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"So you really got one too...What are the odds?" Himiko could hear the undertone of nervousness in her own voice as she said it. She could only hope it was less obvious to Korekiyo. This was what they were both aiming for. It would be rude to seem disappointed by their success.
It was an utterly ordinary day, standing in sharp contrast to the news they received. She'd opened the window part way when she came in, letting in a pleasant late summer breeze. Sunlight streamed in too, a stripe of illumination stretching across the bed. The door was closed, but it was impossible to completely block out all the noise from outside, the hustle and bustle of doctors and nurses in the halls. The hospital wasn't a great place for privacy, but that too was a familiar routine.
The two letters sitting atop the blankets were not. Aside from the names, one being addressed to Yumeno Himiko and the other to Shinguuji Korekiyo, they were identical down to the Danganronpa emblem. On behalf of Team Danganronpa, I'm pleased to announce you've been selected as a participant for season 53. It said much more than just that, of course, but that was the sentence her eyes kept drifting to. It was the only one that mattered.
Sitting cross legged at the foot of the bed, she just stared down at the pages, hand smoothing out some of the creases in them. The date they'd have to report for pre-season preparations was just a few weeks away. The clock was already ticking.
"I know, right? Only 13 slots open to the general public this year, and we got two of them. I didn't think it was really possible." Kiyo was smiling when she peered up at them, a warm expression that seemed to light up their whole face.
"We'll get to become legends together, just like we wanted." She smiled back, unable to fully explain why the thought made her stomach hurt. "The whole country's gonna love us. Maybe even the world."
"My sister's going to be so jealous."
"That's a win all on its own. I'd pay to see her face when she finds out." That, at least, she meant wholeheartedly. She'd never met their sister, but from the stories she heard, the elder Shinguuji sibling was miserable to be around. She loved Danganronpa, and tried to audition more than once herself, only to get turned down each time. At 27, she'd long since aged out of eligibility, so seeing Korekiyo accomplish what she never could would surely hurt all the more.
"No need for payment," they replied, sweet smile taking on more of a mischievous edge. "I'll take pictures."
"Mm, how thoughtful of you. I'll be looking forward to it then." Himiko giggled, leaning a little closer. "I just hope she won't give you too much of a hard time. You can always stay with me if things at home get bad, you know. Remember that." They weren't always at home much anyway. With their fragile health, trips to the hospital were frequent enough that even Himiko had gotten used to it in the months since they met. Still, she wanted to make the offer. Her protective side hated thinking about the things they had to endure.
"Can I come over even if things don't get bad? If I just want someone to curl up next to at night?"
"Thoughtful and cute? I really did win the jackpot." Uncrossing her legs, she moved closer still, acceptance letters crinkling beneath her. Korekiyo was sitting back against the pillows, rumpled sheets pooling around their legs. She practically tipped herself into their lap, one hand coming to rest on their shoulder. The other gently cupped their face, thumb stroking over their cheekbone. "Yeah, you're welcome any time."
They still leaned into her touches so eagerly, even after all this time. Like she was offering them water in the desert. They were kindred spirits in that way, she supposed. She couldn't deny that she had the same reaction when they curled an arm around her waist. Her shirt had ridden up just a little, and the sensation of cold fingertips grazing her bare skin made her shiver even as she welcomed it.
"I'll keep that in mind," they said. "If my health cooperates."
"I'll fight your lungs if they don't behave," she offered jokingly, fingers still lightly stroking their cheek.
"Beating up my lungs might be a bit counterproductive if you're trying to get them to work." They pursed their lips in thought so seriously, loose strands of hair framing their face where it escaped the messy bun they'd put it up in. No makeup today, and the dark circles under their eyes stood out a little too much, suggesting they weren't sleeping well. They were beautiful as always though, sitting there with wrinkled pajamas and their mask pulled down.
"I dunno, it could be like how you can smack electronics to make them work sometimes."
"If I was going to allow anyone to manhandle my organs, it would certainly be you." They brushed a kiss over her lips, so quick she barely got a chance to enjoy it.
"Ooh, how romantic. As fitting as that would be for Danganronpa, I don't want to kill you." She made a face, imagining how unpleasant it would be to actually have a hand inside someone's rib cage. Yeah, no thanks. She'd pass.
"You don't? That's a shame. Well, the offer's still open if you change your mind." They weren't joking around anymore, and that was exactly why Himiko had been selfishly hoping they'd get rejected even after she opened her own letter that morning. It would hurt to know they were all alone, sitting here in the hospital and watching her on TV, but the thought of them in harm's way was so much worse. It didn't matter that the possibility had been looming over their relationship from the moment they met at auditions. She didn't really think it would happen.
"Mine is too, from back then," she said softly, gazing into their eyes in search of recognition. After a moment, she found it — a spark of remembrance. They just smiled though, holding her a little closer. Close enough that she couldn't meet their eyes without straining her neck, which was clearly Korekiyo's intention. She gave in, adjusting her arms and pressing her face into their shoulder instead.
"Hey, Shinguuji? This is gonna sound a little crazy, since we don't even really know each other, but let's stay in touch. Then if neither of us get in...we can run away together. It's not the same as going out in a blaze of glory, but it's gotta be better than just going on like this, right?" She picked at a rip in her jeans, already bracing herself for rejection as she waited for an answer. As well as they'd been getting along, this was still someone she only met a couple hours ago. What meaning did chatting in a crowded, noisy convention center really have, sitting on the grimy floor and commiserating as they waited their turns to audition?
"I couldn't," they said, expression pained even through their mask. "It's nothing against you, Yumeno-san. I can already tell I'd love to run away with you, have all sorts of adventures..." They rested a gentle hand over hers on her knee, its weight warm and reassuring. "It's just...my health. I wouldn't want to burden you. It's been a little better lately, but it's still rare for me to go more than a few months without going to the hospital. It wouldn't be as easy as just leaving and going wherever. Not right now, anyway. Maybe someday, if I improve more."
She swallowed roughly, trying to keep the sadness from showing on her face. She wanted to protest, to say she wouldn't mind. She could look after them, make sure they got to a doctor whenever they needed to. But as if already knowing her response, they kept talking.
"And more importantly than that, what if I die? My condition isn't terminal, but there's been scares before. There's a chance of me dying young no matter what. If I'd be leaving you all alone...No. I'd be afraid of what would happen to you."
"I..."
"We should stay in touch anyway though. We can still be friends."
"Yeah." She nodded, forcing a smile. "Definitely. I'll visit you all the time. If we don't get in, we can watch Danganronpa together anyway and make fun of the losers who stole our spots. It'll be great."
"I think it's a little too late for that now, don't you?"
"What, scared of causing a scandal?" she teased weakly. "No one's ever just ditched the show after getting accepted. It'd be newsworthy at least."
"Newsworthy, yes, but not in a good way."
Well, she couldn't exactly argue with that. She shrugged, pulling away from their shoulder in order to give them a kiss. Instantly, some of their tension diminished as they smiled into it, lingering for much longer than before.
All too soon, however, the moment was abruptly put to an end anyway, door opening as a nurse came bustling in. Himiko's face flushed and she broke away from the kiss, though she didn't bother getting up from Korekiyo's lap. She was almost as much of a fixture here as Kiyo themself, so the nurses usually didn't give her a hard time, even when she stayed past the end of visiting hours. She didn't recognize the one here now, perhaps she was someone new.
"How are we doing?" the nurse asked Kiyo, noting down a few numbers from a monitor. Himiko zoned out as they answered a few questions about how they felt, how they were breathing, and so on. She used to pay close attention, soaking up every tidbit of information on their health, but she'd grown less anxious over time as she got used to what was normal and what wasn't. Today, all things considered, was normal. They'd probably be discharged in the next day or two.
"I heard you got a letter from Danganronpa today. Congratulations." It was only then that Himiko jolted back to attention, glancing over. The nurse seemed politely interested, but she couldn't get a read on whether she had a positive or negative opinion on it.
"Thank you," Korekiyo said. "Himiko received one too," they added a moment later, nodding toward her. "I consider myself quite lucky to have the chance to participate alongside her."
"Ah, your girlfriend? Well, congratulations to you too then. I'll be back to check on you later, Shinguuji-san."
Once they were alone again, the atmosphere wasn't exactly the same as it had been before.
"Girlfriend, huh?" Himiko quipped, arching an eyebrow. It was the most accurate term for what they had going on, and in all fairness, it was the only thing the nurse could reasonably assume, seeing her on their lap like this. They'd just never really said it out loud before.
"What, you don't want to be?"
"Hmm..." She pretended to think about it, but not for too long, not wanting to make them nervous. "I dunno, I think I'm okay with that." Even for a joke, it was difficult to hold back enough to give off the impression of casual indifference.
"You think?" they echoed back at her, all indignant tone and adorably pouty face. "Not much enthusiasm."
"No, really, I think I'm pretty lucky. Lots of people would want a girlfriend as cute as you. Would kill for the opportunity, even. It's just..." She bit her lip, glancing off in the direction of the window. "What would you say if I wanted to be more than that?" When she looked back to Kiyo's face, they looked abnormally serious for something that they both knew was just playful messing around.
It wasn't a lie. If their relationship continued on like this, she'd be happy to get married someday. It was just awfully soon to be talking about things like that. She didn't honestly expect them to offer up that kind of commitment when the status of their very life was uncertain.
"I wouldn't mind," they said despite all that, arms still curled around her waist. "After we win the killing game, a flashy proposal will be all but expected."
"Someone's confident now." Himiko raised an eyebrow. It would be more encouraging if she thought it was real, but it'd probably be enough to fool anyone else.
"People like us don't apply to Danganronpa thinking we'll live," Shinguuji said, and she could just about imagine a wry smile on their face behind that mask. "The weirdos, the easy ones to demonize...they always die. That's what I'm counting on."
"That's morbid." She made a face, looking at their pretty features and wondering how anyone in their right mind would make this person the token freak. "Would it be rude of me to say I don't want you to die?"
"No, I don't think so. It probably means you still have more humanity than most of the people here. I don't want you to die either." They paused, taking a deep breath that seemed to catch in their throat along the way. Their free hand, the one not holding her own, fiddled with the zipper of their backpack, where she knew there was an inhaler stashed away. "And yet we're both still here trying to kill ourselves. Why is that, I wonder?"
"I don't know. I bet you could come up with a theory though. You don't need an Ultimate talent to see the world for what it is."
"That's what you want, right? For me to have hope and try to live?"
What she wanted was for neither of them to have gotten those letters in the first place. She wanted to go back to that day at the convention center and ditch auditions with them to have lunch at a shitty diner instead, joking around and making plans to hang out without the looming spectre of death hanging over their heads.
"Yeah, that's right," she said softly. "I want us to win together, and then we'll have an amazing life with our huge piles of money or whatever. Away from all the people who've hurt us."
"Then that's what we'll do," they said as if it was settled just like that. "And then you won't be my girlfriend anymore. You'll be my fiancee. It's a promise."