Chapter Text
Water from the faucet washed down the yellow bile spit into the basin. V didn’t really have time to move to the bathroom before it came out, leaning over the kitchen sink and heaving in there. She’d thank Johnny for doing the dishes for her, but he was already getting under her skin.
“You need to go see Vik.”
“I don’t need to see Vik, Johnny, it’s just nerves.”
Or stress. Could be that too. Four years, and this was the first time she was calling the shots as a fixer. Every other time Rogue was there guiding her, showing her the ins and outs of what it took to be a fixer. And V was ever thankful for it. Without her guidance she felt like a fish out of water, just trying to get used to being the one dishing out the commands and not being the one taking them. Sure, she wasn’t a merc for very long, but being in a commanding role was very different.
But, Rogue was gone for the moment. Her son called her away for something – the woman was never very specific about her personal life – and so V was left alone to run the whole shebang. Thank God for Claire and her help. Still, it left her stressed, tired, and sick, but it was nothing she needed to see any ripperdoc over, certainly not bothering Vik.
“Right, nerves. And I’m the fuckin’ king of France. Look, V, just go get checked out. Even if it is nerves, which I fuckin’ doubt, you need to stop puking in every open space. Been goin’ on for over a week and it’s fuckin’ gross.”
V rolled her eyes, leaning against the kitchen counter, reaching for her morning cup of coffee. “Alright then, Dr. Silverhand, what do you think is wrong with me? ‘Cause, way I see it, I’m just agonizin’ over the fact Rogue is gone for a bit.”
“Uh-huh. Whatever. Just go see Vik.” Almost five years of this bullshit from Johnny and it still made her groan, feeling like she never stopped spinning her eyes around in her head. By the end of it all she’d need new implants, wearing out the motors that controlled her eyes.
“I’ll see if I can swing it. You know how busy shit gets sometimes. You gonna be doin’ the same old same old?” Coffee hitting her stomach made her almost lurch again, but she sucked in a breath, held it, and subdued the feeling.
“As always. Kid two doors down wants to learn a Samurai song. Kinda weird havin’ to tone it down just so people don’t start askin’ too many questions.” V watched as Johnny pulled up his hair, a trick he learned to keep people from looking at him too hard when he was dealing with strangers for long periods of time. The look was strange on him, really making him look almost entirely different, but she couldn’t deny she loved watching him pull it up. There was just something about the way his hands and arms moved as he did so.
“For you, I know that’s hard. But, if anyone can pull it off, it’s you. Should be home ‘round the normal time today, so we’ll figure out dinner then.”
“Meanin’ I’ll figure out dinner.” Eyes rolled again, V placed her mug in the sink.
“You really that mad that I don’t feel like cookin’ right now? Fuckin’ Christ Johnny, it’s a damn stove. Did you fuckin’ think that you’d go your whole life with someone to make you food?”
“Want the honest answer?”
Smiling, V let out a short laugh, the sound mostly just a puff of air. She knew damn well what the honest answer was, and expected nothing less from him. “No, I don’t need it. Fine, I’ll pick somethin’ up. Just text me whatever you want.”
“If you have time to go pick up dinner, you have time to go see --”
“I’m brushing my teeth and leaving. I don’t need to see Vik.” Walking past Johnny, V took the easy shot of lightly punching his shoulder in playful jest. She wasn’t going to see Vik. As far as she was concerned, once Rogue got back all would be fine.
Teeth brushed, she grabbed that worn leather Samurai jacket, placing it over her body. The sleeves rolled up easily now, used to the action, and she doubted she could ever wear it over her forearms again, the jacket likely never allowing that to happen. Saying their goodbyes at the door, V headed out, strolling into the Afterlife like she owned the place. Oh wait, she did.
Sitting in that booth, she completely understood why Rogue and some other fixers paraded themselves around like they were hot shit. Something about this whole position was like a steroid injection straight into her confidence. Calls began rolling in, and she began rolling calls out, organizing the city to try and retain some semblance of order.
One call, though, she thought about ignoring. The caller ID made her want to hit the ignore button, call her stupid fucking asshole of a lover, and then send a merc out to smack him on the head. But, she refrained, answering the call because she knew if she did all those things she’d hurt Vik’s feelings, and she could never bring herself to do that.
“Heya Vik. Lemme guess, Johnny call you?”
The older man just smiled, shaking his head, not in disagreement, but almost in solidarity for how much shit Johnny did. “How’d ya know? Yeah, he called. Said I needed to force you to come down. Way he was talkin’ --”
“Vik, look. It’s just nerves. Maybe stress. Who knows, but it’s nothin’ serious, I promise. Don’t wanna eat up your time, since that really is money for you.”
His face took on a more serious tone, and V realized he was not going to relent. “V, even if it is stress, you should come get checked out. For you, this level of stress could be pretty bad. Just have Claire do her thing, come down, and I’ll have you out in a few. And if something’s wrong we go from there. Alright?”
Sighing, V knew her fate. Mentally checking off all the things she needed done for the day, she figured Claire could handle a good deal of them. And it’s not like she had to work from the Afterlife, having no in person clients lined up. “Fine, I’ll come by. Just lemme give Claire a heads up, then I’ll stroll on in. And, since I’m feelin’ generous, I’ll even bring you lunch.”
That made Vik soften, his smile worth a million eddies. “Sounds perfect, V. See you soon.” The holo hung up, and V just leaned back on the couch, still debating on whether or not she should send some messenger to tell Johnny to mind his own fucking business. Then again, he was obviously worried, and he knew V well enough to know she was stubborn as fuck, only relenting to very few.
Instructions given to Claire, last minute calls to mercs made, lunch acquired for three (unable to leave Misty out), V was on her way to the ripperdoc. She thought that lunch would just ease things over, give the three of them a chance to sit down and talk, but Vik still seemed bothered. Once Misty left, V placed a hand on his shoulder.
“Vik, c’mon. Shouldn’t I be the one nervous? I mean, it’s my body.”
“V, you’ve only been frazzled a few times in your life. Once when you were about to die. I’m serious, your body isn’t great at handling stress anymore. Let’s just...Let’s get this over with.”
Walking over to the chair, V reclined back in the creaky, leather thing. Out of all the upgrades this little clinic had over the years, the one thing he never seemed to upgrade was the damn chair. At this point, V figured it could pass as antique. Scanner going, V just lazily sat back, waiting for it to say she was just nervous or stressed, nothing more, nothing less.
“Every time I come in here you expect me to die. Thanks to you, I’ve never been further from it. Would it make ya feel better if I called more?”
Vik chuckled, still looking at the screen, eyes always darting. “Yes, it would, actually. Gives me peace of mind that you’re alright. You’re not doing dangerous work anymore, but you’re also not underground. Just wanna know you’re safe.”
“Okay, okay, I’ll call more.” Forever in his debt, if he wanted her to call more, then she would. It was the least she could do.
“Thanks, V. And you could also – whoa.” Something finally registered on the screen, but Vik turned it towards him quicker than V had time to look. Brows knitted together, she leaned forward, actually a little worried this time.
“Wh-what is it? Am I alright…?” V hated the fact that the people in her life had mastered the poker face. Minus Panam. If something was bothering her everyone fucking knew it, and it was damn refreshing after dealing with the shit these people put her through.
“Sit back.” Doing as she was told, V sat back, chewing on the inside of her lip. “You’re pregnant, V.”
“Oh fuck.”
Those words slapped the shit out her harder than any Animal she ever fought during her merc days. The past few weeks played in her head at hyperspeed, realizing now that all the things she contributed to stress and nerves were both that and something much more serious.
“Oh fuck. Fuck. Fuck.” This was not planned – not in the slightest. As far as she knew, she and Johnny were careful. Shit, not like she didn’t have access to the best contraceptives on the damn market. And this still happened? Fuck.
“Johnny just got sober, Vik. It’s been three fuckin’ months, and he’s doing so good. And now I’m about to drop this bomb on him!? Fuck!” V’s fist slammed down on the armrest, momentary frustration let out. Nerves more fried than ever, she started picking at her nails, trying to focus on something else for a few seconds.
“You really think he’s gonna take the news that badly?”
“No. Maybe? It’s Johnny. Most of the time things just kinda coast off ‘im like he’s the fuckin’ streets of Night City. Other times shit gets so deep under his skin he’s in a funk for days. And this? Fuck, I’m not even sure how to take this! Just started doin’ well as a fixer. Just got the okay from Rogue to basically run the show on my own. Johnny’s finally found what makes him happy. This is just…”
“A lot, I know.” Closing her eyes, she felt Vik rest a hand on her shoulder. “Gotta say, I’m glad it’s just this. Seriously thought we’d be in another tough spot, V.”
“You say that like this isn’t a tough spot. Guess it won’t kill me, though. Fuck. What do I do?”
“You know I can’t tell you that. But, I know you’re gonna keep pressing me for advice. My take, just talk to Johnny. Not really his choice what you do, but talking it over might give you some clarity. Better than anything you and I could talk about.”
She supposed Vik was right. Not like Johnny could force her to do anything, really. Never had and never will. But it would inform her decisions moving forward, giving her more to work with. Plus, doing anything in secret was going to hurt him, no matter what, and she was not going to start lying to him again. Promised each other not to do that, and not even this could break that.
“Yeah. Thanks Vik. I’ll uh...I’m gonna go home. Wait for Johnny. Doubt he’s done teachin’ lessons.”
Sliding off the chair, V fixed her clothes, looking at Vik to say goodbye, seeing his arms open. Taking the cue, she hugged him, long and tight, feeling herself be calmed by it. If Johnny up and ran and she decided to keep this kid, maybe she could convince Vik to be its substitute father. The thought made her choke out a cold laugh, saying goodbye before he asked what she was thinking.
The ride home was a blur, as was the elevator ride, and her punching in the code for the door. Once open, she heard Johnny’s guitar being played, a tune she didn’t know. Must have been something for one of the kids. The music stopped as V hung up her jacket, dropping her keys and other items on the table by the door, an item of furniture that always collected clutter.
“You see Vik?”
She nodded, unsure how to even approach this conversation. Sitting on the couch beside him, she curled up against the arm, leaning away from him. “Y-yeah. I did. Guessed correctly that you called him.”
“What the fuck else was I supposed to do? You could be fuckin’ dyin’ and you’d still think you’re botherin’ ‘im. And don’t argue that point, ‘cause I watched you give yourself stitches many times before.” Johnny’s voice wasn’t filled with kindness, but the anger and rage it had wasn’t directed at her. She knew that he was worried, and it always came out as something other than concern.
“What’d the old man say?”
“Well, I’m not dyin’.” Which wasn’t a lie, but fuck she sure felt like it in this moment.
“Thank fuck for that. So then what’s the matter?”
V swallowed, finally looking Johnny in the face. He really was worried, lips always pulled into a straight line when he didn’t know how to express how worked up he was. Looking at him now, V became even more frightened. In her life, all she ever wanted was a family. People to come home to, to love her for who she was. And she found it all, through Johnny, through friends – now she had the prospect of having even more.
“V, you’re scarin’ me. What’s wrong?”
She still couldn’t find the words. How could she explain to him that his reaction meant the world to her? The difference between a happier ending and one where she only had fragments of a fairy tale? Well, no one had a fairy tale ending in Night City, but fuck she was getting pretty damn close to it. To build a better life, a family, with Johnny? Oh shit she didn’t know how badly she wanted it.
“V, c’mon --” His panic was rising, and so was hers. Bite the bullet, get it over with.
“I’m pregnant, Johnny.” Cat was out of the bag. Somehow, she felt the same as when they confessed to each other all those years back, the same feeling of fear and relief mixing inside her. And, like the confession, the world didn’t end like she thought it would.
“Oh,” was all he said, all the emotion dropping from him. And the color from his face on top of that. “Yeah, that uh...Makes sense.”
“Yup.”
Reaching over, Johnny picked his guitar back up, strumming away again. This caused even more confusion in V, moving to sit facing him on the couch, back against the arm rest, one leg pulled up, the other on the ground.
“That’s it? No freak out? No...I dunno, Johnny sarcasm? That’s it? Just an ‘oh’ and a ‘that makes sense’?”
“Not gonna lie, still shocked, but I called Vik figurin’ that you’d either come back with some terminal illness or knocked up. Prepped myself the entire day for it. Spent time thinkin’.”
V couldn’t help but laugh, finding it oddly funny that Johnny put the pieces of the puzzle together before her. “S’pose if you brag about the fact that you’re the expert on female anatomy, may as well use it for somethin’ other than sex. But, alright...What’d that time thinkin’ yield for you? ‘Cause for me? I’ve been on autopilot.”
It was clear his nerves were about as fried as hers, but he always buried in the tunes from his guitar, finding solace in them. “Thought ‘bout while I was in your head, how fuckin’ badly you wanted to build a little family with River for a night. Playin’ with those kids like a fuckin’ gonk. That idea right there pulled you in – among other things I won’t bring up. Back then, thought it was real fuckin’ stupid, V, gotta admit. Then...” He continued strumming, the tune remaining steady. “Then we started this. Started buildin’ a life together. We’ve struggled, but...We’re gettin’ somewhere, right? This was the logical next step.”
“What? You tellin’ me you were gonna bring up bein’ parents to me at some point?”
“Next year. Once I was sober long enough. But, ain’t really my call. What’s your take on this?”
“Ooo, didn’t think you’d ever be a champion of women’s rights. Look how far you’ve come.” That made him stop playing to glare her way, a clear signal that this really wasn’t a joke to him. “I’m scared shitless, Johnny. Thought you’d take this pretty fuckin’ poorly, gotta say. Never thought of you as the father type. But, lookin’ at it now, guess I can’t say I’m surprised. You mentorin’ those kids? Happiest I’ve seen you in a long time. And I want this so fuckin’ bad. You’re right, it is what drew me to River. To have it with you? Can’t complain much.”
Pushing the guitar from him, V crawled over, sitting in his lap to hug him. Johnny buried his face in her neck, pulling her close. “Oh fuck, V. Whoever said man can’t play God has never met you.”
“Johnny, what the fuck does that even mean?”
“You hold life in your hands all the time, V. Resurrection and creation.”
“Johnny, I fucked over a corp to get some engrams and you nutted inside me. It really isn’t that deep.” He grumbled against her, even more cranky as he approached 40.
“Fuckin’ Christ, can you stop bein’ a cunt for more than five minutes? You know what, this kid is being taught by me. Not lettin’ them go their whole life without thinkin’ past the surface level.”
“Gonna play house husband then? I could get used to that.” Both laughed at the thought, likely knowing Johnny would go fucking crazy cooped up in a house being shackled with all the domestic duties.
“Not gonna look the same anymore. You gonna be alright with that? Know how much you love my ass. Fuck, all of the NUSA knows how much you love my ass.”
A kiss to her neck, and V smiled, holding him even closer. “MILFs are in, V, you should know that. Now I got one I can come home to. What a lucky motherfucker am I.”
As tempting as it was, she refrained from making a pun based off his choice of words to describe how lucky he was. Logical next step it was not, not for V and Johnny, two idiots who stumble through life, but they found ways to make things work before. And they’d surely make this work as well.