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Going into this, Ichiban felt so unsure of everything he had ever done. Even after reassurance from Saeko, Nanba, and Adachi… and pretty much all the rest of his friends in Yokohama. He was worried. Growing up, he didn’t have the most stable household… and even knowing all that, his wife still loved him. She loved him to death, and he loved her more than words could even begin to describe. He was elated when she announced that she was pregnant with their first child, but the second he turned around he was filled with anxiety. The day that would change his life started off pretty normally. Though his wife had a craving for kimchi, so he bought some of the hottest kimchi he knew about and they ate it beside the river. After a little stroll around Yokohama she started panicking and it was time… Ichiban was going to be a father. She shooed him off as she could tell he was anxious, and having an anxious husband would be of no help to her so he decided to do a quick jaunt around the hospital to calm his nerves. It wasn’t so much about the delivery that worried him, it was everything else after that. Could he be a decent dad without having a real dad? Sure it shouldn’t worry him as much as it did, but there was a little nag in the back of his head.
“You were never meant to be a dad. You were a useless kid, and anything you make is just as useless.”
“You should’ve never got taken out of the locker.”
“With everything you’ve done in life, how is it you deserve to have a happy life?”
He had to shake the thoughts out of his head. They hurt him. He knew what his wife would say to all that,
“You’ve been the most useful person in my life and I wouldn’t want to live a day without being by your side, Ichi.”
He had to crack a smile as he saw her telling him that. It’d be okay. It had to be okay, because he was going to have a baby with the love of his life. He would do the best he could. He stepped back into the room and waited by her side. She looked at him with terrified eyes, and even though he was just as nervous he squeezed her hand to tell her, “It’ll be okay. We’ve got this.” The delivery wasn’t easy for anybody, but finally, their baby boy was here. He was kinda chunky, and Ichiban had to keep in a laugh as he saw him. God forbid his wife think he thought their baby was ugly or something.
“You did it.” He reassured her and kissed her sweat covered head. “You did it.”
“I did…” She let out a deep sigh as she slowly started relaxing
“Yeah, you did.” He smiled as he rested carefully on her. He tentatively wrapped his arms around her sides and held her while they waited for their baby to get cleaned up. Ichiban wondered if he was as still as his son was when he was born or if he made a fuss and bothered everyone at the soapland. Ichiban’s wife reached to hold their son in her arms and held him tight against her. “Wow… he’s a real cutie.”
“He looks almost just like you, Ichiban. Look at all that peach fuzz.” She teased her husband and looked up at him. He could only smile and coo at his little family. She offered him to Ichiban after a while, and he happily took him. Not that he wanted to say it out loud, but he thought to himself,
“This is what Arakawa felt when he held the young master the first time..”
He felt the same pride that his patriarch did. This was really his child. His. Theirs. He kissed his son’s forehead as he tried to hold back his tears. His wife started crying at the sight of her husband losing his composure, and that made him lose it completely.
“Thank you.” He said to his wife
“What?”
“Thank you… he’s so perfect. I love him so much already… and I.. he’s the best. I mean. You’re the best.” He tried to explain how happy was, but ended up fumbling with his words. Thankfully, she understood what he meant and reached to give Ichiban a kiss. “Do you want something to eat?”
“Ichi, I’m fine right now.” She assured him, “Just sit down and rest for a second.”
“Okay. Okay I can do that.” He handed the baby back to her and sat down. He watched over his family with a smile and got comfortable. After having held his son, he knew that he was ready to be the best father that he could be.