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English
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Published:
2020-12-26
Updated:
2020-12-27
Words:
3,519
Chapters:
2/?
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Saudade - Megumi Fushiguro

Summary:

saudade
/souˈdädə/
(n.)

a nostalgic longing to be near again to something or someone that is distant, or that has been loved and then lost; "the love that remains".

Notes:

Welcome to the beginning :)

Chapter 1: Home

Chapter Text

"It feels great to be back!" Your mother cheers ecstatically while setting down the box carrying your belongings. She turns to your father and accepts his open arms to share a warm embrace and you can't help but scoff at the display in front of you. Your parents had always believed human contact was the way to prove that you truly loved someone, so when you took that stupid quiz your friend sent you the link to that revealed which love language you had, you had been convinced there was something wrong with you when the results deemed yours as "gift giving". 

 

"Huh that's weird, I was almost certain mine would be something like quality time or acts of service. Kinda cool though, but when have I ever gifted any of my boyfriends anything? Oh wait that's right I've-" 

 

"-never had a boyfriend" your mother recites from the couch, not even bothering to divide her attention from the newspaper article in front of her. You bring your attention back to your phone, examining the results again as you hear the familiar crinkling of the newspaper in your mother's hands before she finally spoke.

 

"But you know what? Remember the boy you used to be friends with back in Miyagi, what's his name again?"

"He never told me his family name, just that he wanted to be called Umi since his first name was super girly" you said, recalling the words of your former childhood best friend from the old prefecture from which your family used to reside.

 

It had been eight years since you had last seen each other and you often thought about him and how he'd grown up since your departure. 

"Even if it was platonic you still gifted him that ring that matched yours, and you also gifted Ayaka one of your favorite necklaces before we left so I'm not surprised. But are you sure a fourteen year old should be concerned with their love language at this time?" Your mother questioned, turning to you from her spot on the couch.

 

Your hand instantly rose to feel the delicate chain around your neck. It was the recipient to an ornate lapis heart, your cousin Ayaka had told you that the lapis charm represented friendship, and that if you wore it then it signified the strength of the the both of yours' connection despite the miles between the two of you.

 

You smiled to yourself despite your internal feelings contradicting with your external display as you let your fingers shift to the cool metal of your outgrown ring, you had decided to string the ring next to Ayaka's charm in a final attempt to remember a distant friend who carried an exact one to the one on your neck.

 

You came to terms with the fact that a reunion between you and Megu seemed close to none, but you smiled at the thought of the day your parents would decide to move back home where you could finally catch up with your cousin (who now took the title of best friend).

 

"Knock knock!" The door slammed against the interior of your home, you cringed at the sound as your parents shifted away from each other, obviously startled at the display in front of them.

 

"What's up l/n's long time no see!" She spoke coolly, kicking off her shoes before offering a gift to your parents in an attempt to calm their surge of adrenaline. Ayaka bowed politely to your parents before taking the box from your hands, trailing up the stairs she hummed to herself excitedly acting as if the past ten years of distance could instantly be forgotten with the blink of an eye. 

 

"She's definitely your aunt's daughter. Oi Ayaka! If you scare us again forget about the Inori discounts we get you at Takahashi's restaurant!" Your mother chided seriously, breaking character at the end as a small smile forced it's way onto her lips. Your dad's laugh rang in your ears, something that seemed to calm the disastrous feel of your home that had been littered with boxes. 

 

"Sorry, I just really missed being around my favorite aunt and uncle!" She chimed back from upstairs, her response barely audible as the rummaging of items drowned it out. Laughing to yourself, you picked up another box and headed for the for your room, excited to catch up on all the missed time spent away from each other. 

 

-

 

"Yeah so let me get this straight. You were part of the student council, had a hotshot boyfriend, captained the volleyball team, and you still thought that you weren't doing enough so you started tutoring on the weekends? Girl you're not secretly a UNICEF ambassador are you?" She interrogates you seriously, eyes reaching into your soul to find any hint of dishonesty as she grips the chuupet in her hand. 

 

"Um no, and the only reason I did it was because I wanted to meet more people" you responded, folding your clothes neatly in your drawer. You scowled at the soy sauce stain your previous practice shirt had engraved in it from the dinner date you had with your boyfriend at the onigiri restaurant near your old school. 

 

"So your ex... Hirano, are you still in love with him?" Ayaka questioned with a softened voice from your unmade bed, the grey sheets were folded neatly in the box next to the bedframe, untouched from when you put them in before you left. You turned around to see her holding the silver frame of you and him dressed up formally to attend the wedding ceremony of his close family friend. The smile on your face made any viewer feel the love that radiated off you. While you stared at the camera though, your boyfriend seemed too infatuated with you to even concern himself with the task at hand. Reminiscing on the day of the event, you remember clearly the final song and how, despite the rest of the guests on the floor, Hirano never failed to make it seem like it was just you two. You were too preoccupied in your memory to feel the tears pooling around your eyes, obscuring your vision before streaming down your face. Your cousin didn't press the issue further as she could already decipher your answer through your current state. 

 

"Ah I'm sorry..." Ayaka spoke, "but... If you ever feel like you want to get back into the dating scene, I can totally set you up with this guy in my class named Fushiguro" she offered, giving you a thumbs up and her signature smile that attempted to cheer you up. You apologized for your sudden display before quickly wiping your eyes and returning the smile. You weren't ready to move on, but you knew Ayaka felt terrible, so you played along to try and alter her attention away from her guilt. 

 

"Fushiguro, huh? What's he like?" You inquired further in an attempt to distract her from her previous question. Her expression instantly lifted. 

 

"Well actually we're not really friends and I've never really talked to him, he just seemed like your type. He's kind of introverted though, but also a delinquent if you know what I mean. He's beat up a couple people and when sensei asked him about it he said it was for good reason so I'm sure he's a great guy. Extremely hot too! A definite ten outta ten if you ask me" she explained excitedly, repositioning herself on the bed to where her legs were now hanging off the side, and her head was tilted up almost as if to signify that she was stuck in a daydream. 

 

"He sounds like such a great guy. Let's just have a potential student council representative date the complete opposite of what she's trying to enforce" you chide, bringing your hand to the pillow that rested between the wall and your back, flinging it towards her face. She looks at you mischievously, unbothered that her makeup was now being used as decoration on your favorite pillow case. Chucking it back at you with triple the amount of force, it hit you square in the face, but all you could do was laugh as you were the one that initiated the display that had just taken place. 

 

"Fushiguro y/n. Y/n Fushiguro, I can already imagine the headlines for the school newspaper. 'The student body president gone rogue'. It has a nice ring, but what if the headlines turn to 'Miyagiken Sendai Daiichi High's delinquent is a certified tsundere'" Ayaka gawked, bringing a hand to her mouth. The amount of investment she had in her made up scenario appalled you, and you had to force her to meet reality. 

 

"Ayake, I'm not going to date anyone anytime soon, I just moved back home and I want to see everything that's changed since I came back. Plus I think we're forgetting the part where I've never met him before and probably never will because we're in different classes. You know how the odds are stacked against my favor more than anyone else" you explained seriously. You knew that you'd take up her offer in a heartbeat if you didn't carry such a melancholy feeling at the idea of dating. She looked at you sympathetically before realizing her good intentions were unobtainable. 

 

"You're right, but allow me to introduce you to my friends, I've told them about you and they said they already like you better than me. I know they were joking, but don't go around stealing my friends. Please, I am lonely without social interaction. Also, I'm pretty sure Sato-san is planning on being part of the student council, so being acquainted with him would definitely help you out" she encouraged. You nodded graciously and were about to respond before being cut off by Ayaka receiving a text on her phone.  

 

"Oi it's my mom, she said I gotta go home now. Be ready a little early tomorrow. I'm coming at 8:00 so we can walk get you checked in at the front office. Don't forget to tell your parents goodnight for me. It's good to have you back around here, seriously" Ayaka said finally before saying goodnight and rushing down the stairs to leave. 

 

"Her mom must have mentioned dinner" you spoke to no one in particular. You smiled to yourself before glancing at the new uniform in front of you. Nervously, you smoothed over it, examining it and imagining what'd you look like in the black blazer. Tomorrow was the first day at Miyagiken high.

 

Another fresh start.