Archive of Our Own

About a year ago Eric Bittle decided to join an MMORPG; it was something he thought could use to kill time and didn't think it would hurt to play on. Sure, it was pretty.. geeky, but he figured it might be fun. As it turned out, it was also highly addictive.

Quickly after he joined, Eric became just a bit obsessed with the game. (So maybe spending ten hours fighting orcs was unhealthy. Sue him.) After becoming Level 58 in about three days, he was accepted to join a clan.

Downside: Everyone was much more experienced. And the clan was led by one of the most well-known [and fearsome] players, wunderkind1. And wunderkind1 probably hated him.

Upside: Everyone else was patient and helpful.

So Eric (now dubbed Bitty by the clan) made a group of friends who had the same, albiet dumb, interests as him.

He still couldn't believe he was going to meet some of them. It felt surreal and almost terrifying.

Though it wasn't like some of them hadn't met before. Ransom (held_for_ransom93) and Holster (fromtheholster) had met in before, at Niagra Falls--and so had Shitty (shittyknight) and [the infamous] Jack (wunderkind1).

That didn't calm his nerves. He bounced from one leg to the other in the lobby of the convention center, waiting for the others to appear. They had agreed to meet there at 3 pm, and Eric had been so restless he showed up at 1:30. He had been pacing around the lobby the whole time, clinging to the pies he brought and checking his watch every so often. Whenever someone walked by who he thought could have been his online friend, Eric looked at them excitedly until they walked past.

"How long have you been here?"

He jumped at the sound of a human voice, earning a chuckle in reply. He wheeled around, and grinned at the figure in front of him.

The same mustache and flowing hair that was in the picture Eric had been sent the day they agreed to meet up.

"Hey, Shitty," He said, still smiling at the taller male.

"You're smaller than--are those fucking pies?" Shitty eagerly scooped the pile of pies from Eric's arms, staring at them hungrily.

"Homemade. Apple, blueberry, and cherry."

"Next time you need to bring banana cream; it's the best flavor."

Eric only smiled harder. Next time. He didn't even question if there would be a next time, he just knew.

The others slowly trickled in over the next half hour; Ransom and Holster were the last to show up, linked hands hanging lackadaisically between them.

Chowder (ca_chow) bounced on the balls of his feet, dressed head-to-toe in merchandise from various video games.

"This is so exciting!" he kept repeating in different tones, stressing each word a new way each time.

"Alright," Lardo (1_art) said, glancing over her list once again. "Here are the room assignments for the hotel. Everything was set up randomly by Shits and I, so if you see any problems let us know."

"Do I really have to--"

"Yes, Dex, you're stuck with Nursey. Unless you have a medical condition and need to be quarantined, you're going to be sleeping the the same room. Just be glad we opted for two beds instead of one."

"Then why do you get your own room?"

"Because there was an odd number of us all, and I organized this shit. When you figure out the prices months in advance and bargain to get us rooms all close to each other, then you can give yourself your own room."

--

List of things Chris Chow did not know:

1) Bitty snores.

2) Loudly. It kinda sounds like a freight train.

3) He also mumbles in his sleep.

Chris was excited when he found out his self-appointed "mentor" would be his roommate for the weekend, but he didn't feel so happy when it was 2:03 AM and he couldn't sleep.

The next morning, though, the rush of joy came back when he saw Bitty making pancakes for everyone in the lounge-and-kitchen area Lardo managed to rent out from the hotel.

"Those smell heavenly," Holster sighed, running a hand through his mussed-up hair as he walked into their private dining room.

"What, no one's going to mention my scrambled eggs?" Shitty said, passive-aggressively using a fork to poke at the burnt eggs in question.

"I don't think those are really... edible," Bitty said, glancing at the food and scrunching up his nose.

"I'll try some!" Chris eagerly piled up a few eggs on his plate, and shoved a piece into his mouth. He tried not to gag as when gulped it down, forcing a grin. "It's a little, um, crispy! Nothing ketchup can't handle!" He hurriedly stood up and headed for the fridge, combing for a bottle of ketchup.

"Who puts ketchup in the fridge?" Ransom asked, arms lazily wrapped around Holster's waist.

"Aren't you supposed to?" Chris asked, still poking through the many Styrofoam containers of food previous tourists had left in fridge. (He mentally reminded himself to steal all of the containers of pasta from the fridge before their weekend trip was over. If the people who left these wouldn't eat them, he figured someone would have to.)

"Yeah, it keeps it fresher," Shitty said with a nod, taking a bite from his masterpiece disaster.

Chris finally found the ketchup bottle tucked all the way at the back, and proceeded to douse his plateful of scrambled eggs with the red goo.

"That looks disgusting," Dex (poindexter24) said with a grimace, looking at Chowder's plate with horror.

"It's actually not that bad," he admitted, appreciating the overwhelming taste of tomato to balance out the egg.

"Pancakes are ready!" The room went silent as Bitty placed the stack of pancakes at the center of the table.

"It's.. It's glorious," Holster whispered, adjusting the glasses perched atop the bridge of his nose for a better view.

"Feel free to--"

Before Bitty could finish, the group attacked the mountain of golden flapjacks, mercilessly tearing it apart. Long-forgotten were Shitty's shitty eggs, for now there was a new era of breakfast food to be devoured.

The stack was gone within minutes, and the room was silent except for the sounds of chewing and "oh my god"s and "sweet jesus, bitty, where the fuck did you learn to bake like this"es.

Jack strolled in yawning to see only the leftover crumbs. "So, what's for breakfast?"

--

Lardo was kicking ass at this Super Smash competition, if she did say so herself. So far she had successfully defeated seven snobby douchebags who didn't think a short Vietnamese girl could be good at video games, and at least two of them left with tears in their eyes.

"Fuck, Lardo," Shitty said, watching her play with a mix of horror and amusement. "Since when were you so.. vicious?"

"Don't doubt me," she muttered in reply, downing her fourth can of Monster and violently mashing the buttons on her controller.

The screen flashed, and the guy in the Diablo t-shirt next to her groaned. "This is bullshit!"

"Who's gonna be the next victim?" Shitty yelled, a mischievous glint in his eyes.

The crowd roared with excitement as another geeky-looking guy sat in the cool metal chair next to Lardo and grabbed the controller.

"Let's do this," Lardo muttered, hitting the start button.

--

"And the honorable mention award goes to Adam Birkholtz and Justin Oluransi!"

Holster grinned with pride, clutching his boyfriend's hand tightly as they bowed together. The audience cheered for them as the host of the cosplay contest handed them the trophy, and Holster lifted it high above his head.

"Next year, I'm choosing our costumes," Ransom whispered through gritted teeth, adjusting the blonde wig resting on his head. The two were dressed as Rose and Blanche from the Golden Girls, idea courtesy of Holster.

"It better be good enough to top this," the taller male replied as they walked backstage. "And if you want to choose, you're going to have to do all of the sewing. Do you know how hard it is to fight with little old ladies in Jo-Ann's Fabrics and Walmart for the last pieces of cloth? It's hard, Justin. Very hard."

"How about Men in Black?" Ransom mused, still playing with the curls of his wig. "We'd look fucking sick and win for sure."

Holster paused to consider it. "Maybe."

--

Jack was sitting with a very excited Bitty, waiting for the panel to start.

"This is my favorite voice actor," Bitty sighed, watching the stage with an eager expression. "Seriously, he's been in a bunch of--"

"Let's get lunch," Jack said, cutting the Georgian off.

"N-now?" Bitty was startled by his frankness. "But we were going to watch the panel.."

"We can go later," Jack offered with a shrug, glancing down at Bitty. "I'm just hungry, and it could be fun."

Eric could feel his cheeks warming up a little. "That would be nice."

They ended up skipping the panel to go to a Denny's nearby. Jack and Bitty were some of the only people inside, but the quiet privacy was a welcomed break from the loud bustle of the convention. The two chatted away for a few hours, even after they had finished eating; they kept ordering appetizers and coffee to stay in the calmness of empty restaurant, and to spend more time together.

Bitty was surprised to realize that Jack didn't hate him. Surprised, and very happy.

--

The rest of the convention went smoothly. Ransom and Holster were continuously addressed as Rose and Blanche ("Well of course they'd notice the sexy grandma cosplayer," Holster had said with a smirk, imitating his character's southern twang, "how could they not remember me?") and Lardo had a new reputation amongst the gaming community after crushing every opponent that challenged her. Bitty and Jack continued to spend time on their own away from the group, and even agreed to meet up another time--just the two of them. Lardo promised to organize another meet-up for next year's convention, and Bitty made mini-pies for each member of their group.

For their last night together, they all agreed to go to a nice restaurant and eat out, since they were all too lazy to cook a full meal and wanted to celebrate.

Chowder was halfway on his drive home the next morning when he realized something.

"I forgot the doggie bag."