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He wasn’t sure who started it, to be honest, but it was annoying as hell.
The kissing, that is.
It was probably Ashido. She was so damn touchy-feely all the time and those other idiots just let her get away with it. It wasn’t uncommon to find Kirishima, Kaminari, and Sero lined up on the couch with Ashido sprawled across their laps like some long-ass pink cat.
Whenever she tried that shit on him, Bakugou popped off explosions to scare her away. Unfortunately, the longer their tentative friendship went on, the less effective that method became. Bitch.
Anyway, at some point the lap-lounging had become straight-up cuddling, and the initiation of such activities extended to the rest of the group. Walking into the common room, you’d stumble upon Kaminari cradled in Kirishima’s lap, talking excitedly about the new game that was coming out as Sero sat beside them, one arm around Kirishima’s shoulder, and the other hand resting on Ashido's thigh as she braided his hair.
Ultimately, there was no escape for Bakugou. These were the only people he could really tolerate out of all the extras in their class, so he didn’t really have a choice but to play along with their dumbass touchy stuff.
He made sure to be a grump about it, just so no one got any fucking ridiculous ideas that he might like that shit or anything.
"Hey, Bakugou, come over here!" Kirishima flagged him down as he walked towards the kitchen to get some water.
Rolling his eyes, he grabbed a bottle from the fridge and trudged over to the couch, where that shitty-haired idiot was patting his lap with a grin. "Saved you a seat for the movie, Baku-bro."
Bakugou took those words as a challenge, and he huffed as he flopped into the waiting lap and leaned back against Kirishima’s annoyingly firm chest. "Bet you idiots picked a fucking dumb movie."
"Listen, the Bee Movie is a classic of its time and—"
"We’re not watching the Bee Movie, Denks," Ashido interrupted him, planting a kiss on his cheek as she hopped out of Sero’s arms to grab the remote.
Eyes narrowed, Kaminari slipped into Ashido's abandoned spot in Sero’s lap, pulling the boy’s lanky arms around him to solidify his position. "Well, we should! It contributed to some of the finest meme culture of our generation!"
Vengeance was his as Ashido turned around and gasped at the scene. "You asshole!" She kicked Kaminari in the shin, and he laughed in response. Then she turned her gaze on his accomplice. "Sero!"
"Listen, I had no part in this. This lap just needs someone in it."
"And you didn’t say ’save seat’."
Ashido clearly did not appreciate Kaminari’s observation, kicking him in the shin again before bodily shoving him halfway off of Sero’s lap and squeezing herself in.
"Jerks," she muttered as she flipped the TV on, surfing the channels aimlessly while she simmered. Sero grinned, wrapping her in the arm that wasn’t holding Kaminari and pulling her tight to his chest to place a kiss on her cheek. Kaminari leaned over as well, slipping a hand into hers and tugging it up to pepper her fingers with kisses until she finally cracked a smile.
The whole thing was absolutely disgusting. They weren’t even fighting right. You don’t kiss in fighting.
"Hey look, they’re playing—"
"Shitty-Hair, if you even think to suggest we watch the Harry Potter marathon for the fifth time, I will blast your ass into next week."
"…So, anyway, Godzilla is on." That comment was capped off by the press of Kirishima’s lips to the back of Bakugou’s head, and Bakugou squirmed in his seat.
Stupid extra with his stupid dyed hair and his dry ass lips. Bakugou couldn’t feel them but he just knew they were chapped as hell.
"Aw, sweet, this is the one with Mothra!"
"Mothra is OP, not gonna lie. Like, how does a moth get that big?"
"Isn't she supposed to be, like, some sort of nature god or something?"
"Everyone shut the fuck up, I'm trying to watch the damn movie!"
Bakugou felt that he was a big enough man to admit that he sometimes, on exceedingly rare occasions, may possibly enjoy the company of his so-called "friends".
But only sometimes.
Right now wasn't so bad, for instance. He, Kirishima, and Kaminari were studying in Kirishima's room. It was quiet but for the noise of flipping pages and scratching pencils, and those two idiots were actually managing to stay on task for once.
At least, that's what he thought until he dropped his eraser and had to lean down to hunt for it under the table, catching sight of their clasped hands. They couldn't exactly play footsie while sitting on the floor like this, but they were basically doing the hand equivalent, fingers twining and untwining, thumbs rubbing circles into palms.
"Oi," he growled as he straightened back up. "Quit touching each other and do your damn homework."
The other boys exchanged a look, detaching from each other with a grin. Kirishima scooted closer to Bakugou, tilting his head charmingly. "Baku-bro, if you were feeling left out you could've just said something."
A hand settled on his thigh from the other side and Kaminari leaned in as well. "Yeah, we'd love to include you!"
"That's not what I meant, shit-heads!"
Kirishima ignored him, sliding an arm around his waist and pressing a kiss to his cheek. Kaminari mirrored his actions on the other side.
What. The. Fuck.
He set off a warning shot, and Kaminari pulled back in surprise, but that damn muscle-head just snuggled closer into his shoulder.
"Get off me, dammit!"
"If you give me a kiss."
"Hey, that's cheat—"
Kaminari's complaint was cut off by Kirishima's hand slapping over his mouth. Bakugou paused, confused, then shook his head and shoved Kirishima away where he leaned over his lap. "Get back to work, fucking idiots."
He was sure the kisses the pair exchanged for the rest of their time studying were given out of pure spite.
"Morning, Bakugou!" Soft lips pressed a kiss to his temple, and he tensed in surprise.
"Raccoon Eyes," he greeted her as she sauntered off to her seat. He'd become more or less accustomed to the morning greetings at this point.
He still didn't fucking like them, though. Don't get it twisted.
Jirou was next, passing by with a quiet hello and the smoothing of her palm over his hand. She was a fringe member of their group most of the time, but their closeness had still rubbed off on her.
Sero and Kaminari burst into the room in a noisy duo, rounding on him from each side to give him a kiss on the cheek with their greetings. By now, the other students who had trickled into the class were looking on with amused expressions. He made sure to glare at each of them individually.
Kirishima rushed in at the last second, narrowly beating Aizawa-sensei into the room and escaping a tardy as he bolted to his seat.
Straight to his seat.
With no detours whatsoever.
Bakugou's brow ticked upwards in irritation. Then it did it again out of irritation that he was irritated.
Fuck. Who cares if Kirishima was late? Not like he was looking forward to their morning greetings or anything anyways. He'd already had to suffer through the others. He was actually thankful that he didn't have to feel those gross, craggy lips against his forehead.
If he was more aggressive than usual in training that day it was just because he slept really well last night.
He was alone in the kitchen that night, cooking. Not because he was still frustrated, even after beating down on his classmates.
Definitely not.
"Whatcha making, Bakugou?"
Kirishima's voice startled him, and he nearly dropped the chopsticks he was using.
"Fuck, Shitty-Hair, don't do that."
"Sorry," Kirishima laughed, coming over to stand behind Bakugou, resting his chin on his shoulder. "That looks good."
"'Course it does," Bakugou huffed, rolling the egg with a practiced hand before pouring more into the pan.
"Do I get to try some?"
"Do you deserve to eat my incredible food?"
Kirishima laughed again at the response, the sound annoyingly pleasant so close to Bakugou's ear. "I don't know, but I hope the answer is yes."
Bakugou rolled his eyes, continuing to cook as he pointedly ignored the way Kirishima's arms wormed their way around his waist. He was still kind of mad at the idiot after all.
Even so, he allowed Kirishima to sit next to him and steal some of the rolled egg off of his plate. To Bakugou's annoyance, which he made absolutely sure showed on his face, each stolen piece was paid for with a kiss.
"Thanks for the snack!" Kirishima was chipper as always as he planted one last kiss on Bakugou’s cheek. "I’ll wash the dishes for ya."
Bakugou followed him to the sink, bumping his hip with his own. "I can wash my own damn dishes."
"Then I’ll help you dry!"
It was easier to let him help, so they worked together to clean the small mess that had been made before heading up to their floor. As they reached his door, Bakugou set his hand on the knob, then paused without realizing what he was waiting for.
Kirishima tilted his head, eyeing him for a second before his lips curled into a pleased smile that looked dangerous framing his sharp teeth. Bakugou could have ducked into his room, but he stayed frozen there and allowed the other boy to step towards him, to lean in and press a kiss to the corner of his mouth.
As soon as Kirishima stepped back, he growled "Night," and flung himself through the door, slapping it shut behind him.
Dammit. It was like he’d been waiting for that kiss. And that damned dye job knew it. They were all getting in his head, he was getting too used to this kind of bullshit.
And yet, at this point he couldn’t lie to himself. He didn’t really hate the contact. Sometimes it was kinda…nice.
Fuck them. If this was how it was gonna be, he was damn sure gonna make them take responsibility.
When he and Kirishima entered the common room after their run the next morning, Sero was the only one there. He looked up at them from his seat on the couch, setting down the mug he’d been sipping from. "Morning, guys! How was your run?"
Kirishima beamed as he made his way towards the couch. "It was good! We saw a cute cat and—"
He was cut off by Bakugou’s elbow colliding with his rib cage, stopping his movement and allowing Bakugou to claim the spot he’d been aiming for on Sero’s lap.
Sero and Kirishima gaped, exchanging looks that were a mixture of surprise and confusion. Bakugou almost never initiated contact, most of the time seeming to barely tolerate it.
Bakugou himself was aware of both this fact and the looks that were being sent over his head. "Fuck off, Shitty-Hair, I got here first," he huffed, crossing his arms and leaning back on Sero’s shoulder.
"No, yeah, you sure did." Kirishima’s voice trailed off, and he cleared his throat. "But we just got back from running, we should shower or you’re gonna get Sero all sweaty, too."
"Yeah, in a sec."
Bakugou could feel Sero’s heart racing against his back, and allowed himself a small, private grin. If these dumbasses were going to torture him, he was going to give as good as he got.
The minutes stretched out in silence as Kirishima shifted nervously next to them. Finally, Bakugou unwrapped himself from Sero’s arms and stood, grabbing Kirishima by the elbow and dragging him towards the stairs. "We better hurry and clean up or we’ll be late."
"See you guys in class!" Sero’s voice called weakly from behind them, and the tremor in his voice told Bakugou today was going to be a good day.
He had plans to fluster the group as much as possible, and phase one turned out to be way easier than expected. After his break in Sero’s lap that morning, he caught the rest of the group off guard by presenting his face for kisses during morning greetings. While Sero and Kirishima adapted quickly, Ashido and Jirou giggled nervously in surprise, and Kaminari sputtered in shock before pressing the fastest peck ever to his nose.
Their reactions aligned perfectly with his expectations, and Bakugou had to suppress a pleased grin throughout class. This small success made him look forward to the evening’s initiation of phase two that much more.
Their game night had been planned since last week, and Bakugou had decided it was the perfect opportunity to watch his friends flounder.
They were playing Smash, which was a pretty even match when Bakugou wasn’t playing dirty like he was tonight. He’d been subtle at first, leaning against Kaminari’s shoulder as they played next to each other on the floor. It had unnerved the boy, but not enough to damage his playing, which simply wouldn’t do.
Bakugou decided to kick it up a notch.
As they prepped for the next round, he scooted away, giving him room to flop onto his side so that his head landed in Kaminari’s lap. He felt the boy’s legs tense at the contact and he bit back a smirk, imagining the confused look on his dumbass face.
As Bakugou stretched out in his new position, his feet bumped into Ashido's legs where she reclined against Kirishima’s shins at the other end of the couch. He figured he’d take this opportunity as well and slid his legs over her lap.
"What the fuck is going on?" Jirou mumbled from somewhere above him as she beat Sero’s ass into the ground on the screen.
Despite his efforts, Bakugou lost that round to Kirishima, and he clicked his tongue in distaste. Pushing himself off the floor, he ignored Sero’s apprehensive look and aimed for Kirishima’s lap.
"Woah, hey there Baku-bro!" Kirishima gave him that radiant smile, lowering his arms to loosely wrap around Bakugou, who was getting comfortable on top of him. "To what do I owe the pleasure?"
"Shut up," he grumbled, flipping through the character options and selecting Olimar.
His change in character didn’t help his case. Somehow, Sero was making a comeback from his spectacular failure the previous round and managed to take Bakugou out first.
"Damn it!" Bakugou turned to glare at his killer. Sero just winked at him before returning his attention to the game, which further fueled his ire. He shoved his face into Kirishima’s shoulder with a growl, giving his skin a harsh nip in annoyance.
Kirishima yelped, missing his jump and falling to his death, which used up his last life. "What was that for?"
"Beating me last round. And not killing Sero."
"The goal of the game is to beat each other, ‘Tsuki."
Bakugou bit him again for using that forbidden nickname. Kaminari had called him that once back when this whole "getting closer" thing started and was severely punished for it. It had been off limits ever since, but occasionally someone would use it to rile him up.
"If I activate my quirk when you do that, you’ll break your teeth."
Bakugou’s grin was wicked, posed over the flesh exposed by Kirishima’s tank top. "You wouldn’t dare." He proved it with another bite, this one closer to Kirishima’s neck, making him jolt with a small gasp.
"Your flirting is incredibly distracting right now!" Kaminari called, mashing away at his controller as Jirou tried to send him into the stratosphere.
"Jealous," was Bakugou’s monotonous response, his teeth idly scraping over Kirishima’s collarbone.
"Bites don’t count." Sero’s voice was calm as he finished Ashido off.
Bakugou’s eyes narrowed. "Don’t count for what?"
"Uhhh— Damn it, Jirou!"
"Don’t hate the player, hate the game, baby." She used one foot to pat Kaminari’s shoulder consolingly as she moved her character across the map to face off with Sero.
"Don’t count for what?" Bakugou repeated. Kirishima’s arms twitched around him, and he gave his shoulder a warning nibble that said, Somebody better answer the damn question.
Jirou groaned, and Sero dropped his controller in his lap with a grin, replying smoothly, "Don’t count as an against-the-rules distraction. He wasn’t even biting you, Kaminari."
"Whatever! This game is rigged."
Bakugou hummed in agreement, sliding out of Kirishima’s lap and into Sero’s. His lanky arms were around him at once. "I’m not gonna let you win just because you wanna be held."
"Fuck you, Tapehead. I don’t need you to let me do anything."
Kirishima and Sero stared at each other, eyebrows raised. He hadn’t denied wanting to be held, and Bakugou could practically hear them thinking that this was a first. The tips of his ears burned, but it would be more embarrassing to say anything now, so he just resolved to totally and completely kick their asses.
He claimed his victory, thrusting his fists in the air with a roar. "Fuck all of you, I am the king of this game!"
"Yes, yes," Sero chuckled, placing a kiss just below his ear. "You did very well."
"Yeah, good job, ‘Tsuki!" Kirishima’s attempt was interrupted by an explosion in his face, narrowly mitigated by the last-second activation of his quirk.
"Victory kisses for Bakugou!" Ashido cheered, pouncing on him to peck at his cheeks.
"The fuck— That wasn’t a thing!"
Jirou gave a sly smile, leaning in for a kiss. "It is now."
"Hey, I didn’t get to give him one because he used his quirk!"
"Mina, get out of his lap, I can’t reach him like this!"
Okay, maybe he’d bitten off a little more than he could chew. Still, his victory tasted sweet.
The next day was a day off. Usually, this meant that Bakugou could take his time cooking something nice for his breakfast before the rest of his classmates decided it was time to get up and cause a ruckus.
Usually.
This morning, he was greeted by the sight of his posse of idiots pressed shoulder to shoulder in front of the stove.
"What are you knuckleheads up to?" He rasped, voice still rough with sleep, and the four troublemakers jumped.
"Knuckleheads is a new one," Ashido mused, grinning over her shoulder at him.
"He must still be half-asleep if he’s not using curses."
Bakugou cuffed Kaminari on the back of the head for that before leaning forward to rest his chin on his shoulder. "The fuck is that?"
"That would be breakfast!" Kirishima said with his usual cheer, despite the early hour.
"Looks like vomit."
Ashido laughed, slipping an arm around his waist and pressing an affectionate kiss to his cheek as Kirishima rebuffed him with, "Hey, don’t judge yet, they’re not done cooking!" Kirishima slipped a spatula under one of the questionable piles in the pan and gracelessly flopped it over. Now it sort of resembled food, having firmed up and become a dark golden color.
"Pancakes?" Bakugou pressed closer to the bodies around him under the guise of getting a better view of the stove.
"Pancakes," Sero confirmed, stepping over to give him a mug of tea and a kiss to the temple. "With oats and peaches and cinnamon."
"Explains why it looks like vomit."
"It’ll taste delicious," Kirishima promised, sliding the finished pancakes onto a plate before pouring fresh batter onto the pan.
"We’re pretty sure they’ll taste delicious," Sero amended, having remained leaning against Bakugou’s back, so he was caged in from all sides.
Incredibly, he found he did not mind it. Of course, if someone brought it up that would no longer be the case.
They stayed like that while Kirishima finished cooking, watching him mostly in silence as he hummed contentedly to himself. When they’d all settled onto the couch with their plates, squished together and half on each others’ laps, Bakugou finally deigned to ask, "The fuck is this all for, anyways?"
His friends eyed each other, seeming to have some silent conversation before saying more or less in unison, "International Old People Day."
His fork stopped halfway to his mouth. "The fuck did you just say to me?"
There was a flurry of motion. Someone slung their arm around his neck, peppering his cheek with kisses. Another hand grabbed his chin firmly, opening his mouth so someone else could feed him a forkful of pancake. His hair was ruffled as he chewed mindlessly, confused and infuriated in equal parts.
He swallowed. "You guys are fucking weird as hell."
Their laughter warmed him in a way that made him feel like he’d combust.
"We missed International Best Friends Day," Kirishima admitted with a shy grin, offering another bite of pancake on his fork. Bakugou eyed it like it might bite back before accepting it with a scrape of his teeth against the metal. "We just wanted to tell you we appreciate all you do for us."
"You’re always helping us study and train, and we definitely would’ve failed out by now without you," Kaminari chimed, resting his head against Sero’s shoulder.
"At least you shit-heads know that fucking much."
Ashido laughed, pressed up against Kirishima’s back as she mussed Bakugou’s hair further. "We’re just thankful to have a grumpy guy like you to keep us in line."
"I’m not fucking grumpy," he grumped in response, fully aware how contradictory he was being.
"You are, but we love you." Kirishima kissed him on the nose, then nudged his hand towards his plate. "Eat up, we’re gonna go spar after this."
Bakugou clicked his tongue, refusing to acknowledge the burning he felt at the tips of his ears. "You morons chose the worst breakfast to make for a sparring date. This shit’s not gonna last."
"Date?" Sero whispered to Kaminari. Bakugou elbowed him in the ribs without hesitation. ‘Course these jackasses would get hung up on semantics.
He cleared his plate, hauling himself off the couch to wash it and put it away properly. Figuring he’d change into his spare training uniform in the locker room, he called over his shoulder, "Last one there has to kiss Mineta!"
His grin was manic as he dashed out the door to the cacophony of curses and bodies tripping over each other in panic behind him. As always, they were too easy.
A few weeks after their pancake breakfast—Which, for the record, Bakugou had been right about not lasting. Kaminari and Ashido started bitching that they were starving not even an hour into sparring.—Bakugou found himself in the kitchen, making way more breakfast than usual.
He listened to the ringing of the phone pressed to his ear as he plated the last of the food. After several seconds, a low, tired voice answered, "What’s up, Baku-bro?"
"Collect the rest of your merry band of idiots and get downstairs."
“Wha—"
"You have five minutes." And he hung up.
Not like he needed to wait for an answer. He knew they’d come.
They stumbled in as a collective, Sero pushing Kaminari along as Kirishima yawned behind them, Ashido's lifeless form draped over his shoulder. He patted her on the butt before moving to set her down. "Meens, you’re gonna wanna see this."
She rubbed her eyes, then joined the boys in staring at the table in surprise. The spread of food laid out seemed to wake her right up. "Baku-babe, what the heck is all this?"
"International Idiots Day." His grin was fierce as he plopped down in a chair.
"Bakugou," Kaminari sniffled, disgustingly more emotional in his drowsy state. "You did this for us?"
"No. For the other group of idiots that insist on fucking pestering me all the time with dumbass questions. Sit your ass down and eat."
"Thank you!" Kaminari’s arms wrapped around his neck with a squeeze, and Bakugou graciously allowed him to press one wet kiss to his cheek before shoving him off with a calloused hand.
"Eat before I blow your ass up."
The food was devoured, the foursome singing Bakugou’s praises with full mouths, much to his irritation. When it was all gone, he said, "Dishes."
The jut of his chin didn’t go unnoticed, and Kirishima was the first to give him a thank-you kiss, the others quickly following suit as they filed to the sink. Bakugou remained seated, pleased with his work, though his face would never show it.
He knew no one would dare call him out on it, but he was getting a little soft for these idiots. Like, he’d probably give a shit if one of them died. Probably.
Another week went by, and they found themselves gathered in the common area for another movie night. This time, Bakugou picked the damn movie in advance. He wasn’t taking any chances since all his friends had shitty taste.
The usual suspects settled in: Jirou, Bakugou, Kaminari, and Sero squished onto one couch and Ashido and Kirishima splayed out on the floor in front of them. Sero passed around bowls of popcorn as they got settled.
Over the mild chatter of their friends, Bakugou turned to Jirou and said, "Pass the remote here."
Jirou did as he asked without a word, holding it towards him and casually presenting her cheek in the same motion. Bakugou pressed his lips against it in a quick peck before turning back to the TV and flipping through the settings to start the movie, failing to notice the silence that had fallen around them.
He was about to press play when a shriek from Kaminari made him jump and turn. He found Sero with eyes wide in surprise, Ashido with a hand over her mouth as she shook Kirishima’s shoulder, the redhead looking equally, if not a little gleefully, shocked.
"What the heck! How was Jirou the first one to get a kiss?" Kaminari tugged at his hair in distress, pointing at the girl accusingly. "You’re not even around half the time!"
Jirou shrugged, not bothering to disguise her self-satisfied grin. "You guys try too hard."
"Try too—" Bakugou was starting to put the pieces together. "You fuckers were betting on who I would kiss first?"
"Well, there wasn’t money involved or anything—"
Bakugou cut Sero off, sharply raising one hand. "What was the fucking bet?"
"They each have to cover my trash duties once," Jirou informed him happily.
"The fuck," Bakugou growled. "You assholes were betting on me and I don’t get a cut of the rewards? You’re all doing my trash duties, too!"
"Fine, fine, but I want a kiss too, Bakugou!" Ashido leapt towards his lap, planting her hands on his shoulders as she straddled him. "I’ll cover your turn at trash twice."
He rolled his eyes, feeling his ears burn with everyone’s expectant gazes on him. "Doesn’t mean anything if you have to bribe me into it, dumbass. Wasn’t that the whole point of the stupid bet?"
She huffed, but didn’t resist when Kirishima pulled her off Bakugou’s lap with a laugh. "Let’s just watch the movie. I’m sure you’ll get one of those kisses eventually."
And yeah, when the movie ended and the group split up to go to bed maybe he gave them all a stupid kiss. And maybe Kaminari and Ashido cried about it. Fucking morons.
But they were his fucking morons, and he guessed he was okay with that.