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Tommy this, Tommy that. Of course it was all Tubbo talked about, because besides Schlatt, home, and daycare, Tommy was all Tubbo knew, all he had.
Tubbo got so excited when he would talk about his friend too. Schlatt would sometimes have to tell the kid to take a damn breath because he was almost running out of air half the time- practically hyperventilating. Schlatt was happy for the boy of course, but in all honesty, he didn’t really know who his kid was talking to. He had never seen Tommy’s dad, never talked to Tommy… besides, like, at Tubbo’s birthday party.
So you could imagine Schlatt’s hesitation to bring Tubbo to the kid’s house.
Yes, Tubbo had asked if he could have a playdate at Tommy’s house after his birthday, because apparently that was all Tommy would talk about at the daycare. How many toys he had, how big his house was. If he were talking to Schlatt about that, it would annoy the shit out of him. Then again, Tommy was just a kid… why wouldn’t he talk about the stuff he had?
“He plays music on his music box!” Tubbo would enthuse all the time.
Schlatt couldn’t say no, he just couldn’t, no matter how much of a hardass he wanted to be. Because if he did, the look on Tubbo’s face would probably crush him into dust. He never wanted to make Tubbo sad intentionally, and if he denied him going over to his friend’s house, he knew it would make the boy sad. Tubbo wouldn’t complain, but he’d probably sulk the rest of the night.
He said yes. Despite not even knowing the kid’s address.
Schlatt had called Quackity about it after Tubbo had gone to sleep, dialing the phone with a glass of whiskey in his hand.
“Dude, just tell Tubbo to tell Tommy to tell his parents or whatever to give him their phone number, and then Tubbo can get the number from Tommy and give it to you.”
It was a very confusing sentence, but the duck made a point.
So that’s exactly what Schlatt told Tubbo to do. And the plan worked, obviously. Written in a bit of chicken scratch was:
Phil: (xxx) xxx-xxxx
Alright, Schlatt thought, the number was obtained and now all he had to do was call Tommy’s parents. Or parent.
...Call… the parent. Oh dear fuck, Schlatt had never talked to another dad before, at least none other than Wilbur, but they were friends first. What if he sounded fucking stupid, and Tommy’s dad called him out on it? What if he could already tell Schlatt was an alcoholic? What if he could practically smell the fucking whiskey through the phone? Worst of all, what if he called the wrong number? Oh no, no no no. This could be bad.
But then he thought of his son, and how happy he would be if none of that happened, if he didn’t call the wrong number and if Tommy’s parent actually liked him. Tubbo would be overjoyed, he would be so happy. It warmed Schlatt’s heart just thinking about it. When he was Tubbo’s age, he didn’t have any friends at all because any friend he got, the friend’s parents would meet his parents and well… it never did end great. That’s why Quackity was extra special, because he didn’t ever care, and neither did his mom. Then again, middle schoolers don’t really care about that shit, and he and Quackity needed each other. It was that simple.
He needed to do this for his kid.
He sucked in a breath, and dialed the number on the small piece of paper.
“Alright Tubbo, I’ll be staying too,” Schlatt was saying as he was driving the car to the destination. Tubbo was bouncing in his car seat. “Just to make sure you don’t pull anything stupid.”
Tubbo was humming along to the 80s punk rock music that was playing in the car. At least Schlatt was doing something right; the kid knew his music.
Schlatt couldn’t help but be wary. This could all be a trap to turn him in or some shit, maybe that Phil guy or whoever wanted him dead, he didn’t know. He had meant to call Quackity before they left, to maybe ask him if he wanted to come, or to get some advice, but it slipped his mind- it’s hard to focus while your kid is running around shouting “Where are my shoes?”
That and… well, he really wasn’t great at talking to people he didn’t know. He would probably say something really stupid, in fact he was counting on it. Quackity being with him usually racks his confidence up a shit ton, for some reason, but right now that wasn’t the case. It’s easy to play off of someone- Quackity was really good at talking, and he knew Schlatt wasn’t really. They joked that Schlatt could never become a dictator of some sort, that he was too afraid to speak up. Schlatt always joked with himself that he was capable of anything as long as Alex was there- not in a manipulative way, but rather like a small stone that a child would call “lucky.” A token.
There it was, the house of the address. And sure enough, it was huge. No wonder Tommy talked about it all the damn time to Tubbo.
It looked to be just two stories tall like Quackity’s mom’s house, but it was very wide; there had to be quite a few rooms in there. And this is when the man started to worry.
You see, he and Tubbo lived in a one bedroom, one bathroom house. No dining area- he had to make one in the kitchen, and the living room could only fit a couch and a chair in it to go with the small TV that was on the fireplace. Without the fireplace and the electric heaters they obtained themselves, the place would be cold as hell, and even with the heaters, Tubbo had four blankets he slept with. He had a few toys from the years and friends that Schlatt had, and a majority that he had were all hand-me-downs, or from second-hand stores- the only toys he had that weren’t second-hand were his bee (which he had with him on his way to Tommy’s house) and the toys Karl made him. He knew Tubbo didn’t brag about his life, there was no way.
Schlatt parked the car, and he saw the front door open before he turned the vehicle off. There was Tommy, standing there in his usual clothing- red shirt, jeans- with a ginormous smile on his face. Schlatt jumped as his kid screamed from the backseat.
“Tommy, Tommy, Tommy!” He shouted, and Schlatt put a hand to his head. This would be what the next few hours would consist of.
Once he got Tubbo out of the car, the kid just barely grabbed his bee before he darted towards Tommy, and he tackled the boy to the ground in the grass. They burst out into a fit of laughter and started shoving each other playfully. Schlatt continued his walk to the front door, and before he could get up to the doorstep, a man with almost-shoulder-length hair walked out of the wooden frame. He was dressed in green robes- he looked very approachable. What Schlatt failed to notice at first though were the giant wings attached to the friendly-looking man’s back- they were huge. It seemed like one could just smack Schlatt into an oblivion. Damn, there were a lot of hybrids in L’manberg these days.
He looked a bit older than Schlatt, and he looked so tired, as if he had a bunch of kids. Who knows? Maybe he did.
“Uh, hello, I’m-”
“Schlatt! Welcome,” the man, who was probably Phil, stepped forward and engulfed Schlatt in a hug. Schlatt didn’t know how to react, but before he could think, Phil was stepping away.
“It’s nice to meet you. Tommy talks about Tubbo all the time, it’s about time you and I meet.” Phil smiled, clapping his hands together.
“Oh, yeah, I agree. Tubbo talks about Tommy just as much… kinda annoying sometimes.”
Schlatt bit the inside of his cheek. Was that stupid? Was Phil going to think he was a bad dad now? He finds his own kid annoying?
“For sure, it can definitely be difficult to live with.” Phil just laughed, looking over at the boys who were now smearing mud on each other’s faces.
He just… laughed? No- he even agreed?
“Boys, stop playing in the mud!” Phil called, pulling Schlatt from his brief thoughts. “Come on inside. Tommy, you can show Tubbo around.”
“Okay! C’mon, Tubbo. I can show you my room!” Tommy sprinted towards the door and Tubbo followed.
“Please, come in. I’ve made tea.”
Schlatt wordlessly followed the man into the house and closed the door behind him, watching his wings intently.
“So… those things. Do you fly with them?” Schlatt blurted, immediately wanting to smack himself in the mouth afterwards.
“My wings? Oh, sure. Only sometimes though, I don’t need the military coming after me as an ‘unidentified object.’” Phil chuckled.
“Right right,” Schlatt nodded coolly. “Um, do you ever take people on… rides?”
Phil looked at him and laughed. “Rides? I’d be too afraid to kill someone. I used to do it in high school, though. Accidentally dropped a friend into a lake. He was fine, just a bit dramatic.”
“Ah.” Schlatt acted like he didn’t want to hear more, but in reality, he wanted to sit down on the giant, fluffy leather couch and listen to the man tell stories like that all day.
“Do take a seat. I’ll get our tea. The boys will be just fine on their own, I trust Tommy enough.”
“Yeah well, the two of them together are like fire. It’s fucking crazy.” Schlatt sucked in a breath. “Oh, sorry for the language, if you-”
“It’s fine, really,” Phil said from the kitchen, a laugh bubbling from his throat.
Schlatt took in his surroundings. Of course, he was sitting on the giant couch mentioned earlier, and around him were two loveseats of the same design, same color. In the middle of the room was a glass coffee table, and it was spotless, only covered in drink coasters- one of which had a plastic cup of half-drank orange juice. A TV that was just average size stood on the electric fireplace- it looked like it wasn’t used often. A simple TV in a large house- obviously the man could afford to buy a flatscreen, but the fact that he didn’t said something. And Schlatt was right- there was a stash of newspapers in a bin next to the fireplace on the floor. Photos lined the wall- of what, Schlatt didn’t know yet- and a small, spiral staircase led up to the second floor. Schlatt could only see the living room from where he was, but he was sure every other room was just as massive.
“And this is my favorite stuffie! Her name is Clementine.”
Tommy walked around his room, showing Tubbo everything he could think of. Right now, he was holding a stuffed animal of a moth.
“Clementine? I like that name. I have him.” Tubbo held up his bee to his friend.
“What’s his name?”
Tubbo thought for a second. He hadn’t… actually thought of a name for the bee. It was just… his bee.
“Hm, I don’t have one for him.”
“That’s okay, you’ll think of one somedays.” Tommy smiled, and continued walking around his room. “I gots brothers, you know.”
“Brothers? Really? Where are they?” Tubbo asked, bouncing on his feet as he looked at Tommy’s bunk bed.
“Oh, they don’t live here anymore. But that’s me ‘n my older brother Wilbur, and my dad’s student that we called Techno.” Tommy was pointing up at a picture that was hanging on the wall in a frame. There was who he mentioned as Wilbur with Tommy’s dad behind them, holding a tiny baby. Tubbo could only assume that the blonde baby was Tommy. In a picture beside it was a single pig-hybrid, holding a sword that glistened in the light.
“Wow, that’s a lot.” Tubbo turned to Tommy after a moment. “I wish I had brothers.”
“You can be mine!” Tommy flopped onto his bed, facing Tubbo.
“Does that work?”
“Why not?” His friend shrugged. “It worked with Techno.”
“Oh, yeah! Okay! I’m your brother now!”
“Yay!”
“This house… it’s huge. And it’s just you and the red kid?”
Schlatt was asking a shit ton of questions, much of which he was embarrassed by. But Phil didn’t seem to care that much, or if he did, he had a great way of hiding it.
“Oh, no no. It’s that way now, but a few years ago I had a full house. You see, I foster kids without homes… they come here seeking refuge. Every now and then I’ll find kids on my days in the woods, and I’ll offer them a place to stay for as long as they need. None of them have really stayed, though. They’re usually troubled teenagers when I find them. Only a couple stayed, and now I have Tommy. I found him when he was a baby. Loudest cry I’ve ever heard.” Phil ended his spiel with a laugh.
“Ah, so the government helps pay for all this class?” Schlatt motioned to his surroundings.
“In a way I suppose it does, but I mostly carry the weight myself.” Phil nodded. “I know a lot of people, a lot of people know me. I don’t really work, I just help people out. They just happen to pay me remarkable amounts of money, even though I don’t need it at all. If it was up to me, I’d be doing everything for free. But I have a family, and a big one every now and then. So it helps.”
Schlatt hummed, taking a sip of the tea. Tea was not his thing, but he didn’t want to be rude. “The kids that stayed… where are they now?”
“Well, one ran off after high school. Him and my other son were very close. He was my student first, though. He just slowly merged into the family I suppose. My other son I found as a young teen, wandering the streets of an unknown county that I was sent to one year. I took him in when I found out he was homeless. And my third is Tommy, who, well, you know. Just last week a couple other kids stopped by, stayed for a couple nights.”
Schlatt replayed the story in his head- that sounded awfully familiar.
“Uh, sorry for asking, but what are their names?”
“Wilbur and Techno.”
Schlatt’s world seemed like it was so incredibly small in that moment. Phil… he was that Phil? The Phil that Wilbur Soot, his high school friend, would talk so highly of? And Wilbur Soot… was the older brother… of his son’s best friend? That’s-
“Crazy. Fucking crazy.”
“Pardon?”
Schlatt realized he had spoken out loud.
“Oh, sorry, I’m just… Wilbur… he was one of my best friends in high school. I had no idea you were the Phil he was talking about all those years. I can’t believe I never went to his place. I guess it was always Alex’s.”
Phil raised his brows. “Really? Wow, that’s quite incredible, I didn’t know you knew my son. Well, my older son.”
Schlatt laughed, shrugging. “Yeah, we saw each other again not that long ago. I can’t believe he has a son now.”
“I know, it’s wild these days.” Phil smiled, drinking from his tea cup.
“Techno… Wilbur was so close to him. What happened? Do you know?”
Phil took a breath. “Well, no, not really. I woke up to Wilbur shaking me and telling me that he was gone. I assured him that maybe he was just out hunting, but when days passed and he never came back home…”
Phil looked down.
“Obviously he had a better calling. I taught him to seek out his story, and he must’ve done so. Do I miss him? Yes, but he wasn’t wrong for leaving. I know I’ll see him again.”
Schlatt nodded, taking in Phil’s words of wisdom. No wonder Wilbur had the views that he did on life; his father was as great as the words he spoke.
“Tommy, you got such a big house.”
The boys were sitting at Tommy’s coloring table that he had in his play area in his room, coloring in coloring books. Tommy was much better at coloring in the lines than Tubbo was.
“Yeah, but it’s scary. So dark at night. My dad’s so far away.”
“Oh, my papa just sleeps on our couch, so all I have to do is go to the living room and pat his face if I gets scared.”
“All the way down stairs?”
“Huh? I don’t got stairs, Tommy.”
“Oh. What does your house look like then?” Sure, Tommy had been there before, but only once for Tubbo’s birthday, so he didn’t quite remember.
Tubbo thought for a moment before he started to scribble on a piece of paper, drawing boxes and such.
“I have my room, the bathroom, the dinner room, and the living room! And sometimes Uncle Quackity comes over, and he plays with me!”
“Awww,” Tommy pouted. “I don’t have an Uncle Quackity.”
“I can share him with you!” Tubbo smiled.
“Okay!” Tommy nodded excitedly. “What else you got?”
“Well, Papa also has a car, and I have cool block toys that Uncle Karl gave me! I can share him, too.”
“Cool!” Tommy reached behind him. “I have play swords!”
Tubbo’s eyes went wide and he grabbed one that Tommy was handing off to him, and they stood up, ready to fight to the “death.”
“Dear god, it’s already almost 4:00?”
Schlatt glanced at his watch and his eyes went wide. No wonder he had a fucking headache- he had gone practically all day without a drink. And he wasn’t about to ask Phil for one.
“I know, the time flies when you’re talking about the difficulties of raising a child,” Phil laughed.
“Well damn, I guess I should scoop my kid up and get home. I think my friend Alex is gonna come over later.” Schlatt stood up from the couch and nearly fell over as he put a hand to his head.
“Are you alright? Would you like some water?”
“Oh oh, I’m just fine. Uh, where would the little maniacs be?”
“Here, follow me.”
Phil led Schlatt up the spiral staircase and brought him to one of the many doors that had a sloppy sign that said “Tommy’s Room.” Phil opened it and looked around.
“Tommy? Your friend has to go home now.” He spoke to thin air. The kids were nowhere to be found. A panic rose in Schlatt’s chest.
“Tubbo? C’mon bud, we gotta get home. Uncle Quackity is waiting, probably,” he tried, to no response.
The men stepped into the room and in a blink of an eye the boys sprang out from the closet, swinging their foam swords at Phil and Schlatt.
“Woah!” Phil pretended to fall to the floor. “Nice job, Tommy.”
“Am I just like you?” Tommy grinned up at Phil, holding his sword to his chest.
“You’re getting very close.”
Schlatt was almost distracted from the foam hitting his leg before he looked down to see his little ram boy going ham with the toy sword, giggling maniacally. He was wearing a plastic helmet that covered his eyes. Schlatt bent down and picked the boy up.
“Nice one, I guess. A bit weak.” He teased, pushing the helmet above Tubbo’s eyes. The boy was still giggling, and he hit Schlatt on the head with the sword. “Maybe I should teach you sword fighting.”
“Ooh! I wanna do sword fights!” Tommy jumped up and down, tugging at Phil’s robe.
“You’re far too young right now, Tommy. Maybe someday, though.”
“Well Tubbo, say bye to Tommy. We gotta get home.” Schlatt set Tubbo down and Tubbo ran up to Tommy and gave him a big squeeze.
“Bye Tommy.”
“Bye Tubbo.”
Once they said their goodbyes, Schlatt thanked Phil for allowing them over and Phil said they were welcome back anytime. He loaded his kid up in the car and off he was on his way home with Tubbo asleep in the car almost the whole way there.
“He’s Wilbur’s dad, Quackity! He’s his adoptive father, and he also fathers Tommy! That’s fucking insane!” Schlatt was explaining the day to Quackity, going over everything he and Phil talked about while Tubbo went and played with Tommy.
“That is definitely insane, what a small world, huh?” Quackity shook his head. “I wonder why Wilbur doesn’t visit more, then.”
“Maybe he does and he just didn’t know we were here this whole time,” Schlatt shrugged.
“Papa?”
The men stopped talking and looked over to see Tubbo standing next to the coffee table. Damn, Schlatt didn’t even realize he was there.
“What’s up, kid?”
Tubbo ran up to Schlatt and gave him as big of a hug as he could. It took him a second, but Schlatt wrapped his arms around his kid as well.
“Thanks you for not putting me in a big house.”
Schlatt quirked an eyebrow. “Huh?”
“Tommy saids it was scary there. And that he had to go all the way to his dad to get help. But you’re right here, and it’s not scary anymore.” Tubbo’s voice was muffled as he hugged his dad tighter. Quackity stifled a laugh.
“Oh, well uh, sure, of course.”
Tubbo felt safe? With him there? In the house? Schlatt figured that the boy would want to live at Tommy’s place, that he would want all the toys Tommy had, that he would want all of what Phil could offer as a dad. But clearly that wasn’t the case.
He was happy with what he had, even though others had more to offer. That made Schlatt feel just a bit better about himself.