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The soft blade traced its way on the thin and bright skin of the painter. A few seconds later, a hot and red liquid was running down his arm. He took his brush, and with conviction made the last stroke on his painting, finishing the red and vivid background. That was something that always amazed people, they didn’t get how he could get such a unique tone of color. A vivid color that with time faded away, leaving a burgundy color behind. That was the thing that made the painter so famous, no one could get what he used, the varnish he used making it impossible to analyse what it was; rumors were circulating, a lot people thought it was blood. They were right, of course, but he always denied it, scared of seeming crazy. Before he came to the manor, he had the chance to paint with many different blood, but since he was here, he had to paint with his own, having to hurt himself to finish his painting. That did not seem to bother him in any way though. He already painted with his own blood, multiple times. That’s how he started his morbid hobby. Then he got to paint with other people’s blood, and stopped painting with his own because of a promise. A stupid promise that didn’t mattered anymore. He just had to bandage his wounds and then wait for them to heal, hiding them wasn’t a problem at all. He just wore long sleeve shirts, winter or summer, he didn’t really care about the heat. These last days, it has been snowing at the manor, not allowing any match to be done. Edgar spent most of his time in his room, isocialiting himself from everyone. Time to time, people would pass by to check up on him, it was often Emily, the nurse, and more surprisingly, Luca Balsa, who had literally nothing to do with the painter.
Well, this wasn’t actually right. They actually had a lot of things to do with each other, but with Balsa brain damage, they had nothing to do. Edgar always displayed the same arrogant tone that didn’t seem to bother Balsa at all, the man even seemed amused by it, making jokes and annoying the crap out of the painter. This idiot was so dense, it often made Edgar mad. How could he act like that when he had no memories of their previous relationship or whatever. That always made him quick to rage, wanting to reveal the whole truth to Balsa, but his dignity made him avoid this awkward and hurtful situation.A knocking sound took him out of his thoughts, alarmed, he immediately wiped his dry blood running down his arm with a tissue before pulling down his sleeve.
“- Yes?” he asked, already knowing who was behind the door just by the knocking sound. The door opened quickly and Balsa made his way into the painter room without waiting for an actual answer if he had the right to do so or not.
“- Hey Eddie! I Was bored so I thought I would come pass some time with you!” said the prisoner, before falling dead weight on the bed.
“- Don’t call me Eddie. Also, I never allowed you to get in my room like that, even less to slump you down on my bed like that” aggressively said the painter.
“- Oh come on! It’s not like you were doing some secret business or whatever, right?” Balsa looked at his friend who showed a pretty angry face, but Luca knew it was just a facade. It was just his intuition to be honest, but he somehow knew that every bitter emotion that the painter showed, was just a facade to his true self. Something probably scared Edgar for him to never show his genuine emotion, but Luca never thought too much about it, he didn’t know a lot about human behavior anyway. “or were you?” he added a few seconds later.
“- No, I was just finishing my painting. You could have distracted me.”
“- But I didn’t! So it’s not a big deal!” Said Luca with the same grin as usual on his face, his fang poking out of it. Edgar sighed, he knew that no matter how hard he would try to make the prisoner go away, he wouldn’t leave for now, and planned to stay here for a while.
“- So. What are you here for?” asked the painter, crossing his arm and looking at Balsa from his chair.
“- I don’t know, I just wanted to spend some time with you I guess! You know I’m bored since there haven't been any matches lately.”
“- Don’t you have machines to work on?”
“- I’m tired of doing it all day! I mean, it’s interesting, but lately i’ve been focusing more on… The past, what happened before I got brain damage. I don’t remember anything, except maybe… Three or four things? Like how i build machine for exemple, but that’s tiring to live only remembering stupid things like this-”
“- What’s your point?” Asked Edgar stopping Luca in his monologue.
“- Eh, well…” he started while getting up, scratching the back of his head, embarrassed, “ I remember a dance, it’s super blurry though.”
“- Don’t tell me you came here to ask me to dance with you.” Said Edgar with a serious tone.
“- Well it seems like you guessed right!” laughed Luca
“- There’s no way I’m dancing with you.”
“- C’mon! It’s snowing tonight, we could dance under the snow, that would be cool!”
“-You don’t even remember how to dance correctly, you said it yourself. It’s blurry.”
“- Yeah but I’m sure you remember, right, Eddie?”
The painter didn’t answer to that, a stop was needed. How did he know? He had brain damage, and when they first saw each other at the manor , Luca had no idea of who Edgar was despite their anterior life. They became perfect outsiders, they eventually learned how to know each other again, but it was so hurtful to Edgar. Seeing his past lover not remembering any part of him just hurted so much. How could he know that they loved dancing together before all of this happened. The painter shook his head, there’s no way he was actually remembering anything about him, it was just a coincidence.
“- I’m not dancing with you.” said the painter with a serious tone, mad at the man in front of him for being so dense without even knowing it.
“- No one will see us, I’m sure it’ll be fun!” tried to convict Luca. Edgar knew he wouldn't let him go so easily, and will probably force until the young man accepted. A long argument started after this. Luca started to say every single argument he had and the painter simply ignored him, throwing him nasty look from time to time. Around fifteen minutes had passed by now, and the painter finally sighed.
“- Fine. I’ll give you one dance, but that’s all.” Said Edgar defeated by all the talking of the man in front of him. A big smile showed on Luca's face. Damn, he didn’t know the prisoner could get any cutter, it was genuine emotions.
“- Let’s go then!” He took the painter by his wrist and started to bring him out of his room. He pulled a face as he felt a sharp pain running through his arm. If he pressed more than he already did, his wound would reopen.
“- Wait, you were serious about doing it in the snow?” He said surprised, not really wanting to dirty his shoes and be cold outside.
“- Well yeah!” Luca had a big smile showing on his face, bringing the young man out of the mansion, enthusiastic. Once they were outside, Luca put themself in a dancing position, “ I let you lead!”
“-Wh-” Oh right, Luca didn’t exactly remember how to dance, he counted on Edgar to lead and teach him how to dance. “ Okay, so. Put your feet like this and your hand like that.” He said, bringing them closer to each other. Their size difference was striking, which would make it difficult for Edgar to lead perfectly. They started dancing slowly, Luca watching every mouvement and tried to replicate everything without stepping on Edgar feets by accident. A few minutes later, he finally got the movements, and started to lead which was easier for the smaller man. They danced at the same speed, looking at their feet to make sure to be coordinated, until they both saw it. A pearl of vivid blood came crashing into the ground, slowly spreading into the clear snow. They both stopped and Edgar looked at his arm, his sleeve full of blood. He panicked and let off his grip that he had with the prisoner, taking a few steps back, holding his arm tightly. Luca didn’t say anything, though. He just switched into looking at the blood on the ground and the bloody sleeve of his beloved friend. Something was wrong, he awfully felt like this already happened once. He couldn’t remember correctly, dammit, he really hated his shitty memory. He was lost, not knowing how to react. He knew what was happening, he knew the cause of the injury of the painter, he remembered it. But he definitely didn’t know what he was supposed to react, how he reacted before, this part was so blurry.
“-Edg-”
“- Shut up!” Said the painter not wanting to hear anything from the man in front of him. Damn, why does everything had to be like before. He didn’t want it to happen again, he wouldn’t let the man he loved hurt himself because of him. Gosh, he was stupid, so stupid. He should never have accepted this dance in the first place. He tried to get back to the manor, running, but he was stopped by Luca grabbing him by his not injured arm.
“- Wait!”
“- No! Shut up, shut up, shut up!” repeated the painter, trying to get out of his grip, failing.
“- Why?” only asked the prisoner, “why do you infligate this to yourself?”
“- That’s not your business, not that you would care or remember anyway.” Said Edgar in a dry tone, “ Leave me alone. You got your dance. I don’t have anything to do with you anymore.”
“- I.. I care!” a silence installed itself between them, the painter giving nasty looks to the prisoner, “listen, I hate not remembering! Since the first day I saw you sad because I didn’t remember you, I hated it! I tried to remember I really did! Why did you think I spent so much of my time with you even if you treated me like shit, when i could have just gone back to build my machine?! I tried to remember you, but as soon as I do it’s so blurry I don’t know what I’m supposed to do!” The silence came back again, and Luca slowly weakened his grip around Edgar's wrist. “It’s cold. Let’s get back inside, I’ll treat your wound and we’ll talk about it.”
“- I don’t want to. Leave me alone” Tears were ready to fall from the painter's eyes. He didn’t want to talk about it in any way, he didn’t want to tell the prisoner what their previous relationship was. But at the same time, he wanted him to remember and to know. He wanted the relationship that he cherished so much back.
“- Please, Eddie.” The painter got out of the grip and looked down, blood spilling on the snow. He didn’t have a choice, but he was so scared. He simply nodded, not really answering and made his way back to the manor with the prisoner following him. It was late, they had no chance to see anyone at this hour. They silently got into Edgar's bedroom, who carefully closed the door behind them. He sighed, and pulled up his sleeve. Luca sadly looked at the wound, surrounded by similar scars. He went quickly into the bathroom and got out with things to heal the injured arm of his friend. Well, if he could call him a friend. He was so much more than a friend to Luca’s eyes, but he would never admit it. He hated this feeling, he knew that the painter didn’t care about him. But no matter how much time he would crush his hope, he never stopped loving him.
He started to bandage the wound carefully, making sure to not hurt Edgar, who looked in silence.
“- So, why?” asked the prisoner while finishing the bandage.
“- To paint.”
“- What?”
“- You heard me right. To paint. Blood fades away and makes the painting olding with time. That’s how I got famous for my art. But you don’t remember, right?”
“- I… I can’t remember but listen… It’s super blurry but… It already happened, right? I can’t tell if it was with you but I remember dancing with someone, and blood running down to my hand and… Well that’s all actually.” The painter looked the prisoner in the eyes, surprised by what he just heard.
“- You remember?!”
“- Yeah but it’s super blurry and-”
“- I… I can tell you what happened. Take it as a gift for treating my wound.” ah, right. Edgar would never give this kind of information for free. But he didn’t matter right now, Luca only wanted to learn what happened. He needed to know. “Before… Before the accident that got you brain damaged, we used to spend a lot of time together. We were both from rich families, they were on good terms and often saw each other, so we did. We met in the ballroom of my house, and ever since, we would always spend time together in this room. You loved dancing. I was not a big fan of it, but you made me love it, always bringing me on and forcing me to dance with you. I… Was already painting with blood at this time. You discovered the same way you discovered it this time. By dancing. You looked so sad, and we made a promise. That I would never hurt myself again, and that I would get blood by another way. Then, you gave me your blood. I didn’t know it was, until I saw the huge scars on your arm” Oh, so they’re from here. He was sure he just got injured while in prison, which was a time he couldn't exactly remember. “We had a huge argument this night. Then we promised to each other to not hurt ourselves anymore. I kept that promise until I saw you at the manor. You didn’t remember, so what was stopping me from doing it? it’s not like it bothered me in any way. It was even… a relief. That would help me cope with the fact that you didn’t remember anything from our past relationship. Because it hurted so much to see you, my past lover, thinking I was a perfect outsider that you never met.”
What?
“- What?” Luca was not sure if he heard it right. Past lover? They were lovers before all of this? He swore he could hear his heart beat in this situation. He didn’t know what to say. He had too much to say. How much he loved Edgar since he first… No since he met him again. How much he wished to get his memory back to know if they passed good times together, how much he wanted to dance, kiss, cuddle with him. So many thoughts were going on in his head. “I-”
“- No. I don’t wanna hear it.” said the painter, preparing to get rejected, “you have nothing more to do here, you treated my wound and we talked about it. You can go now.”
“- No no no, wait! I could, you know, be your present lover?”
A silence made its way in the room. Gosh, why was he so dense. It was Edgar's turn to be flustered, he felt his cheeks becoming red, and quickly reached his face with his hand, hiding half of his face with his arm.
“- What?!” He couldn’t believe what was happening. No one was talking, they looked at each other's eyes without saying a word. Both of their cheeks were burgundy, Edgar loudly swallowed his saliva from the anxiety growing in him, no it couldn’t be. It was a joke, it had to be a joke, the prisoner couldn’t fall in love with him two times in his life. But, no sign of it being a joke showed on Luca’s face. He seemed dead serious, even his habitual grin was not showing. Edgar slowly putted his arm down, and with all his courage, pulled his face closer to the one of the man in front of him, grabbing him by the chain that was around his neck. A few seconds of hesitation passed, before he put his lips on luca’s one. Their kiss was soft, the bigger man put his hands around the painter's waist, bringing them closer than they already were. Edgar had to stop the kiss, needing to breath, their breaths mixing together because of how close they were. A small smile showed on Edgar's face, some things never changed, after all.
“- I… I really love you”
“- Me too, Eddie!” said Luca with his habitual grin coming back on his face. “Now… Promise me that you’ll never hurt yourself again.” he said in a more serious tone. Luca looked down.
“- Sure, I promise you.” he said, looking back up and smiling.