Chapter Text
When I was a kid, whenever I’d feel small or lonely, I’d look up at the stars, wondered if there was life up there. Turns out I was looking in the wrong direction. When other life entered our world it was from deep beneath the Pacific Ocean, a Fischer between two tectonic plates. A portal between our dimensions, the breach. I was only 10 when the first Kaiju landed in Stohess. By the time tanks, jets and missiles took it down, six days and thirty-five miles later, three cities were destroyed. Tens of thousands of lives were lost. We mourned our dead, memorialized the attack, moved on. And then, only six months later, a second attack hit Trost. And then the third one hit Calenith District, and then the fourth. And then we learned, this was not gonna stop, this was just the beginning. We needed a new weapon. The world came together, pooling its resources, throwing aside old rivalry for the sake of the greater good. To fight monsters we created monsters of our own. The Jaeger program was born. There were setbacks at first, the neural lobe interface proved too much for a single pilot. A two pilot system was implemented, left hemisphere, right hemisphere, pilot controlled. We started winning, the Jaegers stopped invasions everywhere. But the Jaegers were only as good as their pilots. The Jaeger pilots turned into rock stars, the danger had turned into propaganda, Kaijus into toys. We got good at it…winning. Then…then it all changed.
Germany, August 24, 2020
A pale butterfly fluttered its blue wings in the early afternoon breeze, occasionally landing on the purple flowers scattered through the field. The small butterfly landed delicately on the tip of a young boy's nose, staying for only a second as the boy began to stir.
"Eren," A soft voice called out from somewhere far away.
"Eren!" The voice called again, much closer this time. The boy lifted his head, eyelids heavy as he looked at the small figure crouching beside him. As his eyes adjusted to the bright shine of the afternoon sun, he saw a girl with large gray eyes, and long black hair falling neatly down her shoulders. She reached her hand out to him.
"Eren, we should head back home," The boy sat there in confusion, staring at the girl for a moment.
"Mikasa? When did your hair get so long?" He grabbed her hand, lifting himself from the spot under the tree he had fallen asleep in. "Hmm, it feels like I just had the longest dream ever, I can't seem to remember it anymore though," He mumbled to himself.
"Huh?" She asked in confusion before turning to look at him again. His green eyes reflected in the sunlight like that of emeralds belonging to the most elegant of families. Short brown hair framed his face, falling messily into his eyes. A single tear dripped down his cheek, followed by a few more.
"Eren," She asked cautiously, "Why are you crying?" Eren paused for a moment before reaching his hand to his eyes, feeling his wet cheeks, a face of dazed confusion crossed his eyes before brushing it off and whipping his face on his sleeve.
“Don’t tell anyone I was crying, ok? It’s embarrassing,” He followed the girl.
She started walking away, "Mikasa! I mean it!" Eren called after her.
“Alright,” She said, a couple of steps ahead of him.
The two make their way down the large hill and back to their hometown, they were supposed to be home an hour ago. Mikasa made it very clear his mother wouldn't be pleased with the failure to follow directions. He checked his phone and read the time, 7:46. She was right, his mom wanted them home by six-thirty. He slipped his phone back into his pocket and went to catch up with his sister. She was still rambling on about how they would get scolded when they got back, Eren didn't want to worry about anything now. He still couldn't shake the feeling of uneasiness after he awoke from his strange dream. What was it about again?
As they walked ERen turned his attention to the old buildings looming ominously above, ready to topple over any minute. Lights began to shut on along the street corners, along with brightly glowing stoor signs flickering in the ever-darkening sky. Small puddles gathered in the lower parts of the uneven ground, pooling with mud and trash. Empty cans and bags littered the street. fluttering with the breeze.
As they walked through the streets of their city, a group of kids about their age came running past them with a jacket held high above their heads. The boys were laughing and shouting behind them.
"Dammit! Eren recognized the jacket they were holding. He looked behind him and ran after the kids. Mikasa mid-sentence turning in confusion, having paid no attention to the kids.
"Hey!" Eren yelled at the group of boys, all much taller than him. "Where the hell did you get that jacket?" The tallest boy threw the jacked down into a puddle, soaking it with muddy water and shoving Eren to the ground next to it. Eren not being one to give up easily jumped right back up and swung his fist at the boy who shoved him. He landed a solid hit on his cheek, splitting it open. The other two instinctively lunged at him, though only getting halfway there before Mikasa knocked them both off their feet.
"Mikasa!" Eren wined. "I can handle things on my own you know," The boys took one look at Mikasa and ran the other direction, leaving the jacket and Eren sitting in the muddy puddle.
"Cowards," Mikasa scoffed under her breath.
"Mikasa! How many times do I have to tell you that I can handle myself?" Eren complained, still sitting in the cold water.
"Because-" Mikasa was interrupted when a small blond-haired boy came running towards them, stumbling over his feet.
"Are you guys ok?" He plopped down next to Eren, wiping the mud off his face as best he could, Eren pushed him away. Scrunching his face with annoyance.
"We're fine," He huffed, "But what the hell was that all about?" The Blond-haired boy lowers his head. He reaches out for his jacket but Eren grabbed his hand.
"Armin, Why the hell are you letting those fucking assholes push you around like that?" Eren gripped Armin's wrist tighter. Armin winced, turning his gaze to the floor.
"Eren," Mikasa interrupted calmly, No swearing, And let him go," She offered her hands down to the two of them. Eren huffs, pushing his hands onto his knees refusing Mikasa's hand. Armin doing the same. Mikasa dropped her hands on her sides, turning her gaze to the jacket on the ground. Eren leaned down grabbing it and shaking some of the mud off.
"I can take my jacket back," Armin reached for the mud-covered jacket.
Eren pulled it out of his reach. "No way," he tosses his jacket at Armin instead, "Here, take mine. I'll wash yours at my home and bring it to you in the morning," Armin hesitantly grabbed Eren's jacket and placed it on his shoulders.
They walk in silence as the cool evening air flows through the streets. The smell of food stands closing up for the night filling the air with a sense of home. Mikasa kicked a rock in front of her, kicking it every time it came close. Eren's gaze was fixated on the sky above while Armin stared at the ground, hands in his pockets.
"Armin," Mikasa starts Breaking the silence, "Have you heard anything from your parents?" A hopeful tone laced her words.
Armin Armin stalls long enough for the rock Mikasa had kicked to meet them once again, "I don't know," He went silent again. one kick, two kicks, "They still aren't back," Mikasa gave him a sad look and walked in silence for a while longer, the street lights flickering on. Armin turned his head towards the sea, watching the sunset between houses.
"Damnit!" Eren yells out "If I could just join the damn Jaeger program I could get out of this hell hole. Then I could make a difference fighting these damn monsters. I mean, who the hell is stopping us from just up and leaving, huh?" Eren threw his arms out in frustration. Mikasa glared daggers at him, Armin stiffened.
"What?" Eren, who had not been listening now confused.
"Eren, maybe you should listen more to others than getting lost in your own thoughts," Mikasa scolded him.
"It's alright Mikasa," Armin pulls Eren's jacket tighter around him, "But Eren, don't you realize how dangerous that is?"
"Come on, you have to know there's no future for us here, I mean, we are right on the shore, a Kaiju could come and kill all of us right now," Eren gestured forcefully to the sea.
“But I like the sea,” Armin mumbled to himself, looking once more out at it.
"Eren you can't join the Jaeger program, you'll get killed," Mikasa chimed coldly, "Besides, they wouldn't want someone as weak as you anyway,"
"Hey! What the hell Mikasa?" Eren shouted, voice ringing down the barren streets. "I can fight!" He exclaimed, lifting up his thin arms.
"What're you kids doin' out here this late?" A familiar voice called from behind, "Isn't it by time you get ta bed?"
"Isn't it by time you get sober?" Eren mocked the older man, arms crossed tightly against his chest.
"Now Eren, that's no way to talk to y'r friend!" He playfully punched Erens's arm.
"Hannes, you’re drunk," Mikasa stated the obvious. His breath smelled strongly of whisky, coconut and wood burning the three of their noses.
"Well yeah, but it's not like that means anything," Hannes chuckled as he took another swig of whisky.
"What do you mean by that?" Eren turned his face up to look Hannes in the eyes, "A Kaiju could attack us right now and you would be too drunk to do anything about it!"
Shock painted his face, "I wouldn't have to do anything, that's the jaeger’s job," He points out towards sea As they look in that direction the TVs in the window display flicked to life, A news report on the Jaeger program humming from the old speakers.
"Captain Levi! commander Erwin!" reporters swarm two Jaeger pilots after they arrive back from a battle with a grade two Kaiju off the coast of Japan. "What can you tell us about the Kaiju?" The pilots in question, Captain Levi Ackerman and Commander Erwin Smith were some of the best pilots ever to live.
"Is the Jaeger program worth the millions of dollars of taxes?" the reporters pressed, shoving mics into their faces.
"Shut up already" The captain huffed coldly as he pulled his helmet off before walking away from the reporters. Though that didn't stop them from asking more questions. Many people were beginning to question the ability of the Jaeger program as more Kaiju have been breaching through the walls and taking down Jaegers. Though casualty rates of civilians have dropped drastically since the program was initiated, many people still question the high taxes and work of it.
"It's keeping you fools alive isn't it?"The captain barked into the mics, the reporters recoiled and the feed switched to another news reporter. The report was about the fear which has been instilled in the remaining popularity along the coast.
"Only the poor and completely insane stay here, it truly is a hell hole," Eren grumbled towards the screen.
"Those damn Jaeger pilots, thinking they're all that, an' shit," Hannes drunkenly slurred his words together, taking another swig, "Oh well, I gotta get back to my card game, you three get home safely a'ight?" Hannes tilted his head back to a table visible through a bar window, "Oh and Eren, say hello to your mother fer' me m’kay?"
"Yeah, sure thing." Eren half-heartedly mumbled back to him, before he stumbled back into the bar. Walking again in silence the dark now fully among them. The only thing illuminating the street where the overhead streetlights, flickering on and off sporadically.
They make their way down the road until it forks two ways. Armin starts in one direction before stopping, "Get home safe you two, it's dangerous at night," he pulled Eren's Jacket closer to his chest.
"You too Armin," Mikasa waved.
"I'll bring your jacket to you tomorrow if I see you, otherwise I'll bring it to school Monday," Eren lifted the jacket, cracked mud drying along with it.
Mikasa and Eren turned down the other street, old brick houses that lined the streets crumbling where they stand, the sidewalk chipped and worn from years of wear and Kaiju attacks. The two siblings walked in silence, as the clock struck eight. The stars quickly fade away as the clouds creep over the sky, stalking the night. Soon after the two arrived on their porch. the dim light shone in the hazy darkness, rain speckling the dry ground.
"Moms gonna kill us," Eren grumpily opened the door, walking into the dark and cold house, "We're home!" He shouted, voice echoing off the small room.
"Eren! Mikasa!" They could hear their mom's voice from the back of the house as she came running out from the back hallway. A light flicked on illuminating the small living room. "Where the hell have you two been? I couldn't get ahold of you, you know how bad cell reception is nowadays," She was waving her hands all over and almost hit Eren a few times. Honestly, he wouldn't be surprised if one of these days she did smack him while flailing her hands in exasperation. She was a kind but strict mother. She was also one who likes them home before curfew. His dad, however, was much less involved with them. He was mostly consumed with his work in his basement office. Eren and Mikasa were never allowed to go down there, he had all his "dangerous work stuff," down there. Eren didn't see the point of hiding all the equipment from them, after all, they were almost fifteen. But no, 'Your father is busy with his work, you can't disturb him now,' Ugh, Eren was sick of the constant control he got from his parents, sometimes he wished they would just leave him alone.
"Eren," His mom was standing with her arms crossed, "I asked you a question," Eren's mind went completely blank, he stood still, trying to remember what she had said. "Well, I'm waiting," She tapped her finger against her arm, a disappointed look on her face.
"Carla, honey, give the kids a break," Eren's dad walked in, locking the basement door behind him, "they’re kids after all."
"Grisha, look at Them! Eren is soaked and covered in mud, and Mikasa, well she seems fine, but that doesn't excuse you," Carla shook her head in exasperation. Grisha just chuckled.
"He's a kid Carla, what did you expect?" Mikasa took off her coat and shoes making her way to the counter to get an apple. Eren huffed and begrudgingly took off his shoes, placing them next to Mikasa's.
"Eren? Whose jacket is that? And why is it covered in so much mud?" She gestured to the jacket in Eren's arms, a perplexed look on her face.
"It's Armin's, It got muddy so I offered to wash it for him," He tossed the jacket in the washer before making his way next to his sister sitting quietly by the fruit bowl.
"How did it get that muddy?" Carla inquired.
"Just some dumb bullies, but I taught them a lesson!" Eren grabbed an apple from a bowl on the counter.
"Actually if I remember correctly Didn't you get shoved to the ground and I fend them off?" Mikasa raised an eyebrow at him.
"I landed a punch though!" Eren complained.
"You what? Eren you cant hit people no matter what they did," Carla looked tired. She placed her index finger and thumb on the bridge of her nose and sighed. Eren pouted, glancing at Mikasa. She looked like she was about to say something she probably shouldn't.
She took a breath, "Eren wants to join the Jaeger Program."
Eren gasped, "Mikasa! You told me you wouldn't tell them!" Eren was now standing, the stool falling loudly to the ground.
"No! I never said that!" Mikasa now on her feet too, stool wobbling as she stood.
"Eren!" Carla sounded hurt like the words were daggers to her heart. tears filled her eyes as she looked her son in his eyes. "You are never allowed to join those suicidal maniacs! They are not heroes! they are crazy people!" Eren took a step back.
"How the hell could you say that? They are the ones protecting us from those fucking demons! Without them, we'd all be dead!" Eren yelled loudly across the kitchen.
"Eren! Language!" Carla now livid.
His father joined the conversation, "Son, listen to your mother."
"What? How can you people sit here and think that the people who save us are crazy?" Eren was shouting; hands tightly clenched into fists.
"Eren, just sit back down. This is for your own good," Mikasa chimed in.
"No!" He shouts, "I'm going to join the Jaeger Program and none of you can't stop me!" Eren ran to the front door, sliding his shoes on, and running out the door, his mom's voice echoing out the front door. The rain heavy pellets on the quenched ground. HE couldn't remember the last time it had rained like this. Blocking out his mother's call for him he ran farther into the night.
The rain was a thick veil of wet. His hair sticking to his forehead; clothes clinging onto his frail frame. Eren lost track of where he was heading, not that he really had a specific place he wanted to go to in the first place. Soon he found himself on the beach far behind his house and the little city. The muffled pelting of the rain on sand filled his ears. Waves Crashing on to shore gushing onto his feet and into his shoes soaking his socks. He walked farther into the frigid water now lapping up his calves.
Tears fill his eyes as he looks out to sea. Eren vigorously rubbed at his eyes daring the tears to try and fall. He screamed out into the sea, covering his eyes in a last attempt to prevent the tears from falling. When he removed his hands his vision was blurred. Blinking a couple of times, he saw the waves moving strangely. He assumed it was just from the harsh winds of the storm, though he's never seen them do this before. His hair whipped against his face, stinging slightly.
"Eren!" Mikasa called out behind him, breathlessly, "Please, calm down," Eren turned, facing his sister who was bent over, hands on her knees trying to catch her breath. She too was soaked from the harsh rain.
"Why would you tell them?" Eren protested hands clenched tight into fists.
"Because-," a loud ear-splitting scream cut Mikasa off. Eren spun back to face where the sound had come from. the sea. Eren's eyes widened with fear. Just out of the reef stood a 60 meter Kaiju, gaining speed by the second. It screamed again, loud enough to rattle Eren's teeth. They both covered their ears, falling to the ground. Grains of sand winding their way into Eren's jeans.
The scream was like nothing they had ever heard before. Eren gasped, looking up to Mikasa, fear plastered on her face as she stared out to sea. Pushing himself off the ground, Eren stumbled over to her, pulling Mikasa to her feet.
"Mikasa!” he faced his sister, Run!" Eren grabs her hand pulling away from the beach.
"We need to get back home!" Eren shouted behind him. Sirens sounded throughout Shiganshina. Why were they only going off now? The sound of helicopters over head pounding into Eren's skull. Two large Jaegers dangle from wires connected to the helicopters. They were dropped at the shoreline, water splashing against their feet. The utter massiveness of the Jaegers entranced Eren.
The Kaiju met the two Jaegers just off the shore. Metal against flesh and the screeching of gears filled the air. Eren's head felt like it was going to explode. There was too much noise. They made it onto the main road now filled with civilians making a beak for the underground shelters.
"Oh my god," Mikasa stood still.
"Mikasa, What the hell, we have to-" Eren's blood ran cold. There were now three Kaiju. "Two against three," Eren murmured. The Kaiju's screams rattled the earth. embedding deep into Eren's mind.
"Mikasa, we have to get home!" Eren tried yelling out desperately to his sister. "Mikasa?" Eren turned, she was gone. His mind started to race, his heart sank deep into the pit of his stomach as his screams went unanswered. more Jaegers arrived from above, this time from a different direction. More screams from the beach. A chill ran down Eren's spine. He sprinted for his home, rain slicking the road.
People ran in every direction shoving and pushing past each other. Someone ran straight into Eren knocking him to the ground. The wet pavement harsh against his skin. His head bounced off the ground, every little rock impaling themselves into his pale skin. He gasped for breath, unable to move or breathe. He tried to force himself up but kept getting knocked down.
"Aghh!" He screamed in frustration and fear as he forced himself to his feet. He found his road and began down the winding path to his house. There were fewer people in this part of the neighborhood, now abandoned houses lined the streets, lights still on, stove alarms ringing through the night. Forgotten children’s toys littler the cracked street, his heart pounding with every step he took. Painful gasps filled his lungs as he turned towards his street.
"My house will be fine, I'll turn this corner and it'll be right here," His breath caught in his throat as he looked up to see one of the three Kaijus hurtling this way, a Jaeger having thrown it down to the ground, the kaiju crashed into a small group of houses. Eren stopped in his tracks. Eren gasped, his house was there. He pushed through the rain towards his house. Where his house had been before, now lay a Kaiju screeching into the air. A Loud scream filled the air, different from the Kaiju. bricks and other debris falling from the Kaiju's head and shoulders as it stood up stomping with immense speed towards the Jaeger. The screaming got louder, a blood curtailing scream, full of pain and fear. He wanted it to stop, fear welling up in his chest, it wasn't until he fell to his knees gasping for breath when he realized the screams were coming from him, his throat now raw. He looked up, the crushed remnants of his house lay in despair.
Eren raced to the ruins, a large support beam lay heavily against the front entrance. His family had to have gotten out safely, they had to be in the bunker already. As Eren approached his house, screams filled the air once more.
"Mom!" Eren runs to the crumbling remains of his house, his mother was pinned to the ground under loose debris which Eren quickly disposed of. "Mom, are you ok? Where's Dad? What’s happening?" Eren tries to lift the beam.
His mother struggling to breathe chokes out a few words, "Eren," She coughed "Eren go! Get out of here, get to Mikasa and run!" Her voice was short and rough, the beam only getting heavier by the minute, Eren's arms shaking as he tried desperately to lift the slippery beam.
"Eren! Mom!" Mikasa's voice cut through the rain. She came from the opposite direction as Eren had come from. Her eyes widened. She examined Eren’s tear-stained face, his shaking arms, and their mother lying helplessly under the support beam, dying. Carla's head dropped as she yelled out in pain. Mikasa sprung into action grabbing the other end of the beam, her small hands quivering under the weight. The wind whipping her long black hair against her cheeks, rain thundering against their ears. the defining sounds of battle echo in the thick, suffocating atmosphere.
"Eren! Mikasa!" Carla strained, her voice small and thin, "Run! Get the hell out of here! You need to run, please run!" The Desperateness of her tone sinking deep in like blades, the two had blood dripping from their hands as they still tried feverishly to lift the beam. "Oh god Eren! If you ever listen to me just once, listen now!" Her screams blurred in the booming rain.
"We're not leaving you!" Eren screamed back, tugging at the beam. Wood splintered into his hand's blood dripping from his fingers. 'I have to save her, this is my fault, If I had stayed she wouldn't be here under this damn beam' Eren cried out in pain.
"Eren! I can't lift it any further," Mikasa's broken voice shattering any hope Eren had left.
"Carla!" It was Hannes. Eren gasped in relief, he could save her.
"Hannes! Quick, take the kids, get them to safety! Forget about me!" Carla cut in before Eren could say anything.
"No! We're not leaving you!" Eren cried desperately. Mikasa quivering under the weight.
"What? Eren's right Carla, I can't just leave you here," Hannes tried to help lift the beam but it still wouldn't budge, "Damnit!" The three lifted with everything they had, and the board started to lift off Carla, her gasping breaths joined in the many noises which flooded Eren's brain. Just as she was almost free, what Eren assumed to be a Kaiju stumbled back towards them.
"Hannes!" Carla shouted, pain lacing her voice. Hannes turned upwards, a large mass was hovering over them. "Run!" Carla pushed Hannes away from the beam. It landed hard on her chest.
"No! Were so close, why did you stop?" Eren gasped in pain.
"Eren," Mikasa's voice small in the storm, "Look," her head was pointed upward towards the sky. Eren turned his face to see a large mass looming over them.
"I'm sorry Carla," Hannes grabbed Eren and Mikasa away from the beam, slinging Mikasa under one arm and Eren over the other.
"Hannes! You idiot, what the hell are you doing! My mom-" Eren tried but Hannes interrupted,
"Eren it's over," His voice cracked and broke as he spoke, running away from the house. "It's no use," As he spoke those last words Eren turned back to his mother.
"Stay alive!" her words echoed in Erens's mind as the large mass came crashing down on the house. her head... All Eren could hear were the screams of pure panic and terror, echoing through his head like thunder, those screams, his screams.
He screamed all the way to the shelters, sobs wracking his body. He pounded his fists into Hannes' back. Hannes tossed the two of them on the ground.
"What the hell is wrong with you!" Eren screamed, voice horse. Tears streamed down his face, his nose ran down his chin.
"Eren," Mikasa's voice was barely above a whisper.
"I could have saved her! Why did you make us leave?" wiped at his nose smearing tears and snot on his sleeve.
"You couldn't save your mother because you were weak," Hannes blatantly stated. outraged Eren goes to swing another hit at Hannes, but he catches it and continues, "I couldn't save your mother because I was too much of a coward. If I hadn't run away from the fight I would have been able to get to you sooner. I'm sorry," Hannes turned his head down in remorse, tears rolling down his face.
They walked in silence to the bunker, escorting them the whole way. Eren replayed the scene of his mother's head rolling down the broken steps. Her hair plastered to her face and the ground around it. What had happened? What had crushed her?
"I'm gonna kill them all," Eren gritted his teeth, "Every last one of them,"
"Eren," Mikasa whispered. It seemed she didn't know what else to do but say his name.
"I'm joining the Jaeger program. And then I'm gonna Kill every dam Kaiju that dares to walk this wretched earth. And you can't stop me," Eren stared at Mikasa in the eyes.
meeting his gaze she replied, "I know, I'm going to join them too," Eren wanted to complain, more than anything he wanted to kick and scream and protest against her joining the Jaeger program, but he knew it would all be in vain. instead, he laughed to himself and turned his gaze to the cold metal floor. Tremors shook the room around him. Eren sank to the floor staring at his bruised and bloody hands. Only one thought formed in his mind.
'why?