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Chuuya stared mournfully at his apartment for the last time. The apartment was bare. Void of all hints of life. The video games and books that used to line the shelves beneath the TV were gone. The kitchen, which once held a plethora of plants and framed pictures stood bare. It all looked so sterile. It was everything Chuuya worked hard to change, to turn into a home for the two love birds. But alas, it was all for naught as Dazai had cheated on him.
Tossed him to the curb and left him. It made the red headed man angry, Dazai had promised he wouldn’t abandon him again after the incident with Lovecraft and yet here he was. Wearing sweatpants and a stained t-shirt with his hair tangled from a lack of care because he’s spent the last two weeks being given stares full of pity paired with self deprecating thoughts.
His self esteem was in fact in shambles. After all, the person (?) that Dazai left him for was a 7 or 8 foot tall green beast that brushed his teeth with literal slugs and smelt like a body decomposing in the back of Chipotle. The small man huffed and walked through the rooms again. Surveying them to make sure nothing was left behind. As he walked he tried to fight off the memories that came rushing back.
In the living room there used to be a couch, covered in warm blankets and pillows. Some of which Dazai acquired after the bastard mummy noticed that his (ex) husband collapsed on it all the time, exhausted from work. After all as an executive Chuuya worked long and sporadic hours meaning sometimes he’d stumble back into the apartment, bloody, bruised and exhausted.
Dazai sometimes came back late bruised and exhausted too. Yet back then, Chuuya believed they were from a battle, little did he know.
The kitchen was full of memories of Chuuya cooking breakfast and Dazai sleepily slinging his arms over Chuuya’s shoulders and nuzzling his neck. Leaving cute little butterfly kisses in-between mutterings of honey sweet words.
Words Chuuya would never hear again. Words that would now be told to some bald bitch with the fashion sense of a blind goose crossbred with an inebriated medieval peasant clown.
The bathroom where Chuuya would sit idly in Dazai’s lap in the tub while the other washed his hair and rubbed his back after extra stressful days. Ones where he felt like Arahabaki was slamming against the bars of his mind and tugging against whatever chains were keeping the beast in place.
Luckily for Snow White’s tallest Dwarf, since he still had work to do, broken heart be damned, he simply trained himself to ignore it once again. After all, he lived his best life in those 4 years without Dazai. Yes, it hurt for a few months. But the world kept turning and life moved on. And he found himself filling time with new, better people. Video Games with Dazai became tea time with his dear sister. Watching the sun dip below the horizon and sharing kisses, became boisterous dinners with the Black Lizard. Where Akutagawa would act like a moody preteen and attempt a murder once he was handed a kids menu because ‘If he acted like a child he might as well be treated like one’ and then Tachihara would become enthralled with the coloring sheet and crayons. And Gin would join him with gentle art critiques all the while Higuchi fretted over portion sizes and Hirostu would just sit there, watching fondly.
Just like that it was like his vision was clear. Soon, he found himself backtracking. Suddenly, the bathroom was now where he, Gin, Kouyou, Higuchi, and a very confused Akutagawa squeezed in together to paint their nails mafia black. He got flashbacks to days where suddenly, the living room was instead a home theatre. Tachihara would drag the male mafia members and some of the detectives over to watch a movie. Chuuya always wanted to pick a dog one, but he never would admit it out loud. Finally, the kitchen. The place where he would end up teaching the detective agency’s man tiger and Kyouka how to make sweets.
Thoughts of the ADA soon made him wonder if the green eyed gremlin detective he had a score to settle with said anything to Dazai about his cheating. Maybe he did. Maybe Dazai just didn’t listen. Chuuya shook his head and grunted before turning to head towards the one room he hadn’t looked through yet. The bedroom. He stopped at the door and took one long shuddering breath.
There was nobody else here in his memory. Just him and Dazai. Nights of passion and tears and yelling and whispers and secrets and so much more. Memories assaulted him, attacking him in droves and he felt himself slipping away, drowning in them. They shoved themselves down his throat and he felt himself choke on the making tears slide down his cheeks.
He stood there just letting the bitter tears fall while he was alone. Once again it struck him that just like those 4 years so long ago he’d just have to get used to it and power through it. Wiping his eyes with the back of his hand he finally started to look around only to find nothing of importance to him. There was a picture beneath the nightstand, however to the real strawberry shortcake it meant nothing (it did, it really did, but he could lie to himself for a little while). Afterall what use was a picture of him and someone soon to be dead to him.
He picked it up and crumbled it up before tossing it over his shoulder.
“Ouch! Watch where you throw things,” whined a voice from behind him.
“Dodge next time you ass,” grunted Chuuya as he continued to rummage for approximately 30 seconds before he jumped up and turned around to become face to face with the heartbreaker and monster fucker himself, Dazai.
Said monster fucker grinned, “Chuuya, that’s a rude way to greet your one and only husband.”
Chuuya grimaced, “Ex,” he spat out through gritted teeth.
Dazai frowned, “Right. Right. Ex. But we’re still partners.”
Chuuya huffed and looked up into Dazai’s eyes, the little self restraint he had was slipping like sand between his fingers. Taking a deep breath he bit his cheek. Holding back from going off. However his fuse was short and it wouldn’t take much for Dazai to light it. “Well color me impressed. It seems the chihuahua has learned to stop it’s useless barking.”
“Shut up.” Chuuya said, quietly, calmly even.
Dazai raised an eyebrow, “What was that? I couldn’t hear you from down there.
“I said shut up! Hell it might even be for your own good. I’m surprised your jaw doesn’t hurt from the amount of shit you spew from it!”
The taller man smirked, “It’s actually sore from taking in everything he had to offer, just another thing to add to the list of things you lack.”
The rejected garden gnome grimaced, “First of all. That’s fucking disgusting. Second of all you really want to tell me what I lack when you lack loyalty.”
“I’m surprised you didn’t get the hint when I left the mafia. Your mistake, honestly.”
Chuuya’s gaze stayed locked on Dazai’s as he marched forward towards him, “I don’t make mistakes. Just date them apparently.”
The brunette rolled his eyes, “Oh please. I was never interested, just bored. You were easy.”
That hurt, but it did not stop Chuuya from returning the blows, “You know what, you weren’t worth the energy of convincing Ane-san, the entire mafia, that you changed.”
A tense silence filled the room and unspoken words filled the room. Chuuya wanted to bring up Oda, however he didn’t want to stoop down to Dazai’s level.
The human personification of an stared at him, "Listen Chibi-"
"Chibi?!" Chuuya snarled, "You lost the right to call me Chibi when you decided to mess around with that- that- OGRE! They aren't even human Dazai."
Dazai opened his mouth to snark back, but Chuuya beat him to the punch, "And don't even think about pulling any of the edgy 'I'm not human shit' because you are! You're just as human as almost every other person in this city! You make mistakes-"
"Shrek wasn't a mistake," he said coldly, causing Chuuya to stop mid rant for a second and avert his eyes. And when he finally met Dazai's eyes again, he was horrified to see them empty and distant. As if the progress he made over the years with the other had disappeared in an instant. That wasn't his lover, well ex lover now. That was the demon prodigy. A cold hearted man, however, Chuuya could never truly bring himself to call him a monster. Before Chuuya could even attempt to pick up again. Dazai spoke again, "Shrek may not be human, but I at least know where he comes from. You on the other hand. Not even you know what you are."
Chuuya physically recoiled, backing away. That had hurt more than corruption which tore him out from the inside, in an attempt to kill his organs, more than the emotional toll of waking up in a field alone. More than walking up to his prized car and watching it explode leaving only a metal husk. “Maybe having that god, Arahabaki, inside you made you think you were one as well. Face it, you’re nothing. You’re just a shell meant to keep a god from causing mayhem inside. Lucky for Arahabaki, it's cage is already proficient in the art of self destruction."
Chuuya felt gutted, hurt, and he also felt the need to express it to Dazai in the most direct way possible. By absolutely rocking the bean pole’s shit with a singular bunch to the jaw. Dazai wouldn’t wake until hours later. And once he woke up Chuuya would be gone. (and so would his wallet).
Dazai sighed and opened his eyes only to see the crumbled up picture. He unscrambled it and sighed once more. “I’m a fuck up. Aren’t I?” He muttered to no one.
Meanwhile Chuuya sulked his way to his temporary room in Kouyou’s apartment. And as he walked he came to realize a number of things. Like how Dazai was wrong, that he wasn’t alone, that he settled for Dazai and it wasn’t his job to fix him, and that he could do better. (Once he put himself back together)
Across Yokohama in some wack basement some war a Russian smiled. Double Black was no more and Arahabaki was now close to dancing straight into the palm of his hand.