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Everything was over in an instant. Felix's hand was shaking in fear, desperately trying to leave while avoiding the flying objects coming his way. He was frightened, startled, scared with tears streaming down his eyes. "S-Stop!" He remembers calling out, holding out his arm as a sign of resistance only to cry in pain when the shattered piece of glass cut his arm drawing blood but at the time that didn't matter, Hyunjin did, his anger with him did, he didn't want what they had to end. But here they were, Felix cornered in his past lovers' house screaming for forgiveness, Hyunjin was angry at nothing, he'd come back after a night out with his dance team but had come back conflicted about his feelings. That was all Felix remembers, well, of course, there was more. That's a story for another day.
"Good morning mum," Felix muttered as he rubbed his eye, walking over to his mother planting a sweet peck to her forehead. Mrs Lee smiled up at her son. He was hurting after what he'd been through it hurt to see her son's arm wrapped in a bandage. She knew that her son had not only bandaged the external wound around his arm but his entire being, but he was hiding because of the man he had been in a three-year relationship with broke him inside.
She was outraged at Hyunjin for causing her son to close himself, but the kind eyes Felix gave her, shaking his head managed to extinguish any sort of anger within her. "Morning dear, are you headed out to university?" She asked, receiving a nod from her son who waved a bit and walked out the door without looking back.
Hwang Hyunjin, faltered as he rubbed his head in pain. Was he hungover? What happened? He sighed into his bed groaning from the intense discomfort he felt coursing through his body. He didn't remember what he did but he wasn't ready to see his room living room trashed with blood splatters on his wall. Shit. Shit. Shit, Felix. The colour on Hyunjin's face drained calling out for the younger male in desperation before he stopped in the middle of the room after he has stepped on a silver necklace. His heart broke at the sight, it was the very necklace he had gifted Felix on their second anniversary. Tears started to build up in his eyes, what had he done? He clasped the broken necklace, staring at the blood on the wall. "Did I...hurt him?" He asked himself not wanting to believe that he had broken off a healthy relationship.
Winds were blowing against the taller male, running towards Felix's university in full speed knowing very well that the younger deserved an explanation and apology. Hyunjin's face was burning with tears flowing down his cheeks mixed with both sadness and anger. He soon reached the university, looking around frantically for Felix, spotting the younger's soft pink hair bouncing in the distance, he tried calling out to him but stopped when he noticed Felix's arm wrapped in a cast, his heart dropped. He was the reason the younger had a physical injury but soon time stopped when Felix and Hyunjin locked eyes.
Everything around them halted the noises of students, screaming, laughter, everything. It was just them, Felix stared at Hyunjin with fear in his eyes, pure terrifying fear replayed in slow motion through the older's mind. God , he hated it but knew that if Felix's anger died down, he would have a chance to apologize, he didn't want this. Everything that happened then was for that moment, he loved Felix, he never wanted this to occur. He slowly reached out to Felix, taking a step forward as Felix's stare burned his very living. It broke him, he couldn't hear anything at that moment, his eyes fixated on Felix and Felix alone. Well, not until he felt himself being pushed back, blood-curdling screams erupting right after.
Everything was over in an instant. Felix's limp body covered in a pool of his bright red blood, eyeing him straight in the eye, seconds to pass out from the pain. Felix just sacrificed himself for someone who let him spill blood for his useless existence a second time. Felix's friends screamed at the sight, Seungmin and Jisung running to the boy calling out for help against the multiple gasps of horror that emitted around the front gate of the university. Hyunjin was on the pavement staring at him in terror. "L-Li...Lix.." He muttered, the energy of his muscles dying out on him. He covered his eyes, trying to cancel the noises out. He noticed his angry friends looking right at him before he felt himself rising to his feet involuntarily. "How dare you show yourself here? How dare you have the fucking nerve to come here after what you did to him!?" He looked up to meet one of Felix's closest friends, Bangchan staring at him with burning eyes. He shoved him aside and threateningly curled his fingers to make a fist, causing his knuckles to grow white. "Leave. LEAVE THIS INSTANT, NEVER SHOW YOUR FACE HERE AGAIN!"
Hyunjin threw the vase at the wall Felix had supposedly taken cover for, the glass shattering right next to the male. Multiple shards sticking onto the younger's arm. "J-Jinnie no..calm down, please...you're drunk. Don't do this.." Hyunjin heard the voice play over and over in his head, the intoxicated self coming out the front, picking up a glass shard, he yanked Felix towards him, forcefully ripping out the latter arm, pressing the glass onto his pale soft skin, ignorant of the fearful pleads from the younger, his squirms meant nothing, Hyunjin's half-open eyes started to write on his arm, letters of a name. Seo Changbin. Felix's screams overpowered his pain, blood leaking out of his arms, the loss of blood almost knocking the younger out. "I- I love Changbin more than you Felix. You're annoying, you don't know Korean well, after so many fucking years you don't know how to speak properly, God you're such a mess, having dealt with you for these years, it's been a pain. You hear me, a PAIN. Leave. LEAVE THIS INSTANT!! NEVER SHOW YOUR FACE HERE EVER AGAIN."
Bangchan punched him, with everything he had. He was crying in anger but soon pushed the taller aside with a click of his tongue. "You deserve so much more, for leading him on while you were busy looking at someone else from your team. Are you happy now? with your bloody Seo Changbin, w-with your life? Having already destroyed his? He did nothing wrong!, only dating you...what was I thinking allowing him to date you Hwang? You disgust me." Chan spat as he walked to his friends who had called an ambulance by that time, trying his best to comfort the younger ones wailing their hearts out. 'I never wanted it...' Hyunjin thought, getting up wobbly as he left the scene, looking back at Felix's partly lifeless eyes.
Time around Hyunjin began to become slower, his daily movements grew stale, merely pacing back and forth without the absence of his sunshine. Two days had passed after Felix's accident and he didn't know what to do, should he report himself to the police for abuse? Sure that sufficed as a fitting punishment but something in his mind kept ringing, Felix's words kept ringing in his ears. Hyunjin stopped in his tracks, looking back to see the emptiness of his room, where once Felix used to stand smiling cutely at him in his long baggy sweater and boxers. He gasped, realizing that he has lost Felix for good, not only had he abused the younger, he had allowed him to save his life even if they had nothing left. Hyunjin was a monster .
Five days had passed now, Hyunjin was on his couch slouched over with a dead look on his face, he snickered to himself staring at the dried blood on the wall, regretting every inch of his existence. He didn't want to be here, at least that is what he promised himself. He said that he would leave only if Felix goes first, was he going mad? Positively yes. Was he going to do anything about his lack of self-care? No. Hyunjin was a mess, countless bottles of alcohol scattered everywhere, blades on the floor, tissues crumpled and thrown across the floor. He hadn't bothered to clean up or clean himself up. "Lix...come back."
Day 10 and Hwang Hyunjin was found bleeding out in the washroom of his apartment, deep and horrid cuts around his arms. The words 'I'm sorry' written in blood on the walls. The one who had found him was Felix's mother who had come to see Hyunjin on her son's request. She was horrified at his state, immediately called an ambulance. She realized that Hyunjin didn't mean to break Felix the day he did after all and it hurt her, beyond imagination. "My son knew it...he asked me to check on you. No matter who hurts him, he will always forgive them." She said, eyeing Hyunjin who had his eyes tightly shut, what Mrs Lee didn't know was that Hyunjin heard her, his consciousness catching what she'd said before he passed out while on the stretcher.
The walls were white, the smell of medicine stuffing Hyunjin's nose, he fluttered his eyes open to be met with white colour all around, moving around some more, he noticed the drips next to him, sighing. "I was saved." He muttered before closing his eyes softly, opening it up to a familiar pink fluff of hair next to him. His heartbeat raised, words caught in between his throat but he couldn't stop staring at the person in front of him. Felix was there, looking at him with kind eyes but filled with sadness. "You're an idiot Hwang Hyunjin." He muttered, slowly and hesitant. He grabbed his hand and gulped. "I-I know you didn't mean...e-everything you said. I'm not...I'm not mad at you." Felix added and held his arm out.
Hyunjin gasped lowly seeing the scratches of the name on Felix's arm. He choked out a sorry before he felt Felix leaning down with his arms wrapped around him. He was crying too, they missed each other. The nurses smiled at the two, leaving them alone. Of course, the boys hadn't noticed they were being watched by the staff, they were too invested crying against each other for old times sake. "I missed you. I'm sorry, I-I shouldn't have done anything to you. God, I don't deserve you Lix.." Hyunjin sputtered out, instantly calming down when Felix planted pepper kisses on his face. "Shut up already. I'm okay...I just need to be careful and make sure you pay attention to the roads so that I don't have to push you out of the way again." Felix admitted, guilt rushing in through Hyunjin. "I'm so--" "Stoooppp! I get it you're forgiven."
Just like that, their time in the hospital came to a close and they spoke about continuing their relationship. Felix didn't look completely ready while they addressed the situation but at the same time, he wasn't ready to break off what they had. Of course, Hyunjin whined at first, slowly realizing that he shouldn't pressurize the latter. "We should start things over, Lix." Hyunjin piped up to which Felix gaped at him . "Start over? As in, how we did three years ago?" He asked receiving a nod. "It's the only way to mend what we lost, isn't it? All I'm saying is don't leave me..I'll break if you do and I can't be without someone I cherish." Felix cooed hearing Hyunjin's words and decided this was a perfect time to tell him.
"I mentioned it before but I suppose you forgot Hyunjinnie, I will never abandon you no matter what you do to me. Of course, abuse isn't an option anymore, drinking isn't either. No spending time out with your friends after a certain curfew, absolutely no alcohol! You're giving me the items you used to injure yourself, you're going to take care of yourself and we're going to be happy and---" Hyunjin stared endearingly at Felix ranting on do's and dont's. Oh boy, this was just the beginning of re-establishing their relationship.
What started as a major mistake ended up growing stronger over time, Hwang Hyunjin and Lee Felix did re-establish their relationship, going as far as to keep lists and watch over each other so that they don't step over the line. Never does Hyunjin want Felix to have the title of 'EX' ever again.
"Channie told me he slapped you."
"Jesus!! do not bring that up again, it hurt."
"You deserved it, loser."