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Endless white. He drifts in the endless sea of nothing, a lost ship floating nowhere.
No sky or horizon, just white
…except, as always, for the flowers.
Bright bursts of sunshine yellow atop bright green stems; a splash of color in the void.
He’s no longer floating.
He felt it. He felt the gentle warmth contact his arm, that all-too-familiar sensation shooting up his arm and seemingly straight into his heart. Never the same as her touch, but it was the closest thing he had.
She was shining, smiling at him. Her eyes guiding him back to her, again.
“Everything turned out ok in the end, Cloud.”
“No…no, it didn’t. It’s not enough. Because… I lost you.”
“Cloud…”
They’re kneeling in her garden in Sector 5. He swears he can smell the lilies and feel the soil crunching beneath his knees.
“Aerith…”
She leans back on her ankles, brushing soil from her hands onto her sides. Green eyes meet blue.
“There was no other way.”
“I could have protected you. If only I had gone with you.”
“This was my burden to bear. There wasn’t…there couldn’t have been another option, you know. It was too late.”
“Why didn’t you ask for help?”
She reaches out to him and tucks a yellow lily into his shoulder plate. He can feel her fingertips brushing against his chest, that touch filling that terrible void in his heart and making him whole for that glorious moment, and he already knows what will happen, but he reaches out to grasp at her wrist, not willing to let that feeling go.
They’re standing at the dead end of the highway leaving Midgar. He sees three blurry figures close by, but she is sharp and glowing and almost real, her dress as pink as the sunrise sky above them.
“Every moment spent with you was a dream to me. I wouldn’t trade that for anything.”
“I would give everything to do it over. To do it right. To treat you better, to protect you. I was a fool, I—“ fingertips brushing his lip. He can feel them.
“Don’t, Cloud.”
“I never knew how much I loved you until it was too late.”
The sun rises in the distance, pink sky turning to blue.
Blue. Blue skies meeting blue water on the horizon, blue waves washing up onto the shoreline. They’re sitting side by side on the beach. She looks up to the sky.
“You showed me the world. The last months of my life were full of wonder and joy because of you. And yet you say you didn’t save me… “ she trailed off, pausing to look up at him.
“There was so much more to show you, Aerith. So much more I wanted to tell you.”
She smiles sadly, looking out over the ocean. Their fingertips touch. Cloud doesn’t dare to move.
Their fingertips are touching as she peers out the window of the gondola. Music booms from a distance and he can feel it. He can feel her.
“I had never seen fireworks before.”
“I wish I had done more. That was one of the last nights—“
“Cloud," she interrupted, "do you remember when I asked to meet the real you?”
“I remember.”
He can feel warmth from her skin through the just-barely contact.
She smiles. “This is my favorite memory of all, you know.”
“I always remember that night and wish I had done more. I always thought I had more time.”
“What would you have done differently?”
She’s closer. Her hand is on his now. He can feel it.
“I wouldn’t have let you leave.”
She laughs, “No, silly, here! On this gondola. The night I woke you up and you reluctantly went on our date.”
His heart pangs. Every time he relived his memory he wished he had been warmer, touched her more.
“Everything that I could.”
She’s moving to sit beside him. Is that what happened?
He feels her arms around his neck. His hands are shaking when he reaches out to touch her and he exhales when his hands make contact with the small of her back.
Emerald eyes meet blue.
“Cloud, would you really want that?”
He holds her close. “The only time I actually got to embrace you, was when I was carrying you to your grave.”
He can feel fingers in his hair. The scent of lilies floods his senses.
“I know.”
“I would give everything to do it again. I can’t take it, Aerith. I can’t take the emptiness.”
Soft hands caress his cheeks. He continued on.
“I was completely blind to everything. I always thought you would be there.”
Fireworks explode outside the window, reflecting in her eyes.
“What if you could do it all over again? What is the price you’re willing to pay?”
“What price wouldn’t I pay to be with you again?”
She’s smiling. Their foreheads are touching.
“I seem to remember you being very serious when it involved the price for your services.”
They’re kneeling again in the flowerbed, in the church. Light streams through the stained glass. The Buster sword is leaning against the broken altar.
“I want a future with you, Aerith.”
She takes him by the hand and they stand. She leads him to the broken altar, and she turns around. Her dress is white. Flowers are sewn into her braids, the happy cheers of their friends echo off of the stone walls. Emerald meets blue.
Lips meet lips. And Cloud can feel it.
Moments pass. The white becomes pink, they’re standing in a clearing. The sky is blue. She turns to the side, he can see the gentle swell of her abdomen through the fabric.
Fragments of memories from their stolen future pass through his vision. Her arms reach out to embrace him and his visions stop, he can only see her.
Cloud falls to his knees, sobbing. “How could you expect me to accept a future that didn’t include you?”
She kneels with him, she holds him to her, she is real, and he can feel her.
Aerith sighed, closing her eyes for a moment. “Cloud, what if you could truly do it all again? What if we were given the chance to defy fate? But, the price of that chance would be your memories. Would you still do it? Would you start at the beginning, if it meant forgetting me?”
Emerald eyes met blue.
“I could never forget you, Aerith.”
She was laughing softly. “Somehow, I know that even if you did…you would still remember. You would hold onto those fragments of memory until they became whole again.”
Cloud looked at her, seeing the indescribable look in her eyes. “Aerith…”
She took his hands into hers. “I know it’s so selfish…but I don’t want to lose those memories. The moments we’ve shared, the thought of losing them, it’s too much to bear.” She shook her head, caressing her hand to his cheek. “But.... If this is truly what you want.” He reached out to grab her wrist, but this time, his hand slipped right though her.
Green wisps of lifestream flowed up from the ground, melding with her form, her pink dress starting to break apart in his vision. He panicked, but she only smiled.
“We can change fate, Cloud. I believe we can. I have to keep that belief. Even if it terrifies me… I have to trust that we can change it…”
“Aerith, where will I find you?”
Her smile was shining, glowing, radiating to him as the rest of her body began to dissolve into the green glow. “Follow the yellow flowers.”
One more reach. Her face leaned forward to him, her lips meeting his.
“Every moment spent with you, I’ve cherished every one of them, Cloud.” All that was left was her eyes, and her voice. “I wouldn’t mind living those moments again…”
“Aerith? What’s happening?”
Green lifestream, emerald eyes.
“I love you.”