Work Text:
There's so much work to do to keep the academy up and running, but Luke is edgy and restless and the bright autumn afternoon is too nice to be cooped up in his office and its mountains of paperwork. So he takes the Xwing for a spin up the mountainside with the windows rolled down, driving for the sake of the steering wheel in his hands, the car a metallic extension of his body, instead of trying to get somewhere.
He can't stop thinking about Mara the entire time.
Luke keeps a chalkboard outside his door for the students to leave scrawled messages when he's not in his office. Late last night--or possibly early this morning--Mara scrawled, in her distinctive looping hand, Be back when I feel like it.
Luke doesn't question her departures, but he wishes he understood the reasons behind them. Maybe it's the same restlessness that draws him out of the office and on the back roads up the mountain--except that Mara's sphere is the whole world, not just this tiny corner of the southern Appalachians
If we are going to dance together, set the rhythm and I'll follow, he wishes he could tell her. I don't care if it's a tango, foxtrot, contra, or even a waltz as long as I know the rules.
Luke doesn't do so well living alone. It's not that he doesn't appreciate having his own space, it's just... lonely without anyone there to share it with him. Meanwhile, Mara has always been a loner--an only child with few friends, raised by an impossibly rich and definitely abusive grandfather. Is that why sparks fly whenever she and Luke are together? Is that why they fit so well, despite all their differences?
Is that why she keeps pulling away?
***
Luke grew up in the middle of nowhere, in a literal desert, so of course he's never seen the ocean before. Ever the fashionable California girl, Leia insists on taking him out along the boardwalk overlooking the Pacific Ocean for the first time. They walk for hours, as Luke stares, entranced by the gleaming water and the press of people, doing his best to take everything in. Every subsequent visit goes exactly the same way: he can't stop staring, even Han rolls his eyes and mutters something about tourists under his breath.
Being with Mara is like encountering the sea all over again.
Luke is happy to give her all the space she needs, whatever it takes to make her happy. He learned the hard way with Callista that love requires letting go, and that small good-byes are often necessary to prevent dramatic big ones. Still, even trusting Mara as he does, he can't lose sight of the fear that maybe this time, she won't come back.
***
He stops for gas in Yavin, a sleepy little town on the edge of the national forest that still has diagonal parking along the old-fashioned main street. He orders a mug of hot chocolate from the local greasy spoon and settles in at a table by the window to consume his order.
Thus fortified, he wanders up and down the street, taking in what sights are to be had in this place. Yavin is struggling to get by, and has seen better days, but there are a handful of shops open, geared towards summer visitors.
As Luke walks, he plays games in his mind, imagining Mara's reaction to the faux reptile boots at the shoe store, or how the leather coat in the upscale boutique would fit snugly against her shoulders. His eyes linger the longest over a silver necklace set with green stones to match her eyes at the jeweler's--ostensibly emerald, but more likely hiddenite or even colored artificial diamond at that price.
An imaginary Mara isn't as good as the real thing, but it will have to do until she comes back.
***
"Why are you always watching me?" Mara demands, pacing back and forth across the bedroom, as Luke stares on in confusion.
"I'll never get tired of looking at you," he says, because it's true.
Mara grimaces in obvious discomfort and Luke curses himself for a fool. He'd forgotten how open declarations of affection spook her.When he wakes the next morning, he is unsurprised to find her gone again.
At least she leaves a note for him this time.
***
When Luke returns to his parking spot, Mara is leaning back in the driver's seat of the Xwing, scrolling idly through her phone. "Wondered when you'd get back," she says, sliding into the passenger's seat with a cheeky grin as he opens the car door.
"Would have been sooner if I'd known you were waiting for me," Luke says.
She shrugs. "I hitchhiked into town this morning. Seemed like a good day for it. You know how it is."
"I couldn't sit in the office, either," Luke agrees. "What would you have done if I hadn't turned up?"
"Hitchhiked back to the academy. Or maybe somewhere else if my ride was up for it."
"How about going home with me?"
"That's okay, too."
She closes her eyes as he puts the Xwing in gear and backs out of the parking space and is asleep by the time he's crossed the city limits. Luke envies her ability to catnap at the slightest opportunity.
The steering wheel is still warm from her touch. When he lifts a hand up to his face, he can smell her perfume, and he inhales deeply, savoring the familiar scent.
Luke smiles and keeps on driving.