Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Dabi was pissed. Exasperated.

Vexed, even.

“Twice, Twice, Twice,” Toga whispers harshly, rapidly patting the man next to her to get his attention while not moving her eyes from the scene in front of her, “take a picture right now.”

“Don’t even think about it.” Dabi hisses at the both of them. He liked to think he was a patient man, when it came to the League of Villains, but he certainly did not consider himself a good one and was not above incinerating a phone if it came to it.

Maybe he should do it regardless, to get his point across.

“Nah, I’m out.” Spinner mutters, lifting from his position on the floor and abandoning the room before the situation escalated.

Yeah, Dabi should destroy their phones. Just as soon as he got up. Whenever that’s going to be.

Seeming to sense his thoughts, Compress splays out his hand towards them, “You know, you could just move him.” Dabi doesn’t respond to that beyond a glare shot towards the older man.

“No, he can’t, that would be rude as fuck.” Toga gasps out in indignation. Dabi silently agreed with her. That would be rude. But you know what else is rude? Passing out on top of a dangerous villain who only brought you to a meeting in the first place to spread false information. Jesus Christ, what kind of spy even is this idiot? For weeks the hero had been on his ass about being brought to a meeting. And the first one, the very first one Hawks is invited to, he falls asleep 15 minutes in. Not only that, but he passes out directly onto Dabi’s torso.

Dabi should light those pretty wings on fire just for the hero’s fucking audacity. He glances down at Hawks again. The man’s lips are slightly parted, face relaxed and stupid grin nowhere to be found. With every exhale, there’s a slight whistle, almost inaudible even as close as he is to the man. Hawks’ hand is raised up by his nose, fingers lightly curled into Dabi’s white shirt.

He should definitely light Hawks up for this. Dabi twitches his nose and looks away. “This is ridiculous.” He mutters.

“Aw, just let him sleep. He’s clearly exhausted. Yeah! Who the hell would fall asleep on you otherwise!” Dabi knocks his head onto the couch’s back and closes his eyes, doing his best to ignore Twice’s second comment. It wasn’t unfounded, considering his relationship with the hero. You know, considering he had shot flames at Hawks with murderous intent more than a couple times. Which begged the question, how tired was Hawks?

Contrary to the persona he fed the public, Hawks thought of himself as a smart man. His work was dangerous, and his training was intensive. He could dissect a situation and come up with the best solution in a matter of seconds. He knew how to read people, how to deescalate situations, knew exactly when to dive and when to bank left. His brain worked faster than the average person’s, it had to, when he had hundreds of feathers to split his attention between.

Which is why, the second he had a shred of consciousness, he knew he had fucked up. He immediately starts to replicate his sleeping behaviors. He knew his sleeping behaviors, the commission made him study videos of himself for hours until not a single one of his handlers could tell the difference. Hawks keeps his hand by his face, careful to keep his fingers relaxed but latched on. His other arm is numb, trapped between his side and the couch’s back. He leaves it, not risking the movement giving him away. It wouldn’t matter anyway, Hawks knew how to fight with limbs that had fallen asleep.

He counts to sixty in his head ten times. When he hears no movement, talking, or change of breathing, he cracks an eye open. The room is dark. Fuck. Fucking fuck, in fact. How could he have made a mistake like this? Why did they let him? What time is it? Has the commission tried to contact him? How on God’s green Earth did he fall asleep on a serial arsonist of all people? And how is he not another victim for it?

Well… these questions were only going to be resolved one way. Closing his eye again, he takes a deep breath and lets out a quiet sigh, shifting both his arms closer to his stomach. He feels Dabi shift as well, more than likely looking down at him. Hawks shakes his wings slightly, feathers rustling together. “About time, Tweety.” Hawks lets himself jerk back slightly at the villain’s raspy voice. He yawns and rubs at his eyes.

“Wha-? What’s going on?” He slurs out before dropping his hands into his lap and pulling back completely from Dabi. He meets his blue eyes just in time to see them narrow in annoyance as he scowls down at him. Uh oh.

“What’s going on?” Dabi hisses at him, voice dangerously low, “what’s going on is that your muttle ass passed out on me seconds into a meeting I graciously allowed you to. I thought you were serious about this, hero.”

“You shouldn’t say that word, ‘s not nice.” Well that’s not what he meant to say, he needed to look away from those eyes and focus. He kept eye contact.

“….hero?” Dabi’s dangerous scowl shifts into a confused one. Hawks couldn’t hold back his snort.

“ah- no, you know what? Nevermind, Dabs.” If there’s one thing Hawks has learned from villains in his career, it’s that they really didn’t have an aversion to any specific words when they were spitting insults at the heroes that took them down. There’s not really a line to not cross when you’ve taken up a life of crime and murder, apparently. The League of Villains probably wasn’t any different. He’d have to pay more attention to their word choices when speaking. The commission would be disappointed he hadn’t picked up on it yet. In his defense, Dabi hasn’t allowed him much contact with the others in the months it took to get here. Which circled him back to his current problem. It took months of late nights, useless errands, and jumping through various hoops from both Dabi and the commission to get here. And he falls asleep.

God, the commission was not going to let this slide. They never let anything slide, but that’s besides the point. Maybe he can still get the information and spin it as if he purposefully fell asleep to play up his angle of being clueless and non-threatening. Nah, they would ask why he didn’t pretend to be asleep if that was the case. “Anyway, I am serious about this, Hotstuff. You just wouldn’t believe the patrol shifts they put me on. Ridiculous hours and all that.” Hawks doesn’t meet his gaze as he pats his pockets to locate his phone.

Ah, that’s a lot of missed calls from his handler. Hawks does his best to completely ignore the ball of dread in his stomach as it begins to crawl up his lungs and pockets his phone once again. He doesn’t bother checking the time. Late is late to them, it really doesn’t matter if it’s one minute or three hours.

The best plan he has now is to bring them information they would have use for.

He looks back up at the villain, whose expression hasn’t changed from vicious annoyance. “So…. what’d I miss?” Hawks bites the inside of his lip, cringing slightly to portray a bashful attitude. Dabi’s eyes narrow even further as he makes no move to answer. “Come on man, I really didn’t mean to bail on everyone like that. You guys ever consider getting a coffee pot for these meetings? Every other meeting I go to has one. Or like, donuts.” Not that he’s ever had a donut. Fried food is not part of his meal plan.

“Oh I’m sorry, Birdass, next time I’ll be sure to take your snack requests ahead of time. We wouldn’t want to not be on par with your hero gatherings. Of course, that means there would have to be a next time,” Dabi says as he raises from his position on the couch. He raises his arms above his head and stretches out his back. Hawks takes the opportunity to eye the flash of pale, unmarred skin at his belt line.

Hawks watches him step away before flopping back onto the couch cushions. People were more willing to talk when they felt in control of the situation. It was the number uno cause of villain monologues. Time to go for a more sincere approach. “Ah don’t be like that, Dabi. I’m sorry, alright? Those HPSC assholes really are working me to the quill here, even without my secret secondary job. Which just means the faster the League accomplishes its goal, the faster I can take more naps in my bed at home instead of your lovely, comfortable chest.” He winks at Dabi over the back of the couch and the villain sneers at him before stalking to the bar.

Not too sincere, that’s not his style.

He pushes himself back up to keep Dabi in his line of sight. “Just fly home, Hero. If it’s necessary, I’ll text what you need to know.” Oh no, no, no, no thank you.

“Man, don’t-“ He’s cut off immediately.

“Get. Out.” Dabi growls, back turned towards him. The temperature in the room raises noticeably. Okay, so he pissed him off somewhere in that. Hawks raises from his seat and hesitates where he stands before heading for the door. Once again, he pauses with his hand on the doorknob before sighing quietly and exiting the room into a dingy hallway. He clenches his jaw and looks in the opposite direction of the scurrying sounds of a mouse to his left. Kurogiri is waiting for him outside the room. Hawks nods at him but neither say a word as the hero steps into the swirling black that opens in front of him. When his vision clears, he quickly takes in the environment he was dropped into. Yet another gross alleyway, in Bulot district no less.

He could make it back to the commission in thirty minutes from here at his top speed, less if the tailwind was in his favor. That would give him enough time to prepare for this meeting. He tries not to think too much about it.

In the end, Hawks is grateful that he’s able to fly to his balcony. More often than not the hero is forced to rely on the elevator when coming back from similar sessions. There’s something to be said there, that his time with the commission is more likely to send him on a walk of shame up the stairs than any of his patrol routes.

Well, maybe that’s not too crazy. It is easier to shoot a deer when it sits still for you, after all.

He stumbles to the glass sliding door, leaning on it perhaps a bit too heavily. He fumbles with the handle far too long, squeezing his eyes shut multiple times to clear away his blurred vision. It doesn’t work but he does manage to yank the door open. He takes one step onto the hardwood before his legs give out and he crashes violently onto his hands and knees. “As good a spot as any, I guess,” Hawks mutters before slumping onto his side. His cheek presses into the cold mahogany wood floorboards. “Dabi’s chest was way more comfortable than you are. Warmer, too.” He says, maybe a tad too full of spite for an inanimate object, as his eyes slide shut.

“No need to get snippy at the floor.” Hawks isn’t proud of it, but he shrieks. With a seemingly impossible burst of adrenaline, he shoves himself off his side and onto his back as he stares at the villain lurking above him. Said villain looks far too amused at the current situation. Unfortunately, the last bit of energy Hawks had stored in his body was used up by the quick movement and he can’t get his brain to catchup and formulate a response. He settles for blinking dumbly up at Dabi. “What? Cat got your tongue, Little Bird?” Dabi stalks closer and nudges his propped-up knee. Hawks doesn’t even have the energy to fight the pull of gravity and lets it fall flat. Dabi purses his lips, “really though, you can’t make it your bed even after your not-so-little power nap earlier?”

Hawks lets out a weak chuckle, “Hey, what’d I say about those ridiculous patrol hours. I’m pooped already.”

“You weren’t on patrol.” Dabi deadpans, eyes narrowing. Right, Hawks wasn’t on nights this week and Dabi knew that. Maybe he shouldn’t have teased Dabi about being a paranoid boyfriend and texted him his schedule.

“Uh, yeah. I- I meant, shit give me a second to think.” Dabi was slowly turning into three people and Hawks didn’t think he could handle half a Dabi right now, given the state of his exhausted mind.

“Why, so you can get your lies together? Go right ahead, Hero.” This isn’t going well, but shit can you blame him? It’s a miracle Hawks didn’t find a nice tree to pass out in on the way and now he’s expected to hold a conversation? A conversation filled with twisted lies, no less.

“No, no, no, you’re right I wasn’t on patrol. But the commission did call me in to take care of something. Honestly, I don’t separate the two in my mind. Walk the streets and handle bullshit for civilians or walk the halls and handle bullshit for my agency.”

“I thought you were at the commission, not your agency.” Dabi didn’t phrase it as a question. Maybe Hawks should just knock himself out at this point. It really wouldn’t take much.

“I was. See it’s kind of complicated, man. The HPSC owns my agency so a lot of what I do bottlenecks there.” Hawks hadn’t checked in a while if his apartment was bugged. He prayed to any god that was listening that he wasn’t, or he was a dead chick walking.

Dabi eyebrows furrow, and a cute little wrinkle pops up. “They can’t own private agencies, that’s illegal.”

“I know right? Wouldn’t it be cool if they gave a fuck?” Hawks laughs quietly at his own joke before clearing his throat when Dabi doesn’t react. Right, dangerous villain who he pissed off earlier that somehow found his apartment is standing over his limp body. “Listen, Dabs, I think you’re the last person in the world who needs to hear about corruption. The commission does some sketchy shit at sketchy hours and I go when they whistle.” Ok Hawks, bring it back in. That’s a little deeper than he planned to go.

“’Cause you’re their little bird that can’t fly away.” Dabi’s face relaxes slightly as he references one of their first conversations.

“Exactly, Hotstuff. And this bird is about to pass out so pretty please don’t murder me, please, I’m sorry for using you as a pillow.” Hawks has just enough time to see each of the five Dabis in front of him raise an eyebrow before his white ceiling turns to black.

Chapter Text

Oh God, please let him out. He can’t do this for any longer. His entire body is burning, heart pounding so rapidly he’s truly afraid it’s going to stop. Please, he can’t breathe. He can’t, he can’t, can’t, can’t, can’t, can’t, can’t.

He screams as water surges through his entire world.

Hawks makes no sound as he’s thrown back into his body. He learned long ago how to be quiet. Well, usually, but who can blame him for having his guard down on his own living room floor? He blinks a couple times and shifts his head away from the puddle of drool that’s formed on the floor before pushing himself up to his knees with a low whine.

God, every muscle in his body feels tighter than a violin string.

“Did you get hit by an airplane or what, Birdy?” This time, Hawks is ready for the low drawl of Dabi’s voice. Hawks knowns his own life too well to expect the dangerous sociopath in his apartment to leave after he passed out on the floor.

The hero gets himself to his feet with one strong flap of his wings, no way in hell was he going to rely on his leg muscles to move him. In fact, his wings are the only part of his body not feeling as if it’s going to literally snap in half if he breathes too hard. “Aw, you concerned about me, Hotstuff?”

Dabi snorts. “Concerned about your fancy hardwood floors and the pool of spit you left on it. Also, you’re moving as if All Might did a Detroit Smash up your ass. I want to know why.” Hawks cringes at the wording used and glances once at the villain sprawled on his couch before eyeing the long trek he has ahead of him to the kitchen.

He huffs and gnaws the inside of his cheek before stepping forward, sending out a feather ahead of him to get napkin and clean up his nap spot. No way in Hell was he making that walk back and then bending over. Nope. “I told you, I was at the Commission.”

“At the Commission doing what, getting hit by planes?” Dabi tilts his head a bit, raising his eyebrows at the hero.

“It’s just… training. Nothing I’m not used too but sometimes it’s amped up when I don’t have patrol the next day, alright? Oh hey, thanks for not murdering me by the way.”

“Don’t thank me yet, Pretty Bird, jury is always out on that one. What kind of training has you out of commission like this?” Dabi’s eyes don’t leave his back as he opens the fridge.

Hawks picks out one of the pre-cooked meals at random and picks a fork off his drying rack before picking at the cold meal. “Endurance training.”

He can’t, he can’t, he can’t, please someone God help him, he needs help, let him out

“Doing what,” Dabi growls out. God, why does he keep pushing this. Okay, okay, change the subject. He knows how to misdirect.

Hawks shrug, “Just muscle failure exercises without the use of my wings.” He spreads his wings behind him, hardening a few and shaking them so the light catches on them. Dabi’s eyes track the movement. “Hey, dude, why the Hell are you even here anyway. How long have you been here? How did you find it?”

Dabi’s eyes flick back to his face. “How? Wouldn’t you like to know. You heroes are ridiculous, thinking you have any clue how to be covert.” Hawks eyes flick up from his steamed vegetables and basmati rice to meet his impossibly blue ones. He doesn’t let himself hesitate before answering, hesitation is never a good sign.

“Aye, coverts really not my style with the wings and all. I do what I can. Which is why I really appreciate the late meetings in empty, creepy-ass warehouses. But hey, you didn’t answer-“

“Shut up.” Dabi finally stands from the couch and stalks towards him, hands in pockets. Hawks straightens up and set his fork down. “Anyone ever tell you you talk too much, Birdy?” The villain tilts his head at him.

Shut. Your. Mouth. Boy. It is not your place to question us.

“Nah.” Hawks blinks up at the taller man, keeping his eyes slightly widened. He knows how to look frightened. “I don’t think I really talk all that much, I think you’re just-“ Dabi shuts him up once again by reaching out and grabbing his jaw. His hold is gentle, but firm, hands too warm. Hawks doesn’t react outwardly. He knows how to handle threats grabbing him.

He can’t, however, control how his heart starts pounding.

Dabi tilts his chin up, eyes flicking to his lips then back to his golden eyes. “Hm. You know, I’ve never actually noticed you don’t have normal pupils.” Hawks doesn’t respond, doesn’t even think to. He’s not supposed to talk when they grab him. A thumb traces his jawline and it takes everything he has to not start shaking. His wings are pinned tightly against his back. This isn’t good. He doesn’t know what he did to piss the villain off so much. Doesn’t know why he’s acting like this. Doesn’t know how to alleviate his mistake. Doesn’t know how Dabi does corrections.

Hawks doesn’t know what to do.

Dabi huffs out a laugh and releases him with a jerk of his wrist. “Relax, Birdy. You look like you’re about to pass out on the wood again.” Hawks doesn’t move from his position, arms lax by his side. He knows not to show signs of anything that can be perceived as a threat. They always look for that. Hawks keeps his eyes straight forward.

The villain steps past him, flicking the Tupperware container. “Why are you eating that?”

He…what? What’s going on?

After a moment, Hawks turns to watch Dabi’s back. “I’m, uh, hungry?”

Dabi glances over his shoulder at the hero. “Are you asking me? No, idiot, I want to know why you’re eating soggy and cold string beans.”

Okay, Hawks has no idea what’s going on. He doesn’t like not understanding a situation. How did he provoke Dabi so suddenly, and why did Dabi drop it without correction? He needs to understand. He needs to get himself together to think.

“Because I’m…. hungry.” Hawks can feel the annoyance rolling off the villain as he starts open cabinets at random.

“Fucking, birdbrain, I’m questioning your choice of food, that looks disgusting. Yo, where the fuck is all your shit. Who the Hell has only one mug?” The last part is muttered to himself. He lives alone, why would he need more than one mug? Hawks doesn’t recall even using that mug before, is he supposed to get more? Do normal people have more than one mug?

“Um, I don’t know, I’m on a… diet. Why are you interrogating me about my living decisions?” Hawks was genuinely confused. His handlers always approved of his living conditions when he had house checks. Hawks was proud of that. What does Dabi want from him?

But, Dabi isn’t a handler. Not really. Hawks needs to recollect himself. This situation is making his head spin. Why is the arsonist portraying himself as a handler but not following through on anything? Maybe the League does this differently. That’s not good, now he has to learn their rules too and adjust between them and the Commission.

Dabi opens his refrigerator and mutters out a quiet “What the fuck” at the sight of an absolutely empty fridge aside from exactly enough pre-prepared meals to cover every time he would be home for a meal for the next two weeks. They were each labeled with a day, approximate time, and the vitamins he needs to take with it. “Literally what the Hell is wrong with you. Are these all vegetables and carbs? Are you vegan or something?”

“Vegan? No, this is just what I’m supposed to eat.” Hawks shifts uncomfortably. The Commission told him to do whatever it took to earn Dabi’s trust, but they were super strict about his appearance. There’s no way they’d flat out allow a diet change if that’s what Dabi wanted. He’d have to make up for it somehow to correct the adjustments made.

Dabi shoves the containers around as if looking for something. “I’m no nutritionist, but how is it even remotely healthy to have no protein or fat in your diet, especially with your hero bullshit. You’re already tiny as fuck.”

Hawks sputters in indignation. “I am not tiny. And vegetables have protein too. Like, broccoli. I think.” Dabi finally closes the fridge and turns to look at him as if he’s being ridiculous.

“Birdy, I’m fairly certain if you lost the wings not a single person in Japan would believe you’re old enough to be a license student, let alone a pro hero. Eat more chicken or something. Aren’t you a bird of prey anyway?” Dabi looks genuinely curious.

Hawks turns and stabs violently at his rice, failing to pick up more than a few grains and glaring down at the food as if it’s insulted him. “My quirk is an emission. I’m not a mutant and I don’t have bird traits.” He hears Dabi scoff behind him.

“I thought you agreed to be honest with me, Keigo.” Dabi’s voice is dark, dangerous. Hawks drops his fork onto the quartz countertop as his entire body locks up. He keeps his eyes forward and doesn’t blink.

Keigo. Keigo. Keigo. Keigo. Keigo. Keigo. Hawks, this is you new room. Hawks, you will address me as ma’am and ma’am only. Hawks, do you understand. Hawks. Keigo. Keigo. Hawks.

Keigo. Who is Keigo.

Hawks. No. What?  Who is Keigo?

Hawks clenches and unclenches his cramping fingers, but he can’t force himself to move an inch to face the man behind him.

“You’re wondering how I know who you are. How I found your apartment. How I got in. Frankly, Birdy, it doesn’t matter.” Dabi sounds way too pleased with himself at having caught the hero completely off guard. Hawks can barely acknowledge it over the absolute screeching of his brain. The dark-haired man hovers behind him, bends forward over Hawks’ scrunched tight wings to whisper in his ear. “I don’t like having things kept from me, Little Bird. So, I always get the information I want.” Hawks can hardly remember to inhale as Dabi’s words curl like talons into his veins. He feels him step back. “Boss wants to know about the vigilantes in Kyoto. Don’t fuck it up, Tweety.”

By the time Hawks comes back into his body, his muscles feel just like the night before, and his apartment is empty.

Dabi was absolutely fucking with Hawks, and he found every minute of it hilarious. Everything the hero did was so meticulous and flawless. Frankly, it brought him a vicious type of pleasure to continually knock him off his feet and give him whiplash. There was no secret source of information Dabi could fall back on to dig up dirt on everyone. That’s ridiculous. He meant what he said, heroes are not nearly as sneaky as they believe themselves to be.

Every hero had specific patrol routes, and their agencies were based where they lived for the most part. There were few directions Hawks flew in consistently. The commission building, his agency, and one other. That direction had no homes, just the occasional apartment building. It didn’t take too much work to go the tallest, most expensive one, and go to the top floor that had a large balcony with an unlocked door and red feathers scattered across the living room area. First try. Sometimes he was lucky.

And his name? Well, Dabi knew that the same reason he knew Hawks was lying about his quirk. He had met the man back when he was someone else, something else. Before the commission managed to tear apart Takami Keigo to create the Winged Hero: Hawks. Dabi knew Hawks when he was just a child swearing to him with tears in his eyes that he would become a hero everyone in the world could trust.

It almost hurt Dabi, to see that child with the sun in his eyes become a porcelain songbird tangled in strings. Almost. He never had high expectations for heroes.

Chapter Text

Without question, Hawks favorite part of this job was rescuing people. Nothing ever beat the look on their faces as they spotted him and knew they were safe.

Hawks liked it when people trusted him to protect them.

He tucked his wings in and fell into a nosedive, chasing after the screaming woman. As he grew closer, his wings spread slightly to catch the air and create resistance and slow the hero from his trademark speed. When the civilian was within reach, Hawks spread his wings completely and reached out. The second he had a grip on her arm, he pulled her to him and rolled so his back was to the ground, clutching her to his chest. He paused for a second to change momentum and shot straight upwards.

Ha. Not even close to the ground.

Keeping his eyes on the villain, he drops the poor woman off next to a rooftop exit. With a grin and two-fingered salute, he’s rocketing back towards his current predicament. The villain had some kind of arachnid quirk along with a nasty habit of launching civilians into the air to keep Hawks away from him. He was more than capable of sending a feather to catch them and bring them down to safety, but he knew this man had a venom ability as well, so he needed to be careful about how he used his feathers. It was only the start of his patrol after all.

The second his sidekicks reported the area empty and secure, Hawks narrowed his eyes and shot straight for the man. The villain snarled something unintelligible at him and shot one stream of webbing straight at his face and the other to latch onto the next building to swing away. It was almost an afterthought to barrel roll to avoid the stream, golden eyes not straying from his prey once. The distance was closing fast. In the villain’s panic, his next spray missed widely, and his other web took too long to reach its target, dropping the man into a low arc.

Too easy.

Hawks dropped his altitude as he sent out one sharpened feather far out of the villain’s range. The man shrieked as his anchor was cut and he began to drop out of the sky. Before he could readjust, Hawks was already closing in. The winged hero tucked his head in and slammed into him, shoulder into stomach. His arms wrapping around the villain’s midsection. He went limp in his arms, out cold.

He’d be fine. Had Hawks pulled the same move at his top speed there’s no doubt the spider villain would be dead. But that wasn’t his goal, that was never his goal.

Hawks paused the movement of his wings and only caught himself once he was a few feet from the ground. He touched down gently and grinned brightly at the officers. “Ayo! Delivery!” Two people stepped forward and carried the man to an ambulance while locking cuffs on him.

“Hawks, a quick takedown with no casualties, as always. Every day I wonder how I got so lucky to have you as this city’s guardian.” The sergeant grins in him and Hawks can’t help the bubbly feeling in his chest at the praise.

He shoves his hands in his flight jacket’s pockets and cocks his head to the side with a lazy grin. He wanted to close his eyes and preen at the compliment so bad.

But Hawks knew how to act cocky.

“Aw, Sarge, you flatter me too much. That’s the brand I gotta keep up. I like to solve problems fast enough that there was no problem. You can count on me!” Hawks smiles at the officers and gives a mock salute before shooting back into the sky. He wanted to go through the clouds. He knew he supposed to stay visible.

Waving at the nearby news helicopter with a grin genuine enough to put even villains at ease, he returns to his assigned route for today. Hawks knew he was always supposed to smile at the cameras.

After sending out feathers to keep watch for him, Hawks pulls out the burner phone given to him by Dabi all those months ago.

H: 'Wassup Hotstuff, I got somethin for you :)

Dabi responds almost immediately, likely already on his phone.

D: 'You seem back on your bullshit, Feathers.'

H: 'Bullshit? :( what’s that mean'

D: 'Means a couple days ago I finally got to see the real Hawks, and it’s not this.'

H: 'The real Hawks? Haha dude come on, you threw me off a little is all'

H: 'Anyone in my situation would have acted the same'

D: 'What situation is that?'

H: 'Well if we’re being honest with each other, exhausted and caught off guard by a powerful villain.'

D: 'Seems to me you should be more concerned about the villains you meet on patrol.'

H: 'I know what they want and my role to play. I’m less sure about you, Firecracker.'

D: 'What’s to worry about? We are on the same side after all. Right, Hero?'

H: ' We are'

H: 'And as soon as you believe that maybe we can take more naps together ;)'

There’s a long enough pause this time that Hawks sighs and is about to put his phone away before a vibration makes him scramble to look back at the screen.

D: 'Maybe buy me dinner before all that.'

H: 'You hungry? I can bring something when I bring over the goody goods'

D: 'I don’t want your bird seed shit.'

H: 'Nah, I gotchu Dabs :)'

D: 'Why do you text like a prepubescent boy.'

H: '>:( '

D: '.......'

D: 'Usual spot'

Hawks breathes a sigh of relief. He half expected the villain to show up at his apartment again. There was nothing for him to hide there, the Commission doesn’t let him handle anything like that, but he did not want Dabi searching through his stuff again. Hawks didn’t know exactly why but having Dabi look at the way he lived made him deeply uncomfortable. He didn’t want to hear the man’s opinion of the way he lived. What did his thoughts matter anyway, it was Hawks’ house and the Commission approved of it.

Hawks hated winter. Birds were supposed to leave when it was warm. Yet, here he was, on a dingy rooftop in the dead of night. The silence made him shiver.

He’d rather burn alive than have to stand out here much longer. Actually, considering who Hawks was currently waiting to meet-

“Universe, I did not mean that literally at all,” He mutters at the starless sky. The crunch of gravel behind him has him gracefully spinning on his heel to face the sound. “Why are you always late?” Hawks drags out the last word with a whine.

Dabi rolls his eyes and sticks his hands in his coat’s pockets. Hawks’ eyes latch onto the staples in his wrist at the movement. “Why do I always find you talking to yourself?” He shoots back without pause, clearly not looking for an answer.

“Stop being mean to me. I brought you food, and you’re mean to me.” Hawks pouts at him. Dabi’s lips twitch up in a smile before he sniffs and flattens his mouth again.

Ha, I saw that.

Dabi steps closer and grabs the bag held out to him. He looks almost comical with the bright yellow smiley face on the plastic. Hawks wants to laugh but knows better. “Tonkatsu?”

“And miso soup! Plus there’s extra tofu on the side. I really don’t know what your diets like and I felt like this was a good range…. is it okay?” Hawks runs his hand up and down his arm. Both a nervous gesture and a sad attempt to warm himself up.

The villain lowers the food to hang in his hand limply and is quiet as he looks Hawks up and down before searching his face. “Uh huh. People like me aren’t picky. Can’t be, unlike you heroes.”

Okay, Hawks was the opposite of picky when it came to food, thank you very much. He never once complained to his handlers about his diet. Hawks knew better.

Dabi turns on his heel and begins walking away. “You have the folder, right? Come. Toga has been pissing me off asking about you. Don’t disappoint her again.” Hawks has to blink a few times before jolting into action, quickly heading after the villain.

They’re walking to the base? Oh. Oh, good. His handlers were furious when he told them he was taken in through teleportation and dumped somewhere random afterwards. Finally, he’ll have something to report.

The walk was entirely too long, why would he even choose a meeting location so far away if they were just going to end up in their base? Unless, Dabi didn’t initially plan to take him there. If that was the case, what could have made Dabi change his mind? The food? No, he should have expected that after their text conversation.

He saw you were cold. A traitorous voice whispered in his head. As if. Dabi giving a single fuck if he was cold was less likely than the villain just trying to get his daily steps in the middle of the night. Why would he care if Hawks was cold?

Eventually they end up in a rather populated part of the city. The streets aren’t filled like Fukuoka, but there’s absolutely nothing covert or secretive about the flashing neon signs and the roar of cars speeding through. Dabi takes him up through the back door of a tall building that appears to be housing a rather popular club on the first two floors. As they go up through the stairwell, the sound of muffled music drops off even for his sensitive hearing.

At the top of the building Dabi finally pushes open a thick metal door labeled “fire exit, keep door closed.”. Hawks finally recognizes their surroundings once they step into the hallway. This is where Kurogiri had teleported him out.

Hawks heart rate picks up as they approach the wooden door. If Dabi truly had only brought him here because he saw Hawks was freezing half to death-

He wouldn’t, why the hell would he care about that, about you

-then the league wouldn’t be expecting Hawks to make an appearance. There’s no telling how they would react to him showing up in their home without warning. He assumed this was their home, anyway. He can’t imagine they would have a meeting spot in the middle of a city where they would constantly have to walk in and out of the building.

As soon as the door creeks open, Hawks get’s the answer to his question.

“Dabi’s back! Oh my god, he brought Hawks!” Toga excitedly screeches out his name at her top volume and vacates her seat to sprint across the room at him. The hero blinks in confusion at her but doesn’t miss the glint of metal in her hand. This was certainly a different reaction than last time. Way more energy, but Hawks didn’t exactly know what he did to earn her excitement given all he did at their initial meeting was pass out.

First impressions were supposed to be important.

“Stab him and I will burn all of your skirts.” Dabi says absent mindedly as he makes his way to the bar and sets the takeout container on it. Toga stops in her tracks to glare at the dark-haired man.

“You wouldn’t, I wouldn’t have anything to wear and then you’d have to go buy me something.”

“Yeah, I’d steal you some pants. Ugly ones, too.” Toga huffs at him in anger before turning back towards the hero still hovering by the door. His eyebrows raise as her eyes once again fill with excitement looking at him. She lunges forward and grasps his gloved hand, raising it up with both of hers.

“Dabi’s such a mood killer. You’d look so good covered in blood. The clash of your golden eyes and white-blonde hair with the deep red... I want to see it!” She smiles at him, fangs poking out. Hawks pauses to make sure he heard that right before chuckling softly at her. Mr. Compress turns his head to him at the sound.

Hawks knows her quirk, how it works. Dabi’s expectation of the desired stabbing along with her fangs appearing makes the situation clear. Her quirk gives her a desire for blood. Hawks could sympathize with desiring something unnatural. “Toga, if you want to see me bloody all you have to do is watch the news, I hear I’m quite popular on there.”

Dabi snorts at that. “Oh please, I saw your fight today. That spider freak didn’t touch you once.”

“Keeping tabs on me, Dabs?” The villain turns to scowl deeply at him and raises an eyebrow as if to say ‘duh’. “Yeah, you’re right, but that’s because I dropped in on him. It’s usually when a villain seeks me out specifically that things turn a little more bloody.” Toga begins to pull him towards the bar with the others, not releasing his hand. Hawks goes willingly.

Dabi smacks Spinner’s hand away as he tries to peer into the takeout box. He does, however, let Toga snatch a piece of his tonkatsu as they pass him. Toga pushes him into a stool and sits next to him, intertwining their fingers. “Well, if you’re so bored, Hero, the League could always pay you a visit when you’re on patrol.”

Even knowing he’s joking; Hawks can’t repress his groan. “Please don’t. The commission would flay me alive no matter how that turned out.”

“Even if you took us all down?” Kurogiri asks, turning his head towards the hero. He sees the rest of the league do the same. Shit, recover, recover.

“Well, obviously that’s not an option for me considering I’m really relying on you all here. But for the record, yes, even then. They’d be mad about one thing or another. If I had to guess it would probably by about any possible lead to your contacts being lost.” Hawks busies himself with taking the folder out of his jacket and placing it on the bar so he looks more nonchalant and not like he’s currently getting analyzed by a bunch of S rank heroes on their own turf.

Toga tightens her hold and he glances down at their joined hands and then up at her face in question. She’s frowning, eyebrows drawn together. Almost, like an angry pout. Did he answer wrong, why would she be mad at him? “Well, they sound like a bunch of jerks.” Compress nods in agreement at her blatant statement.

So, Toga isn’t mad at him. She’s mad… for him? No, it wouldn’t be for him, it just makes sense for them to resent the commission.

“I guess. I certainly don’t like them. I just want to fly free; you know?” He laughs quietly and rubs the back of his neck with his free hand. Toga’s hold gets even tighter.

“Yeah, I do know.” Toga meets his eyes, looking more serious than he’s even seen her. Hawk’s stomach twists uncomfortably.

He needs this conversation to change. It’s making his head hurt, this whole night is. These people are villains. Hawks is a hero. The number 2 hero, and it’s the HPSC that trained him and cared for him to put him there. Their methods hurt and they were strict, but it made him better. Hawks is the youngest hero to have achieved what he has, and he can thank them for that. He has no room to criticize the Commission. The league doesn’t care about him, they care about his access to information. He isn’t like them.

Hawks isn’t like anyone.

He wants to be. He wants to know why Dabi took him here because he was cold. He wanted to know why Toga held his hand and was angry for him. Why she made sure he understood he wasn’t alone. He wanted to understand why Dabi let Toga take his food and didn’t blink an eye, why Compress made sure Dabi ate all of the chicken. Why Kurogiri was so patient with everyone’s issues. He wanted to know why Spinner was allowed to keep his claws out. He wanted, he wanted, he wanted.

Hawks' head hurt.

Hawks lowers his head and presses the back of his hand into his forehead, squeezing his eyes shut. God, his head hurt so bad.

“Hawks, are you okay?” Spinner. Why would Spinner ask? The man doesn’t like him, he’s never talked to him before.

Are you okay?

Is he okay? With a start Hawks realizes he can’t remember the last time someone asked him that. The most similar question he’s had in the past years came from his Handler making sure he can get home without assistance after Corrections.

Why are his eyes burning so badly?

The room is dead silent and Hawks focuses on his breathing. The knives behind his eyes twist harder and he drops his head onto the table in front of him completely. Breathe, breathe, breathe. Hawks knows how to work through pain, and this is the last place he should be having this pathetic episode.

Then why does it feel like the best place?

God, shut UP. This is horrible, has the Commission taught him nothing? A hero cannot show weakness. Not during battle, not at home, not with friends, not with coworkers, and especially not with enemies. A new knife-like pain flairs to life at the base of his skull and spreads all the way down his neck to his shoulder as well. He didn't know the real name for these, so he just thought of them as nerve migraines instead. 

Hawks hand reflexively rips out of Toga’s hold to cross his body and grasps onto where his neck meets his shoulder.

“Ow!” The surprised cry of pain from the girl has Hawks’ eyes snapping open, pinprick pupils focused on the wood in front of him. He doesn’t move an inch. His heart rate starts speeding up rapidly. Hawks does not hurt his handlers. He’s only made that mistake once, when he was a teen. Never again did he even entertain the thought.

“Oh, God,” He whines out, saliva collecting in his mouth like he’s about to throw up. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to. Please, I-“

“Hawks.” Dabi’s deep voice cuts straight through his clouded mind. He has no idea when the villain approached him. “Look at me.” It’s not a question, but a demand. Regardless, Hawks can’t bring himself to move from his curled position. He feels two hands grab each of his gloved ones and bring them in front of him, holding them there. He wants to squeeze them but knows not to. Nothing good ever comes from it, as much as his instincts tell him otherwise.

Hawks suddenly wants to laugh. At least one of the Commission’s lessons stuck with him even now. The hold on him shifts and suddenly there’s a warm hand on the back of his neck. Immediately, the muscles loosen up and he wants to melt onto the bar.

The hand moves up and down slightly. “Focus on me, Birdy.” His voice is quiet, smooth.

Birdy

Hawks does as instructed and lets out a shuttering breath. “Good, that’s perfect. Just like that.” The praise allows his eyes to flutter shut and he wants to flash his wings so badly it makes his eyes burn yet again for a completely different reason. He keeps breathing deeply as his muscles slowly relax. Hawks wants Dabi to compliment him again.

He feels another hand touch his shoulder and began massaging there. It has to be Compress’, given it’s too big to be Toga’s and certainly doesn’t feel like Spinner’s or Kurogiri’s. Hawks finds he doesn’t mind the contact even if it is alien to him. It’s nice, for someone to touch you without an ulterior motive.

After a long moment of silence, Hawks can pinpoint the exact moment he comes back into himself when embarrassment starts to rise up in his gut. “I am…. so sorry,” He mutters quietly into the tabletop, keeping his eyes shut. He feels Compress’ hand retreat after patting him gently.

Dabi’s hand soon follows and retreats from his neck, but his other hand keeps it’s hold on Hawks’ hands.

“Panic attacks are not unexpected here, Hawks, and you certainly don’t have to apologize for one.” Kurogiri’s voice is from his position behind the bad. Panic attacks. Him? That’s hilarious. Hawks’ doesn’t have panic attacks, he’s the number 2 hero. The fastest man alive. No, he just has bad headaches sometimes when he gets confused.

Hawks finally picks his head up. Toga has moved close to Spinner, clutching onto him and staring at him with concern that floods her eyes. Hawks looks away. “I just get migraines sometimes, nothing to be concerned about.” He laughs quietly. No one reacts to the statement. Hawks nudges the file in front of him. “I brought what Boss wanted, it’s about time for me to get out of everyone’s hair.” He stands up, not making a sound as he moves. Dabi still has a hold on his hand and he looks down at the contact in question. The villain snatches his hand back as if he forgot it was there.

“Sorry about this. I probably look ridiculous to you all, passing out on our first meeting and now this. But it was nice to finally interact with you all properly.” Hawks heads for the door as he talks, readjusting his visor. “Hey, just let me know what you need and I’ll do my best to get it to you as fast as I can.” The hero books it out of there as fast as he can without running, without waiting for a goodbye. He doesn’t want to hear it. Hawks is so out of it he almost forgoes the stairs by jumping down the middle. His feathers were left loitering outside the building in the shadows. He doesn’t keep them attached when going places with Dabi. What a ridiculous way to die. The Winged Hero falling to his death.

Hawks is out the door, feathers shooting to his back, and up in the air in a matter of seconds.

“You got the bug on him?”

“Yeah. I almost feel bad, doing it then.”

“It was the best opportunity, Compress.”

Chapter Text

Sometimes Hawks wondered how people confined to the ground managed it. There was nothing like the feeling of flying. No comparison to the freedom of being able to fall and rise on a whim. It was the only way the hero knew how to calm himself. It was never easier to breathe and clear his head than when he was thousands of feet from the world below him.

Up here was the only place Hawks allowed him to lie to himself. He let himself believe that he was free of every speck below him as he would fly into the clouds forever. Free of hero rankings, of villains, of the Commission, of Dabi.

In the end, Hawks always had to come down.

He didn’t allow himself to think about the action of descending, he was always afraid he would stop himself. Even his will had a limit.

Hawks closed his eyes for a moment as his soft boots contacted the pavement.

Welcome back to reality, Hawks.

He drops his feathers to cling to the alley’s walls but keeps a few inside of his jacket. Honestly, the locals here knew him well enough to recognize him without his wings. That same familiarity, however, also prevented a lot of fan reactions and they tended to leave him alone when he was clearly attempting to fly under the radar. Hawks really did love the people of his town, they treated him with more dignity than… almost anyone else he interacted with. The definitely respected him more than his coworkers in the Top 10.

Usagiyama was nice, but the hero was so competitive and straight forward it made Hawks unsure of her. He didn’t like not understanding people, so he kept his distance. Everyone else he had met through his meetings came off as dismissive, bitter, or patronizing. 

Hawks didn’t spend much time around others. He had little free time and a commitment to his life as a hero. He couldn’t waste time messing around.

Hawks needed to keep his head out of the clouds and keep moving forward until his dream was achieved.

Friends do not fit into that life. Dabi, Toga, Spinner, Compress, and Kurogiri didn’t either. The League of Villains did, however. That’s what he needed to keep his gaze on moving forward. Warm, gentle hands didn’t mean anything when they can turn into an inferno in a second.

Hawks stepped into the pharmacy and walked straight to the back, pushing through the door next to the pick-up counter.

The staff sorting files looked up at his entrance and smiled once she recognized him. “Hawks, right on time!” She places the folders on the edge of the shelf before turning to a white paper bag with his Commission ID number taped to it.

He carefully grabs the package from her. When he hesitates, she turns back and looks at him in question. “Saito, I was actually wondering if we could increase the dosage of these.” She frowns in thought.

“Increase? That’s not typically the action taken for these types of medications. What exactly is the reason?”

Hawks holds in a sigh. He knew better than to hope that this would be simple. “I fear it’s been less effective lately. I’ve been taking them as normal but I’ve still been feeling… urges.” This was embarrassing, he didn’t want to speak to someone about his deficiencies About his reliance on drugs typically reserved for children with dangerous quirks.

The woman lets out a huff of breath and twists her lips as she squints at the ground. “Well… it’s very possible that your body just has built up an immunity after all these years. Increasing the dosage would work for a bit, but eventually we’d find ourselves in the same situation and would only risk damage to your organs.”

Hawks clenches his hand tighter, bag crinkling. This wasn’t good. “I see.”

“We can try a new medication, however. But not everybody’s bodies are the same and it might not be as effective or have negative side effects. A switch of medication would also more than likely put your body in limbo for a week or three where the medication isn’t in full swing.” She looks back up at him, concerned. Hawks quickly flashes her a lazy grin.

“Ah geez, this stuff is more complicated than I thought. I’ll go talk to my doctor about it. Thank you, Saito!” He gives her his signature two-fingered salute and turns as she waves at him quietly, still lost in thought. He makes his retreat out of the store, winking and putting his index finger to his lips when a child spots him and their eyes widen in excitement. The child closes her mouth and nods violently, prompting her father to look down at her and follow her gaze. He smiles at Hawks and gives him a polite nod as to not draw attention to them.

Hawks appreciates the sentiment enough to give the girl a treat. He recalls all his feathers to him, allowing them to swirl around to show off their striking red color. Once they’re fully formed he tosses his bag into the area and shoots up to catch it before flying off. He hears the girl squeal in excitement. Several people below take note of the show as well and began waving and shouting his name. Quite a few shout their gratitude at him.

The hero waves with one hand as he places his headphones over his ears, juggling the bag in his grip to be able to do so. The second they’re on he shoots off at his top speed.

Hawks loved flying, and he loved the people of Fukuoka. This is what he needed to protect at whatever cost.

The hero lands gently on his balcony and unlocks the glass door with his thumbprint. He requested the lock after the incident with Dabi. He doubted it would actually stop him if the villain actually wanted in, but it didn’t hurt to try.

He leaves his boots by the door and slides on his house slippers. His feathers take the pills to the kitchen counter as he steps quietly into his bedroom. Hawks methodically strips and hangs up his uniform on the hook by the door. The burner phone is slipped into the pocket of his sweatpants. No matter what, that stays on him. Leaving it somewhere would be asking for trouble. Hawks didn’t trust any lock like he trusted his own abilities.

Back in the kitchen he sends his feathers to fetch his pill organizer while he busies himself with twisting open the cap of his quirk suppressers. Hawks is sorely tempted to just swallow the pills dry, but he knows it’s better to use a liquid. Hawks is always supposed to maintain his body to the best of his ability.

Swallowing three at a time is hardly a feat at this point given how the majority of his life he’s been taking some medication or another.

The dinner labeled for tonight is cauliflower noodle pasta with various vegetables mixed into some kind of sauce. Hawks doesn’t think about it too much. That’s his trick to not minding; not letting himself care.

The second the bowl is empty he cleans up the kitchen, hand washing everything he used and then wiping down the sink and counters. After sweeping, he takes the time to mop the wooden floors and dust the shelves.

Unlike most things in his life, the Commission never asked him to do this. When staying in their building he was expected to keep his room impeccable, sure, but when he had left they offered him a cleaning service. Hawks has accepted, assuming this was just a way for them to keep an eye on him. However, a few weeks in his Handler had called him saying that the workers reported there was nothing for them to clean. His handler had been pleased, praising his responsibility as he transitioned through his hero debut.

Hawks liked when his Handlers praised him.

He retreats back to his bedroom and quickly showers, brushes his teeth, and goes through his overly extensive skin care routine before settling on his cushioned bay window. Phone waiting in lap, Hawks looks out at his city. It made him sad that he couldn’t see the stars here. He had seen pictures on Google before of the night sky filled with twinkling lights. He wanted to see that for himself someday. Fly somewhere quiet and empty. Nothing but the breeze winding through grass and leaves as the stars stretched even as far as he could see.

Someday.

The sudden ringing of his phone cutting through the muted city sounds of his room jolts him out of thought. Hawks answers before the first ring could end. “Pro Hero Hawks, how can I help you?” He’s careful to keep the joviality in his voice despite knowing exactly who was calling and why. That’s expected of him.  

“Hawks, report in for the night.”

“Yes, Sir. It is 2100. Diet plan followed and daily water intake met. Hygiene routine completed. Patrol report turned in at 1730.”

“Report to the Commission tomorrow before patrol.”

“Understood. Goodnight, Sir.” The call ends without answer and Hawks sighs as he looks out the window again. He drops the phone on the seat after double checking his alarms and falls face first onto his bed. Hawks shakes his feathers out before spreading his wings across the Alaskan King, tips hanging off the sides.  

It takes seconds for him to fall asleep.

Chapter Text

The words filtering through the speakers prompt Spinner to frown in confusion. “Urges? The Hell you taking, Hawks?”

Hawks didn’t like getting up before the sun rose, no normal person did. However, he could manage if it meant he got to see the sky shift colors as he flew through the clouds. He buries his nose into the fur of his jacket and shivers at the cold. He really didn’t understand why he couldn’t have a winter uniform like most heroes. Summer or winter, he had the same fur jacket on. Whatever, now was not the time to ask for a costume change. Not with what he was about to report to his Handler.

But it’s okay. It's fine. He's also finally obtained the location of the League of Villain’s base of operations to report in. The information would be enough to subdue their anger.

The glass doors look more menacing than they have the right to as he approaches them. Hawks takes the opportunity to check his reflection in them and does his best not to fluff up his feathers at the sight of his own wings.

God, he really does needed those quirk suppressants to function properly. He was not about to embarrass the entirety of the Commission by getting pissy at his literal own reflection. Despite his quirk, he's not an animal. Even before the introduction of his medication he only got aggressive in his own room, not anywhere else. Hawks had no idea what was going on with himself lately.

He enters the building exactly 20 minutes before 0700 waves at the receptionist. “Good morning, Tanito!” The man takes his ID card from him and inserts it into his computer while Hawks sticks his hand on the scanner.

“Good morning, Hawks. I will never understand how you always have so much energy.” He mutters, although not unkindly.

Hawks raises an eyebrow at the man and leans in like he’s about to reveal a secret. “Don’t tell anyone but it may or may not be a strict beauty sleep schedule and some fancy-ass coffee.” Tanito rolls his eyes at him, laughing gently.

“Alright, Hawks. You’re cleared to head upstairs. Don’t terrorize the president for too long.” Hawks takes his card back and slides it into his wallet.

“Well, that is the plan.” Hawks laughs in return as he turns towards the stairs. It was, technically, the plan. Stepping in the middle of the stairwell, he flaps once hard to launch himself up a few flights before dropping onto the railing of the sixth floor.

He knocks on his Handler’s door exactly 15 minutes before his scheduled time. “Standby” He steps to the side of the door and turns his back to the wall, careful not to lean on it.

Hawks locks his gaze on the junction of the wall and floor, focusing on nothing but his breathing. He had ten minutes to ground himself and stay calm for this meeting. Hawks reported to these meetings once a week for five years. One would think it would be ingrained into him sometime before the 150^th meeting, let alone the point he was at.

For some reason, Hawks never could ease his nerves around the Commission’s agents. He couldn’t understand why, considering they only did what was best for him and his career. The Commission was his family. Hawks knew that.

“Enter.” Hawks was already reaching for the door before the man could even speak. He steps into the office and stands in a relaxed position of parade rest across from his Handler, not sparing the chairs a glance. They were really more for show. The man links his hands together and looks Hawks up and down in silence for a long moment. He sighs and drops his hands from his chin. “You’ve been keeping up your hygiene routine?”

“Yes, Sir.” Hawks keeps his eyes forward.

He leans back in his seat. “If that’s true, we’ll have to find a new shampoo brand. Seems your current one has lost its ability to control that nest on your head you call hair.” Hawks nods once to acknowledge him. If it’s true? When has he ever lied to the Commission? Hawks knows better. “You’ll be sent a new schedule soon. Your... extra work has resulted in a drop of public appearances and people are beginning to notice. We’ve taken the time to work a few PR events into your schedule. This will, of course, lead to a decrease in your allotted sleep time. You are not authorized to increase caffeine intake.”

“Thank you, Sir.”

“After this, we’ll be meeting with the President.” Hawks just barely holds in a jerk of his head at the news. Meeting the president never, ever ended well for him. “Do you have anything outstanding to report?”

“Yes, Sir.” His handler looks up at the response, clearly not expecting it. He raises an eyebrow in prompt. “The quirk suppressants I’ve been taking lately are losing their efficacy. I spoke to the pharmacist and she suggests a new medication. However, she expects there to be a period of ineffectiveness during the transition.”

“How. Long.” The man in front of him is quite clearly grinding his teeth together in attempt to reign himself in. Hawks squeezes his hand behind his back tightly.

Don’t stress grip. Don’t stress grip. Don’t stress grip.

“This...” Spinner doesn’t both to complete the sentence as he picks up his phone.

S: ‘Everyone, get in here. Now.’

S: 'I’m not entirely sure what yet, but something is wrong here.’

“She projected one to three weeks.” The man slams his hands into the desk and stands up. Hawks squeezes his hand tighter to suppress a violent flinch. Suddenly, somehow, the air in the room had become too thin for even his lungs to use.

Don’t move. Stay still. Breathe.

“You are the most incompetent,“ The man spits out the word like it’s blasphemy, “person I have ever had the displeasure of working with. Repeatedly, you cause problems for this Commission and the workers who have been burdened with dealing with you.”

Hawks swallows thickly. “Yes, Sir.”

“Yes, Sir.” He’s mimicked mockingly. “No, I don’t think you quite understand. We have taken countless steps to ensure that your disgusting mutation doesn’t harm the image of the hero we have created. Nevertheless, you find some way to make it a problem yet again. Do you get what I’m saying, Hawks?”

“Yes, Sir.” Hawks tenses every muscle in his body to prevent his shaking.

“Not a single person in Japan wants to see the number 2 hero act like a complete idiot because your demented brain sees a pretty rock. If you had more self-control, this would not be a problem. Yet, here we are, once again shouldering your deficiencies to protect your career. A career we handed to you on a silver platter.” Hawks can’t help it; he drops his chin and tries to reign in the burning of his eyes. “Stop. Pouting. You look pathetic. Christ, Hawks. I worry about you far more than I should have to. Get yourself together, we don’t have time for this bullshit. The president is expecting us. Do not embarrass me anymore than you already have.”

“Yes-“

“Shut the Hell up, I don’t want to hear you.” Hawks chokes around the knot in his throat and quietly follows his Handler out of the office and into the elevator. Hawks stays three paces behind him and to his left, subtly massaging his hand to relieve the cramping muscles.

Breathe. Breathe. Breathe. You disappointed him but you can fix it. You can be better. He’s just upset, he knows what’s best for you.

The rapid pounding of his heart at the sight of the dark wood doors makes him feel sick.

Hawks just wants to fly home.

The man knocks on the door. “Come in.” The president’s voice is level as it always is. “Hawks. Sit down.” His handler remains standing.

That’s… new. New wasn’t good.

Hawks was scared.

He was scared. Of them.

They want what’s best for you.

“I have a question for you.”

They want what’s best for Japan.

“Last night you called confirming your adherence to your diet. Yet, I see you ordered from Ureshi Udon at 16:48. I know for a fact in the time you have been with us you have learned not to lie. You know the corrections for your dishonesty here. Is further training necessary, Hawks? Or do you want to explain this to me?” She tilts her head in question, eyebrows raised as to mimic concern.

Okay, yes, he did very much want to explain that.

“Yes, Ma’am. I have not strayed from my meal plan. The food I had picked up was for Dabi. Earlier that day he suggested me buying him dinner. I had hoped this would earn his favor when I gave him the information requested.” He feels his chest lighten when the woman leans back slightly.

“Dabi. You met with him again?” She asks.

Hawks rubs the inside of his knee with his thumb. “Yes, Ma’am. He requested the handoff at the usual location."

The woman clicks her nails on her desks. “Okay. And did your little gift to a notorious murderer result in anything worthwhile?” Hawks digs his thumb into his leg harder at the condescending tone and resists the urge to duck his head.

“I did not peg him as hostile during the interaction and was taken to their base again.”

She pauses her clicking at that. “Did you get a location this time? Or where you teleported again?”

Hawks shifts in his seat.

Finally, I can make them proud of me.

“Yes, I was teleported again.”  Hawks felt like someone else was speaking. His tongue felt entirely too thick in his mouth.

Wait. What?

What did he just say?

What? What? Did he,

Lie? To her? To his handler? How could he lie to them?

Liar.

Correct yourself. They will kill you if they ever find out you lied about this.

Liar.

The president sighs heavily. “Hawks. You have months and countless resources at your disposal and nothing to show for it. It’s time to step it up.”

She doesn’t know. They don’t know.

Hawks, for perhaps the first time ever in her presence, feels his breaths deepen and become even.

Liar.

She doesn’t know though. They can't tell.

Hawks feels the hysterical need to laugh, but swallows down the urge. He has never felt more grounded in his entire life than this moment, looking her in the eyes. “Ma’am?”

The president pushes her chair away from the large desk slightly and unlocks a drawer, pulling out a folder labeled ‘Remedial’. “Do whatever it takes to earn Dabi’s trust. This limbo cannot exist any longer. Even if it means corrupting yourself. Do you understand what I'm telling you to do?”

Hawks blinks several times, waiting for her meaning to hit him. Denying that he already knows exactly what she means.

“Hawks?” She prompts again, looking at him expectantly, firm.  

“Yes, Ma’am. I understand.” He’s quiet, voice soft. He wants to go home.

She nods once. “Your handler will determine if you need further training in this area. Dismissed.” His handler approaches to take the folder held out to him.

Well, if today is already going to be some sort of fever dream-

“Ma’am?” Both of them pause at his question, clearly not expecting him to speak up.

The president turns back to look at him, his Handler frowning at him over his shoulder. There’s a long moment of silence. “What.” She finally answers, voice short. More of a demand than a question.

“I don’t mean to pry where it’s not my place. But, my file… it’s only in paper, right?” His handler turns completely to look at him, frown unwavering.

The woman puts one hand over the other on top of her desk. “You were correct about prying. I assume you have a reason to ask.” She looks at him expectantly.

“Yes, Ma’am. Dabi has… insinuated he knows things about me.” Hi entire hand is squeezing his knee now, fingertips digging in.

She drops her head for a second before looking back up, clearly playing up her frustration. Her eyes are dark with curiosity. Hawks knows how to read people. They taught him that. “I don’t have time for vagueness, Hawks. What did he say?”

Now or never, he supposed. “Dabi said… I think it was my name, Ma’am.” Hawks almost wants to jump, wings twitching involuntarily at the energy drop of the room. Despite the president remaining in her seat, they both seem to loom over him like some incomprehensible threat.  

Hawks absently wonders if this is what it’s like to exist chained to the ground.

“Hawks,” Her voice is smooth, yet his name has never sounded more like a sentencing, “The world knows your name, the only name you have. What did he say.”

“K-Keigo.” His tongue stumbles over the syllables. The simple word feels like the most damning thing that’s ever left his mouth. So why does it make his lungs feel like they’re full of clean air? The air he can only find when he’s thousands of feet into the clouds?

The woman raises her hands to her mouth before dropping them back to the desk, still linked together. “Your response to this situation shows exactly why we’re forced to take the actions we do with you, Hawks. Your name is Hawks, it has always been Hawks, it will always be Hawks. This villain was attempting to catch you off guard, and he has clearly done so. Not only that, but now you have led him to believe you have some sort of secret name you don’t even know. The Commission has gifted you with training no one else in the world has had the privilege of receiving. With your debut, I was optimistic. I was proud of you, Hawks. Now? Everyday I find myself doubting you more. Did we make a mistake?”

Hawks’ heart drops straight to his stomach while dread claws its way through his veins, making his arms shake. His breathing picks up once again. The room seems to tilt. “No, no. I’m sorry. I can do better. I will do better. I swear. I promise! I’ll make you proud. I can.”

His handler speaks up for the first time since entering the office. “Yes, Hawks. With our guidance, you can. Ms. President, I believe Hawks’ earlier incompetence has given us an opportunity.”

She calmly flicks her piercing eyes from Hawks to the taller man. “Go on.”

“Hawks will need to be out of the public eye for a few weeks. If we find a story to pull him completely with, it’s a perfect opportunity for reeducation.” The president looks pleased with the suggestion.

“Yes. In the meantime, reaffirm his honeypot training.” She turns back to Hawks, who’s doing his very best to control the saliva rapidly pooling into his mouth, to quell the sickness clawing its way out of his stomach. “Don’t worry, Hawks. The Commission will take care of you. We always do.” Hawks meets her gaze desperately, latching onto her unspoken promise of a chance to atone. “Be good for me, Hawks.”

“Yes, Ma’am. Thank you, Ma’am.” His voice is so choked there’s no doubt they know he’s fighting back his sobs.

The world seems muted as he follows his Handler out of the office. His hands are clenched so tightly in his pockets he’s almost afraid of tearing it, despite knowing how tough the material was designed to be. The second he’s dismissed he’s throwing himself through the nearest window out of the workers’ sights and shooting straight into the sky.

Get to the clouds

He can’t stomach the sight of the Commission’s building.

Actually, he can’t stomach anything.

Hawks tucks his wings and dives into the small forest right outside the city’s housing region. He prays no one is nearby as he creates an ungodly amount of noise crashing through the branches before dropping onto the ground and immediately falling to his hands and knees.

He can be better

A dry sob racks through his entire body, making him shiver and gag heavily.

God, what’s happening? He’s never felt like this before

Hawks lets out a low whine that’s cut off as he spits saliva onto the ground. The action prompts his body to continue retching. His eyes burn. He wants to cry. Hawks can’t cry. He gasps horribly, prompting a stab of pain through his throat. He gags again, falling into his forearms as the shaking gets out of control and he can’t support himself.

His patrol starts in seven minutes. He can’t be late. Hawks isn’t late. He spits more bile onto the grass below him.

The rustling of a bush yanks his head up, eyes narrowing in on the source of the sound. A squirrel runs up a nearby tree, winding around the trunk as his tail bobs with the movement.

Hawks is in the air before he entirely knows what has happened. He swallows heavily throughout the flight, fighting the breaths racking his entire body.

Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.

“Look, look! I told you all Hawks would be through here today!” He looks down to see a teen aggressively pointing at him amongst a small group of people.

“Ayo!” He waves at them, smiling brightly and sending feathers to twirl around them in a cyclone. They screech in excitement and reach at the feathers he keeps dancing out of their reach. “I hope you all are behaving yourselves; I just started my patrol!”

“Always, Hawks! Thank you for protecting my mama!” One of the boys cries out at him.

Hawks forces out a laugh that tears at his throat while calling his feathers back. “Aw, don’t thank me for that. That’s just exactly what I’m here for! Stay safe!” He throws out a peace sign and shoots forward at his top speed. The wind drowns out anything they might yell in return.

 “Dude, you need to calm down for one second. Think.”

 “Dabi, please, take a breath before you bring this whole city down. There’s nothing you can do if you burn yourself alive right now.”

Chapter Text

Dabi had laughed.

When he stood in that pristine, fancy, too-big apartment with a pristine, cocky, know-it-all hero who Dabi had startled so badly it seemed like he couldn’t even blink.

He had thought it was funny.

Dabi felt his fire boil his blood as smoke escaped from in-between his staples.

“Dude, you need to calm down for one second. Think.”

               “Touya, Touya, Touya.” The younger boy babbles into his chest, hands twisting into his shirt. He can feel tears soaking the fabric.

               “I’m here, Keigo. I’m right here.” Touya winds his arms around him tightly. “You… you don’t have to be a hero, Keigo.” His shirt gets even more twisted as his hands clench harder. The boy looks up at him, meeting his gaze, and Touya could not possibly look away.

               Even now, even like this, Keigo’s eyes were like nothing he’s ever seen. The sun itself seemed to swallow his pupils. “No!” The boy screams at him, more tears falling free. “I’m going to be a hero! I will be the hero everyone runs to, no matter what! I am going to be a hero the entire world can trust!”

               Touya believed him.

Dabi had left him there. Alone.

Then Laughed. At. Him.

“Dabi, please, take a breath before you bring this whole city down. There’s nothing you can do if you burn yourself alive right now!” Dabi snaps his head up to glare at Compress. Everything in the room was covered in a blue hue, Spinner was gagging through the smoke as Kurogiri ushered him towards the door. Shigaraki had taken Toga and Twice out. “Please, Dabi, bring yourself back to the moment. What are you doing right now?”

What is he doing? Isn’t it clear? He’s going to smother this world with blue. He’s going to bring the sun back to Keigo. His Keigo.

The world can’t have him, they destroyed him. Tore him apart and then presented a pretty little songbird from his ruin.

“Dabi you are only going to hurt Hawks like this! Control yourself or you’ll only bring him down with the rest of us.” Dabi meets Kurogiri’s yellow gaze, wavering for the first time.

Pull me out. Pull me out of this anger.

Kurogiri strides towards him, reaching for him. The man was not as corporeal as he looked; regardless, he grabs onto Dabi’s shoulder and meets his gaze. Dabi’s eyebrows quiver, once. “I don’t know how you’re connected to this man, but I see there’s more to this situation than we can imagine. You knew his name, even when he couldn’t recognize it. We can help Hawks; but it seems to me that you're the one that can save Keigo, Dabi.”

Dabi jerks away from his touch, raising his hands to his face. The space between his scars is smoldering, but his hands are cool enough to touch himself with. He touches his middle fingers to the corners of his eyes, checking them. Of course, they come away dry. Dabi can’t cry anymore.

He swore he was.

Dabi slowly drops his hands to his sides, ducking his head. Kurogiri gives him time to breathe until smoke stops pouring out with every exhale. The room was empty, except for the two of them.

A long silence fills the space.

“I knew him. Before I was Dabi, before he was Hawks. I just thought he didn’t recognize me, how could he?” Dabi smiles without humor, gesturing to his scars. “But that’s not it. You can’t possibly understand but I… could have prevented Hawks entirely.”

“Could you have?”

               “I am going to be a hero the entire world can trust!”

“It’s never wise to spend so much time on could-haves and maybes. This is the situation we’re in and this is the one we have to work with.” Kurogiri was too fucking sensible for the League of Mentally Ill Rejects.

Dabi looks up at the man before turning his head to glare at the wall.

“Whatever. Repeat what I said to anyone and I’ll turn your dumb bar too cinders.”

“Of course, Dabi.” The man is entirely too calm at his threat and dutifully moves out of the way as Dabi stalks past him and out of the smoke-damaged room.

The rest of the league is spread out in the main area as they pass through the doorway.

“Dabi! You’re okay! You almost burnt down the entire building, dumbass!” Twice jumps up from where Toga is coloring in his suit. She didn’t get very far; they weren’t gone long.

Dabi rolls his eyes and walks towards the bar, slumping onto a stool. “Whatever, it happens. Could I just get something stronger than straight-up acid, Kurogiri?”

Kurogiri heads behind said bar. “No, you need to participate in this talk. You can have some apple juice though.” Shigaraki snorts from across the room and Dabi whips around to glare at him. The blue-haired man puts his hands up in a placating gesture.

Dabi accepts the apple juice and takes a sip before slamming his head down onto the wood. “So, he certainly is a spy.” Compress starts with. Dabi clenches his hand to subdue the immediate burning that rises to his skin. The tone was not accusatory, he was just pointing it out for the sake of the choices they were going to have to make tonight.

Dabi pushes his glass around without looking at it. “He was ordered to spy, but he did lie to those psychopaths.” Dabi never thought he’d find himself accusing someone else of being a psychopath, and yet here he was. “I walked him here. I saw him looking around. He flew home. Hawks knows exactly where we are.”

“You walked him here, huh?” Toga asks, smiling innocently at him. Dabi picks up his glass with the full intention of launching it at her face. Kurogiri, however, plucks it right out of his hand and places it back on the counter to pour more juice in it. Dabi glowers at him but keeps it at the bar. “Okay, okay, Dabi’s in a mood. Got it.”

“Dabi’s always in a mood, Himiko. Of course he’s in a mood! He just found out his bird boyfriend is fucked up!”. Spinner nods along as if Twice said something deep.

Dabi didn’t want to be here. He didn’t want to be dealing with these idiots. What he needed to be doing was recording the commission workers’ screams on his phone as they burned alive.

Compress clears his throat to recollect the focus of the room. “As much as I love that we’re picking on Dabi, we need to talk about what we’re going to do with Hawks.”

Okay, ignoring the first part of that sentence, “What’s there to discuss? We’re getting him out.” Dabi narrows his eyes at the magician, waiting for him to suggest any other course of action.

“Of course, but this isn’t as simple as we’re going to want it to be. If we were to straight up approach Hawks about this he would absolutely shut us down and quite possibly put him in danger with the Commission.”

Dabi chews the inside of his cheek perhaps to aggressively. “So, what? You want us to wait until after they reeducate him? After he- he corrupts himself with me just because they made him promise to be good?” Twice starts making frantic hand signals towards him as smoke once again rises from his skin. Spinner looks away uncomfortably and Toga crosses her arms tightly. Shigaraki stares at him silently.

“Dabi, please, control yourself. None of us understand your connection to Hawks, but our purpose has always been to correct this corrupt society. Hawks is a victim of hero society, just as we are. He’s one of us even if he doesn’t know it. Do try to have faith in us.” Dabi crosses his arms on top of the bar and once again drops his head onto it.

He just can’t control himself today. Not regarding Hawks.

“I never liked Hawks.” Dabi stiffens as Shigaraki speaks up for the first time, but makes the considerable effort to reign himself in. “I never wanted to interact with him here, even if you all did eventually come to trust him at some point. I hate heroes who do the bare minimum to save someone in a flashy way on camera and then turn and wink to their fans. It makes me itch like nothing else. I hated that Hawks flirted with reporters, laughed at villains, smiled and waved before flying to his next modeling gig. I hated that despite that, he had the lowest casualty rate and injury rate of any hero in the world, not just Japan. I now hate that the Hero Public Safety Commission has fooled me just like everyone else.”

Shigaraki scratches frantically at his neck. “But this gives us an opportunity. This world is filled with fake heroes. Hawks is a fake hero persona over a real hero, I think. If that is the case, then this scenario is the perfect key to the final boss’s room. Show this rotten society what their idols really are, who creates them, and how. And then in the same quest show them exactly what their heroes could be. What they should be.”

The tension of the room is split as Toga jumps onto the couch cushion; one hand pumped into the air as a fist as the other drags Twice up with her. “So, it’s decided. Operation: Expose the Bird and Snatch Him is officially underway!”

Dabi shakes his head at the incredibly misleading mission name but can’t stop the huff of laughter that comes out.

               “Don’t you think you’re a little small to be the number 1 hero? I mean, look at All Might.”

               “Touyaaa! How could you say that to me? I’m going to grow!” Keigo shoves him and Touya lets gravity roll him over, hiding his smile in the sheets. “It doesn’t matter anyway. I’m not going to be All might. I’m going to be a hero so good that people will compare those losers to me!”

               “That’s good, I really don’t want to see your hair spiked like that.”

               “I could pull it off.” Keigo kicks him in response to the noncommittal sound he mumbles into the bed spread.

               The silence that encompasses them is entirely too calming to be normal. Touya allows himself to drift off, eyelids growing heavier with each blink.

               “Touya…. do you really think I won’t be that buff?”

              “Are you sleeping? Touya!”

Chapter Text

Hawks had to read the text message on his phone several times over before he started to believe his eyes. Definitely not what he was expecting to see when he woke up that morning, doubly so after the disasters his grand total of two League of Villains meetings were.

D: ‘Congrats, Birdy. Now it’s time to lend your skills to the cause. 355-1234, Tsukushikoi, Hokkaido @ 7’

Hawks copies the address into google but it’s just a nondescript field just outside a city’s bounds. Likely a rally point.

 H: ‘Aw Hot stuff I knew you were getting soft on me. Can I at least get a clue or what to wear? Don’t want to be overdressed ;)’

 H: ‘Also why did you send this at 4 AM, do you sleep like at all ever?’

 D: ‘No’

 D: ‘Just don’t wear your stupid ass hero outfit.’

 H: ‘Um, my outfit has singlehandedly brought back cargo pants. Halter tops are next.'

 D: ‘uh yeah I know. It’s the real reason I hate heroes. Your ugly ass outfits.'

 D: ‘Wait, you wear a halter top?

 H: ‘Wouldn’t you like to know, Firecracker  ;;;;;;;)’

 D: ‘Nvm, you’re out of the league’

 H: ‘Okay, well.'

 H: 'Before I go can you answer a short survey to improve my future villain interviews? Was it 1.)The nickname  2.)The non-answer  3.)The future fashion trend’

 D: ‘I’m also bumping you to the top of our priority kill list.’

 H: ‘Ah shit’

Hawks laughs quietly to himself as he puts the burner phone back into his pocket. He would have to rush to get to patrol on time, but the conversation was worth it. Meeting with the president had left him off kilter and Hawks found talking to the villain grounding, for some unknown reason.

It was what they wanted anyway, right? He was supposed to make Dabi like him. But he’d been accepted into the league now, without having to utilize that training. If he could keep this up, if he could provide the Commission good information, they’d have no reason to distrust him. He could lie.

No, no, no, hell no, if you lie to them you will die. They will kill you. They'll do it all again.

Except… Hawks had already lied to them. To the president. She didn’t know, his handler didn’t know. He could do it again, they taught him to be a liar. If they put so much effort into his training, why shouldn’t he use it? If the results were the same, where was the harm? The ends justify the means, they taught Hawks that too.

Hawks didn’t have to tell them. The Commission doesn’t have to know.

“You should dress like this more often.” Hawks doesn’t startle at Dabi’s obvious attempt to catch him off guard once again. Hawks was perfectly aware of his surroundings at all times outside his house, thank you very much.

He turns to face Dabi with an exaggerated shrug, smirking. “Well then I would be stealing your style. Your sad, emo, colorless style.” Dabi narrows his eyes at him and Hawks purses his lips, feigning innocence.

“What’s with the feathers?” Dabi nods towards him and Hawks shakes them out in response.

“Oh, yeah, it’s actually this pigment the Commission developed for situations where I need to be more discreet. I’ve done this a few times, honestly.” Hawks wings were a dark brown color, a much more natural and subdued look than his usual red. The hero had also abandoned his normal costume for an all-black look consisting of a rather tight t-shirt, cargo pants, and an American brand of assault boots he discovered when meeting some heroes in the country. He had always strongly preferred these boots to the flimsy ones he used normally. The Commission, however, had turned his request down immediately stating that they make him look too militaristic and serious.

The Commission created his look to reflect his personality. Laid back, nonchalant, and open.

Hawks doesn’t break eye contact with Dabi as he lurches himself into the air with one flap to avoid Toga’s attempted back stab. The girl giggles brightly at him, a deep flush proving her excitement. “Aw, Hawksy! I didn’t recognize you, my bad” She grins at him widely, clearly lying.

“Oh, of course, of course.” Hawks drops done next to Dabi gently. “I get it, you just want to protect Dabi. Stranger danger and all that.” Hawks puts his hand up to his mouth, blocking Dabi’s view. “Don’t let him know I said this, but he really does need the help, doesn’t he? Poor little guy.”

Hawks can hardly hear her laugh as he ducks the blast of blue flame aimed towards his face.

“It’s getting dark, time to head out. Hawks, you’ve reached your daily limit of annoying me. Toga… you get one more. Let’s go.” They both exchange looks as they fall in behind Dabi.

“What happens if I break the limit?” He asks, keeping his eyes locked on Toga’s as they grin slyly at each other.

“Witch trial-esque death.” Dabi’s tone holds no inflection and Hawks whistles lowly at him.

“Well, if I had to pick a way to go. Dying by your-“ Hawks cuts off, faltering at the site of their target. He did not recognize the area or address, no. But Hawks knows exactly what this is. The information was deemed important enough to know in the case of a breach.

The HPSC President’s house.

Hawks swallows, looking at the looming structure. Why did two stories look so tall? He literally lives in a skyscraper. “Ah, are you sure you didn’t mean death by my cover being blown? What the hell are we doing here?” The house was surrounded by an innocuous looking fence and there were no other houses in site, no cars either. No doubt they were here to steal some information, not a person.

That would have created a rather awkward situation. Hawks looks at Toga in alarm as she does a small shot of blood and starts transforming.

Hawks has to consciously untense his muscles as a chill racks through his entire body at the site of her. Dabi watches his reaction out the corner of his eye. The villain takes a deep breath before exhaling, smoke escaping from his nostrils.

“Your cover being blown or not is entirely up to you. Toga’s our key, it’s your job to handle security measures.” Dabi gestures for him to stay put as Toga waltzes up to the entrance like it’s a McDonalds. Hawks watches her go.

“You’re putting an awful lot of faith in my abilities. I doubt they fuck around with that.” Dabi snorts at him and Hawks turns to look at him.

Dabi shakes his head, amused. “Sorry, sorry, but I have a little more than faith. I looked around your house when you were passed out on the floor. You have almost no normal clothes, yet a rather large selection of covert options. I thought it was interesting. Not to mention you’re the youngest hero ever to reach top 10, let alone be the #2. I don’t take that lightly, Little Bird.” Hawks stares at him, eyes wide. Dabi breaks eye contact to glance past him and his eyebrows raise in amusement.

Hawks looks behind himself too, only to see his wings spread wide.

Traitorous bastards

“You do that when you’re happy, huh?” Dabi grins at him with an insufferably smug look.

“No!” Hawks forcibly keeps his voice low, despite nearly shouting the word, “Really! It’s not a happy thing. It’s more of an attention thing, a pride thing.”

Dabi purses his lips and nods slowly like he’s thinking. “Okay… that’s more embarrassing I don’t know why you explained that.” Hawks can feel his face heat up. He turns back towards the house and begins to approach the fence without another word.

He feels Dabi’s presence behind him as Toga enters the house using the door’s scanners. Hawks scans the property and sends out feathers to map the place down. He raises his fist to his mouth, eyes open but unseeing as he takes in the feedback from every individual feather.

There’s a ridiculous number of cameras on the outside of the building, several motion sensors both inside and outside, likely underground and in the trees if he had to guess. They won’t register the feathers as anything noteworthy as long as he keeps the speed down. Toga’s entrance would have knocked out most of the indoor security, no doubt, but the cameras would always be running.

In theory, all of this should have been a non-issue considering the President literally assigned him to an infiltration mission. She, and everyone involved, should have considered this possibility, and given him a contingency.

Yet here he was. There’s no doubt in his mind that she would not have given the go on this, but he had no choice. This was his true in to the League of Villains and Hawks was not going to throw away everything he’s been working for to protect whatever she wanted to hide. If the information was truly dangerous, he’d cross that bridge when he came to it.

For now, this was happening.

Dabi grunts out a curse as a feather picks him up without warning and brings him over the fence. Hawks meets him by the window and has another feather from the inside open it as he brings them both through and gently touches down. Toga appears shortly, following a feather gently tugging her along.

“Where are we going?” He asks, keeping his eyes trained forward. The house is dark, but he already has the layout of the place memorized from his feathers.

“The office, I guess.” Hawks suppresses a grimace at the fact that they came in here without a real plan put together. If he wasn’t here, Toga would have been the only person to not send the security system into full alert.

Regardless, he is here, and he knows where the office is. “Stay in my footsteps. Toga, take point and just go where the feather pulls you. How long can you keep that up?”

“A few hours, I’ve been training it!” She looks so proud of herself Hawks can’t stop himself from returning her grin.

Dabi huffs impatiently, “That’s awesome and all but we shouldn’t be here that long. Let’s go.” Hawks nods and starts nudging his feather forward, keeping him and Dabi out of sight of the cameras. If they ever had reason to look back at the security footage, the worse thing they would find would be someone imitating the President. It would clearly link the League of Villains, and Hawks would no doubt have to deal with the repercussions of that. Regardless, she had already used the President’s face to get in the house and disarm systems. There was no point now in keeping her out of sight.

Hawks picks the lock on the door with trained ease and immediately sends a feather to open the window as well. If they needed a quick getaway, they’d likely still be in here. “What do you need?”

Dabi steps past them and starts tugging on locked desk drawers. “The HPSC files on the top 5.” The villain’s voice is calm, with no inflection. Yet Hawks still feels needles roll over every inch of his body like a wave.

The files of the top 5. That includes him.

This situation just got inconceivably worse.

Hawks had a few options here. Call the mission and take them out now, bring them in. The best course of action. Take them out and claim to the league they were found out. Not smart. Trip an alarm and hope they had to bail before Dabi got his hands on Hawks’ file. Too obvious. Roll with the situation and pray to whatever God that was listening that they didn’t actually read the files before Hawks could play cover-up. Worst option, too many unknown variables, too much reliance on luck.

Hawks looks over at Toga. She was moving books around on the President’s bookshelf as if a secret passage was going to appear.

Dabi was the bigger threat with his fire. He could handle Toga with a few feathers, as long as she didn’t have enough blood stored to replicate someone’s quirk. His eyes flick back to Dabi as the arsonist gestures him over to a safe pushed into the back corner. “Open this.”

Hawks frowns at him, talks in a hushed voice. “Picking locks is one thing, you expect me to be able to open that?” Dabi raises an eyebrow at him as if to say duh.

Well, sucks to suck. Hawks did very much know how to break into a safe like that. However, this was also the perfect opportunity to take the loss and get the hell out of here without any files, let alone Hawks’ incriminating one.

But to his dismay, Toga comes skipping over. “I got this! Met this nice guy the other day.” Hawks’ eye twitches as the girl’s form drops back into her natural one and she starts taking long drinks from her pack. The man that replaces her is skinny, a little taller than Hawks, and absolutely has some kind of breaking and entering quirk as she places her hand on the handle and it takes a light golden glow.

Hawks has to actually bite the inside of his cheek to prevent a ridiculously loud sigh as the safe door swings open.

If he knocked them out now, neither would be able to react in time to use their quirks against him at all.

Hawks clenches and unclenches his fist as Dabi starts rooting through the papers that fill the safe from top to bottom in neatly sectioned shelves. He sees his grin, even in the darkness of the room, as he pulls out Endeavor’s file. Hawks spots his ID number on the folder immediately behind it.

He needs to knock them out now.

Hawks’ eyes follow Dabi as he pulls out a handheld document scanner and starts going through every paper. Endeavor’s file isn’t terribly long, but definitely has more depth to it then the others still in their proper spot. None of them even remotely resemble the size of Hawks’ folder.

Dabi closes Endeavor’s folder and hands it to Toga. She replaces it and pulls out Hawks’ file.

Hawks hand twitches. The feathers he has spread around the property are straining to return to him, pulling on his mind.

Dabi takes the folder from her.

Now. There is no other option.

Dabi turns to him and hands him the folder without looking at him. Toga hands him Best Jeanist’s folder and the dark-haired man begins scanning the pages.

Hawks slowly tears his eyes away from the villain to look down at his hands. His ID number seems to stare back at him. Can an 8-digit code be mocking? Hawks can barely feel the weight of the papers in his hand, as if he isn’t holding something more valuable and dangerous than any weapon he’s had a glimpse of before.

He can’t move.

“You just gonna stand there?” Hawks doesn’t look up at Dabi as he speaks; instead, he watches his own hands grip the file tighter, denting the thick material. The action doesn’t feel like his own.

No, he’s not curious. He’s not because it doesn’t matter. Hawks knows everything that’s in there, why wouldn’t he? It’s his folder. The only reason he’s nervous is because his mission could be exposed. Hawks isn’t afraid of the folder. The only reason he doesn’t have access to it is because certain training techniques have shown to be less effective when you know what outcome is expected and the thought process behind it.

So why can’t he move?

Dabi continues scanning through the papers. “Aren’t you curious, Keigo?”

Hawks opens the file.

    Program: Heroes of Our Future

    Subject: Takami, Keigo

    DOB: 20071228

    Blood Type: 0 POS

    Quirk: Fierce Wings – Mutation, Emitter

    Attributes:   

    -Heightened speed

    -Heightened hearing

    -Increased strength

    -Low body weight

    -Accelerated processing power (DNT)

    -Accelerated response time

    -Feather sensitivity (IT)

    -Feather telekinesis (IT - HP)

    -Animal characteristics. Type: Redtailed Hawks (DNT – T)

    Codename: Hawks

    Designator: 0000A148

    Relations:

    Father (biological): Takami, Kurai (Status: Apprehended)

    Mother (biological): Takami, Tomie (Status: Relocated)

Your response to this situation shows exactly why we’re forced to take the actions we do with you, Hawks. Your name is Hawks, it has always been Hawks, it will always be Hawks. This villain was attempting to catch you off guard, and he has clearly done so.

Hawks’ eyes burn but he can’t look away for a second. The words start moving and it takes him entirely too long to realize his hands are shaking.

Why? Why did she lie? Why couldn’t he know? Why did she lie to him?

Why did she act like he was an idiot?

Hawks has no measure of how long he stared at the thick black ink, not bothering to move past the first page. The flash of silver staples brings him out of wherever his head went. Dabi puts his hands around the folder and gently tugs it out of his grip.

Hawks lets him.

Dabi begins copying his file as well. Toga has reverted back to her natural form and is silently watching his face. The other folders have all been returned. The other papers in the safe have been disturbed, but Hawks has no idea what they were.

The villain hands Toga his file to return it, while he walks to the printer and begins uploading the information. When it prints Hawks watches him delete his information from the scanner before handing the newly printed papers back to Hawks.

Dabi meets his eyes, unspeaking, calm.

“Why?” The question comes out of his mouth before he can process it, hardly audible.

Dabi quirks his head at the hero. “Why what, Birdy?” The nickname soothes something in him and his shoulder untense slowly.

“I don’t- I don’t understand. Why wouldn’t you want my information? How did you know my name?” Dabi shrugs, bored as if the foundations of Hawks’ life weren’t trembling around him.

“The league has a don’t ask don’t tell policy. I don’t know shit about Shigaraki and you don’t know shit about me. The time for your vetting is over, Hawks.” Dabi says it like it’s the simplest thing in the world, yet it was more respect of Hawks’ privacy than he’s ever been afforded.

If he’s being honest with himself, that fact is starting to piss him off. Hawks doesn’t miss how Dabi avoids the second question.

Hawks feels the vibration of the pavement before anything else and has all feathers, aside from high priority placed ones, recalled in seconds. They zip around the room in a hurricane. Returning and adjusting papers, books, chairs, nick-knacks. He slaps the papers he’s holding into Dabi’s chest and the man holds them there out of reflex before Hawks grabs onto both Dabi and Toga’s arms and throws himself out the window, taking off into the air.

The visitor is at the door. Hawks pulls all remaining feathers to his wings, shutting the window as the last one exits the house. He has them out of sight and in the clouds in seconds.

Toga lets out a shriek of laughter as she passes her free hand through the water vapor. “It’s pretty up here, Hawksy! You’re strong too, for how tiny you are!” He snaps his head towards her in indignation.

“What the Hell! I am not tiny!”

He can hear Dabi’s snort even over the rush of wind. “Yeah okay, Tweety Bird. Imagine if you actually ate protein.” Hawks drops some altitude in a jerky motion.

“Oh- oh god.” He drops some more. “My dainty little arms can’t take the weight.” He lets go of both their arms and catches them with feathers instead after letting them fall for a few seconds. Toga is yelling in excitement once again, spreading her now free arms to imitate flying.

Dabi uses some rather interesting words to curse him out. Hawks can’t stop himself from laughing and Dabi pauses his tirade to watch him.

His blue eyes are incredibly intense as he watches Hawks gently touch down to the grass with a strong flap of his wings, a smile still on his face. Hawks tilts his head at the villain in question after a moment of silence and the man seems to shake out of whatever stupor he was in and approaches Hawks to return the papers to him. Hawks takes them slowly, folding them and shoving them into a large pocket on his pants.

Toga makes them both jerk in surprise as she lunges into a bush and remerges with leaves in her hair and a rabbit held tightly in her hands. Hawks can only blink at her as she bites into the poor animal, ripping skin and meat with her incisors.

Dabi only sighs as she offers them the animal with both hands, an innocent look on her face. “Toga, you know my body isn’t made for that diet.” She turns to look at Hawks expectantly, retracting her arms slightly only to push the animal back out. Urging him to join in.

Hawks eyes have fixated on it, seeing the muscle fibers, pelt, and blood in incredible detail. He shakes his head slowly and the girl shrugs before sinking her teeth back in. Blood runs down her arms in thick, dark droplets. Hawks’ jaw is clenched so tight it’s giving him both a toothache and a neckache.

Christ, what is he, a fucking vampire?

Get ahold of yourself

He jerks his head away to look at Dabi who has begun texting on his phone. A portal swirls open in front of them and Dabi slaps the rabbit’s remains out of Toga’s hands, preventing her from carrying it through. She glares at him and reaches for a knife on her thigh. Dabi raises his hand in retaliation, the raised fingers a clear indication of what he’s threatening.

She rolls her eyes at him and steps through, Dabi following a second later. Hawks glances at the small animal’s corpse and squeezes the papers in his pocket before passing through the warp as well.

Chapter Text

Hawks was lost in his head, but not enough so that he missed how not a single member of the league even feigned confusion as to why he had his own file. Dabi tosses the handheld scanner to Spinner and the villain scampers out of the room with it.

“So, I take it the quest was successful?” Dabi doesn’t respond to Shigaraki beyond a duh look.

Wait.

Shigaraki?

Oh, what the fuck. Hello, Hawks. The entire purpose of your mission is sitting right in front of you. Hawks swallows and keeps his eyes on the blue-haired villain as Toga exits the common room. Shigaraki meets his gaze and then scowls at his stare. “Don’t look at me like that, your eyes are freaky.” Hawks startles at that.

Yes, he’s been told that before by the Commission, but it didn’t really come up anymore. He tried not to keep eye contact with people when he wasn’t wearing his visor.

To Hawks’ surprise, it’s Dabi that speaks up. “Who the hell are you calling freaky, Xerosis?”

Shigaraki sputters at him, “I didn’t call him freaky! I said his eyes were! God!” Dabi rolls his eyes at him before glancing at Hawks out of the corner of his eye. Hawks scrambles to get himself together.

“Oh, no hard feelings, I’m well aware my eyes can be off-putting. Sorry to stare but I wasn’t really expecting this. Nice to finally meet you, Shigaraki Tomura.” Hawks dips his head at the man with a grin. Respectful, but not serious.

Shigaraki grunts at him before turning back to some handheld game device. 

“Where’s Compress?” Dabi speaks up.

Kurogiri gestures towards a closed door Hawks hadn’t seen anyone go through before. Dabi makes a face and Kurogiri clarifies, “He said he wanted to try making a recipe he saw rather than acquire some takeout this time. Also,” the man angles his body towards Hawks, “he made clear he wanted to extend an invitation for you to stay.”

Hawks frowns at him in confusion. “Stay for… dinner?” Kurogiri hums and affirmation and Hawks slowly nods. Dinner, with the League of Villains. His life was so goddamn weird.

In all honesty, he’d rather head home to stare out the window for a few hours until he had to report for bed check. Unfortunately, this was the perfect opportunity for him to gather intel about Shigaraki and their mission and get closer to Dabi as ordered. Hawks silently approaches the bar, picking a seat next to Dabi as Toga comes back into the room with Spinner.

Spinner drops a stack of papers onto the bar next to Shigaraki, who immediately pushes it towards Dabi without looking away from his game.

Hawks glances at the screen to see strange colored… animals? Facing off. Unsurprisingly, he doesn’t recognize it. The door opens and Spinner catches two marbles that he sets onto the wood. They pop into a stack of plates and silverware. Toga snatches up a plate and holds it out in front of her vertically, inspecting it.

“Cool! When did we get real plates?” She exclaims.

“Today, Compress deemed it important enough to pick up.” Kurogiri answers while pushing a glass of water in front of Shigaraki.

Okay, what right did Dabi have to criticize his house then? Because that was way worse than only having one mug, in his opinion. What’s wrong with having one mug?

More importantly, why is he still stuck on that?

Compress exits the kitchen holding a rather large pan. The smell from it makes Hawks squeeze his hands into fists.

Oh, come on. He literally, literally, just got over the rabbit and now the universe is pulling this shit on him? This is exactly why he doesn’t eat around other people.

Regardless, he takes the plate handed to him with a nod and a grin. The portion is way to big, and the plate is filled with pasta with vegetables and chicken in a pinkish sauce. “Why is it pink?” He asks, curiously, as he nudges it around with a fork.

Compress answers him cheerfully, “It’s vodka sauce! It’s a mix, so it creates quite the color! It’s an Italian recipe I found the other day, tell me what you think!” Vodka? How odd. Well, in all honesty it’s not too terribly different from his usual meals. As long as he avoids the chicken, his Handler would probably let it go with minimal correction.

After sneaking a glance to make sure everyone is eating, just to be sure this isn’t some sick trick, he finally takes a bite. It’s good, really good, and he feels his feathers flutter lightly but lets it happen. Hawks can’t be bothered to spend any energy on the small aspects of his quirks when Spinner is on his right, literally putting crickets onto his plate.

“So, am I allowed to know what the situation with the files is?”

Shigaraki grunts at him. “I said you could fucking join the league, didn’t I?”

Dabi shakes his head at the younger villain before angling his body towards Hawks. He gestures towards the papers. “Despite our public appearances, our goal isn’t destruction, as you know at this point. It’s always been about corrupt heroes.” Hawks tilts his head.

“But the top 5? Disregarding my person opinions of them, I’m not sure what you’d find on the heroes that spend their lives with the media.” Dabi gives him a sickly grin, eyes dark.

“Like we’d find nothing on you, number 2?”

Hawks opens his mouth at that, then closes it again. “Ah, point taken. But I’ve always viewed myself as unique.” Toga giggles at that and Hawks twirls his fork on his plate, keeping his eyes on Dabi. The villain’s comment wasn’t malicious or accusatory, just matter of fact.

Hawks had to agree with him. Hawks was the number 2, and the media loved him. That didn’t mean anything when it came to his file though. Even outside what he was doing with the League, the Commission had been using him as a spec-ops for years before his pro hero debut. After he went fully public, those types of missions had become far less common. But they still did happen. He had still done those missions. He can still remember the exact orders he had been given.

Surely, however, Hawks had to be different. He couldn’t even entertain the thought of Beast Jeanist or Miruko agreeing to such things. Endeavor hardly had a quirk or personality suited for underground work.

It was a little funny that they were turning a blind eye to Hawks when he was the worst of them all, and the proof was sitting heavy in his jacket.

“But honestly, Hawks, it’s not a question of is there corruption in these heroes. I specifically wanted our dear number 1’s file, the others were just a side thought. The files were necessary because not only can we back up what we’re saying, but we also have proof that the Hero Public Safety Commission knew about it.” Dabi’s eyes are gleaming now, and Hawks can tell he’s not really seeing him. The villain is somewhere else right now.

Hawks chews his lip to hold back his disbelief. Endeavor? What, exactly, does Dabi know about the man that’s so incriminating? How could he know? His logic doesn’t make sense anyway. If Endeavor was such a bad person, the Commission would not just let it happen. Everyday they made sure Hawks was the best hero he could be. The held him to the highest standards so he wouldn’t let Japan down.

If the HPSC had information that a hero wasn’t doing that, they would definitely act. He absolutely wasn’t going to voice these concerns to Dabi, however. The villain’s manic grin made a ball of anxiety swirl in the hero’s stomach. He resists the urge to clasp his hands together in a nervous gesture and keeps twirling his fork on his plate.

But then why was Dabi so sure of himself? And after today, could Hawks honestly still tell himself that he knew the Commission?

Hawks takes another bite of the pasta and the unfamiliar texture hits him before anything else. He freezes, blinking in shock with the food still in his mouth. Saliva builds up in his mouth quickly, and unlike his recent trend, this time it was not caused by the need to puke. He chews again, slowly, unable to even think of doing anything else.

He didn’t want to think of doing anything else.

Hawks knows he can’t have meat. He knows it brings out bad qualities of his quirk. He knows it leads to weight gain. He knows it’s not part of his meal plan. He knows his Handler would be beyond angry with him.

Hawks looks down at his plate, at the chicken suspiciously pushed around. He slowly stabs a small piece and brings it up to his lips. His mouth won’t stop watering, but his brain is so, so so quiet. His head is never this silent, his senses hardly ever this focused on one source of stimuli.

The hero can’t even spare his Handler an afterthought as he picks all of the chicken out of the noodles and vegetables.

When it’s gone, he quietly denies an offer for more and instead drops both his hands below the bar to rub his palm with his thumb. He watches the motion carefully. He feels calm, so calm, and his never been so satiated in his life.

Hawks knows he can’t have meat. He knows this is wrong.

So why is this the best he’s felt in a long, long time?

The Commission wants what’s best for him, they always have. They made him who he was. So, why did they lie to him? Maybe meat could be bad for him, will be bad in a few hours. In a few days. Maybe if he ate in consistently, and they were just trying to protect him.

But what about his name?

What’s bad about Takami Keigo? And all the pages past that?

Hawks glances at Dabi next to him who has hardly touched his plate and is instead pointing at something on Shigaraki’s screen. Shigaraki is scowling at him, telling him to shut up, but Hawks can tell the little character on the screen is moving in that direction. Toga is trying to grab one of Spinner’s bugs but the mutant is swatting her hand away, insisting that they’re for him and she won’t even like them. She pouts at him and he narrows his eyes, stubborn. His tail lashes as she lunges yet again and he catches her with one hand, pushing back.

Hawks knows they are purposefully keeping their attention away from him. He knows they’re sneaking glances at the hero every chance they get. He knows Shigaraki hasn’t been doing anything but running in circles on the game while Dabi points out irrelevant objects. He knows Compress has stirred the food far more times than there’s reason too. He knows when Toga actually wants something, she pulls out her knives. He knows she has knives on her.

“Dabi?’ Hawks’ voice is hardly above a whisper, but the villain hears him nonetheless and turns towards him, waiting. “Can I talk to you for a minute?” Dabi searches his face for a moment but nods and stands up. Hawks follows him across the room. Dabi settles a shoulder against the wall.

Hawks doesn’t bother imitating his demeanor. He keeps his eyes trained on his boots, thinking. Dabi is silent, patient in a way he never was before that night in Hawks’ apartment.

Hawks looks up at Dabi. At his eyes, his jawline, his nose, his scars. He takes a deep breath; he needs to know. He needs to know this more than he can ever remember needing something. “You knew my name.” Dabi hesitates, meetings his gaze.

“…Yeah.” His voice is rough, like he needs to clear it but won’t.

“I only have one file containing my person information, and it was the one in that safe.”

“Looks like.”

“You’re about my age. At least 21, no older than 30.” Dabi quirks an eyebrow at him, feigning a bored look.

Hawks can sense his reluctance to answer, can almost taste it in the air. Like a predator.

“Uh huh.”

“You knew me.” Hawks notes that the room is silent. Everyone straining to hear their conversation, most likely. Whatever. Hawks is sick and tired of things being kept from him. He’s tired of always being in the dark about his own life.

“In some type of way.”

Hawks wants to rip his hair out. He’s not dumb. He’s never been dumb. Hawks has lived his entire life learning how to use his quirk to its fullest. His quirk has always been more than just some feathers. “What is this? What are you all trying to do?” Hawks’ voice is rising, but it doesn’t matter. Every person in the room seems to be in on it anyway. Except for him. Never him.

Dabi’s face is blank, impassive, he doesn’t move off the wall. Hawks takes a step towards him. “I’m not as dense as I act. You know that. Everything that’s happened tonight, I know that it all had a part in whatever this is.” He swings an arm out to gesture at the room. “You just wanted Endeavor’s file. Everyone else’s was just an excuse to get me this.” Hawks rips his own papers out of his jacket. The sound of them is unreasonably loud in the otherwise silent room. “You wanted me to have this. Have my file. Why!” Hawks meets his eyes, begging. Desperate for someone to just tell him why.

“Keigo-“

“Stop! Calling me that!” The hero’s chest is heaving, frantic. “My name is Hawks, only Hawks. Only Hawks. And I don’t want this.” He shoves the paper’s into Dabi’s chest. Unlike earlier, however, the villain doesn’t grab them and they flutter to the floor as Hawks lets go. “Don’t ask, don’t tell. What bullshit! You already know exactly what’s in there, don’t you? Are you trying to torment me?”

At the silence, Hawks can’t stop a few feathers from detaching and sharpening. They’re clears threats, hovering around the hero. Daring anyone to approach him.

“Hawks, please-“ Kurogiri speaks up for the first time, while the others look to each other for guidance.

“So, What?” Dabi cuts him off, voice cold, mouth in a sharp line. He pushes off the wall finally, standing up straight in the face of Hawks’ manic desperation. “Are you going to the Commission and tell them you failed yet again? Have yet another freak-out about how you failed to make her proud?”

Hawks’ distantly processes a subdued groan and a muttered “fucking idiot” from the League members still at the bar. He ignores it.

Because, suddenly, Hawks understands. He understands why. Why all of this is happening.

They know. About the Commission. About the president. Beyond what he was ever authorized to tell them. They heard, but how?

Hawks mind flashes back to his last visit to this bar when he was distracted. When Dabi held his hands and Compress massaged his shoulder. He raises a hand, to where the man touched him. He was wearing a different outfit today; it wouldn’t be on him. But it was the jacket he wore every day, to every meeting with them.

The Commission told him, they always told him to never let his guard down. No matter the who they were, no matter the situation.

The one time.

The one time he allows it to happen, to accept someone’s comfort, and they fucking bug him.

Hawks wants to scream. He wants to cry. His wings ache to beat the air.

Why can’t he ever just listen to the Commission? They want what’s best for him.

Keigo, that dumb rabbit from earlier, the file, the dinner.

Hawks laughs suddenly, eyes burning as he looks up at the arsonist. Dabi meets his gaze, a confused sneer distorting the line of his scars. “Dabi” the hero can’t keep the amusement out of his voice, “Don’t tell me you’re trying to save me.”

Dabi is clearly angry, Hawks can feel the heat pouring off of him and it only makes him feel more hysterical. “I was confused, I didn’t understand why they did this, but I get it now. I do. My name is Hawks. It has always been Hawks, and I will always be Hawks. You’re looking for someone that isn’t there. Just as Touya isn’t there in you, anymore, Dabi.”

Dabi jerks back slightly, face contorting in both anger and shock. Hawks brings his feathers back and is out the door before a single word can be said.

He’s racing home as fast as he’s ever flown.

His eyes burn.

His head hurts.

In the League of Villains hideout, Kurogiri doesn’t waste a second as he opens a portal in front of Dabi to an uninhabited area. He closes it behind the man before the immediate flare of blue can come back through.

The room is silent for a moment. “I… didn’t expect for tonight to go this way.” Shigaraki doesn’t say anything, just stares at the screen of his Switch as his character idles in an open field.

Compress rubs where his eyebrow would be below his mask. He’s throat feels closed with guilt. The magician doesn’t think he’s going to forget the look on Hawks’ face when he realized he was bugged, the look of hurt, betrayal, and then immediate acceptance that followed as he raised his hand to his own shoulder.

Toga, even, is subdued as well. “I really didn’t think he would catch on so quickly.”

“We underestimated him, then. I never thought he was dense!”

Chapter Text

Dabi spends four whole days stress-checking the news every hour to see if anyone is talking about his name. His real name, despite whatever impression Hawks’ seems to have of identities.

His stress is unfounded, however, when he receives a text from Hawks on the fifth day of silence.

H- ‘I don’t know what to do’

Dabi frowns down at his phone. He struggles with himself for only a few seconds on where to take this conversation.

D- ‘What do you want to do?’

H- ‘I don’t know’

H- ‘I think I know what I should do. What I’m supposed to do.’

Dabi knows whatever that is, isn’t good for him. Regardless, Hawks wouldn’t be asking this if he wasn’t looking for a reason to resist his conditioning. The hero has the ability, Dabi’s seen it appear more and more since the first day Hawks lied to the Commission President.

D- ‘So why are you asking me?’

Dabi starts to regret the risk he took when his phone is silent for hours after the last text. The next text he receives proves the risk worth it, however. Dabi let’s out a heavy sigh and briefly rests his forehead on his hands in relief.

H- ‘I don’t want to do it’

H- ‘Can we meet up?’

Dabi doubts Hawks recognizes how suspicious the request is after what they were just talking about. Nevertheless, he can tell the hero’s mind is somewhere else right now. He’s not focused on his mission. If that were the case, he already had access straight to Shigaraki through the League’s base.

D- ‘Yeah, meet at Danto’s.’

Danto’s was a front for where Dabi picked up his meds. It was also, conveniently, just outside the range of Hawks’ patrol route today. Dabi had already sent the hero there before on one of his own petty errands when he was waiting for the man to get tired of chasing goose for the league.

Dabi checks the time on his phone while throwing on a black sweatshirt to cover his arms. A mask covers the scars on his face well enough. The rest were fine, Dabi’s face wasn’t publicly known anyway. It was more for his own comfort of people staring than anything.

He could get a lift from Kurogiri, but if he just walked there he would reach the destination around the end of the hero’s patrol.

Plus, he could pickpocket some people on his way to keep his mind off of the impending conversation.

He sends a quick prayer that said conversation is more about Keigo and less about Touya.

Dabi is flipping through some man’s cards when he hears Hawks’ descent. Dabi glances up at him to see his, once again, bright red wings retract tightly to his back. The hero shoves his gloved hands into his pockets and watches Dabi with a raised eyebrow as the villain holds out an ID to him. “You wanna return that? No? Lower than your paygrade? Psh, heroes.” He drops the card to the ground. Hawks’ eyes follow its descent before looking back up at him. “You gonna tell me why I dragged my ass out here, or…?”

Hawks takes a deep breath before quickly releasing it. “I don’t understand what you’re trying to do.”

“You seemed sure of yourself before.” Hawks frowns at his flippant attitude, clearly not in the mindset for his games.

“Yeah, sure, but why? It’s not because of who we are- were. You didn’t care before.” Dabi tenses slightly at his matter-of-fact voice. It wasn’t accusatory, bitter, or malicious. That made it far worse, for some reason. It should have been.

“What do you mean, why? I told you the League’s goal. You fit into that.” Dabi watches as Hawks throws his hands into the air.

“No, I don’t. You know that, you know exactly what I was trained for, what I’ve done off camera. How I’ve lied to the League, to others.”

Dabi calmly looks back at him. “Did you ever have a choice? Did you ever want to?” Hawks is silent, meeting his gaze with a look of despair. “Besides, I’ve done worse, I’m sure.” He shrugs and looks away from Hawks.

“You’re not the one pretending to be a hero! You’re not-“ Dabi startles as Hawks cuts off and lunges for him. The next second, he’s on his ass staring up at Hawks’ back as he faces down the alleyway. Dabi slowly stands up as he spots the woman he’s facing. Her eyes are glowing red. Never a good sign with quirks, to be honest. He frowns as Hawks sends a feather and hits a forcefield surrounding her.

The frown deepens when a streak of red shoots out from the forcefield and lodges into the brick wall behind them. A forcefield with projectiles? So not fair. Why did he get the lamest quirk that literally kills him?

“Back off.” Dabi tries, removing his mask. It was worth a shot; more villains knew his face than not.

The woman only glares at him. “You back off, this piece of shit ruined my life.” Dabi resists the urge to roll his eyes.

“What, he send your hubby to jail? It’s his job, get over it.” The woman shrieks in anger and sends out multiple projectiles at once, far larger than the other one and still connected to the field around her.

Dabi feels a feather pull him out of the way as Hawks himself takes to the air and shoots towards their attacker. He expertly dodges the snaking tendrils and turns so his foot meets the shield, clearly testing the barrier. A small burst of red knocks him back but he quickly reorients and continues dodging her attack.

Dabi stays back as he picks up the hero’s goal is to let the woman tire herself out. All quirks have different limits, but they all have them in the end. Hawks’ stamina is almost unmatched, however. His limit tended to be the resource his feathers rather than the use of them. And this woman couldn’t destroy his feathers with her attack, and she certainly wasn’t fast enough to land a hit on the hero himself.

In retrospect, Dabi really should have expected her to change tactics after few minutes of her visibly becoming more frustrated.

He can barely think to move as several of the tendrils shoot straight for him.

In the end, he doesn’t have to move. Hawks is there in a flash of red, taking the hit for him.

The hero barely let’s out a grunt as her quirk goes straight through the man’s shoulder, right below his collarbone and next to his armpit. The second hit goes through right above his hip. Hawks falls to his knees with a stifled noise, eyes wide as her quirk starts to pulse red.

Dabi is stepping around the hero and lighting up the alley with blue before she can even finish her gleeful laugh.

It was an ugly laugh anyway.

By the time her field is broken and she’s nothing but dust in the wind, most of Dabi’s sweatshirt has burnt away and he’s breathing smoke with every exhale. The lines of his scars steam. He turns towards Hawks, who has fully fallen to the ground and is breathing shallowly, eyes lidded. Through the holes in his uniform, Dabi can see the quirk hasn’t actually punctured anything but has left deep black star shapes with lines snaking out of it into his skin.

They look like they’re moving.

Dabi drops to his knees next to him, hands hovering. Hawks’ eyes are glazed over as he stares at the bricks, unseeing.

There is one downside to Danto’s location.

It’s ridiculously close to one stupid-ass school.

Dabi, as gently as he dares, scoops Hawks into his arms. “Quite whining, I’m getting you help.” Hawks hasn’t made a sound, only a horrible, quiet wheeze with every weak breath. The lines are creeping up his neck.

There’s no other choice, there’s not enough time.

Dabi gets to the gates in a couple minutes and brings it down with a burst of flame from his foot. It’s more power than he can afford at this point, but there’s nothing else he can do. At minimum, it’ll alert the UA staff. Honestly, he really expected better security here. Now the League kind of looked dumb with their convoluted plans.

At the fault of some dumbass contractor, the closest building to these gates is not anything useful. Regardless it’s his only choice. He kicks the door several times and glares down at the yellow-haired kid who opens it. Said kid meets his gaze for a total of two seconds before he starts yelling for help.

“Shut the fuck up, does it look like I’m trying to kill you!? Christ!” The kid shuts his mouth more out of shock than anything before finally looking at Dabi’s arms and his eyes widen even further.

“Oh my god, is that-?”

“Kaminari! What’s wrong- holy shit!”

“Someone get Aizawa!”

“Sero, bind him up!”

“I can’t, he’s holding Hawks hostage!”

Dabi let’s out a scream of rage that makes all of the little beasts around him shut up at once. “I didn’t fucking kidnap him, he needs help! Like, 20 minutes ago! Go get fucking help!” A green haired kid is the first to take a step towards him, eyes on Hawks before flicking up to Dabi’s face than back to Hawks. The tendrils are up his jaw, almost reaching his lips. Hawks’ eyes have fully closed and Dabi can barely feel his chest moving anymore. Dabi sees Hawks’ old intern approach the back of the group. “You, smaller bird, help him. Please.” Dabi chokes out the last word but can’t think of anything else to say. Unlike the others, the emo kid doesn’t hesitate, and his quirk immediately shoots out and gently takes Hawks from him. Dabi has to forcefully unclench his hands to let the hero go.

He pays the tape binding his arms to his body no mind as he watches a dark-haired girl pull an oxygen mask and mini tank from her chest. She latches it around the blonde’s head and puts a hand on his chest, the other pinching his wrist for a pulse. “Iida, get him to Recovery Girl now. This isn’t going to help for long. Speed is priority over his comfort here.”

A tall boy with engines in his legs steps forward with a nod and picks up Hawks before disappearing from the building in seconds. The green-haired kid is on the phone with someone, speaking quickly.

Another kid who looks like a special edition version of Eraserhead approaches him. “Why the hell did you try to kill the #2 hero?”

Dabi sneers at him. “Obviously I didn’t fuc-“

“Sleep.” The kid cuts him off and Dabi barely has a second to think ‘fuck’ before his head is dropping forward and the world fades around him.

Hawks had to go in. Why was he standing here? This information was top priority, it was literally the reason for his mission. He met Shigaraki, he knows their base’s location, he knows their plan to release confidential information, he knows there was a security breech, he knows who Dabi is.

They know he’s a traitor, but he has the information. The mission is over. It’s time to report in and reveal everything he’s worked for, what he’s accomplished.

He did exactly what they wanted.

So why

Is he

Standing here

Hawks crouches down in the tree he’s perched in.  His hand curls around the thick branch so tightly the bark starts cracking.

How long has he been out here?

A ringing sends his wings sprawling behind him to keep his balance on the branch. With his free hand, he slowly pulls out his phone.

His Handler

With a start, Hawks glances at the time and frantically answers the call.

“Pro hero Hawks-“

“What took you so long to answer?”

“Ah, I wasn’t ready, actually.”

“You weren’t ready.” It’s not a question, just an echo to convey his disappointment.

Hawks swallows. “Yes, something happened with the league-“

“And you weren’t going to report it?”

“Yes, Sir, I am. But I just left-“

“I don’t care what you’re doing with them, you need to meet your hit times.”

God, could he stop interrupting him and just let him speak? “I understand, Sir, but the mission-“

“The mission won’t mean anything if you let yourself fall apart.” Hawks resist the urge to crush his phone. Answering on the second ring instead of the first was hardly falling apart, in his opinion. But what does he know, right?

“Yes, Sir.”

“Report, then.”

“I was… at their hideout-“

“And you still, somehow, don’t know its location. Yeah, got it.” Hawks wants to scream into the phone’s receiver. Shut up, shut up, does he even want him to report about a top priority mission with the most dangerous group since All For One was active?

Or did he just want to insult him for the entire duration of this phone call?

“They were having dinner-“

“You didn’t break your meal plan, did you? Hawks, anything outside of what we prepared for you will make you extremely unwell.”

“Ah-“

“Did you? Take immediate action now, I know you have Ipecac. If that doesn’t work, do it manually.”

Manually? Like, what? Shove a toothbrush into his throat? What if he doesn’t, are they going to hold him down and make it happen one way or another just like when he was a kid who gave in to his urges during field training?

Hawks freezes at the sudden memory.

At the hands on his wrists, faceless bodies looming over him, at his screaming, at his taloned fingers reaching for the dead mouse inches from his grasp. At the fingers prying his jaw open, squeezing below his ears.

“-wks. Hawks!” Hawks startles at the yelling in his ear.

“Sorry, Sir. What?”

There’s a moment of silence and Hawks can almost hear the man grinding his teeth over his phone.

“You know what, Hawks? You’ve proven yourself incapable enough times. I’ll handle this, as I always have to. Trash the planned meal and go to bed. I’ll be at the Commission at 0530 tomorrow. Be there before me.”

“Yes, sir.” The man hangs up, but Hawks doesn’t move for a long moment. Hawks stands up slowly, gently sliding the phone into his pocket.

The man hadn’t even let him speak. Didn’t let him actually report a single fucking thing.

But when does it matter what Hawks has to say, right? Everyone else always seems to know what’s best for him. What he needs. What he should do. How he should do it. Why the hell should he get a say in his own life?

Clearly he’s so fucking incompetent. He was only scouted at 7 years old, trained his entire life, became the youngest #2 hero in history, and infiltrated a group of S rank villains in a matter of months.

Maybe the Commission knows what’s best for him, maybe they molded his life, but this was his mission. This is exactly what they trained him for. What he bled and cried for.

If the Hero Public Safety Commission was never going to trust Hawks to be a hero, why did they even kill Takami Keigo?

Hawks shoots into the air. The wind covers the shaking of the leaves from the force of his wings.

Hawks flies straight home.

Fuck you, Neikan.

Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuckyoufuckyoufuckyou

Chapter Text

Honestly, Dabi wasn’t that stupid. Yes, he fell for the purple-haired kid’s trick once. He wasn’t dumb enough to do it a second time. It was clear his quirk was connected to speaking in some way. So, the arsonist fell back on the old tactic of just glaring the occupants of the room down.

No way was he going to say shit when the hero student was wearing that suspicious bullshit on his face.

“Dabi, what are the affects of the quirk Hawks was hit with? We need to know to treat him.”

Yeah, no. Again, Dabi wasn’t stupid. He had made it very clear his silence was a result of the kid he had kept his glare on for the duration of this entire interrogation. If UA actually needed this information, not that Dabi knew it, they would have had the kid leave the room to hopefully make him comply.

Yet they hadn’t. Meaning this information was not as time sensitive as they were pretending and their true goal here was to get him to talk.

Dabi attempts to activate his quirk again, only to have the inhibitors cuffing his wrists together beep loudly. The action has its desired affect as Eraserhead can’t prevent his scowl at the villain.

The underground hero steps forward and Dabi looks up to meet his gaze, unwavering.

"Why were you with him? Why did you save him?” Dabi doesn’t look away. Just holds his gaze, emotionless.

“You have to realize how incriminating this situation is for Hawks. He’s not awake, and you refuse to talk. We only have to assume we have to detain him.” For the first time since this talk started, Dabi can’t help but react.

At the implication that Hawks has done something wrong, by only following orders and then taking action to save a villain, Dabi’s eyes tighten into a glare. The villain’s eyebrows furrow and he fights to keep a snarl off his face.

Aizawa’s eyes gleam at the reaction.

“Who attacked Hawks?” At that, Dabi finally, finally offers a response. He shrugs up at Eraserhead. “Do you know why?” Dabi shakes his head reluctantly. He doesn’t want to be cooperative in any sense of the word. But if this attack had a bigger meaning, Dabi could deal with being helpful if it meant UA would investigate the situation.

“So, it wasn’t you?’ Dabi rolls his eyes hard at the kid and holds in a sigh. Obviously, it wasn’t fucking him. Unless he had some secret quirk change everyone knows about but him.

Dabi’s eyes flick back to the pro heroes in the room as a woman in a weirdly sexual outfit checks her phone and approaches Eraserhead. She puts her hand on his shoulder and they briefly meet eyes before stepping out of the room, purple-haired student in tow.

Dabi watches them go before knocking his head back onto the hard metal chair. If he had to guess, they were killing time with him until Hawks woke up. So, they leave the room and Hawks is probably not dead. A win-win.

Hawks is beyond anxious when he wakes up. The room is silent, every muscle in his body tingles like they’re about to bust out of his skin, and he has no idea where the fuck he is.

He’s struggling to sit up, paused to glare at his uncooperative arms when the door opens. He falls back down onto his back when his focus changes and stares at the door with wide eyes.

When he sees Eraserhead and Present Mic enter he closes his eyes for a second and takes a deep breath to calm his racing heart. He doesn’t know what they know about the situation, but at least it’s not the Commission.

After taking that hit in the alley, Dabi must have brough him to UA to get help. Beyond that, Hawks has no idea what’s going on.

He doesn’t like not knowing things.

Aizawa looks him up and down, and Hawks lets him, unspeaking.

“Hawks, it’s good that you’re awake. You had us worried there. Recovery Girl says it’s a miracle she was able to get to you not a minute later.” Present Mic is the one who initiates the conversation.

Hawks doesn’t acknowledge the information that he very nearly died. Given his line of work, Hawks barely blinked at close calls at this point. “Yeah, sorry to send this place into a frenzy, I’m sure. Mind telling me how I got here?” He flashes a bashful grin, as if he’s embarrassed by not knowing.

“So, you don’t remember?” Aizawa finally asks. Ah, there we go. Into the interrogation.

Hawks sighs lightly and looks away from them at the wall before looking back again, as if trying to recall something. “Nah, not really. Just that I was attacked. I don’t even know who they were, honestly, or what they wanted.”

“So, it wasn’t Dabi?” Ah, so Dabi did get involved with them in the process. But where was he now? Did he get away? Did they capture him?  

Hawks laughs quietly as if he asked a silly question. It wasn’t rude, but conveyed he thought the notion was ridiculous. “Unless the dude had a drastic quirk change, I doubt it.”

Aizawa nods, pursing his lips. “That’s fair. But then, why did an infamous S rank villain show up at my student’s dorm cradling your dying body in his arms?”

Oh. Yikes.

Hawks hated working with underground heroes. They noticed too many things, came to their own conclusions too easily, and were therefore harder to maneuver in an interaction.

There was really nothing he could say that wouldn’t sound suspicious as fuck.

Hawks drops all pretense and looks away from them to stare impassively at the wall instead. He should call the Commission to do damage control.

After a moment of silence, Aizawa speaks up again. “Last chance to give us some information before we have to forfeit our right to hold him and turn him in to Tartarus.”

That gets a true reaction out of Hawks and he snaps his eyes back towards them. “You can’t!” Dabi didn’t deserve to go to Tartarus, he didn’t. And definitely not for getting Hawks help. That’s beyond cruel. Tartarus is beyond cruel.

“Why are you defending him?” Present Mic frowns at him. Not accusing, but genuinely curious.

Hawks swallows heavily, twisting his hands into the sheets of the bed. Using the muscles sends a simultaneous feeling of numbness and pins up his arms. Regardless, he can’t let go. “He… he was trying to… save me.”

He shouldn’t be talking about this.

“Yeah, we noticed. But why did he get you help?” Hawks shakes his head at Aizawa’s question. That’s not it, that’s not what he meant.

“No, before that. Before that fight. He was trying to save me before.” Aizawa and Mic exchange looks of confusion before turning back to Hawks.

God, he needs to call the Commission. He can’t talk about this. They’re going to know about the mission. But the mission’s over, isn’t it? But he never reported in. Was it over? Can he talk about it? Is he allowed to?

“Save you from what, Hawks?” Hawks curls his fingers tighter in the fabric. The feeling in his muscles makes him shiver slightly.

“From-“ He stops, words catching in his throat. “From.” Again, he chokes on the words. He raises a shaking hand to his throat.

Why can’t he say it?

“I can’t, I can’t, I can’t. From- oh, God.” Becoming alarmed by the man unraveling in front of them, Present Mic steps closer to Hawks. Hawks looks up at him, eyes wide. His ungloved hand, where are his gloves, has risen to his mouth at some point. The cut talons on his fingers are digging into the skin of his face. He’s scared. Unsure.

Present Mic frowns deeply at him, but he’s not angry. Just worried, Hawks could tell. He gently wraps his hand around Hawks’ and pries his fingers away. They leave little red pinpricks where they punctured the skin.

He needs to file them again.

“Hawks, you want to tell us.” It’s not so much a question, but Hawks nods anyway. Mic is still holding his hand. Hawks can’t keep his eyes off the contact.

People aren’t supposed to touch him.

He can’t let him touch him.

“But something is physically stopping you.” To that, he doesn’t respond. Just ducks his head lower, keeping his gaze on the hand. Mic waits a moment before speaking again, “We have a hero student who can compel people, Hawks. Would you be willing to talk with him?”

Compel him? That sounds horribly invasive. Hawks doesn’t want anyone in his head. He can just tell them himself. He can just say Dabi was trying to save him from the Commission. He can.

He can’t open his mouth.

Hawks, slowly, slowly nods. He hears the door open and Aizawa muttering a few words. Another set of footsteps accompanies him back inside. Clearly, this student was already waiting for an invitation in.

“Hello, Hawks-san.” Hawks doesn’t look up at him. “My name is Shinso. When people respond to questions I ask them, I am able to control them to a certain extent. Only simple commands. Do you agree to the use of my quirk?” Hawks offers a small nod. “Okay. What is you name?”

“Hawks” He responds quietly. The second he does; Hawks feels separated from the world. Like a field has fallen over him and him alone, cutting him off.

The feeling makes panic rise in his chest. He didn’t like it.

“Why were you with Dabi?”

That wasn’t the question he thinks viciously. They were supposed to ask about the Commission.

“I asked to meet up with him. I wanted to ask why he was doing this.” Hawks’ mouth moves without instruction. He hates the feeling.

“Doing what?”

“A lot of things. Encouraging my instincts, inviting me around for non-mission things. Why he gave me my file.” Hawks wants to lunge at the kid. Shake him until he gets the fuck out of his head.

Shinso narrows his eyes at Hawks, intense. Almost a mirror image of Aizawa. “Why are you familiar with Dabi?”

Suddenly, the feeling comes back and once again he chokes on the words. Except, this time, he can’t stop. He gasps horribly, trying to pull air. The kid lifts his hand, spread out towards Hawks, and leans forward slightly as if he’s exerting force against something.

The thickness of his throat slowly fades. “I’ve been assigned to infiltrate the League of Villains, Dabi was my contact.” Hawks can feel the tension in the room drop at the words. The kid’s face relaxes considerably. Understandably, he was relived that the #2 hero hadn’t just turned tail.

“Okay. Okay, what do you mean by file?” The question is entirely less loaded, like he’s stopped viewing Hawks as a target.

“My Commission file. We stole a few files but he gave me mine, wanted me to keep it.”

Aizawa speaks up for the first time since the kid entered the room. “Ask him what Dabi was trying to save him from.” As if that wasn’t the question they were supposed to fucking start with. Until they fucking lied to take his control from him.

Shinso nods, not looking away from Hawks. “What was Dabi trying to save you from?”

“The Commission.”

The room goes silent for a moment, a heavy pause of confusion. Shinso asks before he’s prompted. “Why… do you need saving from the Hero Public Safety Commission?”

Well, that’s the thing, isn’t it? That’s what Dabi doesn’t understand. What the League of Villains doesn’t understand.

“I don’t." Hawks answers weakly, more to himself than anyone in the room. Then, firmer, "I don’t. I don’t- know. They take care of me, help me. They made me a hero. I don’t need to be saved.” The same confused franticness from earlier returns. Except, this time, he’s able to speak.

Aizawa’s eyes darken during his rambling. He puts a hand out towards Shinso, gesturing for him to stop. Suddenly, the field over him falls. He drops his head again. Curls his fingers violently into the sheets. He can’t look at the kid, not yet. Not until he calms down. “Hawks, that’s enough for now. Please, continue to rest. We will return later.”

“Dabi-“

Aizawa cuts him off before he can ask. “Will remain here for the time being. Until we fully understand this situation.” With that, the pro heroes and student leave the room in a line. Hawks stares at the closed door a few seconds before falling onto his back.

A shiver racks through his entire body. He swears he can feel each muscle fiber individually contracting and expanding, but they’re not moving at all.

Well, there.

He told them Dabi was just trying to help him, albeit for no reason because Hawks didn’t need help. UA, out of anyone, would understand why hero standards need to be enforced. The League just wouldn’t get it because they’re villains.

UA would understand.

The group is silent as they leave Hawks’ room. The man’s inability to speak on the topic without literally being forced to with a quirk was sending up something beyond red flags.

Even with Shinso’s quirk, Hawks could barely get the words out. Still looked like he was in pain to even suggest the truth.

Aizawa had seen plenty of dark things. He was an underground hero. He was the one to handle smaller situations, the darker parts of society. Away from flashy fights on the news.

Aizawa knew how abuse victims acted, their rhetoric that they don’t need help. The fear when anyone suggested otherwise that their situation is not right. Their denial to themselves and everyone around them that something was even wrong.

He did not like what he was seeing in Hawks. Not at all. The man was the #2 pro hero, sure, but he was a kid too. Not so different from Aizawa's oldest students.

Hizashi doesn’t protest when he heads straight back for Dabi’s room and pushes the door open. The villain looks up at him, eyes just as cold as before.

Aizawa still had too many questions, but he was not forcing Hawks though another second of that. He didn’t have the same reservations about the villain in front of him, however, regardless of his role in this situation.

“Dabi. We spoke to Hawks.” Aizawa doesn’t miss how he fully garners Dabi’s attention at the statement. Whatever the reason, Dabi was invested in Hawks right now. He could play to that. “He defended you, so let’s give this a second try. Why were you with Hawks?”

Hawks had already told him the situation, but Aizawa needed specifics. He wanted to hear Dabi’s side.

However, the villain still doesn’t respond. Even with the assurance that Hawks was on his side, he was not taking any chances.

Aizawa had to admit he was smart for that, at least. “Dabi, understand that we are trying to get a grasp on this situation. We are only back here because Hawks could not physically speak on it on his own. With help, it still looked like it caused him pain.” Dabi’s nostrils flare in anger and Aizawa has no doubt that if he had access to his quirk right now, the villain would be steaming.

Interesting.

After a moment, Aizawa sighs heavily. He turns towards Shinso and gestures for him to step out. The kid makes a face at him and he returns it with an unimpressed look of his own. Shinso only rolls his eyes before leaving the room. Teenagers.

Dabi watches him go. The room is still silent. “Hawks-“

“His name is Keigo, did you know that?” Aizawa pauses at the sudden interruption and considers his question. It’s common knowledge about Hawks that his personal life is completely private. It’s interesting, that Dabi knows his true name. He doesn’t particularly know why this matters, however.

“No.” He frowns at the villain who glares right back up at him.

“No? Oh that’s crazy, Neither did he.” Dabi’s words are nonchalant, but he’s angry. Furious, even.

…what?

“How could you forget your own name?” Aizawa understood that the man didn’t really use it. Regardless, he can’t fathom how that could happen.

“Forget? Interesting word choice. Personally, I’d use stolen.”

Dabi was trying to save him from the commission, huh?

“I can’t do anything about this situation if you continue to be cryptid.”

The villain snorts at him, flashing a sick grin. “I have no reason to believe you’d do anything regardless.”

“What, exactly, is you plan here?” The villain pauses and looks away form Aizawa for the first time. “You don’t have one. You’re stuck here, without a backup plan. Because you didn’t plan an escape at all or anything of the sort. This was last minute. Hawks needed help and you brought him to the first place that could provide that. Regardless of the situation it put you in.”

Dabi glares at him but has nothing to retort with. Nothing to disagree with. That’s answer enough.

“If you cooperate, I’ll let you see him.” The villain looks genuinely shocked at the offer before his face quickly returns to it’s permanent look of disgust.

“If I can talk to him, I’ll follow his lead.”

Ah, he doesn’t want to say anything about Hawks without first speaking to him. Another smart move. “How respectful, Villain.” Dabi sneers at him but doesn’t say anything else. “If Hawks consents to this, I’m agreeable. But he’s resting right now so you’re going to have to stare at the wall for a few hours.” Aizawa turns his back to the villain still cuffed to the chair and follows Hitoshi out of the small holding room.

“Not that that’s anything new.” Aizawa smirks to himself at Dabi’s muttered comment. He has been in that white room for a rather long time, by now.

He could deal with it. Might give him some time to rethink his life decisions.

Chapter Text

Laying in bed was doing the exact opposite of making Hawks feel better. He doesn’t exactly know how to explain that to the staff, however.

He has stuff to do. Hawks has to report in to the Commission daily, they’re going to lose their collective minds if he goes off the grid. Unfortunately, there is no phone on Hawks or anywhere else in the room. He’s checked many, many times. Enough times that someone in scrub bottoms comes in and squeaks out a request for him to please rest.

Hawks complies, only because he doesn’t know if he’s allowed outside of the room and at this point, he can say with pretty high confidence that there’s nothing in here to find.

Laying on the bed, however, is not going to stop him from flipping over and spreading his wings out and retracting them every few minutes. The muscle usage sends a horrible, crawling feeling up and down his entire spine to the tips of his toes. He repeats the action anyway.

He was taught to fight with limbs that have fallen asleep. The feeling of fighting with no blood circulation can be the difference between life and death when your job can easily cause extreme blood loss.

This feeling wasn’t the same, not at all, but it was something to do. Something new to train.

He pushes himself up onto his elbows and looks out the window before dropping onto his face and sighing into the pillow for what’s probably the 75^th time.

God, this was a disaster. Hawks recognized Dabi was trying to do what he thought was right, but it was unnecessary. Hawks could handle the Commission on his own, he always had. Now here they were, both stuck at a hero school. Hawks had patrols to get to, training to do, a house to clean.

He couldn’t just sit here for hours pretending his wing exercises were doing anything.

A gentle knock on the door has the hero pushing himself back up and turning over to look. After a moment he calls out “uh, come in.” The door opens and Recovery Girl enters.

“How are you feeling, Hawks?” She asks, approaching him.

He sits up fully now, far more capable of controlling his rebelling body. “Good to go.” He says cheerfully, flashing a bright smile.

The short woman only stares back at him, unimpressed. “You aren’t feeling any lasting effects?”

Hawks pauses for a moment, thinking. He wasn’t technically supposed to talk about his health to others, but Recovery Girl was a doctor. A doctor employed at UA, no less. “Well, no, I am. My muscles don’t feel any different. But I can move well enough now.”

To his dismay, her frown only deepens. “And you consider that good to go? Hawks, that quirk very nearly killed you. There are very few things I can’t heal to a patient’s optimal health. It’s vital we are very careful here.”

Hawks resists the urge to duck his head at the reprimand. “Oh…uh-“ He stops short in his excuse when she approaches him and holds her palm out for his hand.

“May I?” Hawks nods slowly, confused. She bends forward slightly and kisses his hand.

A shiver racks up his body and he groans slightly at the new sensation. She looks at him, alarmed. “It feels… worse.” Her eyes widen and he waves his hands quickly to soothe her worry. “No, no, I don’t think that’s bad. Everything has felt off since I woke up, like my nerves aren’t responding properly. It feels worse, yeah, but I think that’s a good sign. Thank you.”

She does indeed relax. She grasps his hand yet again and pats it gently, lost in thought. Hawks stares at where she touches him, confused by the contact. “I see. Well, either way that is worrying. We’ll have to have you under close observation. I hope you don’t mind.”

He looks up to meet her eyes when there’s a loaded silence. She quirks on eyebrow at him in question. “Oh.” Oh, she actually wanted an answer, “yeah, yeah of course. Whatever you want, Doc.”

The older woman is in the middle of taking his pulse at each of his limps when Aizawa comes back into the room. Hawks perks up at the sight of the hero.

Aizawa glances at Recovery Girl then looks back to Hawks. “We spoke to Dabi. He said he would cooperate if he was able to speak to you.”

Hawks unconsciously ruffles his feathers at the suggestion of seeing Dabi. “For sure.” He answers simply and goes to stand up. Recovery Girl latches onto his wrist, stopping the motion. He pauses to look at her in surprise.

“You’re not going anywhere; he can come to you.”

Aizawa speaks up, “Well, it may be best to keep Dabi in holding.” Recovery Girl turns to face the underground hero.

“Dabi allowed himself to be apprehended to get Hawks help. He has no quirk at the moment and is skinnier than that cat Hitoshi found. Don’t tell me you can’t manage him right now.” Aizawa gives her a look that has Hawks raising a hand to his mouth, stifling a laugh.

Aizawa shakes his head before turning and leaving the room. “You’re welcome. Now you can have a reunion here.”

Her suggestive look has Hawks unable to keep the laugh in at all. She smiles at the sound, like it was her goal. It probably was, but Hawks couldn’t find it in himself to care.

When Aizawa returns, with additional heroes in tow as well as Dabi, Hawks sits up to meet them.

Dabi shoves past a man with white hair to enter the room before he can. “Oi, don’t move. Idiot.” Hawks complies and pauses where he’s at.

Damn, at what point are they just going to chain him here?

Hawks reaches for the villain before he even fully realizes what he’s doing. Dabi shoots Aizawa a quick glance before moving towards Hawks, allowing the hero to latch onto his wrist.

Well, whatever. They already knew something was going on between the two of them. No point in holding himself back now. Maybe it could even get Dabi brownie points. Show them he is, indeed, human regardless of his villain status.

Also, he just really, really, wanted to hold onto Dabi right now.

“Are you okay?” Hawks asks Dabi, eyebrows furrowed in worry.

Dabi rolls his eyes at him and sits on the edge of the bed by Hawks. “I’m not the one that got speared, Birdbrain.”

“Yeah, but your quirk.” Hawks leaves it off there. The context was enough to figure it out, but not everyone needed to know about the intricacies of Dabi’s quirk.

“I’m used to it. It’s fine.” Well, that was a depressing statement.

“If it hurts Recovery Girl can-“

Dabi cuts him off with a snarl, “I’m not letting any damn hero touch me.” There’s a heavy silence as everyone in the room takes a moment to look at where Hawks is latched onto Dabi. Said villain looks away and scowls at the wall. But he doesn’t move away or offer anything in his defense.

Hawks can’t hold back a grin and his wings shake his feathers out, proud that he’s unique to Dabi. An exception where no one else is. The motion hurts worse than before, but Hawks can only focus on Dabi watching the movement of his feathers.

Dabi clears his throat to get back on track. “Anyway, the walking corpse over there said you were stugglin’ to talk?”

Hawks focuses on where he’s holding onto Dabi. “Yeah. It was weird. Like the words just wouldn’t get come out. And… my head hurts, I guess.”

“Seems like your head always hurts about this stuff, huh.”

Hawks never really thought about it, but he couldn’t deny the statement had truth to it. “I don’t know, they said I get migraines sometimes. Why would they lie?” Why would the Commission lie about his health? It was important to them that he was always in top condition. If there was something wrong, they would handle it.

“Who is they?” Dabi turns his head slightly to glare at Aizawa out the corner of his eye for the interruption. He looks back at Hawks, meets his gaze, and holds eye contact for a long moment.

Finally, Hawks shrugs in permission. It doesn’t matter what they talk about. Dabi already knows everything, it seems, and it’s UA. They’re a hero school. They would understand what the Commission is doing and why.

“The Hero Public Safety Commission. Are you affiliated with them?” Dabi asks, eyes dark. He looks at each of the heroes in the room, searching for a reaction.

Recovery Girl is the one that answers, shaking her head. “Not in any way. They have their claws in everything, but UA has always made it a priority to remain independent.”

Why?

Dabi looks at her than back at Aizawa. “I have no reason to believe that.”

“Yet you brought Hawks here.” Aizawa points out, meeting the villain’s glare with his chin up.

Dabi curls his lip at the hero, “Because I took a risk to save his life, not because I had faith in your disgusting school of propaganda.”

Vlad is the one that interrupts before they could go at it. “Why are you so afraid of telling us?”

Dabi snaps his head to look at the man, growing agitated. “Because the last mistake,” Dabi sneers out the word mistake like it personally offended him, “he made was order some takeout. And they threatened him for it. I can’t imagine what they’d do for this ordeal. Literal torture, maybe?”

Hawks, finally, speaks up.

 But he doesn’t want to.

Why is his mouth moving?

“When I fell asleep at the meeting, I reported it. I have to. I have to tell them when I fuck up so they can correct me.” Aizawa, the ever-stoic hero, drops his head into his scarf at Hawks’ words. His eyes are dark. “They said I needed endurance training. They-“

Hawks cuts off and squeezes his eyes shut at the memory. He’s not supposed to talk about his training. But this is UA. This is a hero school and Hawks needs to say this. He doesn’t know why, he doesn’t want to, but he can’t stop himself. He needs to say it.

“They had me in a- a tank, I guess. The water was high enough that I had to stand on my toes to keep my nose above it. It would rise sometimes. Others, it would… rage, I guess is the word.”

Hawks distantly notes how Dabi’s head is dropped so low his chin is almost touching his chest. His hands are clenched tight into fists. The cuffs on his wrists are blinking red rapidly. “You couldn’t even stand when you got home. You passed out on the floor. The next day you could hardly even walk.”

So? It was endurance training. It was supposed to suck. It was supposed to wear him down.

Aizawa moves to lean against the wall next to the door. He crosses his ankles. “You were trying to save him.” He says to Dabi.

The villain raises his head to meet his gaze. “His file is full of this shit. Worse. And they’ve done it so well he can’t even fucking recognize it for what it is. The only reason I know was because- because a loophole they missed.”

Hawks cannot follow this conversation. Of course his file is full of hard training. What is Dabi expecting from them? To sit Hawks cross legged on a range and tell him to hit targets with his feathers? That’s what he did in the first few weeks, why the Hell would he still be playing games as an adult? He tells them as much.

“Yeah, my trainings hard, but it has to be. I’m the #2 hero, the youngest in the world to be that high. I’ve saved so many people. So, isn’t it right? Aren’t they right?”

Why is asking for their opinion? Of course Aizawa knows it’s necessary

“No!” Dabi snarls at him, and Hawks stares back with wide eyes. The villain grabs his shoulder, dragging his cuffed hand with it. “It’s not! You don’t owe this world goddamn shit-“

“Hawks.” Dabi lets himself be cut off by Aizawa, takes deep breaths to calm himself down. “Do you train your interns like that?” Hawks swivels his head to look at him with wide eyes. The tone isn’t accusatory, just leading. “Do you think I should put my students through the same training?”

Hawks imagines Tokoyami in that tank. Imagines the boy standing in Hawks’ place in his Handler’s office. Hawks feels dread crawl up from his stomach to his throat. “No!”

“But it would make them better heroes, wouldn’t it?”

Wouldn’t it?

Hawks swallows heavily. “You -you should give them a chance to do it on their own.”

Aizawa purses his lips and nods like he’s considering it. “And if they fail, I should torture them?” Hawks looks at him, distraught. He can’t think of anything to say. Can’t think of any defense.

The Commission… did it to make him a good hero. It worked; he is a good hero. So why does thinking about that training happening to these students make him feel so sick?

Wouldn’t the world be better off?

Wouldn’t it?

“Hawks, the outcome doesn’t matter, none of this should have ever happened to you. It’s not worth it. Even if you were a symbol greater than All Might, it still wouldn’t be worth it. You didn’t deserve that. Hawks, I’m sorry hero society has failed you.”

Hawks can’t look away from the man. Eyes wide, scared, and mouth just slightly agape. Horrifyingly, he feels his eyes start to burn. For as long as he can remember, Hawks hasn’t cried. He doesn’t think he’s able to. His eyes turn red and shiny all the same, however.

“I’m sorry hero society has failed you,” Aizawa says again, “but, we have an opportunity here. To make sure this never happens again. Are you willing to help others where we failed to help you?” Aizawa is genuinely asking if Hawks wants to help them with this.

With… exposing the Commission?

“But they… they make heroes.” Hawks responds quietly. His conviction is weak, even to his own ears.

Dabi speaks up for the first time in a while. “They make villains too, I would know. Trust me, Hawks, this is happening. You all can do it legally, or I can do it my own way. With significantly more fire.”

Hawks finally drops his gaze on Aizawa to look at Dabi. The villain has since let go of his shoulder, but Hawks is still locked on to his wrist. Hawks jerks said wrist slightly to get the villain to look at him. Dabi raises an eyebrow in question. “Please don’t threaten villainous things in front of heroes, Hot Stuff.” The attempt at humor is weak, his voice shaky, but Dabi grins at him nonetheless.

Aizawa sighs heavily. “If we fail, I’ll look the other way. Just for this. Just this once.”

Dabi turns to glare at Aizawa, face dropping any joviality. “Oh? You’ll let villainy occur if it benefits your goals? How expected of a hero.”

“And you’ll accept heroics in the name of Hawks. Guess we’re both willing to make exceptions for him.”

Dabi jerks like he’s about to throw himself at Aizawa but thinks better of it and settles for a deadly snarl. “Don’t compare what you’re doing to what I’ve done for him you fucking-“

This time, it’s Hawks who cuts him off with a mumbled, “My head hurts.”

Dabi immediately turns back towards Hawks, frowning. “Get him pain meds or something.” He says without looking away.

“He’s on them. I was expecting him to feel the affects of the quirk regardless, but his head? He shouldn’t be feeling a thing.” Hawks looks at Recovery Girl in shock. He was on pain meds? Yikes. That woman’s quirk was not a joke.

“Does your head feel better than any other time?” Hawks thinks about Dabi’s question for a moment before shaking his head. It doesn’t always hurt the same, and this definitely wasn’t an extreme either way. “So, it’s not a physical thing. Otherwise, the meds would help at least a little.”

“Hawks, did they ever do anything regarding your head?”

Hawks frowns at Aizawa in thought. “No,” he answers after a moment, “but honestly, that kid freaked me out when he was in my head. Like, a lot.”

This time, the cuffs start beeping when Dabi clenches his hands. Hawks looks at them in concern. “You used that fucking quirk on him?” The villain’s voice is strained, like he’s trying to not yell.

“Calm down, Hawks consented to it. It was necessary or we wouldn’t be at this point. I didn’t, however, account for his reaction to it’s use. I’m sorry, Hawks.”

Why do people keep apologizing to him?

Dabi glares at the man. “Fine. Fine, but if you ever fucking do it again, I’ll turn you to ashes.” Aizawa doesn’t react to the threat. “Birdy, just stay here and rest. They’ll get someone who can make sure your head is okay. I can get your file dropped off here.”

“Like hell-“ Vlad’s protest is cut off before he can even get into it. Dabi was ready for it.

“How else do you plan on doing this? That’s what we need. Figure out how you want it done, but the League has it and we’re not dealing with a middleman.”

Hawks speaks up, willing to vouch for the League’s cooperation. UA doesn’t know them beyond the training camp and Kamino ward, but Hawks knows firsthand they’re not impossible to deal with. “It’s not like the League doesn’t know where UA is. Just set up a location within the school grounds to receive it.”

“Very true, but you don’t need to worry about that right now, Hawks. UA will take control here. You just need to focus on healing. It’s time for you to rest.” Hawks looks at Recovery Girl in dismay.

“I just woke up.” To his horror, and apparently everyone else’s amusement, Hawks can’t keep the whine out of his voice.

God, the Commission would flay him for acting like a child in front of others.  

“Resting doesn’t mean sleeping, Birdbrain. Just chill.”

Hawks makes a face at Dabi. “I can start-“

“No. Just chill.” Hawks groans loudly and flops onto his back, turning onto his side so his back is facing Dabi. The movement yanks the villain with him. Dabi grunts in surprise and has to twist to plant his bound hands on the bed to keep himself from completely falling onto Hawks. He nearly gets a face full of feathers in the process.

Dabi narrows his eyes and is about to say something, probably an insult, but Hawks speaks up before he can get a word in. “If you’re locking me up in here, I’m keeping him with me.”

The request sounds like a joke, his tone light, but Hawks’ heart is beating rapidly and he’s chewing on his lip to cool his nerves.

Unsurprisingly, Aizawa speaks up. Although he does sound regretful, Hawks notes. “We can’t leave him in here.”

“Then I’ll go with him.” Dabi frowns at the suggestion that Hawks be brought to a holding cell when he’s recovering from near death.

“He’s a villain.” Vlad says simply. Dabi can’t hold back from rolling his eyes.

“How are you going to try to convince me the Commission is bad but then say the man trying to save me from them is also bad? That’s not helping my head at all. It’s confusing as hell.”

There’s a moment of silence before Dabi lets out a bark of laughter. “Ha! He’s got you there.”

Aizawa, once again, sighs heavily before stepping towards Dabi and grabbing his arms. Hawks jerks in panic but all the man does is separate the cuffs. Each of his wrists still has an inhibitor on it, but he’s no longer bound together. “He can stay but understand that this room will be under heavy observation then. Hawks we’re working on getting you a replacement phone, but if he’s in here then that too will have to be monitored.” He turns to Dabi, “If I have an inkling of a reason to believe you’re going to harm him, you’re going to find your ass chained in a cell next to All For One for the rest of your miserable life before you can even think to beg for a second chance. He trusts you, for some god forsaken reason, and needs that stability right now. That is the literal only reason I’m allowing this. Don’t fuck that up, Dabi.”

Hawks stares at Aizawa with wide eyes, trying to process the threat as Dabi simply glares back at him, unspeaking.

Afterwards, when the staff have filed out of the room with promises to return soon, Hawks glances at Dabi before looking back at the door. “He’s kinda scary.”

Dabi gives him an unimpressed look. “You don’t think he’s scary, you just don’t understand what he wants and that scares you.”

“Don’t psychoanalyze me.”

Chapter Text

It’s not too much later when a knock announces yet another arrival. Dabi faces the door, angling his body in front of Hawks. The gesture is a tad overbearing considering they’re both in the middle of a high security campus crawling with pro heroes. Despite that, the thought of it has Hawks’ stupid bird brain setting off fireworks. He can’t stop himself from curling his left wing so the tip is sprawling over Dabi’s lap.

When the door opens, Hawks has to lower his gaze to spot the short man who he immediately recognizes as the first animal to manifest a quirk. Hawks read about him.

“Hello, esteemed guests!” Dabi makes a disturbed face at the distinction. “I am Principal Nedzu. I wanted to personally welcome you two to UA and ensure you that as long as we all remain civil and work together, this will go smoothly. UA is under no obligation to report either of your locations during this investigation.”

“Uh huh.” Dabi says, looking the man up and down as he approaches them to hand Hawks a phone. When Hawks looks back up from the device in his hand, Nedzu is gone and Dabi is looking around the room in confusion.

“He went through the vent,” Hawks informs him, as if that’s completely normal. “Here.” He holds the phone out to Dabi and the villain takes it slowly.

“Why did you want it?”

 Hawks chuckles quietly and rubs the back of his neck. “Well, I was thinking I needed to contact the Commission and tell them where I was.”

Dabi stares at him, unimpressed. “You know, you are kind of stupid, actually.” Hawks knees the villain in the thigh, ignoring the flash of pain the motion causes.

“God, give that back. I’m going to tell them I’m not reporting in because a rude villain is bullying me.”

Dabi snorts at him before waving the phone slightly in the air. “Yeah, okay. But, really, why do I have it then?”

“Well, because I don’t entirely trust myself not to call them? Also, what else would I need it for. Better to just not hold on.”

Dabi drops the phone onto his own lap where it lands on Hawks’ feathers. “Did you plan to stare at the wall for the entirety of your stay here?”

Hawks takes a second to realize what he’s getting at. “Oh! No, I don’t play games on my phone or anything. I don’t know, don’t really see the appeal.”

Dabi stares at him, “You didn’t even have a TV in your house. Do you have any hobbies? Like, what do you do in your free time?”

Hawks laughs. “Free time ain’t in my contract, Firecracker.”

“Don’t call me that. You telling me you have zero time between the League and hero work?”

Hawks shrugs at him. “Not enough to do anything beyond eating and admiring the view from my apartment. I do have free days every once in a while, but I really just use those to catch up on sleep and do errands. Honestly, Dabi, don’t let this rile you up. It’s not something the Commission has forbidden or whatever. I just don’t like distractions.”

“You- hm.” Dabi cuts himself off, “we’re unpacking that later.”

“What? What’s wrong with that?”

“Birdy, you literally just told me you don’t have any hobbies and when you’re not actively doing hero work you pass time with sleeping and staring out your window.”  

“…So?”

“Oh my god.”

“What!” Hawks laughs out as Dabi falls onto his back and turns his head so he can look Hawks in the eye while he shakes his head at him in disapproval. “Ugh, whatever. You know, I was actually thinking you should contact the Commission.” Dabi frowns at him but gives him a chance to explain. “I check in with them daily. By now they already know something is wrong. It might be our best move for the League to reach out and say you caught on and captured me or something.”

“So they wouldn’t go looking for you everywhere. But, wouldn’t they try to get you back? That could create more issues.”

Hawks shakes his head at him. “No, they wouldn’t. They know nothing about the League’s location, plans, or contacts. They have no leads and I’ve been trained enough to recognize a Code Kalvo.”

“The fuck is that?”

“It’s uh, oh you’re probably not going to like this.” Dabi narrows his eyes at him. “Basically, it means they’re not able to extract me and the information I possess is more harmful than my life is beneficial.”

The inhibitor immediately starts beeping and Hawks cringes at his inevitable anger. “Meaning, deal with torture until it eventually kills you, knowing they cut their losses and abandoned you.”

“Dabs, listen-“

“Keigo, I swear to God if you defend them one more time, I’m going to throw myself out that window and make this situation worse for everyone involved.”

Hawks stares at him with wide eyes. “Why?”

“Why? Because I literally cannot stomach sitting here listening to you defend the motherfuckers that hurt you to make society worse. They’re literally everything I stand against and they made you suffer while doing it. It makes my blood boil worse than my fucking quirk.”

Hawks looks down at where he’s holding Dabi’s wrist. He slides his hand down and laces their fingers together. Dabi lets him, watching. The hero tugs lightly on him until Dabi gets the hint and moves himself closer to Hawks until there’s barely an inch of space between them. Hawks raises his other hand to twist his fingers into the fabric right below Dabi’s sternum.

Aside from some of his training, Hawks has never been this close to another person. He’s never wanted to be. It’s better when people are further away from him. It’s easier to protect himself, easier to telegraph their movements and read their body language. Honestly, he’s never been like this with someone and he doesn’t know what to do, what’s normal.

He doesn’t know what to do, but he knows he wants to hold Dabi close to him. So, he does.

“Stay with me.” Hawks turns slightly, so his face is pressed into the space between Dabi’s shoulder and the pillow beneath them.  

“We already agreed on that.” Dabi matches his quiet tone.

“No, just, stay with me.” Hawks chews his lip as Dabi takes a moment to respond.

“Of course, little bird.” Hawks closes his eyes at the words and allows the room to become silent.

He just…. needed a minute. A minute to rest. To get his bearings about the absolute tornado his life had become in such a short amount of time.

His moment is interrupted, however, when a ridiculous noise startles him out of his reprieve. He glances over to see Dabi holding the phone above him, scrolling through Twitter.

Hawks knows Twitter, he has a Twitter account. Well, the Commission has an account for him and they have him take pictures for it sometimes when he’s flying over the city. “What’s that?” He asks after his eye catches a burst of color moving across the screen.

Dabi glances down at him then back at the phone. “Uh, I don’t know. Just some ad.”  

Hawks accepts the answer and continues to watch him scroll before another bright image catches his attention. “What’s that?”

He immediately feels Dabi jerk as he snorts at him and Hawks cranes his head to frown up at him, cheek smushed into the man’s arm. “It’s a streamer. She’s playing Valorant 2. It’s an old game I doubt you’ve heard of it. Not that I think you’ve heard of anything.” The last part is muttered to himself.

Hawks glowers at him anyway. “Well you’d be wrong; I know about a lot of games.”

“From flying past their ads on billboards?”

“What about you? Dumpster diving outside decrepit Gamestops?” Dabi elbows him in the neck in retaliation and Hawks clicks at him by snapping his canines together.

The sound had them both freezing as Hawks looks at him, shocked by himself. Dabi breaks into a grin and he slowly relaxes. “My medication is supposed to help me control that.”

“Well, good thing it ain’t here.”

Hawks makes a noncommittal sound. “Well, I don’t know if that’s a good thing. Birds don’t really have useful traits.”

“How long have you been on them?” Dabi sets the phone face down on his chest, focusing his attention on Hawks.

Hawks has to take a moment to think before shrugging as best he could in the position he was in. “To be honest, as long as I can remember.”

“So, you’re telling me you don’t even know how you would be without them.”

Hawks purses his lips at him. “No, because I still do still get tendencies, regardless. Stupid tendencies at that.”

Dabi grins again. “Like what? Fighting your reflection?” It was clearly a joke, but the villain loses it when Hawks flushes red and doesn’t respond. Unlike with his Handler, Hawks can recognize there is nothing malicious behind the laugh. Although Dabi is laughing at him, he’s not trying to humiliate him. Hawks takes a moment to thank the years of social training that allowed him to read people as well as he does.

“Please, please, you have to let me see that.”

Hawks rolls his eyes at the still laughing man. “Why is it the first time you say please, it’s for the purpose of bullying me.” Dabi only cackles louder and Hawks resigns himself to once again hiding his face between the villain’s arm and the bedsheets.

Finally, Dabi regains control of himself and there’s a long, peaceful moment of silence. It’s broken by an entirely too loud eruption of bird sounds from the phone.

Hawks wastes no time snatching the phone with lightning speed and turning fully on his stomach, phone pinned between his stomach and the mattress while he fumbles to find the power button. Dabi is still laughing slightly as he tries to worm his hands under Hawks to get the phone.

The contact makes the hero shiver, but he covers it up by batting Dabi back with his wings.

The door opens with them like that, both of them freezing at the loud sigh. “Hawks, dear, please don’t strain yourself.”

“Uh huh.” Hawks mutters, completely muffled by the pillow he’s currently suffocating himself with. Dabi doesn’t remove his hands, only continues to fight for control of the phone Hawks currently has an iron grip on.

Huh, maybe some bird traits have a use.

Hawks strains his neck to look over Dabi’s spiky hair as Recovery Girl drops two takeout boxes off on the side table. “I had some soup picked up from the cafeteria. If there’s any diet adjustments you two need, now is the time to say so.”

Dabi finally removes his hands so he can turn and address the older woman. “Commission had Hawks on some dumbass diet. Dunno what he actually needs but I can tell you right now it’s been lacking.” Hawks thumps his head forward onto the pillow again, overwhelmed by yet another incoming change to his daily routine of more than ten years.

Recovery Girl frowns at that. “Thank you, Dabi. Hawks, we’ll find you a specialist to evaluate you, if that’s okay.”

Hawks doesn’t respond so Dabi speaks up again. “He’ll deal. It needs to happen.”

Recovery Girl actually frowns at the villain for that. “I acknowledge your concern for him, but Hawks doesn’t need us forcing anything on him right now. It’ll happen only when he’s comfortable with it.”

Dabi sits up in a flash, tense. “He’s never going to be comfortable with it after what they did. This is important-“

“I am far more concerned about his state of mind than his body right now. His diet may not be optimal, but he is absolutely healthy enough that no changes absolutely need to happen. We have time to do this right.”

Hawks reaches up and tugs gently on Dabi’s arm to get his attention. “Please don’t argue with the Doctor, Dabs. I trust her.” Dabi looks down at him and slowly untenses, shooting the woman an overly aggressive glare before scooting himself backwards to lean against the headboard.

“Whatever.”

Recovery girl shakes her head at the villain before addressing Hawks again. “Hun, if you have any questions or reservations please speak to me. I’m here to aid you through this time.”

Hawks is quiet for a moment before muttering out a quiet, “okay.”

“Thank you.” Hawks has no idea why she thanks him, but she’s gone before he can ask. He sighs heavily into the pillow.

“Being here, around heroes, just… stresses me out.”

Hawks figure that’s Dabi’s version of saying sorry. He squeezes Dabi’s arm lightly to show he understood.

“S’not a big deal. I get it. I’ve known nothing but the Commission my whole life. This is all overwhelming.”

Dabi reaches over to runs his hand through Hawks’ golden hair. The contact sends a violent shiver straight through his body. There’s no way Dabi didn’t notice, but he says nothing. Just does it over and over and over, until Hawks eyes are shut and he’s relaxed.

The villain’s hand moves to his wings; hovering in hesitation before touching down lightly. Hawks can’t help but stretch them out at the contact. Dabi dips his fingers between the feathers, lightly scratching his nails across the base.

The action pulls a quiet coo from Hawks. Hawks freezes at the sound but Dabi is only encouraged as he adds more pressure. Hawks can’t give his sounds a second thought as his muscles go completely lax. For the first time since he’s woken up, the tension leaves his body and he forgets he was even hit with a quirk.

“God.” He whines quietly.

“God? That’s a new one. I like it.” Dabi has no reservations teasing him even now.

“Shut up and don’t stop doing that ever.”

“Whatever my worshipers desire.” His tone is light, clearly withholding a laugh. “After said worshiper eats something.” Hawks whines loudly into the bed and refuses to budge from his position. Dabi huffs at him. “If you eat now I’ll preen your wings.”

Hawks pushes himself up finally, purposely keeping the phone hidden beneath the pillow. “No one has ever preened me before. What kind of soup?”

Dabi pops one of the lids open and peers into it before passing it to Hawks with a spoon. “Looks like butajiro. I’m guessing.”

Hawks takes it and stirs the contents around. He stabs at a piece of meat and stares at where it hovers above the tub. He glances at Dabi who raises an eyebrow at him. “It probably won’t kill you.” Hawks rolls his eyes at the villain but drops the meat back into the soup. He can sense Dabi’s frown without even looking at him.

Hawks elbows him gently in the side but focuses his attention on collecting some broth. “My stomach’s not feeling up to that right now. I think I’ll stick to the broth. See? I’m not even eating the veggies.”

“Fine, you get one pass. Next time you’re not skipping out on the meat.”

“Hate to break it to you, Hot Stuff, but if I can’t keep it down there’s no point to me eating the meat anyway. I’d rather wait anyway until I can speak to that diet specialist.”

Dabi lets out an aggravated huff. “Why? Of course you need protein.”

Hawks drops his spoon fully and turns to look at Dabi, frustrated. “My diet has been heavily regulated for literal years. Even if there wasn’t a good reason for that specifically, there’s good reason to avoid changing it until a professional can make sure it’s safe.”

Dabi looks away from Hawks to give the wall a death glare. “I just want you to get better.”

Hawks reaches over and grabs his hand, curling their fingers together. Dabi returns the pressure. “Firecracker, you’ve already helped me so much and made this whole thing a shit ton easier. But I need your emotional support, not medical opinion. I know you don’t like heroes, but please try to trust them like I’m trying to? This is hard for me too.”

“Eat your soup.” Dabi doesn’t turn back to him but his hand is warm and Hawks accepts that as a win. He knew Dabi was trying to take care of him, but at this point Hawks was not ready to make any drastic life changes without expert approval.

Dabi, frankly, was not an expert on health. Clearly. Speaking of-

“You gotta eat too. Support me, my emotional support Villain.” Dabi finally turns to fix Hawks with an unappreciative stare but can’t stop his lips from curling when Hawks returns the look with a blinding smile.

“If it’s poisoned, I’m haunting you mercilessly.”

“They literally didn’t even label them for us, how the fuck would they poison you without poisoning me,” Hawks pauses and frowns down at his own soup, “…unless you think they’re poisoning me too?”

“Hawks.”

Chapter Text

When Hawks wakes up, he doesn’t spare a second to warn Dabi before he’s throwing himself off the bed and across the small room before dropping to his knees in the connected bathroom.

“Hawks?” Dabi’s voice is, understandably, alarmed.

Still, Hawks can’t answer him as he hangs over the toilet and lets salvia drop into the water below, swallowing heavily around the thick feeling in his throat. His shaking arms struggle to keep him propped him up, so he drops his elbows onto the toilet seat and prays UA has high sanitary standards.

“Hawks, what’s going on?” Hawks can’t answer him as his stomach muscles lurch. Nothing comes up and salvia continues to collect in his mouth. It only makes the sensation worse. He closes his eyes when a hand rubs the back of his neck gently. It’s cold, and Hawks can only guess Dabi naturally runs cold without his quirk active.

Hawks is, an all honesty, a bit of a germaphobe. It’s not uncommon among heroes who spend so much time with the public. He doesn’t get sick often and doesn’t remember it feeling this miserable when he does.

Usually, even if he does catch the occasional bug, he works through it. Hawks knows how to work through sickness.

He doesn’t think he could work through this.

He can’t hold back his shivers, but the shaking of the entirety of his body covers it up. Dabi still takes notes, however, when he gently runs his fingers across the goosebumps stretching down his arms.

Hawks heaves again and he feels Dabi step away from him and exit the room. The door to the room slams open and Hawks startles when he hears him yell down the hall.

“Hey! I need some fucking help in here!” Hawks hears him step back as a new pair of footsteps comes running down the hall from a distance away. The sounds are entirely too loud, and entirely too much as he groans in pain.

Hawks feels the beginnings of a wicked migraine form behind his left eye, joining the always-there pressure of his headache. The footsteps slow to a walk as they enter the room and beeline straight for the bathroom.

“He woke up sick. It’s definitely withdrawal. They had him on quirk suppressants for years.” Dabi follows the new arrival into the bathroom, footsteps heavier than the person in front of him.

“Years?”

Oh, it’s Midnight. She must have been on watch nearby.

The hero kneels next to him and puts a hand on his neck. She leans forward and nudges his head towards her and searches his eyes.

“More than ten, less than sixteen.”  Hawks watches with lidded eyes as Midnight’s face hardens in tense anger. “Everyday.” Dabi adds, before she can ask. Hawks jerks his head away, back towards the toilet to gag some more, this time spitting up bile. He whines as it burns his throat and his stomach cramps painfully. His entire body feels like the woman’s quirk was back in full force.

Dabi steps around the hero and returns to Hawks’ side. This time he doesn’t hesitate as he brings his hand to Hawks’ back and digs his thumb into the hero’s wings where it meets his back.

Hawks allows his wings to untense and drop, unaware he had even risen them.

Dabi’s presence at his back allows him to lean heavier onto the toilet, quiets his senses that are doing their damnedest to make his head explode. “I’m here, Birdy. I’ve got you. Just focus on this. Don’t force anything.”

Distantly, Hawks acknowledges that it’s incredibly funny that the #2 hero is trusting an S rank villain to watch his back as he also coaches said hero through puking his guts up.

After what feels like hours, Hawks drops his forehead onto his forearm propped up on the toilet seat. Dabi’s hand moves up his back and into the hair at the base of his neck. He scratches lightly, occasionally giving the strands an incredibly gentle tug. After a moment, Hawks grunts at him.

Dabi, somehow, impossibly, manages to decipher that and stands up. He hears him rooting through the cabinet before returning. “Here, mouthwash. Spit that and then let’s go lay down. I don’t know if you heard, but Dom Lady just left. They called in a quirk specialist and she’ll be here in, like, an hour.”

“Her name is Midnight.” He mutters into the skin of his arm.

“I really don’t care, Tweety. Come on. Mouthwash.” Hawks slowly raises his head and shakingly takes the bottle from the villain. He cranes his head back and pours some into his mouth without touching the opening before handing it back.

He swirls the burning liquid until it completely fills his sense and spits into the toilet. He picks himself up while Dabi flushes the toilet. Hawks sends a few feathers to carry the trashcan with him out of the room.

He’s not risking throwing up on UA’s bed. That’s embarrassing and disgusting. He sits down and rolls onto his back, ignoring how the action lacks his usual carefulness and he smashes his newly preened wings into the bed.

Can he go one fucking day without something in his life turning on its ass? Literally one day without a crisis?

Dabi paces the room. Hawks watches him with lidded eyes as the villain glances at him every few seconds as if he was going to spontaneously die.

The footsteps echoing through the room are only bringing his migraine past his eye and turning into a persistent toothache as well. “Please sit down or something.” He groans. Dabi complies, settling on the bed next to Hawks. There’s a moment of blissful silence until he starts tapping his foot and Hawks whips out a feather to hold it down. “Dabs, no noise. Like, none. Zero.”

The villain, finally understanding the issue, gets up and turns the lights to the room off before settling back down. He pulls Hawks’ wings out for him, but the action is so incredibly gentle that Hawks’ can’t stop the almost inaudible cooing noises he makes.

He snatches the villain’s hand and raises it to his neck. Dabi complies and begins messaging the muscle as Hawks turns his head in the opposite direction. The migraine had creep down to his shoulder by now, but Hawks always hated the neck pain the most.

Despite Dabi’s gentle care, Hawks was well and truly pissed by the time the specialist shows up with Recovery Girl and Midnight.

His head has been hurting for weeks, and even more so in the past couple days. He didn’t want to change his diet, he didn’t want to change his medication, he didn’t want to change his hobbies or his house or his job.

Recovery Girl approaches him first and starts to check his eyes, arms, and pulse, while the new arrival sets her bag on the side table and pulls out the chair and settling down.

“Hello, Hawks. My name is Anita. I study the biology of our quirk genes and use that work to assist heroes whose quirks are not as simply understood as most.”

Hawks side-eyes Dabi to see the villain glowering at the woman, seemingly agitated by something she said. The woman, however, pays him no mind. “Would you please tell me about your quirk and the medication you took? So I can put together my own analysis.”

Hawks takes a deep breath and thinks for a moment, piecing together how he wants to word this. “I was born with the wings and eye marks, proportionate to my body. I do exhibit bird characteristics but I’m not entirely sure when those came in. I started training my connection with my feathers when I was seven, but I do know I had used the ability prior. That whole period of my life is pretty blurry. I was given quirk suppressants for the first time before I was ten. Maybe eight? Nine? I’ve taken them every day.”

The woman writes quickly onto a piece of paper. “Any other aspects of your quirk?”

Hawks purses his lips at her. “It’s kind of a lot of stuff.”

She looks up at him, takes in his apprehension. “I understand your reluctance for talking about this, but this information will stay only on this paper which will stay in this room. I just need it to organize any information to do my job to the best of my ability.”

The possible information leak wasn’t particularly what he cared about, but whatever. “Ah, I know my brain is different because of it. My feathers are kind of like nerve endings and can take in a lot of information and relay to my brain, up to a radius of about 3 miles. I’ve been told I analyze that information faster than what’s average. Some of my physical senses are also more sensitive. My eyesight and hearing particularly.” Hawks looks down and flexes his hands. “I can also carry well above my own weight, but that’s not something raptors can do so I’m not particularly sure why.”

Anita hums at that, tapping her pen onto the paper rapidly. “Raptors also don’t process information at high rates, despite their reaction speed. If I had to make an assumption right now, I would say your human traits and quirk traits are colliding here. And instead of meeting in the middle, like is common in mutation quirks, they seem to be combining to create a new peak all together.”

“The fuck does that mean?” Dabi speaks up for the first time.

“It means Hawks is quite a special case, genetically. Unfortunately, that does also complicate the situation quite a bit. Quirk suppressants are synthesized for the norm. Since Hawks doesn’t meet that norm, and he took them for so long, and for the entire duration of his teenage years where we see quirks develop at a high rate, we could begin to see adverse effects.”

Dabi looks at Hawks, brows furrowed, then back at the woman. Hawks had to silently agree with him, that really didn’t sound good.

“At worse, your body is going to react very, very badly to this change, and we’ll be in the dark on how to treat this. At best, you’ll just go through that growth late while your body recovers from withdrawal. Unfortunately, there’s also the possibility that your quirk has been stunted completely.” She looks at Recovery Girl who is taking her own notes.

Hawks pushes himself up, doing his best to ignore the stabbing pain behind his eye. Dabi slowly draws his hand back to himself. “Why would that be unfortunate?”

Everyone in the room pauses and turns to look back at him. “My quirk did grow with me, a least to some extent, or I’d have small wings. The Commission kept up with my medical checkups and they wanted me to be a good hero, regardless of their methods, why would they purposefully suppress anything that was useful?”

Dabi frowns at him and Anita mirrors the image, albeit with less aggressiveness. “Look, I’m healthy. I’m already the #2 hero. I don’t want to go through any quirk changes that are only going to fuck me up. I should just stay on the medication, and then all of this is a non-issue.”

Anita opens his mouth, eyes ablaze, but Dabi cuts her off. “You said yourself they’ve been less effective. Just stop taking them!”

Hawks turns to him, frustration raising in his chest. “Hawks, although poorly said, Dabi has a point. If your body was going to adjust to these drugs, it would have done it a long, long time ago. The fact that it’s happening now means your body is intentionally rejecting them.” Recovery Girl speaks up before he can, politely, tell Dabi to not bring up how the League was spying on him again. “We need to let it happen and I can prescribe something to prevent a cold turkey reaction.”

Hawks curls his fingers into the bed sheets. “I am not replacing my pills with more fucking meds! I don’t need to be off them.”

Dabi throws his hands up. “Yes, you do! She just said that!”

Hawks stands up suddenly and stalks across the room before turning around. “Not being on them is also making me sick, so what does it matter? I’m one the best heroes in Japan. My quirk is fine.”

Dabi stands up too, the inhibitors loudly clanking at the motion. “You shouldn’t base your fucking health and life on being a hero! You should accept your natural body!”

Hawks can’t hold back a humorless laugh at that. “Really? You’re going to tell me that?”

Dabi narrows his eyes at the hero and tilts his head to the side slightly. “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”

“You, you, telling me to accept my quirk as if you wouldn’t change yours in a second!”

Dabi’s eyebrows raise in incredulousness. “Your quirk doesn’t fucking burn you alive! It’s not bad!”

Hawks throws his hand out towards him in exasperation, palm splayed upwards. “You don’t know that! No one knows that, they just said so! But the Commission did suppress it for a reason!”

“I know that you’re the #2 hero while I’m a fucking villain!”

Hawks scoffs and snaps his head away for a second before looking back at Dabi, eyebrows turning his eyes into harsh angles. “You’re not a villain because if your goddamn quirk. You’re a villain because you chose to be.”

Hawks eyes widen and he takes a step back, heel slamming into the dresser and ruining his balance as Dabi takes a threatening step towards him, eyes narrowed and burning a harsh blue as his hands curl tightly into fists at his side, staples staining to hold the skin taught.

Hawks can’t even think to move, to react, just stares at him with wide, scared eyes. The villain doesn’t get very far before a light pink gas fills the air around him and his eyes flutter and he drops to the ground.

Hawks still can’t think, just stands there and watches as another hero comes in and picks Dabi’s unconscious form up. Midnight and Anita leave the room, following behind her. Recovery Girl is speaking to him but he can’t bring himself to listen as she leads him back towards the bed.

Her hand patting his knee finally prompts a reaction and he looks at her finally.

For some reason, she looks very, very sad.

“I’m sorry, Dear. I know today must have been crazy enough. You didn’t deserve that, even if he was upset. Please rest for now and when you’re feeling better we can talk about this.” She straightens up. “And when he’s calmed down, you two can talk about what just happened.”

Hawks’ small nod seems to be enough for her and she leaves the room quietly, shutting the door behind her.

Hawks turns his head back towards his own lap, brings his hands together as he digs his thumb into his palm and rubs it aggressively.

Is.

Is it the Commission?

Hawks didn’t have the best memory of his childhood, but some memories have become more clear ever since he saw their names. He vividly remembers his father kicking him down one night. Remembers the tall man yelling at him. Remembers his furious golden eyes, so similar to Hawks’ own.

Is it the Commission?

Do people have to treat him like that?

His family, The Commission, Dabi. Hawks was the common denominator. And if that was the only way he listened, the only way he learned, how could he blame any of them?

Dabi cared about him. He knew that. So if Dabi has to do it, doesn’t that mean the Commission had no other choice as well? Dabi was as opposite of the Commission as one could get.

The deal was they would take care of his mother and in return Hawks would train with them. So, if that was the only way to train him, how could he mad at them? At any of them?

If Hawks doesn’t like it, then he needs to do better. The Commission asked him to be good, that’s all they ever truly asked from him.

Hawks slowly turns his head to stare at where the phone is still hidden under the pillow. He swallows, ears ringing for some reason.

There were other people in the training program, Hawks knew that. If they were out there and they never spoke about what the Commission did, then it had to be training specific to Hawks. Because he couldn’t be good.

He should call them. Hawks stands up, intent on reaching for the phone.

The door opens.

Hawks sits down.

He sees Aizawa step inside with Midnight on his tail. Aizawa twitches slightly when Hawks meets his eyes. “Sorry, I knocked but I didn’t hear anything. Wanted to check in.”

Did he knock? Huh, he must have missed it.

He says nothing, just stares at the man. Aizawa clears his throat before stepping further inside. “Hawks, I heard Dabi got aggressive with you. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have allowed this. I expected too much of him in this situation.”

What? No, Dabi wasn’t at fault here. How else was he supposed to react?

Hawks shakes his head at them. “I made him angry, it’s to be expected.”

Midnight frowns deeply at him. “Hawks, it doesn’t matter what you said, he should not have-“

“Midnight, please,” Hawks cuts her off, “I understand the sentiment, but I meant he’s a villain and not entirely stable. I knew that. I should have diffused the situation when I saw he was becoming aggravated.”

“Hawks, just because his reaction could be expected, doesn’t mean you have to accept how it hurt you. I know it hurt you, I’m sorry.”

Hawks frowns up at her. “How can I be upset with him if that’s how he’s expected to react?”

Aizawa sighs heavily at him. “Hawks, I hate to be the one to tell you this, but you are an abuse victim.” Hawks can’t withhold a flinch at that. “No matter how upset someone is, that doesn’t ever give them the right to take it on the people around them. Ever. I know you don’t quite understand that yet, but I hope we can help you with healing here.” Aizawa takes a moment to collect his thoughts before looking back at Hawks with eyes sad enough that Hawks’ feels his stomach sink.

“I took a risk with this situation, and I regret it. If we entertain this before you’re ready, it’s only going to worsen your understanding on healthy relationships with the people around you.”

Hawks shoulders drop and he fights to keep his face neutral.

They’re going to take Dabi from you.

“However, I am not blind to the fact that Dabi’s presence here is helping you a lot. It’s going to take some time but I do believe we can find a middle here.”

Hawks perks up infinitesimally, hopeful. He could deal with that. He could. The hope drops when Shinsou steps into the room, cringing heavily and holding a phone where texts are clearly lighting it up. He no doubt heard the last part of the conversation.

“I’m sorry, Hawks.”

No. no no no no.

“But I guess Dabi made that decision for you.” The boy looks up at Aizawa. “Dabi’s gone.”

Hawks can’t say anything that happened in the next hour or three registered in his head. When he comes back into his head, he realizes he’s been staring out the window. Aizawa is still in the room, seemingly asleep in the chair by the table. Hawks looks away from him and back out the window.

He wanted Dabi.

But Dabi left. Dabi was going to hurt him.

Who cares? Everybody hurts you.

Chapter Text

Hawks can hear when Aizawa wakes up, the change of his breathing enough of a tell. He doesn’t spare the hero a glance, just keeps his gaze on the window. The view wasn’t as nice as his apartment.

It’s been too long since he’s been up in the air.

“He said he would stay. With me.” Hawks voice is quiet, shakes slightly on the last words.

He hears Aizawa take a deep breath, “I’m sorry, Hawks.”

His parents left long ago, and now Dabi has left too. He needs to go to the Commission. He needs to fix this so they won’t leave him behind too.

He just needs to make UA understand that as well.

But UA is convinced the Commission is bad. Dabi is too.

God, he doesn’t understand.

Dabi was just here.

Dabi was, not even a day ago, holding him, laughing with him, promising to protect him.

Then he tries to attack him and leaves. What is he supposed to make of that? What is he supposed to think?

“I want to go home.” Hawks borderline whispers, turning to look at Aizawa. The older hero meets his gaze with an apprehensive look.

“Hawks, we….” Aizawa takes another deep breath, like he’s preparing himself, “We’ve been looking through your file. During this investigation there was a general consensus that it would be better if you stayed here.”

Hawks stares at him, expressionless. Eyes unblinking. Aizawa shifts minutely, a clear tell of how much he did not want to be having this conversation. “Everyone knows you’re not at fault here but given some of your past assignments and connection to the League; it’s protocol. Just to be sure. I’m sorry, Hawks.”

Hawks laughs so suddenly it startles both of them. Aizawa watches him, clearly taken aback.

What? It’s funny.

It’s funny.

“Hawks-“ Hawks cuts him off before he can even start.

“You’re sorry, Mom was sorry, I’m positive Dabi’s sorry. I bet the Commission is sorry too!” Hawks can feel the pressure building behind his eyes, knows his eyes are shining with unfallen tears. He’s still laughing. “I bet they’re real fucking sorry they picked me!”

Hawks’ mouth is stretched in a mockery of a smile, like he’s told the funniest joke no one else can understand. Aizawa doesn’t respond, can’t think of anything to say at all. “God, this really is my worst fuck-up yet. All just because I couldn’t do what they asked. Just because I couldn’t be good. If I was just good.” His voice trails off at the end, and his manic expression drops, like he’s seeing something far away. “What if I just didn’t fall asleep that day?”

Aizawa, finally, speaks. “Hawks, please, we just want to sort this out the right way.”

Hawks throws his hands up to stop him, grinning brightly like they’re having a simple conversation over lunch. “Oh, I believe you. I do! But I’m just wondering, am I supposed to accept this hurt? Or is the one of those situations where I get to deny it?”

Aizawa, again, has no response to that and Hawks can’t hold in a sick laugh. “I’m really asking. I don’t know. I literally don’t know anything. How am I supposed to react to this?”

Aizawa looks so sad it makes Hawks want to scream. “I can’t tell you how to react, Hawks. I can’t tell you how to feel.”

Hawks drops all mirth once again. He sinks into himself, voice so small he sounds more like a scared boy than a pro hero. “Why not?”

“Who we are dictates how we respond to different situations, Hawks.”

“Who am I?”

“I don’t know. But here you have the chance to find out.”

Hawks closes his eyes, focuses on the feeling of his nail lightly scratching his palm. He would need to trim them soon. “Okay. Okay, let my quirk grow. Bring down the Commission, or something. Learn how to be human. Learn who I am. Easy. Easiest mission yet.”

Aizawa gives him a half smile. “It will be your easiest mission yet because you have UA at your back. I know it’s going to be hard, but I want you to rely on us, Hawks. To the best of your ability.” The man stands up and Hawks watches him. “But, Hawks, your comment- are you still unsure about the Commission?”

Yes. Very much.

“It’s just… confusing. All of this is so goddamn confusing. One second, I’m sure they’re bad, then the next I feel like I can’t breathe without them. I can’t keep my head together. I’ve never felt like this.” He drops his hands and finally meets his eyes. “Right now, I feel like I can’t even trust left from right. I can’t make a decision about the Commission. All I know is that when I was with them, everything was less confusing, and I don’t like being confused.”

“That’s completely sensible, Hawks.”

Is it? It feels like he’s rambling bullshit.

“Your life is beginning to veer off from something that’s been drilled into your head your entire life. Half of you is trying to move on, the other half is desperately clinging to what you know. But the fact that you’re willing to tell me this is a very good sign. I hope you’ll trust me to help you.”

Hawks looks at him, at the overworked underground hero who fell asleep in a chair just to make sure Hawks wasn’t alone when he came back into his head. At the man who allowed Dabi to stay with him but was brutally honest about the situation. At the man who blamed himself for how Hawks was hurt when Dabi left.

Hawks doesn’t know if Aizawa is doing what’s best for him, but he knows Aizawa wants to get him to a point where he can make that decision for himself. So, he doesn’t need his parents, the Commission, Dabi, or even UA, telling him what’s good for him.

“I do trust you.” He says finally.

There. That’s the first decision he’s made for himself and himself alone.

Aizawa gives him a soft, barely noticeable smile before he stands up. “For the record, you can leave the building. Just please stay on UA property.”

His second decision is recognizing he’s not ready for that. “I don’t think I can trust myself to do that, right now.”

Aizawa purses his lips at him for a moment. “You feel up to moving?” Hawks takes a moment to think about his shaking muscles before nodding slowly. “Well, how about we go visit the kids? They’ve been on my ass nonstop about you. But I have to be honest, I don’t really know what Shinsou’s told them.”

“Don’t torment him.” Hawks can’t help but grin at Aizawa’s greeting as he opens the door to the dorm. The activity on the open floor pauses as everyone turns to get a look at their visitor. The room goes completely silent as they all stare at Hawks with wide eyes.

“Hey, I heard you all really helped me out there. Thanks for the assist!” He flashes his signature grin at them, and the silence only lasts as long as it takes for them to process the greeting before the room erupts into shouts.

“Hawks! Are you okay?”

“Hawks, what happened!”

“Why did Dabi have you?”

“Did Dabi do it?”

“Why did Aizawa need Shinsou?”

“Why didn’t you go to a hospital, are you still hurt?”

Hawks takes in the questions and already has thirteen acceptable answers formulated before Aizawa speaks up for him. “I just said, don’t torment him. Now is not the time for all of that. Yes, Dabi was helping him and this was the best choice.” Hawks is surprised Aizawa bothers to defend the villain in front of his students. “Hawks is going to be staying at UA for a while. He may also participate in our training here.”

Hawks turns to him, raising his eyebrows. “I’m what now?”

Aizawa looks back at him, clam. “I think it’ll be a good idea if Anita’s theory is true. Plus, we can show you the right way heroes train.”

Hawks hesitates, opens his mouth and then closes it when Tokoyami buts in. “Hawks is great mentor!” The defensive tone against his own teacher brings a genuine, small grin to Hawks face.

Aizawa, however, is not as amused and gives Tokoyami a long-suffering stare. “Yes, Tokoyami, I know. I came to that conclusion myself when I evaluated you after your short internship. This is about Hawks, specifically.”

“What the fuck does that mean? Why does a pro hero need help training?” The kid Hawks recognizes as Bakugo from the sports festival drawls, seemingly annoyed by his lack of understanding of the situation.

Aizawa looks to Hawks and quirks an eyebrow at him, putting the situation in his hands. Hawks looks at the kids around him for a moment.

The third decision he makes for himself is to stop building his entire life on manipulation, lies, and secrets.

“It’s been recently brought to my attention that my hero training was… unethical, I suppose. Your teacher here is giving me a new perspective. And my quirk may be going through some changes soon and they would like to monitor my health during that process.” Aizawa, once again, looks proud of Hawks and the younger hero has to avert his gaze.

“Oh cool, he’s like a new student!” A red-haired kid shouts, pumping a fist.

“Student? He’s way older than us, Kirishima!”

“Nah, man, he’s closer to our age than to Aizawa’s.”

Hawks can’t help but laugh quietly at their argument. He honestly hadn’t thought of it that way; but it was true, he supposed. The #2 hero and he’s closer in age to these first years than their teacher.

Hawks spreads his wings slightly to keep his balance when his legs start shaking more. This is the longest he’s been up since he was hit. Tokoyami is stepping forward before he can steel himself to ignore the feeling and lifting Hawks’ arm up over his shoulder to support his weight.

Hawks would really rather Tokoyami didn’t telegraph his weakness like this but doesn’t entertain the thought of shrugging his intern off. He was supposed to start being honest with people anyway. Admitting when you’re not well is honesty, he’s pretty sure.

Tokoyami herds him towards the living room area and sets him down on the couch. The boy sits in a chair next to him. Everyone else gives them distance and Hawks can only assume Aizawa is responsible for that. The students around them slowly go back to what hey were doing, but also very clearly do their best to stay within earshot.

Nosy teenagers.

“What do you mean unethical?”

Hawks sighs and gives him a tired smile. “Honestly, kid, I don’t want you to worry about it. I’m here now. Just let your teachers here handle it.”

Tokoyami looks disappointed at the lack of information but nods once, anyway.

“But it’s been a while since I’ve seen you. I always wanted to visit but work had been keeping me busy literally every minute.” He sighs in overexaggerated pity for himself. “So, tell me about school, and Tahiko! How is he doing in Europe?” Hawks sees Aizawa disappear up the stairs out of the corner of his eye, speaking on the phone.

Tokoyami gives him a look to inform him of the fact that he’s not being sneaky. Regardless, the boy starts talking and Hawks doesn’t even make it to how English class is going before he drifts off.

Chapter Text

It’s dark outside when Hawks wakes up and he takes a moment to mourn for his ruined, formerly impeccable sleep schedule. He pushes himself up on shaking arms and the blankets slides off his shoulders to pool in his lap.

He glances at the black screen of the TV and wonders if he turned it on if there would be anything about him. He’s been gone for a while now. At the very least, the citizens of his town must be wondering where he is. Hawks is never off of patrol more than one day a week.

The Commission has probably carefully released a story about where he was. In no universe would they admit to him missing.

Hawks wonders if they’re worried if the League of Villains figured out the truth and hurt him.

Worried probably isn’t the right word.

Maybe it was. Maybe the President was worried about him. She was there his whole life. She was there for every birthday.

Maybe she wanted to know he was okay.

Maybe he should stop thinking about the Commission altogether.

His gives his ruffled feathers a long-suffering look. The thought of straightening them himself brings the phantom sensation of cold fingers winding through the quills. Hawks had been maintaining his own wings his entire life, but after Dabi doing it once, he wasn’t willing to go back. Once he saw Dabi again he was making the villain do it again.

After he smacked him upside the head, of course.

Preening his feathers was a long, repetitive process he had no patience for on a good day when his arms didn’t feel like they were going to fall off. Hawks only straightens out two feathers before frowning at his wings and turning his attention to the vibrations coming from the kitchen.

Present Mic looks to be heating something up on the stove. Hawks is sure it normally smells good, but the gentle crackling of oil makes his stomach churn uncomfortably.

Regardless, he pushes himself up and makes his way to the kitchen. Present Mic greets him with a smile entirely too bright for 4 AM. “Morning, Hawks! You hungry?” He shakes his head but cranes his head to see what’s in the pan anyway. Hizashi hands him a glass of water and he takes is gratefully.

The Commission had Hawks drinking a shit ton of water daily, and he can’t say that was something he minded. His mouth has been dry as hell since he’s been here. If he’s going to stay, he may need to invest in a water bottle.

“I’m still feeling nauseous.” He explains to the hero, hoping to assure him he’s not just skipping on meals that he’s not used to. “And my head hurts. I can just take vitamins though, it’ll be fine.”

Hizashi purses his lips but keeps his eyes on the eggs sizzling in front of him. “You take vitamins a lot?”

Hawks rubs at the condensation on his glass, aware he’s about to enter yet another conversation about his problematic life. He nods.

“Like what?”

Honestly, Hawks stopped paying attention a long time ago about what they gave him. Probably not his smartest move ever. “Uhh, B12, calcium, omega-3 fatty acids, and I think Iodine? There are others, too.” Hizashi flexes his jaw a bit, clearly trying to think of a response.

“Why not just adjust your diet?” His voice is carefully kept level.

Hawks sniffs lightly, looks down at the cup in his hand. “My diet has always been very strict. Plants and whole grains. If it’s only found elsewhere and I need it in my system, I take a supplement.”

“And that was the Commission’s plan? Not yours?”

“Yeah, but I mean, it’s not weird for heroes to have a strict diet. You should see what Endeavor eats.” Hawks laughs, lightly, trying to lighten the mood.

“I have. He adds protein supplements into his diet and avoids fried food and candy. It’s not really the same thing Hawks.”

“Dabi shit on my diet too. Is everything in my life fucked up?” He meant it as a joke, but Hizashi just turns to give him a pained ‘yeah’ look. “Oh. Okay, well. I’m pretty sure they just did it because I need to stay light. It’s not that big a deal.”

Hizashi looks like he’s going to say something else but drops it in favor of handing Hawks a mug of coffee. Hawks perks up at the sight of it, more than willing to risk upsetting his stomach for it. He welcomes himself to the fridge and searches through their milk collection for something non-dairy and pulls out oat milk. “I’m not stealing someone’s milk, am I?”

The other hero shrugs. “I don’t know, we typically leave their kitchen alone. But they’ll get over it, I’m sure.”

Hawks grins before pouring the milk in. “Oh, so you’re just in here to babysit me?”

“Why else would I be up at 4:30 in the morning?”

“Class?” Hizashi raises his eyebrows at him. “What?”

“They’re kids. Class doesn’t start until 8:45.”  

Hawks frowns in confusion. “That’s so late. I literally get up before that on my free days.” Hizashi gives him another look and Hawks groans. “Oh, not again. I might actually have to start writing this stuff down.”

Hizashi hums at him. “You know, that’s not a bad idea. Write down your routine and what you think is normal, and the compare to what other people do. It might help you understand even the minor things the Commission has you doing for no reason other than control.”

“They don’t do it to control me, they do it because it’s good for me.”

The older hero cuts him off before he can even start. “I distinctly remember you telling us a story about how they tortured you with borderline drowning. Was that good for you?”

Hawks is silent for a moment. “It was to help me stay awake when I’m tired.”

“And, do you find it easier to stay awake? Or are you just terrified to sleep?” Hawks swirls the coffee in his mug before giving a small shrug. He, honestly, can’t answer that. “You know what I would have done?” Hawks looks up at him, prompting him to continue. “Given my students more time to relax and sleep, so they were never in a situation where they were so exhausted they passed out around highly dangerous villains.”

Hawks chews his lip for a moment before deciding to steer the conversation in a different direction. Something he actually wanted to talk about. “They’re not bad people. The League, I mean.”

“Well, I’m not going to say either way. They did hurt my students and my friends. I can admit, however, that Dabi is certainly different than I imagined him. So, it’s not far-fetched to say I don’t have a good understanding of the others, either.”

Hawks puts his mug down and meets Hizashi’s gaze, determined. “I know they’ve done bad things, but none of it is something they can’t come back from. Shigaraki, Dabi, Toga, Spinner; they’re all so young. I want to help them. They deserve that, at the bare minimum. They deserve the help I’m getting, too. I really believe that.”

Hizashi smiles at him. “You know what? Despite what you’ve said about the Commission, I don’t think they made you a hero. They just saw your protentional and wanted to control that. You were always going to be a hero, Hawks.”

Hawks stares at him with wide eyes, absorbing the words.  

The Commission always told him his behaviors weren’t that of a hero. That he was too loud, too irresponsible, too lazy. They said he was unprofessional. They told him heroes weren’t so hellbent on helping villains, and that it was weird he was. Suspicious.

And here Present Mic was, telling him he was born to be a hero just because he wanted to help the League of Villains.

This distinction, at least, was easy. Despite what his Handler spit at him, Hawks always believed a hero should help everyone who needs it. Other heroes, villains, citizens, vigilantes, a cat stuck in a tree, anyone. That was what a hero was for.

That’s who Hawks wanted to be. A hero anyone could trust.

“Dabi I can’t stand your pouting, for fucks sake. It’s pathetic. Just go back.”

Dabi glares at Shigaraki form where he’s currently not pouting across the room. “I can’t.”

Toga groans from where she’s stretched out across Spinner and Twice’s lap. “If they didn’t kill you the first time, they probably won’t now. Just have Kurogiri plop you back in where he got you out and go find your mans.”

“He’s not my man.” Dabi practically spits the words out and crosses his arms when Shigaraki turns his head to stare at him with furrowed brows.

“Did something happen between you two?”

“Kind of.” Dabi mutters, looking down at his scuffed boots. That gets everyone’s attention and they all stop what they’re doing the give the arsonist their full attention.

“Oh my god, what did you do?”

Dabi scowls at Spinner. “Why do you just assume I did it?” There was a moment of silence where no one says anything. Dabi sighs. “Okay, yeah.” Spinner snort at him and he glares at the mutant. “It doesn’t matter, I can’t go back.”

Toga rolls her eyes. “You’re being so dramatic. What, did you hit him or something?”

She clearly meant it as a joke, but Dabi can’t keep it to himself. “Almost.”

There’s a long moment of silence before Toga lets out a quiet, “Oh.”

“The fuck? I thought you cared about him a lot or something.”

Dabi throws his hands up at Shigaraki’s confusion. “I do! That’s why I can’t go back. He gets me angry one time and I can’t fucking keep myself together, even for him, and the fucking heroes there needed to knock me out. To protect him, from me.” Dabi pauses for a moment, turning his head to look at the wall instead of the people watching him. “He looked so scared and confused. He never expected me to react like that, wasn’t ready for it. He trusted me and I almost hurt him.” Dabi swallows heavily, drops his voice. “I can’t go back.”

Shigaraki drops his controller onto the table with an aggressive clash. “And what did he say about you leaving?” Dabi just looks at him, startled. He doesn’t have an answer. “Nothing, right? Because I bet you didn’t fucking speak to him about it. We started this with Hawks with the intent of freeing him from those who dictate his life for him. You’re not going to do it too. You thought he was confused then? Imagine what he’s thinking now after you attempt to jump him and then disappear.”

Shigaraki turns away harshly from the gaping arsonist. “So, stop moping and at least go fucking call him and apologize. Christ.”

Dabi doesn’t wait for someone else to offer their opinion before he’s striding out of the room, slamming the door behind him. Shigaraki wasn’t wrong, really, but they don’t get it.

Dabi didn’t just get angry at Hawks, that wasn’t it. It was so much more than that.

Just hours before that, Hawks had fallen asleep while Dabi was preening his wings. He said no one had ever done that for him before. Dabi wanted to be Hawks’ first everything.

Hawks had held his hand, rubbed his thumb along the staples in his wrist, had pressed up against him and asked him to stay by his side. Dabi didn’t want to be anywhere but Hawks’ side.

Dabi didn’t want to feel anything but those impossibly soft red feathers. He didn’t want to see anything but his tan skin, golden eyes, blonde hair, and those barely visible freckles decorating the curves of his cheekbones. He didn’t want to hear anything but Hawks’ laugh, his content coos, his gentle snoring. He didn’t want to smell anything but his cologne that slowly faded into a more natural scent the longer they spent in that room. He wanted to know what Hawks’ lips tasted like, his cheek, his neck. He wanted more.  

In that room, Dabi had forgotten Endeavor had even existed.

And then in that moment of anger, when Hawks once again reminded him of the #1 hero, when Dabi could feel himself burning all over again, when Hawks stared at him just like how Rei stared at Enji; Dabi remembered who he was.

Dab remembered why he existed.

Hawks had made him forget, and he couldn’t allow that. Dabi can never let go of what happened in the Todoroki Estate.

Dabi could never be what Hawks’ needed, could never stay at his side when Endeavor still existed.

Dabi has never wanted anything like he wanted Hawks. But Hawks didn’t need Dabi, he needed Touya.

And if Touya wanted to exist, Enji had to burn.

Chapter Text

Hawks crosses his arms and rubs at his biceps to chase away the chill. It really wasn’t that cold out, but he was a bird. Birds are not supposed to be anywhere cold. Ever.

Aizawa side eyes him, watching his movements. “You know, we can get you a jacket.”

Hawks shakes his head without looking at the man. “Nah, I hate baggy clothing more than I hate the cold.”

The dark-haired man turns to look at Hawks fully, raising an eyebrow. Hawks shrugs, already knowing the question. “Something about looking bigger and not getting cold at high altitudes. Which, yeah, it does get very cold up there when you’re moving as fast as I do. Every other time it just gets in the way. Who wants loose clothing when their thing is speed? Oh, Tsu found Mineta.”

Aizawa turns back to the field just in time to see Tsu dodge the other student’s quirk and wrap her tongue around him, trapping his arms to his side. The boy wiggles in her grasp. Hawks shudders, imaging using his tongue in such a way.

It was bad enough when people decided his feathers weren’t part of his body and could therefore be groped whenever they felt the urge.

After Tsu keeps her opponent pinned down for 30 seconds, she releases him and the two of them move off the field. Sero and Mina walk on next. “Interesting matchup. His quirk is made for this exercise, but Mina’s almost completely nullifies it. Meanwhile, her quirk doesn’t give a capture advantage. They’re both going to have to get creative.”

Aizawa nods. “Sero is strong, but Mina really excels in hand-to-hand combat.”

“But she’s going to have to divide her attention by dealing with the tape too. He’s probably going to go for overwhelming her while she tries to get close. He can swing with his tape too, though, right?” Hawks pauses for a moment. “This is going to end in a draw.”

Sure enough, exactly ten minutes later, time is called and they both slow to a stop and high five each other and grin.

“Why are they so happy? Neither won.”

The older hero sits on his question for a moment before answering. “Have you ever trained with your peers, Hawks?”

Hawks shakes his head. “Nah. There were other kids in the program. I know they trained with each other, but I didn’t. I was always monitored by a group of adults.”

“I don’t suppose they ever called draws?” He doesn’t sound like he’s expecting much from the answer.

“No.” Hawks is quiet, thinking about his training. “They’re happy because it was a draw, right? They’re happy because they’re learning and were able to help each other get better.”

Aizawa nods his head at him slightly. “You learn quick. Just because one didn’t win doesn’t mean the training was a failure. Not everything is a test.”

Hawks watches the next two go onto the, already high fiving each other. Sero and Mina are greeted with smiles and excited hand movements. “I would have liked to train this way, I think. It’s hard for me, sometimes, to talk to the people around me without analyzing them and their role in my life.”

Aizawa nods towards the field. “You want to step in?”

Hawks lets out a huff of laughter, glancing down at the ground and then back towards the brawling students. “I think this stuff is a little too late for me. I help my sidekicks and interns through experience. Walking through situations, how they can analyze their most efficient role in a right, general advice. My quirk isn’t suited for training others.”

“What do you mean by that?”

Hawk smiles, but there’s really nothing pleasant about it. “I’ve trained for speed and efficiency. I come onto a scene, find a strength, pick a weakness, and take them out of the fight before they even know which way I’m coming from. If there’s a strong threat, I take the threat out of the game before it can become of use. How can I adjust that to your students? They’re not threats I want to take out.”

Hawks looks back at Aizawa to see the teacher making a pensive face, before meeting Hawks’ gaze and it drops into an unamused look. “Okay, okay. I give. How much of that was the truth?”

Hawks throws his head back and cackles. “I thought you said you can tell when anyone’s lying?”

The older man glowers at him, but his eyes are filled with mirth. “I usually can.”

Hawks calms himself, shoves his hands in his pockets. “I believe you. But here’s the thing; there are too many people in Japan with honesty quirks. Almost all of them can be tricked with that same method. Honest reasons, honest emotions, fake conclusions. I was trained for speed, I was trained to take my enemies out as fast as possible, that doesn’t mean I can’t adapt. But I made the lie a question, and then added a true statement. Pouted a little. It’s like a game. Let them make their own truth that fits my lie.”

Aizawa stares at him with raised eyebrows. “That’s quite a complicated skill.”

Hawks shrugs and sticks his hands in his pockets. “The Commission had a role for me in their mind from the very beginning. Even they knew a child’s body had limits. In between physical training, I did a lot of work with sociology.” Hawks kicks lightly at the metal railing in front of him. “So… do you want me to go torture your students?”

Now that, pulls a genuine grin from the stoic man.

Hawks steps up onto the rail and kicks himself over it, expanding his wings out to slow his descent and touch down onto the dirt lightly. “Hey,” he gathers everyone’s attention, “Anyone wanna spar?”

There’s a heavy pause before the kids are all throwing their hands up, crowding him. Tokoyami is the only one who doesn’t volunteer himself, already aware of what’s coming.

After a quick glance of the group, he gestures for Bakugo to come forward. “You’re the winner of the sports festival, right? Come at me with all you got, blondie.”

“Who the hell are you calling blondie with that rat’s nest?”

Hawks raises his hands up and pats his hair with his gloves, feigning a confused look. “Rat’s nest? Aw man, I was really going for bird’s nest.” Tokoyami pinches his nose at the horrible pun while, frankly, too many students giggle at it. Hawks drops his hands and shrugs at the kid. “Anyway, why don’t you show me how you’ve improved?”

Bakugo grins at him, borderline feral, before spreading both his hands into a clawed grip and launching himself at the hero, opening with a rather impressive explosion. Hawks takes in the radius of the explosion and the time it took for him to build it up.

He waves at the kid with an easy-going grin as he spins around to search for him.

“You can use your explosions to propel yourself, right? You should do that more. Not everything is about power.”

“I already know that!” Bakugo shouts at him, launching himself into the air after Hawks. He waits longer this time before tucking his wings and dropping onto the ground. This time, Bakugo is much faster and is already shooting straight towards Hawks.

Hawks waits until the kid is almost on top of him before sending two feathers to yank him backwards and pin him to a nearby wall through his shirt. Bakugo yells in a fit of rage before exploding the wall he’s stuck against. Hawks uses his feathers to throw the resulting rubble directly in his path.

Bakugo, once again, knocks the obstacle out of his way with more explosions, but Hawks is already in the air and too far for his quirk to be a threat. “Quit playing with me!”

Hawks drops his joking demeanor and tilts his head at the student. “What, do you want me to hold you down with my feathers until the match is called, or do you want the experience? How are you going to brag about being the future #1, but can’t even make me break a sweat? Step it up, Sparky.”

Hawks’ eyes darken and he smirks as the kid’s face sets into a determined line. No longer grinning, Bakugo launches at him once again. As he’s spinning out of the way and diving back towards the rubble, Hawks takes note of the smaller explosions.

He’s storing it.

Hawks finally lands on the ground in the midst of the rubble and continuously sends out his feathers until every rock is speeding around the open area as a pseudo-hurricane. Bakugo stops, looking around the scene with a snarl, clearly thinking of the best plan here. Even if he clears a path, the area would be filled in before he could get through. He’d have to blow away the entire obstacle.

So, he has a clear intention for that stored nitroglycerin, he won’t use it just yet. Interesting, Bakugo.

Bakugo meets his gaze through the rock storm and Hawks quirks an eyebrow at him, hands in his pockets.

Hawks can’t prevent his smirk when the kid glances up and sends himself up above the storm. The pro hero cranes his head to watch Bakugo as he poises himself over Hawks’ position and aims a blast straight down towards him, following it up with a smaller blast to propel him straight down.

Hawks drops the rubble and recalls his feathers, ready to bolt. His plan is interrupted when, instead of aiming straight for him, the kid creates a large explosion directly behind him. Then, with the use of his stores, creates two more explosions on Hawks’ left and right simultaneously.

Oh?

The kid comes at from an upwards angle, blocking both the front and top areas. His draws his hand back, aiming an explosion straight for Hawks.

However, Hawks is doing a 180 and sending himself straight through a blast before he even fully recognizes what he’s doing. He startles at the dark red surrounding him while his brain tries to catch up with his actions. Clearing the blast, Hawks’ wings open up to show the world far below him. Bakugo is staring up at him as the explosions fade around the damaged battlefield.

Did I… go through that explosion? How?

Hawks, glances back at his wings and strains himself to recreate the action. He drops altitude out of shock as every feather on his wings harden, creating a metal-esque look.

Before now, Hawks had no unique control of feathers still attached to him. Yet here he was, a hundred feet in the air after having practically created a shield with his wings and using them to travel through an explosion.

Hawks turns his attention back to Bakugo. The student is glowering up at him. “I’m never going to pin you down.” He mutters, before looking away to glare at the ground instead. He flexes his hands in and out of fists, clearly upset.

“Oh, don’t be ridiculous.” He scoffs at him. Bakugo snaps his gaze back to Hawks. “Did you see that move I just pulled?” The kid nods slowly, confused. “Yeah, that’s new. So, congrats. Your plan forced the current #2 hero into a quirk development. That’s wild.”

He sends Bakugo a grin, but the boy just crosses his arms and looks away again. “Whatever, you stood still while I got to that point anyway.” Despite his annoyed tone and dismissal, Hawks can see the tension drop out of his shoulders.

Hawks turns and speeds back towards Aizawa, who is waiting for him. He signals for the kids to continue with the exercise and Hawks watches while the classmates greet Bakugo with smiles and excited shouting. He yells something at them, probably for them to shut up, but accepts Kirishima’s energetic shoulder punch.

Their teacher turns towards Hawks and he follows suit. “Thank you for talking to Bakugo.”

Hawks shrugs at him. “He’s really, really talented, albeit has some serious anger issues. Maybe IED? As well as inferiority issues, clearly.”

Aizawa’s lips curl up slightly into a small smile. “Not many people understand him well, so it’s good he got this experience with you. And, well, it looks like you benefited as well?”

In response, Hawks spreads his wings out and repeats the shield move. He shifts his wings back and forth and watches as the sunlight hits different angles of the darker red color. It was nowhere as easy to pull as his singular detached feathers, but that’s only to be expected. He’s trained with his individual feathers his entire life. This is new, and he would need to work on it.

Depending on how strong they are, this is a huge addition to his fighting style. To not always rely on his speed, but also straight out block an attack? He wonders if the Commission would like this new aspect of his quirk. He doubts they meant to block stuff like this when they gave him his medication to suppress his bird traits.

“How do you feel?” Aizawa is clearly referencing Hawks’ earlier reluctance to go through any changes. 

Hawks turns his attention to Aizawa, only to get distracted once again as the feathers don’t drop their hardened state once he removes his focus from them. Like he has to expend effort to harden his feathers, he has to will them to go soft again as well.

“It’s, uh, cool actually. My quirk never really changed before. Even before the Commission picked me up, I had the same abilities as I did half an hour ago.”

“So, not as bad as you thought?”

Hawks nods slowly. “I think, I was just scared of more things changing. If there was one thing in this world I knew, it was my quirk.” He glances back at the students still on the training field before looking back at Aizawa. “Uh-“

The teacher already knows what he’s going to ask. “You’re not their teacher Hawks, you don’t have a responsibility to them. Go take some time for yourself.”

Hawks offers him a small smile in return before turning and shooting off the platform, over the field, and out of the training area. He creates a harsher angle with his wings and leans into the motion, laughing as the wind splits across his face.

The feeling of the air streaming over his tight compression shirt and down his bare arms, through his ungloved fingers, makes the experience completely new.

As if he’s flying for the first time.

Hawks tucks his wings in suddenly and drops into a nosedive. When he gets closer to the trees, he hardens his wings and spreads them out fully and lets the force of the wind yank him back. The motion still pulls uncomfortably at his back muscles, but his wings are able to take the force without damage.

He wills his feathers to soften once again and heads back down, weaving through the trees. Hawks turns feet-first and hits a large branch. It creeks under his weight, but holds.

He looks around himself to take in the forest. It was approaching winter, so not too many animals were out. Darkened leaves were beginning to drop. He spots a few squirrels racing around, disappearing under bushes and up trees. The leaves rustle behind them, so incredibly loud that Hawks is momentarily confused at the origin of the sound.

Everything seemed brighter, louder, sharper. Like he’s put on glasses.

Kicking off the branch, he flaps hard until he’s hovering over the trees. He glances back towards the direction he came from and turns so he’s more perpendicular to the center of the school’s campus. Now was not the time to get spotted by the Commission and ruin UA’s plans.

However this all ends, whatever he chooses, Hawks knows what he wants to do right now is fly; and he can’t do that under their gaze.

The fourth decision Hawks makes for himself is that flying free is a breathtaking thing.

His moment of carefreeness doesn’t last forever, however, when he spots a woman waving wildly at him from the ground. She’s grinning widely and bouncing on her toes with ever wave. The action is strangely childish for her appearance.

“Hawksy!” The woman shrieks up at him. The sound barely carries across the distance, but Hawks catches it and takes a deep breath before diving down towards her.

He slows to a stop quickly and touches down gently, one foot following the other. “Toga, what in the Hell are you doing here?”

She bounces towards him and he let’s her grasp onto his arm in an odd hug. “I missed you! Everyone was going crazy after you ran off and then Dabi went to meet you and didn’t return.” Hawks cringes at that, imaging their thought process. “And then UA- UA! Can you believe that? Reached out to us and asked for your file. So we figure that out, and they didn’t even let me see the school, can you believe that? That’s so rude. And then Dabi came back and wouldn’t tell us anything except that you made him angry and he had to leave.”

Hawks blinks rapidly at that, trying to stay calm at the mention of the arsonist. “Did he… did he say anything else?”

The young girl shrugs, mouth pursed in thought. “Well, he said the heroes attacked him and that he just needs to focus on Endeavor now.”

Hawks can’t manage any response aside from a weak, “Oh.”

Seeming to sense his mood, Toga releases his arm and steps back slightly, cocking her head at him. “Are you mad at Dabi?”

Hawks is quiet while he thinks about her question. Was he? Actually? He thinks about all the times he’s been mad in the past. In all honesty, it wasn’t a lot. Anger was usually an emotion so strongly based on others. Hawks was never particularity mad at the villains he fought. But, he remembers being mad at his Handler that night before all of this. It’s not the feeling he has now. “No, Toga, I’m not mad at him. I’m just… hurt, honestly.”

Hawks is shocked out of his pensiveness when Toga snatches his wrist and tugs it towards her, meeting his eyes with her narrowed yellow ones. “Dabi is always doing dumb shit. I can stab him for you if you want, make him apologize.”

He lets out a startled laugh. “Oh God, Toga, please don’t do that. But thank you. The offer honestly means a lot.” She beams at him in return.

He, honestly, did not expect her to be willing to go after Dabi for him. “Hey, I’m sorry, but I kinda need a minute to clear my head. And you… probably shouldn’t be here. I won’t tell anyone, and if you promise to not bother any of the students, I won’t ask how either, okay?”

She drops his hand with a sigh. “Okay, I promise. But we’ll see you soon, right? How long are you going to be here?”

“To be honest, Toga, I have no idea. UA hasn’t gone public with their case yet. When they do, my actions depend on what the Commission does.”

She huffs but pulls out her phone and starts texting; probably Kurogiri for a warp. “I thought he couldn’t warp from outside school ground?”

In responds, she gives him a vaguely creepy smirk. “And I thought you weren’t going to ask?” When shadows begin swirling next to them, she lunges forward and traps him in a hug. “You looked happy up there, Hawks. I want you to always smile like that. Not the way you used to, alright?”

He slowly wraps his arms around her in return, squeezing his eyes shut. “Alright, Himiko, I’ll do my best. Stay safe.” She tightens her hug for a second before stepping back and disappearing through the portal with a wave. Hawks watches as it shuts and continues to stare once the portal is long gone.

Finally, he shoots back into the air without any warning. The grass where he was standing blows flat with the force of the wind. Unlike before, he goes high. Into the clouds until the world below him is nothing but white, and precipitation is dripping off his face. A mocking depiction of tears he can’t produce.

Hawks meant what he said. He wasn’t mad at Dabi.

Because Dabi wasn’t going to hurt him.

At the time, Hawks was too shocked by his aggression to notice; notice that the inhibitors on Dabi’s wrist never once went off, never even flashed red. Dabi was angry at him, wanted him to shut up, and the only way he knew how to do that was through intimidation. But not once did Dabi actually try to use his quirk against him.

He doesn’t, however, know if the villain himself had even realized that fact.

And if Hawks wanted to be honest with himself, knowing that only makes the situation worse.

Initially, he had thought that Dabi didn’t care about him. But rather, he cared about having proof of the Commission’s corruption. Getting his file, getting Hawks to agree to work with UA was just a way to expose that corruption. Now that Hawks was in someone else’s hands, he could move on to his next mission.

Knowing what he does now, Hawks also knows that wasn’t the case. Hawks can’t lie to himself anymore, he won’t. Dabi cared about. Dabi wanted to save him, wanted to hold him, wanted him to get better.

Yet he still left.

Dabi cared about Hawks, but left him at UA to go after Endeavor.

Touya cared about Keigo, but left him at the Commission to go after Enji.

Hawks was sick and tired of being hurt. He was tired of living for others, wanting nothing but their praise and approval, only for those same people to shove him to side as they set their sights past him.

Everything Dabi wanted to save him from, everything Dabi wanted him to heal from, he’ll let it all happen again if it means taking down Endeavor.

Hawks wants to know why. He wants to know why Endeavor’s downfall was worth this. He wants to know why nothing in the world means more to Dabi than his revenge.

Hawks was going to find out.

Chapter Text

Hawks returns to the dorms as it’s getting dark out. He had great vision during the day, sure, but his night vision was abysmal and he was not about to break a limb flying into a building like an idiot.

The visor the Commission provided with adjusted his vision during the night, but he had stopped putting on his full hero costume a few days ago.

He pushes the door open with his shoulder, exhausted. The small number of students milling around the common room greet him brightly and he waves in response. They probably wanted to talk about today as it was his first time observing their training, but there was only one person he really wanted to talk to.

His eyes lock onto the youngest Todoroki. The kid was already looking at him, face blank. Shoto was always watching Hawks, and Hawks knew why, and so he did his damn best to avoid the kid.

This time, however, was different. Keeping eye contact, Hawks jerks his head towards the door he just came through. Without pause, Todoroki stands up and heads straight towards him.

Hawks ignores the stares and quietly whispered questions as he exits the building, Todoroki on his heels.

They walk a good distance away from the building before the kid finally speaks up. “Where are we going?”

Hawks finally reaches the bench at the edge of the woods and turns to sit on it sideways, allowing his wings to dangle over the armrest. “Here. Do you always follow adult men to random locations at night?”

Todoroki sits down on the other end of the bench, angled towards him. “I trust the number 2 hero.”

Hawks raises an eyebrow at him. “Do you?”

The kid kicks at the dirt. “Well, all the teachers here like you, the League likes you, even though you’re a hero, you were nice to Bakugo, and you’re nothing like Endeavor. So yeah, I do.”

He takes the mention of Endeavor for the opening it is. “Yeah, you don’t like Endeavor, huh? Wouldn’t even use your fire until your match with Deku during the sports festival.” The kid looks back at him, nods slightly. “Mind telling me what that’s about?”

“Why do you care?”

“I guess the reason I care is extremely related to the reason you’ve been staring at me since I got here. Endeavor has always been someone I looked up to. I’m beginning to fear that admiration is severely misplaced.”

Todoroki rubs his hands together, a faint trail of steam raising from them. “He’s a good hero.” He says simply.

“But maybe not a good Dad?”

“He’s trying to do better. And he is, I guess.”

Hawks sighs loudly, steeling himself. “Listen kid, if I’ve learned anything over the last few weeks, it’s that if you feel the need to defend someone before you even begin explaining what they do, then it probably isn’t right.”

Todoroki nods at that but doesn’t continue. “Are you in danger?” That gets his attention and the kid looks up at with wide eyes. After a moment, he shakes his head.

“He’s been different since Kamino. Had a life realization, I guess. He’s trying to make things better. I’m not really interested in it.”

Hawks doesn’t like the implications of his statements. “So, he used to hurt your family?”

Todoroki shrugs. “Physically? Only me and Mom when she tried to intervene. Natsou and Fuyumi never had the blessing of his attention.”

“And Touya?” The kid freezes slightly at that. “What, secret I’m not supposed to know about?”

“We’re not allowed to talk about him, ever. It’s a boundary none of us cross.”

“Well, Endeavor ain’t here.”

Todoroki closes his eyes and sighs heavily. “I was very young when he… died. My siblings would know more.”

“Todoroki, I’m going to be honest with you. The League of Villains has Endeavor’s file. Dabi told me himself that he fully plans on releasing the information in it. And trust me, the Commission knows everything about what heroes do. They’re the ones that cover this stuff up.”

The student is quiet for a long time. “Why is Dabi so obsessed with Endeavor?”

Todoroki finally looks up at Hawks and he does nothing but quirk an eyebrow in return.

Why do you think?

“Dabi hurt my friends. Bakugo still has nightmares. He taunted me, back at the training camp.” Hawks didn’t know Shoto had actually interacted with Dabi before. “I don’t… want it to be him.”

Hawks, actually, could relate to that. “You sometimes wish Touya would stay dead, right? Would make things easier for sure.” The kid looks at him with wide eyes. “I knew Touya when I was younger. I thought he had died too. Along the way I forgot a lot about him, but I do remember I was able to come to terms with his death. I wanted to be a hero for him, too.” Hawks sighs heavily. “I figured out who Dabi was a few weeks ago, and I did my damn best not to think about it. Because it hurt. I thought Touya died. Actually, he just left me behind at the Commission. Yet I like Dabi, too. I don’t want to connect them, I don’t want to connect their actions.”

Todoroki grins slightly, returning his eyes to the ground. “Touya left us behind too.”

“Yeah. But, are you happy he’s trying to expose Endeavor?”

Todoroki shakes his head, not hesitating in his answer for a second. “I would if he was doing it for us. He’s not. Dabi is doing this for his own revenge. I hate my old man, but what Dabi is going for is only going to hurt all of us. Including himself.”

“I’m sorry.” The offering is weak, and Shoto just shrugs at it.

They’re silent for a long, long time. Hawks is busy studying the stars that shine through the night sky when the kid speaks up again. “You love Dabi, don’t you? All the teachers seemed convinced.”

Hawks does his best not to sink through the bench at the thought of the UA heroes gossiping about him and Dabi. “I don’t have a good grasp on love in general, Shoto. What I do know is that I’m happy when he’s with me, more at peace than I can ever remember being.”

“I’m glad that he can be that for you. I would like to know my oldest brother, and I want you to be happy with him.”

Hawks smiles at the kid, careful not to force the action. “Well, it’s a good thing I’ve always vouched for villain rehabilitation. I’ll get your bro back, alright? And then we can both terrorize him for leaving us. I’m thinking about dying all his shirts pink.”

When Todoroki laughs at the thought, Hawks stands up and the kid follows him back to the dorm. It’s late, and he makes a mental note to tell Aizawa to go easy on his student tomorrow. While Shoto goes straight upstairs, Hawks makes a detour to the kitchen. He hadn’t eaten since before training and his stomach was attacking him.

He opens the fridge and peruses the other’s leftovers. Hawks never learned to cook, and the students never minded when he grabbed food from them. They were all good kids. Maybe also a little overbearing, given the copious amounts of raw meat on the shelves. Far more than even twenty students would need.

There’s no doubt Aizawa let his diet ‘issues’ slip to them. Hawks hadn’t touched raw meat since the Commission picked him up. He’s not about to start now. Even the specialists said it’s not completely necessary for him to be healthy. So, if he doesn’t want to eat bloody, slimy, and chewy raw chicken, he’s not going to.

Hawks’ diet has changed enough anyway. He eats cooked meat at least three times a week now. A lot more carbs, too. Those two additions alone had caused enough of a difference in his energy that even he noticed in only two weeks.

It seems every change he makes has him doubting the Commission more.

Why did they suppress his quirk if he would only get stronger?

Why did they limit his diet when carbs and protein make him feel better?

Why did they limit his relationships with others?

Why did he never fly free before?

Why did they hide his name?

Hawks did want to go back. He wanted to talk to them. To her. Maybe they didn’t know any of this would make him feel better?

He also knows he has to wait. Now was not the time to do something irrational and ruin what UA is building up.

If the Commission was right, if they were innocent, then the public would decide that. Hawks just had to be patient.

A chill racking through his body snaps him back into his head and he stares into the fridge he’s had open entirely too long. He snatches a bag of slices of mackerel and takes it upstairs with him. Hawks doesn’t like eating his room, but he’s not about to sit in the kitchen in the middle of the night like a creep.

He was tired as hell anyway.

Hawks shoves the fish into his mouth in a very non-civilized way, but he’s too busy being annoyed at the way he’s dragging his feathers across the floor to be mad at himself for his unprofessionalism.

So? Who you got to look pretty for?

Hawks pouts childishly at the cold bed before rummaging through his burrowed clothes for something comfortable to sleep in.

When he gets Dabi back, he’s not giving the man a minute of rest. Dabi would give him a taste of cuddling with someone else then disappear during the coldest months of the year.

What a villain.

After changing into sweatpants and a way, way, too large sweatshirt, Hawks falls face first onto the bed and lets his wings flop over the sides. He's out before the feathers on his back even settle.

“Hawks, this is ridiculous. Get up.”

Hawks sobs into the cold concrete, curling up further into himself. If he doesn’t move, if he keeps his eyes squeezed shut, none of this was happening. None of these people were watching him.

He shrieks once again as electricity courses through his body and makes his muscles seize and convulse.

“You know how this exercise works. Get up. Move. It will only get worse.”

Hawks turns onto his stomach and pushes himself onto his hands and knees. Another jolt, smaller this time, has him fighting to stay in this position. Blood drops onto the floor below him, leaking from his bitten lip.

Get up, get up, get up, getupgetup

He lurches onto his feet and fights to keep his balance. He’s careful not to touch the walls.

On shaking, nearly numb legs, he steps forward. One after the other. But soon, it’s not enough. Another jolt goes through him. The sharp canines only makes his lip bleed more.

“Faster, Hawks. You have to go faster.”

With an agonized yell, Hawks breaks into a run. Faster, faster, faster.

He can’t feel his legs, but he’s grateful. It’s easier this way. His lungs burn like fire but he keeps going. It’s mental, it’s always mental. If he can feel the ground beneath him, can feel the wind on his hair, can feel the pain in his body, then he can keep moving.

He lurches to a stop in front of a passage, no different from the rest. Yet, his instincts shriek at him to stop. He turns to look at the other options, chest heaving. He can’t stop. He can’t take too long. He has to be fast.

His feathers itch the back of his brain.

Electricity

That path is dangerous.

He turns and runs through another passage. He’s met with no pain. It was the right choice. There’s no shock. He was fast enough.

“Good, Hawks. Keep going.”

Hawks let’s out another adrenaline-fueled yell as he pushes himself to

be

faster

Hawks gasps heavily into the pillow when he wakes up. Sunlight streams through the open window and he squints his eyes, looking away. He pushes himself up onto his knees slowly.

It was the most vivid dream of his past he’s ever had. He hardly even wants to call it a dream.

A lot of his past was lost to him. They told Hawks that when a human goes through something traumatic, the brain will often forget it. They also told Hawks that something unnatural was blocking it. It had taken them over a week of careful planning and consolation to be willing to attempt to counter whatever was done.

The process was only delayed again when they learned Hawks was absolutely terrified to have anyone in his head, enough so that he almost bit a chunk out of his arm while they thought he was only covering his face with his arm for comfort.

Aizawa had been very upset with him. Said that when he didn’t want them to do something he had to say something about it. Had to speak up for himself, not just accept it. At the time, Hawks really didn’t understand why he looked so guilty.

Yeah, Hawks didn’t want anyone in his head, but it had to be done. He could push through his own discomfort if it was something that was necessary. Like, who wants to get their teeth pulled? People still go to the dentist.

He said as much to the Aizawa, but was only confused when the doctors still in the room looked like they were going to throw up themselves.

Or maybe they were reacting to the blood still covering his teeth and jaw.

But now, Hawks thinks he was starting to understand. That training was common when he was younger. It was effective, for sure. It taught him many things. To fight with limbs that felt dead, to push when he couldn’t breathe, to memorize patterns, to fun faster, to be smarter, to use all his sense, to utilize his instincts. It taught that when he failed, he received admonishments and pain. When he succeeded, he received praise and a relatively pain free session.

It taught him that she knew what was best, what he needed to do.

That training was effective. It made him tough, smart, fast, and reactive.

Hawks hated it. It was scary, it hurt, it always got harder no matter how well he did the time before. The paths got longer, the options expanded, the warning shocks became less of a warning. They stopped allowing any kind of hesitation.  

No matter what he did, no matter the praises they gave, the standards got harder and the pain increased.

Because how well Hawks did meant nothing; the Commission would never accept it. They would always raise the bar until it was impossible for him to even graze, and then they would look down at him in contempt, spitting insults as he fought with everything he had just to hear that praise once again.

Hawks can’t lie to himself anymore.

All the Commission really taught him was to kill himself for approval he could never earn.

The fifth decision Hawks makes is that he wants to be proud of himself, for no one but himself.

Chapter Text

Hawks’ day was going pretty well, honestly. He had intended to train with the kids today but had gotten distracted before he even got there. Distracted by the wind blowing his hair around. So, instead, he spent the day in the sky blasting music through his headphones. Actual headphones, provided by the support course themselves. The sound quality was pretty damn nice.

Hawks thought he understood freedom. But this freedom, flying for hours without destination while listening to random Spotify playlists, was something else entirely.

His day stopped being so peaceful, however, when he finally came down to scavenge in the student’s kitchen like the freeloader he was, only to see multiple heroes speed walking across campus to the same location.

It was the same building he stayed in during his initial recovery here.

Of course, crime didn’t all collectively decide to take a break while Hawks was ‘missing’. In fact, villain activity had picked up quite a bit. It wasn’t something Hawks wanted to think about. There’s not much he could do in this situation. He had to be patient.

Regardless, in the time Hawks had been at UA, he had not seen a response reaction like this from the staff here. Meaning, something big was happening.

Also meaning, this was more than petty criminals in his district taking advantage. This was either a natural disaster or an actual villain attack.

Either way, Hawks could not stand by while people suffer. He never could.

“Hawks!” Midnight exclaims when he slams into the ground next to her.

“What’s up?” He asks without preamble.

“Oh, you noticed everyone freaking out, huh?” He doesn’t answer, just watches her hesitant hand movements. Watches her eyes dart to the building she had just left before looking at him. Or, more accurately, the space between his eyes. “It’s an attack, heroes have already responded. You know how UA is, we just like to be overly cautious.”

Hawks tracks the bead of sweat making it’s way down her temple, catching on the edge of her mask. “It’s them, isn’t it? Where?”

“Hawks-“

“Please, Midnight. This isn’t just about Dabi, it’s all of them. I have to be there. They helped me.” He can’t stop his voice from cracking at the end and cringes at how pathetic he sounds to even his own ears.

Midnight takes a deep breath. “If Shota asks, it wasn’t me. Otahu district, Northern side. Endeavor is there but at the moment it’s unclear who initiated contact. Please Hawks, be careful. They may be good people to you, but they’re villains because they have desires they value over any person’s peace. Don’t forget that.”

Hawks doesn’t acknowledge that, just turns on his heel and shoots into the sky with enough force to make the other hero stumble.

He understood what she was trying to say but had to disagree. Hawks knew villains. They created his job. Hawks knew villains who were stealing to afford their drug addiction. He knew people who were addicted to drugs because they were denied support after taking addictive painkillers for months.

 Hawks knew villains were stealing to afford to put food on the table for their family.

Hawks knew villains who laughed when they caused others pain. He also knew villains who lost their minds after being persecuted for dangerous quirks they were never taught to control.

Hawks knew villains who were terrified of the gangs they ran with. He also knew they were terrified of going to the police for help.

Hawks knew villains like All For One. Those who wanted power so badly they would bring the entirety of the world to its knees if it meant becoming stronger.

Hawks knew villains like Twice. Those who would do anything, sacrifice anything, to keep the family they found safe and happy.

A few days ago, one of Tokoyami’s classmates had told Hawks that it was amazing he was so kind after everything he went through. She had said it was crazy that the #2 hero had a villain’s backstory.

Hawks knew villains that were hurt so badly by the world that they wanted everyone else to know that pain too.

Hawks knew villains who wanted to drag everyone down with them, so it would be a little less lonely at the bottom.

Hawks knew that he didn’t want to live in a world where villains couldn’t be saved too.

The scene of the altercation wasn’t hard to spot. The front door had been blown in, leaving the walls black with scorch marks.

Endeavor or Dabi, Hawks wasn’t sure. Regardless, he shoots inside before anyone surrounding the property had a chance to spot him.

The halls are dark, only lit by the jagged lighting poking through dirty windows. It’s quiet even for his ears and his skin crawls as he steps quietly over the trash littering the ground.

His feathers find pick up a fight within minutes and he doesn’t waste another second before taking off down the halls. Flying inside was always difficult, but his reaction time has increased a considerable amount, as well as his agility. At this point it was impossible to determine if the cause was the diet change, increased sleep, environment, or lack of suppressants. Really, Hawks didn’t give a shit.

 He was never as fast as he wanted to be. Maybe he was like the Commission in that sense. Hawks was never going to be satisfied with himself.

In the time it took for him to get there, he had heard enough to know that the villain present was Shigaraki. He didn’t recognize who the other presence was; meaning, Endeavor wasn’t here. Neither was Dabi.

Hawks bursts into the room just in time to knock Shigaraki out of the way of a bullet. “Hawks!” The villain grunts out as he’s messily knocked into the wall. Hawks ignores him, faces the person holding the gun.

Hawks narrows his eyes, curling his hands and doing everything within his power to keep his feathers from bristling into a threat display.

Neikan cocks his head to the side at Hawks as he slowly lowers his handgun. “Oh, Hawks. Where have you been?” The man doesn’t sound shocked to see him, just tired. Like this situation was yet another pebble that found it’s way into his shoe.

Hawks latches another feather into Shigaraki’s shirt and hears him sputter, already knowing Hawks’ goal. “Don’t you dare send me away, Hawks I swear to god I will disintegrate your stupid wings off-“ Hawks doesn’t wait for the rest of his threat before sending him far, far away.

He had to get him away from this room, away from Neikan. Even if it put him closer to other responders on the scene.

Neikan doesn’t react, just raises an eyebrow at Hawks like he’s still waiting for an answer. Hawks lets his eyes relax, dropping his shoulders and wings so they’re limp. He drops his chin slightly, submissive.

“Well?”

Hawks swallows heavily. “There heroes found my file.” He licks his lips, wetting them slightly. His mouth felt incredibly dry, but there was nothing he could do about that now. “They said I shouldn’t leave.”

Neikan snorts quietly, like Hawks said something funny. “And you listened to them? Over us?”

Hawks cringes, withdrawing into himself. “No! No, I- they wouldn’t let me leave. They wanted me to testify in court, but I kept refusing. They won’t drop it, no matter what I say.”

Neikan nods, pursing his lips. “Right, you couldn’t get away. But somehow you could escape to come help the League of Villains? You can thank that freak for this, he already revealed that the League knew exactly where you were. Didn’t believe me for a second. I thought we had taught you, by now, to not lie to us. Didn’t we, Hawks?”

“I didn’t lie.”

His handler pauses at that. “No?” Hawks shakes his head. “What heroes, Hawks?”

Hawks gives him a small shrug. “What does it matter, you did nothing wrong, right?” For the first time, Neikan doesn’t have an answer for him. The man just narrows his eyes dangerously. “Sir, I just want you to know, either way they’re hellbent on seeing this through. Regardless of what happens here.”

Neikan acknowledges that for what it was, a plea for honesty. His lies to Hawks didn’t matter because Hawks wasn’t the one controlling this situation.

“We took care of you the best we could, do you not understand that? We wanted you to be a great hero, and you were.” The older man inclines his head towards Hawks and Hawks meets his eyes, searching.

Does he mean that?

Did they believe Hawks was a great hero?

“Everything we did, Hawks, we did it for the purpose of making you better. Do you think we wanted to take the actions we were forced to with you? Did we not reward you when you did well? It’s not on us that you repeatedly fell short of standards we always knew you could meet.”

Didn’t they? Wasn’t she kind when he did well? But everyone fails, too. They shouldn’t have expected him to be perfect. They shouldn’t have hurt him when he wasn’t.

“You-“ Hawks pauses, collects his thoughts. “They said your punishments were too much.”

Neikan jerks as if Hawks said something offensive, incredulous. “Punishments? Hawks, we never punished you.” The hero frowns at him, confused, heart pounding rapidly in his ear. “Punishments are useless, pointless, cruel. We corrected you.” The man pauses, sighs like he had to explain something to a child. “Hawks, when you fell asleep a lot of people could have been hurt. What if the League of Villains had been planning to kill a UA student, and you missed it? It was irresponsible and dangerous. We had to make sure that never happened again, even if it hurt us to do so. Do you think a slap on the wrist would have instilled that lesson in you?”

Hawks has no answer for that. He can’t, he can’t... would it have? Hawks had never dozed in any meeting after that, League or not. Had the correction not worked? And if Hawks didn’t fall asleep in the first place, wouldn’t that correction have never happened? How can he- what if someone had been hurt?

Killed?

He should have already known that, why didn’t he consider that? Why was he only focused on what would happen to him after his report and not what he missed?

Hawks vaguely registers that his chest is heaving, pulling in dusty air in his panic. Neikan holsters the gun onto his belt. “My diet-“

Neikan cuts him off before he can even get into the question. “Hawks, please, eating raw meat is not healthy or safe. Why do you think mutants tend to become villains? It makes them violent. We wanted to save you from that. Please tell me they didn’t make you eat that?”

His handler looks at him with pleading eyes, eyebrows furrowed in concern. Hawks meets his gaze. The ringing in his ears makes him want to shake his head like a dog.

He didn’t. He never did. “No. No, I didn’t.”

The man calms slightly, looks at Hawks like he still has hope for him. “Good, Hawks. I know these heroes are trying to do the right thing, but they don’t understand you. They didn’t raise you like we did. Come with me, and we can fix all of this.”

Come with me. 

Neikan takes a step towards him.

Hawks squeezes his eyes shut, closes his fists so tightly that his untrimmed talons bite into his palms. Blood begins to run down his fingers, finding a path through the lines in his hands.

“No!” The ringing of the world around him stops completely.

Hawks can hear Neikan’s halt. The man takes no more steps towards him. He’s still. “No?”

“Raise me?” Hawks opens his eyes, glares at the man in front of him. “You fucking bought me! I was a child and you cut me open and tore me apart. You took everything from me. My family, my home, my name. You beat me, electrocuted me, made me bleed over and over! That’s not right! It will never be right! No matter who I turned out to be, no matter who I became. It was wrong.”

Neikan drops all pretense of concern. Looks down at Hawks likes he’s something disgusting. “Look at you, all rebellious. After all that work. It’s endearing yet makes me want to vomit.” The man spits the word at him and Hawks takes a small step back, away from him.

All at once, the world become incredibly quiet. Hawks startles before realizing it was the lack of feedback from his feathers he was feeling. Hawks hadn’t not felt his wings. Not in a long, long time.

It has to be Neikan’s quirk.

Hawks wants to run. He wants to get away from here. He wants his wings back. He wants to find the League.

Hawks lunges for the man in front of him, intent on knocking his handler clean out.

You can’t hurt him

You have to hurt him

The sound of the air to his right being disturbed has the hero whipping his head to the side to see what cause it, but the metal chord is wrapping around his wrist before he can dodge. Hawks cries out as he’s yanked back violently. He’s forced to go with the motion so his shoulder isn’t ripped out of it’s socket.

Commission agents. He must have signaled for them.  

His talons flash in the dim light as he goes to rip the chord apart, metal or not. Only, his arm doesn’t make it very far before another chord wraps around his other wrist and yanks it back as well. Suddenly, his muscles seize, and he falls to his knees, biting his lip against a pain he’s far too familiar with.

They’re electrocuting him. Far more than their typical voltage. He feels like he can’t breath, or that may be the panic. Hawks can’t fight back the small whines that manage to escape his mouth as he fights against his own muscles.

Black shoes slowly enter his line of sight and he struggles harder. Ignoring how he feels like he’s being ripped apart by the force. He can’t go back.

He can’t go back the Commission, to Neikan, to her.

He can’t he can’t he can’t

He won’t survive it again. Hawks can’t lie to himself anymore, can’t pretend like it’s all something he can take.

He can’t.

Hawks yells as he fights against the wires. Pays no mind to the pain ripping him apart. Hawks knows freedom now, and he won’t go back, he’d sooner die.

He’d sooner die.

“You’ve always been a tragedy. Born with such a versatile and powerful quirk. And we were able to make it perfect. But no matter what we did with you, all this work, and you’re still impossible to fix. As pathetic, fallible, and a slave to your selfishness and misplaced pride as the day we saved you.” Hawks lets out a choked sob. He needs his wings. He wants his wings.

“God, you’re a dick.” Hawks eyes snap open, unaware that he had closed them. The dirty floor in front of him is blurry from the water obscuring his vision. “You’re the one I gotta kill, right?”

Hawks didn’t know his body could make tears.

“Dabi.” He sobs out, like the man’s name is a lifeline.

Dabi doesn’t hesitate, doesn’t let him doubt for a moment. “I’m here, Dove. They won’t touch you again.” Hawks gasps heavily, trying to get his breathing under control against the feeling of his muscles tearing apart.

Neikan clicks his tongue above him, far too close for Hawks’ taste. “Hm. I should have known you’d whore yourself out to the first man to pretend to care about you.”

“Ohh yeah, you’re the one.” Dabi’s voice wavers on the ‘oh’, almost like he’s laughing.

Hawks can’t twist to see him, but feels the pressure behind the chords lighten up as blue flashes to the sides. Dabi was targeting the people holding him down.

Hawks doesn’t hesitate for a second. He clenches his fist and throws his arm forward. A loud crack echoes through the room as the chord’s anchor is ripped out of the ground. The concrete goes flying with it, and the agent ducks another blast of fire, abandoning his job.

Hawks turns to his other side and drags his talons against the other wire. Even with the tension, the intertwined metal barely frays. He goes at it again and pulls. This one snaps and Hawks throws himself towards the agent. The woman raises her hand but Hawks is dodging under it and slamming his fist into her jaw. She’s not even on the floor before he’s turning to take in the room. Neikan and the other agent have their attention on Dabi. Neikan has drawn his handgun again but doesn’t have a second to aim as Dabi keeps them moving. It’s clear that he can only block one quirk on a time, and he’s still using it on Hawks.

The other agent is trying to get around to Dabi’s back, but his careful about his own position.

Hawks realizes with a start he’s never actually seen Dabi fight before. Outside of shooting flame at him at their initial meeting. Then again, the villain clearly wasn’t actually trying to take him down at the time. He wanted to know what Hawks was doing, even while acting tough.

It’s obvious now that Dabi knows what he’s doing. His footwork keeps him steady and balanced as he moves away from the two.

Hawks is darting under Dabi’s outstretched arm and straight for the other agent right as the stream of fire dies out. The other agent is just as easy to take out as Hawks dodges a spike protruding from their forearm and grabs their arm, shifting his weight and throwing the agent over his shoulder. He bounces on the ground only once before Hawks kicks him in the face with his heel. The man goes limp immediately and the spike retracts.

Hawks straights up and turns back towards Neikan.

The man is sweating and rolls to the side to dodge another blast of fire. The back of his hand and forearm is shining bright red.

Hawks lurches out of shock when the world comes back into his head with vengeance. His feathers were back. Then, Neikan was-

He regains his focus to see Dabi watching Neikan with a sneer as the man raises his weapon and finally fires at the villain. Twice, in rapid succession.

As it turns out, Hawks’ quirk was not done surprising him. He’s on Dabi a flash, wrapping his arms around the man’s waist and spinning him out of the way.

Neikan fires again and Hawks pushes Dabi to the ground and goes down with him, ducking his head.

Bullets are not so much a threat now for Hawks, apparently, but dragging Dabi around with him was still posing its own challenge.

Another sharp echo through the room has Hawks closing his wings around the both of them and forcing them to harden. The impact against his feathers doesn’t cause pain, but it’s still uncomfortable. Hawks ducks his head into Dabi’s chest.

“Woah.” Dabi whispers, no doubt taking in the metalesque feathers surrounding them.

They need to move. Hawks had no doubt Neikan had more backup than just two agents. Clearly, he had been expecting Hawks to show up at some point.

Hawks’ stomach sinks as he feels the shield around them drop. His wings reform tightly against his back.

He’s up and moving, leaving Dabi on the ground before the next shot can be fired.

The world seems to move in slow motion as he approaches the man, watches the handgun take aim once again.

Watches his handler’s finger flex against the trigger. Before he can even squeeze the trigger fully, Hawks’ hand is wrapping around the metal and he tightens his grip with everything he has to give. The metal deforms under his hand and he yanks it from the older man's grasp and throws it across the room.

His fist meets Neikan’s jaw before the man can even flinch at the motion.

Just like the others, Neikan falls.

Hawks stands over him, chest heaving. He doesn’t move, doesn’t blink.

A hand grabbing his makes him flinch violently but he relaxes at the flash of familiar staples when their fingers intertwine. Hawks keeps his gaze on their hands as he breathes, trying to get himself under control.

“How,” He pants, “did you find me?”

Dabi snorts as if remembering something funny. “Shig came busting in yelling about you being an idiot and the Commission blah blah. I went where he said you were. His instructions were shit.”

Hawks turns towards the villain and presses himself against him, tucking his head into the taller man’s neck. “Thanks. But I am so, so, mad at you.”

Dabi stills. His voice drops all humor as he responds quieter than before. “Hawks, I couldn’t stay. I was going to hurt you-“

“No, you weren’t, you dumb fuck. That’s not what I was talking about.”

“…huh?” The confused tone makes him grin, lips brushing against scarred skin. Dabi shivers underneath him.

“The inhibitors didn’t go off, genius. You were upset, but you weren’t going to hurt me. I’m mad because you left. Without telling me anything.”

“Well I didn’t have a choice, Hawks! They weren’t going to ignore that shit and then Kurogiri opened a portal and I had to leave anyway because you were safe but I still have to kill Endeavor-“

“Endeavor! Is he, sorry for interrupting, they said he was here? Are you okay?”

Hawks relaxes as Dabi’s hand rubs up his free arm. “Yeah, don’t worry about it. The League got out and I came to help you, but I gotta go meet with them-“

Hawks hand squeezes down suddenly, enough to make Dabi wince harshly. He lets up slightly. “No. You are not leaving me again.”

Dabi tugs against his grip. “Hawks come on; I can’t stay. I can’t be around heroes and I already fucking let Endeavor get away for this, so I need to go.”

Hawks rips his hand away from Dabi’s and pushes off the villain, turning. “Okay.” He looks down at Neikan’s slack face. At the blood gathering underneath the skin of the man that raised him.

The room is silent. “Hawks?”

“What?” Dabi doesn’t say anything further. “I said okay. Go.” Hawks drops to a crouch in front of Neikan and begins looking rooting through his pockets, looking for a phone. He needed to call Aizawa. They didn’t know where he was. Dabi needed to get out. He couldn’t leave Neikan and the agents here to report the situation back the Commission. Why won’t he leave. The best option was to take them to UA for the time being and then hand them over to the police when the case opened. Hawks stomach churns and he swallows heavily. The Commission almost had him again. Hawks has to send the man who raised him to jail.

The sound of footsteps getting farther from him, horrifyingly, makes tears blur his vision yet again. Hawks ignores the shaking of his hands, chokes on his own breath to keep silent.

Hawks couldn’t remember ever crying in his life, and now he’s done it twice in one day.

The Commission almost got him.

His hand misses the pocket three times from his shaking before he’s able to reach in and pull the phone out. He shoots a text to Aizawa, simple enough that he only has to retype it four times to make it legible.

The footsteps stop, not yet through the doorway. The silence in the room feels similar to waiting for a bomb to go off.

Hawks explodes first.

“If you’re going to leave, then just. Fucking. Leave!”

Gravel grinds into the ground with the unmistakable sound of boots turning. The footsteps come back towards him at a much faster pace than they left.

Hawks lets go of the phone, holds his breath as Dabi drops to his knees next to him. He pulls Hawks’ head into his chest and wraps his arms around him tightly and doesn’t budge as Hawks weakly pushes against him, trying to get away. Dabi doesn’t let go.

There’s nothing that could have possibly stopped the sob that rips its way out of his chest. The arms around him tighten and Hawks slowly stops pushing to instead raise his own arms to mirror the hold. He clutches tightly onto Dabi’s jacket and doesn’t let go either.  

He sobs again, and again, until he’s full on crying into the villain’s chest. Dabi keeps his silence, doesn't explain himself. Just holds Hawks as he lets himself break apart. 

Hawks wants to ask, wants to know why he turned around. Why he didn't make it out of the room. Yet he can't bring himself to, afraid that any comment is going to shatter the moment. That Dabi is going to disappear and he's going to be alone with the Commission once again. 

When he’s calmed down enough that he can breathe again, Dabi finally speaks.

“Nevermind.”

Hawks chokes out something halfway between a laugh and a sob at the single word. He removes one of his hands to limply hit Dabi in the chest, lighter than the villain deserved, really.

Chapter Text

When Aizawa finds them some time later, Hawks is sitting against the wall with his arms propped up on his bent knees watching Dabi periodically kick Neikan. He’d been on the phone with the League for some time and Hawks was only half listening to their conversation.

Aizawa pauses at the sight of Dabi, who in turn freezes both his kicking and conversation to stare at him in return.

“Wassup.” Hawks offers after an entirely too long silence. Aizawa’s eyes flick from Dabi to latch onto Hawks and he quickly makes his approach.

He kneels in front of the younger hero and places a hand on his knee. “How are you?”

Hawks shrugs. “Honestly, kind of having an existential crisis. That man raised me.” He nods towards Neikan and Aizawa spares a glance over his shoulder before turning back to Hawks. “And I feel bad, I feel guilty and ungrateful and selfish. He raised me. I knew him longer than I’ve known anyone. So I’ve been sitting here trying to think of all the good memories I’ve had with him. And I-“ Hawks laughs dryly, “cannot think of a single goddamn one.”

Aizawa releases a heavy breath before drawing back his arm to rest it on his own knee.

“One time, for my birthday, I guess, he gave me a slice of cake. It was good. And then they woke me up at like 2 am and made me do circuits until I threw up. To work it off, he said.” Hawks winces at a particularly loud thump as Dabi kicks Neikan once again.

Aizawa, however, doesn’t flinch. “They’ll be locked away for a long time, Hawks. I promise you that. But,” He turns once again to look at Dabi. “what’s he doing here?”

Dabi shoves his phone in his pocket, glaring at the teacher. “Are you really giving me shit right now? I’m here because the Commission almost fucking nabbed him again and I had to help him while you all were jerking off back at UA. Thanks, Dabi, for saving the spearhead of our dumb legal battle we still haven’t actually started yet.” He spits out the last sentence in a mocking tone and Hawks drops his head back onto his forearms as Aizawa full stands up and turns towards the villain.

“Maybe if you bothered to stick around, you’d know why we haven’t. But you didn’t, so I guess you won’t.”

“Maybe I would have stuck around if you gave Hawks an inch of privacy with me there.”

“Oh, please, we both know that’s not the reason you left. You left because you can’t manage to act right and know you’re not good for Hawks.”

“Not good for Hawks? I’m the only fucking reason we’ve even made it this far and why he’s not currently getting vanned back to Torture Central.”

“He needs more than big actions, like quiet support when he’s in a bad headspace. Which you’re only proving to me you still don’t understand because you’re standing here arguing with me about petty opinions while he’s over there trying to wrap his head around taking down the only father-figure he’s ever had.”

At that, there’s finally silence. Hawks can feel eyes on him but doesn’t raise his head or make a move to acknowledge it.

“I thought he needed space.” Dabi’s voice is uncharacteristically subdued, like Hawks isn’t meant to hear.

Aizawa sighs heavily once again. “You know a lot about him, more than anyone, but you’re still missing the little things. When Hawks needs space, he flies. When he starts spiraling mentally, he withdraws into himself and shuts down. That’s when he needs someone.”

Hawks wasn’t particularly aware he does that but thinking about it; Aizawa is right. Staring at the sky and aimlessly flying in the sky were both escape methods for him. Up until now, he hadn’t realized he falls back onto one or the other depending on how he was feeling.

“I want to do better.” Dabi finally offers, after yet another silence.

“You’re never going to do better; you’re never going to be good for Hawks if you can’t make a choice. This is no longer a situation where you can play both sides.”

Hawks squeezes his arms tighter, not lifting his head. Dabi just barely chose to stay with him forty minutes ago, how can Aizawa ask him to give up his life goal, the entire reason he lives the life he does. And for what? Hawks?

“How?” Dabi finally asks, more vulnerable, unsure, than Hawks has ever heard him. “I can’t walk away from Hawks again, but I can’t not be what I am. I can’t.”

Please, Shota. Don’t ask him to choose. Don’t. I can’t do this right now.

“Maybe you can’t right now, but do you want to? Do you want to let Dabi go?” The question makes Hawks startle a little. Aizawa shouldn’t know who Dabi really was, Hawks never told anyone. He's sure Shoto didn't either. But maybe he only knows Dabi isn’t a true identity? It wouldn’t be that hard to figure out, given the meaning of his name and the fact that he has no record at all.

“I don’t know.” Hawks squeezes his eyes shut tighter, resisting the urge to cover his ears. He doesn’t want to hear this. “I don’t know. I always planned to die like this. I never wanted anything but this revenge. But then Hawks came, and I wanted him too. I don’t know my path is anymore, I don’t know what this means.”

“It means it’s about time you think about what you actually want from this life. The way you’ve been, is that how you want to die? Is that how you want to feel for the rest of your life? Or are there other things you’re willing to live for, now?”

After yet another silence, Hawks finally lifts his head only to immediately catch Dabi’s gaze. The villain was already watching him.

Hawks can’t look away. Neither can Dabi, it seems.

Eventually, Dabi’s internal storm is interrupted by Neikan groaning loudly behind him. Before Hawks can even think to do something about him, Dabi is turning and kicking him in the head hard enough that the man stops stirring once again.

“Can I have my existential crisis after we help Hawks?”

Aizawa shrugs and approaches Goon #1. “I guess, as long as it’s had.”

Hawks watches Dabi approach him and only stares at the hand offered to him for a short moment before taking. When Dabi helps him up, he doesn’t drop his hand. Hawks winces when he feels his hand start to lock up.

“I’m going to stress grip.” He warns him, voice quiet.

He feels Dabi shake with silent laughter. “Yeah? Me too.”

Hawks lets himself lean into Dabi’s arm as they walk towards Aizawa. The teacher’s eyes flick down to look at their hands for a second before looking away, face unreadable. “I’ve already people coming to take care of them. Let’s go while the scene’s still clear.”

They head for the door and Hawks keeps his eyes off the man under them, even as he feels Dabi ‘trip’ on his body when they walk past him.

Aizawa leads them through the building in a different direction than Hawks came in from. When he spots the car they’re approaching, he can’t help but make a face. He doesn’t get in any type of vehicle, like, ever. He also, however, is aware that Dabi gets major motion sickness and there’s no way Hawks is ending this day with getting puked on.

Which, ultimately, was also an issue if they traveled by car. Whatever. He’d just stick his head out the window if it came to it.

When they settle in the car, Hawks is the first to break the silence. “I don’t know if Neikan was able to alert the Commission or not. I know he was able to signal for backup. They were expecting me, I’m sure. Why else would they be here?”

Aizawa grunts in response. “It doesn’t matter. We’ve spent these last few weeks gathering evidence and planting our own sources in the Commission. We have more than enough to make a case. If they make a move to destroy evidence, then our people will know immediately, and we can move before they’re ready. Right now, it’s a matter pinning as many people involved as we can.”

Hearing that takes a huge weight off of Hawks’ shoulders. No matter what happened now, UA was ready to make a move on the Commission. They’ve spent this time making sure all their bases were covered, that they’ve found everything there is to find.

No matter what happens, the Commission is never going to get away with this again. They were never going to do what they did to Hawks to anyone else.

That alone, is all he wanted from this. What made everything he’s been through since that day in the League of Villain’s hideout worth it.

Exhaustion takes over and he let’s his eyelids drop and fully leans onto Dabi, who puts his arm around him to hold him tighter to his chest.

The flight here took some time, even at his new and improved speed; so, the car ride was going to be long as hell.

Hawks tucks his face in harder into Dabi’s neck and curls his fingers into the villain’s shirt. His other hand is still holding onto Dabi’s for dear life, and the villain is squeezing back just as hard.

With a jolt, Hawks realizes their position was almost identical to the way Hawks woke up on Dabi after his first meeting with the League.

Except this time, Dabi was holding onto him just as tight.

Chapter Text

“The last time I went out on a limb for Dabi, he almost hurt Hawks.”

“No, he didn’t.” Hawks is quick to inform the room before angling himself back towards Aizawa. “We talked about this. Dabi wasn’t going to hurt me, just neither of us were ready for the conversation we were having.”

Aizawa sighs heavily and massages the bridge of his nose. Hawks almost feels sorry for the stress he’s been causing the teacher lately. Man just wanted to be an underground hero, not babysit a class of young heroes as well as the No. 2 hero and his dangerous love interest.

“But, I mean, I’m not telling any of you what to do I just wanted to… clarify that.” Hawks says to the entirety of class 1A as they stare at the two heroes.

Finally, one of the kids speaks up. “I think it’d be okay. Especially if Dabi is wearing the inhibitors. Realistically, what could he do? We’ve faced full power villains before.”

“I’m looking at worse case scenario here. Because, as your guardian, it’s my job to mitigate risk. I cannot allow a villain to stay in your dorms on the off chance that he won’t be able to hurt anyone. Dabi has gone after you all before. He’s hurt you all before.”

Tokoyami speaks up this time. “Right, he has. So, it stands to reason that we are all capable of making an informed and reasonable decision about this. We understand the risks. And I may not be impartial, but I think this would be the best situation for Hawks.”

Hawks fights down the urge to embarrass his intern and ruffle his feathers and instead stays silent, reveling in the warm feeling in his chest.

Momo nods along with Tokoyami before adding her own input. “Hawks has finally made a real home here. He should be comfortable in his room, not forced to wherever Dabi is being kept. We’ll be fine, Aizawa-sensei.”

Several of the other students echo their agreements, someone even adding a quiet “We’re not scared of Dabi!”.

“And it’s not like he’s ever going to be alone with us. Hawks may not have been in the best state of mind when he got here, but he’s healed a lot. Regardless of his relationship with Dabi, we all know Hawks puts his job above anything. Worst case scenario? We’ll have the No. 2 hero here to handle it. I trust that.” Horrifyingly, Hawks feels his eyes burn again at Midoriya’s words. His body is determined to make up for years of not crying, it seems.

For the first time since Aizawa summoned them all, Bakugo speaks up. “Out of everyone here, I’m the most qualified to speak on this. Dabi personally kidnapped me and took me to the League of Villains. If anyone has a say in this, it should be me. Dabi’s an asshole, and I have no idea what interest you have in him” The kid looks at Hawks and he just shrugs. He’s pretty sure everyone’s wondering the same thing. It’s hard to explain, so he’s not going to. “Bottom line is; Dabi’s no threat to me. I’ll blow him to bits before he tries anything. And we’ve all trained with Hawks. Like Deku said, Hawks can handle him.”

Bakugo seems to be the final factor that wears down Aizawa and the teacher ducks his head for a moment. “If any of you die, I’m telling your parents it was a kitchen grease fire.” The kids cheer in victory and Hawks can’t help but laugh with their contagious excitement. When they quiet down, Aizawa continues on. “Dabi will be staying in this dorm tonight and until further notice. I expect all of you to be on high alert at all times, regardless of his lack of quirk. If Hawks isn’t with him, you get away immediately and message me. He will have the same hours as you all, but if he breaks curfew, you will assume he is acting on his own and, again, will message me. A teacher will be on duty in the dorm at all times. Am I understood?”

The students all shout their agreement in perfect sync and Hawks takes a moment at how UA managed to wrangle so many kids into willing obedience without any of the methods the Commission used.

From what he’s seen, Hawks knows it’s born from respect and trust. He takes a moment to mourn how he never had the chance to create those kinds of relationships with the people in charge of raising him.

The more time he spends with these kids, Hawks wonders how different he could have been if raised the why people are supposed to be.

Hawks flashes the kids double peace signs and a bright, genuine smile that has half of them melting as if he was a puppy dog they just found, before turning to follow Aizawa out of the building and across the lawn. They were headed to a building Hawks was far too familiar with. This time, however, the circumstances where much better.

Unable to slow keep himself under control, Hawks beats Aizawa to Dabi’s current holding room and throws the door open and announces, entirely too loud for the small room, “We’re back! Now pack up your shit you’re moving.”

Dabi gives him a long-suffering look before pointedly glancing around the empty room. “What stuff, Birdy? I didn’t pack for a slumber party.”

Hawks smiles sweetly at him. “I was talking about your emotional baggage. Come on.”

Dabi stares blankly at him for a few seconds before rising out of his chair and following Hawks out of the room. Muttering, “Give a man some therapy and he’ll start going after you too,” under his breath, as if neither of the heroes could hear him.

Aizawa starts talking, completely ignoring their interaction. “Dabi, I’ve gone out on a limb for you before and regretted it. Now, I’m doing the same but with more stakes. If you hurt any of my students, again, or hurt Hawks, again, I actually will sacrifice my hero career and kill you. Understood?”

After a pause, Dabi’s face stretches into a grin. “You’re fun.” When Aizawa narrows his eyes dangerously, Dabi throws his hands up to placate the hero. “I’m just saying. I like heroes who don’t bullshit. Your students will be fine. I’m here for Hawks, anyway. I’d prefer if your brats stay away from me too.”

The group stops before walking into the dorms. Dabi takes a moment to eye the steps where he had brought a dying Hawks at the beginning of all of this.

“Well, that’s good, because you’re not going to be away from Hawks’ side for a second while you’re on this campus. You’ll have more freedom than before, but if at any point you are found alone, you will automatically assumed an active threat and dealt with accordingly. You will not leave your room after 10 PM. A hero will be on duty at all times inside the dorm. Understood?”

Dabi nods once before Hawks is latching onto his wrist and pulling him inside with badly contained excitement. The villain only has time to absorb the entire class staring directly at him, and lock gazes with Shoto, before he’s being practically dragged up three flights of stairs. “Jesus christ, slow down.”

“I don’t do slow.” Hawks says, although he does significantly slow his pace. Once they reach the end of the hallway, Hawks opens the door for him and waits for the villain to step in first. Dabi gives Hawks a funny look for his just-barely puffed feathers and jittery energy as he walks past. Inside, however, he understands why Hawks is acting different.

This space is his.

There are stickers clumsily placed on the windowsill, books scattered on his dresser and beside his bed. A laptop sits open but asleep near his pillow. Posters and pictures following no theme are strewn across his walls. Dabi’s eyes lock onto an organized pile of jewelry sitting on the nightstand and can’t help but grin. “You don’t even have these piercings.” He says, amused, as he picks up one meant for a cartilage bridge.

Hawks flushes behind him, grabbing the metal out of his hands and placing it back where it was. “I like how they look.”

“The piercings? Or the pretty, shiny metal?” Hawks only shoots him an agitated look and Dabi can’t help but laugh in return. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m not judging your collection. I’m just starting to wonder if you like me or the staples.”

“The staples.” Hawks mutters darkly without hesitation and Dabi only cackles louder.

Once he gets himself back under control and grabs onto Hawks’ hand. “I like your room, Kei. It’s a lot better than the Commission or your dumb apartment. I can tell you’re comfortable here.”

Hawks’ feathers fluff at either the compliment or the nickname, it’s hard to tell, but he does step towards Dabi and press into his front. Their hands are still locked together as the hero presses his forehead against Dabi’s neck. “I missed you.” His voice is quiet, subdued, prompting Dabi to somber completely.

Dabi places his free hand on Hawks’ hip and rubs it up his back, soothing. “I’m sorry, Birdy. After everything that had happened, I felt I needed to. That I couldn’t be who you needed. I never wanted to hurt you. Now I know I did anyway.”

“Yeah, you did. The timing wasn’t great, and I was scared and confused.” Dabi’s hand tightens, and Hawks strokes the back of it with his thumb to calm him. “But I had people here in my corner, that just wanted me to heal. I was able to do that with their help. Looking back, I don’t know if that would have ever happened with you here. More than likely, I would have tailed you around like a puppy, waiting for you to tell me what was right or wrong.”

“And I would have done just that, if our time here before I bailed is anything to go by.” Dabi concedes.

“But I know how to make those decisions now, how to live for myself. I want to live for myself.”

Dabi presses his nose into the hero’s hair and presses his hand into the small of Hawks’ back to pull them closer together. “Damn. I really owe Eraserhead one.”

Hawks snorts and shakes his head lightly. “All that man wants is some peace. All you’ve got to do is stop kidnapping children.” Hawks releases Dabi’s hand to jab him in side when he makes a noncommittal noise.

“I’m kidding. Seriously. Hawks, a lot of my life has been numb, and a lot of my past is a blur. All I really knew was the hate I have for Endeavor. It wasn’t just the strongest thing I felt, it was really the only thing I felt. And then you came.” Dabi turns his head to press his cheek into Hawks’ hair. “Suddenly, hate wasn’t the only thing I felt and that scared me. I didn’t want to lose that because it was the only sense of identity I had. So, I chased it, and left you behind. But then Shigaraki came in saying you were in trouble and then I heard you yelling, and you sounded so desperate and terrified. And-“  Dabi swallows heavily, so Hawks grabs his hand back and squeezes tightly to let him know he’s still listening. “and I entered that room, I heard what he said, and you were on the ground struggling and, God, I can’t even put into words what I felt in that moment. All I can say is nothing has ever compared to it. I don’t know what to do about Endeavor or the League at this point. But what I do know is that I will do anything asked of me to stay by your side.”

“Oh god,” Hawks’ voice is shaky and wet sounding, making Dabi startle. “I’m- I’m stress gripping.” Sure enough, Dabi feels the muscles and tendons in Hawks’ hand start to lock up.

“Did I upset you?”

“No! No,” Hawks is quick to answer, “I don’t know why I’m doing this. I’m happy.” He sobs out, despite his words. “I’m happy you’re here and my life has changed so much and now I get you too.”

Dabi leads them towards the bed and leads Hawks to flop on top of him. The hero’s wings stretch out over the sides of the bed and flop down. Hawks buries his face in the juncture of Dabi’s neck as their joined hands are trapped between them. “Yeah. You got me.” He says quietly as Hawks continues to shake with quiet, muffled sobs.

Hawks pointedly ignores Dabi’s hiss of pain as he shoves his freezing hands under the man’s shirt. “Why are you always fucking freezing. It’s not normal. Go to a doctor.”

Without moving his hands, Hawks shrugs against Dabi’s chest. “I guess I never really recovered from those winter months when you abandoned me to freeze.” The drawn-out silence has Hawks shaking with silent laughter, knowing the other is struggling to find a way to respond to that.

“You know, I’m never going to win any argument we have.” Dabi’s resigned voice only makes Hawks’ struggle to contain his laughter worse.

“So? We never argue.”

“What the fuck are you talking about? Last week I had to fight to sleep on the bed because I said I didn’t like-“

Hawks cuts him off before he can continue, “I was in a mood! It doesn’t count.” Even without seeing his face, he knows Dabi’s rolling his eyes. After a moment of peaceful silence, Hawks ruins it by abruptly rolling over Dabi so he can reach the remote. The man exhales sharply underneath him at the sudden weight. Completely ignoring him, Hawks rolls back over and turns the TV on. “What do you want to watch? Oh, look, an American Christmas movie.”

Dabi twists to put his hands on Hawks’ hipbone and stomach. “Nothing.” He answers, leaning forward to gently bite at the soft skin on Hawks’ neck. The hero stutters for only a moment, breath catching, before he shoves a hand in Dabi’s face and pushes him off.

“No! No. We are not fucking in a high school’s dorm.”

Dabi bites his hand more harshly and Hawks jerks it back with an unimpressed frown. Grinning, Dabi runs his hands up the hero’s sides. “Why not? All those fuckers left for break already.”

“Not all of them.” Hawks huffs, although he lets Dabi’s hands continue to roam. “I can still hear a few.”

The villain pauses his hands for a second, hesitating before asking. “Shouto, too?”

Hawks is gently when answering, immediately understanding his concern. “No, he left some time ago.” Dabi nods but doesn’t say anything further. “I gave him one of my feathers before he left. If anything happens, I’ll know immediately.”

Dabi nods again before closing his eyes and letting his head rest on Hawks’ shoulder. “Thank you, Kei.” The hero chitters reflexively at the nickname and Dabi can’t help but grin, only for it to drop a moment later. “Sorry for the mood kill.” Hawks hums noncommittedly, to show he was listening, but doesn’t offer a response. “I feel like a fucking fraud. A year ago, I didn’t care what happened to him. I hated him, blamed him. At one point, I considered killing him just to hurt Endeavor. Now I give a fuck about what Endeavor does to him?”

Hawks nudges him weakly with his elbow. “You were a different person a year ago. The only thing that mattered to you were negative emotions that were aimed at Endeavor. I can imagine it makes you feel fake, but it’s a good change, Dabs. And, just so you know, Shouto doesn’t hate you. I keep trying to get him to talk to you, but he’s convinced we need space to ourselves right now.”

“Kid’s probably right. It’s probably not the time to add more shit to our list. I’ve avoided my family for like 15 years. It can wait longer.”

“Not too long. It’ll be good for you to see your family again.” Hawks urges.

“What would you know about families?” Dabi mutters before shutting his mouth with a distinct click. Silence fills the room, louder than either of them had been all evening.

They both attempt to break the silence at the same time.

“Uh-“

“I-“

Hawks looks at Dabi with infuriatingly calm eyes. “Go on.” He prompts.

Dabi sniffs before speaking slowly, getting a feel for the words in his head. “That was… extraordinarily uncalled for and what you were saying was completely reasonable. I’m sorry.”

Hawks quirks his lips at him in a weak smile. “That was a pretty good apology. Have you been practicing?”

Dabi groans and ducks his head again. “Hawks-“

“What I know about families is that I spend a lot of time thinking I want to see my parents again. At least my mom. There’s a lot I want to ask her. To tell her. To finally get answers to things I can’t let go. I imagine your mother, at least, feels the same way about her eldest child.”

“I’m sorry.” Dabi says again, muffled and barely audible.

“It’s alright Dabs. I know taking other people’s reactions in account is something new you have to get used to.”

The villain shakes his head against Hawks’ side. “It’s really not new when it comes to you. Even before all of this, half the things I said were to see how you would respond. But lashing out is still my go-to when people say things I don’t like.”

“I understand, Hot Stuff. It’s nothing genuine, you just wanted me to drop it. Don’t worry too much about it. But just remember most people aren’t going to respond to stuff like that as I did. Bakugo, for example, would definitely try to kill you. Koda might cry, and what would you do then?” Hawks asks as he twists his fingers through the other man’s dark hair.

“I don’t even know who that is.” Dabi deadpans. Hawks doesn’t clarify, just shakes with silent laughter. “Whatever. Just put the dumb Christmas movie on. The mood is more dead than my skin.”

“Dabi.” Hawks’ laughter finally escapes, dispersing any tension still hovering in the room.

Hawks feels Dabi shift beside him when he bolts up in the middle of the night.

“Hawks?” Dabi manages out, voice slurring as he rubs at his face.

The hero doesn’t answer, all attention on his feather miles from the dorm. It was hot. Extraordinarily hot. No natural heat, and nothing that should be felt in the middle of the night.

“What? What’s wrong?” Still, Hawks doesn’t answer. His hand covers his mouth, mind miles away as he strains to hear anything. To get confirmation.

All at once, he’s thrown back into the room as the feather snaps and the connection is broken. Before Dabi can even blink, Hawks is across the room and throwing on his hero costume. It was almost jarring, to put on the symbol of the Commission’s hold on him after so long.

“Keigo!” Dabi snaps out and Hawks eyes lock on to him, attention stolen by the use of his real name. “What. Is going. On.”

Hawks turns away again, opening the window. “He snapped the feather. I told him to if he was in real danger. I have to go.”

Dabi’s eyes widen at the information, but before Hawks can make a move, he latches a hand onto his jacket sleeve. “Wait. Wait a fucking second-“

“I can’t-“ Hawks insists, lightly pulling his arm to free himself of the grip.

“Endeavor is dangerous. He has no remorse. He won’t hesitate. If he burns you, kills you, I will not ever recover from that. I will burn this fucking world to the ground. I mean that on my life, Takami Keigo.”

Hawks looks back at him, face set and eyes burning harsher than Dabi’s own flame. “Have a little faith in me, Touya. Go tell Aizawa.” With a firm nod from the villain despite from the fear reigning in his eyes, Hawks is out the window and pushing through the cold air burning his face.  

Before, it would take even Hawks at least an hour to get to the Todoroki mansion. Now, however, he was different. He had grown, beyond what the Commission had ever allowed him to be.

Hawks’ own father had hurt him, had beat him. When the Commission had taken him, he had nothing but an Endeavor doll to his name. When training got to hard, he thought of a burning flame clearing his way. When he was in so much pain he could barely move, he held that doll to his chest and thought of nothing else. When Hawks wanted to lay down and let it all go, he thought of becoming a hero like Endeavor. Someone who could be a shining light to all those who needed help and guidance.

As much as Hawks wanted it to be just about Rei and her children, about Shouto. About Dabi. About being a hero. As selfish as it felt, he couldn’t lie to himself, and he wouldn’t.

Hawks trusted Endeavor.

No, that wasn’t it. Hawks wanted to be Endeavor. Keigo trusted Todoroki Enji.

Keigo felt like a fool. Felt used. 

Hawks reaches the mansion in 34 minutes.

Without wasting a second, his feathers dispatch throughout the winding hallways the second his foot touches down.

First priority: find Shouto and get him out.

The feathers in the Western wing of the house start relaying noise and increased temperature. Calling the feathers from the other wings back to himself, he takes off towards the noise.

Hawks is able to pin their location from the information coming from the numerous feathers before any one of them actually find the duo.  

He slams through the door, not bothering with opening the old-styled infrastructure. Golden eyes immediately locking onto Endeavor towering over his youngest child, Hawks has feathers pulling them apart and Shouto out of the house before either of the Todorokis can say anything.

“Hawks!” Endeavor spits it him, yanking the feather from his shirt. Hawks calls it back to himself before standing straight and facing the number 1 hero fully. “What are you doing here?”

“Intervening.”

“It’s not your place. What happens between me and my own children has nothing to do with you, Boy.” Endeavor spits the word at him as if it were derogatory. Although he’s in civilian clothing, his flames still rage around his body. The heat of the room had sweat dripping down Hawks’ back in his heavy jacket.

Hawks disperses his feathers for only a second, shrugging the jacket off. Endeavor tenses at the action, taking it for what it was.

Preparation.

“Actually, as a hero, it is my place.”

“Hero? You’ve been missing for months. People have been searching for you. Thinking you dead or kidnapped. But here you are, breaking into and invading my house. Perfectly fine. How can you still call yourself a hero when you’ve abandoned your duty and allowed people to spend resources on you?”

Hawks’ eyes darken. “How can I call myself a hero? Interesting, coming from you.”

Endeavor’s flames rage at the words and he steps towards Hawks, fists clenched. “I am the number 1 hero. I am the strongest hero, the-“

“What you are is a child abuser and a liar.” Hawks cuts him off.

“Child abuser?!” Endeavor exclaims. “I work to make my child strong, to make him a better hero-“

Hawks doesn’t hesitate to intervene once again. “How’d that go for Touya?”

As soon as the words are out of his mouth, Hawks is throwing himself to the side and rolling back to his feet as flames blow out the wall where he had been standing. Cold air immediately clashes with the sweltering heat of the room.

Endeavor, without pausing, uses his flames to propel himself towards Hawks. Hawks turns with him and leads them both outside, where he can better maneuver.

“You know nothing about Touya!” The larger man bellows at him, pulling back a fist and releasing a simple blast of fire towards Hawks. It’s no effort to avoid the orange flame. The heat doesn’t put him off; he’d dealt with more during his first meeting with Dabi.

“I know you killed him. I know the Commission helped cover it up.” A change in the wind has his feathers screaming the new information at him. The feathers hidden in his hairline fluff in nervous preperation, but he quickly recognizes the air pattern. He’s rather familiar with it, actually. A helicopter. Hawks spares a glance.

A news helicopter.

They must have been in the area. How extraordinarily inconvenient. There goes his disappearing act.

Then again, Hawks doubts Endeavor has noticed it’s arrival. He could work with that.

“Everything I did was to make Touya stronger. He was almost perfect, almost better than me! It was not my fault his body could not take it!”

“It was your fault that you never stopped pushing him.”

“Why would I have? Its my duty to make strong heroes to preserve our society! If he couldn’t take it, he never deserved to be a hero, had no place in this world! You don’t deserve to be a hero! You are a weak, immature child who does nothing but run from both his responsibilities and own battles.” Hawks only allows himself a second to e surprised by the venom in the older man’s voice.

“Yet, I am the number 2 hero, right behind you.” Hawks says, hovering above the flame hero’s last attack.

“Exactly my point! Heroes have grown complacent, weak, and lazy; you should never have gotten this title. I’m going to reform the heroes of this generation. Starting with you. The world thinks you’re dead anyway. They won’t miss you anymore when you truly are.”

And with that, Hawks can no longer put off the inevitable fight. There’s no waiting for Aizawa and other heroes to arrive. He has to handle this now. 

Feathers split off from his wings and come at Endeavor from all directions. The larger man retaliates by sending off a wave of fire around him, incinerating each feather and blasting himself at Hawks once again.

However, Endeavor has no chance on closing in on him as Hawks tucks his wings and dives back towards the ground. With his back to Endeavor, he sends more feathers to disperse around the yard. Hiding in the trees, behind rubble, in bushes.

The feathers still on his back alert him to the approaching heat and he shoots straight back into the air. The wind whips his hair into his eyes, but it doesn’t bother him much. His feathers are eyes enough for him.

“All you do. Is. Run.” Endeavor repeats, frustration overwhelming every other emotion from the man.

“Really?” Hawks prompts, as two feathers shoot from their hiding places. Once attaches to his wrist as the other on his opposite ankle. In tandem, they pull and Endeavor is spun upside down before the feathers release him and he falls on his back. They shoot back in the foliage, disappearing once again. “Was that better?” He taunts, silently willing Endeavor to overheat himself with his anger.

The older man rises to his feet, face dark. “Your tricks are cowardly and show no true strength.”

“Well, your true strength should focus more on actually laying a finger on me. Or, flame, I suppose.” To prove his point, another feather shoots across the yard and slices a long cut across both of his thighs.

Endeavor grunts in pain before reeling back his fist in what Hawks’ recognizes as his Flashfire Fist move. Hawks stiffens as the fire takes shape in his palm and drops back down towards the ground, grunting when Endeavor anticipates the move and he’s forced to throw himself off balance, heat biting at his legs. Thankfully, his thick hero gear does a good job of protecting his skin.

“I’ve fought by your side, too, Hawks. I know you. And I know you should be a little more weary of your biggest weakness.”

Hah. Hawks has nearly been overly afraid of fire.

The number 2 hero regains his footing on the singed grass and watches Endeavor, waiting. Backup should be here soon.

Endeavor, however, has no interest in wasting time and lefts both of his hands, heat gathering. Hawks’ eyes widen as he realizes Endeavor’s next move. Flashfire Fist: Hell Spider. The tendrils of fire fan out as the fame hero throws his hands down, only to come together and head towards the center point: Hawks.

On instinct more than anything else, Hawks brings his wings around him, a few feathers separating to completely cover what his wingspan can’t reach. As they move, they harden to the metal-like form he had only utilized a small number of times.

His instincts, however, prove true as the focalized flames hit his metallic wings and disperse in a flash of heat as they fail to make any progress against the barrier. After a second, Hawks returns his feathers to their natural state and lets the wings retract.

Endeavor stares at him with poorly concealed shock. As if in disbelief, he tries to move again. This time, more prepared and confident in his new strength, faces the flames head on. Going airborne, Hawks throws himself straight towards Endeavor. When he meets the fire, his feathers harden once more, and he spins through the attack. The force of the wind he creates from the movement doesn’t allow the flames to actually touch him.

As he touches back down on the other side, right in front of Endeavor, the older man can only stare at him in shock, panting. “Surrender, Endeavor. You can’t-“

Hawks is cut off as the fire surrounding Endeavor suddenly flares up once again. This time, however, heat isn’t the goal. It’s light. Hawks cries out in pain as he’s blinded and jerks back, hands shielding his face on reflex.

Endeavor wastes no time in taking advantage of his distraction.

The older man’s hand shoots out and wraps around Hawks’ neck. Their sizes are disproportionate enough that Endeavor’s fingers nearly touch at the back.

Hawks attempts to gasp as his feet leave the ground and his wings flap feebly behind him. They have no effect, as Endeavor’s grip is too tight to be moved with his unfocused struggle. The hand tightens and Hawks claws at it, gaping as his airway is beyond cut off. As if Endeavor is trying to actually crush it with sheer force alone. Hawks knows that’s a very real possibility. Endeavor’s hand starts to heat up and burn at Hawks’ skin. “I told you.” The number one hero grits out.

But, really, Hawks has been through worse.

Calm.

Always calm. Panic kills. Fear kills.

Calm.

A feather shoots out from behind a bush and pierces Endeavor’s wrist as two more go at his heel. Endeavor grunts at the pain but his fingers slacken just enough that Hawks is able to get in a short breath.

It’s enough.

Hawks grabs onto the wounded wrist with both hands, using it to create momentum along with his wings as he twists his body as far to the side as he can while bringing a leg up, and then down again. His wings give one strong flap in the opposite direction, adding even more force behind his newfound strength. The heel catches the back of Endeavor’s jaw as he strikes the juncture of his neck and shoulder. 

The force of the kick has Endeavor completely dropping his hold as he falls onto his back, gasping. Blood trickles from the corner of his mouth. Hawks drops with him, although catches himself with a hand and raising back up immediately.

As he catches his breath, he sends more feathers at Endeavor. Even knocked down as he is, the older hero manages to burn. What he doesn’t manage to burn, or even spot, is every feather Hawks’ had hidden earlier as they follow directly behind the first feathers.

Every one of them is hardened as they surround where Endeavor lays on the ground, creating a cage. His fire cannot burn them, and they are sharp enough to cut right through him if he attempts to brute force through them.

Endeavor realizes this himself as his furious eyes meet Hawks’ own piercing gaze. “Stay down, Todoroki Enji. This fight is over.”

“You’re a fool, Hawks!” Endeavor yells at him. “What’s your story here? You go missing for months then break into my house! You attack me when I’m training my own son! What grounds do you have?”

“I have more than you know, Enji. Not to mention the attempted murder that you so graciously announced for me.” Hawks looks up at the helicopter, and Endeavor follows his gaze only to have eyes widen with dread as he spots it.

“I had to make better heroes! To protect this country!” Endeavor screams. “What we have isn’t enough! I did what I had to!”

Hawks shakes his head at the man on the ground. “Your wrong. You want the world to watch you, but have you been watching anyone else? Shouto’s generation of heroes is beyond competent and strong. They watched the fall of All Might continued on their path, determined to protect all those that need it regardless of the obstacles and pain they might face. When they enter our ranks, when any one of them surpass me, I will accept it with grace. Because I know they fight to help others, not because they are obsessed with a trivial number.” Hawks backs up as fire shoots from the fallen hero and burns the surrounding grass to ashes.

“Don’t worry about Japan. It will be fine without you.”

Endeavor yells out in response but is only able to release more unfocused flames with the limited movement he has. The feathers remain undisturbed.

Hawks sense the movement behind him before he can actually physically hear anything. Light from numerous sources fill the damaged clearing and Hawks doesn’t turn his attention from Endeavor as UA heroes and cops flood the area. Aizawa comes up besides Hawks and puts a hand on his shoulder. Even with his eyes still on Endeavor, Hawks knows his quirk is engaged when his dark hair starts floating and the flames are cut off. Midnight approaches him and rips her uniform to let out the gas.

Even when, minutes later, Endeavor stops struggling and his eyes shut, Hawks doesn’t relax for a second until Aizawa nods at him. The second the feathers are recalled, a police officer locks quirk suppressing cuffs onto his wrists and it takes almost six of them to lift him.

Hawks almost offers to help until Aizawa turns him away. “Dabi is here.” He says in a hushed voice. Ridiculously, Hawks almost sobs at the thought of seeing the other man so soon. He was expecting a long night before meeting him back at UA possibly the next afternoon. As if sensing his thoughts, Aizawa continues. “I think he has a secondary quirk. It was literally impossible to have him stay behind. We couldn’t do anything.”

Hawks let’s out a weak laugh, knowing Aizawa is trying to get a gauge on his state of mind at the moment.

“There was a camera-“ The teacher cuts Hawks off.

“I know. It was good actually. That’s one court battle we don’t have to worry about. He already gave a confession on live TV. Luckily, we were also ready to move on the Commission. Sending that out delayed our arrival, I’m sorry. But I knew you could handle it. I don’t think Dabi was on the same page, though, so he’s a little aggressive right now.” Hawks can’t help but snort at that. “God, I hope my care isn’t on fire.” That actually pulls a real laugh from Hawks, even if it scratches at his throat and he winces. Aizawa notices immediately. “We’ll head to a hospital first. The closest one. Nothing to worry about now, now that the world knows you’re alive and well.”

“I think it was a pretty good comeback.” Hawks grates out, ignoring the pain.

“Definitely was. It’ll be better when we can announce where you were all this time. Try to refrain from talking, please.”

When they reach the car, Hawks is about fully leaning on Aizawa in exhaustion. The teacher opens the back door for him and Hawks’ mind goes completely blank when his eyes lock on Dabi.

The villain, frankly, looks like a very pissed cat. If cats were often handcuffed to the overhead handles of a car. “Shut up.” Dabi says and that only prompts another horrible laugh from Hawks. The villains eyes widen at the noise, before locking onto the hand-shaped burn on Hawks’ throat.

His hand catches fire.

The fire goes out.

“I told you he could handle it. The injuries are rather minor. Don’t burn my car.” Dabi huffs and Aizawa sees that as enough to drop his quirk. Sure enough, the flame stays out.

Hawks slides into the car and immediately pushes himself against Dabi as his feather cuts the metal cuff. “I feel like we just had a car reunion.” Hawks muses.

“Because we did. Stop doing this to me. And stop talking, too. You sound horrible.” Hawks rolls his eyes, knowing the harshness was sourced from his worry.

“Shouto?” He asks, trying to keep it short.

“He’s okay, thanks to you. Called Aizawa and lit a fire under their ass to stop questioning my story.” Hawks meets Aizawa’s gaze in the rearview mirror and frowns at him, only to receive an exasperated eye roll in response.

Silence fills the car and Aizawa starts the engine, putting in directions for the nearest emergency room. “Hawks-.” He finally starts, only to cut himself off. He rethinks his wording “Do you understand what this means now?”

Hawks frowns in confusion, but Dabi knows exactly what he means. “Endeavor is done. You’re the Number 1 hero now.”

The statement hits him like a brick. Yeah. He was, wasn’t he? Because he had just taken down Endeavor in his own backyard. Hawks allows himself a moment to digest that. What it means. 

“Then, as,” Hawks takes a deep breath, grounding himself, “then as Number 1, I’m making a call. I want this to be public. All of it, every bit. People deserve to know exactly what led to all of this. What Endeavor did, what the Commission did, what I did, what I’ve done in the past. Enough of protecting ‘hero society’. I want the public to make their own decisions and judgements based on nothing but the truth.” He coughs at the end of his rant and Dabi squeezes his hand in response. Regardless, he continues on. “More than that, I want UA and the League to both watch me. To keep me in check. If I fail at my job, I want to be told to my face. Full accountability. Full transparency. Always. If I can’t fix myself, then I will not be Number 1. This will never happen again. I won't let it."

The hand on his own tightens more, almost painfully. Hawks looks up in question, but Dabi is looking out the window. The villain works his jaw for a moment before speaking. “I would have given,” he pauses to take a breath “anything for you to be a hero when I was a kid. I would be different, I think. All of us would. The League, I mean. You would have made it different. I know you would have.”

“Dabi-“ Hawks croaks out, emotion making his damaged voice even worse.

Only, Dabi shakes his head. “Drop it. Please.” He adds the please after a moment. Hawks obliges, knowing he needs to be in his own head right now.

The car ride is silent for a long time, Hawks lulling himself to sleep with the flashing of streetlights and the sensation of his talon scratching gently along the rough material of Dabi’s pants.

But he can’t doze off. Not yet. He has to ask.

“So, the Commission-“

“Stop talking already. You’re gonna go mute.” Despite the reprimand, Dabi fills him in. “Their headquarters are being raided as we speak. That fuckhead President, along many others, have already been arrested. Almost 80 others have been detained for questioning. From Aizawa’s last check in, they were able to secure hundreds of high classification documents. There’s no case they can make for themselves. Not when they’ve saved every piece of evidence we need. They’re done. For good.” Hawks can’t help but let out a quiet sob of relief. He closes his eyes as Dabi reaches over and pulls his head against his chest. "This is it, Kei."

By now, Dabi knew well enough what the best way to calm Hawks was.

“You belong to us Hawks. We created you. Own you. We always will. Why do you insist on fighting us?”

“Fuck you.” Hawks laughs out, voice shaking and wet and terrible sounding.

Neither Aizawa nor Dabi respond to the statement, seemingly aware of who, exactly, it was aimed at.

No, I don’t.

Not anymore, and never again.