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When Bucky thinks about it, the signs have always been there. For the past couple of weeks now, he's been feeling nauseous weirdly only in the evenings, when he's brushing his teeth, which never normally happens, happened only once before- when he was knocked up. Alongside that, his chest has been feeling tender and sore, he can't even let Steve play with them in bed without wincing in pain, and constantly has to adjust Evelina when she lays on his chest.
So he shouldn't feel silly for taking these tests. He's certain he's pregnant, there's just no other explanation. Yet he feels so nervous. Nervous that he gets a negative, nervous that he gets a positive.
Three minutes. Bucky has to wait impatiently for three whole minutes. Jesus.
He taps the counter, he's done this before and he's got the patience to do it again. Although, a baby, just shy of thirteen months since they've had their first seems a bit too soon, Bucky thinks. Can they even manage two kids?
He shakes the politics and intricacies of it all out of his mind. He's let himself sink into it before but what good did it ever do? He's got a beautiful baby girl that he loves more than life and if his suspicions are correct now Bucky knows he's gonna be just as in love with their next baby as well.
He rings Steve. The silence of the bathroom is deafening and Leela is still sleeping so it's not like he can go disturb her either.
“Hello baby," Steve drawls. Bucky feels a bubble of happiness seep up into his chest. Butterflies swarm his stomach. Still. "To what do I owe this pleasure?"
"Am I not allowed to ring my husband whenever I please?" Bucky teases.
"You just never do," Steve whines. He laughs. "Everything okay?"
"Yeah, I'm just... in the bathroom."
"Baby, please, the one time you ring me and you know I'm always ready to be seduced but I'm in a fucking meeting hall." Steve groans, Bucky snickers. For some reason he can already feel that Steve is blushing.
"Don't worry, I'm not trying to wake little Rogers up either." Bucky says dryly.
"I'd like to refute that little Rogers is anything but little but I suppose I hear it enough in bed to bother arguing against it." Steve says smugly. Bucky feels like wiping that smirk off his face.
So he does.
"I'm taking a pregnancy test."
There's a pause, Bucky hears an audible gasp. "Wait, you're being serious?!"
"As death." Bucky says.
"Jesus Christ." Bucky hears rustling and he assumes Steve has sat himself down somewhere. "What does it say?"
"We'll find out together I suppose, My timer’s just gone off, you ready?"
Steve laughs nervously, "Whenever you are baby."
They both hold a breath, Bucky turns the sticks over.
"Oh."
"Is that a negative 'oh' or positive?" Steve asks with anticipation. “You’re killing me here sweetheart.”
Positives. All three of them. Bucky smiles, he feels relieved, in a way that he can’t fully understand.
"Mr Rogers-Barnes, it seems that in however many months from now we'll have another tiny to take care of" Bucky says, feels a bubble of laughter rise out of him, his cheeks hurt from how wide he's smiling. "Baby Rogers-Barnes 2.0."
"Oh my god Bucky!" Bucky pulls the phone a little away from his ear at Steve's shout. He should've been prepared for it. "Oh my god." Steve breathes, he's laughing. Bucky laughs too. Hands gripping his phone so tight he wishes Steve could just jump out from it so he could hug him.
"I know." Bucky murmurs. "Not too soon though is it?" He asks out in a rush.
"No, hell no, I mean unless you're not ready or comfortable with-"
"No!" Bucky cuts him off, because fuck no. That, to give away this life he's already fallen so in love with isn't an option for Bucky no more. He breathes out, "no I think- im- Im ready, I just..."
"Then no, it's not too soon. At all." Steve soothes. He lets out a small laugh. "If anything, you know how I've always wanted my tiny avengers team."
Bucky lets out a snort, "My love, if you think I'm going to carry 8 children to appease your fantasy you're going to have to find a clone. Better yet, somebody else!"
Steve laughs, his full body laugh and Bucky can hear the hand that slaps his chest, feels that laugh caress his heart and make him feel light. He aches to be with Steve right now, feel his happiness in real life rather than though the phone. "You say that now Barnes, but when we're on our sixth child you'll have changed your 'tude." Steve teases, and Bucky can hear his smirk.
"Okay, as you’re so adamant, maybe you should carry and birth the next four yeah?" Bucky sasses.
"Ah, see! We can come to an agreement. In fact let's start working on Rogers-Barnes 3.0 already, we have time."
"Stevie you're so insufferable sometimes," Bucky grumbles, but he's laughing behind it all, and so is Steve. This little game of theirs. Bucky thinks about it though, six kids is a fucking lot. But he loves Evelina so much, he could imagine ten tiny Rogers-Barnes. He'll never let Steve get wind of that though.
They share a silence. Before Steve speaks up, he sniffles, Bucky feels his own eyes start to tear up but he holds himself together. "I'm so fucking happy right now Bucky, I wish I could be with you right now."
"So come home, Leela's gonna wake up soon though so that congratulatory baby making sex will have to wait." Bucky says a little mournfully. Because that is some of the best kind of sex.
"I just need to get this fucking meeting out of the way baby, then trash the rest of my schedule, I'm on my way home."
"Steve Grant Rogers skivving on super hot important avengers business? Are you really Steve or some kind of imposter?" Bucky teases.
“Bucky.” Steve whines, "why couldn't our day offs co-ordinate? Why are we still working so much? I'm supposed to be semi retired."
"I dunno, maybe the world needs us more now than it did then."
"The only world I give a shit about now is my world with you, Leela and the little one." Steve sighs.
Bucky sags against the wall, "I'm thinking of giving up the winter soldier mantle." He says contemplatively. "I thought I would need it, the action, to stop me from feeling bored, to stop my mind from going crazy but I'm happy feeling...settled, I'm happy where I am mentally. I just wish I had you with me more. Wish we could enjoy these times together."
"Me too baby." Steve says solemnly. "We should both...take like a couple years out..."
"Not really the kind of conversation we should be having over the phone huh?" Bucky muses, smile playing on his lips.
"I'm gonna beg the rest of my meetings and training off, you’ve made my entire day buck."
Bucky chuckles softly. "Cant wait to see you at home, don't piss off the avengers lot too much yeah?"
Steve chuckles, "Nothing is as important as you and celebrating this miracle you've given me the second time." He says in a rush, Bucky can hear the telltale murmur of people entering in the room on Steve's side. “So they can all fuck themselves.”
Bucky laughs, murmuring how some things will never change.
"Bye baby, love and see you soon." And Steve hangs up. Bucky is once again left with silence, it doesn't feel as if it's drowning him anymore.
He meant to have a shower, Bucky remembers. But he'd spent the last fourty five minutes talking with his husband about their new found miracle. Bucky has the pleasure of carrying their baby, again. The second time. He feels more prepared. Less like he's stepping onto an unsteady bridge, waiting for the framework to collapse and send him deep into restless water. He's sitting at the coast, the point where the waves meet the sand and it washes over him like a gentle caress. He knows what parenthood entails, what it asks of him.
So instead he gathers his hair and ties it into a bun and walks out of their huge bathroom, a little lighter than he felt when he walked in. He can hear snuffling over the baby monitor and makes his way to the nursery.
He walks to the room and to the curtains and opens them. Evelinas soft cooing turns more excited, more determined. There's a gaggle of words, some Bucky can decipher like dada and papa, and others lost in translation. He smiles down at his sweet girl as she rolls over, so nimble on tiny knees. Crawls towards the grate of the cot and stands. The 'dadadadada' and ‘papapapa’ continue.
"Hi sweetheart, you rest up well?" Bucky coos in response, he receives an enthusiastic reply.
He picks her up and Evelina instantly cosies up into his neck, she's so soft and pliant when she just wakes up, Bucky loves it, soaks up every bit of affection he gets. She's so fiercely independent, Bucky loves that, but he somewhat wishes now that their second child is slightly more needy, so he has someone to cuddle for longer. Bucky presses kisses to her hair, loving the soft baby smell to her. It’s comforting.
"Promise you won't be mad at me leela." Bucky tells her, walking out of the room. "Papas having another baby. I'm not too sure if you can understand it but I hope you'll love them just as much." He murmurs gently. Evelina doesn't pick up her head from Buckys neck so he doesn't take it as refusal. "I'm gonna take that as a yes. Cos I'm pretty sure you're getting tired of just us, and need that extra person to keep up with you." Bucky chuckles, "just like your daddy aren't you, always need to be kept busy or you get yourself into no good. I hope your heart will be just as big as his, but I have a feeling it would be, my sweet girl."
Evelina babbles something against his shoulder and Bucky can feel her restless energy, wanting to be let down to play, and walk and crawl. Bucky swings her in his arms to hear her laugh. She giggles maniacally, and Bucky smiles.
What he wouldn't do for her.
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Okay, so maybe “oh my god we’ve made a baby” sex is just them in missionary position. But it’s Bucky’s favourite way of having sex, especially when Steve’s nose brushes against his, and they’re just staring at each other before Steve presses down to kiss him, and kiss him and kiss him. Steve kisses him like nothing else, kisses him until his breath stutters, and Bucky has to turn his face because the sheer amount of love between them in that moment is enough to overwhelm all of his senses and everything becomes too much in the best way
"Best congratulatory baby making sex ever." Steve says, after they’ve both finished with a happy sigh, head resting on bucky's hip, just below the tiniest swell of a bump. Probably not even the bump, probably just from Bucky’s love of food and lack of limitation on any snacks. ‘Cause he damn well will eat whatever he wants whenever he wants, health be damned, his abs are far from gone but Bucky sees no need or rush to jump back into that vigorous training.
"You say that after every sex making for a reason sex." Bucky giggles, running loose fingers through Steve's hair, too sexed out to move.
"Yeah but," Steve lifts his head to look at Bucky, "this was just exceptional." He presses a kiss to buckys hip and then nuzzles it.
"C'mere." Bucky asks.
"Miss me already?" Steve teases. Crawling his way back up before he kisses the response out of Bucky.
"Mm, I love having a baby that sleeps the majority of the night."
"You're telling me." Steve replies. There's a beat of silence where they both share knowing smiles, "it'll change soon enough." Steve rubs small circles on buckys abdomen, where their little Rogers-Barnes 2.0 is growing.
Steve reaches over by their night table, grabs for the cocoa butter and proceeds to complete their nightly routine, rubbing cocoa butter for the tiny swell of a baby bump, Bucky is sure it's more for Steve than him, neither of them care for stretch marks, the bump won't feel tight for another several months, Bucky lets him, maybe it's a way for the super soldier to decompress, he's not gonna question it, a free massage! Who's Bucky to complain about it! "Hey bumblebee, it's your daddy," kiss, "just wanted let you know that your papa," kiss, "daddy," kiss, "and sister," kiss, "love you so very much. We can't wait for you to come and -" oh and that's another element of it, Steve talking to the 'bump', Bucky smiles as he listens to Steve's soliloquy to little Rogers-Barnes 2.0.
Bucky stops listening because Steve is a sap, he's sure their baby in there is listening away, Evelina doesn't listen to it as much anymore, Steve still tells her everyday though, how much he and Bucky love her, so patient with this little madam of theirs.
Maybe this new baby of theirs will be calmer, the presence after a thunderstorm. Will they be just as independent as Leela, or will they be more needy, will they be just as mischievous as Leela or will they be more mellow.
Bucky figures there’s no need to compare, no matter how their child turns out to be, it will be their child, a product of their love or whatever crap Steve says. It's their spawn regardless, Bucky will love them for all and everything they are. Only hopes that they have the same patience and kindness his husband has when in the face of adversity, as it was the very patience that saved Bucky. Multiple times.
Bucky links his and Steve's fingers together, and Steve finally finishes his waxing poem to Buckys stomach- he'd finished rubbing cocoa butter a while ago- and kisses his way back up buckys body. They could probably go for a round two, but Bucky really just wants to cuddle with Steve and let the night wash over them.
And that's what they do, Steve cuddles up behind Bucky, resting their linked hands over 'the bump'. Steve murmurs his sweet nothings and Bucky tells him he loves him. Because that's what they are now, an old sappy couple, Bucky sighs happily, what being married has done to him. His 20 year old self would laugh, but secretly it’s something he’s desperately craved deep down, he’s so glad he’s got to live the life he’s living. Bucky let's sleep wash over him, lets Steve’s strong arms around him ground him, just the thoughts of him Steve and their growing family in his mind.
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