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I Don’t Do Fake Love (but I’ll take some from you tonight)

Summary:

Beatrice needs a way to inherit the family business in order for it not to go up in flames in the hands of her siblings or cousins. And the only way she'll have a fair shot of inheriting it is by showing her family that she has her life together. Her love life, that is. And Ava is more than willing to help out.

Notes:

Hi hi! So, this is basically a fake dating AU. No halo, no demons, no fighting and action stuff. This is mostly just lighthearted fun since fake dating AUs have a lot of potential for that. This chapter is a bit vague in some parts, but all will be revealed as we go along. I hope you enjoy! Title is based on Bloody Valentine by MGK.

Chapter 1: Problem Solved

Chapter Text

 

“What if we hire you an escort?” 

 

Everyone turned to Lilith as she says those words, the girls staring at her like she’s suddenly grown two heads. 

 

“What? I think it’s a brilliant idea.” 

 

Beatrice groans and drops her head onto the table, the loud thud surely having a painful impact on her forehead. Camila rubs her friend’s back, wanting to at least give her a little bit of comfort during this difficult time. 

 

They were all doing their own thing early on that day before Beatrice called all of them up frantically and asked to meet. Which didn’t happen often. It didn’t happen at all, actually. Which is why everyone immediately dropped what they were doing so they could go support their friend. 

 

“Lilith we’re not going to hire a potential prostitute who might just take advantage of Beatrice’s status. That’s insane.” Mary shakes her head as she shoots Lilith a look. 

 

“Well then what else can we do? I don’t hear you lot coming up with any ideas. Clearly, it’s the only option we have here.” 

 

Shannon sighs as she looks over at Beatrice, feeling bad that her friend has to go through this. “Surely not. Come on, I’m positive we can think of something that will work.” 

 

“Face it, Shannon. There’s no way I will ever stand a chance in this twisted little game that my family has set up for us. I’m screwed—“

 

Beatrice’s words cut off as the door sharply swings open, revealing the living tornado herself.

 

“I’m here! I’m sorry I’m late but I’m here!” She exclaims as she stumbles into the room, balancing her bag, the stuff she was holding, and the boxes that she carried in her arms. 

 

Lilith of course rolled her eyes at the entrance. “How typical. Someone is having a crisis over here and you’re late.” She says while Camila helps Ava with her things. 

 

“Hey I have a good reason! Plus, this is my apartment too you know. Technically, I can’t be late to my own home.” Ava points out as she wrestles with her coat to free herself before dropping down in her chair beside Beatrice. “I also got Bea’s favorite pastries from that bakery. Oh and donuts. Because I know you guys weren’t gonna bring snacks.” 

 

Mary nods, impressed. “Good call, baby H. An unhealthy call, but a good call nonetheless.” 

 

“What can I say? I know what my best friend needs.” Ava grins, pretending not to see Lilith already taking some pastries out of the box for herself since she wasn’t going to deny it, that bakery makes a lot of good food. 

 

Shannon shakes her head fondly at the girls before her before getting back into business. “So Ava, I’m assuming you’re all caught up in the Beatrice family drama department?” 

 

“I’m not, actually. I was in a meeting all day and Beatrice called me like she did to you guys. Didn’t say anything else so I’m assuming it’s new drama. Otherwise I would’ve heard about it last night.” Ava shrugs as she takes a donut for herself before turning to Beatrice who still had her head down on the table. 

 

Camila pats Beatrice back, the other girl not having a choice but to look up so she can explain to her roommate what she just heard from her family. 

 

“My parents are hosting a family reunion back in England. They’re expecting me to come and will not be taking no for an answer.” Beatrice says while Ava scrunches up her nose before shaking her head. “You’ve always said no to them before, Bea. Even when they say you can’t. Just say no again. It’s not like they’ll send someone to kidnap you or something.” 

 

Mary snorts, causing Shannon to hit her arm. But she speaks anyway. “C’mon. With Beatrice’s family? That’s not out of the realm of possibility.” 

 

“She’s not wrong.” Lilith agrees. 

 

Shannon shoots the two a glare before sighing deeply. “Not helping, people. We should be finding ways on how to help Beatrice through this.”

 

“Uh, hello? Problem solved. Like I said, just say no and lay low for a few months. Bea’s done it a lot of times before.” Ava points out before Lilith speaks out to disagree. “Problem not solved, you idiot. Because the reunion is to decide who gets to take over Beatrice’s family business. She has to be there.”

 

Ava looks over to Beatrice for confirmation. Beatrice nods before rubbing her face with her hands. “She’s right. I didn’t think it would happen this early on, but it’s happening. That means I have to be there. There’s just no other choice. And it’s not just me. It’s my siblings and cousins and aunts and uncles who want to make sure that their child gets the company.”

 

“Oh. But...your parents are currently running that. Right? Shouldn’t it just be between you and your siblings?” Ava asks, to which Beatrice shakes her head no. 

 

“I’m afraid it doesn’t work that way with us. My cousins get a fair shot at it if they’re deemed fit enough to run the company.” 

 

Lilith scoffs at that. “Oh please. Fit enough? We both know your cousins are idiots who’ll run the company down into hell. And your siblings are no better. Everyone knows you’re meant to be the one in charge of that.” 

 

Which was true. Beatrice, despite being the youngest out of her siblings and cousins, clearly had her life together the most. Always excelled in school and university, was never in any trouble growing up. And it wasn’t a secret that her grandparents favored her dearly. Really, there shouldn’t be any competition. 

 

“It’s not like I can do much about it, Lilith. You know how it works.” Beatrice says, making Ava furrow her eyebrows. “Wait, how exactly does it work?” 

 

Camila nods, a bit confused as well. “Yeah. If everyone knows that it should be you who should inherit the business, then what do you need to figure out? They can just pass it over to you and the company will be in good hands. Why do they have to hold a whole reunion for that obvious decision?”

 

“It’s not that simple.” Shannon answers for Beatrice, having known Beatrice and her family the longest besides Lilith. After all, the three of them have practically grown up in the same social circle. 

 

“Why not?” Ava asks, making Mary chuckle. “Cause rich people love to make things complicated for their children. Pretty sure that one day, they’re gonna hold their very own hunger games. Except they’ll be playing for their fortune and societal status.” 

 

Lilith rolls her eyes and was about to retort before Beatrice holds her hand up to stop her, choosing to speak instead. “It’s not simple because they need to figure out a long term plan. Who has the better support, who has a better home life who can balance both family and work, who has the best ideas to keep the company afloat, that sort of thing.” 

 

“See the whole long term plan thing is just bullshit because you guys get to fight it out every generation. What’s the point with the long term plan? You can get the company now, but once your kids come of age? There’s no guarantee it’s theirs. They’re just gonna have to fight it out with their brothers and sisters and cousins just like you have to. Honestly, all bullshit with that long term plan crap.” Mary shakes her head before standing up from her seat so she can head into the kitchen to grab a beer for herself. Ava and Beatrice made sure to keep a stock of everyone’s preferred drinks in their fridge for occasions like these. 

 

Ava looks at Beatrice, still trying to work out the mess that was given. “Wait. You said they still have to figure stuff out. Well, what else is there to figure out? You have your life together, you’re fucking brilliant at everything so that’s not an issue, you have support from both family and friends, and your relationship with your family is getting better and better. You should still be top dog for that position.” 

 

“That’s not the kind of support and family life her family is looking for.” Lilith almost smirks, knowing this is where they left off in their earlier conversation before Ava came in. 

 

“What?” 

 

“The whole reason why Beatrice isn’t just decided to be the one to take over is because of family. Bea’s not getting the company unless she has a family of her own.” Lilith explains, clearly finding some amusement in the situation while Beatrice rubbed the bridge of her nose, feeling the migraine she had coming back. 

 

But of course Ava, bless her, still looked thoroughly confused. “Wait, what? Beatrice can only get her family’s company if she has a family of her own?” 

 

“Bingo.” Lilith nods. “Or at least she’s stable in the whole home life situation. You know. Marriage, kids, at the very least dating someone long term with plans of sticking with each other in the future. And she clearly doesn’t have that. Meanwhile her brothers are married and have kids, her sister is also married. Same situation with her cousins. She’s the only one left who’s single.” 

 

“Well she’s twenty fucking four!“ Ava defends, always on Beatrice side. Which wasn’t surprising. “Do they really expect her to have all that figured out already? Her brothers and sister are like what? Thirty something years olds? Pretty sure her cousins are the same. That’s not fair at all.” 

 

Mary of course, chooses that moment to come back into the room. “Since when has them rich families ever cared about what’s fair?” 

 

“I hate to say it, but she’s right.” Camila sighs, looking at Beatrice. “That’s not fair on you. But also, what can you do? Do you have a shot at least?” 

 

But Ava had a different question in mind. “Do you even want the company?” 

 

Everyone looks at Ava, clearly not expecting her question at all. Here they were, trying to figure out how Beatrice could have the position, when they haven’t even asked her if she actually wanted it. 

 

“Well…” Beatrice trails off, her eyebrows scrunching up as she thinks about it. Ava has always found that adorable. “If I don’t take it, there’s a good chance it’ll go up in flames in a year or so. I love my family, but they’re in over their heads if they think they can run the business properly. Plus, most of them want it for the wrong reasons. I admit, I have put some thought into it, and while I don’t mind taking over, I didn’t think I’d have to decide this soon if I really want it or not. I suppose it’s the right thing to do. For the sake of my family. But even if I a hundred percent wanted it, it’s not like I have a fair shot of getting it now.” 

 

“Because you’re super single and super gay.” Lilith nods thoughtfully, making Camila slap her arm lightly. “What? It’s not like she can just get knocked up on her own so she can have an heir.” 

 

“Lilith!” Camila hissed, giving her best intimidating look. Honestly, she just looked like an adorable deer. 

 

Mary couldn’t help but laugh at the clear burning of Beatrice’s cheeks. Shannon tries to shush her, although Lilith quickly joined in. Ava glares at the two before rubbing Beatrice’s back. “Don’t listen to those unhelpful dickheads. It’s okay, Bea. We’ll figure this out. You know, without the whole children and marriage thing.” 

 

“Yeah! Your family only expects for you to be dating someone long term, right? That shouldn’t be hard to do. How long do we have before you have to fly back home?” Camila asks. 

 

Beatrice sighs but answers anyway. “I leave next Wednesday.” 

 

“Next Wednesday! What the fuck!” Ava exclaims. “That’s not a lot of time.” 

 

“I know.” Once again, Beatrice lets her head drop onto the table, her forehead getting all of the impact. That was surely going to leave a mark. “I’m screwed.” 

 

The other girls exchanged worried glances, unsure of what else to do for their friend. Obviously, they couldn’t find someone for Beatrice to date. They couldn’t just hire an escort for her either. So, what else was there to do? 

 

“Well then, date me.” Ava suddenly says, making Beatrice practically choke on nothing as the others gape at her. 

 

Beatrice lifts her head up after she was sure she could keep the blush that threatened to creep up under control so she could do the same. Did she actually hear Ava correctly?

 

“I’m sorry, what?” 

 

Ava rolls her eyes, the cheeky grin she always has finding its way to her lips. “What? Are you deaf now? I said date me.” 

 

Beatrice stares at Ava for a long time, as did everyone else. It was no secret that Ava’s her best friend in addition to being her roommate. They met through Mary when Beatrice tagged along with Shannon (who’s just started dating Mary) to a party while they were on a holiday with Lilith after graduation. And ever since then, they’ve been inseparable. And Beatrice wasn’t going to lie, she’s had feelings for Ava for a while now. While she knows that Ava is also into girls, she knew that there was no way Ava would ever have a thing for her. So she never pursued anything in fear of it ruining their friendship. 

 

“Oh my God, people. Seriously? Stop staring at me, that’s creepy.” Ava says after a while, clapping her hands a few times in an attempt to get everyone to stop looking at her. “Look, Beatrice needs her family to believe that she’s got her love life together in order for them to give her the company. So, she just needs to pretend to date me. 

 

Ava turns to Beatrice, giving her a small smile. “It makes sense. We already live together and I know basically everything about you. Just say that I’m your girlfriend and all that serious about our future mumbo jumbo and you’re set. Business is yours, and we can just say that we broke up down the road. It’s not like you’re around them constantly that they’ll notice something is off.” 

 

It was Lilith who spoke up first. “That’s...that’s actually not a bad idea.” 

 

Beatrice turned to look at Lilith. “You actually support that plan?” 

 

“Well it does make sense, doesn’t it? Plus, you wouldn’t have to tell Ava all the things she needs to know in order to keep you happy and all that. Because she already knows. And it’s not like your family is opposed to you bringing a girl home. They’ve given up trying to set you up with a guy for a while now so it’s not gonna come as a shocker.” 

 

Shannon nods along with Mary. “She’s not wrong, you know. That might just solve your problem here, Bea. Better than the escort plan from earlier.” 

 

“See? It’s a great plan. I told you, problem solved! Am I great or what?” Ava wiggles her eyebrows, entirely unaware of how Beatrice can barely breathe properly due to how fast her heart rate is going. “Wait, what escort plan? You had an escort plan?”

 

Camila throws Beatrice a concerned look, knowing full well of her crush on Ava. It was going to be difficult, but maybe this plan was just what was needed in order for the two to realize their feelings for each other. And Camila was damn well going to nudge it along. “You don’t really have much a choice here, Bea. Unless you’re willing to give up your family’s company and have someone else take over.” 

 

She was right. Beatrice needed to do this in order not to let her family’s business go up in flames. She was obligated to at least try, right? What was the worst that could happen?

 

Finally, after a moment, she looks at Ava. “Pack your bags then, love. You’re meeting the parents.”