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In the general run of things, the two witches who were in charge of keeping an eye on Kings Cross Station had a quite cosy life. They lived in overstuffed rooms overlooking Platform 11 9/8, which was where the Ministry goods trains came and went moving food, coal and other necessities to and from the official Summoning Stations, and occasionally tottered out to have a half of harpy milk stout at the Vulgar Fraction down on the platform. On eight particular days in any given calendar year, however, they were run off their elderly feet; at the beginning and end of each term, when the Hogwarts Express departed or arrived, depending; on the day of the Ministry Annual Dinner; and on the fell and much-dreaded autumn date of the Daughters of Boadicea Annual Trip And Glee Night, on which the aforementioned Daughters visited their heroine's grave, which was not, as rumoured by Muggles, beneath Platform 10, but in fact right under the Muggle bookshop.
On this particular autumn day, due to a mistake which had caused Mariana Pringle, the elder of the two witches, to peer at the two circles around the date on the tear-off calendar and then go into a fit of leg-kicking hysterics on her squashy pink sofa, and her sister Juliana to grit her teeth, send a Howler to the Ministry, and then trot grimly downstairs to the Vulgar Fraction with an order for a keg of harpy milk stout, the Hogwarts Express and the Daughters of Boadicea were both expected.
The result of this was that neither Mariana nor Juliana Pringle were available to Vanish the steam from Platform 9 3/4 every half hour or so, as was the usual way, and by ten o'clock it was as thick as fog. Draco Malfoy looked around rather irritably, and adjusted his high collar. "I thought you spoke to the Misses Pringle," he said to his wife.
"She did," chirped his son Scorpius. "They said would she give them a hand with a lady in her hundred and twenties who'd Splinched herself Apparating in from Penge, and she said she couldn't because it was my first time getting the Hogwarts Express, and a lady in woad and blankets gave me a peppermint and said she hoped I'd be in Ravenclaw, and I said I was certainly clever enough."
"No one likes a boaster," said Draco austerely.
"But Mum said that when you and she were at school, you used to..."
"Pray that any son of mine would be spared the necessity of making my mistakes, yes," said Draco more austerely still.
Ann looked around worriedly, then reached into her handbag for a clean hanky and daubed a smut off Scorpius' nose. He had definitely got the nose from the Malfoy side of the family, as well as his pointy chin, though the eager way he kept bouncing up onto his toes to look around reminded her of his aunt Nicola. "I can't see the cousins," she fretted.
Her husband said something that might have been 'Good'.
"I know you don't like them - "
"I've never said I didn't like them. It caused me hours of amusement when young Jon and Porteous Goyle fell in the moat."
" - but they are Scorpius' cousins. Blow," added Ann, directing the second part of her sentence to her son.
"You can't tell me you want to have your last moments with Scorpius interrupted by Rowan's repellent husband warbling on about cauldron bottoms or Giles and his latest bit of fluff failing to stop Jon and Rollo from clambering down the train's funnel and getting themselves scalded to death. And even if you do," Draco continued ruthlessly, "once Scorpius is on his way, I intend to go somewhere very quiet and very expensive and have lunch with you. I do not intend to listen to the ex-Mrs Giles weeping all over me about the terrible time she had as a naval wife and failing to pick up her share of the tab."
"That only happened once, and besides, I know quite well why you don't want anything to do with poor Pansy, and it has nothing to do with Giles or the Navy."
"Was she really your girlfriend, Daddy?" demanded Scorpius.
Draco looked mildly ill. "Most children don't go poking into the discreditable corners of their parents' history," he informed Scorpius painedly. "Couldn't you just make sick noises and stick your fingers in your ears? On second thoughts, no, don't, it only emphasises your resemblance to your cousin Rollo."
"Rollo eats bogeys."
"Poor little thing!" said Ann.
Scorpius and Draco looked at each other and then at her, the resemblance on their faces very pointed. "And I wish you wouldn't talk about my last moments with Scorpius, you sound as if you thought he was going to be murdered," added Ann obliviously.
Her husband smirked. "Well, if he does happen to forget the password to get into the Slytherin common room..."
"He might be a Gryffindor," said Ann pinkly. "Then, at least, his cousins... Draco, are you enchanting that mist to make it thicker?" She waved her wand sharply. "Diffindo!"
The mist cleared to reveal a knot of people, about half of them red-haired, all staring at the Malfoys. Ann smiled back in a friendly way. "Oh, look, Draco, it's little Ron, I remember when I found him after Peeves stuck his head in a toilet, and..."
"I know who they are," snapped Draco, nodded to them coldly, and turned away. "Scorpius, have you got your owl?"
"Of course I have, he's right here in this cage. I'd better be getting in, Dad, there won't be any seats left, and I'm not sitting next to Poo-house Goyle, he smells funny."
Ann looked agonised. She leaned down and adjusted Scorpius' scarf one last time, and dabbed a kiss against his cheek. "Now, remember your father and I will be very, very proud of you whatever house you're in - "
" - as long as it's Slytherin - "
" - and even if it's Hufflepuff you should remember that two of your aunts were there and I very nearly was, only I made the Hat put me in Gryffindor because I knew Ginty and Peter would be and they'd need me. Do your best, and remember to tell the other boys in your dormitory that they can't make a lot of noise at night because you need your sleep, and - "
" - and we'll explain where you've gone to the peacocks, so they don't make a racket shouting The son and heir has been stolen away and keep me awake at night," finished up Draco briskly. He handed the owl-cage up to Scorpius. "Want some advice?"
"No," said Scorpius defiantly, small pointed face screwed up in an effort not to cry.
"As soon as you've got time, go to the place I told you and say hello to Moaning Myrtle. It never hurts to have a friend in damp places."
"Who's Moaning Myrtle? Was she your girlfriend, too?" Scorpius made a face. "Was everyone at Hogwarts your girlfriend?"
Draco looked back at Ann, who was chatting to Hermione Granger whilst Hermione's husband hung back looking as out of place as an unpaired sock. "No, your mother wouldn't look at me until years after we'd left," he said with a slight softening in his voice.
"Ugh, Dad."
"Quite."
The doors were slamming all along the train. Scorpius waved cheerfully, then popped up at another window, waving still. His cousin Jon's face was visible beside him. Draco felt his own face stiffening into well-bred hauteur. And, dear Merlin, there were more of his wife's brothers and sisters, not to mention more of their dreadful connections the Weasleys...
He collected Ann, who was starting to look pinker still and sniffling, and steered her very firmly out of the station.
A harassed-looking witch in bedroom slippers hurried past them, hustling a porter along by the arm. "... don't know where they got that cauldron, I thought it was just pumpkin juice, but then all these men started jumping out shouting Revenge for St. Albans and I think some of them got out among the Muggles, and the wretched organiser woman was no help at all, she just sat there weeping over her clipboard and saying that she was missing three Welsh witches and one wheel off the coach and it must have happened when they stopped to use the loos back at the teashop..."
Ann half turned round. "Oh dear, maybe I should stay and give the Miss Pringles a hand..."
"I hate to think what would have happened to you if you'd married someone less selfish than I am," said Draco detachedly. "Lunch."