Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

The first day they met, Tartaglia didn't even get a chance to know his name before he was sentenced to what he could only describe as the most intense glare he had ever received.

He had many friends, despite being a transfer from their rival high school, but none would compare to the very first friend he made a week ago. Zhongli.

Zhongli was knowledgeable (a bit too knowledgeable for someone who was only a high school senior, Tartaglia had always thought), kind, welcoming. He was the very definition of book-smart. However, when it came to things such as, well, money, he was dumber than a rock. He also had a semi-shit taste in friends, not including himself. Namely, his best friend.

"Ah, Tartaglia. I have been meaning for you to meet my dearest friend since we met," was the first thing he told him when they met up in the cafeteria. Tartaglia took a hard look at the 'dearest friend' Zhongli was referring to.

The dearest friend was short. Not short in Venti-short, but he barely came up to Zhongli's shoulder. His amber eyes were Zhongli's, but wider, and if he looked close enough, it looked like his pupils were almost cat-like. The black hair was streaked with green, and it looked good, unlike Venti's. And he was short.

Was this guy Venti, but with orange contacts? Wait, no, he wasn't. Those eyes were narrowed in a very intense glare that made him sweat a bit.

"Tartaglia, meet Xiao. We have been friends since the fifth grade." Wow, friends for seven years. God knew he himself couldn't hold onto a friend for more than six months, and the group he ran with wasn't exactly what he'd call a 'friend group'.

"Nice to meet you, Xiao!" He greeted cheerfully, holding out his hand to shake it. Xiao looked at his hand, then back up at him. Tartaglia could feel sweat rolling down the back of his neck. Finally, the other reached out a gloved hand to shake.

"Same to you," he grunted, averting his eyes from his own blue ones. This guy already hated him, and the only words that he had ever said to him was a greeting. What the fuck.

Tartaglia groaned mentally in his head. How the hell was he supposed to be buddy-buddy with Zhongli if Xiao kept looking at him like he would murder him?

"I believe you two will get along great," Zhongli said casually, making him let out a tiny snort, and Xiao to raise an eyebrow. "Whatever you say," he muttered, going back to writing in his notebook. Tartaglia put his head in his hand, and sighed deeply into it.

He was going to make it his new mission to get into the good graces of Xiao. Maybe befriend him, but that part comes a lot later.

------

Xiao:
How the fuck did you get my number.

Xiao:
Yeah, alright, we got off to a shit start.
But that’s because I don’t fucking trust you.

Xiao:
I know where you’re from. That stupid Fatui highschool.
You deadass got suspended multiple times.
So if you fucking hurt him, I will end you.

Xiao:
Your actions will speak louder.
Prove that to me, and maybe i’ll go easy.

------

Tartaglia groaned, throwing his phone onto his bed. His roommate looked up from whatever the hell he was doing, an irritated expression on his face. "Could you maybe groan like a wounded animal somewhere else, Tartaglia?" he said scathingly. He glared at his roommate. "Shut up, Scaramouche. Nobody else wanted to share a room with you, so I took the fall."

"Nobody wanted to room with you either, so I took the fall for that," Scaramouche pointed out with a smirk. Tartaglia could feel his braincells fizzling out every second he had to interact with the short man. "Just shut the fuck up. We both hate each other, so why are we even talking?"

"There's nobody else to talk to," his roommate said, going back to studying his stupid astrology shit. Him and that other astrology buff (Mona, was it?) would get along great, if anyone could stand being around him for more then two minutes.

He put his douche roomie out of his mind, and instead focused on how he could get into Xiao's good graces. Perhaps he should ask Zhongli.

And this was only Day One.

------

The second day, Tartaglia almost got his perfect face imprinted into a locker. By Xiao. Who should not be able to do that, considering his height, but here they were, with him pinned against a locker by a boy that did reach his shoulder, but didn't go any higher.

How did it get there? He didn't even know. He was just going out to use the bathroom, when a wild Xiao literally came out of nowhere, and pinned him against the locker.

Tartaglia, against his good will, let out a low whistle. "Hopefully no teachers come out here. They may think we're doing some...unsatisfactory things," he said lowly. He felt Xiao shudder in disgust, his nose wrinkling. "Get your head out of the gutter," he snarled, pulling away.

"What's the social call about?" He asked once he pulled away from the locker, making sure the metal door wasn't dented. It was, and he felt sorry for the poor person that used this locker. It was also pretty big, but that was due to his height. Xiao crossed his arms, his eyes swimming with suspicion. "I know that the high school you came from actually trains its students in one of eleven fields. You were the top one in the eleventh field. Combat."

Tartaglia felt his eyes widen in genuine surprise. "How do you know that? You clearly didn't go there, or else I would've met you."

The shorter male held his phone up. "I Googled it. Obviously." Oh. Right.

"For someone who is supposedly very smart, you have the sense of a boulder," he continued, like he hadn't wounded Tartaglia's pride enough in the span of five minutes. "Yeah, yeah, what do you need me for? I'm assuming you didn't just assault me in the hallway just to dump shit on me I already know."

He watched as Xiao's mouth opened, then closed, and when it opened again, the bell rang. Of course.

Xiao hesitated for a moment, then muttered a quick 'talk to you later', and was gone with the sea of other teenagers that came flowing out of classes. Tartaglia watched him go, confusion making his head spin a bit. Did he really just say something that wasn't an info dump or something blunt? To him, of all people?

He felt his lips quirk up a little in a smile. That was one step forward.

------

He met Xiao behind the school during lunch hour. Zhongli was also there, surprisingly.

"You wanted to chat?" Tartaglia said casually as he strolled up. Xiao's head snapped up so quick, he thought he heard it crack. Zhongli gave him a small smile, with a short wave.

"Have you heard of Beidou? Big tits, lesbian probably, leads a gang that has broken more laws then your previous school?" Xiao asked. Tartaglia raised his eyebrows at the mention of his old school, but didn't comment on it. "Yeah. Isn't it the 'Crux Fleet' or something along those lines? People at my old school talked about them a lot." Zhongli was slowly nodding as he said those words.

"Yes. We have come to you because they requested we help them with their next heist."

What.

"That's cool and all, but what does this have to do with me?" Tartaglia questioned. Xiao pinched the bridge of his nose. "You're so fucking dense," he hissed. Another blow to his pride. In front of Zhongli, too.

"You're coming with us, whether you like it or not," Xiao told him. He felt his heart sink a bit. While he wasn't new to breaking the law, it still left a bad taste in his mouth. "How many times have you even done this?"

Zhongli was the one who answered this time. "This is my first time. Xiao has done this about five times now."

Five fucking times. Xiao was as much of a criminal as he was.

The black haired male noticed Tartaglia staring at him, and he scoffed. "They wanted a short person to fit through the vents. I was their best bet."

This small boy was insane, he concluded. He's known him for two days, and he was fucking insane.

"I have someone who might want to join in as well. He doesn't go here, but he lives for the thrill of crime." Xiao nodded. "Hit him up. We'll need all hands on deck for this one, apparently."

Zhongli frowned. "What do you mean? Are we not just breaking in a bank and simply taking their money?"

That earned the male a undeserved smack upside the head. Tartaglia noted that Xiao needed to stand on his toes in order to do that, and felt laughter bubbling up inside him. He kept it in though, because he himself would earn a much worse punishment then a 'smack upside the head'.

"If it's all hands on deck, it means we're raiding a big shot," Xiao explained. Tartaglia tilted his head. "There's plenty of big shots though. Got any idea of which one we're hitting?"

"Ningguang. Also big tits, also probably a lesbian, she's fucking loaded with cash, unlike Beidou."

He's heard that name before.

"They are dating, however. Would that not destroy their relationship?" Zhongli asked. Another smack upside the head. Tartaglia winced in pity.

"No, numbnuts. She'll be helping us get in," Xiao said, rubbing his hand. "Also, god fucking damn it, your head is harder then the boulder I punched once." The laughter from earlier was returning, and he needed to put his hand over his mouth to hide his grin. This earned a weird look from the other two, but neither of them questioned it.

"Text your partner, tell him the details I just delivered. We're all meeting up outside the Jade Mansion at ten. Don't be late," Xiao instructed. Tartaglia violently nodded his head, with made Xiao furrow his brow in confusion. "Are you okay? You're acting like a dumbass."

"Just peachy," he lied through his teeth. In all honesty, he was both terrified shitless of Xiao, and very amused by him all at once. The result was laughter, of course, because he thought it was dumb he was so scared of a teenager that came up to his shoulder and looked like he couldn't hold his own in a fight. But he was scared. Some what.

Xiao snorted, but didn't pester him further. He turned on his heel, and walked away, not looking back. Zhongli gave him a concerned look, but Tartaglia waved him off. "Go make sure he doesn't accidentally kill anybody."

When Zhongli left, Tartaglia sat down, pondering everything that just happened. Did this show that Xiao trusted him enough to pull off a heist as big as this, or was he simply using him, because he was skilled in combat?

Whatever the case was, he was happy to be included. He pulled out his phone, and had to scroll through his contacts list for a while, before hovering his thumb over the call button of the person he said he'd bring along.

He hit call, and brought the phone up to his ear.

"Tartaglia, what the fuck do you want?" A tired and very irritated voice came from the other end.

"Scaramouche, I have some crime you might be interested in..."

The other line went quiet for a minute, and then Scaramouche's voice was back. "Tell me more."

------

One thing Xiao was right about was that, holy shit, Beidou and Ningguang had some big boobs. He was here for a job though, plus they were probably lesbian.

"Yo, ginger guy and little guy! Over here!" Beidou called out, waving them over. Scaramouche stiffened. "Little guy?" He snarled, already starting to pull out the knife he had hidden on the side of his bicep. Tartaglia grabbed his wrist, and dragged him over, ignoring the spitting and the death threats.

He noted that while Zhongli was there, decked out fully in black, Xiao wasn't. That screamed suspicious. "Hey, Beidou? Xiao was the one who called me down here, so where is he?"

Beidou let out a laugh. "Oh, Xiao? That kid is our scout! He goes through the air vents and makes sure its dead in there. If it isn't, then he plans the best route for us."

"It is highly unlikely the Jade Mansion will be empty. Despite my parents being asleep at this hour, the guards and servants will present a different story," Ningguang explained calmly. Tartaglia noticed that both of the women were fucking tall. Beidou looked like she was Zhongli's height.

"Well, my name is Tartaglia, and this is my roommate and partner in crime, Scaramouche," he introduced, holding up his roomie by the wrist when introducing him. Scaramouche wiggled and hissed in his hold, like a cat.

Maybe him and Xiao would hit it off.

Zhongli snapped his fingers, making everyone turn their heads towards him. "Xiao is returning shortly. He told me that there are a lot more guards than Ningguang accounted for," he reported. Beidou cussed colorfully, while Ningguang herself sighed. "I had feared this."

Xiao's head came out of the air vent above Zhongli a minute later, followed by the upper half of his body. Zhongli grabbed him by his forearms, and pulled him the rest of the way out. "Thanks," he huffed to his friend, who responded with a hum. He turned to the two ladies and the other two men. "There's over ten guards in the front hall alone. The target, Ningguang's fathers office, is pretty much a straight shot down there. Not all of us can go in, we'll attract too much attention."

"Alright, thanks Xiao," Beidou ruffled his hair, making him squawk and bat her hand away. "Men, women, and acquaintances! The Crux will stay out here, and defend the border. If anyone questions you, say that you're hired for outside security!" She ordered. There was a chorus of 'yes, ma'am!' from her crew.

"Tart, Mouche, Zhongli, Xiao, and Ningguang, you're all with me."

"You call them by their full names, but not us?" Scaramouche complained. Beidou shrugged. "I don't know how to pronounce your names properly, so I had to improvise." Scaramouche opened his mouth to say something else, and Tartaglia slapped his hand over his mouth with a big smile. "Let's get going then!"

As the others went ahead, he felt something bite down, and he yanked his hand off of Scaramouche's mouth. "I know you're a douche, but why the fuck did you bite my hand instead of licking it?!" He screeched as quietly as he could, wiping down his hand on his dark jeans. His asshole of a roommate smugly shrugged, jogging to catch up with the rest of the group. Grumbling, Tartaglia went after him.

Ningguang slowly pushed the double doors open, and peered inside. "Yeah, there's a lot of guards. I don't know how we'll get around," she whispered back to the rest of the group. Xiao pulled up next to her, poking his head through the gap she left. "The pillars make shadows along the wall. We're all wearing dark clothing, so it should be fairly easy to get through, as long as we stick to the wall."

"Yeah, but, um, your eyes kinda glow in the dark, Xiao," Beidou said. Xiao turned to look at them, and she was right. They faintly glowed in the dark. He looked at Zhongli, who's face was also covered in shadows, and narrowed his eyes. "Holy shit, Zhongli's do too," he muttered, star-struck at the revelation.

"Hmm, seeing as our eyes somehow glow in dark settings, it would be wise for us to close our eyes while going through," the brown haired male reasoned. Ningguang shook her head. "We won't be able to guide you around if we can hardly see where we are going," she retorted.

Xiao made a gesture at Beidou, almost like unsheathing a blade. She nodded, and there was a glint of metal as she passed him something. He turned it around in his palm, then looked back up at her, his eyes showing how unimpressed he was. "A dagger," he said, his tone clipped. Beidou nodded again. He sighed. "I'll see what I can do with it."

"Woah, why the fuck does he have a dagger now?" Tartaglia questioned, taking a step back from the now-armed Xiao. He rolled his eyes, which looked really creepy when they were the only thing you could see on him in the dark. "Calm your tits. We're going to go through as normal, and if we get spotted, the ones who aren't armed will sprint for the office, while the ones who are armed will create a distraction."

"Right," Beidou confirmed, "me, Xiao, and Mouche are all armed, which leave Tart, Zhongli, and Ningguang to run for the office." That statement made Scaramouche sputter. "You're sending two people who have no experience breaking into places?!"

Ningguang held up one perfectly manicured hand. "They need me in there to crack the code to the safe. Zhongli has the bag we're going to store it all in. Tartaglia is just there for backup."

Being delegated to backup. His pride was in shambles at this rate.

Scaramouche shook his head. "Fuck it. This seems like a decent plan, so lets go."

They all silently filed into the main hall, sticking to the walls like Xiao told them. Tartaglia looked to his left, where the very person he was trying to gain favor with was. His pupils really were cat like. Now that he thought about it, there were many things that the common feral house cat and Xiao shared in common, such as being fer-

"Sound the alarms! We've got ourselves an intruder!"

A loud, shrieking wail went off, and they knew they had been caught. The hall flooded with light, blinding Tartaglia momentarily. When his sight returned to him, he realized that Zhongli was already tugging him along, with Ningguang leading the way. He risked a glance back, and saw that the other three were easily making a distraction.

He never really saw Scaramouche fight, even through all the time they had known each other, and seeing as he moved with the gracefulness of a fish in water, it was clear that he was well-versed in what he did. Beidou was like a train, using her height and muscle to barrel through the guards, and not even being scared to fight more then one at once. The smaller males tended to do one on ones when possible, while Beidou just punched and kicked at whatever she could reach. The unsheathed knife at her hip showed that she wasn't looking to take lives, just to incapitate.

He couldn't see Xiao in all the chaos, but assumed he was handling himself just as well.

He was yanked into the room by Zhongli, and Ningguang closed the doors behind them. "Start barricading the door while I work on the safe," she demanded, already heading to the mentioned money-holder. The two friends looked around the room, and Tartaglia took note of the seemingly heavy desk near the center of the room. The two looked at each other, nodded, and lifted the desk. Tartaglia almost let go of it due to the sheer weight of it, but manged to keep his grip on it. Right before it reached the door, they burst open.

Beidou was leading the other two, two of them bleeding from some place. Beidou was bleeding from her temple, but the blood had stopped by the time she shut the doors and helped them barricade it. Scaramouche was wheezing, making Zhongli go over and prompt him to sit down and catch his breath. Scaramouche, to Tartaglia's complete surprise, complied. Xiao was bleeding from his arm, but he had taken off the thin coat he'd brought with them, ripped off the arm, and tied it around. Catching his worried gaze, Xiao waved him off.

"I got it," Ningguang called out. Zhongli went over with the bag while Ningguang jogged over to her girlfriend, worriedly examining her bleeding head. Beidou pushed her hands away, laughing about not needing medical care. Ningguang retorted with the threat of a concussion, and Tartaglia tuned the bickering lovers out to assist Zhongli with the money.

"Holy shit," Xiao breathed when he got a look at how full the bag was. "Are you sure you'll be able to carry all that?"

Zhongli tied the bag shut. "I have no doubt. Money is not that heavy." Xiao let out a noise that sounded like a cross between a wheeze and a screech. "Wouldn't you like to know! You never carry any fucking money on you!"

Scaramouche, who had gotten up at some point, and was moving around perfectly fine, pushed open a window. "We can get out through here. Your crew should be just outside, right?" He asked Beidou, his eyes wild with the thrill of what was going on. She grinned. "My crew? I told 'em to go home, said things might get a bit too bloody for them. That's when I got my injury."

Xiao made another noise that sounded vaguely like a very wounded cat. Was he a cat in his former life?

"Just climb through the window," Ningguang snapped, "we're on the first floor anyways."

They let Zhongli go first, in case he needed to make a run for it with the money. Ningguang went next, followed by Tartaglia himself. As he hit the grass outside, he didn't register how far the fall was until he heard Scaramouche.

"This is how high up the first floor is?! It's as high as a fucking prison fence!" He shrieked from the top. Ningguang sighed, putting her head in her hands.

He jumped down anyways, yelping when Tartaglia caught him and lowered him to the grass. "You're fucking lucky Xiao's going to need help, or else i'd kick you in the balls," the shorter man seethed. Tartaglia let him go with a pat on the head, being rewarded with a kick to the shin instead of anywhere higher.

Xiao's face appeared over the windowsill, and when he saw who was going to catch him on the way down, his eyes shifted into a look of disgust. "The only reason i'm allowing you to fucking touch me right now is because I land on all fours, and my arm is injured," he yelled down. Tartaglia shot up a thumbs up, and down Xiao came.

He grunted as he caught the full weight of the boy in his arms. "Holy shit, you're heavy," he wheezed. Xiao hopped out of his arms, and did what Scaramouche threatened. Now Tartaglia was on the grass, holding his balls when Beidou came down. She clapped her hands together. "That's a wrap! Let's get the fuck out of here."

A hand seized him by the back of his jacket, and dragged him along. Tartaglia was in too much pain to comprehend who was dragging him, although he did catch sight of what looked like a sack filled with something, and hair hit him in the face a couple times.

He didn't know Ningguang's hair was brown.

------

"Apparently Beidou's leaving town for a while," Zhongli told the two of them two days later in school. Xiao hummed, picking at his food with little interest to it.

"Is Ningguang going with her? I still have to thank her for dragging me along with you guys," Tartaglia said, not noticing the bewildered looks the other two sitting across from him shared. "Yeah, Ningguang is going with her. They're lovers," Xiao muttered. "Also, Zhongli dragged you along with us. Not Ningguang."

Tartaglia blinked once. Twice. Three times. "Did I just indirectly call Zhongli a girl?" He whispered. Xiao slowly nodded. "Yep."

It was Zhongli's turn to blink multiple times at the both of them. "You two are interacting, and I sense no resentment."

Xiao frowned thoughtfully. "And so we are," he concluded, going back to picking at his food. Tartaglia sputtered. "And so we are? I thought you'd have a different reaction to that, considering you wanted to bite my head off a day or two ago!" He said indignantly. Xiao looked back up from his food. "We're acquaintances now. I wouldn't call us friends just yet. I still don't know anything about you."

Tartaglia felt a dumb smile spread across his face. Xiao raised a brow. "What?"

"You don't hate me anymore? We're semi-friends?" He asked excitedly. The black haired boy drew back a bit when he leaned closer. "I said acquaintances. Not friends," he refuted. It didn't matter what he said though. He just admitted he didn't hate him anymore, and that was enough for him.

"How many friends does he even have?" He directed to Zhongli. The tallest male closed his eyes for a few moments, and when he reopened them, the answer was enough to send his jaw crashing to the floor, and for Xiao to get the chopsticks he was eating with and attacking his friend with.

"I believe i'm his only close friend. When he says you're acquaintances, he means you're now friends. So two, I suppose. You and I."

------

"Scaramouche!" Tartaglia yelled when he kicked in his roommates door. There was a screech, and the sound of a body hitting the floor. When he entered the room, he saw an extremely pissed off Scaramouche on the floor, surrounded by his dumb astrology papers. Sitting on his bed was that girl he thought he'd get along with, Mona.

"I didn't know you had a boyfriend," she said casually, going back to her astrology book. Scaramouche made a dying rat noise, and all but lunged at him. "Tartaglia, what the fuck do you want?"

"Do you consider our raid party friends?" He asked. Mona looked up in mild interest. His roommate scoffed. "Maybe the one with the height similar to mine. We're like two sides of the same coin."

"Okay, so he has three friends. Great!" Tartaglia left the room. Scaramouche sighed, rubbing his face in exasperation and annoyance. Before he shut the door, Tartaglia poked his head back into the room with a smug smile. "Don't have any sexy times in here, by the way. The walls are thin," he teased. Scaramouche made another dying rat noise, and was very close to slamming the door shut on his head when he did it. Mona was on the bed, in hysterics.

Cackling to himself outside the door, Tartaglia opened his phone to the group chat the six of them had created.

------

Xiao:
You're fucking kidding me. Rat boy. Got a girlfriend.

Zhongli:
apparently miracles do happen

Scaramouche:
MONA IS NOT MY FUCKING GIRLFRIEND TARTAGLIA YOU BITCH

Beidou:
UJWBFHJDFHFJUW YEAH LITTLE MAN KEEP BEING IN DENIAL

Zhongli:
what does being in denial for a relationship mean if you know youre in one?

Xiao:
You don't love anyone besides that girl with the long, curly brown hair in our math class.

Zhongli:
yes guizhong is very beautiful, but we have never talked.

Xiao:
Your face gets red every time you talk about her.

Ningguang:
I can tell that the only mature person in this chat other than me is Xiao. That's disappointing.

Beidou:
look ik i aint mature and neither is tart and mouche but zhongli seems like he is

Ningguang:
Babe, he's dumber than a rock when it comes to being street smart.

Beidou:
good point

Xiao:
Please get educated on that soon Zhongli.

Zhongli: noted

Scaramouche:
WHY YOU LITTLE BASTARD

------

Tartaglia knew his life was going to end the moment he saw Scaramouche go offline. He decided to spend the final moments of his life seeing the reactions to his message, and maybe he'd get a laugh out of it.

------

Zhongli:
sexy pics?

Xiao:
If you mean nudes, i'll find your fucking house and beat the shit out of you.

Beidou:
SEXY PICS YOU MEAN NUDESHSHNJSBJS

Ningguang:
I just spat out my tea.

Xiao:
He meant thanks for becoming my friend.

Beidou:
how tf did you know that

Xiao:
What can I say? We just kinda bonded.

ZhonglI:
you just admitted to me you still hate him.

Xiao:
He's dead now, that's why I didn't mention it before.

Scaramouche:
yeah hes near death but i called an ambo

Xiao:
Oh fuck. Purge the chat.

Ningguang:
No.

Xiao:
Well, guess i'll die.