Chapter Text
(T.w mentions suicidal thoughts)
(2 months before graduation)
Darryl:
I get out of class and sit at the lunch table next to Zak in the same place that we normally do and a6d should be here soon as well.
While Zak was handing his notebook and me responding to what he wrote I started thinking about him. I have known Zak since the day he started here 2 years ago because he moved here a little over a year after his dad died. Zak and I's friendship is strong and we communicate a lot so sitting at the lunch table passing a notebook back and forth is not out of the normal. He doesn't talk because he is selectively mute. I guess he has not spoken since his dad had died in a car accident. So I guess he has not talked for almost three and a half years now which is sad I don't know what I would do if I was in his situation. I would also often go to his house. Zak and I communicated a lot he probably knows me better than my own parents. His mom said that I am the only one who he has really opened up to. It is sad though because other students make fun of him for being mute. It honestly makes me mad any time I think about it I mean Zak means everything to me. I don't know what I would do without him.
I stop my train of thought when Zak tapped me on the shoulder and handed me the notebook so I could see what it said. Are you ok you looked like you were going to cry? I looked up at me with a sad expression and I said, "I'm fine don't worry S'geppy". He seemed to smile shyly at the nickname I had given him a while back.
Zak moved over closer to me and slowly wrapped his arms around me pulling me into a hug. I hugged Zak back trying to ignore the blush rising to my face.
Zak pulled away from the hug and wrote on his paper, Are you better now? I nodded my head and said, "Yeah sorry I was just thinking about something." Luckily a6d showed up before Zak asked what I was thinking about.
I wish I did not blush when I hugged him. But I have come to terms with my feeling about Zak so I am going to have to deal with the fact that he will probably never like me back. But out of every boy in the grade to have a crush on I rather it be Zak than anyone else.
I sometimes wish that I was able to tell Zak how I felt but I know he won't return it so what is the point? I mean there is a chance he likes me. I don't want to get my hopes up though. Zak is my best friend and I would be afraid to lose him because he means the world to me. He is also the only reason that I have found a will to live he doesn't know but before we met I was suicidal I don't even like to remember it. Luckily for me though Zak has never seen nor questioned about it and I plan to keep it that way.