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it was that time of year, when the snow cascaded down in tiny little flurries of all shapes and sizes that melted as they hit your tongue or swooped to join the soft powder that coated the ground.
this time of year always left chaeryeong in awe. she loved seeing it happen, witnessing the quiet, majestic moment herself. on special nights, when she longed for the snow to meet her again, she would stay up by the window, watching and waiting as she sipped her warm cup of hot cocoa.
for years, this was her tradition. solely hers, as was everything in her cozy little home that she cocooned herself in. when that first snowflake hit the ground, she felt appreciation. a snowflake gently reaching the ground makes no sound, has no halting impact or force, but for chaeryeong, it made all the difference. she knew she could count on that snowflake.
this year was a little different. staying home alone for the last few months had drained her. sure, she loved that peaceful silence, but she also expected to encounter rowdy neighbors and chatty classmates and visiting friends… moving in and living in her home had been lonely. she knew that now.
wordlessly, she warmed the milk on the stove, adding a little extra this time. pretending that she wasn’t alone. the milk bubbled and foamed, eager to reach the top. it rose up and up and up and— she lowered the heat and plopped the cocoa powder in, stirring the mixture with a practiced hand. she looked out the window longingly, at the other small houses that were adjacent to hers.
she wondered who they were, their stories, their hopes, their traditions, but she did not know. everyone was so detached.
she stared at the houses again, and her eyes skimmed the neat yards coated in a flimsy white and the long street that connected them all. a gray cat was in the middle of the street, meowing so quietly that chaeryeong barely even heard them, let alone seen them.
she was always so curious. within seconds, she turned the stove off and pulled on her coat. in her haste, she forgot her mittens. “it will have to wait,” she thought as she opened her front door and ran to the road. the cat had moved to the withering rose bush that belonged to her next door neighbor, the one she did not know by name but knew that they always had their trash out first. she shook her head, and walked slowly towards the cat, waving shyly. she had not thought this far.
“hey kitty,” she said, “here to catch a glimpse of the first snow too?” the cat stared. well, it was not exactly staring, but chaeryeong swore it was giving her a really? kind of look. undeterred, she peered back, observing how the cat’s paws were covered in snow and the collar stretched over their neck. the cat was charming, she decided, and she needed to help them get home because it was too cold. she noticed the tremors, and silently, she reached her hand out. slowly, slowly, slowly, she let her hand pause a few inches away from the cat, to give them an option. they only tilted their head to the side, almost as if asking her, “what? what are you doing?”
she failed to hear the nearing footsteps in her state of concentration as she reached towards the collar. “sarangie, sarangieeee, where are you?”
chaeryeong fell, hands dropping to the cold ground to catch herself, but instead, the freezing shock startled her more until the snow soaked through everything. the cat gave her the same stare.
“oh my god, are you okay? sarangie?” a girl ran towards her, hands outstretched wildly, like she was hesitating who to help first. the cat meowed at the girl, as if explaining on chaeryeong’s behalf. “thanks buddy. good effort,” she thought.
“uh… hi is this your cat?” chaeryeong smiled, lifting herself from the ground. glancing at the girl, her eyes widened a bit. it was late in the night, and she looked unnaturally beautiful under the lamppost surrounded by falling snow. glittering eyes, glimmering snow; a sight that chaeryeong’s eyes drank in greedily.
“yes, i’m sorry for scaring you. he just ran out earlier, and i didn’t notice because i was with grandma and she asked me to change the channel and— wait, sorry for rambling. i’m yuna.”
“no worries,” chaeryeong smiled again, “i don’t mind at all. i’m chaeryeong, i live in the yellow house over there. do you live by here?”
“oh, wow, i live two houses down!” she pointed excitedly. “well, actually it’s my grandma’s, but we visit a lot.”
chaeryeong nodded, smile spreading a little more. “get ahold of yourself,” she thought. “that’s nice! hey, i actually made some cocoa before running out for sarangie. would you like me to bring you a cup?”
yuna, whose hands were cold, legs were tired, and throat was parched at the unexpected encounter, readily agreed. “she is sweet,” yuna thought, watching her rush into her cute yellow house. sarangie meowed, looking up at her with knowing eyes.
“glad you agree, sarangie.”
her eyes shifted back to the entrance of chaeryeong’s home, as the girl with a warm smile offered her a large mug. yuna inhaled deeply, savoring the rich scent of cocoa without a care in the world as she took the mug from her hands. “it looks so good, thank you, chaeryeong-ssi.”
“of course,” she smiled again. “that lovely smile,” yuna thought. “—but no need to be formal with me. you can just call me unnie— wait, sorry what year are you?”
“no, you’re right,” yuna nodded, “and i’m 2003 unnie, what about you?”
“2001, i know,” chaeryeong nodded at yuna’s surprise.
“wow, unnie, that’s amazing that you’re so independent. it has been so nice meeting you, but i need to get sarangie home before grandma worries more about us both. i hope to see you around more often?”
“the pleasure is all mine,” chaeryeong smiled, real and genuine, “and if you and or sarangie want to visit anytime, you’re always welcome. enjoy the cocoa!”
“thank you, chaeryeong unnie!” yuna waved before walking to her grandma’s.
—few weeks later—
“chaeryeong unnie!” yuna yelled as she rung the doorbell. “it’s me yuna! open— woah,” she fell forward as the door had suddenly opened. quickly collecting herself, she entered the home.
“yuna, sometimes i think this is your house,” chaeryeong teased.
“all i’m missing is a key,” yuna replied back.
chaeryeong cleared her throat. she’s only known the girl for a few weeks, and already, the thought of giving her a key was one she was considering. mentally, she pictured sarangie faceplanting at her blatantly gay-panicked thoughts.
“unnieeee, chaeryeong unnie, you all right?” and suddenly yuna was right there, right in front of her, looking down at her with concerned eyes as she touched her forehead. “no fever.”
“i’m not sick, i’m just gay,” she thought. yuna snorted, “unnie, that makes no sense.”
chaeryeong blinked. “fuck.”
now it was yuna’s turn to blink. chaeryeong never cursed in front of her. she didn’t think she ever did. “chaeryeong unnie, what’s wrong?”
was she really going to confess so soon? with that warm gaze and the prompting atmosphere of her safe space, she knew the answer was yes.
“yuna, i’m sorry if this is selfish… but, i just need you to know that i like you. i do. you don’t need to reciprocate anything or even tell me anything just yet, but i just…”
chaeryeong looked up, trying to gauge yuna’s expression, but the younger girl was simply processing her words, just a few feet away. “so close,” chaeryeong thought.
“i know what you mean.”
yuna cleared her throat. “chaeryeong unnie,” she said, “i like you too. i did since you found sarangie and fell on your ass because of me.” they laughed, then, the memory of just a few weeks ago feeling like months and years from this moment.
“come here,” chaeryeong motioned, arms open wide just waiting for the right person to fit into them. and yuna did. on that couch they sat, talking about anything and everything as yuna played with chaeryeong’s hands and held them and played with them some more before sarangie started to meow at the door.
“that cat,” chaeryeong sighed, “i gotta thank them somehow.”