Archive of Our Own ^beta

Why Saiki agrees to go on yet another trivial, annoying escapade with his classmates is beyond him. The glare from his mother bores into the back of his head. If he rejects the six individuals standing at his gate, there is going to be a demon waiting for him the second he closes the front door. The last thing he wants to do is upset her. Reluctantly, he pulls together whatever senses he has left and leaves his home. So much for a quiet night. He didn’t know all of them would try to take him to the fair.

The bustling in the street is enough for anxiety to settle in and never disperse. It’s so damn loud even though he can’t hear a single thought. The Germanium ring resting around his middle finger is more of a familiar comfort now. It could also be called ignoring reality. He doesn’t care for the crowded setting, but no one is really paying attention to him. That may be the only positive thing in this whole situation.

It doesn’t matter that he can’t listen to the thoughts of Kaidou, Nendou, and Kuboyasu. Their excitement for the fair/festival event is audible, pointing out everything they want to do tonight. Yumehara, Mera, and Teruhashi flock together, gossiping about the latest school news and of course, boys.

That’s where Saiki’s whole predicament of not being able to use his telepathy becomes a problem. He just knows Teruhashi is going to try something to be alone with Saiki. Hell, she may not even have to do anything. The odds are always in Teruhashi’s favor. He really has no chance of getting out of whatever is going to happen. He couldn’t do it with his powers. How can he possibly expect a great escape without anything coming to his aid?

And as if a majestic being had snapped their fingers moments ago, people begin dropping out of the picture. A shady man shoulders Kuboyasu without a second glance. Obviously, he does not take this lightly, saying he’ll be right back. The demented look in his eyes is worrisome. Yumehara once again attempts to seduce Kaidou. By some miracle, it actually works. They leave hand in hand, a prominent blush visible on the pair as Teruhashi goads them on to do couples activities. Mera overhears Nendou talking about a ramen vendor that is supposed to be the best. As per usual, Nendou expects Saiki to come along. Nendou is his savior! A tiny and hopeful smile plays on Saiki's lips, preparing to amble in whatever direction they need to go. That is, until Mera seizes Nendou’s shirt, literally lugging him through the dirt and demanding he take her to get that ramen. They’re gone in a second.

Low and behold, Saiki is alone with Teruhashi.

“Wow, Saiki-kun! It looks like we’ll have to explore the festival ourselves!” Teruhashi beams. “It seems like forever since the last time I saw you!”

No kidding. It’s not like I’ve been avoiding you or anything, he thinks to himself.

This is some sort of sick joke. It’s very possible that Teruhashi put the girls up to the task of taking advantage of Kaidou and Nendou. The incident with Kuboyasu is completely coincidental. Seeing as he still hasn’t returned, Saiki gives up on hoping for anything good happening to him tonight. Whatever superior being controlling their fates is on Teruhashi’s side. Why does he still not understand that fact? Or rather, why is he not accepting it?

Saiki doesn’t respond. His neutral, uninterested expression remains as he surveys the area. Seeing everything normally is definitely something he’s taking for granted right now. It even makes the act of going out appealing when he doesn’t have to see walking meat-sacs or skeletons every few seconds, not to mention the green-tinted world he used to live in. It is a bit too warm for his liking, aware of the sweat accumulating all over his body. Gross. Cryokinesis is much needed right now. If only he could use telepathy for a second to get a glimpse of what the girl floating beside him is planning now.

The cheerful atmosphere doesn’t compare to Teruhashi’s brilliance. Everyone standing around her has their eyes locked on her. The number of offu s is astounding. It’s way too much attention. His breathing accelerates. How can these people be even louder than what his telepathy was? They seem so close. How can one girl thrive off of so much attention every single day?

Saiki slinks away from the horde, but he doesn’t calm down. What’s the big deal? Is there too much going on for him? He can never shake the feeling that something bad will happen to him. It’s so likely, especially in this kind of setting. There are plenty of sickos out there, and now he can’t pinpoint them. At least he’s gotten better at not jumping when he’s addressed by someone he knows. The shouts from vendors into the crowds aren’t so bad because it’s directed at everyone. The whole vibe is chipper. There are smiles and laughter everywhere. They are all having a good time without a care in the world.

Yeah. Okay. This isn’t so bad. He can breathe easy again. His prior annoyance in situations seemed to shift to apprehension without his reliant powers. He’s grown used to avoiding attention, so it’s no wonder that he was distressed.

“Saiki-kun!” Teruhashi calls out for him. Good grief. He can’t ignore her or the wrath of all of these people will fall upon him.

Saiki turns around and catches sight of the young beauty. It’s not an understatement. Kokomi Teruhashi is truly the prettiest girl Saiki has ever seen. The one thing he can’t allow to happen is for her to find out. Of course, she already knows this fact, but admitting it to her after disregarding her for so long makes all the difference. Her attitude has become more genuine when it concerns her friends, as well, and it is admirable. His face feels abnormally warmer than the rest of his body as she approaches him, locking her dark blue eyes onto his purple ones.

She can’t possibly fathom the predicament he’s in, so he spells it out for her.

“I don’t like the scrutiny from all of these people,” Saiki says, turning away from her. It would be nice if it didn’t feel like he’s on fire.

“I’m sure they’ll leave us alone if we walk away,” Teruhashi chirps. She grabs onto Saiki’s arm and weaves through the mob of bodies. He looks away, trying to examine which retailers have worthy desserts to try while ignoring the grip on his arm. Quite bold of her, if he has anything to say about it. He can’t deny the flush that has completely overtaken his face any longer. He knows it isn’t pyrokinesis, but he forces his mind to think it is. He must look like a fool.

How everything just works out for Teruhashi is something Saiki is envious of. It’s like they are invisible to everyone now. Does she have some sort of attraction power she can turn on and off as she pleases? This certainly is not the first time they’ve been out and she doesn’t receive attention. They stop, and he stands by, unamused. It should be clear in all of his body language that he is not enjoying this.

Teruhashi is audibly nervous. She keeps stuttering over her own words as she considers where to go. Her feet shuffle in the dirt, and her hands are stiff against his arm. It’s apparent she did that impulsively when she rips her hands away from him and takes one step back, spewing out excuses and even an apology for the contact. It seems she hasn’t mastered playing it cool in front of Saiki as she can with everyone else. In a way, he likes that fact.

No, why does he like that fact? The most annoying and pompous girl in all of Japan is stuck on him. She is indeed pretty, and her selfish intentions have quelled the last few times he was able to read her mind. Still, Saiki understands that while she flaunts perfection, no human is capable of being flawless. She gets really damn close, and it is enough to fool everyone else. It’s effortless to do so when all they can see is her fraudulent modesty. To give Teruhashi some credit, she’s a lot better than when he first met her.

This is the dangerous part. Saiki may just grow fond of the young woman if she keeps cornering him like this. The more time people spend together, the more comfortable they get. It’s a given fact. Seeing as every male (and many females) have fallen for Teruhashi, it’s only a matter of time before Saiki is next. His abilities had served as a barrier for petty things such as friendship and romance. He can now see people as they are. He doesn’t have negative thoughts or ulterior motives bombarding his head every second of the day. These had been effective reminders to not get tangled in any of that. Prior knowledge will only help him so much from now on. Actions speak louder than words, and it is now the only thing he is going to get from her.

Saiki has already seen changes in his life. Though his father still irks him, he smiles a bit more around his mother, finding that the loving woman does indeed make him happy. Similar feelings arise when he eats whatever delectable meals she prepares or when he so much as thinks about coffee jelly. As much as he hates to admit it, the company of Nendou and Kaidou, his two longest-known acquaintances, is comforting. It’s... pleasant, really, the closeness of a few people that aren’t family to begin with that understand and respect each other. The reliability and trust they put in each other are preserved and valued. Their silent devotion to keeping that intangible idea of intimacy alive is a choice they make every day, and it only becomes stronger when they spend more time together. There seems to be a lot of effort put into “friendships”, and thinking about it this way is exhausting.

“Oh, look here!” Teruhashi’s voice pulls Saiki from his speculations, once again taking his arm and forcing him to follow her. He never thought that he’d contemplate that much over the generic concept of friendship, let alone recognize his own feelings.

Teruhashi takes him to a sweets vendor that is nearby. Her charm earns them a multitude of snacks for a hundred yen. It’s surprising that this isn’t a form of robbery. Saiki accepts them, his mood lifting from the chaos earlier. Head empty, only sweets. He finds he has the decency to smile as he eats. If this is how Teruhashi wants to treat him, he wouldn’t mind. He narrowly misses her victorious smirk as they make their way to do something else, and he lets out a sigh. People don’t change in an instant. Too bad desserts are Saiki’s weakness and she knows that.

The sun rests on the horizon, bathing the scenery in golden-orange rays. Anticipating the night, several lights begin to flicker on. The ruckus makes it easy to overlook the sunset. Shades of red, pink, and violet fan out of the sky, quickly overtaking the dazzling blue. The clouds compliment the changes, reflecting colors only possible in these moments. They dance around the sun’s last dying minutes of the day and fade to a dull indigo when the gaseous plasma finally vanishes. It isn’t too long before the empty sky is teeming with luminous, twinkling entities.

If there is one thing Saiki has always appreciated, it’s this. The simplicity of a beautiful sunset, or the intricate ways a star burns and exists. It’s fascinating how many stars can come together to form patterns, whether they be one or a billion light-years away. There is so much more out there than Earth itself, and the unknown is tantalizing to an all-knowing being. He never dared venture out of sight of the planet he calls home no matter how interesting it would’ve been to explore space. He didn’t quite have the perseverance to do something so bold, and it would take a lot of time.

Saiki notices Teruhashi watching him. The second he does, she looks down at her snack before nibbling on it, a light blush on her cheeks. She can only be daydreaming, about what he isn’t sure. His only thoughts are how to get out of this as soon as possible before she can act on anything else. He bites into a candy apple, trying not to think about what could happen if she gets her way again. Though the temperature has cooled and became pleasantly warm, a sudden flush heats his face and moves down his spine. He can’t help but shudder for a second at the feeling. Is something wrong with him? He hasn’t gotten sick post-powers yet, but he may be coming down with a fever right now. He doesn’t know what being sick feels like, and he doesn’t really want to experience it.

“What would you like to do, Saiki-kun?” Teruhashi asks. “I got to pick first, so now it’s your turn!”

There really isn’t much variety for what to do. As long as they stay far, far away from the Ferris wheel, he doesn’t care what they do. He points to the one where a ball is thrown a couple of times to knock some bottles over. Of course, this kind of game is at every corner, and they’re all rigged.

“Ooh, okay! Can you please win me that big one?” Teruhashi pleads, pointing at the biggest, most generic stuffed bear anyone could come up with. Saiki glowers at the bear, instantly regretting his choice as the sleazy man running the joint takes interest in them. Not only does it look cheap, but it’s not cute. What is it with women wanting these stupid carnival prizes?

Saiki sighs and gives the man his money. Teruhashi squeals with excitement and observes him from the side. He gets three balls total to knock down three jugs. It seems simple enough, and it’s something he’s dealt with before. The weight is mainly focused on the bottom, making them harder to knock over. The bottom ones are likely filled with something to make them even heavier. Their central mass would then be lower than what’s perceived. If he can aim it just right, he can get them in a single shot, meaning the big prize. Maybe she’ll leave him alone after that. That is enough for Saiki to take this seriously. Taking the first ball, he inhales and prepares to throw.

The ball lands on the ground, three-quarters of the way to the jugs. So maybe he doesn’t know his (lack of) strength very well. It must be a habit of holding back like he was forced to do every day with everything. He can get the next shot with more natural force. Teruhashi stands aside, more embarrassed than Saiki himself is. Good, maybe she’ll forget about him.

Saiki picks up the next one, feeling a little more confident. Now he knows what he’s working off of. There’s no way he can miss his target. He aims, throws. The ball veers to the left, not even close to the jugs. At least it traveled farther this time. He just didn’t let go of it soon enough. Teruhashi remains silent, and a quick glance tells him that her grin is strained. It’s truly a talent that anyone else would see her as normal, but it is easy for Saiki to observe the subtle changes in her body language thanks to his telepathy in the past. Trying not to lose it, he imagines. 

Everything is in this last ball. It’s not even a big deal, but he would be a little upset if he paid for a game only to walk away empty-handed. It’s true that he is ambidextrous, but he’s always felt more comfortable with his left hand. As a kid, he liked the idea that he was special for using his left hand, seeing as nearly all of his classmates were right-handed. A normal thing to fawn over rather than his actual powers.

Saiki gets a feel for it, tossing it into the air a few times. He will not make the same two mistakes. 

The ball is thrown. It quickly approaches the jugs, right down the middle! His aim is a bit high, though. It grazes the bottle, making it sway precariously atop the other two, before settling down again.

He didn’t even get one. It’s not humiliation he feels, but irritation. No one wins these beguiling games. The sound of the man trying to convince them to try one more time only vexes Saiki more. He walks away without a word in return, half-hoping the girl won’t follow.

Of course, she does. He knows she’s pouting silently, but her good-girl face is still on display. She gets optimistic at the sight of different, equally rigged games. Saiki fails just as much then as he did in the first game. Ring toss, balloon busting, luck, fishing, races, strength test, he couldn’t win anything . It’s only when an exasperated Teruhashi suggests they move away from the games onto something else, evidently disappointed in him. For some reason, he also feels disgruntled about it, but only because this made him realize he had grown obsessively reliant on his powers to do a lot of things.

There aren’t many options left for teenagers, seeing as most activities are designed for children. They do manage to find a few things to do that don’t earn them strange looks from the operators. Teruhashi flatters herself with jewelry, attracting more attention than Saiki prefers. He samples sweets from around the world, once again brightening his mood as they were all delicious. She picks out a shirt from a traveling merchant that intrigued her. The rest is just observing the dying crowds of the remainder of the festival on a soft patch of grass, Teruhashi making idle chatter. Saiki nods along but finds himself speaking to her at times, too. The responses are concise, but it’s more than what he would ever give her. She does have interesting things to talk about. 

Thinking about it, he never has had a real conversation with Teruhashi. Not with real words at least, but using telepathy straight into her brain doesn’t feel like a real conversation, especially when he would cut it short to avoid her. It is different to speak using his voice but in a good way. What’s happening right now is good. He watches Teruhashi laugh at something he said, and he feels the need to look away. His face gets warm again.

Saiki can’t deny it anymore. Whatever Teruhashi is doing needs to stop, and the only way for that to happen is for him to leave. It’s late enough to make the excuse, isn’t it? Half of the people are gone, mainly the children and their parents, and many vendors are packing their things as well.

A silence lays between the pair. It’s his chance to go home, he just has to say the words and it’s over with.

I'm going home.

That's all he needs to say. She'll understand. She won't try to stop him because she's already spent so much time with him this evening.

I should be heading home.

He just needs to say the damn words. It's not like he did anything worthwhile. His performance during the games was embarrassing.

His gaze rests on the stars, pondering the mysteries of the universe in the back of his mind.

It's late, I have to get home. Goodnight.

Say it. There isn't much time left. She's going to break the comfortable silence first. She'll ask him to do something because he isn't saying he wants to leave.

He glances at her and finds she is already staring at him. He needs to say it now. His heart thumps abnormally loud in his chest.

It's getting kind of late. I have to go home soon, but I had a good time with you tonight, Teruhashi-san.

Telepathy doesn't work anymore. He needs to leave right now. He needs to communicate those words to her with his mouth.

"I know it's getting late, but I would like to go on the Ferris wheel before we leave," Teruhashi says with a soft voice, tearing her gaze away from Saiki in a red blur. Her hair follows her sudden movement, flowing graciously as it manages to fall over her shoulder and cover her rosy face. She’s beautiful .

Oh, shit, no! He can’t shake his head to decline because she isn't looking at him anymore. Forget telepathy, he can’t project his answer to her. How is he supposed to turn that down? He feels like he should look away, but something is prompting him not to. 

"Okay," says Saiki. His mouth is dry. He forces his eyes to inspect the ground in front of him. He can't help but notice his foot rocking back and forth. Why the hell did he say that instead?

Teruhashi explodes with excitement next to him, startling him with the short, high pitched scream that came out of her. He can’t help but gawk at her, at first wondering if danger had caused that fit. She hastily gets on her feet and composes herself from her hysterical outburst, a blush visibly creeping down her neck. The sight makes Saiki smile for some odd reason. He chooses to ignore it, opting to observe the glimmers of light above him as he forces his face to return to its natural sober expression. He stands anon so the situation doesn’t get more awkward. If only he had pockets so his hands could take refuge in them. They dangle at his sides, but he keeps them close to himself so she doesn’t have a chance to yank on him again.

Saiki leads the way to the accursed wheel of trouble. That’s all it’s going to bring if they go into the tiny compartment and shoot into the sky. There’s a good chance Teruhashi will want to profess her love when they are in there. It’s a romantic set up, and he walked right into the trap.

They arrive all too soon. There is a line as the patrons wait for the laps to finish, but it’s short enough that they will get on next. Virtually everyone is a couple. Is that Kaidou and Yumehara?

It definitely is, and they are holding hands at the very front of the line. Kaidou seems a lot more relaxed than before, confident even. Saiki doesn’t really care whether or not those two actually end up together. He has his own issues to take care of. As long as Teruhashi doesn’t see the affectionate display, she won’t get any ideas. Problem is, she already caught sight of Yumehara. They make bizarre facial expressions and signal to each other in their silent girl language but seem to understand each other perfectly.

Trouble awaits the post-psychic. He has no idea what the hell they just communicated, but it’s enough to make both of the girls bloom a rosy shade, giggling at one another.

Before they know it, the line dwindles as the couples load into the cars. They reach the front, and Saiki steps in first. He idly sits on the bench, not paying mind to what’s going on. The less he interacts, the better. He needs to get this over with.

Teruhashi chuckles nervously as she boards but doesn’t sit down immediately. She’s just standing there, holding up the last few people trying to get on. He casts her a look as if to say what’s going on. Maybe her girl language can pick up on what he’s getting at.

“Is it okay if I sit next to you?” stammers Teruhashi, absentmindedly tucking her hair behind her ear. Saiki stresses internally. There’s a perfectly well other-side of the cabin she can sit in, why-

Now he knows why she asked, and he doesn’t blame her. The bench opposite is crusted over with what appears to be melted ice cream and other liquids, topped off with crumbs and trash from festival foods. Absolutely disgusting. Do they never clean these things? Saiki wouldn’t want to sit over there either. So, to be courteous and to get the eyes from the remaining people off of him, he reluctantly scoots over to make enough room for her to sit on his left. Of course, it’s a rather small space, so even when his side touches the wall, her thigh still brushes against his.

Someone, or something, hates Saiki Kusuo’s existence.

The wheel rattles upward to allow the next pair onto the ride. The close proximity is a bit discomforting to Saiki, but nothing he can’t manage. At least he’s handling it better than the girl sitting next to him. Still, the air is palpable with awkwardness as neither teen knows what to do now. He would be just fine basking in the silence, albeit an uneasy one. It creaks up another level. His hands lay idle in his lap, occasionally touching the ring on his right hand.

“You seem to like that ring a lot. Did you get it from a family member?” asks Teruhashi, disrupting the quiet around them. Of all things, Saiki would not have guessed that Teruhashi would talk about his Germanium ring. It’s such an insignificant thing that most people don’t even notice it. No one knows it used to block his telepathy, which had been a blessing and a curse. That theme followed with the entirety of his abilities, however. The cars jerk up once more.

“Something like that,” Saiki muses, studying the metal band. “It’s special to me.” This is true. It holds sentimental value. He couldn’t bring himself to throw it away after he eradicated his powers.

Teruhashi giggles. “That’s cute. In a good way, I mean! Like how you appreciate the sunset or sweets. The little things, you know?” She is tense, staring hard at the mess in front of her with fists in her lap. Saiki didn’t believe this girl to be that perceptive. It’s almost touching, knowing she put in the effort to understand these things about him. He remembers that she can do the same thing for anyone else to get her way. It doesn’t prevent a small smile from etching his lips. He’s sure she can’t see, but he nods in agreement.

An announcement plays over the speaker, reminding passengers to keep all limbs inside the cabin at all times. The remarkably steady and gentle rhythm of spinning in slow circles ensues. It is much quieter than before. They get a good view of the abating fun below as they rise higher into the sky. It’s astonishing how small everything looks, the people below as well as the stars above.

“You’re doing it again,” Teruhashi states. “Appreciating what everyone else takes for granted.”

Finally existing as a normal being? Of course I would appreciate that. Not that she’d get it, or anything. Saiki chooses to pay attention to Teruhashi rather than the enigma that is the universe. How can she read him so easily now?

She simpers, playing with a strand of hair. She can’t manage eye contact. “It’s admirable.”

Saiki is much obliged by the authentic compliment. He is a bit shocked that she finds something like that attractive. What would Teruhashi know about “little things”, surrounded by hundreds of people every day and getting whatever she wants from them? Perhaps that in itself is the reason why she respects it. She is unable to cherish them with so much going on.

Saiki had been the exact same way with his powers. It is hard to appreciate things when they can be obtained so easily. He got anything he wanted with just a thought. His main focus was blending in. Everything else was irrelevant. As long as he was out of danger, he didn’t care what happened.

Now he recognizes that his mother is even more cheerful than before (he's sure she is happy that she doesn't have to keep that burdensome secret anymore). It’s one of the more favorable aspects of losing his powers. Adjusting to this lifestyle is the only detriment. He still struggles with social situations that have practical, straightforward explanations - such as right now. Does he say thank you or return the compliment? His answer used to depend on what the other was thinking. Unlike him, everyone else has had interactions since birth and they must rely on that to respond with something appropriate. He finds himself helpless when he can’t solve a problem. It leaves him feeling rather useless and pathetic, needing to receive help from others.

There’s no one here to help him out of the plight (that he caused) this time. He still hasn’t said anything in return. Surely that would be unacceptable if anyone else were to see what’s going on, but then again he doesn’t know. He considers doing what he usually does: ignore her. It’s worth a shot. It may just send the message that he is completely uninterested. But… could he even reject her at this point? He’s already been staring at her for far too long after her words and he can’t seem to find the willpower to look away. Has he really gotten that much weaker?

"Can we hold hands, Saiki-kun?" Teruhashi asks suddenly, braving herself to look into his eyes. The dazzling blue cuts right into him. If only she could turn to stone right now with his stoic, purple eyes. Of course, she doesn't. His breath hitches in his throat from the intensity.

Everything is playing by her book now, isn’t it? This must be the point of no return because Saiki cannot comprehend what the word no even means. He silently holds his hand up toward her.

What is he doing? This will surely be an invitation for her to pull something bolder in the future. She would undeniably get closer to Saiki, meaning his secret would be in danger. He would prefer to keep the past in the past as he did with all of his other mishaps. Though he can’t use his powers anymore, it still is shameful to know he had been capable of so much and couldn’t let anyone know about it. All the trouble he’s caused, intruding on their privacy and interfering in ways they wouldn’t understand. He had failed to tell them on that day. As the days pass, he finds that it’s weighing on him more and more. Saiki very much enjoys a private life, so imagine someone coming along and telling him they saw and heard everything, down to what he’s thinking at every second. Talk about unsettling. It wasn’t fair not to tell them, but he needed more time, just to ensure this new life is permanent. So far, it seems to be. He knows that day is going to have to come soon. He doesn’t want to think about it.

Likewise, Saiki cannot have all of that attention on him. Just think of it, the prettiest, most perfect girl with an average guy like Saiki? The school would go insane, not to mention the death threats he would get from other guys. He wouldn’t be able to defend himself if something extreme were to happen. He lucked out with the bookcase incident because Nendou was there. But what about any future assault? Not to mention outside of school, too. Any wrong move and Teruhashi’s admirers would destroy him. Makoto would be a pain in the ass. His own parents would be a pain in the ass.

Saiki doesn’t even know the first thing about dating, let alone liking someone. What indicates liking someone? How does he know? What should he do? Should he just stray away from it as much as he can? Does that break some sort of social rule? 

Saiki’s thoughts race and his heart pulsates heavily against his ribs as Teruhashi takes his hand. The action is gentle, their forearms brushing against each other with fingers intertwining. Her hand is small and soft in his, but deathly still as if moving even a millimeter would make him recoil. It feels wrong in a way, almost forced. He understands that they both need to relax or this is going to end up a hell of a lot more awkward than it needs to be. A good first step is to not have their hands uncomfortably suspended in the air.

Saiki draws their hands onto his left thigh, squeezing the tiniest bit to hold his own nerves together. This is the most intentional physical contact he’s had with a woman that isn’t his mother. Teruhashi does seem to find relief in the action. She had probably been worried about rejection, even though he offered his hand first. Her thumb grazes his skin in a tender and deliberately slow back and forth motion. The gesture is so small, yet it sends a tide of warmth throughout his body. This is a good feeling. It’s like when he eats coffee jelly. How can two things that are so drastically different elicit similar reactions to his body? He doesn’t fight the smile that appears but tries to not let her see it by turning his head away again.

The cars jerk to a stop, leaving the cabin swaying in the air. It seems the thrill is over. The silence between them is more bearable, maybe even pleasant. Teruhashi is still caressing his thumb up until the moment they are about to get off. Saiki untangles his hand before the door flies open for them. His hand is sweaty from the contact, and it’s kind of revolting to think about. She quickly pulls her hand inward to herself then makes an effort to exit. She is a bit flustered, but at what point was she not tonight? He has to evaluate the same question for himself, however.

Just how much did Saiki fuck up?

He finds the girl speaking to Yumehara. “Eeeee! Finally! ” She shrieks while jumping up and down, a bright smile on her face.

Good grief. Someone already knows of their intimate moment. Just how long until the entire school finds out? That girl would prattle all night long about everything. Saiki might as well be counting down the days to his death.

"You did what? " Teruhashi gasps, certainly surprised about something Yumehara told her. The girl in question appears proud, yet embarrassed. Kaidou stands by in a daze, his mouth gaping open and as red as the candy apple Yumehara is munching on. When did she even get that? An astonished Teruhashi returns next to Saiki after another girly conversation filled with obscure hand signals and squeals. Even if he could, he wouldn't want to listen in. Her shock and Kaidou's reaction either means BJ or first kiss. He desperately hopes it's only the latter for many reasons.

There’s been enough excitement for one night. Saiki begins the trek to Teruhashi's house with her in tow. It’s rather late, so it would be dangerous if she walks home alone. At least, that’s what he tells himself. He stares straight ahead. Their footsteps echo noisily as he tries to sort out what exactly happened tonight.

That’s the real question. What happened? How could he have been so compliant to the only girl he’s actively tried to avoid? He can’t deny that he was fond of the affection, but that’s exactly the problem. Why did he allow any of this to happen? It is sure to stir up more trouble in the future, and now he’s going to deal with the consequences.

Why do all of those issues seem insignificant at the moment?

They arrive at Teruhashi’s gate before Saiki can dissect his inquiries. She turns to him, for once seeming bashful, and she smiles up at him. It’s a genuine smile. Her eyes are soft, and the moon’s beams shine on her in such an amazing way that makes her already dazzling aura seem even more perfect.

“I had a wonderful night, Saiki-kun,” Teruhashi says, playing with her sleeves. “Thank you for sticking with me. I hope you had as much fun as I did. And I hope it was okay that we held hands.”

Saiki merely nods, blushing the tiniest bit, and he’s glad it’s dark out. He still isn’t sure how he should feel about all of this. She is slowly but surely getting into his head. He isn’t sure how to feel about that, either.

“I did tell Chiyo, but I told her not to tell another soul. I don’t want to make you uncomfortable in any way.”

Teruhashi sure has a funny way of executing that statement. Does she seriously still not understand that Saiki strongly dislikes attention and that she is a magnet?

“But I hope we can hang out again soon! It doesn’t have to be grand or anything. Maybe we can just get coffee somewhere?”

That’s a fair start if she truly wants to be around him. He nods again. A brief silence ensues. He figures it’s time to leave and turns, but she starts speaking again. It’s so soft, like an angel’s voice.

“Do you think we could hold hands again, Saiki-kun?” Teruhashi nearly whispers. It’s enough for him to hold his breath.

He should say no. He needs to in order to properly reject her. He shouldn’t have spent so much time with her tonight, and he shouldn’t have held her hand. He shouldn’t have done a lot. And yet, with all of these rational thoughts, he couldn’t help but think about how tonight’s experiences made him feel like an actual person. He’s finally grasping onto what it’s like to be ordinary. That’s all he’s wanted in life, isn’t it?

Saiki turns to face her. Her expression is almost pleading, eyes wide with the fear of rejection, yet a strong smile decorates her lips. If there’s one thing to be impressed by, it’s her dedication to always reflect positivity on those watching. It sure is working, even on Saiki. He can’t fathom what she’s thinking right now.

“Yes,” he answers. Any doubts the girl held seemed to ebb away as her face softens into one of genuine happiness. Before he could react, she takes a step toward him and kisses his cheek. She hastily backs away and wishes him a good night, stumbling through the gate and into her home. The door slams shut.

Saiki stands dumbfounded, his mouth hanging open. He brings a hand up to the spot where her lips grazed his skin, touching it lightly. It still tingles a bit. Her lips remind him of rose petals. Such forwardness was not expected. Overwhelming emotions strike him, and he twists around to hurry home. He has no choice but to accept how warm and agitated and embarrassed he feels because of her. It does nothing to calm the storm raging in his head.

With everything that has happened tonight, Saiki has made it even more important that he never says offu to Teruhashi.