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Seijoh’s first practice match of Kindaichi’s second year had been… interesting to say the least. He doubted anyone thought much of it, but there was one new piece of information that occupied nearly all his thoughts.
Kageyama and Hinata were in a relationship.
Kageyama was gay.
And… barely anyone even bat an eye, and if they, it was more of a “weren’t they always fighting? I thought they didn’t like each other,” than a “he’s gay?”
Kindaichi’s first thought when he found out… well he wasn’t proud of it. He kicked himself for being a bigot, even if it was just internally, and his thoughts quickly became replaced with totally different ones.
Understanding and… jealousy.
He had no right to judge Kageyama when he… well he kind of—
“Kindaichi, come on,” Kunimi snapped him out of his thoughts for a moment. “We need to go change. Is something wrong? Your brow was furrowed more than usual.”
“I’m fine,” Kindaichi said, standing up quickly. “Just upset about losing.”
“Okay,” Kunimi turned and headed off to the club room, not bothering to see if Kindaichi was coming.
Which he was. He was always going with Kunimi.
He let himself get lost in thought again. He understood Kageyama because, well…
Because he was in love with his best friend. His friend who, just like him, was a guy.
And oh yeah, he was jealous. Jealous of Kageyama for having a boyfriend when he himself had barely even accepted the fact that he wasn’t straight. Jealous of his team for being so perfectly accepting.
It’s not that Seijoh wasn’t. In fact, he was pretty sure there were feelings there between Oikawa and Iwaizumi, though he had little idea what had become of their relationship after graduating. It was more like… the general feel of the team. They wouldn’t have a problem with someone on the team being gay (or bi, or whatever), at least not in an outright homophobic way, but they would probably be uncomfortable with the idea of that person changing with them in the locker room. If there was a couple on the team, they wouldn’t really know how to act about them, unlike Karasuno who was so natural about it.
At least that’s what Kindaichi guessed. He would never know unless… but he wasn’t even close to being ready for that.
“Kunimi,” he finally spoke up once everyone else had left.
“Hm?”
“I was just wondering… about Kageyama being gay and stuff…”
“What about it?”
“Well it’s just… I don’t know. I mean, we changed with him for all those years and stuff and—”
“I swear to god, if you say something homophobic.”
“No!” Kindaichi put his hands up quickly. “No. I just more meant, I don’t know, if the thought of that made you uncomfortable or something.”
Kunimi shrugged, “It’s not like I care. As long as he wasn’t thinking about me in weird ways—or even if he did, it’s not like he acted on it or anything—it doesn’t really matter to me.”
“Okay,” Kindaichi nodded, a little relief flooding into him.
“Why? How about you?”
Suddenly, some of his panic returned, “Oh, I was just wondering. I feel about the same way as you. It doesn’t really matter.”
Kunimi looked at him skeptically as they gathered their bags. As they started heading out of school, all was silent like it often was between them, until Kunimi finally went, “You know, there’s nothing wrong with you not being straight either. If that’s why you were asking.”
Kindaichi froze.
Kunimi continued, “I just mean that no matter what your sexuality is, the team won’t treat you any different, so don’t worry about it. They're not the type to judge, at least not about stuff like that. Honestly, I don’t think half of them are in the position to judge.”
Kindaichi cocked his head, “What do you mean?”
Kunimi thought for a moment. “Remember that once when Iwaizumi-san had scratches on his back? And Oikawa-san was all sore? And how Iwaizumi-san seemed mad at him for a specific reason, but not angry like when he would throw things at Oikawa-san?”
Kindaichi’s jaw dropped, “You don’t mean—seriously?”
Kunimi shrugged, “It’s not like I know for sure, but it wouldn’t surprise me one bit.”
Kindaichi sighed and looked forward into the night. So Kunimi officially didn’t give a shit. He was about 90% sure two of their teammates who had changed with them everyday the previous school year had had sex with each other and couldn’t care less. So that was… good news for Kindaichi. Right? Because Kunimi would be fine with his feelings? Well at least the him liking guys part. The him liking Kunimi specifically part… who knows.
They walked in silence a little longer, breathing in the night.
“I don’t think I’m straight.”
Kindaichi turned to Kunimi in surprise.
“I don’t really know. Bi? Pan? Gay? Ace or demi? I haven’t thought about it too much, but I’m pretty sure I’m not straight.”
Kindaichi nodded and turned forward again, “I don’t think I’m straight either.”
And that was that.
—————
Think , Kindaichi laughed to himself as he lay in bed that night.
Yeah, there were a lot of things he thought about. He thought about what it would be like to hold hands with Kunimi as they walked home together. He thought about Kunimi’s rare smile, and how it gave him butterflies. He thought about the times they had fallen asleep on the bus against each other. He thought about what their relationship might be like if it was… different. He thought about other things too, though not often, and he always felt incredibly guilty. Even if it was something as simple as imagining a kiss, or pulling up a mental image of Kunimi in the change room.
There were a lot of things he thought . He didn’t think he wasn’t straight though. He knew.
It was just a whole lot easier to say he thought though, to make it seem ambiguous, rather than come out there right on the spot.
There was another thing he knew, now more than ever.
He was hopelessly in love with Kunimi.
If someone asked him why, he wouldn’t know what to say. Most people probably just saw Kunimi as this antisocial teen who didn’t care, and didn’t try any harder than was necessary. Some average looking person with average level talents. They didn’t think much of him.
To Kindaichi though… he was talented. And in Kindaichi’s mind, he was so adorable. He was a good person to be around. He was an easy person to talk to. Kunimi was someone who he could understand, and who understood him, even if they were quite different at times. No matter what his feelings were, the two of them were a team.
Except it did matter. It did matter, because now more than ever, now that Kindaichi knew Kunimi wouldn’t be bothered by him liking guys, he couldn’t stop the flood of his feelings.
The flood of the comfort of hearing Kunimi’s voice. The accomplishment of winning a game with him, beyond the usual excitement. The butterflies at his cute face. The warmth of being near him.
Now he was thinking about the feelings all too much, and he wasn’t sure he would be able to push them down.
—————
The next day, he survived. The only difference, really, Kindaichi rationalized when he woke up, was that he was now fully aware of his feelings rather than just partially or denying them. That was it. Knowing he had a crush on Kunimi was nothing new. Their conversation last night wasn’t a big deal. Everything was normal.
And it was fine.
—————
Then lunch came, and he got a text. It was to their team group chat from last year. A text from Oikawa, who must have caught word of their practice game, asking how it went. Asking if there was anything new about Karasuno.
It wasn’t a big deal, and by the time lunch had ended, Kindaichi was able to push down the thoughts swelling up again, but still.
Hearing from Oikawa after what Kunimi had brought to his attention last night was… weird. Like seeing him in a different light. Then there was the whole aspect of wondering how he would react to finding out Kageyama and Hinata were dating.
Maybe he would think about it later. Maybe he would even talk to Oikawa about it. That had to wait for home though.
Luckily, he didn’t think about it again. One less thing to contemplate and stress about.
—————
Day two. Locker room. He was about to start changing, and Kunimi came in.
That’s when things got a little more difficult. Kunimi slumped down on the bench beside him and leaned forward, resting his forehead on Kindaichi’s shoulder.
Well this was certainly new.
Kindaichi tried to keep his heartbeat and voice in check as he asked, “Something wrong?”
“Mmm,” Kunimi groaned against him.
“Tired?”
Kunimi nodded.
Kindaichi lifted his hand up and hesitated before patting Kunimi on the head, “We got to get changed for practice.”
Kunimi made another sound in protest. Kindaichi felt his heart squeeze. Why is he so cute? Is this even allowed?
Then Kunimi did just about the absolutely worst thing he could have done for Kindaichi’s racing pulse. He pulled away and turned a little, then leaned back so his head was resting on Kindaichi’s lap.
Kindaichi tried to avoid his breath hitching. He looked down at Kunimi. He. Looked. So. God. Damn. Cute . Kindaichi tried to keep his cool and suppress the red.
Kumini opened his eyes and looked back up at him. Kindaichi was frozen. Kumimi’s eyes narrowed, more scrutinizingly studying than simply tired now, and Kindaichi felt a slight panic build.
Kunimi reached up and poked his hair, “Why do you style it like this?”
Kindaichi blinked, thinking about his upright “turnip” hair style, “Uh, dunno. Just cuz?”
“Hmm,” Kunimi seemed to take great consideration of this.
“Why?”
“No reason,” Kunimi said, poking his hair again. Then he booped him. Like actually booped him, right on the nose.
Kindaichi short circuited, and to his relief, Kunimi sat up before he could react.
It took him a few seconds to get his breathing back to normal before he could start changing.
The tip of his nose tingled, sending flushed feelings all through his body.
—————
A week since the game. A week of things getting a little harder for Kindaichi. A week of acting like everything was perfectly normal while on the inside he was trying not to blush at simply being near Kunimi.
If he avoided him though, Kunimi would think something was going on. Besides, it’s not like he wanted to avoid him. He just wished he could feel as normal as he tried to act. Like his best friend wasn’t giving him heart palpitations.
“Hey,” Kunimi poked his shoulder.
Kindaichi scooted over and made room for Kunimi to sit next to him. Kunimi sat down and pulled out his lunch. The two sat and ate together like they did every day.
“You’re always zoning out lately,” Kunimi said bluntly. Kindaichi acknowledged him, trying not to show any panic. “Is everything okay?”
“Yeah,” Kindaichi sighed. “I just have a lot on my mind.”
Kunimi shifted, slightly uncomfortable. He had trouble with social situations, even with Kindaichi sometimes. “Well if you ever need to,” he paused vaguely for a moment, “talk or whatever.”
If you ever want to talk about it, I’m here.
Kindaichi always knew what he was trying to say. “Yeah,” he nodded, “I know.”
Kunimi put a hand on his thigh, meant as comfort. Kindaichi inhaled sharply for a moment, then tried to let out a deep breath to calm himself. It was as shaky as his heart rate.
Kunimi noticed his unease and pulled away, “Sorry.”
Kindaichi shook his head, “No, it’s fine. I—I don’t mind. Thank you, I appreciate it. And I’m okay, by the way. Just thinking about things.”
Kunimi nodded in understanding and they continued their lunch as usual.
—————
Another week down the line. Kindaichi was sitting alone on the stairs, Kunimi being out sick. He could have stayed in his classroom and ate lunch with his classmates, who he was at least sort of friends with, but he didn’t feel like it.
Someone came from behind him and sat down on step beside him with a grunt. He turned. “Kyotani-san?”
Kyotani hid his face in his hands, “ Men. ”
“…Men?” Kindaichi cocked his head in question.
“Men,” he repeated. Then Kyotani turned to look up at him, “Can I… can I ask you something?”
“Uh, sure,” Kindaichi put his lunch down beside him. This was certainly strange. For Kyotani to come to ask anyone anything, much less for their advice which was what this seemed like, was already out of character for him, but add on top of that that Kindaichi was his kohai just made it weirder.
Kyotani sighed. “I’m new to the whole making friends thing,” he started, “but I’m trying. I’m trying to get along with the team. But Yahaba! He’s so annoying! And acting all high and mighty! And sometimes I just want to punch that stupid smile off his face or kick him into a wall, but then other times—” something seemed to crumple inside Kyotani. He buried his head in his hands again, “Sometimes I want to kiss him. I feel all flustered and blushy and my head gets filled with–with things!” He groaned and slumped over more.
Oh. Oh , Kindaichi thought. Men, men indeed. “I know what you mean,” he said. “Well not about Yahaba specifically, or the kicking him into a wall part, but… yeah.”
Kyotani nodded to him in acknowledgement, “Someone on the team?”
“Yeah,” Kindaichi leaned back, his elbows propped up on the higher step behind him.
Kyotani sighed and the two sat their in their gay crisis in silence for a long while. Finally, Kyotani spoke again, “I think I want to tell him. I don’t know how, and I don’t want things to go badly, but I feel like he should know. Even if things don’t change, or we get all awkward, it feels almost like lying to not tell him about this”—he waved to the air vaguely—“whatever it is. Crush? Absurd feelings that make no sense? But I’m scared.”
It was so weird to hear him saying this stuff. Kyotani didn’t talk, but here he was being so open with Kindaichi. Kindaichi thought for a moment. “I think you should,” he said carefully. “Knowing Yahaba, no matter how he feels, he won’t cut you off or judge you or anything. With the two of you, I don’t think there’s really anything to lose. Just be honest and tell him what you want and I’m sure it will turn out fine.”
Kyotani nodded, talking his words to heart. Then, “What about you?”
“Me?”
“The person you like. Are you going to tell him?”
“Oh, um, well…” after what he had just told Kyotani, Kindaichi thought about it for a moment. What was the worst that could happen? Knowing Kunimi, he would continue to be his friend no matter what. Just like he had told Kyotani, it would be fine. “I don’t know. I guess I didn’t even really consider that. I’m scared to ruin our relationship, and it’s really important to me. But I guess… I guess, knowing him, even worst case scenario isn’t all that bad.”
He felt Kyotani’s eyes on him. “Friday.”
“What?” Kindaichi looked over at him.
“We tell them by Friday.”
Well this was happening now apparently. “Okay.”
It was Tuesday.
—————
Wednesday morning, and Kunimi was back, good as ever after his little sickness episode. It was nice to have him back, even if it had only been a little while, but Kindaichi couldn’t help but feel a little nervous and on-edge after the agreement he had made with Kyotani the day before.
How did you even tell the person who you’ve been best friends with for four years that you’re in love with them? How do you bring that up? How do you bring such a different thing into a stable relationship like that. Dump that information in front of the other person and hope for the best?
He could hardly focus on morning practice.
“Kindaichi!” Yahaba called. Yahaba. Yahaba , who was going to be confessed to by Kyotani by the end of the week. Who was completely unaware. Just like Kunimi. And there went the thought spiral again, except Yahaba pulled him out of it for another moment. “Are you okay? Why don’t you take a break, you seem really distracted today.”
“I’m fine!” Kindaichi said quickly. Even if he was still lost in thought, volleyball was helping distract him at least a little. A little bit, but an important bit. But then the coach was calling too.
“He’s right. Why don’t you come sit down for a bit? Clear your head?”
No. No, no, no, no, no. Sitting down would force him to be stuck in his own thoughts. Sitting out would remove his distraction. It wouldn’t clear his head. It would overload it.
But Kindaichi had to listen to his coach, so he made his way to the bench. His coach handed him a water bottle, patting the bench beside him, “What’s wrong?”
Kindaichi took a long sip and sat down, “I just have a lot on my mind is all.”
“Like?”
Kindaichi gripped his water bottle tightly.
“Sorry, sorry, I won’t pry,” his coach put his hands up in surrender. “Just whatever it is, figure it out before the inter high preliminaries start, I want you on your best game. I’ve noticed you’ve been a little off lately, not just today. Since the practice game maybe? Don’t worry, one loss isn’t a huge deal. You just have to work hard to beat them next time.”
Kindaichi wanted to argue that that wasn’t what it was, in fact, losing the game had barely crossed his mind, but he couldn’t come clean about what it actually was, so he just nodded.
Friday. He had to tell Kunimi by Friday. Then maybe he would be able to focus.
How though? The pressure started crashing in on him. How would he tell Kunimi? What would become of their relationship? He trusted Kunimi, but what if he did push him away? What if things got weird and they drifted apart? Kunimi was the most important person to him, and he couldn’t stand the thought of that.
The spiral. Down, down, down, into the whirlpool of his thoughts. Suddenly, it was like his throat was closing up. Tears welling. Heart racing, beating, needing more space than his chest could provide. Kindaichi wiped his palms on his shorts. His hands were shaking.
He couldn’t stay here, on the bench, in the middle of practice.
Was this what a panic attack felt like?
Before he knew what was happening, he was walking out of the gym to the locker room. His mind was in a dazed panic as he hurried to the club room, shaking. He felt like his insides were tied to a string connected to his body, and he would just float off if not for that string.
As soon as he made it to the room, he slumped against the door and slid to the ground.
Deep breaths, he tried to tell himself as he fit his head between his knees. Deep breaths. He tried to, inhaling deeply and letting it out slowly, but it was shaky. It felt like he wasn’t getting enough air. In, out. In, out, he thought, but it didn’t do much.
A minute later, there was a knock on the door. “Kindaichi? It’s me.”
Kunimi.
“Can I come in?”
Kindaichi shifted away from the door and managed to get out, “Yeah.”
The door opened and a moment later, Kunimi was in front of him. “Are you okay? What happened?”
“I think—” Kindaichi took a deep breath, “I think I’m having a panic attack.”
“You—what? Uh,” he could sense the gears turning In Kunimi’s head. He wanted to tell him not to worry. “Hey, it’s okay. Um, one second.” He disappeared and returned a moment later with water. “Here, drink. Deep breaths, and take a sip of water.”
Kindaichi nodded and took the water from him. Kunimi sat down beside him and put an arm around him, rubbing his shoulder comfortingly. “It’s going to be okay.”
His calm voice provided as a certain kind of anchor for Kindaichi. He listened to the soft words Kunimi mumbled, and leaned into him, his heart rate finally calming down.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
Not yet , alarms went off in his head. Not ready yet.
Calm , he reminded himself, talking another steadying breath.
He shook his head, “No. I mean, not right now. But… I’ll tell you what’s going on. Soon.”
Kunimi continued rubbing circles on his back, “Don’t force yourself. Just… if you need me, I’m here. You know that, right?”
There was almost… hurt in his voice. Whether it was because he felt he couldn’t help or thought Kindaichi didn’t trust him, Kindaichi wasn’t sure, but he hated hearing it. “I know,” he said, and he meant it. “I know.”
The rest of Kindaichi’s day went surprisingly okay, considering it had started with a panic attack. In a way, he had been able to get some of his pent up emotions and worries out.
He was able to focus better in after school volleyball practice than he had in several days. It was a huge relief, both to him and his teammates.
Practice ended a little earlier than usual, and Kyotani and Yahaba were left to clean up. The rest of the team hurried out, happy for an early night.
So that left Kindaichi walking home with Kunimi as the sun set.
“I don’t want to push you, but…” Kindaichi looked up and watched Kunimi as he fiddled with his jacket, “I really think you should talk about what’s going on with you. On some level. To someone.”
Kindaichi sighed. He might as well share. On some level. “Remember that conversation we had? After the practice game with Karasuno?”
Kunimi looked at him attentively and nodded.
“Well… I’ve just been thinking about it a lot. About my sexuality and stuff, and wanting a relationship.” Kunimi made a sound of acknowledgement and he continued, “I’m not straight. I like guys—I don’t know how much, if that even matters, but I do.”
Kunimi finally took his eyes off him, looking forward, and it felt like a relief to feel the scrutiny gone. Even more relief flooded over him as Kunimi said, “Thanks for telling me. You know you can always tell me anything right?
“Yeah,” he nodded, “I know, it’s just… nevermind. Thank you.”
Kunimi studied him for a moment, then said, “I like guys too. Like, in that way.”
“Oh,” Kindaichi said, a little bud of hope blossoming inside of him, preparing him a little more for his confession to come, “I see.”
The next day, Kindaichi felt like he was about to scream. He wasn’t sure if it was a good scream or a bad scream or a frustrated one, whether it was words or just incoherent sounds he needed to get out of his system, but he needed to scream.
Luckily, the feeling wore off mostly throughout the day, and by the time the school day was over, Kindaichi was feeling pretty calm.
He and Kunimi stood at the entry area to the school building, changing their shoes.
There was a little, “Um,” and they looked up to see Kyotani standing a few feet away. “Can I uh, talk to you?” he asked, embarrassed. His eyes flickered to Kunimi in a silent, Alone .
“Yeah,” Kindaichi turned his attention to him.
Kunimi picked up his stuff and turned to leave, “I’ll go ahead,” and headed off to the gym.
“What’s up?” Kindaichi asked as Kyotani walked over, even though he had a pretty good guess.
He turned to the shoe locker and kicked it lightly, “I confessed to Yahaba.” Kindaichi watched patiently as he kicked it again, “I figured since it was just the two of us and the end of the day, it’d be the best chance I’d get.”
“How’d it go?” Kindaichi asked as he kicked the lockers a third time.
“He said he’d think about it and give me a response,” at this point, he started just giving the metal lockers light, repetitive kicks. “I didn’t even ask for a response. I specifically said he didn’t have to respond.”
“Well I guess that’s a good thing more than anything, right?” Kindaichi asked more than anything. “If he says he’s going to think about it and respond even if you told him he didn’t have to, then there’s probably a good chance he’ll return your feelings.”
“I guess…” Kyotani studied his foot as if he had to memorize every stitch of his shoe, “but I don’t even know if I want him to. What then? Are we supposed to date? I don’t—I can’t do relationships like that. I’m just learning this friends thing, but I wouldn’t even know where to start with actually dating. I wouldn’t…” he finally stopped his kicking and placed his foot down, “I wouldn’t be able to be the kind of person he deserved.” Then he took a couple steps back to wind up, and kicked the lockers one last time, almost hard enough to dent with an angry grunt.
Kindaichi flinched, then picked up his bag and hoisted it over his shoulder, “No matter what happens, Yahada-san is understanding. He would never make you legitimately uncomfortable.”
“I know, it’s just… arg!” Kyotani pushed his hands to the sides of his head. “What’s going on in that brain of his? It’s driving me insane!” Then he sighed, as if his annoyance from a second ago had vanished and now he was perfectly calm.
“Uh,” Kindaichi blinked, confused for a second. Then he remembered, “I came out to him properly last night. And he said he liked guys too so…”
Kyotani nodded in understanding, then, “This is Kunimi that you’re talking about, right?”
Kindaichi sighed and nodded, “The classic fall in love with your best friend trope.”
Kyotani stared at him blankly for a long moment, then walked past him, “Come on, we’ll be late for practice.”
Kindaichi followed with a soft smile. This guy was definitely improving. He cared about volleyball more, and he was making an effort to get along with and communicate with the people around him.
—————
Kindaichi watched as the ball Kyotani spiked went way off course. Normally, Yahaba would have yelled at him, but he didn’t, probably knowing he was the reason for Kyotani being off that day.
A little while later, Kindaichi witnessed Yahaba himself take a volleyball to the face because he wasn’t paying attention.
His own thoughts were preoccupied too. So much for being back to normal after his panic attack from the day before.
“Alright!” the coach finally yelled, a little angrilly. “Everyone, take a break!”
Kunimi immediately slumped to the floor, and though he wasn’t sweating or anything, he was visibly exhausted. It shouldn’t have been especially out of the normal, but for some reason, it was.
“What’s going on today?” the coach lectured as they picked up their water bottles. “Like a third of you are off today. What happened?”
You try coming out to your crush knowing you're about to properly confess to them, he was tempted to say, but he didn’t.
Kyotani apparently had the same thought minus the impulse control, because Kindaichi heard him mutter, “I don’t see you waiting for a confession response you didn’t even ask for.”
Judging by the unreadable look he flashed him, Yahaba must have heard too.
No one spoke up though, so the coach just sighed and said, “Clear your heads and try to focus. We’ll get back to practice in three minutes.”
—————
“Kindaichi, Kunimi, you two are on clean up duty!” Yahaba shouted as practice ended, the coach having summed it up a little earlier than usual.
Kunimi let out a groan of complaint, but didn’t say anything. Kindaichi called out a simple, “Okay!” The rest of them filed out of the gym.
Kindaichi and Kunimi got around to picking up the stray volleyballs and putting stuff away, a routine they were quite familiar with. Both of them fell silent, lost in their own thoughts.
Kunimi was taking down the net when he first spoke, “What did Kyotani-san want to you about?”
Kindaichi froze, “Oh, uh…” No need to panic, he reminded himself. “When you were sick a couple days ago, we ran into each other, and he needed someone to talk to, so I guess he felt comfortable enough to talk to me. This was just a follow up to that.”
“Okay,” Kunimi went back to taking down the net.
For a moment, Kindaichi was relieved, but then he remembered what Kyotani said about it being a good time to tell Yahaba, back when it was just the two of them in the gym. He could get it off his chest now, when it was just the two of them at the end of the day. Besides, their deadline was tomorrow—not that Kindaichi thought Kyotani would care if he never confessed. The agreement was more out of support and encouragement than a bet or deal. Still, he didn’t like keeping this bottled up. “Actually, there is something else.”
“Yes?” Kunimi immediately looked over again, giving him his full and undivided attention.
Kindaichi quickly turned away and started pushing the ball bin to the storage closet, “Nevermind.”
“Is it about what’s been bothering you lately?” Kindaichi froze. Kunimi sighed, “I don’t want to push you, but please, just tell me. I don’t like seeing you stressing yourself like this, I want to help.”
Kindaichi took a breath, “Well, it’s just… I mean I kind of… I guess what I’m trying to say is…” he collapsed over the ball cart in defeat, “I don’t know how to say it. I don’t even know where to start.”
“Just say it bluntly,” Kunimi provided simply. “Say it straight out and get it over with. You know you don’t need to worry about delivery with me.”
Kindaichi looked up and over at him gratefully. He took one more deep breath to prepare himself, then spewed the six words that could forever change their relationship.
“I have a crush on you.”
—————
Kindaichi was fine for about three seconds, but then Kunimi was just staring at him and his throat was going dry and closing in and it was like the panic attack all over again.
Kunimi noticed immediately, and led him over to the benches, retrieving a stray water bottle and handing it to him, calming Kindaichi before the panic attack could even set in. He didn’t say a word as Kindaichi took a few steadying breaths until his heart rate finally felt normal again.
Finally, Kunimi asked him, “Better now?”
He nodded, “Yeah.” There was a moment of silence between them, and then he said, “I’m sorry—”
“Don’t apologize.”
They looked at each other. Then Kindaichi turned away again and leaned forward onto his hands. More silence.
“You realized after the practice game?”
Kindaichi shifted uncomfortably, “I knew before then, but that was when I realized it was okay to like guys and stuff and then it just sort off…”
“Multiplied by a thousand?”
“Yeah.” After a moment, Kindaichi felt Kunimi slump against him and let out a squeak. He forced out the start of a question, “Wha?”
“It’s the same for me.”
Kindaichi looked down to see him offering his hand. He just stared for a long while, not sure what to do, until he could feel Kunimi getting impatient, and quickly laced his hand in Kunimi’s after only a moment more of hesitation.
Kunimi relaxed against him contently, and he gave his hand a light squeeze. Kindaichi squeezed back.
Kindaichi wanted to stay like this forever, but, “We need to finish cleaning up.”
“Just a little bit longer.”
And how could Kindaichi argue with that?
—————
As they were walking home and reached the area they usually split up, instead of stopping, Kunimi just kept walking in the direction of Kindaichi’s house.
His eyes flickered to Kindaichi as if he only then realized he should ask, “Is it fine if I come over?”
Kindaichi nodded.
They continued walking, and after a couple minutes of no words between them, Kunimi said, “You know I didn’t properly tell you.”
“Hm?” Kindaichi looked over.
“That I like you too. Because I do. A lot.”
Kindaichi had been able to figure that out from the whole hand-holding thing, but hearing out in the open was nice. He felt a heavy blush spread across his face. It must have been pretty obvious, because Kunimi let out a light laugh.
They fell into a comfortable quiet for the last little bit of the walk as they turned onto Kindaichi’s street.
When they got to Kindaichi’s house, Kunimi stepped out of his shoes, “Pardon the intrusion.”
Kindaichi’s mom appeared immediately, “Kunimi-kun! It’s nice to see you, it’s been so long. How are you?”
“I’m fine, Kindaichi-san,” he said quietly. Then he murmured a quick apology and gave a small bow, grabbing Kindaichi’s wrist and dragging him to his room.
Kunimi closed the door behind him and made himself comfortable on Kindaichi’s bed. Kindaichi sat down beside it, “What was that about?”
Kunimi shrugged and adjusted so his head was hanging off the bed near Kindaichi’s.
“So…” Kindaichi tried to find the right words.
“So…?” Kunimi echoed.
“What are we now? Like are we… a couple or something?”
“Dunno.”
Sometimes Kunimi’s short and vague answers could be really annoying. Kindaichi didn’t usually mind, it was just making this a little bit harder. “D–do you want to be?”
Kunimi gazed at him for a long moment. “I think I’d like to be,” he said in a quiet voice.
Kindaichi’s ears went red. He leaned his head back against the mattress. “I’d like that too.”
“Hey.”
“Hm?” Kindaichi turned.
Kunimi leaned in and placed a soft kiss to his lips. Then he turned away like nothing happened, “So for our English homework…”
—————
The next day, things were finally back to normal. Well accept that Kindaichi’s best friend was now also his boyfriend. It felt normal though, like it was only a matter of time.
They had agreed not to straight out tell the team unless it came up naturally, but they wouldn’t bother hiding it.
In the club room after morning practice, he told Kyotani things had gone well, and Kyotani actually smiled, saying he was happy it worked out for them. There weren’t any updates on his situation with Yahaba.
At lunch, Kindaichi and Kunimi went off to eat on their own just like they always did, but this time, they sat a little closer.
—————
Later, when Kindaichi was home (alone. Kunimi’s mom had him come straight home), he was sitting on the floor when his notifications started going off. It was the old Seijoh group chat.
The mighty Seijoh (ง’̀-‘́)ง ‘12
✧･ﾟ: * Oikawa-senpai *:･ﾟ✧: a little birdie told me the gay count on the team just went up
Captain Yahaba-san: watari i trusted you!!
Watarmelon: it wasnt me!
not a damn dog: …
✧･ﾟ: * Oikawa-senpai *:･ﾟ✧: *gasp* kyouken-chan speaks! also i dont know why yahaba is yelling at watari but now im intrigued
kunimi: calm down it was me
✧･ﾟ: * Oikawa-senpai *:･ﾟ✧: and a wild kunimi-chan appears too! but thats to be expected
Captain Yahaba-san: i am so confused now because HOW does kunimi know?! what are you guys talking about?
kunimi: i told oikawa-san about kindaichi and i
Captain Yahaba-san: what about you two?!
Kindaichi finally got the nerves to pipe in.
Kiddaichi: that we’re a couple now
There was chaos for a moment, and Kindaichi wasn’t able to keep up. It was Oikawa who finally brought the conversation back to actual conversation.
✧･ﾟ: * Oikawa-senpai *:･ﾟ✧: kunimi came to iwa-chan and i all like “help, o great senpais, for i am in love with my best friend. teach me your ways so i can make him fall at my feet”
Iwaizumi-senpai: thats not how it happened
✧･ﾟ: * Oikawa-senpai *:･ﾟ✧: youre right
✧･ﾟ: * Oikawa-senpai *:･ﾟ✧: he was like “how do you go from friends to fucking”
✧･ﾟ: * Oikawa-senpai *:･ﾟ✧: because he knows we have experience (¬‿¬)
Iwaizumi-senpai: thats not how it happened either
Iwaizumi-senpai: i can feel kindaichi blushing from here
Kiddaichi: im not that bad!
✧･ﾟ: * Oikawa-senpai *:･ﾟ✧: …
kunimi: …
Captain Yahaba-san: …
Watarmelon: …
not a damn dog: you literally went into a three week long gay crisis because you relized it was okay to like another guy. Youre the most easily flustered person on the team
kunimi: can confirm
Kiddaichi: i feel attacked. Also how did you know how long its been?!
not a damn dog: …
Watarmelon: kindaichi you are nothing if not obvious
Watarmelon: besides even if we didn’t know what was causing it it was pretty clear youve been off the past few weeks
✧･ﾟ: * Oikawa-senpai *:･ﾟ✧: ok now that thats settled and we all agree kindaichi-chan is painfully obvious
✧･ﾟ: * Oikawa-senpai *:･ﾟ✧: yahaba?! what was that about in the beginning?! youre not getting off that easy my dear successor!
Captain Yahaba-san: …
Captain Yahaba-san: kyotani you tell them
not a damn dog: why me
Watarmelon: yeah yahaba you do it mr captain
Captain Yahaba-san: ok
Captain Yahaba-san: i hate you all
Captain Yahaba-san: kyotani and i are together now as well
✧･ﾟ: * Oikawa-senpai *:･ﾟ✧: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
✧･ﾟ: * Oikawa-senpai *:･ﾟ✧: HA i told you iwa-chan
✧･ﾟ: * Oikawa-senpai *:･ﾟ✧: i told you it was only a matter of time after the wall pinning of last year
not a damn dog: what does that have to do with anything
✧･ﾟ: * Oikawa-senpai *:･ﾟ✧: (¬‿¬) nothing…
not a damn dog: disgusting
Captain Yahaba-san: why are you like this oikawa.
✧･ﾟ: * Oikawa-senpai *:･ﾟ✧: because im amazing
✧･ﾟ: * Oikawa-senpai *:･ﾟ✧: anyways seijoh couple count is back up to two!
Kiddaichi: back up to two?
✧･ﾟ: * Oikawa-senpai *:･ﾟ✧: yeah from last year
✧･ﾟ: * Oikawa-senpai *:･ﾟ✧: me and iwa-chan
✧･ﾟ: * Oikawa-senpai *:･ﾟ✧: and makki and mattsun
Iwaizumi-senpai: speaking of those two, where are they?
Captain Yahaba-san: youre right usually they would be all over this
Watarmelon: gossiping and whatnot
Makki the man: i have been summoned
Mattsunflower: sorry about that i was uh… doing stuff
Makki the man: by stuff he means me
✧･ﾟ: * Oikawa-senpai *:･ﾟ✧: ◑.◑
Kiddaichi: i hate that you guys were right about the easily flustered thing
✧･ﾟ: * Oikawa-senpai *:･ﾟ✧: makki! mattsun! keep in mind your precious kohai!
Mattsunflower: anyways whats going on
✧･ﾟ: * Oikawa-senpai *:･ﾟ✧: two new couples on the team!
Makki the man: °0°
Makki the man: who?
Makki the man: wait let me guess
Makki the man: yahaba and kyotani
Captain Yahaba-san: WHAT THE HELL
Captain Yahaba-san: WHY IS EVERYONE ASSUMING THAT
Makki the man: is it not you
Captain Yahaba-san: no it is…
Mattsunflower: :3c
Makki the man: you two were pretty obvious
Mattsunflower: ever since the wall thing
not a damn dog: can people stop with the wall thing
Mattsunflower: anyways
Mattsunflower: for the other couple
Mattsunflower: im betting kindaichi and kunimi
Makki the man: same
Watarmelon: you know you could just go back and read the messages
Mattsunflower: after. this is way more fun
✧･ﾟ: * Oikawa-senpai *:･ﾟ✧: ding ding ding! two for two! our gays are obvious
✧･ﾟ: * Oikawa-senpai *:･ﾟ✧: oh look what time it is! since im such a great senpai and know all of your schedules i know all of you are free now
Watarmelon: creep
✧･ﾟ: * Oikawa-senpai *:･ﾟ✧: group call! you all better join
A call came in, and Kindaichi joined after a moment’s hesitation.
Oikawa, Iwaizumi, and Watari were already on, and Matsukawa popped in soon after with both him and Hanamaki appearing on the camera. Yahaba joined, and then Kunimi.
Oikawa pouted, “Where’s Kyouken-chan? I’m going to bother him in the chat.”
“No need,” Yahaba said quickly. He turned his camera a little to show Kyotani there with him, “He’s here.”
Kyotani grunted in acknowledgment and pushed Yahaba’s arm away. Kindaichi could see the affection in his eyes as the frame moved back to Yahaba.
“Oikawa-san, isn’t it like, incredibly early for you right now?”
“Is five am that early? But yeah, I’m just making myself some food and then heading out for a run,” he adjusted his camera and stepped back, revealing he was in a tiny kitchen, and started bustling around.
“How’s Argentina?” Matsukawa asked.
“Fine, thanks for asking, but the humidity is horrible. How do people live like this? I’ve had to start using product to keep my hair so perfect!”
Iwaizumi snorted, “As if you didn’t use a bunch already.”
Oikawa made an offended squak, then very slyly changed topic, “Anyways, this isn’t why we’re here,” he popped back into frame and leaned forward. “How’d it happen? Spur of the moment kiss in the locker room? Dramatic declaration of love in the rain?”
“Uh,” Yahaba said awkwardly, “he confessed? I don’t know, it was pretty straightforward.”
“Took you a couple days though,” Kyotani grunted from off screen.
Yahaba turned to the side, “I had a lot to think about, okay?”
“Trouble already?” Watari smirked. Yahaba gave him a glare. Then Kyotani’s face appeared to glare at him as well, and he settled down right up next to Yahaba, causing him to go bright red.
“Kunimi, Kindaichi-chan, how about you?” Oikawa perked up.
“Um, it was also pretty undramatic?” Kindaichi said. “I just told him how I felt. I almost had a panic attack though.”
“ Another one, Kindaichi? Are you okay?” Yahaba asked.
“He’s okay now,” Kunimi said.
“I was just really worried about messing up our friendship! Kunimi means a lot to me, and I didn’t want to lose that.”
“Aw, that’s so sweet! I want to barf.”
“Makki! It’s young love, don’t tease him!”
Laughter radiated through the call for a moment.
“My question,” Iwaizumi spoke up, “is why you guys got together at the same time.”
“We found out about each other’s crush and supported and encouraged each other. Sort of,” Kindaichi said.
Kyotani nodded once in agreement.
“That’s what you two were talking about?” Kunimi asked.
“Comrads in gay,” Matsukawa said while Hanamaki nodded solomly.
“Wait I just realized I’m the only single person here,” Watari said.
Oikawa burst out laughing.
—————
“I’m tired,” Kunimi hugged Kindaichi and buried his face in the crook of his neck.
Two months of this and Kindaichi was finally able to act casual on the outside, but he was still screaming on the inside. He just couldn’t wrap his head around the fact that Kunimi was actually his boyfriend.
He patted Kunimi’s head softly, “Come on, we have to get ready for practice.” Kunimi groaned in complaint. Kindaichi smiled. “I love you,” he whispered.
“Mm, love you too. But I’m not changing.”
“Kunimi!” Yahaba yelled from across the locker room.
Kunimi’s head jerked up and he turned around to his stuff, pulling out his volleyball clothes.
Laughter rippled across the room.
They got ready for their practice game against Karasuno.
Seijoh won.