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Published:
2020-11-22
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3,320
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1/1
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13
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Paean

Summary:

"Can you still remember the times I said 'I love you?'"

Her eyes were sparkling, just like how it was before.

With the most beautiful smile, she said, "Yes."

Doh Kyungsoo reminisces the first time he fell in love with his wife, and as each day had passed, made him fall for her more and more than he could ever imagine.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

It was a beautiful night for a stroll along the beach. The moon shone brightly as it illuminates everything it touches, reflecting its mellow light. The soft sound of waves splashing on the beach and the feel of the soft sand on Kyungsoo's feet was definitely relaxing to him.

Today marks his first day of retirement after 25 years of working as in the corporate world and frankly, he find it very liberating. The stress of meeting deadlines, working with unreasonable bosses and inconsiderate workmates, all those sleepless nights during their planning season, Kyungsoo find it hard to believe that he was able to last 25 years in that company. But despite of the many downs of working there, he never forgets the goodness it brought to his life.

And as his mind started to wander off from the past, he heard his favorite voice calling out his name.

"Yah! Kyungsoo-ah! What are you doing out here walking without your sweater?" He turned around to see his beautiful wife walking towards him. Her angelic, bright face were glowing under the light of the moon. His mouth started to spread into a smile and he opened his arms inviting her to a warm hug.

Pouting his lips, he spoke, "I don't need a sweater. I need my wife's hug to keep me warm." He rarely does aegyo. In fact, he hates it. But he knows that his wife loves it, so he does it especially for her, and for her alone.

When she finally reached him, he reached out to hold her hands and pulled her in into a warm embrace. He nuzzled his face on the her neck, inhaling her sweet scent--his favorite scent. His wife couldn't help but chuckle at her husband's actions. "I'm suspicious." She playfully said as she pulled away from his hug. Confused by what she said, Kyungsoo furrowed his eyebrows and blinked thrice before questioning her.

"Suspicious?"

A playful smile spread across her face as he bopped his nose, "Was it you who ate the last piece of cake I left on the fridge? You know Renjun's going to throw a fit when he founds out his dad didn't even consider to give him the last piece of his favorite dessert?"

When Kyungsoo was about to complain that it wasn't him who ate it, but when his wife saw the change in his expression, she leaned in and gave a small peck on his lips.

"I'm kidding, honey." She grabbed his hand and intertwined it together as they walked towards a nearby beach sofa bed.

As they settled in, with Kyungsoo wrapping an arm around his wife, they both fell into a comforting silence as they watched the bright moon and the twinkling stars in the sky. He enjoys times likes this. To some, silence can be deafening and uncomfortable, but for Kyungsoo and Seungwan, this is the time wherein they discovered, their presence was enough for them to make each moment a treasure.

 


 

The cool breeze made Seungwan snuggle closer to Kyungsoo. She likes these kinds of moments, he knew. Just laying down and enjoying each others company. It has been their thing when they started dating. She told him that she was nervous at first that he'll find her boring and break it off with her. He smiled at that memory. He looked down at to see her eyes closed, but he knew she was still awake.

"Wan."

"Hm?"

He placed a soft kiss on top of her head, which made her open her eyes as she looked up and met his.

"When was the last time I sang to you?"

Seungwan pursed his mouth as she thought hard. "Hmm, during my birthday. Why?"

He shifted his body so that he was now facing her, "I wanted to sing a song for you." With a tender smile, she waited for him to start.

 

You are the one girl
And you know that it's true
I'm feeling younger
Every time that I'm alone with you

 

As he sang those lines, everything that had happened between them flashed before his eyes. From the moment that they first met during their freshmen mixer party. He recalled how he dreaded going there when his best friend, Chanyeol practically dragged him. He was sitting at the farthest end of the table, away from the noisy seniors, when a girl wearing a white sweater that's obviously twice her size, sat in front of him and smiled. 

And Kyungsoo would have never thought back then that he would be enjoying her company, zoning out all the noises and only focusing to her rich, sweet laughter and giggles as she talks about her embarrassing moment during her first day in the university. It was at that moment, Kyungsoo knew that this girl is special and he wanted to know more of her. And so, he left that place with her number saved on his phone.

 

We were sitting in a parked car
Stealing kisses in the front yard
We got questions we should not ask

 

It didn't took them long enough to become friends. Though they were from different courses—he was taking up business management, while she was taking education—it didn't stop them from meeting up every time that their lunch breaks matches. Hang out during their free time and having those late night calls that would lead Seungwan sleeping before she could even hang up their call, to which Kyungsoo finds adorable.

And it didn't took Kyungsoo long enough to know and realize that he was falling for this kind, caring, and loving girl. 

"I'm in love with you."

He remembers how he confessed to her inside his car while they were at some movie drive-in while watching Adam Sandler's and Drew Barrymore's the Wedding Singer. It was during the scene where they were in the airplane and Adam was able to get help from Billy Idol and the other passengers from the first class seat to help him get the girl he loves. As Adam sang the first line of the song, some how, Kyungsoo wanted that too—with her. He wanted to be the one who makes Seungwan smile whenever she's sad, be the one to take care of her whenever she's down and to be the one to make create and share all kinds of memories together.

When Adam stopped singing, Kyungsoo turned to Seungwan and held her hand, to which surprised her, and confessed. Luckily for him, she was in love with him, too. And they ended the night with a sweet, soft kiss.

 


 

As they graduated and found jobs, things weren't as easy as it was when they were during their university days. Over the course of time, time for work had become demanding and their weekly weekend dates became once a month, their usual nightly routine of video calls where lessened into once a week and now, Kyungsoo's the one who falls asleep in the middle of their video calls.

Stress from work, pressure from his boss and gossip among his workmates made Kyungsoo almost irritable everyday. It had come to a point wherein he had hurt her feelings.

"I told you to put the condiments on the cabinet, not on the rack. Jeez! How many times should I keep telling you this?" He saw how Seungwan was dumbfounded by how he talked to her. This day was supposed to be their first date after two months of now being able to see each other. He wanted to rest with her and just spend the entire day focused on her. But then his boss called him up to create a presentation that he needs by 6PM tonight. Thankfully, his girlfriend was kind and understanding enough to postpone their date, and just settled to make him lunch. Then, it happened. 

After receiving a call from his boss, yelling at him for a mispelled word in one slide, he lost his cool. And when he went to the kitchen to get some water, he saw how the condiments his girlfriend used was placed in the rack instead of the cabinet where all of his herbs and condiments were. He marched towards the living room where Seungwan was peacefully reading a book and called her out. The moment he saw her expression changed was the moment he knew he messed it up.

Without uttering any word, Seungwan got up, grabbed the condiments he was holding and went into the kitchen. Kyungsoo wanted to beat himself up for the way he poured out his anger towards her. She had been understanding enough and not once had complained whenever he cancels their dates. He bit his lip out of anger towards himself and his carelessness and went to go to the kitchen.

He saw Seungwan standing in front of the sink, both hands were gripping at the end of the counter and her shoulders where moving up and down. When he heard soft sobs coming from her, he it broke his heart. Slowly, he made his way towards her and when encircled his arms around his waist pulling her closer. 

"I'm sorry for lashing out on you, Wan. I'm so sorry."

She didn't say anything, but her sobs became louder after he apologized. How can he be so insensitive? They stayed in that position until Seungwan had calmed down. She held his arms that were around her waist and removed them from her. Turning around, Kyungsoo saw how red and puffy her eyes were. He wanted to hold her cheeks and pull her into a hug and kiss her until the pain he caused her went away. But he knew better. Instead, he waited until it was Seungwan who took the initiative to touch his face.

"Let's take a break?"

 


 

In the summer, as the lilacs bloom
Love flows deeper than the river
Every moment that I spend with you

 

It was spontaneous and Kyungsoo wasn't a fan of spontaneity. But, Seungwan was right, he did needed this. When she told him yesterday to take a break, he thought that he had lost her. He thought that Seungwan gave up on him and wanted to part ways, but fortunately for him, what she want was for him to take a break from all the stresses of his life and spend three days away from the city.

Seungwan was driving and humming to song playing on the radio while Kyungsoo was just staring at her. There were a lot of things that he wanted to ask, things that he wanted to say to her. It's been a year since they've began this relationship and he can't understand the amount of patience she has with him. She notices him staring, "I know you love me but I didn't know you love me that much to keep staring at me for past twenty minutes." She jokingly said.

"Why?" The word came out of his mouth before he could stop himself.

As if she understood what it meant, she smiled, eyes still on the road. "Because love is more than just a word, Kyungsoo."

They spent the their entire three days just doing the things that they didn't get to do in the city. Eating out, going to the beach, learning how to make ceramics, fishing, dancing with no music, talking just about everything until the sun rises to a new morn and just staying by each others side.

It was their last night before they went back to the city and they were outside, laid down on the lawn and watching the beautiful night sky. Kyungsoo began humming to a song that made Seungwan smile.

"Sing it, please."

"Hm?"

"The song that you were humming, sing it please."

And so he did. He was singing to Adam Sandler's I Wanna Grow Old With You, the song in which started everything that they are now. "Oh, I could be the man, that grows old with you. I wanna grow old with you."

After finishing the song, he propped up his elbow and turned to her, "Wan, I'm sorry. I know that what I did to you was wrong. Lashing out my frustrations on you was wrong. I—"

Kyungsoo was not able to finish when he felt Seungwan's hand on her cheek. He looked back at her glistening eyes as if he could see his own reflection from hers. She gently caressed his cheek and spoke, "I already forgave you, Soo. I know that hurting me wasn't your intention, but I hope that you'll learn to also speak up. I don't like seeing you like that."

He couldn't believe the words that came out of her mouth. She already forgave me? She understood? Her eyes shown sincerity from the words that she spoke. Kyungsoo gently placed his temple on hers, their breaths kissing as they were only now a few centimeters apart.

"What did I even do to have you in my life?" He placed a soft, gently kiss on her temple, then it traveled down on her eyes, to her nose, then her cheeks and lastly, at her sweet, soft lips.

Before their kiss got even deeper, they broke apart catching their breath. "I love you, Seungwan."

"I love you, too, Kyungsoo."

 


 

We were sat upon our best friend's roof
I had both of my arms round you
Watching the sunrise replace the moon

 

"Hey."

Kyungsoo got startled when someone spoke from behind him. He was casually lounging at the balcony, thinking about the greatest change that will happen in his life, when Seungwan showed up from behind him.

His eyes widened at the sight of his fiance.

"Yah, you shouldn't be here. It's bad luck for the bride and groom to meet before the wedding." But she ignored what he said and sat beside him.

"I don't really believe in that, you know." She simply said as she tucked in her legs and wrapped her arms around it. She nestled her head on top of it while facing Kyungsoo. Seeing how she was positioned, he knew that the cold night breeze was making her uncomfortable. So, she scooted next to her and took off his cardigan and placed it around her as he pulled her closer to him for more heat.

She smiled at his gesture. "What are you doing here? It's two in the morning, Soo."

"I was just thinking."

She leaned away from him a bit to look at his face, "You're not...having second thought or—"

"What, no! Of course not. I would never—"

She giggled at his reaction. "I'm kidding, Soo. Just teasing you."

Seungwan had always find him cute whenever he's flustered. She said to him, he looked like an innocent little boy who was pleading his innocence after being framed from stealing a piece of cookie from a cookie jar. He poked her side, "Yah."

"But seriously, thought, what's on your mind?"

He didn't need to think hard. Kyungsoo knew that he can tell anything and everything that's on his mind to Seungwan. One of the things that he loves about her is that she listens well. She never interrupts him, and never once has she judged him with his opinions and thoughts. It feels like being in a safe place when he talks with her.

"I was just thinking how different our life will be after our I do's tomorrow." She just stared at him and kept silent as he continued on.

"You know, Wan, during the mixer party back in our freshman year, I had not intention of talking to anyone that night. That was until you sat in front of me wearing that sweet, beautiful smile. I feel like as the more we talked, the more that I wanted to get to know you."

"Is that why you took my number?"

She was teasing him again, but to her surprise, the strong, blunt confirmation from Kyungsoo caught her off guard. "Yes. Because I was attracted to you then. I mean, I won't say I fell in love with you at first sight. I actually don't believe in that. But you...you had something special that kept me wanting to draw near to you, to know you, to want you. And now," He tucked away a loose strand of hair on her ear and stared at her lovingly.

"Eight years later, here we are. Tomorrow, we'll be starting a new life together. Just how I wanted it the moment Adam Sandler sang to Drew Barrymore how he wanted to grow old with her." He paused for a moment before continuing.

"I wanted to grow old with you, too, Seungwan. I wanted to wake up everyday knowing that it's your face that I see first thing when I open my eyes. I wanted to be there to witness every laughter and joy, to be the one to wipe away your tear and comfort you whenever you're sad. To be able to lean on each other when times get rough. To take care of you, to shower you with love, not just in words because you deserve more than the verbal affirmation of my love for you, Wan. I wanted all that, and now, we'll be on the starting line to that dream of mine."

Tears suddenly ran down Seungwan's face, but he knew that those weren't tears from a hurting heart. Those were tears coming from a heart that had received so much love that the overwhelming feeling resulted into happy tears. He gently wiped away the tears from her face.

"If my face looks all puffed up, I'm blaming you on this." She said as they both laughed.

"Come on, I'll take you back to your room. We don't want you looking like a panda tomorrow." He got up and reached out her hand to help her stand up and made their way back to her room.

After tucking her in and gently placing a soft kiss on her temple, he bid her good night. But before he was about to walk, he reached out to stop him. "Hm?"

"Can you sing a song for me before you go?"

Seungwan didn't need to tell him twice. He sat down on the floor as he held her hand and started to sing.

"I wanna make you smile whenever you're sad
Carry you around when your arthritis is bad
All I wanna do is grow old with you..."

Before he could finish the song, she was already asleep. With one last kiss, he bid her good night. "See you tomorrow at the end of the aisle, my love."

And with a soft whisper, he told her those three words that gave her a smile as she fell deep into her sleep.

 


 

How would you feel, if I told you I loved you?
It's just something that I want to do
I'll be taking my time, spending my life
Falling deeper in love with you
So tell me that you love me too

 

After he sang the last sentence, they remained silent, just looking at each other with so much love.

"That was a new song. I thought you were going to sing our song?"

Caressing her cheek, he spoke, "This is my song for you, Wan. There wasn't a day that had passed that my love for you had lessen. In fact, everyday, I'm surprising myself at how much I still fall in love with you deeper and deeper."

Placing her hand on his, she smiled as he continued on, "Can you still remember the times I said 'I love you?'"

Her eyes were sparkling, just like how it was before. 

With the most beautiful smile, she said, "Yes."

He placed a hand on her nape and pulled her closer until their foreheads were touching, ever so gently. With a smile on both their faces; no words needed to be uttered, they knew.

 

Notes:

Hello!

This commissioned story is for @patwrites_ on twitter :)
The collected commission from this story was donated to a local donation drive to help our brethren in Cagayan (PH) that was greatly affected by Typhoon Ulysses.

Hope guys you liked the story!