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Changbin barely even takes notice of Seungmin entering his apartment until the younger calls out his name. It’s not unusual for Seungmin to just show up unannounced, in fact he does it almost every day. He probably spends more time in Changbin’s place than at his own dorm room. But Changbin can’t blame him, because between his own apartment which he shares with exactly no one and a cramped dorm room in a cramped dorm building he would also choose his apartment. And it’s not like Seungmin is an unwelcome guest, Changbin literally gave him the keys the day he moved in. Because Seungmin is his best friend and just because his parents aren’t as rich as Changbin’s doesn’t mean he should suffer in the college dorms. That’s what Changbin thinks anyway.
“Changbin” Seungmin calls out again, because he didn’t get a reply the first time. Changbin only gives him an acknowledging hum, because he’s trying to concentrate on the 50-page article he has to have read by tomorrow. His focus is broken when Seungmin presses his cold hands against his neck and laughs at how he jumps in response. “What the heck” Changbin says, failing to look mad because Seungmin is laughing and it automatically makes him smile too. “How are your hands so cold when it’s only September?” he asks instead of complaining. Seungmin shrugs and sits down on the other end of the couch. “It was windy.”, is all the explanation he offers before he also pulls out his laptop and opens it, pulling up a tab with a page full of graphics Changbin thinks might be about lighting. Seungmin’s major is photography and it’s honestly lost on Changbin, whose only involvement is that he sometimes has to model for Seungmin’s assignments.
They spend the rest of the afternoon in relative silence, besides Seungmin’s occasional humming and Changbin sighing as his headache worsens with every new page of the article he tries to understand. He despises engineering sometimes. It’s not unusual for them, this kind of scene. Seungmin prefers studying in Changbin’s place because it’s quieter than the dorm but less formal than the library. Also, if it’s movie night he can save the extra way from the library, he reasoned once. Changbin doesn’t mind because seeing Seungmin study next to him actually gives him some sort of motivation to get his own work done, and sometimes Seungmin brings coffee.
It’s only when Seungmin’s finished packing his bag again that he speaks again.
“Do you think you can help me with my next assignment again?” he asks, already putting on his puppy face. As if Changbin would even say no. He’s not really capable of saying no to Seungmin. “Yeah sure” he says, “do I just pretend to experience nature for the first time ever again?” he references an absurd project Seungmin had to complete in his first year. Seungmin fake rolls his eyes. “No, uh, actually. I need you to take pictures of me this time.” he sounds almost apologetic. Changbin raises an eyebrow. “Are you sure I’m the best person to ask for that? I don’t mind helping but you know I can barely hold a camera straight, right?”. Seungmin almost pouts at him. “Yes, I want you do it.” He says, “you don’t need to know anything, I can explain. It’s a stupid assignment anyway” he huffs. “Yeah, why do you need to be photographed as the photographer?” he agrees, partially because he is also confused, partially to get the pout of Seungmin’s face. “I don’t even know” Seungmin waves his hands around, just to emphasize how much he does not know. “Something about ‘how can you be a great photographer if you do not understand your models’ or whatever. I don’t even want to photograph people” he falls back into the couch with another huff. Changbin reaches over to ruffle his hair. “Don’t worry, I’ll help you.” He assures and Seungmin is immediately grinning again. “You’re the best! I’ll treat you to coffee. Like, twice. To show my eternal gratefulness!” he sings, while jumping up from the couch. Changbin watches him with a smile that Chan would surely comment with “how do you not understand why everyone thinks you and Seungmin are dating when you look at him like that”. But Changbin doesn’t understand, because Seungmin and him have been best friends for years and he’s never felt anything more than pure, platonic friendship for him.
Seungmin apparently is overjoyed over Changbin’s agreement to help, he even hugs him before he leaves, which is unusual because he’s not big on physical contact most of the time. Changbin thinks it’s cute though, and he’s still smiling when the door closes after Seungmin.
“So basically, all you have to do is take pictures of me for three different concepts.” Seungmin explains, two days later when he’s back at Changbin’s apartment. Though this time it is planned because it’s move night anyway. He’s lying on the couch, head propped up on the armrest, taking up all the space with his legs. Changbin nods at him from the kitchen, where he’s pouring chips into bowls. He’s only using bowls because Seungmin likes them. If Jisung was here he would call him whipped, but Changbin thinks it’s just being nice and respecting Seungmin’s wishes. Jisung and him don’t like bowls, so why use them, but if Seungmin likes them then where is the big deal. “What concepts?” he asks. “Well one is pure, and the other is casual.” Seungmin says, now avoiding his eyes. “I thought you said it’s three?” Changbin questions, and Seungmin mumbles something, then immediately hides his face in the plush of the armrest.
Changbin makes his way over with the bowls of chips, setting them down on the couch table before turning back to Seungmin. “I didn’t quite catch that” he says and Seungmin groans. He lifts his head ever so slightly, says “the third one is sexy” and then hides his face again. Changbin barely manages not to laugh, but he’s pretty sure Seungmin can hear him snicker anyway. Seungmin lets out another groan, but he sits up, making space for Changbin to sit down next to him. “Don’t worry, we’ll just put you in a sexy santa outfit and it’ll be perfect” he can’t help but joke. Seungmin stares at him. “It’s not even Christmas time.” Is all he answers. He sighs, then presses his lips together. “Whatever. We’ll just do the other concepts first and then worry about it later” he decides. “That’s so not like you” Changbin replies but Seungmin pretends he doesn’t hear him, instead taking the remote so he can scroll through his Netflix recommendations. It’s actually Chan’s Netflix, because everyone knows his password. He’s not sure if Chan knows that everyone knows though. He doesn’t plan on telling him any time soon.
Seungmin settles on some depressed artist movie and Changbin pays attention for about ten minutes before he starts scrolling through his social media instead. That’s usually how movie night goes, Seungmin enjoys movies much more than he does, he just enjoys spending time with Seungmin.
It’s also not uncommon for Seungmin to fall asleep during the movies, either waking up when they end, disoriented and confused, or ending up crashing on the couch. So, when Changbin notices Seungmin slumping against the couch with his mouth slightly open and maybe snoring a little bit he just smiles and takes a picture. For blackmail purposes, as he likes to say. In reality he just sends them to Seungmin when he’s bored and wants to tease him. He turns off the movie, waiting to see if Seungmin will wake up, but the other doesn’t move. He sighs a little, then grabs a spare blanket from his bedroom and lays it over Seungmin, hoping he will wake up at some point and make himself comfortable, so he doesn’t wake up with terrible neck pain. It’s happened before. Seungmin grabs the blanket and mumbles something unintelligible. Changbin turns off the light and heads to bed as well. (Seungmin does wake up with terrible neck pain the next day.)
They start on Seungmin’s assignment the next week, because Seungmin doesn’t procrastinate and likes to have things done on time. He decided to start with the pure concept because it would be easiest. “As long as you wear white and lie in a flower field you pass” he explains to Changbin, as they make their way across campus to the small park Seungmin chose as shooting location. They’ve been there a lot, not just for shootings but also just to hang out or sometimes study. Seungmin looks almost funny in his full white outfit, his brown hair being the only contrast colour, but Changbin thinks he’s still pretty. Seungmin could probably wear a trash bag and Changbin would still find him pretty. As a friend. They make a funny pair, because Seungmin looks like he’s stepped out of detergent commercial and Changbin is wearing all black, never leaving the house without his leather jacket. Jisung says it’s because ‘he hasn’t grown out of his emo phase yet’ but Jisung says a lot of things. It’s towards the end of September but the sun is bright, reflecting off Seungmin’s sweater and heating Changbin’s arms through his jacket.
Because it is way past spring, Seungmin has to settle on grass instead of a flower field. He spends several minutes explaining his camera to Changbin and which buttons do what but Changbin can’t remember much more than “this is how you zoom” and “this is the shutter” but he figures it will be okay. Seungmin deems him well-versed enough after going through everything twice and carefully settles in the grass. It’s not as green as it would be earlier in the year, but it contrasts well enough with his clothes that Changbin thinks it should get the concept across. Seungmin throws him an expecting look and Changbin remembers he’s meant to give instructions. “Uh.” He says and Seungmin giggles. “Off to a great start I see” he teases. Changbin fake pouts at him. “You decided it was smart to ask me for help, so you don’t get to complain” he argues. Seungmin just nods and squints his eyes at the sun. “No complaints. Just think what would look good and then we’ll try” he says. Changbin fiddles with the camera and then raises it up, looking at Seungmin through the viewfinder. Seungmin gives him a thumbs up. “Well don’t do that” Changbin says, making him laugh.
Changbin’s first pictures are all too bright, and he has to have Seungmin explain again how he can avoid ending up with a completely white picture. He takes a few shots of Seungmin looking directly at the camera, but it feels off, so he makes him stare into the distance instead. Changbin is by no means an expert but he thinks Seungmin is doing a pretty good job, for someone who is usually the one taking the pictures. Or maybe he’s just photogenic and Changbin can’t tell the difference.
“Can you maybe close your eyes?” Changbin requests, after they go through all the pictures he took. Seungmin tilts his head as a silent question. Changbin shrugs. “I just think it might look better if your eyes aren’t open? Like you’re trusting your surroundings enough to close them? So it seems more pure?” he says, not sure how to explain his train of thought. Seungmin gives him a soft smile and agrees, moving back to his previous spot. The bottom of his pants is green and Changbin has to stifle a laugh. Seungmin sits down again, hugging his knees to his chest and resting his chin on them. “Like this or…?” he asks, and Changbin thinks for a minute before deciding his arms should be on top of his knees so he can comfortably lie his head down on them. Seungmin follows his instructions, closing his eyes and Changbin lifts the camera again. The sun has started setting by now, illuminating Seungmin in a more orange light than previously, and Changbin can feel his heart tug at the sight. Oh. That’s new. Seungmin looks beautiful, as always, but something inside of Changbin feels different, looking at him like this. He quickly takes a few pictures, pushing the feeling back down. Maybe it’s just satisfaction that his idea worked out so well. Seungmin’s eyes sparkle when he looks at the pictures. “You did a really good job, Binnie, these look great!” he compliments and Changbin wants to hide his face. He always likes it too much when Seungmin uses his nickname. Seungmin treats him to coffee, as promised, and they set the second shooting date for three days later, when they both have the day off.
Because Seungmin is avoiding the sexy concept with all he has they end up in the park again, although his clothes are less white today. “Are picnics casual?” Changbin asks, raising an eyebrow at the basket Seungmin brought. The other boy shrugs. “My professor thinks they are. But there’s actual food in this so if you make it look casual, I might share it with you” he grins. Changbin shoves him lightly. It’s how he shows affection. Seungmin is wearing a jeans and jean jacket combination that Changbin would surely raise an eyebrow at if it was anyone else, but it’s Seungmin, so he thinks it looks fine. At least his shirt isn’t jean too.
Changbin manages to get the brightness right without mistakes this time and takes a few pictures of Seungmin just sitting on the blanket he brought along but it feels a little too set up. “Can you try lying down?” he suggests and Seungmin complies, closing his eyes because the sun is now right in his face. “Oh, that’s good” Changbin says, “but try relaxing your face.” Seungmin rests his face on one arm and Changbin’s breath hitches. His heart does a little jump. Oh, great, so it wasn’t a one-time thing. He presses the shutter a few times before he realizes he’s been staring at Seungmin without actually looking through the camera. It doesn’t get better from there on, because when he asks Seungmin to open his eyes and look at the camera, it feels too intense. He didn’t notice it last time, but Seungmin’s eyes hold a certain intensity when he looks at the camera that makes Changbin feel very warm. Or maybe it’s because he’s once again wearing his leather jacket when it’s completely sunny. That really doesn’t explain the blush on his face though. Seungmin doesn’t seem to notice.
Maybe it’s for the photos, maybe it’s to torture himself but Changbin takes a few close-ups of Seungmin’s face as well. Have his lips always been that pretty? This is bad, Changbin thinks. “Maybe we should try a second location?” he says. “Is it not working out well?” Seungmin asks, unaware of the emotional distress that he’s causing. “No, it’s fine, but I just thought you might want a background that’s not grass, since you had that last week too.” Changbin lies through his teeth. He suggested a different location in hopes Seungmin might look less handsome in another setting. “Actually, that’s a good idea” Seungmin agrees, sitting up again. “Should we try the library entrance?” he suggests. Changbin nods. “Okay then we’ll go after we eat” Seungmin says, already handing Changbin a sandwich. Seungmin goes through the pictures while they’re eating, occasionally handing the camera back to Changbin to show him a picture he particularly likes or give pointers on what to improve. The entire time he talks Changbin stares at his lips. Really, when did they get this pretty? When did Seungmin start being so attractive? Maybe Changbin just watched too many romance dramas recently. Because Seungmin started liking them, so they often watch them together. Changbin thinks he might finally understand why their friends think they are dating.
Changing location was a bad idea. Not for the pictures, but for Changbin’s heart. The library entrance is, for a lack of words, kind of fancy. It’s an archway, leading to the stairs, red brick and weird ornaments. It absolutely does not match the rest of the campus and it’s of out of place, but definitely a pretty shooting location. Because they had lunch first, the sun is now high in the sky, and Changbin has to ditch his jacket. “Why is it this warm, isn’t it meant to get colder by now” he complains. “Global warming.” Seungmin deadpans. He leans against the wall, waiting for Changbin to adjust the camera settings. When Changbin focuses on him he feels his heart thump again. Seungmin’s shrugged his jacket off one shoulder and because Changbin is shorter than him and also too close currently he has to look down at the camera, eyes half-hooded. Changbin presses the shutter without even breathing. “I thought this was meant to be the casual concept?” he jokes, while taking a few steps back so he can take pictures at a better angle. One that’s less bad for his heart. Seungmin looks surprised. “What?” he asks, then his expression morphs into a grin when he understands the implication behind Changbin’s words. “Are you saying I look hot right now?” his smile is bright and Changbin hides behind the camera. “Global warming is hot. Not you.” He says. Seungmin doesn’t look convinced. “You are allowed to think I look hot, you know” he’s still smiling. “You should be thinking that next time, actually.” Changbin groans, quietly. “We will see when we get there.” Why is Seungmin not stressed about that anymore when he could barely tell him last week? Changbin figures it’s because he realized he can make Changbin flustered and enjoys teasing him. Seungmin is much more mischievous than most people would assume.
Changbin’s suspicions are confirmed the next day, when Seungmin is once again hanging out at his apartment. “Take a look at these and tell me which one you like best” Seungmin says, placing his laptop in front of Changbin and getting unnecessarily close. It’s the pictures they took yesterday, of course including the one Changbin took first at the library. Seungmin has to be doing this on purpose. “This one” he says, pointing to it, because Seungmin would know if he was lying. Plus, he is mildly curious what his response will be. Seungmin quirks an eyebrow. “Oh really,” he says, and then “so you enjoy being looked down on.” He’s grinning wide. Changbin’s jaw almost falls down. “The audacity” he says, turning to Seungmin. But he forgot how close Seungmin got earlier because now he has to look up to meet his eyes and that just proves Seungmin’s point. Also, it doesn’t help that his eyes landed on Seungmin’s lips first. Seungmin is still grinning and Changbin just huffs and looks away. “Aww” Seungmin coos. If Changbin didn’t love him this much he would punch him. Maybe he should join Minho for boxing someday soon. Then Seungmin pats his shoulder a few times as if to apologize and says: “I’m just joking, you know that, right?” Changbin nods and leans into his side. Maybe he wishes Seungmin wasn’t joking. Because the way his heart jumped in his chest when he got too close to Seungmin tells him he’s no longer looking at him as just a friend.
Changbin wants to scream. It’s the day they are shooting the last concept, and he has been dreading it. Seungmin has been joking around a lot more recently, trying to see how flustered he can make Changbin and it’s been stressful. He can’t even count the amount of times he’s had to turn away to hide his pink cheeks from his best friend. And he hates that that’s what Seungmin is, his best friend. If he was just some crush then maybe Changbin could confess, or get over him fast, but this is Seungmin. Kim we-have-been-friends-for-over-10-years-and-now-suddenly-I-want-to-kiss-him Seungmin. Seungmin, who would never reciprocate his feelings, whose type is tall pretty boys, not Changbin, who is smart and kind and fun and altogether probably too good to be real. Seungmin, who showed up in front of Changbin’s door in dress pants and a white silk shirt, asking if it was sexy enough. Which is the reason why Changbin currently wants to scream. He’s seen Seungmin dressed up before, but that was years ago, at their high school graduation, when Changbin didn’t even let himself look at other boys in any way beyond friends yet, when he didn’t feel anything for Seungmin. Now he very much looks at boys in every way beyond friends and he definitely has feelings for Seungmin. And Seungmin looks really hot. Changbin had choked out a “yea sure” and then fled into the bathroom. So now he’s hiding in his own bathroom, from his best friend, who he desperately wants to kiss. Casual Tuesday. “Get your shit together” he tells his reflection, before splashing his face with cold water. It doesn’t do much besides get the collar of his shirt wet. He sighs and leaves the bathroom again. If he’s going to embarrass himself anyway, he may as well get it over with.
Seungmin is leaning against the kitchen cabinets, looking at his phone. Changbin almost turns and runs again because he forgot just how handsome Seungmin was today. He has his sleeves slightly rolled up and Changbin never noticed just how big his hands are, but his phone seems so small in them. Changbin has held it enough times to know he can barely reach across the screen with his thumb. Seungmin’s hair is darker too, or maybe it’s the lighting, but it contrasts nicely with his pristine white shirt.
Changbin swallows dryly and walks up to him. Their shooting location is his apartment today. Because Seungmin had decided that “right before you leave for a fancy event” was a sexy concept. And Changbin is the only one of their friends that doesn’t live in the dorms or halfway across town. So it was an easy choice. Except now Changbin has to deal with a dressed up Seungmin in his apartment and keep the memory of how good Seungmin looked forever. Seungmin looks up from his phone when he hears him come closer. “All good?” he asks, actually concerned. If only he knew he was the cause of Changbin’s cardiac problems. “Yeah, you?” Changbin deflects. Seungmin nods. “Hoping we can do this fast so I can get out of these pants. I hate dress pants with a passion.” He whines. Changbin would think it’s cute, if his thoughts hadn’t immediately gone to thinking of Seungmin without pants. It made nothing better. “Did you put on makeup?” he asks, instead of indulging those thoughts. Seungmin laughs a little. “Felix insisted. Said it can’t be a sexy concept if you’re not going all out.” Changbin laughs too. “Sounds like him.”
Seungmin hands over his camera and they make their way to the hallway. Changbin has already arranged everything the way Seungmin requested, shoes in a neat line and winter coats hung up, instead of the usual leather jackets and hoodies he keeps on the coat rack on his wall. Seungmin seems to think for a second then asks: “Do you mind taking the pictures from a very low angle today?” “No” Changbin says. “Okay great, because I was thinking we can do like, a storyline? Like first I tie my shoes, then get up, put on a coat, walk to the door, leave?” Seungmin explains his plan. “Then why does the angle need to be low?” Changbin questions. “Because you like it?” Seungmin teases before quickly adding on “No, I don’t know, I read somewhere that it’s supposed to be more seductive or whatever, so I wanted to try.” Changbin decides that two can play that game. “Time to get on my knees then” he throws Seungmin a wink too, just for good measure. Seungmin splutters something unintelligible. Changbin feels very accomplished. They take the pictures in relative silence, because Changbin is trying to not have his heart break his ribs and Seungmin is probably still trying to think of a comeback. He has to admit, the sequence works out well, and Seungmin does look very attractive. He didn’t think it was possible to look sexy while tying shoelaces but here he is, on the floor, capturing Seungmin doing exactly that and it makes his throat dry and hands sweaty. Seungmin is not healthy for him.
Seungmin approves of all his pictures except for the last ones, where he pretended to leave the apartment. “It just doesn’t look natural?” he shrugs. Changbin shrugs too, Seungmin is standing behind him, looking over his shoulder, and the close proximity between them is rendering him speechless once again. At this point it won’t be long until Seungmin realizes something is up and confronts him about it. Changbin needs to get it together. Maybe he will get over this crush soon. “Maybe if I look at you instead of the camera? Like, make eye contact with someone behind the camera? Let’s try that.” Seungmin suggests and Changbin nods. It doesn’t make things better. Instead of looking intensely at the camera, Seungmin is now focusing all his attention on him. And even though Changbin is looking through the camera half the time he can feel Seungmin’s stare on him and it makes him shudder. “Dude,” Seungmin says, making him look up. “Are you sure you’re okay? Are you getting sick?”. He sounds genuinely concerned. Yeah, Changbin really needs to get it together. “I’m good,” he says and quickly holds the camera in front of his face again.
Seungmin doesn’t ask him to retake the pictures again and Changbin is grateful because he doesn’t think he would have survived that. While he’s waiting for Seungmin to change his clothes and also his heart rate to drop, he sends a text to Chan. He figures he has to talk to someone about his current predicament, and Chan is least likely to laugh at him.
Me: so like
Me: hypothetically
Me: if i had a crush on Seungmin
Me: what would i do about that
It doesn’t take long for Chan to reply.
Channie: HELP
Channie: are you serious???
Me: yeah why
Channie: sorry I just??
Channie: tell him, obviously
Me: i can’t just do that
Me: what if he doesn’t like me back
Channie: oh I wouldn’t worry about that
Me: ???
Channie: Binnie we don’t tease you about dating because we think it’s a one sided thing
Channie: just tell him. Trust me.
Me: uhm
Me: maybe
“Who are you texting?” Seungmin asks, flopping down on the couch next to him. He’s entirely too close, their thighs are brushing and Changbin’s pulse picks up again. Why the fuck does he have to feel like this after ten years of friendship. “Chan,” he replies, quickly turning his screen off so Seungmin can’t read what he sent. If Seungmin really wanted to read the messages he could, he knows Changbin’s password. Changbin has never felt the need to hide anything from him before.
Seungmin doesn’t seem to care though, he just grabs the remote and skips through the Netflix recommendations, like he always does. It’s like nothing has changed, yet nothing is the same.
Seungmin sits closer to him than usual, or is it just Changbin’s imagination? Is Seungmin really looking at him throughout the entire movie or is it just because he feels Changbin staring? Does Seungmin not fall asleep because he feels the same electricity between them as him or is it just one of the rare days where he stays awake? Changbin’s thoughts are running a marathon in his head, while Seungmin seems unaffected, resting his head on Changbin’s shoulder. He gives him a longer hug than usual when he leaves. Or maybe that’s just Changbin’s imagination again. He doesn’t confess to Seungmin, stays quiet about the way his heart aches when the taller boy waves goodbye one last time before closing the door.
Chan’s messages don’t leave his mind for the next few days. Neither does the way he feels about Seungmin. If he had any hope left of this being just a short-term infatuation, it’s gone now. Seungmin remains oblivious to the fact that he’s the main reason Changbin will die of a heart attack at the young age of 21. If anything, he seems to become touchier and clingier every time they meet. Which is a lot. Changbin doesn’t mind because he enjoys having him close, but he’s pretty sure Seungmin will realize pretty soon how his pulse increases every time they cuddle. Maybe Seungmin does know and he’s just teasing him. Changbin doubts that though. It’s because the weather has been colder recently, he reasons. “You okay?” Seungmin asks on their movie night the following week. He’s been resting his head on Changbin’s shoulder again. Changbin didn’t realize he was tensing up enough for Seungmin to notice. “Uh yeah. Your head is just heavy” he jokes. Seungmin lightly headbutts his arm as answer and then moves to lie it on his thighs instead. Oh. That is new. Changbin has to consciously stop himself from jerking his legs and hurting Seungmin. When on earth did he become a panicked gay? Seungmin looks up at him from his new position with a grin. “Is this better?”, he asks and Changbin almost swears he’s trying to tease him. But that wouldn’t make sense, would it? He just shrugs as response and pretends to focus on the drama Seungmin put on today. Seungmin falls asleep in his lap that night and Changbin doesn’t even dare to move him like he usually would, instead choosing the neck pain that will come in the morning as he dozes off still sitting upright.
Another week passes without Changbin telling Seungmin how much he wants to kiss him. “You’re usually more confrontational than this” Chan says, when Changbin complains to him about how cute Seungmin is for the 5th time that same week. “Usually it’s not my best friend of ten years who doesn’t have feelings for me.”, he says. “Yeah, about that,” Chan finally looks ups from his laptop and focuses on Changbin’s face instead. “He definitely has feelings for you.” Changbin rolls his eyes. “Platonic feelings, Chan. Not ‘I want to kiss you and hold your hand and hug you to go to sleep’ kind of feelings.” He’s explained this multiple times. Chan just gives him a smile. “Why don’t you ask him about that.” He says and turns his focus back to his work. Right, this is meant to be a study session. Except Changbin really can’t focus on his reading when his brain is stuck on the way Seungmin smiled at him when he left his place yesterday morning. Fuck he wants to kiss him so bad. He doesn’t tell him during movie night that week either.
Seungmin visits him unexpected-expectedly again the Monday after. Changbin hears him open the door and hastily take of his shoes before he calls his name. He’s early, it’s barely 9am and the only reason Changbin is awake is because he has a 10am class. Seungmin knows that, he doesn’t usually visit on Monday mornings unless it’s very bad or very good. Changbin isn’t even dressed yet but he goes to meet Seungmin in the hallway regardless. Seungmin has seen him in worse states. The younger is, of course, fully dressed and looks pretty as always. He grins when his eyes fall on Changbin’s pink sleep shirt. “What are you doing here so early?” Changbin asks. Seungmin’s grin gets wider. “I came to say thank you! I brought coffee too, I put it in the kitchen,” he says. Changbin can’t help but return his grin. “Oh and to what do I owe the honour?” he asks. Seungmin presents him with his phone screen as an answer. Changbin squints his eyes, still not fully awake as he reads the email Seungmin received from his professor about how his work was exceptional and he would be giving him extra credit. It’s hard to read when Seungmin is slightly bouncing up and down, (which he always does when he’s excited and Changbin thinks it’s very cute) but he eventually gets it and looks up to congratulate Seungmin. Except the words get stuck in his throat because Seungmin is looking at him expectantly, eyes big and sparkly and still smiling. He’s so beautiful and Changbin loves him so much.
“Changbin?” Seungmin says, expression quickly switching to concern at Changbin’s silence. “You’re so pretty” Changbin says, then immediately realizes his mistake. “I mean wow that’s amazing” he corrects himself but it’s to no avail. Seungmin definitely heard him and what he said as cover up didn’t even sound remotely similar. He feels his face heat up and just prays it isn’t as red as he thinks it must be. “Huh,” is all Seungmin says about that. He takes a step closer and Changbin barely manages to not move backwards. Seungmin is smiling again but it’s teasing now, Changbin can tell. “You think I’m pretty?” he says, eyes never leaving Changbin’s. Changbin decides it’s probably time to stop pretending like he’s not head over heels in love with his best friend. “Very pretty,” he affirms. Seungmin’s smile grows wider. “Thank you,” he says, carefully coming another step closer. “Anything else you want to tell me?” he says and Changbin gulps. There’s no way Seungmin knew this entire time, is there? “What about you?” he asks back instead. Seungmin tilts his head to the side a little. It’s cute. He’s still smiling. “Well,” Seungmin starts, “I also think you’re pretty. And I think that maybe you like me a little more than as a friend.” Changbin really hopes his face is not as red as it feels right now. The way Seungmin said it makes him hope though, hope that maybe Seungmin does return his feelings. Seungmin is still looking at him, expectantly. “What if I say yes?” Changbin whispers. He’s not sure why he’s whispering.
“I’d tell you I like you back.” Seungmin says, without a hitch in his voice or any change in expression. He must have been planning this, Changbin realizes. Okay, he thinks, there’s no way he can be reading this wrong anymore. “I like you,” he says, finally facing Seungmin. “I know.” Seungmin says, smile growing wide again. “I like you too, by the way,” he adds and Changbin can’t help but smile along with him. “For how long?” he asks, curious as to if it was him or Seungmin who started pining earlier. Seungmin laughs at that. “Changbin, I have literally been in love with you since middle school” he says. His tone sounds like he can’t believe Changbin wasn’t aware of it this entire time. “Seriously??” And here he was thinking Seungmin was the oblivious one this entire time. “Yeah”, Seungmin shrugs. He finally pockets his phone and instead reaches out to take Changbin’s hands. “I have another question.” he says and Changbin just nods. Seungmin looks at their intertwined fingers, as if he’s suddenly shy. If Changbin squints he might even spot a small blush on his cheeks. “Okay there’s something I’ve been wanting to do for a very long time…” Seungmin starts his sentence, his eyes flickering to Changbin’s, then down to his lips. Changbin doesn’t need him to finish his question before he replies “yes” and closes the distance between them.
Seungmin is tall and he has to stand on his tiptoes a little bit, but he doesn’t really mind. Seungmin’s lips are soft and he’s careful at first, almost shy in returning the kiss. Changbin thinks maybe this is when he finally does pass away due to a heart attack. If he’d known that kissing Seungmin feels this good he would have done it sooner. He can feel Seungmin smile against his lips as he finally deepens the kiss and moves his hands to cup Changbin’s face instead. Changbin isn’t quite sure how much time they spend like this, only breaking apart when Changbin’s alarm starts going off in his bedroom again.
“Oh fuck.” Changbin says. It’s his ‘you’re gonna be late for class if you don’t get up right now’ alarm. Seungmin just laughs at the panic on his face. “You’re so cute,” he says and Changbin knows he turns tomato red at that. “Go get ready for class” Seungmin says and gives him a gentle push towards his bedroom so he can get dressed. Changbin’s blush doesn’t go down while he’s getting dressed or hurriedly packing his bag. It definitely doesn’t go down when he sees Seungmin sitting at his kitchen table, the coffee he mentioned earlier in front of him, and still smiling.
“What are you smiling about?” he asks, just to say something. Seungmin wiggles his eyebrows in a way that has to be meant to be funny and says “oh nothing. I’m just having a very good morning.” Changbin takes the coffee he pushes his way before walking around the table and stopping only when he’s right in front of Seungmin. “Me too.” He replies, then he leans down to kiss him again.
Seungmin happily kisses him back and Changbin considers just skipping class and doing this for the rest of the morning until Seungmin pulls away. He’s still smiling. “Go to class. I’ll be here when you come back.”, he says. Changbin may have pouted at him. Regardless, he hurries to put on his shoes and coat. Seungmin follows him to the door. “Changbin,” he says and Changbin turns around to focus on him. “I really like you a lot.” Seungmin says. “If Chan makes fun of me because I’m so red then that’s your fault” he replies. Seungmin gives him puppy eyes. “And I like you too.” Seungmin smiles his bright smile again.
Changbin gives him one last kiss before he runs to class.
He’s late, and Chan does make fun of him, but Changbin thinks it’s all worth it.