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Kang Yuchan was not exactly the most handsome person in their campus. With a university as big as the one Seulmi was studying in, there were many undiscovered gems and she often saw them in the library or the restaurants she went to for lunch. But even with the many more handsome men she saw, no one had held on to her attention as Kang Yuchan did.
Who was Kang Yuchan?
Seulmi would tell whoever was asking the basic information she had on the man. He was a Communication major and he was in his sophomore year. She shared a few classes with him like Ethics and Philosophy, so she had chances to talk to him. She remembered the first time she talked to him was when they were groupmates for a paper but they talked solely on their groupchat. They did not talk a lot personally, especially that Junhee, a junior who was also taking up the same Philosophy class as they did, was the middleman.
So Yuchan became an unattainable dream for Seulmi.
She did not get why she was even that weak for this man. Sure, his eyes sparkled like the stars and his smile equated to a million suns but that did not mean anything. It was unreasonable but Seulmi had to accept that feelings are unreasonable.
It was another day in her Philosophy class and luckily enough, Yuchan was seated in front of her, along with his other friends. Because of that, she could not focus at the lecture but rather, on how Yuchan’s nose crinkled whenever he laughed or how he whispered lowly in order not to get caught by their professor. While Seulmi was deep in thought, Yuchan suddenly turned to her and noticed her stare.
“Um, hi?” Seulmi said in an almost whisper as she gave a small wave. She expected for Yuchan to smile at her, like he always did, but instead, the man winked at her before turning his attention back to the old man preaching about Confucius in front of their class.
Wait a minute.
Did Yuchan just wink at Seulmi?
Seulmi wanted to confirm it from Yuchan but she knew it was embarrassing to ask about that. It was also odd. Why would she need to clarify if Yuchan winked at her after all? That would expose her true feelings for Yuchan and she did not need to have that in her life.
After class, as Seulmi was putting her notebook and ballpens in her bag, she was surprised to hear Byeongkwan, another classmate of theirs and a common friend she had with Yuchan, calling her name.
“Seulmi-ah,” Byeongkwan said as he sat beside her,” I have someone to introduce to you.”
“Introduce to me?” Seulmi raised her eyebrow,” If it’s another one of your dance teammates again, I’ll—”
“No,” Byeongkwan snickered,” I think you’ll like this one.”
“Like?” Seulmi sounded invested,” Why do you say that?”
“Because you were staring at him earlier,” Byeongkwan had a teasing tone in his voice,” You thought I wouldn’t catch wind? We’ve known each other since we were freshmen.”
“You saw that?” Seulmi pulled Byeongkwan closer and whispered,” Did he see that? Oh god, the embarrassment will kill me.”
“And if you’re wondering if he did wink at you,” he smirked,” He did. I told him to do that to get a response.”
“Oh god, how long has Yuchan noticed—wait, does Yuchan know about my—how did you know about my—”
“Seulmi,” Byeongkwan laughed, patting Seulmi’s back,” We’re in college. Your moves are more of… high school girl level? Why not approach Chan and ask him out?”
“Shut it,” Seulmi shot him a look,” I can’t. I don’t want to get rejected—”
“Hyung, what’s taking so long?” Yuchan suddenly stopped by the table where Byeongkwan and Seulmi were talking,” I thought you’ll be quick? We have to line up for those waffles you know.”
“How about we bring Seulmi along, Chan?” Byeongkwan offered,” I mean, if it’s okay with you.”
“Why wouldn’t it be?” Yuchan pouted for a second before flashing one of those smiles that Seulmi liked. Seulmi felt like her presence was unwanted and shook her head. It seemed that Yuchan preferred to spend time with his guy friends only, not with a classmate he rarely talked to.
“It’s okay, Kwan,” Seulmi squeezed Byeongkwan’s shoulder before standing up,” I’ll be revising my notes in Café Clover today so… I don’t have time to line up for waffles.”
“Alright,” Byeongkwan shrugged. He knew there was no use forcing Seulmi to come with them.
“Café Clover?” Yuchan asked,” Do you go there often?”
“Yeah,” Seulmi stood up,” I prefer studying in a café than in a library so… I’ll be seeing you tomorrow, I guess? For Ethics?”
Yuchan nodded. Seulmi showed a small smile before she went on her way.
“You screwed up, Chan,” Byeongkwan scoffed when he confirmed that Seulmi was out of the classroom,” Why can’t you even ask out a girl that you like? Seulmi won’t reject you, I’m sure of that.”
“Just cuz,” Yuchan shrugged,” Things would be awkward if I did…”
Seulmi did not notice the time pass by but when she checked her phone, it was already 3 PM. She had another class by 3:45 PM so she had to wrap up the notes that she was doing. She stretched her arms for a moment when she noticed a familiar face waltz into the café.
“Yuchan,” Seulmi softly said as if she was confirming who the person was with herself. Yuchan looked around the room, his eyes squinting as if it was difficult to find the person he was looking for. When his eyes finally matched Seulmi’s, he hurried towards her table.
“Seulmi.”
Seulmi felt her pulse quicken when she heard Yuchan call her name. She looked up to him and showed him a small smile, like the one she showed him earlier in class.
“You were looking for me?” Seulmi asked. Yuchan nodded before he placed a plastic bag on the table.
“I thought it was a shame that you couldn’t come so I bought one for you,” Yuchan said as he sat on the chair across Seulmi,” I hope you don’t mind. Hyung doesn’t know I bought one too.”
“That’s sweet of you, Yuchan—”
“Chan,” Yuchan inhaled,” You can call me Chan if you want.”
“Okay then,” Seulmi felt shy as she pulled the plastic closer to her,” Chan.”
“That’s it,” Yuchan sounded proud,” so umm…”
“Hm?”
The two of them were obviously shy around each other but no one else was there to save the conversation. Yuchan slightly regretted not telling Byeongkwan about this.
“I… er…” Yuchan opened his mouth but nothing coherent would go out. Seulmi was the same but she chose not to produce any sound or she would look stupid in front of the guy she liked.
“Seulmi, perhaps, er, were you staring at me earlier?” Yuchan finally asked. Seulmi’s eyes widened before she looked down.
“I mean, Chan—I can explain, I—”
“I didn’t hate it,” Yuchan intercepted her. Seulmi wanted to confirm if Yuchan did wink at her earlier. It was not weird to be winked at, to be honest, but that body language meant that Yuchan had the slightest interest in her…
Right?
“What?” Seulmi blinked a few times when she realized what he said.
“I didn’t hate being stared at… by you,” Yuchan had a small pout on his lips as he admitted that,” Seulmi, um, actually…”
Seulmi did not want to assume anything but was this a confession. She looked at Yuchan. He was avoiding eye contact with her. His cheeks and the ends of his ears were red. His lips were slightly pouting as if he was resisting the urge to smile or to frown or anything.
“Actually?”
“Actually, I,” Yuchan gulped,” BK-hyung did not tell me that this was difficult.”
“What is?” Seulmi asked.
“I want to ask you out, Seulmi,” Yuchan finally blurted out. Seulmi’s heart stopped.
What?
Yuchan was asking her out?
Was this a dream? If it was, Seulmi never wanted to wake up.
“Seulmi?” Yuchan snapped his fingers in front of her,” I know we don’t know each other well but I think you’re really nice and BK-hyung said I should go for it because he said I stood a chance and—”
“Chan.”
“Huh?”
“Why are you more nervous than I am?” Seulmi said as she fiddled her fingers,” I actually… I like you.”
“Wh-What?”
There it was again. That bright smile. Seulmi was weak once again.
“So how are we… what are we?” Seulmi asked,” I mean, umm… We don’t know each other well.”
Yuchan winked as if that held the answer but Seulmi felt like she understood what he meant.
“We can avoid putting a label on it for now,” Yuchan answered,” but I’d like it if we do soon.”
“What label?”
“Boyfriend-girlfriend,” Yuchan smiled at Seulmi as if he was sunshine personified. Seulmi wanted to melt in front of him but she could not. She continued to watch Yuchan as he talked to her before the alarm on her phone rang.
“I have to go to class, Chan,” Seulmi said as she stood up,” I guess this is a see you later?”
“No,” Yuchan said as he took Seulmi’s bag from her,” I’ll walk you to your class.”
“How sweet,” Seulmi mused with a smile on her face, not knowing, that for Yuchan, her smile was his sunshine too.