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Tears soaked into the fabric of Max’s pillowcase as he gripped it tightly to his chest. He tried not to sniffle as more angry tears slipped down his face. He had already screamed into the fluffy pillow with all his might, almost until his throat felt raw, but the anger in his heart still hadn’t burned away.
He wanted to scream more but not into the people but at his family who were all downstairs doing who knows what since his little outburst. At least that’s what his Uncle Howard would play it down as since he believed everyone but himself was dramatic and with Howard talking like that would come the torment from his cousins, which he hated most of all.
Max bit his tongue as another hot flash of anger rolled through him, causing more tears to slide down his face. He wanted to march back downstairs and start chewing them all out again, but he was too exhausted from his anger and from crying to pull himself from his bed.
He sniffled as he buried his face in his pillows, trying to force the tears to stop as a knock on his bedroom door echoed through his room.
“Leave me alone,” Max called out, his voice muffled by the pillow that he still had his face buried in. He didn’t want to see anyone at the moment no matter who they were.
Another knock came on the door, but this time Max ignored it as he clung even tighter to his pillow. He removed one of his arms from around it as he reached around to find the end of his blankets in hopes of pulling them over his head to block out the world even more. Luckily his hands fisted into the soft fabric before pulling them over him and the pillow, his eyes shut tightly as he tried to force himself to fall asleep.
For a few moments, all was quiet and Max relaxed a little, believing that whoever had been at his bedroom door was finally gone and was finally leaving him alone. He was proven wrong only a second later as he heard the sound of his door handle being pushed down and the sound of his door being opened before being closed after whoever it was had walked in.
The sound of feet tapping against the wood of the floor filled his ears as the person who had come into his bedroom made their way towards him.
“It is only me, my Little Helper,” A familiar and comforting woman’s voice said as small clinking sounds could be heard near his nightstand. “I only came up to bring you some things to help make you feel better,” The woman said, her accent curling around every word as she sat down next to Max on his bed.
Max was a little surprised to hear speaking English at this time of year since during the Christmas season she often only spoke in German. She never truly told them why she did this, the only answer she gave them was that it was out of respect and she left it at that. That was a good enough answer for all of them and they never pushed it but that didn’t mean Max didn’t sometimes wonder what she had meant by respect.
Max stayed completely for a minute or so, before letting out a sigh of defeat and removing the blankets from his head and pulling his tear-stained face away from his pillow. He blinked a few times to clear his vision of his unshed tears, to see the comforting face of his Omi staring at him with a gentle smile.
“There you are, My Little Helper,” Omi said with a smile as she reached up and carefully moved some of his unruly curls from his face. “I was beginning to think that you had run away to start your own cookie business and had taken all my recipes along with you,” She joked as Max leaned into her touch, tears still slipping down his face now and then.
“I don’t need to steal your recipes, Omi,” Max said before reaching up to wipe the stray tears away. “They’re all up here,” He joked while tapping the side of his head, making Omi hum and nod at his words.
“Then I taught you well,” Omi praised as she ran her fingers through Max’s dark curls, being careful not to let her mother’s ring get hung in his hair.
“Yeah,” Max replied quietly as he settled his head back against the side of the pillow while Omi continued to pet his head.
Omi frowned a little when Max looked away, a slight ache in her heart at seeing her grandson so angry and sad. For half a second she felt fear run through her as she looked down at him before looking towards the window where she could see snow falling outside. She forced the fear away as she looked back down at her grandson, who still looked miserable.
“As I said before, I brought you some things to make you smile again, My Little Helper,” Omi cooed as she pulled her hands away from Max’s head, still using the nickname she had given him. She reached towards the nightstand where she had placed the large mug of hot chocolate and the plate of Christmas cookies she had brought for him. “Hot chocolate makes everything better,” She said softly as she held the mug with both of her hands as she waited for Max to sit up to take the hot drink.
Max looked at her as he pushed himself up from his bed and into a sitting position before taking the mug from her careful hands. He felt the warmth from both the mug and from Omi’s hands seep into his own as he cradled the mug close so he wouldn’t spill it all over himself or all over his bed.
“Like always, you’re right,” Max agreed as he brought the mug to his mouth and took a long drink. “Thank you, Omi,” He whispered softly, leaning his head against his Omi’s shoulder as she brought the plate of Christmas cookies onto his bed in front of them.
“You’re so very welcome, My Little Helper,” Omi gently said before pressing a kiss against his thick hair.
The grandmother and grandson sat in silence for a moment as Max took a few more drinks from his hot chocolate. He sniffled every now and then as he got his tears under control, having had something to drink to help him calm down.
Despite having calmed down, anger, humiliation, and sadness ran through Max’s blood, making him lean farther into his grandmother’s side.
“I’m sorry I got so mad earlier,” Max said after taking another sip of his hot chocolate and taking a bite out of a gingerbread man’s foot. “I don’t hate you, I don’t hate any of you,” He explained as he nibbled continued to nibble at the cookies. “I was tired of all the fighting and all the yelling, it all just got too much,” He admitted as a few more tears slipped down his face.
Max relaxed as he felt Omi’s wrapped her arm around him in a one-armed hug to pull him closer to her side.
“It is okay, My Little Helper, we all lose ourselves to anger sometimes,” Omi whispered as she leaned her head against Max’s own as she watched him eat, listening to the slight sniffles he let out. “We all say things when anger overtakes us, when it overtakes our hearts, and when it overtakes our minds,” She spoke softly a far off look started to cloud her eyes but she forced herself to stay in the moment with her grandson. “But the important thing is that we do not let our anger consume us,” She explained as she patted his leg gently, letting him know that she wasn’t hurt by his words, but she was worried about him.
“I just don’t understand,” Max said as he finished his cookie, a deep sadness in his gaze that made Omi’s heart ache. “Every year things just get worse and worse no matter how hard we try to keep the peace,” He said as a few more tears began to slip down his face while a bitterness filled his voice. “Mom and Aunt Linda always fight, Uncle Howard always belittles Dad and everything he does, then there’s Stevie and Jordan who hate me for some reason,” He gritted out as the tears began to come faster and faster down his face. “Not even Howie likes me. The only one that likes me from Mom’s side of the family is Baby Chrissie and this is only the second time I’ve met her,” Max said as he tried to stop crying knowing that his Omi never liked it when he was this upset.
Max gripped tighter to the handle of his hot chocolate until it was digging into his hand, causing a little pain. His grip loosened as he felt Omi pull him even closer to her side if that was even possible. Max let his eyes flutter shut as he felt her kiss the top of his curls, just like she had done ever since he was a little kid.
“Oh, My Little Helper, sometimes when people lose their Christmas spirit their hearts change,” Omi explained a dark sadness creeping into her voice that Max had heard only a few times before.
“Then Stevie and Jordan must have lost their Christmas spirit the day I was born because that’s the only reason I can think of as to why they hate me so much,” Max growled out knowing that his words weren’t true and that they made no sense but the anger he felt told him that he was right.
“They don’t hate you,” Omi whispered as she laid her head against his once more and moved the plate of cookies closer to him so he could have another one.
“It sure seems like they do,” Max said with a shrug as he reached for another cookie like Omi was prompting him to. “Why else would they treat me like they do?” He asked in confusion, his words laced with hurt as he took a bite from his fresh cookie, which just so happened to be the gingerbread man’s head this time. “We used to be close all of us and then one day they just decided I was some bug they could step on whenever they please,” He complained, his anger justified as he began to drink his hot chocolate once again.
Omi stayed silent for a moment as she tried to think about what to say to him, knowing her grandson was hurt by his cousins’ actions. She had seen them grow up with one another and knew what he meant one second they had all been having snowball fights in the backyard and now they acted as if they wanted to kill one another.
“Oh, My Little Helper,” Omi whispered as she placed another kiss against his forehead. “Sometimes things happen and people change,” She said as she watched Max take another bite of his cookie and another sip from his hot chocolate, which she could tell he was nearly done with. “Sometimes it changes for the better and sometimes it feels like it changes for the worst,” She explained as she began to run her fingers through Max’s hair once more, trying to comfort him as best she could. “And sometimes when people change that part of them, the part of them that we knew so well, is lost,” She admitted the sadness returning to her voice as she pulled Max closer to her as if scared he would vanish into thin air.
Max didn’t say a word as he took the last few sips of his hot chocolate before Omi carefully pulled the mug from his hands.
“How is it lost?” Max asked, his voice shaky as he looked up at her with tear glazed eyes.
“I don’t truly know,” Omi said as she picked up the plate of cookies and placed it on his nightstand. “Who they used to be is just lost inside of them,” She explained with a small shrug as she felt Max snuggle closer to her and bury his face in his shoulder. “But you need to remember something, Max,” She said as she squeezed him in a tight hug that was surprisingly strong for Omi’s age.
“What?” Max asked, looking up at his grandmother, who gave him a small smile in return.
“That somewhere deep down inside of them, inside of all of us, is that kindness and warmth that we were born,” Omie explained as she blinked back her own tears as dark memories began to fill her mind. “Sometimes that kindness is never seen again, unfortunately,” She said, the same cloudy look coming back to her eyes as she squeezed Max once more. “But sometimes with the right event taking place that kindness and warmth can be found again,” She whispered into his hair as she felt Max’s fingers dig into her red Christmas sweater as his tears began to soak through the yarn on her shoulder. “It just takes the right person to help them find that warmth,” She said as she moved Max’s head back to look him in the eyes. “To help them find their Christmas spirit once again,” She finished as Max’s walls he had put him finally broke and he began to sob.
Max clung to Omi as he cried into her sweater once again, and Omie didn’t move as she held her grandson in a tight hug that held all her strength. She rubbed his back as he continued to sob, letting out all the hurt he felt since the day had begun.
Omi didn’t let go of Max for a long time, not even when her grandson’s sobbed and turned into hiccups and not when his hiccups turned into sniffles and especially not when his sniffles turned into deep even breaths signing that he was now fast asleep.
Omi held Max as she used to when he was little. She let herself hum an old song that her own Mama used to sing to her when was young and when they still had hope. She rocked him gently as his grip on her sweater began to loosen until he was curled up in a little ball against her side.
Omi smiled gently as she carefully pulled away from her grandson, being careful not to wake him as she moved him around until he was lying on the bed. She pulled his covers back over him and tucked him even in before leaning down to place one last kiss against his forehead.
“Sweet dreams, My Little Helper,” Omi cooed softly as she ran her hand through his thick curls to move them out of his face. “Everything will be okay,” She promised gently, keeping her voice down so she wouldn’t wake him from his much-needed sleep. “All you have to do is believe,” She said before pulling her hand and smoothing at her sweater.
She stared at Max for a few moments before taking a deep breath and turning towards Max's desk to collect the letter she knew Max had hidden.
It didn’t take long to find the said letter, a frown pulling her small smile down as she saw the tears in the paper caused by the fight earlier. She looked over the words written in her grandson’s messy handwriting, a warmth coming to her heart before she folded it up and tucked it away in the pocket of her sweater. She planned to tape it up and mail it off herself, knowing that if Max destroyed the letter when he woke up that he would regret what he had done.
Omi turned to gather the dishes she had brought into Max’s room but froze as a cold chill ran down her spine, causing her to turn around towards the desk once more and look out the window. She kept herself calm as she saw the shadowy figure standing next to three in their yard. She took a deep breath as she heard the jingling of bells and the clanking of chains as the wind blew.
She didn’t look away from the figure, a determined look across her face knowing that the figure could see her and knowing that their eyes were meeting despite how far away from one another they were. She kept her eyes on him, knowing he knew what she was saying to him without her having to use words.
She looked at him knowing she was getting the message through to him loud and clear. He would take them, he would not take away what she had left, he would not take her family, not again.
Minutes passed as the two stared at one another, only space and a glass window between.
As time ticked on Omi let her eyes slide shut before she took a deep breath and after a few seconds had gone by she let herself open her eyes to look back at where the figure was. When her eyes returned to the spot the cloaked figure was gone leaving hoofprints in the snow as the only sign he had been there.
Without even thinking about it Omi moved away from the window and went to gather dishes like she had planned to do before. She picked them up in her steady hands before making her way towards the door being quiet as a mouse as to not wake Max who in the time Omi had been staring at the figure had cuddled down into his bed.
"Merry Christmas, Max," Omi whispered to her Little Helper as she headed out of his room and closed his door behind her with a tiny click.
Once outside in the hallway Omi began to make her way towards the stairs to head back to where she was sure her son and her daughter-in-law were waiting for her. She knew they were worried about Max but she also knew that they knew that he would only talk to her when he was upset like this.
Omi hummed as she made her way down the stairs holding the dishes carefully as to not let them break. She held balanced the dishes with one hand as she held the railing of the stairs with the other.
She stopped as she reached the bottom step that led to the living room surprise wide in her eyes as she saw her not just her son and her daughter-in-law but also her granddaughter who was sitting on the couch with her parents a worried look on her face. They weren't the only ones that were there who looked worried Linda, Howard, Stevie, and Jordan all sat in the living room alongside Tom, Sarah, and Beth each looking worried for Max. Omi noted that Beth, Stevie, and Jordan each had guilt shining in their eyes alongside the worry.
Tom was the first to catch sight of her causing him to quickly stand up and move towards her which caught the attention of everyone else in the room.
When her son got to her Omi let him take the two dishes from her hands and let him help her down the last step. She could feel the eyes of the other members of their family on her as worried tension become stranger than before.
“How is he, Mom?" Tom asked breaking the silence that had been in the room since Max ran up to his room and slammed the door with a thundering bang.
For a moment all was silent again as Omi looked over her son before turning her attention to the others who looked tense and sick. When the moment had passed and Omi had gotten a good look at them all she let a comforting smile grace her fingers before she reached up and cupped Tom's face much like she had when he was a little boy and was dirty from playing outside.
“Hot chocolate makes everything better,” Omi said with a nod of her head before pulling her hands back from her son's face and collecting the dishes from his hands to head towards the kitchen.
She began to hum once more as she walked away a smile still on her face as she felt the tension leave the room at her words but she knew worry still hung in the air.
Omi had meant what she said when she told Max that it only took an event no matter how big or how small to revive the warmth and Christmas spirit in someone's heart and she knew that Max would soon find out that he was the cause for that warmth and light to return to his family's lives.