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It was perfect.
The moonlight touched his features elegantly, a dance of shadows against his face. A thick scent of murky, green water filling my nose, the stars looking upon us, and that stupid ring: silver and shining.
“Will you marry me?” Bokuto asked, his voice hushed like we were the only people in the world.
I had loved him since Middle School, if I were being honest. Although, I didn’t know it back then. He was a star and I wanted nothing more than to capture him, keep him to myself, never let someone else wish upon him.
The words were impassive, burning my heart. “Very good, Bokuto-san.”
I went to Fukurodani the year after witnessing his match. He asked me to set for him, so I did. No matter how much I wished to crawl into bed after a long match or practice, I set for him. As his setter, it was my duty. At least, that’s what I told myself.
His eyes lit up and he snapped the box closed. “Really?! Ya’ think she’ll say yes?!”
In the second year of High School, I caught myself desperately wanting more than what we had. Bokuto told me I was his best friend.
I wish I was lying when I said, “Of course she will, Bokuto-san.”
He was gone my third year. I stepped up and took his spot on the team, I became the leader and knocked on his door after school every day seeking leadership advice.
A tender smile that was like a stake through the heart. “Thanks, ‘Kasshi…” He mumbled, rubbing his thumb across the box. “It means so much that you’re helping me out with this. You’re the best!” God, please, stop smiling at me like that.
As the years flew by, we stayed close and I longed after my star. I hoped that one day I may muster up the courage and tell him how much I loved him. But as the days passed by, our friendship became more solid. He was the only part of my life that was consistent as I went into the workforce. Friends were enough so long as he was in my life. As long as I was still his number one. His star as he was mine. That he’d still mess up my name in that loud voice of his.
My throat felt swollen and my heart felt much too heavy. “Shall we get going? It’s getting cold.”
Then, I watched him love someone more than he loved me.
“Aye, aye, Akaashi!” With that Bokuto stomped off, his body light with each step he took, excitement buzzing throughout him. I felt a tear roll down my cheek, then another, and another. A sob welled up in my throat and I turned my head towards the sky, suppressing it. Crying here wasn’t a good idea but then again, when do you get to choose when you’re going to cry?
“‘kaashi?” He called out, noticing I wasn’t behind him.
It was clear that night, crisp and beautiful, the sky filled with stars while the only one that mattered to me stood in front of me, ring and future in hand.
“Excuse me. I got a little emotional,” He mumbled wiping away my tears. It hurt so badly. “I’m just so happy for you two,”