Chapter Text
Every beginning has its end, and this story came to an end a very long time ago. Do you remember? It was seven years ago when Emil and Leon lost contact with each other. They had tried their hardest to call everyday, to meet up and have lunch, but school and family swallowed their time up. Emil’s family expanded with the goodbye of Tino and Berwald from the apartment, and Leon’s major took up all of the time he had. Leon hadn’t been sure how he would survive the few years without the love of his life. Until he met Genna. And Anna. And Karoline.. And so on. After seeing so many girls in his first year of college, it was almost as if Emil was pushed to the back of his mind, forever forgotten…
Oh how the time passes. 1998 seems like a very long time ago now, a date in the distant past. The year is 2006, and the city of Oslo Norway hasn’t changed as much as Leon had thought it would. He was coming home for the holidays this year, after having avoided it for so long. Honestly, he couldn’t remember what was so special about it to him as a teenager. He couldn’t help thinking that there was something he was forgetting, but shrugged it off as leaving something back at his apartment.
Leon would be an idiot if he couldn’t remember the way to the house he spent most of his childhood in. Pulling up to his house seemed like bliss. It was so much bigger than he had remembered. Compared to his cramped studio apartment he was living in while he finished up medical school it was practically a castle. Leon took a deep breath as he put his car in park and pushed up his glasses, looking up at the quick knock on his window. Leon looked over and was met with the smiling face of his older brother, Im Yong, and got out of his car. He was immediately met with a big tight hug, and all the air was knocked out of him. Seeing his brother was amazing, but he sort of wanted to breathe more than anything.
When Leon was finally released, he was led inside, where good scents surrounded him as well as family. He found that they were all doing pretty swell as adults so far. His brother Kiku had finished his art course and was currently employed at a graphic design company, and even seeing a lovely girl, though she decided to spend Christmas with her own family. His sister’s were living together and running a real estate business, which was getting them pretty far in life. His brother Anurak finished veterinary school, and worked at the local zoo. Kahna was still working on getting a degree, though he wouldn’t say what for. It convinced Leon that Kanha was just living off of selling shit out of the back of his car. And of course his father. Yao had a few more gray hairs than before, but that was to be expected. Leon gave him a big hug and made up the excuse of school for not coming and visiting sooner.
Leon was glad that at least a few people were glad to see him. He hadn’t brought up the best relationships with his classmates or his professors, and somehow he had lost every contact from high school he had. So it was just him, alone in his apartment. Could he even call it an apartment so much as a bedroom?A glorified bedroom. But Leon wasn’t too concerned. Once he finished school he could get a job, and then he could get a real apartment. That was all that mattered to him, finishing school. Yeah, it only takes four years to complete, but Leon had a rough start. First he actually decided to get his PHD, then he decided halfway through that wasn’t for him as it took seven years. Now he was in his last years of medical school, and he was very glad for that.
The night went by smoothly, and Leon enjoyed being with his family. They all at their dinner, and laughed, told stories about the past years that the others had missed out on. It was highly enjoyable for them all, and especially Leon. He didn’t get much entertainment now-a-days with how stressed he was. Everything fun seemed miles away with how much work he had to do. But it all changed the moment they turned the television on.
Leon was just sipping a cup of tea when Kanha let out a whistle. “Man, she’s gotta be the hottest girl alive!” He said, which received him a punch in the shoulder from Anurak. “I’m serious! Look at her! Long blonde hair, bright blue eyes! That’s an angel! A goddess!” Leon gave a small laugh. Yeah, she was pretty attractive, wasn’t she? Leon had to admit she was definitely well proportioned. And it almost seemed as though she was the most perfect thing she had ever seen.
“Yeah but her husband is a model!” Xiao Mei pointed out. “He’s the hottest guy alive! Though he’s always looked familiar to me somehow!” She said and leaned back in her seat. Leon tilted his head but brushed it off to her seeing some dude on the street someday that looked like a model. But now he was a bit curious. Who was this guy? What made him so attractive? “What does he look like?” Leon asked his little sister. She perked up and smiled. That’s when she pointed to the TV. “Oh oh! Look they’re on the news! They did a movie premier for her last night!”
Leon turned his attention over to the TV screen as Xiao Mei paused it on a picture of the actress and her model husband. Leon’s cup fell to the ground, tea pooling on the nice rug underneath the coffee table. Yao yelled at Leon for a minute before noticing how upset he looked. Xiao Mei turned her attention to Leon, then back to the TV a few times. Kiku cleared his throat nervously and bit his lip, now understanding the situation. That’s when it finally clicked for Xiao Mei, after examining his picture on the screen she let out a loud gasp. “Wait a minute! That's him! That’s Emil! Why did you never tell us he was a model! Wait, does this mean you two broke up?! How did I not realize that was him sooner, I’ve heard his name everywhere! Emil Stielsson!”
Leon couldn’t even stand to hear the name without feeling guilty. He stood up quickly and let out a sigh. “I'll go grab some rags to clean this up..” He muttered before quickly leaving the room.
Leon couldn’t believe it. After those seven years, he had lost himself a model, someone considered to be one of the most attractive men in the country. The world! It seemed like a fever dream, and suddenly Leon felt like he was going to cry. He remembered. That had been his life, his future. The man he wanted to run away with, the man he wanted to marry, to wake up to every day. But no. Instead, Leon was living in a glorified bedroom with hardly any money for food after gas expenses, hardly able to keep himself warm because he didn’t want to pay to keep a heater plugged in, trying to finish school for a career he hardly wanted in the first place. And when he looked at Emil’s face, that smile, the way he had cut his hair a little bit shorter than before…. It made Leon jealous, and his heart hurt. He felt horrible that he ignored all of those calls, those invites on dates. Everything he had ever done wrong flooded his mind. But his father had been right. This would have only lasted if it was a movie. Nothing ever stayed. This was Leon’s first time actually feeling heartbroken. He wondered if this was how Emil felt when he broke up with him. In fact, after they started to love each other, even after they ran away, they never officially started dating again. So were they even meant to be in the first place? It made him wonder if Emil had even loved him in the first place…
Leon was taken away from his thoughts by a tap on his shoulder. It was only then that he realised there were tears falling down his cheeks. He looked over at Kiku and then wiped his eyes. “Sorry, I’m taking pretty long, huh?” He asked as he took off his glasses to better wipe his eyes. Leon had never been one to cry, even in front of his family, but this was his breaking point.
Kiku frowned and put a hand on his brother's shoulder. “I get it. It’s upsetting, right? I felt the same way when I found out Alfred was married. Even if we broke up when we were seventeen, it still felt like I had been stabbed in the heart. That’s how you feel, right?” Leon nodded. But that wasn’t the end of what he felt.
“Yeah, but you and Alfred left things in a good place. You two were happy and content with the fact you would never have to hide away and feel the thrill. Emil and I.. we stopped talking after a while and neither of us ever put in an effort to try and pick it back up…” Leon told. This wasn’t Like Kiku and Alfred, they were still friends even. This was just a classic quick relationship story, that ended with them never speaking to or seeing each other again.
After a few minutes of silence, Leon got over himself. He didn’t need to be acting like this. He grabbed the rags off of the counter and went back to the living room. Leon handed the rags to ao, who scoffed and said, “Took you long enough! This better not have left a stain!” But Leon was hardly listening. How could he when he just found out the person he thought he would die with was married to an actress and having his picture taken shirtless for magazines? Leon considered getting a hold of one of those magazines to be honest…
Leon’s room was almost exactly how he had left it when he moved away, minus a couple of things he brought with him. His ed was still here, and most of his things. The skateboard rack was still on the wall, with a few of his old boards on it. He hadn’t needed to bring them, and he had sold a few for extra cash. But it still reeked of teenage rebellion. He missed those days.
After getting snug in his bed, Leon took out his laptop and decided to do some research. When had Emil become a model? 2000. Only six years ago? That seemed like so little, and yet it was only two years after the incident. When had Emil gotten married? 2002. That also seemed like such a little amount of time compared to the current year, only happening four years ago. Leon was a little jealous. The pictures from Emil’s wedding were fabulous, and obviously expensive. He wondered just how long that girl had been acting for? Emil hadn’t been modeling for very long, but maybe Leon underestimated how much money models make.
And once Leon was done wallowing, he decided to get some rest. He felt so at home in these sheets. He remembered all of the times Emil spent in this bed with him before they had to run off to college. The two of them had decided to live it up while they still could in those last few months. He remembered it like it as yesterday now that the memories were fresh in his brain…
”Leon, are you sure this is a good idea.. your brother may change his mind about staying with his friend..” Emil said nervously as he piled his lips away from Leon. The brunette chuckled softly and shook his head, then continued to place kisses on Emily’s lips. Once that got boring, he moved down and started to suck on the blonde’s neck, causing a lovely little reaction from Emil. “Ok, ok… I’ll keep my mouth shut…”
Waking up the next morning, Leon was groggy. Someone was shaking him awake and whispering to him to get up. Leon matched the voice to his wonderful sister Xiao Mei, opening his eyes a crack to glare at her. “Come on! I want to go do some extra Christmas shopping!”
Leon wasn’t too sure about her offer, but he groaned and shoved his glasses on, getting out of bed so he could dress himself. A quick glance out the window revealed a snowy ground, how wonderful. Leon didn’t even like to drive in the snow, and he did it fairly regularly. But today was no different for him than any other. It just showed him that the rest of his family was doing much better than him at the moment. In fact, leon hadn’t even gotten any of his family members gifts this year due to his lack of moolah. But maybe Xiao Mei knew this. Maybe that’s why she invited him along. He didn’t want her charity, at least he usually wouldn’t want it, but this was a desperate measure.
When Leon got into the car, his sister turned on the radio. He heard the sweet sound of a voice, and Xiao Mei practically melted into her seat. “Man, their voices are beautiful together! Have you ever heard them?! Andreplass, that’s their ‘Band’ name! They aren’t really a band, the two of them and all! They’re husbands who went from nothing to everything in the span of a year! A man found them singing together in the main square one day raising money for further research on their friend’s illness! Isn’t that amazing?!” Leon rolled his eyes. What was so exciting? They were a couple of gay guys who were way better off than leon, and they go their fame through a guitar and a couple dollars? How embarrassing..
The city was vibrant and full of life. Leon had forgotten how much he hated being out in public, mostly because he hadn’t bought clothing in such a long time. They were all tattered, he looked like a hobo. But what broke college student didn’t?
Xiao Mei led her brother through every shop, helping him pick out clothes he liked. He knew what she was doing. She was seeing his size, what sort of clothing he liked, and then coming back later while he was home to buy them, or getting them while he was sulking in a different store. This happened last year, and the year before that too. Yeah, he knew her little game at this point. Leon didn’t want anything like that from her, so he looked at a few things, especially when she wasn’t looking. Then she did what he was more expecting. She offered to help him out buying a Christmas present for their father. Leon also knew that she hadn’t a clue what to get Yao, and if they bought something “Together” then she could get out of trying to figure it out on her own. Luckily, it was only Yao, so Leon didn’t have to get anything for his other siblings. But with all of the help he was getting from his sister, he managed to sneak off and get her a nice diamond necklace. Wasn’t like she didn’t already have a million of them, but that wasn’t as special as her wonderful brother getting her one.
By noon, Leon was more than ready to go home. In fact he voiced this to his sister quite a few times. “Leon stop complaining! We hardly get to see each other anymore, just another hour!” She whined.
“But I wanna go home! It’s cold, my feet hurt, I wanna bother dad, I wanna steal his baking supplies and throw it in the koi pond!” Leon whined back at her. She let out a small laugh and shook her head. They decided to finish up in this store and then finish off the day by going and getting some lunch together. Leon couldn’t refuse free food, he was a broke college student! Even more broke now that he’s bought that necklace...
After Xiao Mei finished up paying for another blouse she definitely didn’t need and would get tired of in a week and forget about in her closet until spring cleaning, they made their way to a nice little place by the water. They sat inside, as the patio was closed due to the snow. Leon had to admit, if it wasn’t for his sister, he would have never in his life been able to eat here. It looked like they served gold bars covered in diamond shavings here. It disgusted Leon that people had the money to waste on food you could buy in the grocery store for half the price, but it was their bankruptcy not his. If they wanted to spend two hundred dollars on a piece of cauliflower then he wouldn’t stop them.
Xiao Mei noticed how silent her brother was. She set her menu down and frowned, letting out a tiny sigh. “Leon, I know it hurts that he’s moved on.. It would hurt me, too.. But you need to let this go.. Emil is happy! He’s married, probably has a pet!” Leon didn’t want to think of that. It made him wonder if Mr. Puffin was still alive, the cat he remembered used to wander around the apartment, and everything else. He remembered that so many things about that family had been strange, and yet it made him feel so calm to recall all of those times..
”It’s wonderful you haven’t gone mad yet..” Emil said with a small stifled laugh, avoiding being too loud, not wanting to wake the rest of his family. “Everyone here is, and yet you’ve kept your head screwed on so fucking tight..”
Leon turned a small shade of red as he shook his head. “With you, I don’t think I could ever..” He whispered softly, feeling a pair of lips hit his own. Gently Leon put his hand on the side of Emil’s face, and the two of them collapsed in silent laughs. “You know, maybe we are mad.. Look at us, laughing over thinking we’re mad..” Emil calmed himself and gave a quick nod of agreement. He thought they were just horribly sick in the head. That they were going to be sent to the looney house. But maybe that was just him. Emil thought a lot of strange things, and he thought them very often. “I just think that some people should stay out of our relationship sometimes, is that so much to ask for..?”
“‘Hvis alle passet på sin egen virksomhet, ville verden gå rundt en avtale raskere enn den gjør.’..” Emil purred. Though Leon, being not so fluent, let out a quick confused grunt. “It’s a quote from Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland.. ‘If everybody minded their own business, the world would go round a deal faster than it does.'.. That’s what your little angry speech reminded me of..” Emil joked, giving Leon a quick peck on the lips. The asian male just shrugged. He supposed that made a deal of sense.
Leon didn’t have much time to ponder over it that night, he was a bit distracted by sex, but he didn’t think he would forget that one..
And he hadn’t. Leon remembered it, word for word. He wanted to mind his own business. What he had said in that bedroom seven years ago made sense right now. Emil was married. There was nothing Leon could do to change that fact. He had to mind his own business and then the world would return to a normal pace, he would be able to focus on school. He could graduate, and even get married himself! He didn’t need bleach blonde hair, bright eyes. He just needed to focus on himself for now. He came home for a break from all of his stress, not to get more things piled up on his shoulders.
It was obvious that Leon had been thinking about this way longer than he thought, because what broke him from the memories was the voice of his waiter. “And what will you be having today, sir?” She asked. Leon jumped a bit, quickly canning over the menu. “Oh, uhm, just the shrimp salad, I’m not all that hungry at the moment…” Leon muttered, clearing his throat as he handed the waitress his menu, watching her walk away. Xiao Mei hiffed and rolled her eyes.
“Earth to Leon! Is there something wrong? Are you angry with Emil for getting married? You two were never even really dating! You just had sex three times a week and then did your homework while cuddling up! Maybe you thought that would lead you to marriage, but it won’t! Leon, you’re twenty-five, I think it’s about time you forgot about what you had back in high school! You two used to be very very close! And it should only hurt to lose him right after it happens, not years and years later! Am I getting through to you? Please just let me get through to you about this..” Xiao Mei was practically begging, and Leon gave her a nod and a smile. “Oh thank the lord..” She sighed out.
But she didn’t get through to him. Leon still wanted everything to do with Emil. He missed waking up to see pale white skin facing him, and feel soft blonde hair on his chest. The moment he had seen Emil’s picture on the television was the moment he relised all of that.
After they ate, Leon and Xiao mei went back home, where things were calm and quiet. When they walked inside, everyone was crowded around the TV. Leon walked over to see the news on, making him wonder what was so great. He glanced over all of them to see a big event seemingly going on, with news people everywhere. Leon hardly noticed any of the people, and he took a seat. He wondered what was so important. That’s when he realised it wasn’t just a big event. There were news reporters and crowds of people. All in front of a hospital. Xiao Mei settled herself onto the couch as the reporter talked about something or other. Leon wasn’t paying attention to the screen, more or less trying to distract himself from his sadness. But his eyes snapped to the screen the moment he heard the name being said. “Singer Mathias Khøler, and his husband, Lukas Khøler, are currently in the hospital. Mathias is sustaining a stable condition, after suffering from fourth degree burns as he walked right into one of the flamethrowers on the stage. Lukas has a broken wrist after tripping over a small ledge, and will be released shortly. Tonight at their locol concert, video shows Mathias walking across the stage and catching a flame, and doctors say half of his torso, left arm, and the left half of his face are very burned up. He was taken to surgery to fix up some of the wounds, and has not woken up from the anesthetics yet. We’ll be here for that moment and report to you the moment he wakes.” Leon’s eyes went wide. Were those two the people on the radio earlier? How in the world did he not realize that sooner?!
“And just as we expected, Emil and Marcha Stielsson have arrived here, to support their family!” Leon walked a bit closer to look at the screen, seeing Emil’s troubled face. He had always looked so small when he was upset. The way he ran through the snow, not even wearing his shoes, which were placed in his hands as his wife complained about him walking too fast, because she was afraid her heels would make her slip. Leon wanted to be there, to tell Emil that he was going to be just fine.
No. He couldn’t take it anymore. Leon turned away and went up the stairs. No matter how much he thought those people hated him, he knew he had been an added part of the family in that year he had been around them before college. Leon knew they had considered him a part of their little mixed up family. How? They invited him on vacations, to dinner, and would persist on him being there. But there was the question of how Leon was supposed to get into the hospital and past police officers and bodygaurds and doctors. And then it hit him.
Leon shut his bedroom door and ran up onto his loft, digging under his bed for a moment until he pulled out a tattered cardboard box. He grabbed a handful of photos out of the box, polaroids, all with he and Emil, and the other members of the apartment. Celebrating Emil’s birthday, going to beaches, random pictures the two of them took in bed, only blankets covering things people wouldn’t want to see. Leon was sure this would be able to help him pass the people and get in pretty easily.
Leon grabbed a satchel from under his bed and loaded in the photos, slinging it onto his shoulder and finally going downstairs again. “I’m going out for a drink..” he said angrily, slamming the door behind him. It may have been a lie, but he really did want a drink. He needed a big glass of whiskey to drown his emotions away. It sounded like a good idea. But Leon needed to drive and convince the guards to let him pass. Why did famous people need guards? You could just teach them karate. In fact, Leon decided he should write down that idea later, or tell someone about it.
The entire drive there, Leon had the chills. He drove slowly, yet every so often he would speed up and stop his elf when he realised. He didn’t want to get arrested or anything. In fact, crashing his car and getting placed on the same floor would be a smart idea but Leon wasn’t in the mood to persuade his father to pay for that. Besides getting hurt just to see an ex? That could kill him if he wasn’t careful.
Leon arrived at the hospital and pulled in, walking right into the building as if it was no big deal. He was good at walking into places and blending in. In fact this felt normal to him. But now he needed to get the room number. That was the hard part. It was obvious that they wouldn’t just hand over the number to someone random. And they may think the photos are fake after a moment. But it was a risk that Leon was willing to take! He needed to see Emil again, even if he was angry. Even if Lukas was angry, Tino, Berwald, Mathias even. Leon didn’t care at all just what happened when he got there. He just needed to get there.
Leon walked up to the front desk, smiling softly. “Hello ma’am, I, uh, well you may not believe this, but I’m an old family friend of Emil Stielsson’s family. I’ve come to say hi, college has been keeping me busy but I suppose it’s time I came back.” Leon said, a straight face so he didn’t seem too nervous or overly happy and smiley. The receptionist rose a brow and leaned back. He was losing it. Leon sighed and opened his satchel and pulled out the photos. “Look, this is us when we were seventeen. Emil, there’s me, in this one here we all are at the beach. There’s me, Emil, Tino and Lukas.” The receptionist leaned forward, her eyes a bit wide. She cleared her throat and handed the photos back, smiling. “Floor four! Please enjoy your visit, and remember that visiting hours are closed at nine P.M!” She said. Leon gave her a small smile, waving halfly as he walked off to the elevator.
The elevator ride seemed like hours instead of a couple of minutes. He wondered how much Emil had changed, personality wise, really. He had seen Emil on the TV, his hair looked a little different, and from the look on his face from earlier, he looked a lot less anti social. It was strange, seeing Emil looking so… so, intense. Leon only remembered that sort of look in bed, when Emil topped. It didn’t happen often, but when he did? Damn that guy had been a monster. It made Leon chuckle to remember such things as that. But he sort of missed being in control of someone.
Finally, the elevator stopped, and the doors opened. There weren’t very many people up here and
Leon’s heart started to race. What was he doing? Why did he do this? Why did he even come here? It was obvious by the fact that Emil never tried to contact him that he wasn’t wanted. Emil would have called if he wanted Leon back. But instead? No, instead he was coming up uninvited. Emil would be utterly dissapointed. He would yell at Leon to leave, and to never come and see him again. That’s what Leon thought, at least.
Upon getting onto the floor, Leon relised, the receptionist never gave him the room number. So now he was going to wander around and look at the names on the doors, which had been messily written on whiteboards by the doors. And the moment Leon saw the last name of Mathias and now apparently Lukas, he took a deep breath and knocked softly. There was a small, “Come on in, doc” which immediately registered in Leon’s head as Mathias. He opened the door and gave a half smile, though he looked fairly nervous. Emil’s eyes went wide, and the others in the room looked just as shocked.
“Yeah, I’m not exactly a doctor, yet…” He muttered.