Archive of Our Own

Huening Kai had been told before that he was a forgetful person he however did not know how on earth he managed to forget to inform his childhood bestfriend that he was coming back to Hawaii for the holidays. It was mostly surprising because Kai and his best friend Y/n talked almost every week. They had been friends since diapers and he knew she'd probably freak out the instant she found out he was coming home. Kai himself was freaking out too. He left for South Korea when he was twelve to thirteen and he had only gone back to see her about two years after that. Suffice to say Kai hasn't actually seen his best friend since he was about fourteen or fifteen and there, naturally, came some anxiety with the whole meeting up after three to four years situation. It might also be the fact that Kai was pretty sure he developed a crush over the years on said bestfriend...but that was beside the point!

His issue was, that he wasn't even sure she could meet up with him at all. In his excitement and hurry to run home to Hawaii he 'd blanked on telling her that he would be there for Christmas. She was one grade lower than him, had a job, and had the holidays to plan for, not to mention the end of the year high school finals. He really hoped to see her. That's why the instant he got home and unpacked everything he had brought from his dorm in South Korea he began to search his small town for her.

Kai's home in Hawaii wasn't too big. It had a fairly nice sized mall and a few movie theaters but all in all he could walk around the whole of the main part of the city in about two hours. He wished to surprise her to makeup for his total lack off coordination so he decided to find her about the city himself.

He checked her favorite book store first and then the spot in the food court at the mall where they and a few of their old friends used to eat. She wasn't in either of the places. Next was their favorite spot in the park that one day she'd shown him on a video call a few months ago. He found it in all its decorated fairy light glory but there was no sign of her. By the time he looked around it was late probably about six o'clock and the clouds hung heavy in the sky almost as if they were screaming out a warning about the torrent of rain that was about to descend. Kai bit his lip considering briefly about just giving up and texting her. The sun was setting and Kai was reaching for his phone when a thought struck him. Kai abruptly remembered that-oh yeah!-she worked! He opened his phone to shoot his his sister Lea a text. He sat beneath the tree covered in fairy lights at the park while figuring out how to get to the place his sister said she worked at. Lea provided the answer in record time (a small book/record/coffee shops downtown about a ten minute walk away from the hideout) and Kai set out to find it. When he reached the place he realized just how much the place reflected his best friend. It was small and home-y, and tucked away neatly in small corner of a outdoor mall lot. It screamed retro and Kai couldn't help the smile that broke out on his face as he looked at it. Kai stared at the door handle for a few seconds, palms sweaty and pulse probably going at a pace that was unhealthy. He took a deep breath and pushed open the door.

The first thing he noticed when he entered was the lack of people. He supposed it made sense. He was in America during Christmas time and it was past five. Most people would rather be home spending time with family than getting a coffee and a book at a small mom and pops restaurant(?)/store(?). Not only that, it seemed the instant he stepped in the place the sky had started its downpour. Kai vaguely wondered what he was going to do seeing as he had no umbrella and his flimsy raincoat wouldn't do anything to dissuade the fierce Hawain storm.

The second thing he noticed was that of the back profile of the only barista left in the store. Even from here Kai could tell who it was. His throat closed up as he quickly attempted to toss out a witty line that would have her whirling around and flinging herself into his arms. Kai however couldn't. He hadn't seem her face to face in a good few years and he abruptly realized this. He knew what she looked like over facetime, he knew that every time he saw her face from an ocean away his breath caught in his throat and his heart hammered. How would he even LIVE through seeing her in real life? As he went speechless he couldn't help but bemoan the fact that he'd even talked to Yeonjun about it a few weeks before he left. He'd asked his brazen hyung to help him woo her and Yeonjun provided him with what he called "Flirting 101", spoiler alert Kai failed it.

Kai mentally shook himself to try again but the only noise that made it past his lips was deep grumble that vaguely wounded like a "annyeo-uh, I mean, h-hi?". At that however the girl did whip around. She looked as if she were about to say something snarky but the instant their eyes met her jaw dropped open. Time seemed to freeze for a split second as their eyes met. His brown eyes latched onto hers that went from a dull, worn out color to a sparkling hue of excitement. Time unfroze and all he heard before she flung herself over the counter was a breathless and elated gasp of, "Kai??!"

--

If you asked Y/n how her day had been previous to her best friend showing up out of the blue she would've said something along the lines of "absolutely fucking shitty". All day she had been dealing with rude customers and screaming children and the holiday rush. Not to mention they were short staffed so her and two of her coworkers had to manage the fairly well-sized record/book/coffee shop themselves. Finals were also kicking her ass and she couldn't help but obsess over what she was going to do for Christmas. So when the game of rock paper scissors she and her coworkers played to see who was going to be closing deemed her the loser she almost lost it. And you consider "almost" her going into the back and kicking an empty pile of boxes so hard that they arced in a way a soccer player would be proud of, then yes, that description would be accurate. Y/n's co-workers left and she got busy cleaning tables and counters, sweeping, organizing books and records and cleaning left over dishes. She wanted to both scream and cry and most of all rant to get best friend over facetime. Kai made her feel better no matter what happened to her during her bad days. She joked with him sometimes that it was his super power. So when the door dinged signaling someone was shopping exactly two minutes away from closing time she almost had a mental break down. God could she get a fucking break? And because she hadn't had the forethought to lock the door before cleaning she had to deal with the consequences and be nice to the stupid late holiday shopper that was probably here to make her life hell.
She pondered briefly if losing her job would be worth the scathing comment she wanted to throw at the undeserving customer. Y/n decided it was but as she whipped around to say it...she froze. Her eyes met the person's own gaze and her heart stopped dead in her chest. For a moment her brain didn't register who exactly it was, just the fact that said person did not look like the kind of person she was expecting.

He was tall about six inches taller than she was and-holy shit. It was Kai. The world stopped spinning for a moment. Somehow the only person she wanted to see today was standing not ten feet away from her. She recalled how just the single thought of facetiming him when she got home was the only thing that kept her from a murderous rampage throughout the day flickered through the forefront of her mind.
n Relief and giddiness ricocheted through her body and her heart so hard she swore she almost felt it it knock the wind out of her. Her lips and body were moving before she could react and suddenly she was saying his name and flying over the counter to hug him. And when they crashed together it felt like a supernova exploded in her chest. Her heart sung at the feeling of being pressed against his chest, and deliriously she registered that she fit perfectly beneath his head. His chin rested on top of her hair and his arms locked around her back. His chest vibrated beneath her head in a fond giggle his scent wrapping her in the coziest softest cocoon ever. She hasn't felt this secure in who knows how long. She breathed in a deep shuddering breath and realized that there were tears in her eyes. She attempted to blink them away but it only caused them to fall and soak his baby blue sweatshirt. Y/n's face was shoved into his chest and it was starting to get uncomfortable but she didn't care. She wanted to hold him and be held for the rest of forever, but the moment was broken with Kay's amused little, "Missed me?" At that she ripped herself away to glare up at him.

"Kai Kamal Huening! Why didn't you tell me you were coming you bastard!" The sound of a dolphin shriek echoed in the empty store as she tiptoed to reach his head and give him the fiercest nouggie she could manage.

--

Kai hadn't expected them to click so well after not actually seeing each other for so long, but they did. Their personalities fit like puzzle pieces still...as did their hands. After a long conversation filled with catching up and funny stories, and after Y/n closed the store they ended up walking home under the protection of Y/n's umbrella (which she had teased him over).

//

"Really Kai? You live in Hawaii HOW long and you still don't remember to bring an umbrella? December is the most rainy month here!”e
"I know that! I was just so focused on trying to find my best friend because I missed her that I forgot! How does that make this situation bad?! It doesn't! In fact it makes me sweet!”

//

By now though all had gone quiet in the city and not two minutes after they left Y/n had snatched up his hands to hold it under the claim that her fingers were cold. Thing was, her fingers weren't cold at all. Y/n was a naturally warm person and cold didn't affect her much so Kai saw right through her excuse. Yet still he agreed to it. It wasn't like he hated the idea of holding her hand either. Kai at first had stared down at their connected hands and how well they fit together. Her hand was very small compared too his and it felt dainty and nearly fragile in his grip. It made him feel oddly protective. Kai was shocked out of thinking by her squeezing his hand. His eyes flickered up to hers surprised at the little motion. Kai blushed faintly and squeezed her hand back, Kai swore he'd do anything to see the sweet smile that broke across her face at the motion. The walk after that was filled with a warm silence that even the rain couldn't penetrate.

They reached Kai's house just as the sky darkened completely and as the temperature started to drop. They both ran to his front steps quickly throwing open the front door and giggling as they closed the umbrella and raindrops showered them. They were welcomed with warm honey sweet light and the warmth of a fire place that swathed the two story house in a blanket of warmth. Y/n breathed in deep the smell of a house she hadn't been in a few years and felt comfort wash over her. Kai watched as a soft smile broke out in her face and the rigidity in her shoulders visibly melted away. Kai's eyes softened at the sight and he reached out to softly pat her head and ruffle her hair. She smiled wide but playfully batted his hand away.

"Just because I'm smaller than you doesn't give you headpat rights, Kamal." she pointed an accusatory finger at him with a fake glare.

"You're just so short," he smirked, " it's just so hard not to. You're like a little mouse. "

"HEY-" Y/n started but was interrupted by a voice from the top of the stairs in front of the door. "Ah, so you found her? " Lea asked half congrtulatory.

"Only after three hours."

"Three hours?!"

"I wanted to surprise you!"

"Alright, alright shut up both of you . I swear you bicker so much it's a wonder you're friends at all." Lea once again interrupted, "Mom and dad are out getting dinner so you guys better have eaten." And with that she departed to the livingroom. Kai stuck out his tongue at her as she left and Y/n rolled her eyes at the childish action. He tugged her up to his room excited to show her how much he changed it that day before he went to go look for her. He however was surprised with her harsh words when she saw it:

"LEDs, Kai? Really? People are gonna think you're a fuckboi!" There were tears in her eyes as she clutched his bed frame for support as she laughed.

"I thought they looked cool," he pouted once she finished laughing.

She sighed and walked up to him to wrap her arms around his waist (she was pretty average in height but even she couldn't reach this six foot mans shoulders very easily), "I'm just fucking with you Kai, they're very cool."

"...you still hate them don't you?"

"...yeah."

He couldn't help but laugh at that. The rest of the night they spent watching some random show on Netflix and drinking hot chocolate only exiting his room for food and drinks. At the end of night they took a nap at Kai's demand. She had told him that her body hurt and that she was tired after work and his immediate response had been to force her to nap with him (and if he was also motivated to nap just so he could hold her, no one had to know). So that's where they ended up at ten at night, Y/n fast asleep with Kai's arms wrapped around her body. He swore he wasn't trying to be creepy or anything but he couldn't help but watch her sleep. She looked so peaceful, mouth open in light snore throat would every once in a while turn into undignified snorts that definitely shouldn't be cute, but we're to Kai. Her hair fell easily over her shoulder and face and Kai couldn't help the small giggle that left his mouth when it fell over her forehead in a slight mimicry of a mop. His thumb rubbed little circles on her stomach where it lay Kai almost unconscious of the motion. He leaned forward to press a soft kiss to her nose and before he knew it he was asleep.

--

Kai woke up the next morning to a armful of giggling girls. Well, more like being fucking John Cena-ed into his bed by two giggling girls. A freshly showered Y/n and his younger sister had decided to wake him upon by jumping on him and Kai couldn't help but grin up at them both. He pushed Y/n off of him and onto the floor as carefully as possible and snatched up his little sister to tickle her for a few minutes before sending her running out of his room with the threat of an all out tickle war.

Y/n was still in the floor where he left her and Kai swore he saw her eyes sparkle up at him from where she lay in a ray of sun let in by his curtains.

"So, Mr. National Sensation, what're we doing today?"

"National Sensation?" he crawled out of his bed to lay down next to her. Kai turned his head in her direction to look her in the eyes with a confused expression.

"Are you kidding me? Uh, hello? K-Pop star? Twitter loves you."
Kai groaned, "Why do I feel like you'd be the type to troll MOAs just to get them mad?"

"Maybe cuz I do?" She admitted somewhat sheepish.

"Really, Y/n?!" Kai couldn't keep the laugh out of his sentence.

"Hey, I have to entertain myself somehow when you aren't here. Besides I don't even really say stuff THAT bad about your little boy group. In fact most of your fanbase probably thinks I'm part of it because I honestly just troll YOU and call them clowns. Besides I know enough about your music and stuff. " She giggled at his exasperated look.

He rolled his eyes and adjusted so that his head was resting on her stomach. her hand immediately went down to his hair to pet it out of habit. They stayed quiet for maybe five minutes just enjoying the warmth from the rays of sun that shone through the window. Kai resumed the rhythm of rubbing he had started on her stomach the night before in the companionable silence. Suddenly something hit him that she said earlier.

"Y/n?"

"Hmm?" she mumbled softly still running her hand through his hair. He sat up moving her hand from his hair to hold it. She opened her eyes at that sensing the somewhat serious undertone of his action. He leaned over her, the hand that wasn't holding her hand resting on the opposite side of her body from where he lay. Their eyes met and he looked seriously into them, something tender there.

"...you listen to my music?" At the question she turned pink and glanced away. The situation felt all too raw.

"Of course, Kai. Why wouldn't I?"

"Well...I don't know? I just didn't think you'd want to hear my voice...I'm kind of embarrassed now."

"Embarassed?? Kai, why would you be embarrassed? I've told you this before but maybe you didn't understand me fully, " she reached out to cup his face with one hand, "Kai, you're voice is so beautiful. I genuinely love hearing you sing, your voice is always so pretty and gentle it makes me smile all the time. It also helps to listen to your music when I'm studying or even sad because when I can't call or see you, it just helps to know I can hear you immortalized forever in the songs you make."

Kai stared at her speechless. She flushed so red that he was sure that if he were to touch her cheeks they would be hot to the touch. But her cheeks weren't his main focus at all. His eyes flicked to her lips that glistened a little right after her sweet little rant about his music. He wanted to kiss her so bad. Just to show all the things he had never been able to say before because of nerves. Kai watched as her own eyes watched his. He swore he tried to keep his eyes trained on hers but at the last second the urge to get one last look at her lips won. His eyes flicked once more to the soft pink lips. And once he met her eyes again he knew that she knew exactly what he wanted and what he'd been looking at.

He watched as her eyes did the same almost as if she was mocking his action to tease him. He leaned down eyes watching her for any sign of discomfort or uncertainty. He saw none. He saw her eyes close and in turn his did. Her felt her breath gently blow over his lips and then-

"KAI KAMAL! I SWEAR TO GOD!"

They flew apart. Their eyes met, Kai's eyes wide and Y/n's confused. The weight of the situation washed over his body and his cheeks flushed so hot he was sure they were on fire.

"I, um," Kai stuttered eloquently, "I should, go see what that is about." Y/n nodded somewhat lost looking.

Kai stumbled to his feet to rush downstairs only to get an earful from Lea about leaving the toilet seat up. He dropped it down and Lea pushed him out of the bathroom. The door whooshed shut behind him and he just whirled around to drop his head rather harshly into the wall directly beside it. Kai couldn't help berating himself at his stupidity. What he didn't see that happened in his room directly above where he stood below, was Y/n who also dropped her head back against the wall cursing herself for falling into such a situation so easy.

--

Almost directly after the situation Kai's parents informed him that this Christmas they wanted to try going to look at lights around different neighborhoods. It was supposed to be pretty clear of rain tonight because of the big storm the previous night. So when he entered the his bedroom again and saw Y/n he invited her just as his parents had said to. Hehad avoided looking at her face the whole time.

"Actually Kai, I have to go soon. My mom was pretty upset and worried that I didn't text her last night before I passed out over here so she's gonna want to see me before I go anywhere agsin. " her answer left an odd stinging sensation in his heart, "I'll ask though for sure." And when she went to hug him before she left he dodged it. Her pretended not to see the hurt that flickered in her eyes as she turned and walked toward her mom's waiting car.

And if Kai cried in his room afterward no one would know but his pillow and bedsheets.

--

Y/n was at first really excited to see Kai. Hell, part of her still was, but she didn't want to pretend that her rejected hug didn't hurt even the littlest bit. Kai hadn't ever turned down a hug from her and the fact that the stupid almost kiss that could've been easily avoided was the thing that caused it made her mad beyond belief. Her mom attempted to get her to talk on the rise home from his house but all Y/n could focus on was the way her chest hurt and the stinging behind her eyes. She ended up near the end of the ride explaining about how the night before she was going to text her mom and ask to stay over but work had killed and she had passed out before they even hit the twelve o' clock mark that they usually stayed up to at their sleepovers. She didn't ask her mom about going to see lights with the Huenings, but still texted Kai that she couldn't go. It was only later that she found out that his parents had rescheduled the date for her.

They didn't talk for two days after the stupid ass kiss and by then it was Christmas Eve Eve and of course Y/n worked that day. But it wasn't like she did a very good job the only thing her mind was fully thinking about was Hyuka. His pretty brown eyes, his wide smile, soft hair, his hugs...

Her coworkers seemed to notice that she wasn't having a very good day so this time it was her that got to go him early while that closed home. As she exited the shop her eyes landed on one of the last(the only?) person she wanted to see. Kai stood out in front of his dad's big truck the sun setting behind him creating something of a halo around his head. To make matters worse he stood before her wearing the fluffiest coat that she just KNEW would make one of his hugs feel absolutely heavenly. She looked in the car behind him and saw his whole family inside. By then she knew that she probably didn't have a choice as to what was happening in this moment and if the grimace on Kai's face was anything to go by he didn't either.

"What's going on Kai?" Her voice came out more scathing than she intended but she refused to fix it. He deserved that at least.
"Your mom didn't tell you?"

Oh of course her mother was involved.

"No, care to enlighten me?"

"My parents rescheduled the light show thing for today so that you could go and they set it up with your mom do that we would.pick you up after work and take you with us."

"Oh," was all she said.

There was an uncomfortable silence between the two for a second before Kai started to speak.

"Listen Y/n about what happened a few days ago-"

"Save it Kai." Y/n interrupted him, something ugly settling in her stomach just at the mention of it.

"We need to talk about it sometime!"

"And what you want to do that here?!"

They both went silent and Kai shook his head looking away, "...no, but I'm not leaving this goddamn island before we figure it out because I'm not going to lose you over something as stupid as that."

Something in her heart broke at that and she just walked forward to hop inside the car. Kai ended up riding in the back seat with his little sister and Y/n sat next to Lea.

--

Lea was happy to spend time Kai, Y/n and the rest of her family really, but she was going to go insane if she had to endure one more second of this stupid game of avoidance Kai and Y/n were playing. She didn't know what the hell happened to make the two act like they were acting but she was going to fix it tonight even if that meant locking them in a closet together for a few days.

Kai sat behind Lea in the back on his phone, his face stone cold and devoid of emotion. Y/n next to her shivering in her short sleeved shirt that was part of her work uniform. Lea sighed audibly her mind working up a scheme. After a moment of thinking a singular synapse must've fired in her brain because the most fool proof plan ever broke through the fog clouding her mind. If Kai didn't have a wingman then she would have to step up.

"Y/n Are you cold? You're shivering!"

"N-no, I'm okay Lea."

Lea took her hand, "Oh you liar! Your hands are ice cubes!"

"I don't have an extra coat but Kai has a pretty warm jacket under his big fluffy coat. Kai would you give Y/n y out jacket? She's super cold. "
Lea put.I'm her most innocent voice and her sweetest smile. Kai hesitated briefly but seeing the way Y/n shivered he quickly took off his big coat and gave her his jacket.

Lea opened her mouth to continue and say how she wanted to switch with Kai because she was getting cold herself but an even better opportunity presented itself. Let's dad spoke.

"Look kiddos! Lights!" The street in front of them was filled with twinkling lights and beautiful displays of Christmas scenes with snowmen and once house even had a Christmas show projected up on the side of their house.
Lea's dad pulled over to the side of the road and turned around. To face them from the front seat.

"I put some blankets in the back of the truck I figured you older kids might want to go back there to look at the lights without the car getting in the way?"
Lea's eyes lit up , quickly speaking before the other two teens could get out a word, "I'm okay dad, but Kai and Y/n can go without me. I wanted to show lil sis the lights anyway!"

"Okay! Well you kids have fun!" her dad spoke again, "There are three big blankets out there so you should be plenty warm!"
Lea got out of the car so that Kai and Y/n could climb out watching as the two glanced at each other helplessly. Lea winked at the two and waved before hopping back inside the truck and pulling her sister in her lap.

--

Kai felt something twist at the prospect of talking to Y/n after the rejected hug but as he'd said earlier. It needed to be talked about. They both climbed up into the back Kai's arms lightly dreading her hips as she climbed up from where the tire was so that they didn't have to open the back. He felt electricity shoot up from his fingertips just at the simple and gentle touch, and Kai would like to believe the little shiver she gave afterward wasn't because of the breeze. He climbed up directly after and sat down next to her before knocking on the little window in the back to signal that they were okay to start moving.

They were silent for a second after the truck jerked forward and Kai was hyperaware of the maybe two inches of space separating the it bodies. If felt wrong to be that far away from her when sitting like this. They should be hip to hip. He should be holding her not avoiding her and rejecting her hugs. He watched her hands fiddle eight themsleves in her lap. He should be holding them. All of it was constant "should haves", he hated it. He wanted this fixed. He opened his mouth too speak but right then she got to it first.

"Why, " she swallowed around the lump in her thoat, "Why didn't you hug me?" Her voice sounded meek and scared and Kai very nearly recoiled at the knowledge that he did that to her, made her sound like that. He saw her squeeze her eyes shut and wince as if she had regretted the question right after she asked it. However something else more concerning happened during her wince. A tear rolled down her cheek he wasn't even sure if it was just residual water in her eyes from the cold temperature or if it was truely just repressed emotion or if she actually was crying.

His response however was immediate. His own eyes blurred and then he was speaking.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I-I just freaked out. I've loved you for so long and after the stupid almost kiss thing I freaked out, I thought I went to far or that you didn't want it or that you'd regret it and I just couldn't bring myself to hug you and risk messing all of it up again. I'm so stupid. I shouldn't have even initiated it in the first place. Nothing is worth losing my best friend over. Losing you over. Please don't leave me, Y/n."

The only sound for the next second was the sound of Kai's shakey breaths and the faing Christmas music playing from inside the truck. Kai clenched his eyes shut and was almost thrown off the side of the truck in surprise at the unseen motion of Y/n flinging her arms around him in a hug. Her arms were wrapped tight around his shoulders her legs twisted haphazardly over his lap. She clung to him so tightly that he felt his breath restrict a little. Despite that Kai felt that he could breath better now than he could in the past forty-eight hours. He wrapped his arms around her just as tightly as she did him. His ears were faintly ringing and he was certain he could never feel this euphoric in his life ever again. Just the feeling of wrapping her up in his arms again after so much painful space being between them was like going form walking with weights on your feet to swimming. He was vaguely aware of her shaking in his arms and he want sure if she was laughing or crying. Kai knew his own cheeks were wet.
r She pulled away from his arms, still sitting in his lap to cup his face with both hands. She looked straight into his eyes something so tender and raw shone in her eyes that he swore it hurt to look at them. I

"I love you too. I do, I love you Huening Kai." And Kai was wrong when he said he couldn't ever feel more euphoric in his life because when they kissed he swore stars exploded behind his closed eyelids and within his heart. How did it still somehow hurt? Was love supposed to burn like this? Because everywhere she touched let little trails of fire boiling down to his blood. Kai decided if he was going to die this would be a fine way to go. Y/n in his arms glowing beneath the arches of pretty Christmas lights.