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It was the first thing that Hermione had wanted to eat for days, and while it might not have been the most healthy of choices, it was a food and she really wasn't going to complain about food as she sat down to tuck into her treacle tart. She had been forcing herself to eat crackers over the last twenty-four hours, ever since she had found out for certain that she was in fact pregnant, but crackers didn't exactly fill you up, nor did she think that they were a good substitute for an actual meal. So when she had gotten a whiff of the treacle tart that Mrs Weasley had made and not wanted to throw up, she had been more than happy to take a slice.
She ate alone - she was avoiding Ron until she had a clue about what she wanted to do. She knew that ideally she needed to tell him before she talked to Fred and George properly, so she was avoiding them as well, though neither of them had bee over since Hermione had seen Fred the day before. She knew that he was probably busy piecing everything together; she'd dropped a couple of hints inadvertently when he'd asked her if she was sick after all and it wasn't as if he was dense. She couldn't tell them before she told Ron though, could she?
Even if they were no longer together, this was still Ron's baby and he had the right to know before his brothers did. She let out a soft sigh as she stared at her plate for a little while. She supposed that she had to be grateful that they lived in a modern world now where people wouldn't expect them to get back together just because they had a baby together. She couldn't imagine anything more painful than being forced to be with someone that had broken her heart once already.
"Doing alright?" Ginny's voice was soft as she made her way into the kitchen. She had been avoiding Hermione since she had revealed her suspicions about Hermione being pregnant. Hermione supposed that she couldn't blame her for turning tail, but she also could use a friend and it wasn't as if she could go to Neville with this one. She doubted he would be pleased that his boyfriend was going to be a dad.
"Not especially." Hermione whispered, unable to make her voice any louder just then. "Still trying to wrap my head around it all…" She hoped that that would be enough to tell Ginny that she was right about the pregnancy without Hermione actually needing to say the words themselves.
Ginny gave her upper arm a short squeeze before she sat down beside her. Her eyes met Hermione's and Hermione couldn't help but notice that they were without their usual fire. She tried not to let herself believe that the look that her friend was giving her was pity, but it just wasn't that easy.
"Have you spoken to-?"
"No." Hermione cut her off before she had the chance to finish that particular question. She didn't want to hear it. She knew that she needed to talk to so many people and she just couldn't make herself do it. She knew that that made her a terrible person at the end of it all, but she didn't care. Or at least she was going to pretend that she didn't care. "I'm going to, but I haven't."
Ginny swallowed thickly but gave a short nod at that. She fell silent and dropped her gaze. Hermione knew that this wasn't exactly fair on the girl, not when she was being asked to keep secrets from not one but three of her brothers, but Hermione just needed a little bit longer to wrap her head around this one.
"I'm sorry." She said quietly before she picked up her plate and took it over to the sink where she deposited it into the sink. She didn't exactly know where she was going to go now, considering that if she went upstairs, she would only be going to Ginny's room and that would continue to make the girl feel awkward no doubt. Heading through to the living room didn't seem like a good idea either, there she would have to face Mrs Weasley and potentially Ron. Fred had at least been scared off by her.
"Mione..?" Ginny's voice snapped Hermione out of her thoughts and she quickly wiped away the tears that she had started to cry at some point. "It'll be okay, you know?"
"Will it?" Hermione wasn't being sarcastic, she genuinely wanted to know how this would be okay. She couldn't see how at that moment in time. She knew, had known from the moment that the potion had turned red, that she was going to be keeping her baby, but that didn't mean that it was going to be smooth sailing from here on out. She was likely to lose both the men that held her heart over this, and Ron…
Ginny's arms were wrapped around her tightly in the next moment. "Of course it will. No matter what, you have me and you have Harry."
"Everything okay in here..?" Hermione didn't need to look round to see who had just walked into the kitchen. She knew it was Ron and that was why a sob shuddered out of her without her consent. "I'll… I'll take that as a no…"
"Maybe you should talk to him." Ginny whispered, but Hermione knew that she was loud enough that Ron would have heard her and she knew now that there was no getting out of it
"Talk to me..?" Ron asked hesitantly as Hermione pulled away enough from Ginny so that she could glance over in his direction. There wasn't much point in drawing it out, she supposed. The sooner she talked to him about the baby, the better, and the sooner she could figure out how she was going to tell Fred and George.
"Yeah. Can we - um - will you come for a walk with me?" She asked slowly. She knew that it was dark outside already but talking to him inside the house where she could easily be judged by anyone and everyone who might overhear didn't seem like a good idea either. She knew that Mrs Weasley would have told her husband by now, and that her other children were not currently home, at least not to Hermione's knowledge, but that didn't change the way that it made her nervous.
Ron looked between his sister and Hermione before he gave a short nod. "Sure.." He agreed hesitantly, but that was all the answer that Hermione needed. She pressed a kiss to Ginny's cheek before she pulled away and made to grab her jacket from the hallway.
Ron followed her, keeping his distance and she supposed it was quite rightly so. He had no idea what she wanted to talk about and he was probably assuming the worst - something that Hermione hoped would help him feel some sort of relief when she told him her news, their news.
They walked for a while, Hermione's arms wrapped around herself as she tried to warm up. She hated how cold it was now, but then she supposed that was to be expected now that the nights were actually dark.
Once they were far enough away from the house that she felt that she could relax and actually talk to him without throwing up, or at least she hoped that she wouldn't throw up, she turned to face him. That treacle tart had been far too nice to waste.
"What's going on?" Ron asked when Hermione didn't say anything straight away. Hermione couldn't help but be glad that he hadn't just assumed that she wanted to get back together with him. "You're starting to scare me a little, you know that?"
"I don't mean to scare you." She said softly. "But I won't lie, this is pretty serious. I… I went to see a healer yesterday and it turns out that…. I found out that I'm pregnant."
"What?" Ron's voice was close to a yelp now, his eyes widening as he looked her up and down. "You're kidding, right?"
Hermione swallowed thickly as she shook her head. "I wouldn't kid about anything like this." She said quietly as she dug her nails into her elbows, looking to ground herself so that she would be able to continue this conversation, one that she knew he was probably ready to clock out of already. "The healer reckons I'm about ten weeks along…"
"It's mine?" Ron's eyes were still wide and he had gone so pale white that he could have easily swapped places with the ghoul in the attic and no-one would have asked questions.
"Of course it is." She tried not to be hurt that he could even think that the baby could be anyone else's. She hadn't been the one sleeping with someone else, but she decided not to bring that up; it wasn't the time to play the blame game, not when she just needed him to listen to her. "It's your baby and I'm going to keep it. I'm not asking anything from you, I just wanted you to know so that you can decide what you want. I… I better come clean about who I've been seeing as well while we're here, though honestly there's a chance that they won't want anything to do with me now that I'm pregnant…" She trailed off and took a deep breath before she continued. "I've been seeing Fred and George, though poor George had to put up with a really crappy date on Sunday…"
"Poor George..?" Ron repeated. Hermione wasn't sure if he was going to pass out or if he was okay. He was definitely a lot paler despite how cold it was out there and the pink tinge that her own cheeks had taken on. "How...what?" He rubbed his hands down over his face before he shook his head repeatedly. "This has to be the cruelest prank that they've ever played."
"This isn't a prank, Ron." Hermione said quietly. She tried not to get annoyed about it, allowing him to process the way that he needed to. "I know it sounds like I made the whole thing up, but you can ask your mum."
"Mum knows? Merlin…" Ron groaned. "How do you… how do you know it's mine?" He seemed to second guess the question in the middle so that was the only reason that Hermione didn't blow up at him for asking again. She knew that mentioning his brothers would make him doubt it.
"Because I've only slept with you, besides Fred and George? That's a new thing." She answered him as calmly as possible. "Listen, take some time to wrap your head around all of this. I know that I still am and like I said, I don't expect anything from you. I just thought that you should know, and if you choose to be involved… well that's your choice."
Ron fidgeted, his hands buried inside of his pockets and his eyes fixed on her in a way that made her uncomfortable, but she decided not to mention it. She knew that he was most likely in shock.
"Thanks - thanks for telling me." Ron managed to get out as he finally blinked. "If you… If you need anything, let me know.." He didn't sound certain that she should go to him, but she appreciated the sentiment anyway.
"Thanks, Ron." She said quietly. "I'm gonna head back in before my fingers drop off. Do you… are you going to be okay?"
"Aren't I meant to ask you that?" He looked tense, which Hermione could understand, especially when this was the longest conversation that the two of them had had since they had broken up.
"I don't think there are any right or wrongs here." Hermione gave him a small smile. "I'll see you later." She said quietly before she turned and headed back towards the house. She did feel a sense of relief as she walked back into the Burrow. One less person to tell, and even if Ron didn't want his baby, at least he had the choice now and it wasn't all on Hermione to make the decision for him.