Archive of Our Own ^beta

“I'm here,” Hyunjin announces as he walks into the store front proper, only to find his friends, Jisung and Felix, huddled together by the counter and seemingly in deep discussion about something. “Guys—?” he calls out, in order to catch their attention.

He’s five minutes late for his shift, but lucky for him, it doesn’t seem like the store is particularly busy that morning. 

“Oh, hey, Hyunjinnie!” Felix looks up, his eyes lighting up while a wide grin splits across his cheeks.

“Yo.” Jisung, meanwhile, cooly nods at him while giving him a three finger salute.

After graduating from university, Hyunjin started working full-time at Paws & Play, a pet goods store connected to a small, family run veterinary clinic located just next door. It isn’t exactly the best use of his degree in Philosophy, but the job market hasn’t been great recently, especially for someone with such abstract expertise. He always figured he would go into the academe—maybe enroll in graduate studies at the best least. It really doesn't seem practical at the moment, though. For now at least he’s making enough money for rent.

“Have we had customers?” Hyunjin asks, walking around the counter so he could deposit his things there. “You’re here early,” he adds with a nod towards Felix – all three of them are friends from their years in university, but Felix doesn’t really work at the store with them.

“Some guy was here earlier, asking what to feed his bird,” Jisung explains with a shrug. “And Chan dropped by first thing in the morning for his weekly stash of fish food.”

“And I came with Chan,” Felix explains. “We had breakfast, and then I just decided to stick around.”

“Ah.” Hyunjin nods; it’s nothing new. Felix likes hanging out with them because he usually doesn’t have anything to do. Save for a few freelance commissions here and there, Felix is unemployed and barely makes use of his degree in multimedia arts — he’s taking a ‘break’ to try and figure out what he really wants to do with his life, is his very privileged excuse. He’s also quite frugal however, at least when it comes to personal luxuries, so the monthly stipend that his parents send him from Australia manages to go a long way.

A lot of the time, he hangs out with Hyunjin and Jisung at the store, sometimes even helping out for free when they actually have customers. Most days, though, he's just there to keep them company — mostly discussing and encouraging Jisung's bright (but oftentimes questionable) ideas for his YouTube channel (which actually boasts a pretty decent 9,000+ subs) and generally, in Hyunjin's personal opinion, just lighting up their days.

“So, you know how Channie-hyung recently decided to try out brewing his own beer, right?” Jisung relays to Hyunjin, who gets pulled out of his thoughts; he nods as acknowledgment.

“Yeah—isn't that why he's throwing a little party this weekend? So he can get us to taste test his pale ale?” Hyunjin answers, trying to recall the Facebook invite he'd seen himself tagged in the night before; he makes a mental note to RSVP to that later.

“Uh-huh,” Jisung nods, absent-mindedly twirling around in his stool. “Felix was just telling me that he wants to make use of all the spent grain Chan now has.”

Hyunjin throws both of them a confused look; he knows nothing about brewing beer and he has no idea what Jisung means.

“Yeah!” Felix happily chimes in. “Throwing all that away would be such a waste—and I found a few recipes online that uses spent grain to make dog treats.”

Hyunjin lights up at that. “That's cool! Kkami really liked those cookies you made for him on his last birthday.”

“You made cookies for a dog?” Jisung looks at Felix, somewhat bewildered.

“It was his birthday!” Felix answers, earnest and completely without any trace of defensiveness.

“And they tasted great,” Hyunjin chimes in. “Kkami really enjoyed them.”

Felix beams proudly. “Well, maybe Kkami would love these new ones too,” he suggests.

“Sure, Kkami will willingly taste test everything for you. They'll be treats for him,” Hyunjin agrees wholeheartedly.

“Hey, maybe we can sell them for you here,” Jisung suggests. “It'd be a way to make some extra cash!”

“You think?” Felix looks tentative but interested. “I'm not sure if anything I make is good enough to make money off of...”

“Oh, please!” Jisung scoffs. “Your brownies and your chocolate chip cookies are the best! So I'm sure whatever version you make for dogs will more than cut it.”

“I can attest to that!” Hyunjin agrees. “Besides, you've spent so much of the months since graduation perfecting your baking skills, Lix — might as well make some extra money from it.”

“I... suppose you're right,” Felix hums, nodding slowly. “You think I can sell them here?”

Jisung nods excitedly. “I'm sure Minho-hyung will agree to it!”

Hyunjin snorts; Minho is their manager — the very filial son of the Veterinarian next door, whose family also owned the pet store they all work at. He also happens to have a hard time saying no to Jisung, even though he always scoffs and threatens to give Hyunjin a noogie whenever he even so much as alludes to this weakness of his.

“Well, maybe I should try making one batch first — Kkami can test them for me!” Felix looks happy and excited. “And if it's a success... well. Channie-hyung seems keen on brewing more beer, so I'd at least have all that spent grain to use.”

Fridays and Sundays are Hyunjin's days off, and because his friends are either busy at work (Jisung, who takes his days off on Saturdays and Mondays), or busy with med school (Seungmin, who seems to never actually have days off recently), he usually ends up staying in and binge-watching dramas on his Netflix queue. That Friday, however, Felix makes a passing mention in their Kakao group chat that he plans on making a test batch of dog treats, and Hyunjin is quick to invite himself along.

“I think I've watched everything that looks good on Netflix,” is his excuse; truthfully, he just wants to spend some time outside of his sad little studio apartment. Spending it with a friend like Felix is just the special cherry on top.

“Okay!” Felix sends several excited looking stickers in succession, which makes Hyunjin giggle. Definitely the special cherry on top, because Felix always makes everything better.

Felix lives in a two bedroom apartment with Chan that's only a little over a half hour away from where Hyunjin lives. Chan, like every other responsible, contributing member of society, is of course at work on a Friday.

“Okay, Master Chef!” Hyunjin greets Felix when the latter lets him into the house; he eagerly follows his friend to the living room, rubbing his hands with glee. “Tell me how I can help!”

“Well, I already got out the ingredients,” Felix tells him, gesturing at the kitchen countertop where (presumably) everything they need to for making homemade dog treats is already laid out. Hyunjin has watched Felix bake before, but he has never really actually helped outside of testing the finished product.

“Is this the grain from the beer?” he asks, picking up a plastic container filled with soaked mush. He lifts it to his nose, pausing as he considers the smell. “That... smells milder than I would have imagined,” he comments after a couple of seconds.

Felix laughs. “That was from last weekend's brew, and I had to keep them in the fridge,” he explains as he puts on an apron. It's a bright yellow one, with daisy print all over — coincidentally, a joint gift from Hyunjin and Jisung during Felix's last birthday. “The scent was stronger when it was fresh.”

Hyunjin places the container back down, and simply nods mutely.

Felix rolls his sleeves up and grins at Hyunjin. “This is the fun part,” he explains as he mixes all the pre-measured ingredients together in a big bowl; Hyunjin simply perches on top of one of the kitchen stools so he can get a better look at his friend’s process.

All of the spent grain is mixed with several cups of flour, eggs and a heaping glop of peanut butter. 

“You just kind of mix it all together,” Felix says, glancing at Hyunjin who can’t help but scoop out a spoonful of peanut butter directly from the jar so he can snack on it.

He smiles sheepishly at being caught, only to follow along when Felix only laughs at him; the deep richness of his laughter is contagious — the kind of sound that makes one happy to have someone as merry as Felix in their life. Funny enough, Hyunjin had been quite wary of him when they had first met.

Seungmin, who was Hyunjin’s best friend in high school, was the one to introduce Felix to him. They were classmates in a Communications elective that Seungmin had taken during freshman year, and the two of them had hit it off so well that for a brief moment, Hyunjin felt like Felix had been infringing on his role as Seungmin’s best friend. But that petty bitterness hadn't really lasted long, after all, Felix is not someone that's easy to be mad at.

Despite his Korean roots, Felix had been born and bred in Australia. Going to study in Seoul was his way of connecting with his cultural roots; he was quite eager to make new friends, but also more than careful not to offend. For someone like Hyunjin who was — is — always conscious about how people view him, that side of Felix was something he quickly related to, and it wasn't long before the two of them were able to create their own bond outside of Seungmin.

These days, especially with Seungmin busy with med school, and with most of his free time allotted to his boyfriend, Changbin, Hyunjin is pretty sure he and Felix spend more time together than either of them do with Seungmin. It's nothing to complain about; it was natural that after graduating, their friend group don't see each other as much as they did when they all still attended the same university.

“Have you tried Chan-hyung's beer?” Hyunjin asks; thinking of his friends reminded him that he's going to see most of them the next evening, thanks to Chan's little get together.

“Not yet!” Felix shakes his head; he's busy kneading all the ingredients in the bowl together and Hyunjin is fascinated by the way that it looks less like a squishy mess now and more like actual dough. “I guess I'm going to have a taste at the same time as everyone else.”

“I can't wait to see everyone,” Hyunjin chimes in. “Jeongin messaged me last night—I guess even he's going to make an appearance.”

“Yeah! Seungminnie, and Changbin-hyung too!” Felix happily adds. His hands finally pause from whatever they're doing with the dough, and he looks up at Hyunjin. “ Dog treats are much simpler than actual human treats,” he explains, naturally slipping into his native English tongue. “Now we just have to roll them flat and shape them with cookie cutters.”

Hyunjin nods; something about Felix's accent has always fascinated him — there was even a time when he had unconsciously started copying it whenever he would speak in English. Mixed with Felix's obvious enthusiasm for what he's doing, Hyunjin finds himself just staring and nodding along, listening intently as Felix rattles on and on about what he's doing. His face is powdered with flour here and there, and at one point Hyunjin reaches over to try and wipe some off from Felix's forehead — only for him to burst into uncontrollable laughter when that does nothing but spread out the flour more.

Felix lets Hyunjin mold the dog treats — not exactly the hardest step in the process, and as they wait for the cookies to bake, Hyunjin takes the lead in cleaning up.

“It's the least I could do,” he insists, snatching a dish rag right out of Felix's hands; the latter gawks in surprise, and Hyunjin laughs at him. In the end, because Felix is Felix, and Hyunjin is Hyunjin — they both refuse to back down on cleaning duty and the two of them end up washing bowls and dishes side by side over the kitchen sink.

It's a nice afternoon overall; strangely domestic in a very comfortable way. Hyunjin comes out of it happier, and feeling way more productive than he would have if he spent his time at home binge watching Hotel de Luna for the third time.

The next day, Felix shows up at the pet goods store again right before Jisung and Hyunjin's overlapping lunch break. He's there with homemade sandwiches for both of them.

“I made human food this time!” he announces happily, as he shares with him. “Is Minho-hyung around? There's one for him, too.”

“He's in the clinic today,” Jisung answers. “The receptionist called sick at the last minute, so he's filling in.”

Hyunjin, hungry because he hadn't had breakfast earlier that day, is already unwrapping his sandwich. On Saturdays, he and Jisung get lunch at the same time because Minho is usually around to take over at the counter, but because the older male obviously can't that day, the plan was for one of them to get ready-to-eat meals at the GS25 down the street and just eat inside the store. Felix's homemade lunch came at perfect timing, and Hyunjin can't help but think that Felix is truly an angel sent from heaven above.

“This smells good,” Hyunjin comments after he takes his first happy bite. “Which reminds me—I fed Kkami a couple of the treats we made yesterday!”

“Oh! Did he enjoy them?” Felix asks, his eyes twinkling with curiosity.

Hyunjin hums as he chews his food. “I personally liked the ones you made before—the ones for his birthday? I personally liked those better—but Kkami really went crazy for these new ones!”

Before Felix could respond, Jisung holds up a hand, eyes bulging open as they travel from Hyunjin, to Felix, then back to Hyunjin again. “Hold up.” He blinks. “You personally liked—what? Did you eat dog treats?!”

Hyunjin frowns at the tone that Jisung is using. “What? Only the best for my Kkami — besides, dog treats aren't inedible for humans!”

Jisung keeps giving him a weird look, while Felix tries to break the tension with a hearty chuckle. “Well, honestly, the last time—those were basically just pumpkin peanut butter cookies, so it figures that you'd enjoy them more!”

“Yeah.” Hyunjin nods as he takes another bite off his sandwich. “What Felix said.”

Jisung snorts. “This would make for a good YouTube video,” he announces; he even puts his sandwich down and gestures an imaginary marquee in front of him. “PRETTY BOY EATS DOG FOOD — NOT CLICKBAIT!”

“Not dog food!” Hyunjin argues. “Dog treats!”

Jisung cackles and shakes his head. “Same difference!”

Hyunjin would argue some more, but he notices that Felix is watching both of them with peculiar amusement, and he feels warmth spreading across his cheeks.

“Whatever,” he grumbles, not really wanting to fight anymore; Jisung has always had a way of getting under his skin, and even though all of their friends are used to it by now, Felix included, he's really trying his best to be the type of person who isn't riled up so easily.

“Guys, guys!” Felix smiles at both of them. “Don't fight,” he implores. “Here,” he adds, placing a plastic container filled with cookies in between the two of them. “I'm gonna go visit Minho-hyung next door, so I can give him lunch, but I had a lot of peanut butter left, so i made some more cookies last night after Hyunjin left. Stop bickering, though, okay?”

Even Jisung falls silent after that. Felix is too nice — too pure for the world, that it never sits well with anyone to disagree whenever he asks something of any of them.

“I was just kidding around,” Jisung explains, sincere in his tone, and with that, Felix gives them both a satisfied smile.

Hyunjin and Jisung are left nibbling away their respective meals as they both watch Felix saunter off and out of the store — presumably on his way to the vet clinic next door so he can spread more of his special brand of cheer.

“If you stare harder that boy is gonna melt,” Jisung comments suddenly, and Hyunjin's attention is immediately pulled away from Felix's exiting figure.

“What, huh—?” Hyunjin frowns as he turns to his friend; he's not sure if he understood Jisung's words correctly.

Jisung snorts. “Did you have fun on your little baking date with your crush yesterday, hm, Hyunjinnie?” Teasingly, he reaches over and tickles Hyunjin's chin, which has the latter recoiling and leaning away immediately.

“Oy, stop that!” he snarls, and swats Jisung's hand away; typical of him, Jisung's only reaction is to laugh. “What are you talking about?”

“I'm talking about your little date with Lix yesterday,” Jisung says matter-of-factly.

“It wasn't a date.” Hyunjin frowns. “I was bored at home, and he mentioned trying out his dog treat recipe—I thought I could help.”

“Yes, because you're supper skilled in the kitchen,” Jisung agrees cheekily. “As true as the fact that you don't have a crush on Felix, right?”

“Jisung.” Hyunjin shakes his head; he wants to argue. He doesn't have a crush on Felix, he wants to say. He has no idea why Jisung is pulling these things out of thin air. The denial feels heavy on his tongue, however, and suddenly he feels bothered.

A crush? On Felix? It's ridiculous, right? Felix is one of his best friends — second only to Seungmin, if he was asked to rank who he's closest with among his friends, so how could he have a crush on him?

Jisung, as usual, looks so smug — so sure of himself; this is why Hyunjin spent most of freshman year wanting to punch the living daylights out of him, but he's long ago learned that Jisung is never the type to be malicious. He always looks sure, because most of the time, he's actually... right.

Suddenly, Hyunjin feels his head throbbing. Jisung isn't actually always right because no one is always right — and surely this is just one of those few times that he's mistaken.

Or, more likely, one of the times that Jisung is pulling his leg.

Hyunjin gives him a look, which Jisung returns with a closed mouth smile. He's already back to finishing his sandwich, not laughing as if he was just joking earlier.

Jisung's words — Jisung's allegations regarding his assumed feelings for Felix still haunts Hyunjin later that evening when it's time for Chan's much anticipated party.

He goes home after he clocks out of work so he can shower and change, but he heads to Felix and Chan's place accompanied by Jisung and Minho anyway, because Jisung had scored a ride with Minho, and in turn promised Hyunjin he can go with them. In the car, it's easy to push through thoughts of his supposed crush to the back of his mind because Jisung and Minho are constantly bickering (mostly about Jisung's control of the music playlist, but for a good fifteen minutes they had argued about whether or not Jisung has the right to rename an imaginary pet turtle that a hypothetical great uncle may or may not leave him in his will), and they never fail to be entertaining to Hyunjin.

And when they arrive at Felix and Chan's, the first person he sees is Seungmin when the latter opens the door; he's overjoyed to see his best friend, because even though they keep regular contact through Kakao, it's been two weeks since they actually saw each other in person , and Hyunjin can't help himself when he practically throws himself onto Seungmin, wrapping his arms around his friend and squeezing him tightly.

“Okay,” Seungmin chuckles, as he loosely returns the gesture, calmly rubbing Hyunjin's back. “I missed you too,” he teases, and Hyunjin laughs, giving him one last squeeze before pulling away.

“For a second there, I thought you were gonna squeeze the life out of my boyfriend,” Changbin comments from behind Seungmin, and Hyunjin scoffs even as he gives Changbin a hug as well.

“Here for the free booze!” Jisung announces, bulldozing right past them, followed by Minho who gives Seungmin and Changbin nods of acknowledgement in greeting.

Hyunjin follows them all into the living room — and he surprises even himself when his breath hitches at the first sight of Felix, who is seated on the couch next to Jeongin, looking completely focused, bottom lip trapped between his teeth, and eyes slightly squinted, as the youngest of their friend group shows him something on his phone. He isn't even dressed or made up differently than usual — sure, his hair is brushed up, styled away from his face, leaving his forehead and the wealth of freckles that decorate his cheeks free to be fully displayed, but Hyunjin has seen him like that plenty of times before.

“They're here!” Changbin is the one who announces their arrival, and both Jeongin and Felix look up at the same time.

“Hello friends,” Jisung readily saunters over to the long couch and squeezes himself between Jeongin and Felix.

Minho, meanwhile, unceremoniously drops down on the cozy looking bean bag right at his foot, while Seungmin and Changbin move across the room to share the love seat that's located over there. Hyunjin feels awkward because he's the only one left standing — even more so when Chan appears, presumably from the kitchen, carrying a tray stacked with finger food, and gives him a puzzled look.

“Hey mate, go take a seat,” Chan tells him. “You're no stranger here.”

Felix looks up while reaching for an onion ring from the food stack Chan just served them all; he grins and taps Jisung on the knee before gesturing for him and Jeongin to make room. “Over here, Hyunjinnie!” he calls out, patting the tiny free space next to him, and Jisung's words from earlier push their way to the forefront of his thoughts.

As if to torture him more, Jisung himself looks up at him, lips curved into a knowing smirk, and Hyunjin automatically feels his face grow warm. Minho playfully slaps the back of his calf, and when Hyunjin looks down at him, a teasing expression adorns the older male's face as well.

“Over there, Hyunjinnie~" Minho tells him, in a tone that's almost taunting. “Go and take a seat!”

Hyunjin finds himself tongue tied, but he does walk towards the couch so he can position himself at the end, right next to Felix. It's a bit crowded, and as he tries to adjust his position, his elbow accidentally digs into Felix's side.

“Sorry,” he whispers, but Felix just smiles.

“It's cool,” he assures Hyunjin; but then he gets up on his feet anyway. “Actually, I should go and help hyung bring out the rest of the food—and of course, the drinks!”

Hyunjin follows him with his eyes as Felix disappears into the kitchen after Chan; he barely notices the couch dip next to him, at least until Jisung slings an arm around his shoulder.

“Dude.” Jisung snickers, poking the corner of his mouth and pushing it upwards. “Stop frowning too hard, Lixie'll be back.”

Hyunjin scoffs and deliberately elbows Jisung. “Fuck off,” he grumbles.

Jisung, annoyingly, but very characteristically, just laughs in response.

The rest of the night is long, but in the best way possible. When Felix comes back, he simply sits at the foot of the couch, right in front of Hyunjin and Jisung. It isn't long before everyone is talking over one another as they catch each other up on the state of their respective lives; it's always like this with them. Since graduating university, they aren't really able to get together with all of them very often, but when they do, it's always as if no time has passed.

Seungmin complains about med school hours, and Changbin reminds him that's why they're there with friends — to unwind. Jisung talks about a customer who came in with their shihtzu that shat itself right in the store — only for the dog to promptly eat it's own fecal matter in the next five minutes, not even giving Jisung an excuse to sell the owner doggy bags. And then he talks about how many views he thinks that incident could have gotten if he'd managed to catch it on camera. Minho talks about putting in less hours at the pet goods store, and taking more internship hours at the clinic, because he's at that stage of his veterinary medicine education, while Jeongin talks about being paired with the girl he likes for a mini thesis, and overall, no one really runs out of things to talk about.

They're served with Chan's homebrewed ale, which, Hyunjin is surprised to like as much as he does — he normally isn't a big fan of beer, preferring sake or rice wine when he goes out drinking. Chan's brew has a certain sweetness to it that appeals to him, however, and he finds that he has to consciously pace himself so that he doesn't get too drunk on it. The rest of his friends don't seem to hold back, especially after Chan and Felix assure them that they're all welcome to spend the night over, just like they always used to do when they were all still in school. Even Seungmin is quite sloshed by the end of the night, if the way he shamelessly drapes himself over his boyfriend on the love seat is any indication. Hyunjin has known Seungmin for over ten years, and his friend has never been one for such public displays of affection. It makes him giggle, but it also makes him re-evaluate his own drunken state.

With Jisung's accusations still making round trips in his head, he's scared that he's going to end up acting on them so he pulls himself together and manages to stumble his way out into the balcony for some open night air. That usually helps him sober down whenever he's had too much alcohol.

“Hey, mate!” Hyunjin is in the middle of letting his thoughts get away from him, the faint sparkling of the stars in the sky replacing his thoughts of Felix with a broken rendition of twinkle, twinkle little star, when Felix himself surprises him by suddenly hugging him from behind.

All that effort at steering his thoughts away from his freckled friend, gone, just like that.

“Jesus, Lix!” Hyunjin laughs awkwardly, hand clutching at his chest; if his ears aren't deceiving him, then his words are a little slurred. He can't be sure because his perception is a little fuzzy in general — then again, his brain seems to be working just fine; seems to be working overtime, as usual. “You almost gave me a heart attack,” he mutters softly.

“Sorry—” Felix replies, but he doesn't pull away at all. “You smell really nice,” he even adds, boldly nuzzling the back of Hyunjin's neck in a very ticklish way, that it makes the latter giggle. “Like human Downy.”

Felix has always been very affectionate — the most affectionate one in the group, especially when it came to the physical type of affection. This is always more apparent when he's had a bit of alcohol in his system, so the way he's cozying up to Hyunjin isn't really anything new. However, considering how much Hyunjin has been thinking of him all day, Felix's snuggly proximity suddenly has him feeling oversensitive.

“Lixie,” he starts, his breath needlessly hitching; he doesn't know what he wants to say, and the way Felix hum against the skin on the back of his neck only gives him more reason to pause.

“Yeah?” The other boy answers, and Hyunjin feels himself exhale shakily; suddenly he's feeling a lot more sober now.

“Nothing,” Hyunjin mumbles. “You're warm,” he finds himself adding — something's wrong with his brain to mouth filter, so maybe the alcohol is still working it's magic in his system.

His works make Felix giggle, and in the process his hold on Hyunjin tightens; his heart is rapidly pitter pattering against his ribcage and Hyunjin wonders if Felix can feel as much. He allows laughter to bloom from the pit of his stomach — he hopes their combined mirth is able to drown out the thundering in his chest.

Fuck, he thinks. Jisung just might be right about his stupid crush after all. 

The following Friday, Felix invites him over again to bake more dog treats.

Over the course of the week, Hyunjin saw him a total of two times — once when Felix had dropped by at work again, very briefly, just there to drop off lunch for his friends, and once more when he had picked Jisung up because they had plans to film something for one of Jisung's vlogs. Both times, Hyunjin had just smiled and greeted him, while secretly relieved that he didn't have to spend more than ten minutes at a time with his friend.

Silly, but Hyunjin has always been the type to overthink everything, including his emotions — especially his emotions. Hyunjin isn't always particularly quick on the uptake; he isn't stupid but he isn't very bright either, and he knows as much so he has always put the work in. This is a good thing when it comes to things like school, and now, work — but it isn't a very good thing when it comes to more abstract things like feelings, especially if you're like Hyunjin who always feels things too much. He always ends up analyzing his own emotions far too much, and this is why he has never really had any successful long term relationships. His thoughts always end up getting the better of him, and in his experience, no one wants to be with someone who is far too analytical and far too sensitive at the same time.

To wit, the more Hyunjin stews over his own feelings, the more he drowns in them. By the time Felix messages him Thursday evening, asking if he would like to come over again that Friday, he has become far too sensitive about anything and everything that concerns his friend.

“If I say yes, will he realise that I like like him?” is the first thought that comes to mind. He's well aware that it's a ridiculous thought; he has known Felix for years, and all he has to do is act like he always does around him. Nothing should change just because he has been made aware that he has a crush on him. Then again, it's a crush that Hyunjin himself is clueless as to when it started, and because of that he can't help but overanalyze his own attitude towards Felix — if Jisung noticed, then surely he was obvious in some ways? Not to mention if Jisung noticed, how is he sure that no one else has?

Hyunjin thinks he now knows what people mean when they say that ignorance is bliss.

Still, the thought of spending another domestic afternoon with Felix and the giddy warmth that comes with it briefly wins over everything else, and that's how he once again finds himself in Felix's kitchen, attempting his very best to help as Felix bakes thrice the amount of dog treats he had the week before — apparently, he has been allowed to sell his goods out of Paws & Play, at least on a trial basis.

As before, Hyunjin's only role is to cut the dough using cookie cutters — Felix does everything else by himself.

“You're really good at this, Lix,” Hyunjin comments after Felix inserts the final tray of dog cookies into the oven. “Have you ever thought of—I don't know. Doing this for a living?”

Felix blinks at him, and he looks so adorable, with a sprinkling of flour not just on the tip of his nose, but also the corner of his lips. It's a bit distracting, really because Hyunjin can't help but fixate. As a result he has to focus energy on resisting the urge to reach over and dust his nose off — on fighting the temptation to lean in and kiss him, to lick the flour off his lips.

“Selling dog treats?” Felix asks, pulling Hyunjin out of his reverie.

He shakes his head. “Baking in general?” he clarifies, before shaking his head once more. “But generally — a job in the culinary arts. You're always feeding us, too — you should make us pay.”

Felix laughs. “But I like feeding you guys! I like cooking and experimenting with food, but it isn't fun just cooking for one — much more expensive too, so I might as well share.”

“Or you might as well make a living out of it,” Hyunjin urges him, only to almost regret it when Felix's lips curve into a downwards pout.

“I don't know — it doesn't feel right to ask for money. I'm not a professional or anything,” Felix says softly; he glances at the oven and then back at Hyunjin. “Even selling these feel like I'm cheating? Jisung was really insistent though, so I figured I could try.”

Hyunjin hums; he understands Felix's unease. They stem from his insecurities, which Hyunjin himself is in abundance of. He wants to tell Felix that he should try nevertheless — that he has nothing to lose if he makes an attempt to sell to people as well, and not just dogs, but he understands that someone else telling you to do something because it's alright, and it will be great, doesn't necessarily mean much if you don't feel that it is.

Still, he wants to try.

“Lix,” he starts, and the other male turns to face him. Their eyes meet and all of the words that Hyunjin had been trying to arrange in his head fall apart. “Can I kiss you?”

He surprises even himself at the question; his eyes widen, and he feels panic rise in chest. Fuck, he thinks — somehow, in the jumble of his own thoughts, that had been what made it to the forefront.

Felix stares at him blankly, and Hyunjin feels the heat rise up to his cheeks. He's about to take the words back — about to force out laughter, and pretend that they were nothing but a joke. An unfunny joke, one that clearly doesn't make sense, but hopefully loud, obnoxious laughter can make up for that. Before he can do that, Felix suddenly gives him a little nod.

He thinks that was a nod, anyway — it was so subtle, that it could easily be him misunderstanding and seeing something he wanted to see.

“Uh—” he starts, nose wrinkling as his brain scrambles to find words.

“Yes,” Felix voices out loud, and Hyunjin's heartbeat feels like it triples in speed. He wonders if this is what a heart attack feels like, and then he shakes the thought of because fuck, Felix just said yes, Hyunjin can kiss him, and he refuses to die before that happens.

It's wild — a week ago, Felix was nothing but a normal friend, and now he's in the business of inducing possible life ending heart attacks from him. He's also looking at Hyunjin, expectancy mirrored in his eyes, and it's right then that Hyunjin decides he truly has too many thoughts running through his head all at once.

So he takes a deep breath — and he lets go.

He exhales with clear determination, and then he reaches forward, grabbing Felix by the front knot of his kitchen apron and pulling him towards him. Felix blinks in surprise, and there are a lot of ways that someone like Hyunjin can interpret the subtle changes that pass over his expression in the matter of seconds, but for once, Hyunjin has decided to be a man of action rather than thought.

He kisses Felix.

Their mouths slot together, awkward at first; and then Felix places his hands on Hyunjin's waist, fingers grasping where his t-shirt falls against his body and Hyunjin takes that as a sign. He relaxes, and slowly moves his lips, deepening the kiss. Felix tastes like the peanut butter that he baked into the dog treats — the peanut butter that they'd both been mindlessly snacking on as they worked. Hyunjin would bet that he tastes similarly, but for now he'd rather taste it on Felix's lips, and Felix's tongue.

When they pull away for air, intrusive thoughts threaten to take over his mind again, but Felix smiles at him, sweetly, earnestly, and the second time around, he's the one who leans in and makes a move to continue where they left off.

They're still kissing when the oven dings, signaling that the dog cookies are done baking. Hyunjin almost doesn't hear it, but Felix is quick to pull away, sheepishness evident in his eyes. His cheeks are flushed, and his mouth is spit slick, lips puffy. The sight makes Hyunjin blush, but they just smile at each other.

Hyunjin simply helps Felix pack the dog treats afterwards, and even after Felix walks him to the door later when it's time for him to go home, neither of them mention what happened.

The fact that he just made out with his friend of 5 years — his friend that he recently realised he's attracted to — lends Hyunjin one night of great sleep. The day after, he wakes up with crushing unease — what the fuck just happened?

The thought consumes him the entire morning, his body practically moving on muscle memory as he eats breakfast (just a sandwich he bought from the convenience store the night before), and he showers for work.

Work.

When he arrives to open the store, Felix is already waiting there, sitting by the curbside. Hyunjin flushes at the thought that Felix was waiting for him — perhaps to finally talk about what went on the day before. And then he notices the large tote bag that Felix is carrying and he remembers; his friend is there because he's going to be handing out samples of his dog treats to their customers. It's a simple marketing idea that Changbin, who works at an advertising firm, had suggested he do; it made sense because people wouldn't have reason to buy product they haven't tested.

“Hey!” Felix greets him, practically bouncing on the balls of his feet with clear excitement.

“You're early,” Hyunjin comments as he opens the store; when he pushes the door open, he gestures for Felix to go on ahead of him.

It's going to be a long morning, he thinks. Saturday is Jisung's day off, which means Hyunjin is going to be alone with Felix — he wonders if that means he should bring up what happened yesterday. Scratch that, he knows he should, but as usual, words fail him.

He sighs and starts setting up behind the counter; from the corner of his eye, he observes Felix getting ready as well, laying out his neatly packed dog treats on a shelf that Minho and his family had set aside for him. He looks happy and eager, and his entire demeanor makes Hyunjin smile.

“Hey, Lix—” he starts, at the exact same time that Felix calls back to him, “Hyunjin—”

They both laugh, and Hyunjin gestures for him to go first.

“Minho-hyung told me I should try handing these out next door in the afternoon,” he explains; that makes sense — the veterinary clinic doesn't really open until one in the afternoon during weekends. “So I'll get out of your hair soon enough!”

“My hair—?” Hyunjin glances at him, perplexed. “It's okay, I don't mind you being around here—but I guess it makes more sense to give out freebies at the clinic. Gives them more reason to drop by here when they want to buy your goods.”

“Oh, that's—” Felix nods, a happy smile forming on his lips. “That's true—” he pauses, and looks up at Hyunjin, pretty lashes framing his big eyes in a way that almost distracts Hyunjin. “Hey, Hyunjin, about yesterday,” Felix starts, and that easily gathers all of Hyunjin's focus and attention immediately.

“Yeah?” Hyunjin holds his breath.

“Thank you,” Felix tells him, grinning, and it confuses Hyunjin. Were his kisses something to be grateful for? That's a compliment... right? Is he supposed to say you're welcome, or—? “You were such a big help, honestly!” Felix continues, and Hyunjin suddenly deflates upon realisation that Felix's words aren't exactly in sync with his own thought process. “Especially since I'm not used to making such a big batch of cookies—well, dog treats! With packaging, too,” he keeps going, even picking up one of the carefully packed treats as an example. “You made such pretty bows!”

“Oh. Uh. Ah—” Hyunjin chuckles and rubs the back of his neck; his face is warm and he doesn't know if it's from frustration or embarrassment. “It's nothing, I liked helping out—besides, Kkami's glad he gets free treats.”

Felix nods. “Well—would you mind coming over again next Friday?” He blinks and gestures wildly. “But—I can share some of the profits once there are some! I wouldn't want you to think I'm using you for free labor!”

“Lix—” Hyunjin laughs, and attempts to cut Felix off mid ramble. “Felix, it's okay. I don't mind helping again—and you don't have to pay me with anything other than free dog treats.” Your company is payment on its own, he mentally adds, which makes him blush even though Felix (obviously) isn't privy to his private thoughts.

“Well—I'll feed you, at least!” Felix nods happily. “I made more than enough lunch for both of us today, too,” he shares, patting his bag, where, Hyunjin assumes, his packed lunch is stored. “Besides—” he ducks his head, and briefly, Hyunjin thinks he detects a hint of shyness in his demeanor. “It's nice spending time with you, Hyunjinnie.”

Oh.

Oh.

Try as he might, Hyunjin has a bit of trouble controlling the smile that quickly spreads across his cheeks.

“Yeah,” he ends up agreeing. “With you too, Lixie.”

The following Friday unfolds just like the one prior — save for the way that Felix readily allows Hyunjin more responsibility during the baking process. He lets Hyunjin measure ingredients, and he even lets him knead and roll the dough. Afterwards, however, after the treats are cut and have been left baking in the oven, well.

They kiss again.

Hyunjin is unsure how it happens this time — he thinks maybe Felix initiated it; but he can't be a hundred percent sure because he knows he definitely wanted it. Expecting it, even — at the very least he was anticipating. They're just standing side by side in front of the sink, washing hands, when Felix playfully sprinkles water at him. Hyunjin, drama queen that he is, whines markedly, and when he twists around, about to splash water right back at his friend — the latter grins widely, and he just—

Felix leans in, kisses him, and the only thing word in Hyunjin's thoughts is, oh.

“What should I do?” Hyunjin asks Jisung and Minho over lunch, his expression an obvious mix of desperation and frustration.

“You should eat,” Minho deadpans. “Lunch break is over in fifteen minutes.”

Jisung waves a hand dismissively at him, and even though Minho — who is technically their boss considering his family owns the store — wrinkles his nose at him, all three of them are well aware that Jisung has gotten away with more. Minho has a soft spot for him, and while Hyunjin was once envious of that, he's pretty used to it by now.

“What should you do about what?” Jisung urges him to continue.

“Felix,” Hyunjin mumbles; just the name colors his cheeks red.

Minho pauses after taking a bite off his kimbap roll to peer up at him, and then he exchanges a knowing look with Jisung who shrugs. Hyunjin isn't even surprised at the thought that the two of them have likely gossiped about his so-called crush on Felix. Fuck, he thinks — if Jisung knew before him, then Minho probably did as well.

He feels extra stupid, but he tries to be brave because for some reason, he actually wants their advice. Maybe, perchance, they're privy to Felix's feelings for him as well? He hopes they are, that would be a big help. It's been a little over a month since Jisung had made him realise — since Jisung had dropped the bomb that wow, he has feelings for his long-time friend.

Knowledge of his feelings has done nothing but let him mull over said feelings — as expected, doing that has only made said feelings stronger. The he has now found himself engaging in weekly make out sessions with Felix has done nothing but compound and build on said feelings; unfortunately for him, neither of them have actually talked about what's going on between them, and the longer time passes, the more Hyunjin is at a loss how to broach the topic at all.

At least Kkami has been treated very well, with all the free dog biscuits he can have — Felix's little business is starting to take off, to the point where he's been in contact with a small, local brewery for their spent grains, as Chan, simply a beer hobbyist, can't really keep up.

“Felix? Are you supposed to do something about Felix?” Jisung is giving him an incredulous look that makes Hyunjin want to curl in on himself.  

“Yes?” he manages to squeak out.

“You just told us that you’ve been regularly seeing him every week—without the rest of us. A standing weekly date where your lips and his—” Jisung sniggers, and proceeds to make obnoxious kissing noises that have Minho cackling loudly, and Hyunjin turning into a deeper shade of crimson.

Hyunjin frowns and glances at Minho — he does that as if he can expect help from Minho, which, after a quick second, he realises is useless. The older male simply shrugs while still laughing.

“Don’t look at me,” Minho tells him.

“Dude.” Jisung clicks his tongue. “What else is left for you to do? Congrats on basically getting a boyfriend.”

Hyunjin doubts it’s that easy — it shouldn’t be that easy. Right? He frowns; the few, very brief relationships he had in the past were all initiated by the other party, and he has never really had to consider what he needs to do when he likes someone.

“Do you really need labels?” Minho cuts in. “Labels are dumb — just enjoy what you have and—I don’t know. Let it happen naturally. Stop thinking too much.”

Hyunjin inhales and contemplates Minho’s words. The older male always did have a pretty calm and collected approach to life — he always seems unfazed, and Hyunjin has always envied that about him. He wishes it was as easy as Minho made it seem. 

Jisung doesn’t seem to agree, though. He wrinkles his nose and gives Minho a very pointed Look.

Hyunjin groans; he’s realising that the atmosphere around the three of them has shifted, just like that.

“Or you can ask him on a date, I guess,” Minho continues, nonchalant in his tone, even as he shifts in his seat.

Jisung snorts. “You should ask me on a date,” he spits out, his eyes meeting with Minho’s in a way that does nothing but add to the tension in the air.

And there it is, Hyunjin thinks with a heavy sigh. “Guys—” he tries to interject, “are we still talking about me here?”

A beat passes, and the two of them simultaneously turn to look at Hyunjin again.

“Don’t be daft,” Minho says with a snort; the heaviness in the air dissipates just like that. “We’re pretty sure you already know what you’re supposed to do.”

Minho’s words, expectedly, overtake Hyunjin’s thoughts completely. 

You already know what you’re supposed to do, the older male had said, simple and matter-of-fact, and deep down, Hyunjin thinks he’s probably right. It should be easy, really. He has feelings for Felix, and if there’s anyone that he needs to talk with about said feelings, it’s no one other than Seungmin.

Unfortunately for him, finding an opening in Seungmin's schedule is harder than it should be between friends; lucky for him, Seungmin knows him well enough to detect the mild desperation in his voice when he calls asking when his best is possibly free for a meal.

Seungmin is able to meet with him the following Monday, and Hyunjin doesn't hesitate in relaying every single detail of what he has been going through over the last few weeks.

He gets a bit dramatic, even, but Seungmin, like he always does, quietly listens from start to end.

“Hyunjin…” Seungmin sounds careful when Hyunjin finally pipes down so his friend can react. He pauses, and sighs, before letting out a resigned chuckle that has Hyunjin feeling nervous. “I hate to say this but… Minho-hyung is right.”

“Oh.” It's Hyunjin's turn to let out some laughter; Seungmin had made him anxious for a moment there, but his analysis, Hyunjin has to admit, is expected. After all, this was the same conclusion he had come to.

“It's a rare moment in life when I agree with hyung, but…” Seungmin clicks his tongue, and gives Hyunjin an encouraging smile. “I'm with him on this. Just—with Felix, don't be obtuse. You already know what you need to do and say—just talk to him. Talk to him, and tell him you like him.”

“Well, it's easier said than done,” Hyunjin grumbles.

“Of course it is—but is it any easier just living in your head, thinking about all the possible ways a direct confession can go?”

“Well.” 

He has to concede to Seungmin's point there.

“Hyunjinnie,  you need to put more trust and faith in yourself. You spend so much time your own thoughts sometimes—you keep second guessing yourself, and while caution can be a good thing, like everything else in life, it's not good in excess,” Seungmin tells him gently, one hand reaching over the table to cover Hyunjin's own in a comforting manner. “If you want someone—if you want something , you don't have to analyse all the pros and cons, or whether or not it’ll work out for you—or what the deeper meaning of any of it is. You don't need me or anyone else to tell me you or approve your feelings. Your gut is valid. Your intuition is good. So just go for what you want—whether it's Felix, or that post-grad degree you've always wanted since we were university freshmen. Just—go for all of them. Stop asking what you've got to lose and think about all you've got to gain.”

hhj:
hey, tonight, are you free?
want to have dinner after work?

lix:
is jisung coming too?

hhj:
oh.
do you want me to ask him?
he says he has a date…
is that fine?

lix:
yeah, of course!
oh but i have to go shopping for ingredients
do you want to do that with me before dinner?

Hyunjin had to practically beg Jisung not to go after the latter had initially agreed to go and have dinner with him and Felix; it’s his fault for even asking Jisung to begin with — he should have just told Felix that dinner was only for the two of them. Lucky for him, Minho had popped into the store in the middle of Hyunjin trying to get Jisung to back out of dinner, and saved him by telling Jisung to go eat with him instead.

Make tonight count, were the words Minho told Hyunjin when he rushed out to meet Felix. He’s pretty sure Minho was teasing, but here he is now, walking through supermarket aisles, pushing a trolley for Felix, trying his best to not think about what Minho said.

“And we’re done,” Felix announces after he plops down a couple of 2-kilogram packs of flour into the cart. “Sorry for dragging you with me here—you must be tired and hungry.” 

Hyunjin waves a hand dismissively. “It’s okay!” Truthfully, he’s been feeling a light rumbling in his stomach indicating hunger, but it’s really fine because he doesn’t mind spending more time with Felix — doesn’t mind having the extra time to brace himself for the confession he has planned.

On their way to the row of checkout counters, they pass by the Health & Body area which is lined by the fragrance section.

“Oh, one sec,” Felix tells him, pausing and holding up a finger as he offers Hyunjin a sheepish smile. “They have a sale on designer cologne!” he says. “I’ll be quick, I promise.”

Hyunjin does his best not to visibly rub his already rumbling tummy, instead choosing to nod and smile at Felix’s request. He leans against their cart and stands guard at the end of the aisle while he watches Felix sample different scents. 

“Hey, Hyunjinnie, which of these do you like better?” Felix asks, not five minutes later, when he walks back to Hyunjin and holds out his wrists, both spirited with different scents.

Hyunjin’s first thought is that Felix’s natural smell is intoxicating enough on it’s own, but expectedly, he caves and leans over to sniff accordingly. “Uh—” Immediately, his senses are overwhelmed by Felix, and he has to take a moment before choosing whatever cologne it is that Felix chose to scent his left wrist with. “This one.”

“Right, I was favoring that one, too!” Felix agrees with a nod and a grin, and then finally, after he takes a new bottle off the shelf, they head to the counter where Felix pays for everything.

It turns out that Felix had borrowed Chan’s car, so they’re able to dump all four bags of groceries—mostly baking ingredients—in it’s trunk, before they decide to just leave the car in the parking lot, and walk the one block distance to their restaurant of choice, conveniently chosen because of its proximity to the supermarket.

After they order food to share, and while they wait to be served, Hyunjin can’t help but notice that Felix is unable to sit still. He’s shifting around in his seat, looking mildly uncomfortable, which concerns Hyunjin so decides to ask.

“Is everything alright?” he frowns. “Something wrong with your chair?”

“Oh!” Felix freezes, eyes wide, looking like a deer caught in headlights. “No, no!” he gestures wildly, before proceeding to grab the edge of the table and finally ceases to visibly fidget. “There’s just—there’s something,” he starts to explain; he smiles and reaches for his bag that he has slung across the back of his chair. 

“Something?” Hyunjin is confused, but already his brain is starting to think of anything and everything that Felix’s ‘something’ might be; he winces, and mentally scolds himself.

“Yeah, well!” Felix laughs and reaches for something inside his bag. “There’s something I want to give to you—and I was going to to give it to you after dinner, but maybe I should give it now?”

“Oh.” Hyunjin feels silly; he’s now realising that Felix looks more excited than nervous. “Okay!”

Felix beams and pulls out a small bottle from his bag, which Hyunjin immediately recognizes as something from the supermarket earlier. 

“I wanted to buy it for you!” Felix explains, as he presents the cologne that Hyunjin himself had picked.

He blinks, shocked. On one hand, it’s incredibly sweet of Felix to surprise him with a gift, but on the other— 

“Do I smell bad or something?” Hyunjin asks, trying to play it off as a joke, even though there’s a hint of genuine concern as well.

“Wha—huh?” It’s Felix’s turn to look befuddled. “Oh, no! It’s not that—I like how you normally smell,” he immediately assures Hyunjin. “I just wanted to get you something—you know, as thanks! You’ve been helping me a lot over the past month, with Bok’s Barked Goods, and—well. Yeah. I’m thankful!” He beams, and paired with the absolute sincerity of his words, it’s almost blinding to Hyunjin.

“Ah. Wow, well.” Hyunjin relaxes, his palm closing around the shiny blue bottle that Felix has handed to him. “I liked helping out. It was my pleasure! Isn’t that—” his breath hitches, “isn’t that what friends are for?”

“Yeah…. What friends are for!” The corner of his mouth twitches slightly, and it isn’t lost on Hyunjin; nevertheless, the agreement comes a little too quickly for his comfort. “Actually—” Felix’s demeanor changes into a more serious—a more careful one. “There’s something else that I need to tell you, and it’s something that’s been driving me nuts.”

Oh.

Hyunjin motions for him to continue, and Felix takes a deep breath; something about the switch in his body language has Hyunjin’s heart beating fast, has Hyunjin allowing himself to think that maybe? Perhaps? The two of them have been on the same page all along?

Double oh.  

From the corner of his eye, Hyunjin’s spots their waitress, looking like she’s headed towards them; he wants to hear what Felix has to say—dare he say that he’s even excited and hopeful, but he still wonders if he should warn Felix. He wonders if it would be better to ruin the moment now before they’re interrupted by the arrival of their food, and attempt to recreate it later instead. Before he can make up his mind, however,

“I really like you Hyunjinnie,” Felix blurts out, and,

Triple oh.

Despite allowing himself to hope for and expect this it still feels like a complete surprise. A pleasant one, but he’s still stunned into silence. 

“I—” he begins, but the server finally arrives at their table with their food.

Felix is as red as an overripe tomato, and Hyunjin is sure he must be the same because the waitress gives both of them weird, judgmental looks. Embarrassed, Hyunjin barely manages a mumbled ‘thanks’ to her before she leaves.

Once she’s gone, however, Hyunjin and Felix look at each other at the same time, eyes meeting easily; Hyunjin feels a different kind of rumbling at the pit of his stomach — a feeling that’s more akin to nervous fluttering.

“Uh, yeah.” Felix is the one who speaks first; he’s wearing a shy, lopsided smile and he’s anxiously rubbing the back of his neck. “That was silly, wasn’t it? Of course I like you! But I—” once again, he inhales deeply before he continues, “I like you, like you. I feel like that’s obvious, all things considered, but Chris told me I should make it clear if I wanted to stop thinking too much about whether or not you feel the same—”

At that, Hyunjin can’t help the laughter that bubbles from his throat. “Yes—” he interrupts Felix. “I mean—no, it wasn’t obvious, but maybe it should have been—and I like you too, and I thought that was obvious—?” 

His laughter has gone from anxious to relieved. Felix likes him too.

“I like you too,” Hyunjin repeats, sounding a lot more confident this time around. “And I’ve been wanting to tell you that for a while.”

Felix nods slowly; when he smiles, his entire face—no, the entire room lights up. Hyunjin feels almost silly now. They’re grown men in their mid-20’s, and here they are, acting like a pair of prepubescent teenagers shyly confessing after weeks of dancing around feelings that were clearly quite obvious in hindsight.

“Wow,” Felix exhales. “I really want to kiss you right now.” 

Hyunjin doesn’t know where the sudden boldness is coming from, but Felix is looking happy, satisfied, and twice as confident as he did coming into this dinner, and he can’t help but mirror the feeling.

“Our standing kissing appointment isn’t until tomorrow,” he counters, teasing. “But we can reschedule a bit early after dinner.”

Felix laughs, as if Hyunjin is the funniest comic on Earth, and it makes Hyunjin feel warm — happy; happier.  

Felix is the type of person who wears his emotions on his sleeve, clear and visible for everyone to see. Hyunjin has always known that about him, but he had let his own overactive brain—his own paranoia—to hide that knowledge away from him. He knows it now, though—he remembers it clearly and for the first time in a long while, there’s nothing to think about; nothing to analyze. 

Felix likes him, and he likes Felix back — it feels like it should be more complicated than that, but it isn’t.

°°°

“Sorry I'm late!” Hyunjin announces when he arrives at Chan and Felix's apartment for yet another friend together. He knows the apartment code now, so no one had to open the door for him.

All his friends are already gathered in the living room, but at his arrival, Felix looks up and his expression brightens up considerably.

They've been dating exclusively for five months now, but the way Felix's eyes light up whenever they see each other still hasn't gotten old. His boyfriend's expression when he looks at him makes him feel warm, and loved, and best of all—steady. Confident, and self-assured, because Felix's expression always reminds him that there's something he can always believe and it's that Felix is as in love with him, as he is with Felix.

“I had to drop off three tins of Felix's chocolate chip cookies at that Gangnam address,” he explains as he squeezes in next to his boyfriend. Felix had finally made up his mind to expand his baking business to making treats for humans on top of for canines. For now, he makes bakes them per order, and he delivers only around Seoul with Hyunjin's help, but business has been booming recently and Felix has been talking about sitting down with Seungmin soon so he can reorganize his business plan.

Hyunjin is incredibly proud and excited for him. More than that, though,

“I have news,” he announces, grinning widely and practically buzzing with excitement.

Next to him, Felix's eyes grow big and he squirms enthusiastically in his seat. “Did you get in?”

He nods happily, and when Felix wraps his arms around him in a hug, he has to laugh with contentment. Around them, their friends are looking at them strangely, and he's reminded that he hasn't really told anyone else about what he's been up to recently.

“I got into our university's post grad program in Philosophy,” he explains proudly. “I'm going back to school next term.”

Jisung groans. “Why would you want to go back—oowww!” he huffs after Seungmin, who is seated adjacent to him, hits his arm. “I mean, great! Congrats! Good for you, Hyunjunnie!”

Everyone else laughs, and takes turns congratulating him; Chan announces that their little get together is now officially a celebration on Hyunjin's part.

Felix's hand finds its way to Hyunjin's, his tiny fingers interlocking with Hyunjin's slender ones. Telling his friends has him nervous again—has him feeling the pressure of doing well. They're all so proud of him, after all, he couldn't let them down. 

His brain still operates the same, still works too much in some ways, but when Felix squeezes his hand, the reassurance that he's there—that he's someone Hyunjin can count on, overcomes the unnecessary workings of his mind.

“Thank you,” he whispers to his boyfriend, who beams at him and quickly pecks his lips before he turns his attention back to Changbin who is happily and comically talking about some advertisement pitch he made earlier that day.

Happiness and peace, Hyunjin thinks contently. It's all he could really ask for, and in that moment, he has both.

///