His friendship with Nie Huaisang had always been as easy and uncomplicated as peeling lotus seeds – something he didn't need to think about for it to work. It never occurred to him that… But then again, a lot of things about Nie Huaisang didn't occur to a great amount of people, didn't they? If there was one thing he had learned about Nie Huaisang in the past few months, it would be he never asked for credit, even when deserved, perfectly happy as long as the people he cared about were too. He swore to himself to pay better attention to him from now on.

However, it wasn't Nie Huaisang talking to him right now, but the older brother he had married. His husband, his zhangfu, who was looking at him like he had never properly seen him before.

"That wasn't the plan though, was it?" Nie Mingjue continued when Wei Wuxian failed to reply. "He asked you to save me, didn't he? In turn, he promised the aid of the Nie sect, in everything you asked for. I thought I'd only keep you in a marriage you didn't want for so long, that you'd be free of me in no time, but you went in knowing full well that the goal was to keep me alive for years. Decades. You still did it."

"It seemed like a fair trade." Wei Wuxian finally found his voice. Or at least he thought it was his. It sounded foreign to his ears, words heavy on his tongue, falling gracelessly out of his mouth. "Was that why you didn't… why you kept... refusing me?"

He hated how it broke at the end.

"I thought you might want to remarry." Nie Mingjue's voice was soft in contrast, like from a distant world, the far edge of the mesa they somehow seemed to have reached. "That would have been easier if the marriage remained unconsummated." There was a pause, a single heartbeat long. "I also thought you would rather give it to Wangji than me. When you left for Cloud Recesses so shortly after our ceremony… I didn't believe I'd see you again."

It felt like a strike from Zidian.

"You thought…" Ice. Ice cold water and seeping rain. "I wouldn't! Nie Mingjue, I… Is that how you think of me?!"

He stood up, because his legs decided it was what he should do, that he should run, run through the rain, run up the winding path and into the dark. Lotus seeds scattered all around them, dozens of soft taps against stone, a few splashes as they fell into the wet cold. Nie Mingjue stood up as well, seized his elbow. He was speaking, but it took Wei Wuxian a few moments to make out the words.

"I know," repeated over and over, until he was sure Wei Wuxian heard him. "I told you I misjudged you. But I know now." Another heartbeat of silence. "You refused him."

Wei Wuxian spun on his feet to face him, appalled. "You heard that?!"

"I followed right after Huaisang scolded me. A mortifying ordeal, let me tell you." He tried to joke. It fell on deaf ears, and the awkward smile vanished like the ashes of a fire. "I didn't mean to eavesdrop. I left as soon as I realized it wasn't a good time to interrupt you, but I couldn't help overhearing some of it."

Wei Wuxian didn't know what to say to that. He wanted to disappear. He couldn't.

"I was impressed," Nie Mingjue confessed, as Wei Wuxian was still staring at him with what felt like a face drained of all blood. "I never knew what to think of you before and I didn't see a reason to try and learn who you were, beyond a once promising young man, too arrogant not to fall victim to his hubris, or a powerful ally. I never bothered braving the shadow to see if it hid more than just the deep gorge. I was wrong about that too."

"What changed your mind," Wei Wuxian asked, barely above a whisper and so cold he barely recognized himself. Nie Mingjue didn't look away.

"I’ve been watching you. For a while now." His eyes were warm, in a way that should have been comforting, but instead it made the distance between them longer, like a rift bridged by a single plank of wood. "You may think you're so well hidden, far up the rocky cliff, on the shaded side of your lonely mountain with no one to ever see you, but it's actually very easy to find you if one puts their mind to it."

"Is it?" Wei Wuxian realized he was shaking only once he was released from the firm hold.

"I'm no flower, Nie Mingjue," he spat, bitter and venomous. "I'm no delicate, misunderstood, lonely beauty you need to save, bring back to the light of the day. The reasons Jin Guangshan hates me, all that they say about me, the things they call me. Demon, heretic, traitor, ingrate, murderer, wrong. It's all true. It's who I am. Those guards at Qiongqi? I didn't have to kill them, but I did. Because they deserved it for what they did to Wen Ning. It could have been justice for how they had treated their prisoners, but I made it personal. I turned it to revenge. Wen Chao? You can call the mere act of killing him rightful retribution, but the way I killed him? That too was revenge. Between me and Xue Yang, there really isn't much of a difference."

"You're wrong." Nie Mingjue found the moment he took to draw a breath and rudely took it from him. Wei Wuxian could only listen, arms crossed at his chest and chin held up in defiance, as his husband took apart his every defense. "Xue Yang would never save the poor remnants of a sect everyone else was happy to condemn."

"They saved my brother! They sheltered us when we had nowhere to go!" Wei Wuxian yelled. "They had nothing to do with anything!"

"Exactly!" Nie Mingjue raised his voice now as well.

Wei Wuxian came up short of an answer.

Silence spread between them when the both of them simply breathed, giving each other the moment they needed. He watched every minuscule change in Nie Mingjue's expression, while Nie Mingjue kept looking at him, like he met all of him at long last.

"That's the difference." Nie Mingjue finally spoke, more quiet and subdued than moments ago. "You saw your home burn, and you're still able to recognize that. You may be no flower, but you're not a demon either. One truth doesn't make a whole person."

Nie Mingjue took hold of him once more, but this time his touch was yielding, a gentle caress. Wei Wuxian was still shaking, but instead of a tremor it was a tremble, a shiver chasing the length of his spine. The hands tucked into his elbows gripped his robes with white knuckles. Belatedly he realized he was hugging himself.

"You have a kind heart and a conscience that sees beyond duty and rules," Nie Mingjue said. "And if sometimes you let your emotions rule you, well. I don't think there's a single person that hasn't happened to. Including me, and Lan Wangji."

"Lan Zhan? Really?" Wei Wuxian chuckled in spite of himself. He shook his head, blinking away the moisture that had collected there, before finally meeting Nie Mingjue's eyes. "If he had, we wouldn't be having this conversation."

A warm thumb swiped his cheek, knuckles warm against his skin. Wei Wuxian found himself leaning into it.

"I'm not the paragon of righteousness everyone has me for either." Nie Mingjue finally continued, when Wei Wuxian chose to stay silent. "I looked away. Passing judgement is easier than facing the truth and I made myself guilty of that. Another mistake. The one who made me see was you."

Wei Wuxian had nothing to say to that either. He could only listen, meeting Nie Mingjue's gaze squarely as his husband continued his confession.

"A whole sect, once the most powerful one under the sun. And now, there's a single child surnamed Wen." It felt like having the air punched right out of him. His a-Yuan, his son, the one good thing to come out of this long, exhausting disaster. "He clings to you as if you're the only safe place he knows. Maybe you are."

Their eyes found each other.

"I can be vindictive," Nie Mingjue continued. "I've been taken by wrath. I'm not perfect, Wei Wuxian and I don't expect anyone to be. But I try to be someone I can face without shame. I think you understand that, better than anyone else."

"Are you saying I can be redeemed because I still have a conscience?" Wei Wuxian rasped.

"I'm saying that I've judged you too harshly. I think you have too." A finger lifted his chin, curled underneath it like a hook pulling him out of the murky, ice cold waters. He found his vision blurred. "I see you, Wei Wuxian. You think you can hide behind your shadows, far away from prying eyes, but I see you. You taught me that not all shadows are impenetrable and that light is often clouded. Let me give back to you."

His vision cleared enough that he was able to finally see those eyes, waning woods yet filled with warmth.

"Some flowers grow in shadow, and through rock, in places that should by all laws of nature be barren. That doesn't make them wrong. People still come find them and use them for healing." His fingers were a source of heat against Wei Wuxian's skin, one that kindled a low flame low in his belly. "Maybe you want to be seen only by the ones willing to make the effort, the climb to reach you. I'm not claiming I understand, but who am I to judge you for just being?"

"Such poetry. I told you I'm no flower." He swallowed, voice a mere whisper. He wanted it to sound harsh, but it came out soft, almost husky.

"Might as well be one," Nie Mingjue all but countered, if a counter was a caress gentle as a loving smile or a wicked quirk of lips. Wei Wuxian sputtered, heat taking his face once more at the implication, mind reeling for a witty remark and coming up short.

"Nie Mingjue!!!" Wei Wuxian could feel his heart hammering against his ribs, blood rushing through him numbing his fingers. He needed words, but he couldn't find any, blind and deaf for anything but Nie Mingjue's lips as they talked, as they smiled.

"I must admit you're easy on the eyes." The eyes that were twinkling now, playful and teasing intent making them shimmer.

Wei Wuxian squeaked, the finger under his chin preventing him from looking away and hiding his burning face in his hands, like he wanted to. "You can't just say that so bluntly!"

"Why not? It's the truth." The deep voice was light with a quivering laugh. Wei Wuxian moaned at his misfortune. He should have known. This was Nie Huaisang's older brother, he should have known.

"We're in public!"

There was a pause.

"Of course," Nie Mingjue said and Wei Wuxian almost bought the apologetic tone. Almost. "I apologize. I forgot that there was once a time I too believed an empty courtyard counted as public."

"Shut up!" Wei Wuxian gave his husband a scathing look, but the man just smiled beneath his mustache.

"Wei Wuxian," his amusement sounded almost fond and once again Wei Wuxian felt his heart turn over. "Why do people call you shameless?"

"Honestly? At this point, I'm asking myself the same thing." Wei Wuxian glanced away in thought, before offering. "Because I always speak my mind?"

"That at least is true." Nie Mingjue chuckled. Their eyes met again and Wei Wuxian felt a strange flutter in his chest, the beat picking up into a high rhythm. Nie Mingjue looked at him, still smiling, but his eyes wholly sincere. "The strength of your heart is beauty in its own right."

Wei Wuxian hadn't thought his face could get any hotter, and yet! He could only look at Nie Mingjue, jaw tight, eyes wide, in awe, with hope.

"What… What are you… What do you mean?" He hardly recognized his own voice, far away and foreign over the drumming in his ears, that effervescent marching tune.

"We're bound together now. I want to make this work," Nie Mingjue answered. "I owe you as much."

The thumb against his chin tightened, strong fingers with the warmest touch spreading out to engulf his whole jaw. His head spun like there was barely air around them, high, so high up above the clouds...

"You once asked me for a little happiness." The only sound in his ears was Nie Mingjue's voice. "If the offer still stands, I'm ready to make that climb."

The peak of the mountain.

"On one condition," Wei Wuxian whispered. "You'll stop refusing me."

He didn't know who moved first.

Ultimately, he didn't think it mattered.

Nie Mingjue's lips were soft, softer than they looked, softer than he imagined, firmer and surer than anything he ever experienced. A low, needy sound escaped him as he tasted the wet tongue against his, senses flooded with an overwhelming feeling he didn't know but needed more of. He couldn't figure how to respond, except that he wanted to match that dizzying heat, that vertigo. He was vaguely aware of the noises he was making, high pitched, startled and delighted at the same time, far too embarrassing but out of his control.

It was over far too soon, far too chaste, not enough.

He watched his husband lick the traces of saliva off his lips, his own heart an orchestra of drums.

"Don't tell me," Nie Mingjue frowned, why was he frowning? "You've never even kissed before?"

Wei Wuxian made a sound at the back of his throat, abashed and sputtering as he all but crashed back down to earth.

"Twice!" He cried out, not entirely sure whether he was defending his virtue or the lack of his experience. "I’ve kissed twice!"

"Hmm…" Nie Mingjue hummed, before smirking impishly. "Must not have been very good then."

Wei Wuxian thought he might die.

"Let me show you," Nie Migjue said and before Wei Wuxian could combust for real, he leaned down and claimed his lips once more.

Eons later they parted, this time both of them breathless and red-faced, although for a reason very different from embarrassment.

Their bodies were flushed together, and even in the dead cold of approaching winter, Wei Wuxian felt warm.

"I have to ask, but you don't have to answer right away." Wei Wuxian loved how out of breath Nie Mingjue was. "Is this something you want because you want me, or out of duty?"

The wonderful warmth tingling low in his belly ceded to something more tense and gripping when Wei Wuxian all at once realized what Nie Mingjue was asking about. He didn't answer immediately, considering.

"At the very least," he finally said looking into those dark, warm eyes. "It's something I don't want not to happen."

Nie Mingjue contemplated this for a moment, before nodding.

"We'll take it slow," he finally said, serious but his soft expression turning into a smile. "We have time. Thanks to you, we have time."

Wei Wuxian smiled right back,so broad that it pulled at the corners of his eyes, the one that was bright with his teeth.

They only let go of each other when Nie Huaisang came looking for them on behalf of the still quarreling sect leaders. They went side by side.

Chapter Text

The first time Nie Mingjue had laid eyes on him, it was a warm late summer day in Qinghe.

The gates of the Unclean Realm had risen for his then best adviser and treasured friend, only to reveal his wayward little brother, a grin splitting his face in two. Easy laughter played on his lips as he walked alongside the two youths he had kept gushing about in his many letters home. They both saluted him as he came to welcome their guests, their cheeks rosy with excitement and adventure. When their hands lowered and heads lifted, their eyes met for the first time, and he thought he understood why his little brother had found no other topic in his letters. Two dark doe eyes revealed a zealous heart, promising great deeds and courage beyond such a young age. Eyes full of mischief and a smile made of sunshine and mirth, a sharp mind, a kind and just soul, courteousness, consideration, and a pretty face to match all made for good company. He remembered talent and an inquisitive spirit. He made a compliment, back then not much more than a simple pleasantry, albeit one of honest appreciation.

He remembered proud smiles.

The second time they saw each other was maybe a year - or a lifetime - later in Lanling. Jinlintai had been heavy with the scent of late summer, the Sun glowing warm and high in the sky, unaware of everything that had transpired since the seasons had cycled. They had met before, of course, during strategic meetings and in the heat of battle, but they were no more than glimpses, moments that spoke nothing and revealed so little, yet managed to completely muddy the amenity of that first meeting.

The war had cost them a great number of things.

No one left it unscathed, all of them chewed up by the monster made of bloodlust and wrath, spat out in a shape too different and jaded to ever be the same.

He remembered swirling darkness, rage and pain, all etched deep into a troubled face. He remembered corpses, raised undead and robbed of their sacred rest. None of that soft heart remained. He remembered his horror and disgust that later turned to disappointment and regret.

It had been their third meeting that held the charm, as they say.

It was close to shameful that it was incidentally also the first time he had visited Lotus Pier officially as a sect leader.

When he had been a boy his father had once taken him and toddler Huaisang, although his brother wasn't likely to remember that. It hadn't changed much on the outside, he remembered thinking as he had stepped from his horse onto the lush, fertile ground, accompanied by a handful of his closest shidi.

The entryway had been the same, with a doorframe of redwood and bronze, and he had been so sure as soon as he would set foot on the floating sandstone ground, or the softly creaking planks above the murky surface, the sea sickness would return as well. Lotus Pier was beautiful. Truly, it was. Also a curse to a Northerner such as him, and thus one reason why he had neglected to visit for so long. The easiest access was by water, dense woods and a maze of hills guarding the entry by land long before the gates came to view. In the past this had been deemed a sufficient defense, the Jiang sect taking pride in their hospitality and booming trade, welcoming all who wanted to be welcomed.

Nowadays the dense woods were aided by heavy wards, ones that put the invisible shields of Gusu and the Killing Fortress of Qinghe to shame.

Some of the finish had been fresh, a stray plank here and there lighter than the rest, and as he had passed the gates, Nie Mingjue couldn't help but notice the hinges, shiny and new behind the aged handles.

Lotus Pier had looked the same as always. It wasn't.

Jiang Wanyin – Sect Leader Jiang by then, a man too old to be called a child, and too young to be a leader – had greeted him from the Lotus Throne, posture straight, head held high, tight bun on the crown of his head held together by a silver lotus, robes of deep purple concealing most of a seat too large. He wore it well, Nie Mingjue remembered thinking. Better at least than he himself had, back when his own body had been still too light for a seat made of heavy, black marble. Next to Jiang-zongzhu, he had been standing tall and upright, dressed in full sect regalia, a smile so polite it was almost demure…
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"Welcome to Lotus Pier, Nie-zongzhu!" Jiang Wanyin - Sect Leader Jiang now, Nie Mingjue had to remind himself - greeted him amicably. There was a broad smile on his face that looked like it had been practiced in front of the mirror the entire last night. The dark bags under his eyes could be called to testify. "Finally we meet under pleasant circumstances!"

Nie Mingjue couldn't stop his eyes from darting to his right side, even as he grunted an absent minded greeting.

Wei Wuxian stood there smiling empty and polite, his dark eyes trained on the ground, his back bent in an appropriate bow, not too deep and not too shallow. It was the perfect angle and lasted the right amount of time. When he straightened, his eyes hadn't moved. It occured to Nie Mingjue that perhaps he hid bags darker than his brother's, shadows behind shadows on his ashen face. Even from a distance he couldn't help noticing the sunken cheeks and the pallor of his skin, only underlined by his attire. He wore robes of a deep charcoal gray, held together by a sash the color of heather in autumn, the same color as his cape. A clarity bell hung on the right side, silver like the lotus that crowned his head, smaller and subtler than the one his brother wore, but as clear as daylight.

He took the seat offered to him, his company right behind him.

"Jiang-zongzhu," he said after the initial pleasantries were over. "You will have to excuse me for being frank."

He could have cut the tension in the room with Baxia and risk blunting the blade as he uttered those words. Later he would swear the sound of an inhale had been an audible and sharp sound in the room.

"I'm not as silver tongued as my brother or yours." He admitted. "I accept the offer of marriage."

If the inhale had been audible, the exhale echoed.

"And I would be privileged to call you family." The only other person who had the will to stand against Jin Guangshan. They only lacked the power and the resources. Mingjue had those in spades. He was willing to trade them for a voice on his side of the room.

The tension between them didn't fade, even as Jiang Wanyin blabbered a few joyous words, all empty of the sentiment.

Throughout the whole exchange, Wei Wuxian said nothing.

He only made a single sound.

Jiang-zongzhu hunched forward, trying to make himself even smaller in a seat still too large for him, a string of unfinished sentences falling from his lips, unsure of how to act in this completely alien situation. It was such an eerily familiar image that Nie Mingjue could feel the coldness of the marble through his robes like he was still eighteen. It was then that the sound of a quiet cough could be heard through the hall.

Wei Wuxian had merely cleared his throat, unassuming and unaccompanied by any gesture but the change had been immediate. It was fascinating to watch how Jiang Wanyin straightened again, posture suddenly perfect, a casual if not slightly embarrassed smile on his face.

"Ah, I apologize," he said almost sheepishly after collecting himself for a second or two. "I'm afraid diplomacy isn't one of my strengths."

What had been an unsure boy in the seat of a man became a sect leader in the time it took to draw a breath.

"Perhaps," Wei Wuxian spoke for the first time, his voice quiet and reserved. "We should talk about a subject we're all well versed in. Jiang Cheng, why don't you share with Nie-zongzhu what you have been working on in honor of our new alliance?"

Jiang Wanyin's eyes lit up with a fire Nie Mingjue hadn't seen burn in him since before the war.

"Nie-zongzhu." His voice rang out with sharp focus. "As you know, Yunmeng is known for its superior silk and dyes. Since the proposed union between our families I have been pondering whether there was a way to make fine silk warm like fleece…"

He continued talking, voice clear, no trace of the unsure boy remaining. With a sudden strike of profound clarity Nie Mingjue realized he was watching the bud of what might have been a formidable rule, had it been granted more time to bloom. His eyes landed involuntarily on Wei Wuxian and what he saw stole his breath away. The dark eyes had finally lifted their gaze from the ground to gaze at their leader, accompanied by the proudest of all smiles. Pride only a brother could feel. Nie Mingjue felt it in his chest like it was his own.

He wondered if this was what Jin Guangshan had seen. If this was what kept him awake at night, the understanding of what the unwavering loyalty of a sharp mind, boundless talent and an indiscernible power meant if it stood against his sect. Nie Mingjue knew what it meant if it stood with his.

"I don't count diplomacy as one of my strengths either." He allowed himself sympathy and was gracious to ignore the way Jiang Wanyin's shoulders relaxed with relief. "However, I have the luxury of manpower that you do not. If you want to survive, you will have to learn fast."

He watched the tension return to the slender shoulders, but this time it was accompanied by something firm and determined.

Nie Mingjue felt eyes on himself and when he shifted his gaze he was met by eyes as dark as resin.

He held his breath.

Then the polite, empty smile settled back on Wei Wuxian's lips - full and plush, Nie Mingjue couldn't help but notice. His gaze dropped again, shadows shrouding his face once more.
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They spent the rest of that welcome talking about trade.

After they finished the tea the handful of men that had accompanied him brought in his courting gifts and a few more words were exchanged about the advantages of the union between their sects, which devolved into talk about more trade. They discussed which goods would be of most interest and benefit, which would have to be further developed, the advance in technology and the innovation their exchange would bring forth. It had startled him perhaps more than it should have to realize it had been yet again Wei Wuxian to steer their conversation that way.

After a light meal and a little more polite conversation they had been left alone.

Or as alone as one could feel being tailed by an undead chaperon.
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"He volunteered," Wei Wuxian informed him halfway up the hill. "I told everyone they were being silly, but Jiang Cheng insisted we do this the proper way. And since everyone is busy because we're still quite, uhm, understaffed…"

"I understand that," Nie Mingjue said, brushing the tall grass out of his way and biting back a curse. If he had to thread through this kind of foliage daily in Qinghe, his qi would have deviated ages ago. "I just don't enjoy having fierce corpses following me."

"Wen Ning is different," Wei Wuxian assured him, completely unbothered by the weed. "He retains his mind and he's sentient."

"Then how does he feel about having the right to die taken from him?" The words left him before he had a chance to consider them. He regretted them immediately. This wasn't how you spoke to someone you intended to marry. Although the agreement had been made, alienating one’s future spouse was a bad idea in every imaginable situation.

"I didn't take his right to die," Wei Wuxian nearly whispered, his light smile from earlier all but completely wiped from his features, his previously relaxed figure suddenly tense. There was a sick sense of satisfaction clawing at Nie Mingjue's innards for that. "I merely didn't let him die because someone else decided his life wasn't worth living. He's free to live now as he wishes, as long as he wishes to. Isn't that the very immortality that every cultivator strives for?"

"You dare compare those two?!" Nie Mingjue shot back, outrage and disbelief stirring his temper into a storm.

Wei Wuxian said nothing.

Nie Mingjue bit his tongue. As revolting as Wei Wuxian's ideas were, surely it wouldn't bide him well to express his indignation so openly to someone he intended to wed. Not that it mattered much, considering the probable duration of their marriage, and yet... An awkward silence settled between them. Wei Wuxian's fingers curled tighter around the edges of the jewelry box that Nie Mingjue had presented earlier, a gift deeply intimate and thus demanding an intimate setting. Both the box and the contents itself – a hairpin, a brush, and an embellished leather hair cuff – were of the finest Qinghe craftsmanship, with the engraving detailed, and appliques as fine as filigree, although simple and unassuming unless regarded up close.

Wei Wuxian had regarded it very closely for several moments, as his fingers had traced the delicate flowers on the pin and the fine etchings of the comb, eyes never leaving the shiny brass relief of the band, glittering with very few small gems, easily overlooked but each of them precious beyond measure. Nie Mingjue had never felt as insecure as that moment. He had been told that Wei Wuxian preferred simpler adornments over elaborate ones, but making them too plain could be easily deemed an insult. In the end Nie Mingjue concluded that uncomplicated but rich in details and finely crafted would denote the right amount of respect.

"A thoughtful gift," Wei Wuxian had finally called it with that easy, perfectly polite smile. There had been a light to his eyes that made it seem honest. He hadn't let go of it since.

Nie Mingjue opened his mouth.

"I'm sorry." Wei Wuxian beat him to it, shoulders slumping with a silent sigh. "I'm not very good at this. Showing myself in the most enchanting light."

"Neither am I," Nie Mingjue admitted and their looks met briefly. After a moment he added. "The agreement has been made. I'm not backing down on it. Rest assured."

The tiny, lopsided smile that appeared for the shortest moment on Wei Wuxian's face felt strangely like the worst kind of victory – or defeat, depending.

"Of course not."

Nie Mingjue saw the bob of his throat as he swallowed. A sick feeling spread in his guts and he averted his gaze, only to be hit into his face with a stable of that awful tall grass they had been threading. He got busy fending it off for a few moments before he realized they had stopped. When he looked around he came to the conclusion this was the top of the low hill they've been climbing and they were standing on the edge of it. The view was more grass.

"What is this place?" He asked with a scoff unable to keep at least a little of his judgment leaking.

"We practice archery here," Wei Wuxian answered, without looking at him, still clutching the box. "I thought you might enjoy the solid ground better than a walk on the piers."
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Things had grown awkward after that.

It was true that Yunmeng didn't have the same scenic views as the rangier Qinghe, but that didn't make it any less worthy of appreciation. The river banks and lake shores were quaint with reeds and flowers, and alive, with both human and animal life. The towns were picturesque and the people were hospitable. There was always an inn open nearby or a family with doors ajar for weary travelers. All of Yunmeng was a vast open space. It was easy to make it your own.

On the second day of his visit, Wei Wuxian took him to the Wen settlement.

It had been a bold move of Jiang Wanyin to resettle them before Nie Mingjue had given his official word. A part of him felt flattered that they considered his primary assent promise enough, while the other part of him frowned on the hubris of the presumed certainty of their success. Only once he stood frozen, rooted to one spot in the little refugee settlement at the outskirts of Lotus Pier had he understood.

It had all been a lie.

Elderly. Poor. Sickly. Humble. This was not what they had been told. None of those words had been uttered by Jin Guangshan, or Jin Guangyao, or anyone else for that matter. Then again, no one had bothered to ascertain their words either.

He remembered asking himself when he had allowed complacency to preside over matters of justice.

There had been a child.

A boy, who had rushed to Wei Wuxian's side in a blur of color and clung to his legs like they were the well of life, crying all the while like Wei Wuxian was about to walk onto the gallows instead of his wedding.

With cold dread Nie Mingjue realized that there were no other children in the settlement. The only Wen settlement that there was left.

The boy – Wen Yuan, Nie Mingjue had to remind himself – had run off soon after that, with tears in his eyes and wailing from the top of his lungs after taking a single look at 'Xian-gege's' intended, as Wei Wuxian had introduced him. They hadn't traveled even halfway back to Lotus Pier before he suggested Wei Wuxian bring him along as his ward. As the future Sect Husband of Qinghe, he was entitled an entourage. He was free to choose its members.

He tried to ignore the surprised expression, perhaps in reaction to the fact that Nie Mingjue of all people would allow any Wen under his roof.

Nie Mingjue thought it was stranger that Lotus Pier should welcome them so openly instead.

Wei Wuxian didn’t offer a reply and swapped the topic to possible dates for the ceremony instead. In the end it was decided that the summer a year after Jiang Yanli was to marry would be appropriate, and Nie Mingjue promised to consult an astrologer upon his return to Qinghe.

They announced their engagement the following month.

A week later he endured a visit from his sworn brothers, both of whom tried to dissuade him from the endeavor, each for their own reasons and with varying degrees of subtlety. He didn't give much weight to Jin Guangyao's arguments about the possible blow to his reputation that associating with such a controversial character would bring. He would only be around for a short while afterwards. With the date set a year and a half in the future, he would be lucky to last that long. Xichen's quiet concern and the confession of fear for his little brother's heart that he shared later, in a more private setting, were much harder to ignore. But Mingjue had his own little brother to worry about, who would soon be running a sect he was never taught to run. Wei Wuxian at least would know how to handle both the sect and the grief.

When the herbal mixtures and tonics of unmistakable Wen formula, clearly intended to stabilize his qi, started to arrive on a monthly basis he thought it a misguided and ultimately shallow effort, nothing but performance. He almost sent them back as broken bottles. It was Huaisang who managed to convince him to take them.

The infuriating thing was, they really did stabilize his qi, to the point that surviving to his wedding day became a realistic prospect again.

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"I am glad to see you in good health," Wei Wuxian said to him almost a year later, as they strolled through the muddy winter of Lanling. "I admit, I was concerned for your well being these past months. Nie-xiong expresses worry quite vividly in his letters."

His tone was perfectly courteous and appropriately cordial, and Nie Mingjue, who had watched him hold his infant nephew with reverent wonder in his eyes, and gift him a unique and powerful bracelet of his own design, was not in the mood for conventional pleasantries.

"Don't worry. I'm not dead yet." He scoffed. "But half a year more and your desired alliance will be secure."

He convinced himself that the expression that flashed over Wei Wuxian's face was offense.

"The alliance is truly imperative, isn't it?" He asked conversationally, but there was a sharp edge to it that made Nie Mingjue avert his gaze. "I would still hope to enjoy my husband for longer than the honeymoon lasts."

"I'm sure I'm not the only option available for you." He rebuked, thinking of the secrets Xichen had shared, that he probably shouldn't be privy to but now were difficult to ignore. "Widowers have their own unique charm, or so I hear."

"I would much rather be a husband." Wei Wuxian didn't let himself be disheartened and Nie Mingjue felt something in his chest twist and break.

"I'm sure it won't be a long wait." It came out as a snarl. "From what I hear, Wangji will be more than happy to divest you of your loneliness."

"Same way Zewu-jun is happy to divest you of yours?" It came out of nowhere and landed abruptly, like a club to Nie Mingjue's head.

"I apologize…" Wei Wuxian started immediately, appearing shocked by his own words, but it was too late. Nie Mingjue felt his insides boil over like they did so often nowadays.

"Xichen only wishes to help me!" He spun on his heel, facing Wei Wuxian squarely as he snarled. Their faces were inches apart and he could see the shock in the slate gray eyes. It was true that his sworn brothers had spent more time in Qinghe after learning of his engagement but he would not let slander taint their objectives, especially not Xichen's. "I won't let you speak ill of him."

"That wasn't my intention." Wei Wuxian looked away, but let a tiny, wistful smile slip on his face. "It appears we both have people who care for us deeply, don't we?"

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Maybe a little happiness wasn't so much to ask for. Maybe it was a lot. Maybe it depended on how you defined it.

Whichever it was, it hadn't mattered then.

He supposed many would define a wedding as the epitome of happiness, although Nie Mingjue couldn't empathize. A part of him wished he could, but the greater, more rational part argued it was perhaps better if he didn't. What sense was there in kindling feelings that would have no time to mature? Plant hope where it had no chance of sprouting into chance, much less grow into possibility?

What mattered was that his brother would have an ally and a tyrant would have someone strong enough to stand against them. What mattered was that justice would have a way to prevail.

To his credit, Wei Wuxian held his own end of the bargain.

When he arrived at the Unclean Realm three days before the ceremony, accompanied by his freshly adopted son, his undead chaperone and a dowry that would have never let you guess his recent destitution, in his own two hands he carried a small box, just big enough for a single amulet. Or the shards of a seal. It had been Nie Mingjue's sole condition that the Stygian Tiger Seal would be destroyed. He hadn't expected Wei Wuxian to agree to it so easily.

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"I always meant to destroy it," Wei Wuxian explained when Nie Mingjue visited him in his spousal chambers that evening, before the purification rituals needed to commence. "I only kept it as a deterrent, to protect the Wens. They're safe now, thus it no longer holds a purpose."

If Nie Mingjue was to be honest, it surprised him. As far as he was aware the seal had plenty of purpose beyond a warning sign to scare aggressors off, most notably the control of fierce corpses. It was the one reason why it was so coveted. He didn't quite know what to think. If power truly wasn't what Wei Wuxian desired after all, it didn't explain why he refused to give up yin cultivation. Nie Mingjue hadn't seen his sword among his possessions.

"Yet you insist on the demonic path." He noted and watched the politely pleasant expression twist into something oddly forlorn. A battle unfolded behind those sad doe eyes but it was over too quickly for Nie Mingjue to discern either the stakes or the parties. When Wei Wuxian's attention settled on him again, he looked defeated.

"I'm afraid the sword is wasted on me, Nie-zongzhu," he said, tilting his lips into an arrogant quirk, but instinctively Nie Mingjue sensed the facade. "I can't walk that path anymore."

"Can't or won't?" He countered, offended by both the quick dismissal and the obvious lie. "The Unclean Realm is strong in yang and everyone within its walls trains hard and expects everyone else to do the same. Are those efforts wasted as well? Do you truly believe we have nothing to teach you?"
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The answer to that question was a horror of its own.

Nie Mingjue's head had never stopped spinning in its aftermath. He felt caught in a spiral, whirling round and round in an uncontrollable current unable to hold onto anything, not even a stable of grass within his reach. If he was honest he had been feeling like this for a long time now, although he couldn't quite pinpoint when it started. With his engagement? During the Sunshot campaign? Or all the way back when he became Sect Leader Nie?

If he was honest, his life had been out of control for a long time now. Wei Wuxian was just the latest cataclysm added to the tempest.

Nie Mingjue was also nothing if not a man of his word, so three days later he had knelt next to his young groom and bowed three times, sealing their union. The banquet was grand and the guests were many, although not all of them donned a cheerful face. He knew Xichen had come out of loyalty to him. He assumed Wangji attended out of his own devotion for Wei Wuxian. Nie Mingjue had drunk deeply and soothed himself with the knowledge it wouldn't last long. His qi had been stabilized but his condition continued to deteriorate, albeit at a slower pace. He was still at the crumbling edge of a deep gorge, surrounded by wasteland. No matter how fast he ran and how slow the edge crumbled, his doom was apparent. Wei Wuxian would soon be free again, while Yunmeng and Qinghe would still have their alliance.

He didn't stay long, opting to leave the banquet early rather than late.

Wei Wuxian was waiting for him at his new residence, opposite Nie Mingjue's own, in all ways its exact mirror. Sect leader and spouse both in perfect balance.

Neither Qinghe nor Yunmeng custom demanded that Wei Wuxian wear a veil so Nie Mingjue was able to catch a glimpse of his pensive expression as he stepped in. He immediately twisted it into an easy smile, like he thought he could fool Nie Mingjue that he felt a speck of happiness.

They ate.

After three days of fasting it tasted like something out of heaven and Nie Mingjue didn't notice until halfway through that Wei Wuxian was barely eating at all. Judging by the stories Nie Mingjue had heard, Wei Wuxian had once been known for his voracious appetite, but now he barely swallowed half a plate worth of delicacies. Nie Mingjue assumed the lack of appetite stemmed from nerves and vowed to not drag the whole disaster out for too long anymore.

They drank the liquor served to them, arms hooked into each other.

When he left a short while later he managed to convince himself that it wasn't hurt reflecting on his young husband's face and when weeks later the selfsame left for Gusu in a haste, he told himself everything was alright until he believed it.
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"I'm sorry, Wei-xiong." His little brother's voice was rarely earnest and it made Nie Mingjue stop just outside the door. He hadn't considered that Wei Wuxian would be visiting his little brother at such an early hour.

"I never intended you to be unhappy." Huaisang continued, and Nie Mingjue could feel the regret that saturated his little brother's voice like it was his own. "I would never have approached you if I had known… I honestly thought the two of you could…"

"Aiya, Nie-xiong," Wei Wuxian interrupted him, voice soft and upbeat, and Nie Mingjue could see the small smile that curled on those plush lips that had no chance of reaching his eyes. He smiled a lot like that. Especially lately. "Does any of it even matter? We've both got what we wanted, after all. It rarely happens that an operation is this successful. It would be strange if all of it was perfect."

For a few moments there was only the haunted sound of a dizi that wasn't Huaisang's, and Nie Mingjue abruptly realized that Wei Wuxian was learning the score.

"Do you believe me, Wei-xiong?" His brother asked seemingly out of nowhere, but Nie Mingjue knew it must have been a heavy weight on his small shoulders. "When I say that I want you to be happy?"

The tune stopped. For a while there was no sound at all.

"I'm sure I have no idea what you're talking about, Nie-xiong," Wei Wuxian answered so quietly that Nie Mingjue had to strain to hear him. "I'm just fine. Everything's just fine."
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A mere few days after Nie Mingjue overheard that conversation, Wei Wuxian played for him for the first time.

It was so different from Huaisang's bamboo flute, Chenqing alive and whispering with every breath Wei Wuxian blew, its spirit permeating every note. It sounded deeper and trilled higher at the same time, carrying the Otherworld within the bones it had been etched from. It held a terrible power, and yet healing was all of its intent.

"It's not the source of the energy, it's what we do with it," Wei Wuxian had told him one evening.

Nie Mingjue hadn't agreed with him, and he still didn't. If the acquisition of said energy source itself was wicked it had to be weighed as well, but he finally conceded that the outgoing effect was a matter separate from inherent nature of the power or the person who wielded it. Wei Wuxian was also a talented flautist, the melody clean and enchanting as he played it, completely faultless with no note out of place. Even Xichen would have commended him for it had he been present.

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As 'Cleansing' resounded through the halls of the Unclean Realm with the weight of eternity, Nie Mingjue felt his spirit settle, calm and balanced where anxiety and enmity were prone to take over. The last time its melody had been this effective was when Xichen had played it for him personally. Even when Jin Guangyao played it had never had such a profound effect, a hint of wrath always remaining deep within his core.

The last note rang out through the air and Nie Mingjue opened his eyes.

Simultaneously, Wei Wuxian lowered his flute and their looks met.

It hadn't been long since Wei Wuxian offered to play for him – an offer that would have surprised Nie Mingjue, had he not overheard Wei Wuxian learning its score. His husband had never expressed interest in playing for him before. Not that he had much of a reason to want to help in the first place, likely counting the days till he could finally donn the mourning whites. Yet Nie Mingjue, befuddled by the offer no matter how much he wondered about it, had acquiesced.

Wei Wuxian's smile had been radiant, like Nie Mingjue's acceptance meant the world to him. He was radiant now too, brilliant with the accomplishment of having played the difficult piece perfectly. Nie Mingjue knew he should compliment him, but for some reason couldn't bring himself to do it.

"How do you feel, husband?" Wei Wuxian asked him, shuffling closer, not a single trace of deceit or mockery in his open face.

This was another thing Nie Mingue wasn't sure what to think about. After their first few awkward weeks, Wei Wuxian had taken to calling him 'husband', simple and true a title as it could be. It was a perfectly appropriate address to use, yet it made Nie Mingjue feel things he had never expected to feel. But then again he had never expected the infamous Yiling Patriarch to have a smile this pure.

It threw him off. Reminded him of things he had believed had died on the docks of Lotus Pier, or burned in the fire of the Qishan volcano. Yet Lotus Pier had been reborn and the flames of Qishan burned out. Maybe not all was as lost as Nie Mingjue had believed it to be.

"Good," he grunted to distract himself from the confused swirl in his belly. "Settled."

Wei Wuxian laughed like a ray of sunlight and Nie Mingjue's insides rearranged themselves.

"You play well, considering what a difficult score it is." He felt petty saying it, aiming to be demeaning and regretting it immediately. However, as the words passed his lips they came out as a compliment.

Wei Wuxian was positively glowing.

"I learned from the best!" He exclaimed with pride, when suddenly his posture turned more tame. "Ah, I mean, Lan-er-gongzi is an excellent teacher. I have been very lucky to learn from him."

Of course. Nie Mingjue felt an irrational bout of anger rise to his chest.

"Lan Zhan, I mean Lan-er-gongzi," Wei Wuxian stuttered out. "Suggested that he could compose a melody tailored specifically to your spiritual energy. It would be very effective."

"Is Cleansing not good enough for Wangji's tastes?" He spat out harsher than intended, the fire within him rising in temperature. However, even through the burn he regretted it an instant later when Wei Wuxian's grip on his flute turned white.

It was all Nie Mingjue could do to not curse himself. Here his young husband was, doing his level best to save him, while all he offered in turn were snide remarks and temper tantrums. It would be easier if he was just allowed to die. Why didn't they let him die? Why insist on healing him? Why?!

"That's not how he meant it!" Wei Wuxian defended, but the hint of anxiety in his voice was clear as day. "Lan Zhan meant no ill. Cleansing is a great foundation of musical cultivation intended for spiritual healing, but its effectiveness can be compounded by applying personalized scores."

Nie Mingjue wanted to bang his head against the dark marble of his table until it split open. There was one reason he could think of that wholly explained why everyone wanted to save him. And if he was going to live, it was a fact he needed to face. Anything else would be to dishonor all of those who had pulled him from the edge of the gorge.

"In all honesty," Wei Ying continued, voice suddenly subdued and sincere. "Lan Zhan is really upset that he never got us a proper wedding present. He wants to make up for it."

As far as Nie MIngjue remembered, Wangji had presented them with a perfectly appropriate gift, a delicately painted paravan and the softest fleece that the mountains surrounding Gusu had to offer.

Wangji. Quiet Wangji who always behaved painfully properly, but secretly enjoyed riding his shoulders when he was no older than five, tailing his brother's shadow whenever the Nie sect visited the Cloud Recesses. Dark vines of regret curled around Nie Mingjue's core.

No. This wouldn't do. He had to do better than this.

"Play again."

Wei Wuxian gave him a surprised look, doe eyes staring wide at him.

"Play again," Nie Mingjue repeated and internally winced at himself at how much like an order it sounded. Much softer, he added, "Please."

If it took a thousand, a billion melodies of 'Cleansing' he would do better.

Wei Wuxian nodded and lifted the flute to his lips. There was something hesitant about his gesture, a slight tremble in his fingers. Nie Mingjue centered himself as well as he could and said, "I will think about Wangji's offer."

He watched as Wei Wuxian's face brightened again with that smile that shone like the sun and turned his eyes into twin moons that reflected its light.

Better, Nie Mingjue thought to himself as he leaned back into the melody.
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Weeks passed, seasons changed.

They went to Lanling.

They returned.

The first snow fell and then it melted with the thaw. Nie Mingjue felt alive and stronger than ever, his mind as clear as never before in those brisk days of early spring, as the light brought the first flowers to bloom through the last bites of frost. With the thaw the remains of the darkness washed away, revealing the secrets it hid in its wake.

So that was where they were now.

The flower and the rock, two solitary companions at the peak of the mountain. Forced together by circumstance, allies by necessity, lovers by choice.

"Run, Nie-xiong!" The now familiar high pitch brought him back from the quiet contemplation he had fallen into as he walked the road to their residence. The paved courtyard separated the two wings, the northern one dark and cold and the southern warm and light, perfect mirrors of each other, perfectly in balance. The two gates faced each other, both of them wide open. One was quiet, as it usually was during the day when he attended his duties as a sect leader. From the other one a loud noise could be heard, then smoke swirled out through the wooden arch of the entry.

Nie Mingjue hastened his step.

"That wasn't supposed to happen." He heard him before he saw him, a dark figure in the harsh light of the morning, scratching his head as next to him Huaisang hid his face behind his fan to avoid the smoke.

"Aiya, Wei-xiong. Maybe it can't be done at all." His little brother waved his fan to chase away the pungent smell.

"Of course it can!" Wei Wuxian exclaimed, still in his warmest winter clothes, deep teal, onyx and heather in honor of both sects while being his unmistakable, distinct self. His twin braids were bound with care, the top of his head adorned with the pin and the cuff Nie Mingjue had gifted him, a whole life ago in Lotus Pier. "Besides, I promised my husband I could do it! I can't just not do it now!"

"Is everything alright?" Nie Mingjue asked with concern, finally making his presence known.

"Da-ge!" Huaisang gave him a bright grin as he spotted him, but Nie Mingjue's gaze settled on that soft, sheepish smile curling at Wei Wuxian's lips.

"Husband," he greeted him as they came closer, scratching his nose. "To what do I owe this visit?"

Both of their faces were covered in soot, but other than that they looked unhurt. Nie Mingjue still felt compelled to repeat his question. With these two together, safe was better than sorry.

"Are you both alright? I heard an explosion." He looked between the two of them. Huaisang hid his sheepish smile behind his fan, while Wei Wuxian chuckled suspiciously.

"Just a minor setback," he answered and promptly changed the topic. Nie Mingjue decided to pry later. "Was there something you wanted?"

He remembered then why he came to his husband's quarters in the middle of the day and reached into the folds of his robes.

"I wanted to show you this." He pulled out the thick vine-like stem, dotted with delicate white flowers like snowflakes against the midnight sky. "We found it today at the back of the fortress. An entire colony sprouted on the mountain side."

He watched Wei Wuxian's eyes widen with surprise, his hands gently cupping the flower offered to him.

"Is this…" He didn't get to finish as Huaisang snatched it from him.

"Oh, is this Resent?!" He twirled the delicate flower as he twirled his brushes, inspecting it from every angle like a piece at an exhibition. "First time I’ve seen one in the flesh."

Nie Mingjue caught Wei Wuxian's quiet sigh that hid an exasperated, but over all fond smile and took the flower from Huaisang's hand, giving it back to him.

"It seems it was time for it to return to the Unclean Realm," he said and tried not to smile too obviously at Wei Wuxian's bemused look and Huaisang's pout.

"It's rather plain," Huaisang said, his cheeks just a little puffed. "I imagined it prettier."

Nie Mingjue relished in Wei Wuxian's impish grin.

"Its roots shatter rock as it grows. It's allowed to look any way it wants." His eyes met Nie Mingjue's with a mischievous twinkle. "Its strength is beauty in its own right."

Nie Mingjue's heart thrummed with the beat of a hundred drums.

"Aiya…" Huaisang sighed, sounding oddly defeated, but not dejected. "It's truly that time, isn't it?"

Wei Wuxian raised an eyebrow at him.

"According to the legend," Huaisang answered with a smile. "It only grows within the walls of the Unclean Realm if an exceptional person inhabits it. The last time it bloomed was when our grandmother was born."

"She was the sect leader prior to our father," Nie Mingjue explained without prompting, and hid a smirk in his mustache when amused curiosity curled the plush lips of his husband upward. Wei Wuxian smiled that secret, quiet smile of his, still holding the small vine like a precious gift.

"Yes. A-Yuan and Wen Ning really are exceptional." Wei Wuxian nodded and Nie Mingjue had to put in a lot more effort into hiding his smile. "I will go find some water for it. Then I suppose I should take care of that mess before meeting with Ma-hufa."

He said all of that with a twinkle in his eyes while looking directly at Nie Mingjue, and he felt a fondness overcome him. Carving his way through frozen land and barren ground, he had found a way, a place to be. Plant his roots and grow.

"Of course." Nie Mingjue nodded, then gestured between himself and Huaisang just to unfreeze himself from his unexpected stupor. "We will see all of you for lunch, I assume?"

"Sure!" Wei Wuxian chuckled. "Unless a-Yuan decides he likes the outdoors more than food. I swear, since the snow started thawing he and Wen Ning spend more time outside than in."

"Ah yes!" Huaisang exclaimed, a laugh curling his lips. "When there's a whole mountain to explore, the dining room gets way too boring! I definitely relate! And there's so much to explore, Qinghe's mountains are only second to the Cloud Recesses."

"Nie-xiong!" Wei Wuxian exclaimed, eyes wide offense that Nie Mingjue could tell was overplayed, but not entirely fake either. "You compare a magnificent place like Qinghe with those boring Cloud Recesses? And call yourself a Nie?!"

Huaisang laughed so hard that he clutched at his sides.

"Wei-xiong! You're right!" His little brother agreed, face bright like it hadn't been in a long time before turning its full glow to Nie Mingjue. "Have mercy, da-ge, for the treason of this poor fool who calls himself your little brother!"

Nie Mingjue could have told them to cut it off. He could have reprimanded them to get it together and go clean the mess they created, before they swiftly returned to their duties. The sun was just above the peak of the mountain on its way to the zenith, its harsh brightness akin to a command, calling forth the life hidden beneath the frozen land.

"We do not grant exceptions, Huaisang." He nodded gravely. "Your trespasses will be judged by our laws just as anyone else's."

"Da-ge!" The deep betrayal was audible in Huaisang's cry the same as the joy was in Wei Wuxian's laugh, loud and bright as the aforementioned sun above them.

Nie Mingjue smiled.

Spring has arrived.