Work Text:
She left her car only to buy a hot dog from a street vendor. When she came back, her beloved Avenger was a burning wreck with someone’s mangled motorcycle perched on top of it. She watched with a blank stare as her eddies burned in the gradually building fire.
“Another one bites the dust,” Johnny watched beside her, somehow procuring a hot dog himself. It wasn’t the weirdest shit he has pulled, so she paid it no mind. “How many cars did you lose like that already?”
“Your Porsche is next.”
Johnny threw his phantom food in her face. “Don’t you dare.”
Out of the corner of her eye she saw a helmeted figure pick himself up from the road. He was miraculously unharmed, save for the scraped chin. When he saw the merc approach, he tried to crawl away, fearing a bullet to the brain.
She picked the man up and interrogated him briefly. He was middle-aged, though it was hard to tell. She could see through the tears and the broken Chinese and tell that this guy had nothing on him. Prolly worked a shitty job for ennies. Shaking him up and asking for money would have been pointless, so she let the man go once the NCPD showed up to hastily write up a report on the accident.
Problem was, she had a date in an hour. All that was left in her garage was Johnny’s precious Porsche and Jackie’s Arch, which was meant for one big boy and his big dreams, not for two lovebirds in deadly traffic where rogue Delamains caused mayhem for fun.
No matter, the Porsche would save the day. She pressed the beckoning button on her key card. Once. Twice. Nothing. The merc and her construct both glared bloody murder at the tracker that announced that the car was not moving. The AI was not reacting, something had to be busted. In a fit of despair, she pressed the button at least fifteen more times and laughed weakly when there was no change.
Fuck my life.
Alright, plan C. She could roll in a regular taxi, or order up a Delamain. How would that look, though? She planned the whole date, promised Judy she would not need her van and that she’d pick her up after work. Even Jackie had the good sense to borrow wheels for a date in a tough situation instead of ordering a bloody taxi.
There was no borrowing to be done, though. Like hell anyone with half a brain would ever give her anything when she was losing cars five minutes after she purchased them.
Okay, plan D. Fixer cars. V checked her bank account and cursed. This had to be done cheap. Her eye twitched when she saw that only two cheaper cars were available: the tiny Makigai MaiMai and Thorton Galena that looked like it has witnessed communism and could tell stories about it. The rust bucket was still a better option than the MaiMai, V would never be able to look Judy in the eye if she came to pick her up in one of those monsters.
Since there was no other alternative, V rolled into the parking lot in front of Lizzie’s in the ugly car. The Moxes at the door were snickering when they saw her emerge from the battered vehicle. Rita’s guttural laughter drew attention of more Moxes who came outside to find out what was going on, Judy among them.
She found her output standing next to the old car, brooding at the horizon with a cigarette-shaped lolly in her mouth. It was a brand that was supposed to help battle nicotine addiction.
“Hey, V!” Rita yelled, resting the baseball bat back on her shoulder once she caught her breath. “What happened to that sweet ride of yours?”
The solo mimicked a crash and a big boom.
While the Moxes amused themselves with the notion of V changing cars like socks, Judy came up to her and bit into the lollypop to yank it out, dumping it rudely on the ground before she claimed her lips in a languid, deep kiss. Her arms snaked around V’s neck and she pressed herself into her. Their audience started whistling and catcalling.
“Can I have some too?”
“Making a statement, Jude?”
When they parted, V looked a bit dazed. PDA was still something she was not quite used to, though she liked it very much. “All set to go?” Judy asked, fixing V’s collar.
The domestic gesture threw her off much more than the kiss. “Uhm,” her voice pitched higher than she intended. “Hop in, before they invite themselves into our bedroom.”
Judy rolled her eyes. “Too late for that, trust me.” She got into the car, cringing at the sound the old door made. “You got yourself tetanus on wheels, girl. Remember that rusty old car we found in Laguna Bend?”
V got into the driver’s seat and followed Judy’s line of sight. Apart from the rust covering one part of the door, there were candy wrappers stuck into every hole and compartment. “I remember.”
“I feel like that car was much better off.”
V whined and face-planted against the wheel. “I knooow. I’m so sorry, Jude.” A hand patted her on the back. She could tell that Judy was more amused by this turn of events than annoyed.
“There, there. You can come pick me up with a shopping cart next time around.” The merc turned her head to glare at her. “Or a cute little vespa scooter.”
“Fuck it, just get a bicycle,” Johnny joined in on the roast from the back seat.
Judy started laughing at the mental imagery. “Rita might not survive that.”
I might not survive that, V thought wearily, turning the key in the ignition. Nothing. Even Judy’s laughter died down and the two women exchanged a look, wondering if they were destined to walk. And then, on the seventh try, the engine purred with the grace of a dying beast.
V drove out of the parking lot at a snail’s pace, afraid that the car couldn’t handle more pressure. She filled the gas tank before the date, hell, she even cleaned the worst of the mess, but there was no saving this ride. It has already managed to make a dent in her ego.
Meanwhile, Judy complained about work. Someone with a foot fetish demanded an actor who was extremely ticklish. Things didn’t go well, and now Judy was stuck with a BD where one of the actors ended up with a busted nose.
“Okay, we’re here. Behold, the most romantic eatery in town!” The car died just as they were trying to park it in front of the dingy little burger place. Despite its appearance it had decent food.
Judy sighed theatrically and exited the car. “You never take me anywhere nice.”
V took her hand and led her inside, refusing to let go until they found their booth. Neither woman knew how to sit properly, so they ended up on separate seats, sprawled out unapologetically. As they waited for their order, Judy drummed her fingers on the table.
“Getting impatient?”
The techie shook her head. “Just have a lot on my mind right now. Also, not that I’m complainin’, but why have a date here of all places?”
V watched Johnny whack a jukebox in the corner to make it stop playing the mindless techno shit. As the man raged against the machine, V turned to her girlfriend and gave her an eloquent shrug. “The food is alright?”
“Don’t gimme that crap, V.” Judy leaned across the table. “We could have gone to any place near Lizzie’s, no car needed. Why here?”
“Ooh, scrutiny!” The merc put her feet up on the seat and embraced her knees. “Look around you. Is it crowded? No. Does it look like it’s worth the trouble to rob it? Also no. I only see two exits, no rooftop access either. Don’t suppose anyone would swoop in through the window, but…”
“Oh, for fuck’s sake, V. I knew it was because of some dumb security reason.”
V reached across the table and squeezed her hand. “You also don’t strike me as a woman who would appreciate a date at Corpo Plaza in some five star restaurant.”
“Guessed correctly. I just don’t get it.” Judy rubbed her chin, pretending to be deep in thought. “For a girl who doesn’t like pizza — pizza, of all things — you sure like your burgers.” She shook her head in mock disapproval. “Your priorities are whack.”
“Aren’t you supposed to flirt with me instead of insulting my food preferences?” When Judy shrugged at her back, V continued. “Here, I’ll start. You have pretty eyes.” She leaned in and took a hold of Judy’s hands, staring into the brown depths like a love-struck fool. “If I but stared a little longer, I would find the meaning…of breathtaking love.” They could only hold the charade for a few seconds before they both started giggling.
“Wait, I can do better,” Judy said, clearing her throat. “V.” She touched her forearm, her gaze unusually serious. “From the moment I met you, I knew you were the one—“ She was interrupted by V’s sputtering. “Shut up, let me finish.” The techie smiled fondly as she watched her girl fight with the persistent laughter. “Your penguin waddle out of the basement once the session was over captured my heart.”
“Penguin waddle? I didn’t waddle!”
“You totally did, calabacita. Think I put you through too much at the time, you looked like a zombie.” Judy was not sorry at all.
“I think I’m going to puke just watching you two, but I got one too.” Johnny sat down next to Judy and looked at V as if she was a fly on the wall. “Roses are red, violets are blue. I wanted you dead, but now I barely tolerate you.”
“Aw, that’s oddly sweet,” she said to Johnny, moving to make space for the waitress who gave them their orders. “Okay, dig in. Let’s see if you will make fun of me once you eat your food, miss I-will-give-you-shit-for-stereotypes.”
Judy dipped her finger in ketchup and smeared it across V’s nose. The merc tried to do the same, but she ducked away. “Come on, how old are you, V? Act like an adult.”
“Oho, you did not-”
A familiar voice made her pause. “V! I didn’t notice you!” River stood up from the booth right behind them, pocketing his phone. He pointed at his face. “You have a thing on your nose.”
“It’s blood.” V wasn’t sure whether the man got that it was a joke since she said it so matter-of-factly. Probably a bad idea to say that to a cop.
Judy watched him like a hawk when he sat down next to V. So, this was the guy she has heard so much about? Interesting. As far as she knew, V put him down through texts after their “dinner date”.
“How have you been?” he asked and even went as far as giving his choom a very stiff fist-bump. River finally noticed the other woman. “Oh, hi. We don’t know each other, do we?”
“River Ward, right? Heard lots.” Folding her arms, she had to control herself not to get smug around the poor guy. V’s eyes were flicking from one person to another as she rubbed the ketchup off with a napkin.
“Then I find myself at a disadvantage.” He held out his hand and Judy looked down on it as if it was covered with boogers. V was slowly shrinking in her seat, not sure whether to intervene or watch the drama unfold. Johnny strongly advised to stay put.
“No offense. Not a fan of touching.”
River finally noticed the Mox tattoos. “Of course. My apologies. I like your ink, by the way.”
“Thanks. I like your coat.”
“River, this is Judy Alvarez, she just forgot her manners at the door,” V said, giving her girlfriend a meaningful stare. Just act normal.
“So how do you two know each other?”
V was about to open her mouth and set him straight, but Judy beat her to it. “Picture this: a dark basement full of porn...”
V groaned, hiding her face in her palms.
River looked thoroughly lost. “Porn?”
“I’m a BD editor. Doin’ some work for the Moxes, got all kinds of stuff. Bondage, orgies, edging, some real athletic shit too, plus all kinds of fetishes under the sun.” The man was listening to her every word without flinching, she would give him that much. Not easy to fluster, unlike certain someone. “V had some cravings and my friend Evelyn decided to recommend me.” The merc was mouthing ‘I hate you’ as she went on. “Gave her some quality brain dances that made her walk funny when I was done with her.” She winked at her girl, smiling innocently.
River fought to find the right words and was even more stunned by V’s silence. The merc found it pointless to put out the flames when the damage has already been done, so her only response was a casual shrug.
Despite the wording, the tension, and the obvious winking, the guy still did not catch on to the fact that he was crashing a date. “Well, uh, to each their own. Definitely love the confidence, though.” He smiled at V supportively. That smile was a bit too sweet for Judy's taste.
Seeing red, Judy was about to pounce on the guy and drag him out by force. Instead, she found her happy place and reminded herself that the lovable gonk already dumped him. “Very confident in what she wants, right. Sharp too. Could read people’s intentions like a pro.”
“Wouldn’t be alive if I didn’t,” the merc muttered and took a mouthful of her drink.
“Should’ve been a cop.” River’s suggestion wasn’t even a joke. They both knew V was perceptive and had a good eye for finding things, she was just dense enough to walk into a No-Tell Motel room without expecting the obvious.
“Oookay, topic change.” V put a hand on River’s shoulder and leaned in to whisper something in his ear. Judy disliked the close proximity, but she disliked the secrecy even more.
River’s eye widened with recognition and he looked at Judy with the fearful respect of a patient looking up at his drill-wielding, sadistic dentist. The cooperation was necessary for both of their sakes to get through their current situation.
“Ah, crap.” He stood up and coughed into his fist. “I’m so sorry, I did not mean to interrupt you. In fact, I’m not even here anymore.” He backed out of the booth and made a quick exit from the burger joint.
When Judy looked over at V, she found the merc staring at her knowingly. “You told him?”
“Obviously, duh.” The merc snorted. “Won’t let him intrude on our date. What, did you think I’d let him stick around?” Her voice dropped into a husky whisper. “You’ve made your point loud and clear when you had me handcuffed. I’m all yours.”
Judy couldn’t help but kiss her long and hard. V’s laughter rumbled in her chest as they kissed and she pulled away with a smile. “Come on, let’s eat. Last meal I had ended up in the trash. Stupid, cheap hot dogs…”
They kept up an easy banter as they ate, and Judy had to admit that the food did not suck. What did suck was the second interruption in form of a legendary fixer casually strutting inside like she owned the place. Spotting the grey hair and the unmistakable bright top, V did what any reasonable mercenary would do: she hid underneath the table.
Unsure what to do with herself, Judy tried her hardest not to look suspicious. Tapping her finger anxiously against the can of her NiCola was probably not the right way to go, but she had a grown ass woman underneath the table, and her imagination was running wild.
“Come out, you pussy.” The old rocker banged a fist against the table. “She’s here for me, I can tell. Go say hi, I am bored out of my mind.”
The fixer was with someone who looked like a bouncer. So far, she seemed more interested in ordering a cup of coffee than searching the place for someone.
“What the hell are you doing?” Judy whispered incredulously to the table. Her phone buzzed and she reluctantly opened up the message.
[V]: We need to get out of here STAT
[Judy]: Why?
[V]: I am too shy and she is a celebrity UwU
Judy kicked the gonk under the table.
[V]: Okay, fine. Don’t want her to know about you. And I don’t want her to dump a job on me. Or maybe she knows I’m here – in which case we are fucked
[V]: Also don’t kick me again, please, I have my drink down here with me :(
Looking up from her phone, Judy briefly made eye contact with the fixer and felt her heart beat faster. Instead of looking away, Rogue measured her up with an unreadable expression on her face. Then she advanced, and the BD editor started kicking the cowardly woman as subtly as she could to force her to move.
“I’ve heard about you,” Rogue said as she effortlessly slid into the seat opposite Judy. V rammed herself between her legs to escape the fixer’s limbs, back turned to her output. “Judy Alvarez, correct?”
“What does a fixer want from me?” Judy acted unapproachable, knowing that it would not work on this woman, but she would not eat out of her hand. She touched the top of V’s head and gave it a little reassuring pat to let her know she was safe.
“Just here to give you a warning.” Rogue produced a cigarette and let her bodyguard light it for her. She took a long whiff, then continued. “Your name appears in many corpo logs these days. You’ve ignored and refused too many offers that should not have been tossed aside in the first place. A bruised ego is one thing a corpo-rat can survive, but a lost business opportunity? That’s something they don’t forgive.”
Will look into that later. V texted her, the message flashing on the display of her phone for a brief moment. Protective girlfriend mode: activated.
Judy lit her own cig, unbothered. “I’m leavin’ this shithole soon, so they can throw as many tantrums as they want.” Something in Rogue’s gaze hinted at approval. “Were you contacted by someone to take me out, then? Did someone take it?”
“No, kid. I’m not that stupid.” Rogue must have moved her legs because V was pressing herself against Judy again.
[V]: I’m gonna die here T.T
The fixer smirked as her eyes landed on the glowing display of Judy’s phone. Who could say whether she could read it or not. “If you had someone breathing down your neck, then they would need to deal with the Mox first. Gangs often hold grudges when their money-maker gets stolen.”
The bouncer excused himself and announced that the person Rogue was waiting to meet there has arrived. It was a young man by the looks of it. “I’ll get out of your hair, then. Say hello to our mutual acquaintance for me, would you?” With that, she rose, and went to the booth where the man sat, nursing a can of soda.
Judy grabbed her phone and typed frantically.
[Judy]: What’s your genius plan for our exit?
[V]: Distraction. You go first, wait for me by the car.
Judy was about to stand up when she felt a soft caress gliding up her knee.
[V]:Or we could stay like this a bit longer. I like it down here
[Judy]: Bet you do. I’m still leavin
[V]: Just have to watch you go then ;)
Judy chuckled and left, feeling the merc’s eyes roaming all over her back. It took barely two minutes before she appeared outside of the diner.
“So? Did she see you?”
V shook her head. “Don’t think so, but I have a feeling she knew I was there. What are you grinning about?”
“I got you all wet,” Judy tugged at the hem of V’s soaked shirt. She probably shouldn’t have kicked her so much. “Well, I call that a successful date.”
“You’re kidding? I feel like we barely had enough time to focus on each other.”
“That can still be fixed, hermosa.” A slender finger traced V’s lower lip. “My place, or yours?”
Johnny threw his hands up. “Oh god, no, not this shit again.” He walked here and there while the two women flirted, muttering about useless sapphics.
“Mine is closer. Oh, I forgot.” V grabbed Judy’s hand and started shaking it. “Dear miss Alvarez, on behalf of the Old-ass-apartment-building-complex Inc., I would like to congratulate you-“ Judy saw the biometric lock key being loaded as the merc kept yapping, “for acquiring brand new digs. Complete with a mini fridge!”
“I can see what you’re doing, you twerp.”
“Can you, truly?” V’s eyes were still glowing bright gold. “How very perceptive of you.”
As they fooled around on the sidewalk, a black car drove into the parking lot at full speed, ramming straight into the old Galena.
“BEEP-BEEP, MOTHERFUCKER!”
The culprit sped off, disappearing into traffic. V wished she could be at least surprised, but she honestly did not expect the car to last as long as it did anyway.
“You know, I think we should just walk.”
Judy intertwined their fingers and began pulling her away with a smile. V suddenly thought of that night back at the dam, hoping that she would never get used to the warm, giddy feeling in her chest.